7 Signs That Your Ex Wants You Back (Based On Case Studies)

When it comes to looking for signs that your ex wants you back I’m sure you’ve read a lot.

But, if you’re anything like me you’re probably left a little underwhelmed by what’s out there.

Often, I find that many of my peers make bold claims about “this or that” being a sign that an ex may want you back.

Unfortunately, they don’t have any type of proof to back up those claims.

I got tired of that so I decided to do some actual research and craft a guide that covered the actual signs that an ex wants you back.

And the best part is that this page is entirely predicated on real life examples of exes who have wanted their significant others back.

Are you ready?

The 7 Signs That Your Ex May Want You Back (Based On Real Life)

7 signs that your ex wants you back

As stated above, I wrote this guide with a clear goal in mind.

Every sign that I am about to talk to you about is based on the real life experience of someone who has gotten their exes back.

What’s even better is that I’m not just going to tell you the sign but I am going to provide proof so that you can see and many times hear from the person that experienced that sign.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Below are all of the signs that an ex wants you back,

  1. Dramatic mood swings from positive to negative and back to positive again
  2. They are very responsive to the first text after a period of no contact
  3. They want to rush the process
  4. They reach out to you more than you reach out to them
  5. They can use a form of reverse psychology
  6. They become very jealous
  7. They start wanting to plan ahead for the future

Lets take a moment and dive a little more in-depth on these signs.

1. They Have Dramatic Mood Swings From Positive To Negative and Back To Positive Again

mood swings from positive to negative

Anyone who is familiar with my work on Ex Boyfriend Recovery knows I talk about “the pendulum” a lot.

The Pendulum (in this context): Is basically when a human being moves from one end of the “emotion” spectrum to the other and repeats the process several times.

Sound familiar?

Not only do people suffering from a breakup experience this phenomenon but exes who actually want you back experience it as well.

In order to understand why we must first talk a little about the science of breakups and how the brain processes them.

(If you aren’t the “science” type don’t worry. I’m not either but I promise this is super interesting and important to know.)

A few years ago researchers studying the brain of individuals going through a breakup found something fascinating.

When we experience the loss of a romantic partner we may actually experience cravings for that person very similar to a drug addict looking for a fix.

In other words, if an ex is trying to get you back they will probably act erratically and display these crazy mood swings.

Now, I know what you are thinking.

“Ok, that’s all very well and good but where’s the proof?”

The Case Study Of Exes Who Displayed Crazy Mood Swings

So, the first case study that I’d like to introduce to you today is actually a series of case studies.

One of my favorite things that to do on Ex Boyfriend Recovery is interacting with people in our Private Facebook Group.

It’s really cool because not only do I get to help people on a more personal level but I also get a lot of great information about the psychology behind “wanting an ex back.”

This was really hit home during an interview I did with a success story out of that  very Facebook Group.

About 12 minutes into the interview you can see us talking about the hundreds (now thousands) of people in the group who are going through incredibly difficult times.

You’ll notice we were talking about this exact idea of the “pendulum swings” where a mood shifts from one end of the spectrum to the other and how common this behavior is.

Now, here’s the important thing to note.

Every single person in my Private Facebook Group wants their ex back.

Hence, my statement at the beginning of this section about this being a series of case studies.

2. They Are Very Responsive To The First Text After A Period Of No Contact

responsive after the first contact

This one might need a little explanation.

If you aren’t already familiar with what the no contact rule is I suggest you read my epic guide on it. It’s a bit long but in my opinion it’s the most comprehensive guide online right now.

But for those of you who want a quick crash course,

The No Contact Rule = A Period Of Time Where You Ignore Your Ex

Now, I don’t want to go too in depth on it here since this article is about looking at the signs an ex wants you back and not about the no contact rule but we are pretty darn fond of the no contact rule.

After all, it’s yielded an insane amount of success stories and is a strategy that is present in almost every one of our success stories.

It’s kind of a big deal.

So, where am I going with this?

Well, we’ve noticed that a lot of our clients’ exes are very responsive during the first contact they have with their ex after a period of no contact.

Almost as if to say,

“Thank god… they finally contacted me. I was worried they forgot about me forever.”

Now, it isn’t the “be all, end all” but it’s certainly significant enough to not ignore.

The Case Study Of An Ex Who Was Super Responsive After A Period Of No Contact

For this one I’d like to bring in Jessy!

If you didn’t already know Jessy actually used our program to not only get her ex back but is now married to him.

She ended up agreeing to be interviewed by me so that I could see exactly what she did to win him back.

Well, after re-watching the interview I couldn’t help but notice that she yielded an amazing reaction to her first contact text message to him after the no contact rule.

Here’s the interview of us talking about it,

Notice how she talks about putting a lot of thought behind the text message that she sent to her ex and how she tapped into a happy memory.

Anyways, she sends the text and then has a meeting to go into at work and when she gets out of the meeting and looks at her phone she has a flood of text messages from him on her phone.

Bear in mind, that they get married a few months after this moment.

3. They want to rush the process

they want to rush the process

We live in the “now” age.

