Using Text Messages To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

Using text messages to get your ex boyfriend back can be one of the most effective “recovery” tactics that one can employ. In fact, if done correctly, a text message can bring up reminiscent feelings that can set you on the right path to getting your ex back. However, there seems to be a huge misunderstanding among the women out there on how to actually use text messaging effectively. I am not going to lie to you, sending a text message is a huge risk, if done incorrectly you will decimate any chance you have of that happy reunion you keep daydreaming about. In order for this to work the landscape has to be set up in a certain way. Allow me to explain.

Why Most Women FAIL When Texting

(For more in-depth information on why women fail at texting check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO)

Since you are all beautiful women ;) I am sure you have had your fair share of suitors. Now, out of those suitors, throughout your years in the dating realm there has had to be one guy that didn’t pick up the hints. He texted you, you ignored, he texted you again, you ignored again and so on and so forth. It usually looks a little something like this:

no hint text

Essentially, this person turned into a text terrorist. The text receiver was clearly ignoring the sender but they refused to accept that fact so they kept texting until they they could get a response. Most women fail at texting their exes for the simple fact that they commit this texting sin and quite honestly it’s not even their fault. Right after a break up everyone involved is out of whack emotionally and are prone to do some really stupid things. I have heard plenty of stories where women, in the heat of the moment, texted their exes multiple times, even after getting no response.

In essence, texting an ex boyfriend after a breakup is usually not a good idea. The better idea is to wait until the opportune moment where can maximize the power of the text message. First though, before we can do that, we are going to have to figure out how to create that opportune moment.

Creating An Opportune Moment

opportune moment

This is going to sound really weird but for the next month I don’t want you to talk to your ex boyfriend.


Yup, I know it sounds ridiculous but trust me, doing this will stack the odds in your favor in a very unique way. Did you know that after a breakup 95% of men still think about their girlfriends too much? Since I am a guy I can definitely say that this is a very true statement. The experts call this “freeze out” the no contact rule. Essentially for 30 days you are not going to talk, text, email or write to your ex. Oh, and in case you are wondering it is not going to be easy. Since you are on my site I am assuming that you are interested in somehow trying to get your boyfriend back. No matter how hard it is or how much you want to talk to him DO NOT DO IT, even if he responds you have to ignore it.

More About The No Contact Rule


Here is how the psychology behind the no contact rule is supposed to work. As a guy, I will admit we have a warped way of looking at things. For example, after a breakup a guy will think something like…

“Just wait, she will text me begging to come back.”

Now, that is wrong on so many levels but you are going to use this type of thinking to your advantage. By completely taking 30 days to yourself without texting him or talking to him at all you are slowly taking control of the situation. Instead of thinking

“Just wait, she will text me begging to come back.”

He is going to be thinking..

“Why hasn’t she texted me yet? Has she moved on already?”

Do you see the power of the no contact rule now? It is basically the ultimate way to get him checking his phone every five minutes to see if today is the day that YOU will text HIM. That is how you create your opportune time to text him!

Texting Strategies

(For the complete texting strategies please check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO)


If you have advanced far enough to have created that “opportune moment” there is still a lot that has to be covered when it comes to texting. There is a subtle art to texting. You can’t go zero to sixty in a second when it comes to this. In fact, you have to slowly lead up to the moment where he or you will hopefully go out on a date again. Allow me to explain this strategy a little more in depth.

The First Text

Have you ever heard that first impressions are everything? Well, that statement certainly rings true in this case. After basically blowing off your ex for a month straight your first text to them better have some substance to it. I always like to say that you should make your first contact text so interesting that they have no choice but to respond.



Remembering The Good Ole Days

One of the most interesting things about text messaging is the fact that every holds their texts as sacred. Very rarely will anyone ever willingly show someone their text messages. It is like their phone is their own personal sanctuary holding all their secrets and feelings about things. You are going to use this fact to your advantage.

IMPORTANT - You cannot move on to this text message until you successfully complete the first text message above.

The key with this type of text is to get your ex to remember the good parts of your relationship. The way you accomplish this is by going into great detail on one of the most positive experience that you had together as a couple. If you do this correctly you will bring up his most positive feelings about the relationship and get him thinking about you in a different more positive light. Now, while it is important that you get him to think positively about you it is also extremely important that you remain as positive as well. That means you can’t get angry if things don’t go according to plan. Handle every single text and interaction you have with your ex with as much grace as possible.

So, now that you have an idea of how to approach this type of a text lets look at a good example:


Is There A Place For A Jealousy Text?

This section is a little controversial, I am not going to lie. Some people have called this tactic manipulation but my job isn’t to give my personal opinion on this matter it’s just to give you the tactics that others have had success with. Jealousy can be a powerful motivator for a man. I remember once that one of my married friends told me something very interesting about the male psyche. He said that a man is a pretty simple creature. If he gets too used to a woman his eyes will tend to stray. However, if the woman he is dating/married to starts going to a bar and flirting with other guys he will come back down to earth and do everything that you want a good boyfriend or married man to do.

IMPORTANT - You cannot move on to this text message until you successfully complete the first text message above.

So, how does a jealous text work. Well the idea behind it is pretty simple, send a text message to your ex that could potentially get him jealous and bring up some of the lovey dovey feelings that he felt during your relationship. As a guy I can tell you that nothing makes you want a girl more than when you see her talking with another guy that is even moderately attractive. Here is how a jealousy text message would go:

jealousy (did I see you at)


If you haven’t already realized this, getting your ex back can be a very complicated process. In fact, I wouldn’t be shocked if this entire page confused you. Don’t worry, I got your back and I want to help you understand the best way you can get him back. There is a lot more to this process and quite frankly this page doesn’t do a great job of describing exactly what you do step by step. So, if you are intrigued by this method but very confused I urge you to visit get my 100 page guide, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO. It may take you a while to read through the entire thing but it will break every step of the ex recovery process down for you, in-depth. It will also go into extreme detail about how you can use text messages to get your ex boyfriend back.

Learn How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back
Put your email address in the box to the right to follow along day by day as I show two women (Sarah and Kai) exactly what they need to do to get their ex boyfriends back.
1,504 Responses to Using Text Messages To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back
  1. Angel
    February 25, 2015 | 7:11 am

    Hi! I actually need some advice. I met my ex- boyfriend 6 months ago, although it was a on again off again relationship. Everyone in my family despises him and I never understood until a week ago. Apparently he had hurt his younger sister sexually a long time ago, not only that but I had found out he was flirting with other women. Although I miss him at times… I’m not sure if I want him back or not. Any advice?

    • admin
      February 25, 2015 | 9:38 pm

      He hurt her sexually?

      Isn’t that a bit of a red flag?

