What Are Your Chances of Getting Your ExBoyfriend Back

This Is How You Should Contact Your Ex Boyfriend

Contacting an ex boyfriend can be tricky. This is especially true if you have plans on getting him back. Look at this page as your ultimate guide for deciding how you should contact your ex. If you don’t already know, I put this site together with one ultimate goal, to create the best resource for women who want to get their ex boyfriends back. This page is going to look at every single aspect of how someone should be contacting their ex. We will weigh the pros and cons of every single method and I will show you which method the experts recommend.

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Contacting An Ex

(To learn more about how to properly contact your ex boyfriend please check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.)


Alright, lets jump right in to this. I do feel compelled to mention that most women make a serious mistake when they want to contact their ex boyfriend. The average woman who really wants their ex back becomes what I like to call a text gnat. Have you ever had a gnat fly around your head? No matter how many times you swat at it, it just doesn’t seem to leave you alone. I hope you are seeing the analogy here, you are the gnat. Every time you text him he is probably rolling his eyes, getting angry or getting you angry. In short, texting him like a mad woman isn’t a smart idea.

In fact, right after a breakup (especially if he broke up with you) he is expecting you to beg for him back. He is expecting you to text or call him like crazy. So, I am going to recommend that you refuse to contact him after a certain amount of time, 30 days to be exact (you learn that in the articles I recommended above.) So, instead of him rolling his eyes every time he sees your name in caller I.D.. His whole world will have shifted and he is going to be wondering why you aren’t begging for him back.

It’s amazing what a bit of silence will do for you!


  • Do not even think to contact your ex boyfriend until 30 days of silence are up.
  • Doing this will cause him to wonder why you aren’t begging for him back.

Ways To Contact Your Ex Boyfriend

(To learn more about the different ways to contact your ex please check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.)

contact image

Ok, there are a lot of different ways you can contact someone you used to have a relationship with. Some of them are extremely good and some of them aren’t. This section is going to explore the three of the most popular methods that ex girlfriends use to contact their ex boyfriends.

Calling Via Phone

Ah yes, the dreaded phone call. Phone calls are interesting because they can be used effectively and you can have great success with them. However, it isn’t a matter of just picking up the phone, calling up your ex and gushing your heart out to them. No, calling on the phone has to be done in a specific way in order to maximize your success (which I will outline later.) Lets look at some of the pros and cons of calling on the phone.

Pros- Things can get emotional in a good way!, You can get a definitive answer anytime you ask an important question., You can actually hear your significant others voice.

Cons- Things can get emotional in a bad way., Calling doesn’t give you time to think, anytime they ask you a question you have to answer quickly., It is easy to get into an argument again., Higher chance of getting into a fight.

Writing A Letter

Writing a letter is an interesting tactic for first contact. I do know that a few experts who sell their own products recommend this but if I am being completely honest I am not a fan of this tactic at all. Basically how this works is that you write a letter professing your undying love for your ex and how you would like to reconnect. The biggest problem I have with this method is the fact that if you literally went through the 30 day no contact period, without contacting your ex once, it might seem a little creepy if he opens his door to find a letter from you professing your undying love.

Pros- If your ex is into letters this tactic might very well work.

Cons- Can be very creepy if done incorrectly, There is no way to get an immediate response like with calling or texting, After a no contact period writing a letter professing your love may actually hurt you more than help you.

Writing A Text Message

It just seems like texting came out of nowhere. Pretty much 90% of the people who have a cell phone all utilize text messaging. Text messages are sacred to everybody. Have you ever tried to take one of your friends phones and read their text messages in front of them. Trust me, they get either uncomfortable or very angry. This can give you a distinct advantage when texting your ex. They will take your texts seriously and they probably won’t be shared with anybody. It is a way that you can talk to your ex in a very personal way without actually being out with them one on one physically.

Pros- Texting is very intimate, ability to share cute pictures, It is impossible to raise your voice through a text message, you can actually think before you send anything.

Cons- Honestly I can’t think of any.

(Special Instructions On Texting- Text messaging an ex boyfriend is complex. While I would love nothing more than to write a million words on the topic I don’t have the time or patience for that so what I am going to do for you is recommend that you check out my book, The Texting Bible if you are interested in learning how the entire process works.)