I’ve been recently watching Netflix’s “A Series of Unfortunate Events” which I’ll admit is aimed more towards kids than adults but I’m allowed to be a kid sometimes.

Anyways, there’s a character in the show that is obsessed with what’s “In” and what’s “Out.”

Basically, this character wants to be a part of all the “In” trends.

It’s funny to me because I am sure the author who wrote the books was making a commentary on how our society has become.

Now only is it so obsessed with what’s “IN” and “OUT” but I believe it’s also obsessed with “NOW.”

We want answers as soon as possible, right?

Before back in the Golden Age of the internet you used to have to perform a Google search on a big clunky computer.

Now we have all of these smart phones.

In other words, you can get answers sooner.

So, where am I going with this?

Well, if you find that your ex is trying to rush everything during the “courtship ritual” it might be a sign that they want you back.

the courtship ritual

Case Study Of Exes Who Rushed The Process

Can you do me a favor?

Can you take a look at this picture for me?

Now, without context this looks like a general success story and we have a lot of them scattered throughout this website.

But with context this success story can actually teach you something.

You see, this woman’s ex came back to her in record time. In fact, I think it might be the fastest success story we’ve ever had.

It’s pretty well known that it takes longer than 3 months to get an ex back if you are trying.

But this woman’s ex came back to her in days.

It was almost as if he was thinking,

“I’m just going to break up with her and move on with my life”

Only to immediately regret that decision and think,

“What have I done? I need to get her back as soon as possible.”

It’s a good sign if you see your ex consistently trying to rush the courtship ritual.

4. They Reach Out To You More That You Reach Out To Them

they reach out to you more than you do to them

I think one of the things that sets Ex Boyfriend Recovery apart from some of our competitors is the fact that we encourage our clients to take detailed notes throughout the process.

In fact, there have been a lot of times where I have mentioned that it is a good idea to keep a tally of the amount of text messages your ex has sent to you and how many you have sent back.

We’ve even had some people on our Private Facebook Group kick this idea into overdrive and detail everything.

We like recommending this since we feel sometimes some of the people we work with are too close to their situation to make impartial decisions.

However, if you map things out you can look at it from a very logical perspective and make the best decision without the blinders on.

Anyways, we noticed that as more and more of our clients started doing this the clients that tended to get their exes back were the ones with exes that reached out more to them than they reached out in return.

Interesting!

I feel a case study coming on.

The Case Study Of The Ex Who Can’t Stop Texting

I’m big on investment.

Now, just so we are clear I don’t mean investment from a monetary perspective. No, I’m talking about investment from a texting perspective.

It makes sense that an ex who texts you more than you text them is going to be more invested into a conversation than you, right?

Well, that was certainly the case for our client below,

I want you to notice how she started out kind of rough.

He wasn’t texting her at all so she had to text him first to open the lines of communication but once they were open…..

Watch out because he wouldn’t stop texting her.

This is a very good sign!

5. They Use A Form Of Reverse Psychology

they use reverse psychology

No one really talks about this one and if I am being totally honest I would have never guessed it was a sign an ex would exhibit if I wasn’t looking specifically for case studies.

And yet there it is.

Staring us all right in the face.

So, how does it work?

Well, in order to fully grasp this we have to understand how people tend to operate.

It’s my opinion that we are all gods in our own minds.

We all need to feel wanted and loved by our significant others to feel satisfaction with our relationships. But what happens when we think our significant other no longer wants or loves us?

Well, that’s when we start to try to do things gain that status back.

Some will fight or scream…

Others will become distant as if to say, “you need to prove yourself to me.”

And every once in a while you’ll get someone who decides to use reverse psychology. To attempt to make you feel as if they don’t love or want you anymore.

Of course, they do this with the full intention of trying to make you chase them.

The Case Study Of An Ex Who Used Reverse Psychology

Like I said at the beginning of this particular sign. I wouldn’t even know this was a “sign” if it wasn’t for a case study.

It turns out that, that case study was an interview I did with Mary, the woman who got her ex to unblock her and eventually beg for her back.

Around the 7 minute mark you’ll hear her talk about what happened when her ex reached out to her,

Her ex said some really interesting things to her,

“I need to bring your stuff back to you.”

“It looks like you’ve moved on.”

“Have a nice life”

Now, if you take all of these things at face value it appears as if her ex boyfriend was implying that she has moved on and that he was going to do the same.

Bear in mind, he really wants her back.

How do I know?

Because he literally told her he wanted her back AFTER THEY GOT BACK TOGETHER!

So, what is going on here?

Why would her ex say these things if they weren’t true?

It’s bait.

Consider the graphic below,

When you go fishing how do you catch a fish?

Do you just throw your fishing line into the water and hope for the best?

No, often you have to outfit the fishing line with some type of bait to attract a fish into biting.

Well, in Mary’s case her ex was using these reverse psychology statement to bait her into showing some type of interest. You see, she was following my advice and utilizing the no contact rule which taps into a psychological theory called reactance.