  2. PZ
    February 25, 2015 | 2:26 am

    My boyfriend and I broke up about 2 weeks ago. Our relationship was perfect when we were together, but it was hard to see each other more than 4-6 times a month. He tells me that he loves me and cares for a me a great deal and that he so badly wants us to be together but that he feels this will be best. He’s my first love and I’m his first too. We were best friends before we got together and the last 2 weeks we’ve been trying to talk as just friends and I tried to get a sort of friends with benefits thing with him but he said it’d be too hard because he loves me and he can’t do those things without keeping all his feelings for me. He’s moving to 3,000 miles away in 4 months which is another reason he thought this would be best. I’m confused this came out of nowhere and then a few days ago he cut off all our communication. Just days before he was telling me how Im still his best friend and that he will always be here because he cares for me. I’m trying to respect his wishes, but I truly think he’s making a very big mistake. I want to text him how much I miss him, but I’m afraid if I don’t do it now he’ll forget about me. What do I do?

    • admin
      February 25, 2015 | 9:34 pm

      I think the him moving thing is something you are going to have to overcome…

  3. BRV
    February 25, 2015 | 1:00 am

    Hello, my girlfriend and I have dated for a year and a couple months. Come last Novemember we broke up because I tend to take away her freedom and freak out when she goes out with her friends. Poorly implementing techniques I learned I got her back around December. But unfortunately it was too soon and I didnt change. Because of that we have broken up again last Friday. I’m not to sure how to get her back or if there is a chance to get her back a second time. Should I go through no contact again?

    • admin
      February 25, 2015 | 9:29 pm

      Please visit my other site, Ex Girlfriend Recovery. That is more adminiable to your situation.

  4. CC
    February 23, 2015 | 10:48 pm

    I really need advice. I dated a guy for 8mths. It was my 1st relationship and his 1st serious one. All other ones he ended in 4-6 months. We have a lot in common although he doesn’t think so. He thinks I’m not as social or adventurous as he is. Our parents arent thrilled bc of cultural backgrounds, but they were coming around. He tried ending it in December because he thought things werent working. It was a stressful time and I wasnt happy. He immediately (like a min later) decided it was a mistake. I tried so hard after that to not feel insecure or get upset, but sometimes I did when I thought he didn’t feel the same way about me and we argued occasionally. He shuts down with conflict. I like to communicate. Mostly we were happy. We laughed together and had fun talking to each other all the time. He was stressed with work, so I tried hard to make things easier and let him work when I was with him. We work at the same institution and no one at work knew. It made me awkward around my coworkers. He liked to go out with them, but that was hard for me to do without giving things away. He said he’d tell them soon. We went on a trip and he said he needed to work because a test was coming up soon. I let him work or sleep when he needed thinking that it was the best way to support him even during the trip. I recently had to go away for work for 2 weeks. This was right after we got back from the trip. He talked to me every day multiple times a day like normal. He was cute and fun and asked my advice for things. Then I got back all excited to see him. He said he doesnt think it would work. He had decided 2 weeks ago after the trip and didn’t want to upset me while gone. He did this all over the ph. He said he couldn’t quite explain why but thought we were too different. That he was more social than me and liked going out (this was just one example – he couldn’t give me more). I told him that I was awkward bc of the secrecy at work (close friends knew) and that he wanted to work so I was being supportive. He said he must have handled things poorly but that he doesn’t think this is his “dream relationship,” but that he still cares and likes talking/hanging out. He ended it bc doesnt want to string me along. He wanted to still be friends, but he imagines the ideal relationship would be easy and he wanted adventure (I do too!). He never once mentioned his concerns the past 2 months. I thought things were getting better. I’m so confused. I feel like he doesn’t realize that relationships require work and that there’s no perfect relationship. I think he’s scared because this is also the most serious one he’s been in. a few hours after he texted saying I miss you already. It’s soo hard. I’m trying to cut him off, but I don’t get it. What does it mean?

    • CC
      February 23, 2015 | 11:15 pm

      I’m supportive. I love him. I try to take care of him. I’m smart, pretty, and have an awesome job. He’s not out of my league (if anything ppl always say it’s the other way around, but i still think he’s the most attractive person I know despite that). So is this just a fear of commitment? Or is there something irrevocably wrong with our relationship. I admit I should have pushed to get him to open up, but I thought I’d let him do that naturally at his own pace. He admits he should have communicated, but thinks that in the long run we’re not likely to be happy even though he was happy he just thinks we dont have the “dream relationship.”

      • admin
        February 24, 2015 | 9:22 pm

        Its looking that way about the commitment.

    • admin
      February 24, 2015 | 9:19 pm

      He seems like he needs more maturing in his life bc all relationships require work to survive.

      • CC
        February 24, 2015 | 11:28 pm

        We work together. Won’t that mess up the no contact?
        What do I do when I see him?

        • admin
          February 25, 2015 | 9:25 pm

          Literally writing an article about this now.

          Its coming out friday.

  5. Hollie
    February 23, 2015 | 11:49 am

    Hi Chris
    My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me 4 days before valentines day following an argument about something I found (unintentionally) in his emails.

    I did no contact for 7 days but then ended up texting him/dropping by to speak to him as we were basically communicating through text messages passed over by his sister (asking for things back etc) We spoke civilly and I work at the same place as him so I didn’t want anything to be awkward or for him to feel like he can’t come in the office. We spoke for about 45 minutes, and ended with a hug. He said he needed some time and I said we both need space. I text him when i got home saying i’m glad we spoke, no hard feelings and he replied yeah none whatsoever.

    I’ve not spoke to him since then (4 days ago). My issue is he is literally going out every single night in groups with lots of other girls. He’s added so many new girls on facebook and yet hasn’t accepted my friend request (he had blocked me as a misunderstanding)

    I feel like I never even existed to him and he has already moved on and forgotten about me. We had so many plans for the future.

    I would take him back in a heart beat but I feel like I’ve lost him forever. I’m putting on a brave face, going out at weekends and trying to keep busy but it’s so so hard. I’m back on no contact now but not feeling at all hopeful. Could he have moved on so quickly?

    What do you think could be the outcome :(

    • admin
      February 23, 2015 | 9:49 pm

      You are doing the right thing.

      Try not to focus so much on what he is doing. Focus on what You are doing.