3 Steps To Correctly Contact Your Ex

(For more in-depth information on the 3 steps to contacting your ex check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.)

right way

Alright, in this section I am going to briefly describe the “game plan” for contacting your ex. In no way is this set in stone. However, your best chance of getting him back could very well be the strategy I describe here. I also do want to point out that all I am going to talk about here are the bare essentials. I am not going to go into what you should be saying when you contact him, I wrote an entire page for that.

Step 1: Implement the No Contact Rule. Basically for 30 days you cannot talk to your ex via texting, calling, facebooking, googling, etc. If you screw up and contact him before the 30 days is up then you have to start all over from day 1.

Step 2: After your 30 days are up you are ready to make first contact. The best way to make first contact in my opinion is via a text message. However, you need to make this text message so interesting and fascinating that it will be impossible for him not to respond. That is the way you need to treat this first text. Again, I am not going to give examples here. The page I talked about above has plenty and teaches you how to correctly communicate with your ex via a text message.

Step 3: Once you have reached the ideal place in your communication you are going to ask for a hangout or small meet up if he hasn’t already suggested it. Again, a lot has to happen between step 2 and step 3 and you are going to have to read this page for that. However, you aren’t going to ask for the hang out via a text message you are going to ask for it via a phone call. This is the correct way to use a phone call, after you have already established some rapport with each other. Again, if you want to know what to say during this call you are going to have to visit the page I keep telling you to go read, hint hint!


Written by EBR Teamate

Chris Seiter

634 thoughts on “This Is How You Should Contact Your Ex Boyfriend”

  1. Euni

    December 14, 2017 at 2:45 am

    Hi.am on my nc now.it’s 7days gone.i realy begged him after the breakup but couldn’t pick up my calls and texts.i really want him and am worried the begging drew him so far away that the nc won’t work.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 15, 2017 at 3:55 pm

  2. Mary Johnson

    December 8, 2017 at 6:35 am

    Hi I was in the NC rule for 64 days I decided to text my ex bf for his bday and he replied with 10min and said thank you. Then after 15 days again I decided to text him again and said hello,but this time there was no reply. What went wrong,or what should I do now?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 11, 2017 at 9:59 am

  3. Daisy Bigas

    November 5, 2017 at 7:14 am

    I am on my 17 days of NC
    One of my old friend suggested me to contact my ex-boyfriend and be sweet and caring to him like what he liked me before but I told her that I am doing the No contact rule and I don’t want to broke and change my plan.

    My question is Do I need to do her advice?or better to stay to the NC rule?
    Thank you in advance

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 6, 2017 at 10:31 am

      Hi Daisy,

      Stay in nc..how much are you improving yourself and how active are you in posting?

  4. Eileen

    November 3, 2017 at 4:51 am

    I am in my day 24 of no contact. My first 2 weeks of no contact my Ex has been calling me 2-3x a day. He will also text me if I don’t reply. I never answered either his text or phone calls. He tried to call me many times. Last week at 6am as I was locking my front door I heard a call from my pocket, as soon as I saw it i hang up. Omg, I butt dialed my ex .. I was very disciplined about the NC rule and all of a sudden this happened. I think bc the night before I was debating whether I should delete his # on my phone list or not. I need your help!! Is this considered as breaking no contact a butt dial or accidental dial? Pls help! This happens to me all the time even with friends Accidental dialing. Thank you for your reply!! I am considering on texting him next wk day 30 will end next week. Pls help me!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 4, 2017 at 12:57 am

      Hi Eileen,
      nope, it’s not because you hang up.

  5. Carol

    October 30, 2017 at 8:57 am

    Hi, I would like to ask about my currect NC. I was in NC for 2 weeks then I had to bring my ex the money back, which I was owning to him, we saw each other 10 min talked just about work and I told I go for bussines trip and we agreed we could go out after I come back, he wrote me that day messege after few hours: “Was nice to see you, see you after you return.” I did not reply but my question is shall I continue from that day 30 days NC, can I change to 21 days NC since that day or can I count those two weeks in no contact before we met as not broken rule?

    Many thanks in advance. Caroline

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 1, 2017 at 3:25 pm

      Hi Carol,

      How much did you improve yourself during those two weeks and how active were you in posting?

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