Reactance: When someones behavior freedoms get threatened they react in a way to try to get that freedom back

So, in Mary’s case by ignoring her ex by using the no contact rule it prompted a reaction from her ex to get that freedom of talking to her back.

It just so happened that, that reaction was reverse psychology.

6. They Become Very Jealous

This is a big sign that your ex wants you back and I don’t think it’s rocket science.

Jealousy almost always imply that feelings are involved.

Really, just sit for a moment and try to think of an example where jealousy doesn’t involve feelings of some type.

I’ll give you a few basic examples.

I grow jealous when my readers prefer another breakup expert over me.

Feelings Involved = “Why don’t you like me???”

I grow jealous when I look at pictures of my wife and her ex boyfriends from years ago.

Feelings Involved = “I’m just nuts ok…”

Here’s my point.

If you are going on a date after your breakup and you notice your ex starts exhibiting the signs of jealousy that may be a sign that he wants you back.

But the proof is in the pudding as they say so let’s look at a case study to prove this.

The Case Study Of An Ex Who Became Jealous

Anyone who knows me really well knows I am a total nerd when it comes to Buffy The Vampire Slayer (don’t hate.)

Anyways, a few years ago, when I had first started my Private Facebook Group a member joined named Sarah Michelle. Of course, me being the Buffy fanatic I am I took to calling her “Buffy” after Sarah Michell Gellar who actually played Buffy

(I’m weird, I know.)

I'm weird

Anyways, the Sarah Michelle in our Private Facebook Group turned out to be a wiz when it came to making her ex want her back because not only did she get him back once but after he broke up with her again he came back once he saw she was dating someone new.

You can tell her hear the whole story in this interview I did with her,

I found it fascinating how after the second breakup her ex wanted nothing to do with her UNTIL she started dating someone new.

It’s almost like,

“Oh my goodness, someone else has her so I have to have her.”

This is jealousy at it’s finest.

And now that I think about it, it is also reactance at work.

7. They Start Wanting To Plan Ahead For The Future

they plan for the future

Throughout Ex Boyfriend Recovery you might notice me talking about this concept of “future pacing.”

Sound familiar?

No?

Well, let me give you some context. Most of the clients that I work with are trying everything they can to get their exes back.

Therefore, a lot of what I try to teach them is how to naturally build an attraction with an individual and one of the best ways to do that is to “future pace” in a conversation.

This is where you imagine a potential future together with them.

I’ll give you an example.

Let’s say you are talking to your ex and somewhere in a conversation with them you make this comment,

“Wouldn’t it be great to go to Paris?”

Upon hearing this your ex immediately imagines you and them together in Paris.

Even though this is all happening subconsciously your ex is reframing how they view you in their head.

Well, it turns out that “future pacing” works both way .

If your ex subtly slips in “potential futures” together that is a really good sign.

The Case Study Of The Ex Who Future Paced

I have a great case study for this one.

I draw a lot upon our Private Facebook Group but that tends to be where we have the most success stories happening because that’s where we spend most of our time interacting with our audience.

Also, I coach exclusively out of the Private Facebook Group so that’s where people tend to get the very best advice.

A few months ago my wife was working with a woman in the group and this woman was super disappointed with how the process was going.

In fact, at one point her ex went as far as saying,

“There’s no way that I’m ever going to get married.”

Pretty strong words…

Anyways, after a series of interesting events her ex ended up saying this to her last week,

“I’m never getting married… except maybe to you. I’d marry you.”

Do you see what happened there?

He essentially future paced the woman in our group.

He is imagining a future with his ex where they get married. Now, he didn’t say it outright but these things are never that cut and dry.

Often we operate in that grey area of the human psyche.

Here’s the point.

He says this to her and then ultimately gets back with her.

Sources And Citations

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Written by EBR Teamate

Chris Seiter

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2818 Comments on "7 Signs That Your Ex Wants You Back (Based On Case Studies)"

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Sally
Guest

Hi I just need to ask one question, its the second time we broke up, year since we last broke up. He broke up with me and the reason is not as bad as last time he said the same things as last time “i want you back later i just need to be alone right now, don’t know what i want I still love you” that kills me… what to do? And can I get him back? Last time he came back in 2 weeks because i used no contact rule.

Jennifer Seiter
Editor

Hi Sally, The good news is you’ve gotten him back before so he’s not one of the stubborn ones that “don’t ever get back with exes.” Restart our process. Do the no contact rule for 21-30 days depending on where he’s at. Your going to have to raise your value because he’s not afraid to lose you. Go on dates with other men and do things that you love. (Don’t tell him about the dates unless he asks. If he does ask tell him (I went on a few dates but I wasn’t interested in anyone.)