  6. lucy
    February 23, 2015 | 12:47 am

    I was with my bf for a year, he always said he had attachment issues and throughout the year communication was scarce on both ends. Things were hot in the beginning but cooled off after we became official and never progressed. I tried to make him happy but nothing worked and I wasn’t happy. We had a planned trip to jackpot with a group of friends, and that morning he was acting sullen (a common occurance before trips) I knew what would happen, he would put me in a bad mood and he was able to act completly fine in front of friends, I on the other hand wear my emotions in my sleeve and I knew it would ruin our trip once again. I couldn’t have it. We mutually split just as our friends arrived, he went to jackpot and I stayed behind. While he was gone I cleaned all of my stuff out of his house and left my key in a viable place. I’ve heard of the no contact rule so while he was gone I unfriended him and all of his friends so he had no way to view my profile, I also changed my status to single and began moving on while he was on our vacation alone drinking and gambling his money away. That was Friday, they were back Saturday and I went bowling with the same group of friends that he went to jackpot with. He wasn’t there because they told him not to come because he was being too “moody.” I haven’t been posting anything about what I have been doing but I have been keeping busy, taking better care of myself,getting my life back together and hanging out with as many people as possible without getting drunk. Today is Sunday and he text me, called me and messaged me on Facebook asking if we could talk. I wasn’t going to answer at all but 4 hours later I asked what he wanted to talk about (I know I shouldn’t have) but he text me back and said, not over text. That was 6 hours ago and I havn’t responded. I feel like I have the upper hand but am unsure of what to do next. I won’t text him back but but it’s making me crazy. Honestly tho I don’t know if I want to go back. I just want him to remember me and realize he f***ed up.

  7. Mina
    February 23, 2015 | 12:15 am

    What if my NC ends on the day of his Birthday? Do I write something nice or do I just say something really casual?

    • admin
      February 23, 2015 | 9:33 pm

      No, write a few days after his birthday in that case.

      • Mina
        February 23, 2015 | 11:07 pm

        Wouldn’t he think I’m playing games with him?

        • admin
          February 24, 2015 | 9:18 pm

          As opposed to what you are doing right now thats not working?

          • Mina
            February 24, 2015 | 9:59 pm

            You’re right but I know he would be really hurt if I don’t send anything. Is there anything I can write that would be okay?

  8. MD
    February 20, 2015 | 9:24 pm

    Is there any possible way you could email me? I really need some advice, but the situation im in I CANT post. Please. We have a child together and im at the end of my roads.

    • admin
      February 21, 2015 | 12:04 am

      The best way to get an answer from me is to record a voicemail for the podcast or comment… I am no longer going to do emails anymore (I am getting too overwhelmed by them.)


      • MD
        February 21, 2015 | 12:58 am

        Please it won’t take long!!!!!

        • MD
          February 21, 2015 | 12:59 am

          All I can do is email

          • admin
            February 22, 2015 | 4:26 pm

            I am sorry but I have to stop emailing but I am more than happy to help you on here or on the podcast.

  9. Emma
    February 20, 2015 | 6:31 pm

    I got dumped by him
    We walked home one day and it was really nice because I hadn’t seen him in a week but we were like normally
    I think I could tell he still likes me a little but
    But he said he feels different
    What does that mean ?
    And wheni leaved him when walking home he give me a long and tight
    Hug and said “text me later …if you want”
    But then we text me about 1hr later asking a question

    And soo confused I need help to see what he is thinking and if he might wanna try again or not

    • admin
      February 22, 2015 | 4:08 pm

      Well, do you just want to know what he is thinking or do you want him back?

  10. lupe
    February 19, 2015 | 9:26 am

    I cheated not just wiyh one guy but 3. He found out a day after valentines day. I was taking a shower and when i went back to his room i saw him going trough my phone. He didnt think i saw him. He saw messages witb the other three . We had a day planed of fun stuff to do that day, but he said get dressed so i can take you home. He didnt look mad just wasvso.serious. we didnt talk on the way back to my house. But when we arrived i asked what was going on he said ” ill let you know when i txt you ,maybe”. When he left i sent him a message saying ” i know what is going on ” i tried to explain why i did it he didnt wanted ti hear a reason he just said “Own what you did and move on”. Does this means i cant get him back ? Please help i want him back

    • admin
      February 20, 2015 | 11:20 pm

      Well, I think right now, no you can’t get him back.

      With time though, its much more possible.

  11. tina
    February 19, 2015 | 12:40 am

    i broke up with my boyfriend by never texting him back, he texted few times saying hope everythings ok and then saying is it something i probably did? and said wish u well and then after a month and 5 days he texted saying i never formally said good bye to you and he wrote goodbye…should i text back or not if yes then what should i say?

    • admin
      February 20, 2015 | 11:04 pm

      Well, if you want him back then eventually you would have to contact him yes…

  12. Regina Filange (friends)
    February 18, 2015 | 5:15 pm

    I had a quick short text message chat with my ex that I started and his last response he was really enthusiastic but quite friendly too. In the text was a question. He broke up with me because ‘something wasn’t right. I want him to realise that i’m moving on (even if i’m kind of not). Do you think not replying will make him curious or just annoy him? The question was asking me about this football team game im playing…

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 10:11 pm

      Did he give you any more information other than “something wasn’t right?”

      • Regina Filange (friends)
        February 20, 2015 | 8:57 am

        ‘He loves and cares about me but he doesn’t love me enough and doesn’t make enough effort.’ Basically said I should go find someone better.

  13. Jess
    February 18, 2015 | 11:16 am

    Hey chris I really need your help I contacted him after the no contact period.. This is how the convo went

    Me: I have a confession to make..

    Him:Ah yeh
    Him again: And what’s that

    Hour later:

    Me: I ate this amazing spit roast gyros from this new Greek place, it was just like Greece with the chips in it! Made me think of you, I know you would love it!

    Him: How is that a confession…

    Me: If u had one u would understand! I can’t speak.. going into a movie :)

    Was this a negative convo?? Should I still contact him in 2 days with another text or wait a week?

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 9:54 pm

      Hmm… you probably should have waited 30 minutes instead of an hour…

      Also, I don’t think its negative. I think its more neutral.

      Try something else other than the I have a confession text next time.

      • Jess
        February 19, 2015 | 2:29 am

        In 2 days or a week? And is this ok for the next message..

        “I just stumbled across a DVD of suits, reminded me of how we used to watch it together. Made me smile:)”


        Remember when we took Charlie for a swim and she nearly swam away? I was so scared we would have to jump in after her!! That was a nice afternoon :)

        Or do u have another suggestion?

        • Jess
          February 19, 2015 | 9:53 am

          Or am I meant to wait a week and use the “been thinking lately and you popped into my head” ?

        • admin
          February 20, 2015 | 11:07 pm

          I like the suits one!

          Give that a try.

          • Jess
            February 21, 2015 | 3:40 am

            He didn’t reply.. I think I might go on another 3 week no contact and try again

            • Jess
              February 23, 2015 | 7:34 am

              Do you think I should wait a week and try again or wait longer?