Jennifer
Guest
Hi, so my ex and I have been apart for 3 weeks now. He said he needed space to work on himself and needed time to miss me and get the spark back as he was unhappy in the relationship aswell as in his life. I respected that and basically said I would wait for him. I done no contact for 2 weeks but last week I found out he had been messaging another girl, which is so unlike him I don’t understand it. Anyway I went mad and he said there was nothing in it and he’s not interested… Read more »
Meaghan
Guest
Will the NC thing work if we both agreed to do it? He broke up with me after we had a small fight (in my mind) and said he needed space. He reached out asking how I was after not talking for a week and then asked if we could keep in contact. I said I wasn’t ready to talk to him, and we said we’d talk in 2 months. We dated for 3.5 years and are each other’s first loves. It has been long distance for the last 10 months, and we both were unhappy with our individual lives,… Read more »
Meaghan
Guest

Me telling him that we should take two months and then texting him after a couple of weeks won’t look bad? I don’t want to look like I’m breaking my promise of giving him space.

Sapfo
Guest
Hello, Chris, Jennifer and every other member of the EBR team! I found this site randomly and I just followed all your articles on becoming UG, even though I was still in a relationship, but it made me feel very confident. Anyway, me and my boyfriend of almost 1 year broke up a week ago. He’s 24, I’m 22. He’s in another country for 1 month doing business, so that works in my favour while doing NC (I started immediately after we broke up). I had a jealousy strike and broke up with him before he left, then we discussed… Read more »
Jennifer Seiter
Editor

Thanks for following our site! I think you have a very good shot at getting him back. Your situation is unique and since you’ve gotten back together before I think you will be able to again. Your challenge will be keeping him and overcoming the jealously on both ends.

Sapfo Spyridakos
Guest

Hi, Jennifer, Chris and team! Everything was going fine, I’m still in NC and it seemed like he missed me but last night I went out with some guys he didn’t know and they uploaded a picture. He saw it and deleted me and my best friend from Facebook. Do you think I lost my chances? Should I give up?

Jennifer Seiter
Editor

No I don’t think you lost your chances at all! He’s showing emotion which means he still cares and that’s great. How many days do you have left of no contact?

Sapfo Spyridakos
Guest

My first text is supposed to be on 30th April, so about 2 weeks. He also deleted 2 of our pictures (there are still some left) and got off the “in a relationship” status. He’s saying things like “I’m better now that we broke up” which he didn’t before (to his friends, not me). The thing about the emotion is what I thought too because I’d do the same but I’m actually worried that he’s going to get over it and is starting to being better. Thank you for all your help either way, you are amazing!

Sapfo
Guest
Hello, Chris, Jennifer and everyone else on the team! So, I’m almost finishing NC (in a week). I’m improving me, I’m not worrying constantly about my ex, and I feel ready for the texting phase. But I had one question: I fall under the insecure category (I read your article about that), and I was wondering: should I skip the memory texts on days 5 & 6 and replace them with something else? Will I come off as clingy or should casually and with confidence send them? (if everything goes well and we get there in the first place) Thank… Read more »
Sapfo Spyridakos
Guest

I remember there was an “offer”, that you could get the book and also be in the Facebook group? I don’t remember exactly where I saw it or if it was limited time, am I mistaken? And which book was it, texting bible or ebr pro?
Thank you again!

Linda
Guest
He broke up with me aroudn 4 months ago, said he doesn’t see any future for us together. We’ve been on-and-off talking, initially he was initiating most of the contact… And then he started delaynig replies, he would reply 3 day later, week later, two weeks – each time still asking questions to keep the conversation going. I seriously don’t know what to think lol. During the time he would delay replies I finally decided to do no contact – 3 weeks. Too short?? Then I finally replied to his message and he took again a few days to reply.… Read more »
Linda
Guest

Well, I definitely dont feel comfortable putting them here.
Hm, I guess so! I guess for me at least it’s hard to work on building that excitement when the other side seems so… unresponsive in general. Is there something you would suggest? Give it a break for some time? Continue, but trying to work on more excitement?

Linda
Guest

Thank you! I’ll try to do that!

Genevieve
Guest
I’m in a bit of a confusing situation. I’m in the texting phase with my ex of 5 months, and when we first started talking again his texts were positive. He wanted to know how I was doing,and was responding right away. After that day, his responses became neutral (1-2 worded texts) and he would take ages to respond. I waited 5 days to text him again. Now I got him to respond positively lately, but he still takes a long time to answer. We use Facebook Messenger, and I know one of his pet peeves is when somebody doesn’t… Read more »
Genevieve
Guest
Unfortunately that didn’t work either. He is uncomfortable with phone conversations, and never typically answers them. Should I give it several days to contact him again? I think I may have to change the topics of interest… I guess you can say he is a narcissist as he is extremely intelligent and works out a lot to maintain his buff figure. He always used to ask me every time I would see him, “Babe! Did I get bigger?” I always found that adorable, but it also seems to be a very insecure part of him as he used to be… Read more »
Sylvie
Guest
Hey Chris, What if my ex and I haven’t talked for 4 months ( i’ve done complete no contact on him), and I’m not seeing any of these 7 signs from him, is all hope lost? As mentioned I’ve completely cut off contact with him about 4 months now, but he does like or react to things I post on facebook. I have posted photos of hobbies here and there, but my social media game is still very weak – i dont post often enough and not enough photos of myself. I need a game plan. Should I continue no… Read more »
Rochelle
Guest

Hi there! The NC works. 3 weeks of no contact with my ex since March 7, 2018. He first texted me with hi how are you, take the best of care, drive safely, he missed me. Do not be afraid to do this. It works and now we are back together.

Megan Sharp
Guest
My husband and I separated around 3 months ago. Been together for 10yrs, maffieed for 7. We have 3 kids together. You had moved onto someone else even got her name tattooed on himself. (He has my name too but took 5yrs together for him to get it. He had only been with her a few weeks) He has slept over, he has been the one ask if it’s ok and we have had sex together at least one week since we split. He has done the mood swings. One minute he is flirty with me, he is laughing with… Read more »
Megan Sharp
Guest
I have changed a lot about myself, the things he told me that made him walk out. I did the no contact…it was really working. He would text me out of the blue and it would start a general conversation. But I got sucked into quickly and that rule went out the window. I am making my plans for the future and trying to move on but then something holds me back. I still have my plans but I think I imagine them without him and it just gets me down. He sends me mixed signals all the time. He… Read more »
Samiya
Guest

I’m just tooo shattered I had breakup 5 days ago its because I talk to soo rudely with my bf I hurt him he said me we are but I know he was angry where ever I msg him he block me from every where than today I got request from his friend like on Instagram I didn’t acclt it than I saw we chat he put privacy like I’m unable too see his pictures I want him back pls help

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Samiya,

How many times have you broken up?

Samiya
Guest

I’m just tooo shattered I had breakup 5 days ago its because I talk to soo rudely with my bf I hurt him he said me we are but I know he was angry where ever I msg him he block me from every where than today I got request from his friend like on Instagram I didn’t acclt it than I saw we chat he put privacy like I’m unable too see his pictures I want him back pls help

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Samiya,

How many times have you broken up?

Galu
Guest
We dated for 9 mnths, were even thinking about marriage.. but I hurt him subconsciously by taking too long to say yes, and asking him repeatedly about his finances and gradually he started withdrawing. And sensing that I started fighting. He then said that he needs to step back, needs space.he started talking bare minimum but had sex with me a few times. After a month he said he loves me but cant see a future due to my temper tantrums. He said he will b in my life, he shall call, meet and talk to me, but we both… Read more »
Galu
Guest
We dated for 9 mnths, were even thinking about marriage.. but I hurt him subconsciously by taking too long to say yes, and asking him repeatedly about his finances and gradually he started withdrawing. And sensing that I started fighting. He then said that he needs to step back, needs space.he started talking bare minimum but had sex with me a few times. After a month he said he loves me but cant see a future due to my temper tantrums. He said he will b in my life, he shall call, meet and talk to me, but we both… Read more »
Mitali
Guest
Can it happen that maybe while you are thinking so much about how to get him back and have already started doing the nc. And he even reaches out within a week but then goes silent and you suddenly notice him posting a lot or trying to get u jealous or catch your attention. I’m just curious that maybe while you’re following tricks to get him back. What if he’s doing same for u and you both get disappointed as both of you are doing nc and no one would reach out first? What are your views on it. I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Mitali,

if he’s doing nc, that means he’s trying to get you back but I think you meant, that he’s just trying to make you jealous.. Yes, that happens.

Mitali
Guest
Can it happen that maybe while you are thinking so much about how to get him back and have already started doing the nc. And he even reaches out within a week but then goes silent and you suddenly notice him posting a lot or trying to get u jealous or catch your attention. I’m just curious that maybe while you’re following tricks to get him back. What if he’s doing same for u and you both get disappointed as both of you are doing nc and no one would reach out first? What are your views on it. I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Mitali,

if he’s doing nc, that means he’s trying to get you back but I think you meant, that he’s just trying to make you jealous.. Yes, that happens.

Lucy
Guest
Hi, my ex is so on and off constantly. He breaks up with me, then for one reason or another I end up contacting him (when I’m upset, and/or drunk). We then carry on contact and then he begs for my forgiveness. Says he’s going to be better for me treat me right etc, talking about marriage and the future! We then have an argument he ignores me, shuts off and ends things again. For the first time when he did this I just basically said “right okay” and left it instead of begging. I saw him on a night… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
SV
Guest
Hey guys, A little background, after 1.5 years my ex broke up with me. Things went pretty bad the last two months and he said he dont see it going anywhere. We were in ldr and we commute between continents. So our last days I went to him, and he was insanely angry over everything. Main anger was my ex before him and the rest are build ups i guess. He said he still wants to talk to me but he needs time, I took the opportunity to do NC, and was working on myself. I was pretty suprised with… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

if he’s still angry, apologize and then stop initiating. Either do last nc, or set a limit on until when you would wait for him initiate to start building rapport again.