              • admin
                February 23, 2015 | 9:42 pm

                Wait a week and try again

  14. Kathy
    February 18, 2015 | 5:24 am

    Someone please help me. On friday feb 13th my boyfriend of almost 2 years found out i had kissed another guy. I was drunk and it didn’t mean anything, and he has done sketchy things in the past too, but he broke up with me and has barely talked to me. I’ve texted and emailed him a bunch, but he just doesn’t respond. We also have 2 classes together bc we’re in college, and we are both going on the same spring break trip-just us two- in less than 3 weeks. Should i do the no contact rule since the trip is so close? I don’t want him to think I dont care and Im not giving effort either. Someone please help me!

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 9:50 pm

      Ouch… Friday the 13th.

      You should take a look at my cheating articles. You might find them helpful.

  15. Jordan Gillespie
    February 18, 2015 | 2:17 am

    My partner and i have just broke up literally for no reason and no indication this was coming. We got back last week after 7 months of not talking and he was the one that came to me and i decided to give him that second chance! Last week we spent the most amazing week together, spoiled me rotten, said how he has learnt his lesson, wants to be with me and take things slow which i agreed. Went out last weekend too was all amazing even the Monday he left and then that evening after his work i knew something was up and he didnt speak to me or his family for two days. We eventually got him and he told me to delete his number for no reason and i had said what i had to say to him but he didnt reply! So yesterday i asked if we could talk and he said lets just leave it this job im starting is big and i dont neeed any distractions sorry! Now that there is bullshit! We discussed this job as its only half an hour in the car away from me and it would be more weekends away for us and good to take things slow! Nothings adds up at all. I know him well enough to know he wouldnt come back say all the things he has! Do all he has done to just do this! Telling me hes happy as a pig in shit etc! I dont know if he is upset about something he feels he cant tell me just now or he just doesnt know what to say and reply just now! so i was just going to leave it now and not contact him but like I really wanna know if he will realise and come to his senses?

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 9:48 pm

      Not unless you make him come to his senses with influence.

  16. Melanie
    February 18, 2015 | 12:16 am

    Me and my ex broke up in October and we dated for a little over two months. I’m still in love with him. But he’s with this new girl he asked out on Valentine’s day. and he told me that if he already didn’t have a thing with her he’d consider dating me again. What does that mean?

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 9:39 pm

      Good ole Valentines Day…

      Are they serious?

      What do you know?

  17. Emma
    February 17, 2015 | 1:12 pm

    I just got my ex back! Don’t know to be happy or not though, since he is the same douchebag as always. I didn’t do the no contact thing, I just started being more nice to him. He picked my up on Valentines day at 6 am in the morning, stayed at his place for 3 days.

    Though, seeing him again kind of makes me realize why I dumped him, I guess that sometimes it’s better to just leave your ex alone and get on with your life. I did dump him cause he never wanted to cuddle, kiss or talk, I thought he would change if I dumped him, but nah..

    • admin
      February 18, 2015 | 9:15 pm

      I am sorry he hasn’t changed.

      Glad you got your ex back but its unfortunate he hasn’t changed.

      • Emma
        February 19, 2015 | 5:27 pm

        Yeah, we talked it over and actually he said that maybe we should take another break. Though he did tell me one thing, the cutest thing he’s ever said to me. (Actually it’s not that cute but since he’s never romantic). He said “I like you so much, you’ve been so sweet to me, no one has ever been so sweet to me”. I know he’s had it rough in life, and that he doesn’t have a lot of real friends. Maybe he’s depressed or something, I’ve had another boyfriend who was that, and couldnt take in or give love either. He was just rude and only wanted to stay inside. So they’re the same..

        He still contacts me though, he must be lonely. Feel sorry for him.

  18. Sad
    February 17, 2015 | 10:49 am

    Hi Chris
    My boyfriend of nearly 3 years broke up with me 4 days before valentines day. As of yesterday he has blocked me off facebook and deleted some of my close friends.

    We have had a pretty rough time recently with bickering and arguing. I have been doing no contact since last wednesday after I text him saying I loved him, he replied saying he loved me too but he just knows it won’t work.

    Some of my family thinks he may have cheated on me (due to numerous reasons, snapchatting other girl, finding a hotel invoice I didn’t know about which he said he stayed in with his friends yet the invoice said (mr & mrs surname) which he strongly denied)

    I love him so much and would do anything to have him back. It’s so hard not contacting him but i’m nearly at 1 week.

    Do you think he’ll ever get back in contact with me? We seemed pretty fine the day before we split until I text him about finding this invoice. I miss him immensley and just want him back in my life. I can’t concentrate in work or anything. He said he feels like we are 2 different people and I don’t like the person he is anymore.

    He had booked a valentines meal for us and planned a day out and we were saving up to go on an immense holiday. I just don’t understand and it’s killing me. I’m trying to carry on as normal but it’s so hard.

    Day 6 of no contact, I know it’s early days but I don’t think he will ever be back in contact. Please give me a boost :(


    • Sad Amy
      February 19, 2015 | 9:07 am

      Please :(

      • admin
        February 20, 2015 | 11:17 pm

        Please what?

        Am I missing something here?

  19. Jessica
    February 16, 2015 | 10:48 pm

    Hello :) so my ex and I stopped talking last month, out of nowhere. After about 2 weeks, I started telling myself to get over him that he’s probably interested in someone else though he’s the type of person who would be open about it and tell me the truth. So he decides to text me the day before Valentine’s day (a month after we stopped talking). I feel like up until that moment, I’ve made it too easy for him. Everytime he wanted us to see each other, I stopped what I was doing for him. So we talked for a bit but I was so mad that he tried to just come back and talk to me as if we had never stopped talking, that I started playing hard to get by not replying. But I fear he won’t try to text me again and I want him to because I miss him. What should I do?

    • admin
      February 17, 2015 | 12:35 pm

      I think he will!

      In fact, he might be more intrigued by you now.

  20. Angie
    February 16, 2015 | 1:44 am

    My boyfriend broke up with me four days ago the night before we were supposed to go to a hotel on the river walk to spend valentines weekend. He bought me a dress to wear and a designer wallet. He broke up with me after work ( we work together). His excuse was because we fight too much. I begged for him back the morning after but he said he just needs a break. After that I didn’t text him at all. He has texted me the past couple of nights asking how I am and telling me about his new car and telling me he had a dream about me. I’ve been short with him but I really want him back. Do you think he will get back together with me? Will no contact work? Should I just ignore him at work and when he texts me?

  21. Aubrey
    February 15, 2015 | 11:32 am

    Hey Chris.
    I could really use some help with this one,
    As a little bit of backstory: Yesterday morning I looked on my boyfriend’s Facebook and read some messages between him and a buddy of his and he said something extremely offensive about me and about how much tail they were going to chase when they move away (?), so I got all hot lookin (It was Valentine’s Day as I’m sure you know) and went over to his house and got my things, pretty flustered but not ungraciously, I told him that it was over and I didn’t want him to contact me or try to see me again. Well that kind of backfired when I had to go back to his house because he had lost his phone the night before and the person who had found it called me, being the last person who called him. Now this resulted in him calling me asking if I had his wallet, and both of us were pretty pissed but when I got home I took a nap and when I woke up there were a dozen roses, chocolate, and a letter that kind of explained some things a little bit, but not really, so we texted and called back and forth, I did some yelling, some tearing up, but overall I wasnt cruel or crazy or anything like that, he told me he had all these feelings for me and saying those things to his buddy was a way of testing me to see if I was reading his Facebook (which I have once before) and I got angry and I hung up. Well he called me 4 or 5 times until I told him I didn’t want to talk on the phone anymore and once again hung up. Then I texted him that I was sorry for invading his privacy and sorry that our relationship didnt work out and that I wasn’t going to be walked on or disrespected, no matter how much I wished I could make it work. He waited a few hours and then responded with “please don’t leave, I was wrong”.
    Now we’ve had a few ups and downs, but overall we’ve been really happy together, I just never felt like I was getting the appreciation I deserved. Now I’m wondering, is it too soon to take him back? And If I do, will things be different? I want to make him sweat a littIe, and I want to be the ungettable girl, but he’s already “begging” for me back so I just don’t know if I want to push my luck. For example, If I went more than a few days without talking to him now, he’s bound to think that I just don’t give a damn about him, and knowing him he’s going to respond in a negative way. I guess what I’m asking is; is there a way to make him want me more, without ultimately pushing him away?

    Update: He just texted me again as I was reading this, apologizing and asking me not to leave him! Gahhhh what do I do?!”
    Thanks for taking the time to read this, even if you don’t reply, it helped getting everything written out. Still kind of stuck in a corner and would appreciate any advice you could give me, asap!

  22. Cindi
    February 14, 2015 | 10:05 am

    Me and my ex boyfriend dated for two years. We lived together and had a really great relationship with maybe only 3 arguments total. About 8 months ago, things got tough. We list our communication and he broke up with me. I moved out and left. 3 months later I texted him all the wrong things. I told him I loved him and missed and how I wanted him back. Oh and I told him I was pregnant, which I am. And it’s not his. He didn’t text me back. He kept ignoring me until finally he got mad and said enough and told me he needed space. I know we are meant to be. He has never been fond of kids though. I am almost done with the 30 day NC rule, and I’ve worked alot on myself. I know I don’t need him but he does make me a better person inside and out. He has yet to even try to reach out to me as ND all his friends think I’m crazy. He listens to his friends and family before he even formulates an opinion. Honestly, do I have a chance to get the love of my life back?

  23. Dina
    February 13, 2015 | 1:24 pm

    Hey Chris, I really need your help. My boyfriend and I broke up in August because I had cheated on him last December. Before the final breakup, we made up once and the last time we had been together, it lasted for about four months. The thing is, he said he wanted us to still be friends and all that stuff, which I have believed up to a point. But we are at the same school, in the same class and the problem is we don’t talk at all at school. Since September, every party both of us attended ended up with him taking me home or going to his place and at that time, everything seemed perfect, he admitted loving me still, but when we were at school, no contact at all. Even though I thought I moved on, the truth is, I haven’t. It’s kind of hard because I get to see him every day and no matter how hard I try, these feelings don’t go away, as we had been together for almost 2 years. Do you think there is anything I could do to get him back? I kind of applied the NC, but I don’t really think it worked. Today I called him and he didn’t answer. What would you advise me? Please help me and thank you in advance !

  24. Daphne
    February 13, 2015 | 1:08 am

    Hi Chris, this is not exactly about an ex-boyfriend. I hooked up twice with this guy I knew from high school. I guess you can’t say we’re really friends, but we’re more than acquaintances. He moved to another city a little while ago and I must admit I have strong feelings for him. I know he isn’t exactly an ex-boyfriend but I would like to get in contact again with him but I don’t know how. We haven’t spoken to each other for 2 months. Back then he wasn’t interested in a relationship but we had a good time together. What should I do?

  25. Kaesha
    February 12, 2015 | 11:26 am

    I would love if you right an article about how to apoligize to your ex after a breakup i wanna apoligize for my part in the breakup but i dnt wanna seem desperate either and make it soo obvious i want him back i plan on texting him but i dont know yet how to convince him im truly sorry

    • admin
      February 16, 2015 | 10:14 pm

      What did you do that warrants an apology?

      • Kaesha
        February 17, 2015 | 9:54 am

        I was accusing him of cheating and i found out he wasnt so i feel bad about it hes pissed at me ignoring me so i been giving him space but he been with this new girl for a couple weeks that i think is a rebound because they dating right after the breakup

        • admin
          February 17, 2015 | 1:14 pm

          Its understandable why he is mad…

          What made you feel he was cheating though?

          • Kaesha
            February 19, 2015 | 1:30 am

            All of a sudden he started being weird and distant towards me he wasnt being his usual self he would be on social media but ignore me and it made me mad

  26. AL
    February 11, 2015 | 2:44 pm

    My bf broke up w me couple days ago. We had only been together a month but we both fell hard and fast. He started pulling away making excuses…live to far away, i would never really be happy w him..etc. he said he needed coup,e weeks to work thru things. I gave him his space and didnt hear from hm so I ended up send him few text asking him why he didnt want our relationship(he never responded til coup,e days ago). He said he didnt want to see anyone right now and just wasnt good time for him to date anyone. In 2014 he said he had only gone out on few dates so obviously hes not opposed to dating, i met him on online dating site. I think he developed feelings alot stronger and faster then he expected and he wasnt mentally or emotionlly ready for them so he pulled away. If this is the case is there a chance of getting back together? Do i need to wait longer then month to reach out to him? I did point out to him alot on text that he didnt need to be afraid of his feelings or fear that i would hurt him be ause i felt the same way about him…he told me he wanted forever w me multiple times. Help!

    • admin
      February 16, 2015 | 9:40 pm

      Sure you do!

      I think a month is perfect for this.

  27. Lily
    February 10, 2015 | 10:03 pm

    I text my ex with a nice friendly message and now I heard he thinks I want to get back with him just because I text him once.

    • admin
      February 11, 2015 | 1:59 pm

      He thinks highly of himself doesn’t he?

      Though you do want him back, right?


      • lily
        February 11, 2015 | 9:54 pm

        He does. I do but for him think that is disturbing. I want him back but its not like I really need him in order to live. I kind of knew he would be like that so I waited for a little bit more then a month to text him. We have a class together and he sits behind me. I act all causal so I don’t know where he is getting this from. How do I text him now that he “thinks” that I want him back?