Lucy
Guest
Hi, my ex is so on and off constantly. He breaks up with me, then for one reason or another I end up contacting him (when I’m upset, and/or drunk). We then carry on contact and then he begs for my forgiveness. Says he’s going to be better for me treat me right etc, talking about marriage and the future! We then have an argument he ignores me, shuts off and ends things again. For the first time when he did this I just basically said “right okay” and left it instead of begging. I saw him on a night… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
SV
Guest
Hey guys, A little background, after 1.5 years my ex broke up with me. Things went pretty bad the last two months and he said he dont see it going anywhere. We were in ldr and we commute between continents. So our last days I went to him, and he was insanely angry over everything. Main anger was my ex before him and the rest are build ups i guess. He said he still wants to talk to me but he needs time, I took the opportunity to do NC, and was working on myself. I was pretty suprised with… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

if he’s still angry, apologize and then stop initiating. Either do last nc, or set a limit on until when you would wait for him initiate to start building rapport again.

Charlotte
Guest
My partner of 12 and a half years left on New Years Day telling me that he doesn’t want me anymore, that there’s nothing there and that he can’t be bothered to try work things out with me. For the first two weeks he was back and forth, wanted to work things out, then he didn’t, then he did but then he said he “wouldn’t let it work”. He cried his heart out when he packed all of his belongings two weeks later and apologised – he told me he isn’t sure if it’s the right thing but thinks it… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Charlotte,

Do you want to try the nc rule?

Charlotte
Guest
My partner of 12 and a half years left on New Years Day telling me that he doesn’t want me anymore, that there’s nothing there and that he can’t be bothered to try work things out with me. For the first two weeks he was back and forth, wanted to work things out, then he didn’t, then he did but then he said he “wouldn’t let it work”. He cried his heart out when he packed all of his belongings two weeks later and apologised – he told me he isn’t sure if it’s the right thing but thinks it… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Charlotte,

Do you want to try the nc rule?

Lyree
Guest
Boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me a few months ago. The last month together he was acting like a total stranger. We never really fought, had good communication, until our last month together. We have seen each other a few times since and everytime I see him he seems like he has moved on and is emotionless towards me. He has told me that I am a great, unique person, and that he wont be able to find anyone like me again but he doesnt want to be in the relationship and that I should move on. I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lyree,

It looks like he has moved on.. If you want, you can try this one:
The Best Way To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Interested In You Again

Lyree
Guest
Boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me a few months ago. The last month together he was acting like a total stranger. We never really fought, had good communication, until our last month together. We have seen each other a few times since and everytime I see him he seems like he has moved on and is emotionless towards me. He has told me that I am a great, unique person, and that he wont be able to find anyone like me again but he doesnt want to be in the relationship and that I should move on. I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lyree,

It looks like he has moved on.. If you want, you can try this one:
The Best Way To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Interested In You Again

Vero
Guest
Hey, my boyfriend and me broke up last year on Christmas. I made very little mistakes and I initiated NC on the 31 December. He told me he lost feelings but didn’t know why…but I was so important to him, he made a request to stay friends, which I refused. We go to school together and are sitting together 3 times a week. He never initiated contact but rather starts talking to me, when I talk to my friends. So, he interferes in my conversations most of the times, when he is nearby. But I told him, as I initiated… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
Vero
Guest
Hey, my boyfriend and me broke up last year on Christmas. I made very little mistakes and I initiated NC on the 31 December. He told me he lost feelings but didn’t know why…but I was so important to him, he made a request to stay friends, which I refused. We go to school together and are sitting together 3 times a week. He never initiated contact but rather starts talking to me, when I talk to my friends. So, he interferes in my conversations most of the times, when he is nearby. But I told him, as I initiated… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
April
Guest
Hi, a week ago my boyfriend of about 5 months broke up with me because he found out about an indiscretion that I had had early on in the relationship. I feel truly and utterly terrible about what I did, and as much as I’ve apologized I know he isn’t really buying my apologies. I knew that he had had a bad experience with multiple girls in the past cheating on him, but I truly didn’t believe that the relationship was anything serious at first (this had happened in the first few weeks of us dating). He says that the… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi April,

looks like he wants to be friends with benefits with you.. have you take our quiz?

April
Guest
Hi, a week ago my boyfriend of about 5 months broke up with me because he found out about an indiscretion that I had had early on in the relationship. I feel truly and utterly terrible about what I did, and as much as I’ve apologized I know he isn’t really buying my apologies. I knew that he had had a bad experience with multiple girls in the past cheating on him, but I truly didn’t believe that the relationship was anything serious at first (this had happened in the first few weeks of us dating). He says that the… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi April,

looks like he wants to be friends with benefits with you.. have you take our quiz?

Nikki
Guest
I broke up with my boyfriend due to things I was overthinking and because I felt our relationship wasn’t growing and I immediately regretted it. I texted him in the next two days saying that I did feel like that but I felt bad for not talking to him about the issues I was keeping bottled up and I would give him another chance and he said what I said was right and that we should find relationships where we can grow. He unfollowed me on everything a couple weeks in and now I want to get back with him.… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Nikki,

Take back being friends.. Tell him being friends is not workable right now then thank him for everything..and then start the nc rule..

Nikki
Guest
I broke up with my boyfriend due to things I was overthinking and because I felt our relationship wasn’t growing and I immediately regretted it. I texted him in the next two days saying that I did feel like that but I felt bad for not talking to him about the issues I was keeping bottled up and I would give him another chance and he said what I said was right and that we should find relationships where we can grow. He unfollowed me on everything a couple weeks in and now I want to get back with him.… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Nikki,

Take back being friends.. Tell him being friends is not workable right now then thank him for everything..and then start the nc rule..

Imogen
Guest
Hi, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me at the end of November with distance being an issue in our relationship. He was never ok with being long distance and always hated when we were apart, so I knew after living together for a year, being apart suddenly would be very difficult for us to cope with. When we met to break up he was absolutely devastated and crying and kept saying how he wanted me in his life and wanted to be friends with me and he sent me a text afterwards saying he’d always care a… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Imogen,

she could be a rebound but check this one:
EBR 015: How To Get A Long Distance Boyfriend Back If He Has A New Girlfriend

Imogen
Guest
Hi, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me at the end of November with distance being an issue in our relationship. He was never ok with being long distance and always hated when we were apart, so I knew after living together for a year, being apart suddenly would be very difficult for us to cope with. When we met to break up he was absolutely devastated and crying and kept saying how he wanted me in his life and wanted to be friends with me and he sent me a text afterwards saying he’d always care a… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Imogen,

she could be a rebound but check this one:
EBR 015: How To Get A Long Distance Boyfriend Back If He Has A New Girlfriend

Jamielee sweeney
Guest
Help, my boyfriend ended the relationship on Thursday night after a stupid argument over Ikea and me not dropping the argument. We just celebrated out one year anniversary of being together at the weekend and we where planning a holiday at the start of the week. After our argument he left the house and didn’t speak to me all Thursdays and then text on Thursday night saying it was over. I woke up on Friday morning to his fb pictures being deleted, unfrieneded on fb and all my family unfriended and tonight he’s posted a status about snap chat inviting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jamieless, .

either he’s just acting out of emotion or he’s using what happened as an excuse for breaking up with you.

Jamielee sweeney
Guest
Help, my boyfriend ended the relationship on Thursday night after a stupid argument over Ikea and me not dropping the argument. We just celebrated out one year anniversary of being together at the weekend and we where planning a holiday at the start of the week. After our argument he left the house and didn’t speak to me all Thursdays and then text on Thursday night saying it was over. I woke up on Friday morning to his fb pictures being deleted, unfrieneded on fb and all my family unfriended and tonight he’s posted a status about snap chat inviting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jamieless, .

either he’s just acting out of emotion or he’s using what happened as an excuse for breaking up with you.

Heather
Guest
My ex fiancé and I a month ago he never really broke up with me. I the reason behind the so called break up and he is blaming me because I lied about my friend who I dated in the past was having issues with his current ex. Which I was mutual friends with both of them. Not even a day after I leave he started a relationship with our roommate and my best friend girlfriend. She not a good person and she lies to him a lot. They moved into a separate place. And I tried begging him for… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Heather,

do you want to try the no contact rule?

Heather
Guest
My ex fiancé and I a month ago he never really broke up with me. I the reason behind the so called break up and he is blaming me because I lied about my friend who I dated in the past was having issues with his current ex. Which I was mutual friends with both of them. Not even a day after I leave he started a relationship with our roommate and my best friend girlfriend. She not a good person and she lies to him a lot. They moved into a separate place. And I tried begging him for… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Heather,

do you want to try the no contact rule?

Lizbet
Guest
My boyfriend and I had become platonic friends the last year or so of a 10.5 year relationship. He kept calling me his girlfriend and signing his emails ” I love you” etc although I did not return that sentiment; I didn’t want to lead him on. He started seeing someone and did not tell me about it. She stopped seeing him because he kept on talking about me. Finally he called me, told me about her, and wanted me to call her to tell her what a great loyal guy he was and that he loved her!. I got… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lizbet,

Did you mean you want him to change? And if he does, you’ll get back with him? If yes, start slowly rebuilding rapport so that you’ll know if he changed or not

Lizbet
Guest
My boyfriend and I had become platonic friends the last year or so of a 10.5 year relationship. He kept calling me his girlfriend and signing his emails ” I love you” etc although I did not return that sentiment; I didn’t want to lead him on. He started seeing someone and did not tell me about it. She stopped seeing him because he kept on talking about me. Finally he called me, told me about her, and wanted me to call her to tell her what a great loyal guy he was and that he loved her!. I got… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lizbet,

Did you mean you want him to change? And if he does, you’ll get back with him? If yes, start slowly rebuilding rapport so that you’ll know if he changed or not

Sophie
Guest
My ex and I were together for 4 and a half years, we lived together renting for 3 years and then moved into my parents with our 3 dogs to save for a mortgage. About 2 months ago he said he was unhappy and wasn’t sure if he knew if he wanted to be with me anymore, we talked and it turned out he was struggling to live in such a family environment with my mum and dad as he doesn’t speak to his and felt like he had no space. We talked and I thought things would be ok… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Sophie,

He’s in a grass is greener.. Has he packed all of his items?