  28. Lizzy
    February 10, 2015 | 3:12 am

    My (ex) boyfriend broke up with me three days ago. He told me that he’s not in love with me anymore and he doesn’t think he ever was. He said if we never talk again, he will be okay with that. He’s done this three times before and I always run crying to him and begging him and we end up together again. However, I haven’t reached out to him this time but neither has he. Also, we don’t see eachother because we don’t work near eachother and we are no longer in college (where we met). Would the NC rule still work? He said he wouldn’t care if we didn’t keep in contact and he hasn’t tried to which shows that he truly doesn’t care. Doesn’t it? Would not contacting him truly get him to actually contact me?

    • admin
      February 10, 2015 | 4:00 pm

      Yes, NC can still work.

  29. emma
    February 9, 2015 | 8:53 pm

    Hi ok so me and my boyfriend broke up we had been together for 6 months he was the first person ive ever loved and my first kiss i broke up with him because i felt he didn’t love me anymore and i didn’t want to keep him held in a relationship that he didn’t want to be in.
    so here is the thing i dont think i will ever get him back but i miss him and really want him back we talk often only if i text him first and in a way we are kind of friends but the other day i asked him if he would kiss me again and he agreed you know kind of a this is it kiss i was hoping it would spark some feelings again but im not sure if we should do you think i should please answer i haven’t yet but i really need advice on if i should
    Thanks emma

    • admin
      February 10, 2015 | 3:39 pm

      There is no such thing as a this is it kiss for guys…

      I don’t think guys think the same about kissing as girls..

      • emma
        February 10, 2015 | 8:07 pm

        so do you think i should? i really miss him

  30. ana
    February 9, 2015 | 1:41 am

    I was with my bf for about 9 months when I was raped by someone I knew. I don’t want to get into the whole story but basically the only reason o hung out with the person who did that to me was to protect my relationship because he was constantly harrassimg me, I didn’t want my bf to think I had something going on. So I lied to him when I told him where I went that day, unfortunately this ended badly and I tol my bf for support and instead was attacked. We have tried being together since it happened, but he was constantly breaking up with me and bringing up what happened to me, in turn he was hurting me more and more and was not allowing me to heal from what happened to me. We broke up about a week ago, and I want to give him space to heal as for me too. But do you think that’s even possible? The other problem is that even if I wanted to do the no contact time I can’t because he works with me. I only see him on the weekends though. I know this is a long shot based on the nature of our situation but really dont want what happened to me to tear us apart. Any advice would be appreciated.

  31. Emma
    February 9, 2015 | 12:20 am


    I really need help. I broke up with my boyfriend eight days ago, but I really regret it and I want him back. I broke up with him because I was angry because he never wants to go out and do anything, all we do is stay inside watching netflix etc. So well, I finally got him to go to the movies with me but I could feel that he really didn’t want to go, so I got upset, REALLY upset and said that maybe we shouldn’t see each other anymore. And now I feel like this was a huuuge and stupid mistake, but still, I was upset with other things with him, but broke up with him just cause he didn’t want to go the movies.

    Anyway, I apologized to him and told him that I loved him and want him back. But he only says that he doesn’t know if he wants that. I’ve written so long messages and even gotten angry with him… but he rarely responds. What should I do? Do you Think there’s a way for us to get back togehter? He has told me that he is not over me, but he’s not sure he wants to be with me.

    Should i ignore him? Though I feel like why should I ignore him if we only broke up because of a stupid fight… I just want to talk to him..

    Please help!!


    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 4:48 pm

      Do you think if you talked to him he would come back at this stage?

      • Emma
        February 9, 2015 | 4:56 pm

        I’m not sure. Maybe… I’ve at least tried to so I maybe I should leave him alone for a week or so?

        Thing is, and my ex knows this, I get very angry and upset because of my birth control pills that he kind of forced me to take. And I am going to change to other pills.

        But seriously, how can he be mad at me because of that?

        • admin
          February 10, 2015 | 3:21 pm

          He probably doesn’t understand really how birth control pills can make women…

          I do though so I understand exactly what your coming from.

          • Emma
            February 11, 2015 | 8:48 pm

            Yeah, I guess. I am going to try to talk to him one last time. And tell him that I changed pills, hopefully he’ll want to meet up.

            Weird thing is, he keeps contacting me, but then ignores me. Like he wants to talk to me, but then decides that he doesn’t want to.

  32. catia
    February 8, 2015 | 12:30 am

    I never did nc fully or properly, which was a mistake, but we have done periods of texting and then not. It seems that after every 2-3 week span of not texting, I’m the one who always initiates. He responds positively (asks how my week is or tells me about his new job…. which is in a totally different country, so I’m not sure that’s necessarily a good thing that he’s so excited to tell me this!)– but it makes me wonder if he’d ever reach out had I not texted him first. Sometimes it feels like he’s just being nice/polite even though he gives lots of details. Or maybe I’m just being paranoid and over-analytical… which is very probable!

    I do know that I haven’t done a good job at ending the convos first, so sometimes he doesn’t respond.. and that makes me feel like I’m totally chasing him. So I’ve decided to sort of “start over” and do better this time, following your text strategies step by step. Can this be done effectively even if we’ve been chatting on and off the whole time?

    And as far as the FIRST contact text… since I’m pretty sure he’ll respond, I was thinking of sort of making it a mixture of a memory/saw this and it reminded me of you. Aka, saying I’m at this coffee shop we went to together and It gave me deja vu of that week (it was SB but we both stayed home and just did fun random stuff together…) The only thing is, later that night was the first time I told him “back” that I loved him. I obviously wouldn’t say that and it honestly wasn’t even the reason I chose this event, it was jsut a week full of great memories! But I’d bet he’ll remember that part tied in there; can I still use this or too risky?? My reason for not choosing another memory is bc immediately after the breakup I was all crazy (sweet, but crazy) and tried to remind him of literally every amazing memory we ever had together and I don’t want to remind him of that desperate side of me again by doubling up on a memory! And while i’m here, do people associate deja vu with a feeling?? Haha, because I definitely do… that’s why I thought of it in the first place, less about the events of the week but the feelings… it felt exciting just remembering! but if that’s not normal or something you can relay to someone else maybe I better choose something else.

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 4:14 pm

      Ok, no problem.

      You will just have to find another way to fascinate him.

      • cm
        February 10, 2015 | 1:55 am

        Yikes, okay.. Do you suggest any certain time period for nc to last, since we’ve been in contact on a few weeks/off a few, since the breakup?

        ONE MORE question about First contact text, can you help me with it?! So after this text, I THINK he will say “How’ve you been” or “How’s the new job?” (he knows I just started 2 wks ago). If he does, I know not to start a convo right away.. BUT do I wait 2 days and THEN pick up from there and answer his questions/segway into a convo, or do I just not answer them and start fresh with my own new (memory) text? And how would I bow out nicely and pick it up again–do I acknowledge the questions as I’m bowing out or 2 days later as I’m answering again? I’m guessing I shouldn’t say “sorry I never answered that” ha, can you maybe help me out with this?

        Thank you so much!!

        • admin
          February 10, 2015 | 3:57 pm

          No, I would do this.

          “Works been great… speaking of work I have to go to a meeting. Rain check?”

          Then you wait two days and message him again.

          • catia
            February 10, 2015 | 10:42 pm

            PERFECT, THANK YOU!

  33. sara
    February 7, 2015 | 11:24 pm

    hey ive met my exboyfriend online a year and a half ago from the first conversation he was all into me sayin that he loves me and how much he had been lookin for someone like me ( well we have almost everything in common music and stuff ) we both been hurted so much before too but i always thought no one could ever ;love someone from the first conversation right ??? but it turned out that he rlly did deeply loved me i wasnt tellin him i love u too or anything but ive always felt that i need what he is giving me (total understanding gentleness and just pure love ) then his brother sent me a friend request on facebook he was so funny and sexy i felt that rush towards him when my ex saw that we became friends on fb he told me thats my brother take care of him and stuff he always add girls from my profile i thought he was just sayin this to keep me away from his brother at first and kept talkin to them both i liked his brother but couldnt leave some one loves me so much but then his brother turned out to be strange i still dont get him till now ( talks about sex all the time no matter how many times i ask him to stop and tell him we r just friends and im his brother friend ) always horny to the point that he turns me on when i even dont want to i dont know i was just attracted to them both honestly and because i have trusting issues anyways i said my ex cant be that kind and sweet too good to be true sometimes id go along with his brother some times id tell him off and be rational till he told me that he wont leave me alone and threatened me with out chats said that hes gna show them to my ex unless i meet him i was shocked and started to believe that he is mental and me too because i took part of this shit i told him ill meet u then u leave me alone for ever i met him he was so sweet funny attractive and shit andhe said that he loves me i got soooo confused we made out in the car and it didnt seem that i was forced or that i didnt like it i went home that day sobbing because i betrayed some one rlly loves me or at least sayin so then i stopped talkin to his brother and got close to my ex was always makin excuses because i didnt want to meet him till he said u have one week then we gotta see each other and we did and i liked him million times more and started to have strong feelings for him and my pain was gettin stronger because what ive done with his brother cant be undone we met like 4 times he rlly made me so happy and it felt like its real love during that time his brother would make me feel guilty about what ive done with him while still talkin to his brother tellin me that im a bitch wich i maybe because what ive done but i wanted to fix my mistakes and he never allowed me till one day my ex checked the chat history between me and his brother on facebook sadly all the chats that i tell him off and saying stay away from me were on skype and chats on fb were awful t o read then i lost my boyfriend i couldnt breath literally panicked i even cut myself lol ( now im a sick bitch ) but i just love him so much cant imagine him with another one he only replies to me every now and then and because i went to a rehab he has been kind of sweet for 2 days or so then transform again into an angry beast who hates me he is on and off i dont know what he wants anymore some times he says nice stuff like (the only reason im still talkin to u is that love could never be changed into hate )but other times he say ill never forget what uve done ur a cheater etc. i love him and id do anything for him pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase could he ever be with me again

    • sara
      February 7, 2015 | 11:40 pm

      im 21 my ex bf is 30 the brother is 23 if this is helpful by any means !!

      • sara
        February 9, 2015 | 3:08 pm

        and maybe u could plz delete my comment after replying id be grateful thanks

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 3:43 pm

      Hmm… Have you read some of the more relevant articles yet?

      • sara
        February 9, 2015 | 5:56 pm

        yea i did but needed a more specific opinion

        • sara
          February 9, 2015 | 6:02 pm

          well i dont now things r so complicated to be solved that way anyway thanks :)

  34. Bridie Sampson
    February 7, 2015 | 7:48 pm

    Hi Chris,
    I need someone’s advice.
    I have only been dating my ex for a month he used to really bug me as he used to let me down all the time for “work” one day enough was enough and I thought I would write down how I felt and my feelings and send to him, after I rung him and he declined the calls twice and ignored me the next day I finished it with him. I didn’t want to but I thought it was for the best. He still is ignoring me I tried asking him for a coffee and a talk but he didn’t reply! He was friends with his exs who cheated on him yet I told him my feelings and he cut all ties.
    Will he text me within a few weeks?? Or shall I just move on??? I really like him and really want another chance with him! When we were together we were perfect I just never knew when I was going to see him again and I paniked and thought he was stringing me along!
    Thankyou x

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 4:08 pm

      I think he will end up texting… BUT you would increase your chance by doing NC.

      • Bridie Sampson
        February 9, 2015 | 7:17 pm

        Okay thankyou so much, he has my stuff at his too? So again shall I wait then message him later after the nc period? X

  35. Lily
    February 7, 2015 | 1:34 am

    I text my ex and he reply who is this. I don’t know what to do.

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 3:56 pm

      Reply with what?

  36. MiMi
    February 6, 2015 | 5:18 pm

    My boyfriend and I split up last August. He broke things off with me and decided he never wanted to speak to me again. Two weeks later he had involved himself with a married woman. I left him alone until he began contacting me again. He sent 2 emails, several texts to see if our daughters could have a play date, and called me twice. Finally I caved and him and I reminisced. He told me he still loved me. I asked about the married woman and he informed me that she moved in with him and is now divorcing her husband. I still love this man and never intended a breakup. He is with her and still reaching out to me. We even had sex 2 weeks ago. I dislike him and her so much that I told her. She got mad with him and they patched things up. Now he’s back to not speaking to me again. I feel awful. Is this relationship too far gone?

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 3:48 pm

      Is this the same married woman that lives two hours away?

      Or was that another situation I answered today?

  37. MiMi
    February 6, 2015 | 4:46 pm

    My boyfriend and I split last August. He told me he never wanted to speak to me again. Almost 2 weeks after we split he started seeing a married woman. She lived about 2 hours away and has now relocated to our area. She is going through the divorce process, they live together, and are obviously in a relationship. Even though I haven’t been in touch with him he has called twice, text me numerous times, and even showed up at my home on my birthday. Finally I responded 2 weeks ago after months of him contacting me. He told me he still loved me and is still in love with me. He said he’s not happy with her, just at peace. Peace is something we rarely had. We had sex. I hate the idea of this other girl so much that I told her. Now he is back to not speaking to me…again. At this point I’m disappointed in myself. I should have never slept with him. I still love and miss him. Why is he cutting me off again? Was he only interested in sex?

    • admin
      February 9, 2015 | 3:46 pm

      So, he is two hours away from him?

  38. Lupen
    February 6, 2015 | 11:10 am

    My boyfriend broke up with me a month ago out of the blue. Last time he spoke to me exept that was about five months ago. i havnt talked to him for three days and im trying the NC. Since we broke up ive… kinda hurt him a bit… i was just mad because he had no reason whatsoever to break up with me!! he didnt say why and it just happened. I still want him back tho. help??

    • admin
      February 6, 2015 | 2:37 pm

      How have you “kind of hurt him?”

  39. shubhali
    February 6, 2015 | 7:46 am

    aftr a month i am texting him abt our old memories sweet good Morning msgs… but he is not rplyng
    wht to do???

    ha i havn’t texted any genral msg… i was even willing to cal him
    but not sure he’ll pik it or not… :( plz help

  40. Lily
    February 6, 2015 | 1:33 am

    When you text your ex for the very first time what kind of things can you bring up? Like stuff that they used to like and whatever, memories about them? The example kind of confuses me.

    • admin
      February 6, 2015 | 2:22 pm

      Usually you want to build things up a bit more before you do that.

      When you first bring up you want to bring up positive memories but nothing controversial (like the breakup.)

  41. aj
    February 5, 2015 | 8:38 pm

    My ex and i ended our relationship pretty much deciding to be friends weighting more so on his side. Right now i havent so much applied the NCR but have been very short with him in a polite way and responding in a non timey manner. Thing is idk if i can just cut him off because i had already done this. Will what im doing still be effective? I really want him to realize the things he did wrong and that i am worth all the things i feel i deserve. Since ive been doing this he always texts and now is calling showing up at places close to where i am. Whats your advice?

    • admin
      February 6, 2015 | 2:11 pm

      Well, you kind of can’t half do the no contact rule…

      So… ya.

  42. MissT
    February 5, 2015 | 10:50 am

    hello Chris
    i broke up with my ex boyfriend about 2 and half months ago and i did no contact for 30days and i started following your steps of texting him about a month ago.The good thing is he does reply my texts positively but the problem is everytym i send a text about our memories and great tyms we had he doesnt respond no matter which angle i come from but he does respond to general staff well.What should i do?

  43. Tony
    February 5, 2015 | 12:39 am

    My girlfriend and I were very happy early this year for me but she went to the hospital and the doctor told her she had a complicated pregnancy It condition is called ectopic pregnancy.So she told her mum and they remove it same day.she didn’t talk to me and I tried call her that same day but she didn’t pick my call so I leave for 3 weeks and called and we talk but I didn’t mention it and she didn’t too.But since them if I didn’t check on her she won’t bother but when I do she will respond.Now am confused what should I do.I want to know if I should stop contacting her,I don’t know if we are still dating or not.She never Check on me but when I do,She will respond.Kindly advice

    • admin
      February 5, 2015 | 3:28 pm

      Please check out my other site, Ex Girlfriend Recovery. Its more applicable to your situation than this one.

  44. lesleigh
    February 4, 2015 | 3:15 pm

    Hi Chris
    My boyfriend broke up with me 4 days ago.we were together 4 years.we had a huge argument and I said horrible things out of anger. I went to his place of work begging for forgiveness.after that I have not heard anything all he could say was its over. I miss him terribly and there are times when I wanna text him to tell him how much I miss you think he will ever come back to me?

    • admin
      February 5, 2015 | 3:03 pm

      You should do NC and if you keep doing what you are doing…. no

      Like I said go into NC.

  45. Jay
    February 4, 2015 | 7:07 am

    Hi Christ!
    I was reading this but still confuse.
    I broke off with him 3days ago (he could not be more commit to me) and start to go NC immediatly after I told him and his respond was he understand and that’s the end. Part of me knows that we will still be friend. I think one of my mistake is that it was not the first time i told him that and we always got back together with the same situation.

    So i decided to cut him off but part of me still wants him back. And now he text me and ask how am i doing? What should i do? Should i still follow NC rules and reply him after 30days? Or should I reply back in few hours? What should i do?

    • admin
      February 4, 2015 | 2:27 pm

      Lol its chris not christ!

      Though if you think I am the son of god I am cool with that ;) .

      Yes, follow the NC rules.

      • Jay
        February 5, 2015 | 7:24 am

        Lol sorry about the mistake. But thank you!

  46. MJ
    February 4, 2015 | 2:42 am

    Hi Chris. My boyfriend and I broke up 3 days ago. I was terribly shocked since we did not have any issues before that would lead to break up. We have been together for 2 years and it was “you and me against the world” relationship. our families are against us because we are second cousins. we have been through ups and downs despite our families trying to stop our relationship. His family is trying to blackmail him by disowning him or giving their company to charity. He’s pressured by his parents to be like this and like that. Not only for the church but for the company as well. We cried and begged for their approval. I mean, this is not a typical love story. He is my crush and eventually, we fell inlove. He is just the man I prayed for. All the things I want in a guy, it was him! We both gave our utmost effort and loved each other sincerely. What makes it difficult is that we are churchmates. I sing and play piano, he plays guitar. I see him every weekends. Now, i do not know what to do. He is not the typical guy. He is too sweet, tame and good to be true. He never cheated on me. He never failed to do romantic stuffs. He texts and updates me every now and then. I mean, he is perfect for me. Unfortunately, I was not able to appreciate him doing those stuff. Last December 2014, I got attached with other guy and started ignoring my boyfriend. So I lost attraction to him. But this January 2015, I realized that I still love him. He is my home. No matter what I do, I always come back to him. :(

    What will I do now? I’m lost. He says he does not love me anymore, that he can’t see his future with me. All those things he said were contrary do the things he kept on saying for the time we were together. I do not know if he’s trying to hurt me intentionally for me to give up. My friends and relatives could not believe the reasons he said. It’s impossible and too shallow. Before, he cannot say “no” to me. I’m his everything. But, things changed 360 degrees!

    What will I do? He’s just different and I do not know whether to believe his reasons of breaking up because I know he is never like that or just to simply give. But it just feels so weird. I know there’s something more to it. Help me :(

    • admin
      February 4, 2015 | 2:23 pm

      What was his reason for the breakup exactly?

      • MJ
        February 6, 2015 | 12:11 am

        He keeps on saying that he does not love me anymore, that he can’t sacrifice his future because of me (his reputation for the company and church might be affected if the people will know his in a relationship with his second cousin). He even said I’m not a girlfriend material (it’s the first time). I mean, everything he said was the complete opposite of what he keeps on saying for 2 years. I just could not believe it. I can see in his eyes, he’s lying and I know there’s a big reason to it. I just do not know whether to hold on or simply give up :( I just love him

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