Sophie
Guest
My ex and I were together for 4 and a half years, we lived together renting for 3 years and then moved into my parents with our 3 dogs to save for a mortgage. About 2 months ago he said he was unhappy and wasn’t sure if he knew if he wanted to be with me anymore, we talked and it turned out he was struggling to live in such a family environment with my mum and dad as he doesn’t speak to his and felt like he had no space. We talked and I thought things would be ok… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Sophie,

He’s in a grass is greener.. Has he packed all of his items?

Alexander Brown
Guest
Hey guys, Broke up with my ex 3months ago while suffering with depression and thinking I had fallen in love with my best friend. He begged for me back for the first month and I wasn’t ready, now I am. Our first meet he said the relationship was dead, had a two week NC met and explained I had same feelings he said it’d take time. I had an argument and he was drunk said he was angry and wanted me to give up hope as he couldn’t see the further and wasn’t coming back. He even argrily asked his… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Alexander,

Restart nc, and do at least 30 days and after that slowly rebuild rapport.

Alexander Brown
Guest
Hey guys, Broke up with my ex 3months ago while suffering with depression and thinking I had fallen in love with my best friend. He begged for me back for the first month and I wasn’t ready, now I am. Our first meet he said the relationship was dead, had a two week NC met and explained I had same feelings he said it’d take time. I had an argument and he was drunk said he was angry and wanted me to give up hope as he couldn’t see the further and wasn’t coming back. He even argrily asked his… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Alexander,

Restart nc, and do at least 30 days and after that slowly rebuild rapport.

Abby
Guest

My ex boyfriend wants to help me pay for rent since he left me in the middle of our lease. I didn’t answer his message since I just started nc two weeks ago. But idk if I should and what I should say. I just got a new job and a part of me thinks I should at least say I’m not going to ask for your help unless I need it and I’m okay for now. But the other part says don’t talk to him at all. What do I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Abby,

no need to answer it because it looks like he’s just trying to see if you are going to reply.

Abby
Guest

My ex boyfriend wants to help me pay for rent since he left me in the middle of our lease. I didn’t answer his message since I just started nc two weeks ago. But idk if I should and what I should say. I just got a new job and a part of me thinks I should at least say I’m not going to ask for your help unless I need it and I’m okay for now. But the other part says don’t talk to him at all. What do I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Abby,

no need to answer it because it looks like he’s just trying to see if you are going to reply.

Debra Bere
Guest
After 20 months together my ex boyfriend suddenly wanted space. A week later he broke up with me over the phone and gave vague reasons. He started hanging with some single friends and went on Tinder and Bumble. Btw we are bot divorced in our 50’s. Once I found this out I asked for my belongings back and decided to also date. I met a nice guy who is my friend. My ex spoke to me after a few weeks of NC but never said he wanted us to get back together. I told him I did and before I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Debra,

He broke up with you..it’s not wrong to date after that. Don’t go to his place, that would be chasing..restart the nc rule

Debra Bere
Guest
After 20 months together my ex boyfriend suddenly wanted space. A week later he broke up with me over the phone and gave vague reasons. He started hanging with some single friends and went on Tinder and Bumble. Btw we are bot divorced in our 50’s. Once I found this out I asked for my belongings back and decided to also date. I met a nice guy who is my friend. My ex spoke to me after a few weeks of NC but never said he wanted us to get back together. I told him I did and before I… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Debra,

He broke up with you..it’s not wrong to date after that. Don’t go to his place, that would be chasing..restart the nc rule

Jasmin
Guest
After almost a year I felt something was wrong. I tried to give him space but eventually asked if he would like to take a break. He told me things aren’t going well and he would like to break up. I didn’t take it too well and texted him for two days. After seeing him sad at work I tried to speak with him saying I’m also sad. He was mean and angry, So I stopped contacting him for a few weeks. I apologized again and he said my apologies are insulting (we both have our baggage). I have no… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jasmin,

Looks like he thinks you’re chasing him and it’s annoying him…Check this one:
EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

Jasmin
Guest
After almost a year I felt something was wrong. I tried to give him space but eventually asked if he would like to take a break. He told me things aren’t going well and he would like to break up. I didn’t take it too well and texted him for two days. After seeing him sad at work I tried to speak with him saying I’m also sad. He was mean and angry, So I stopped contacting him for a few weeks. I apologized again and he said my apologies are insulting (we both have our baggage). I have no… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Jasmin,

Looks like he thinks you’re chasing him and it’s annoying him…Check this one:
EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

Beth
Guest
My ex and I broke up a day before our one year anniversary. He said that I didn’t change, he did and basically said that he gets bored/looses interest in relationships after a year. (Note: he said this happened with his ex-wife who cheated and his ex who wouldn’t work on things so he supposedly hates them both.) He moved into my apartment in November and we broke up about 5 weeks later. As little as two weeks before, we talked about moving into our own apartment and pets. To be clear, I am the one who realized something was… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Beth,

It’s his way of maintaining power..

Beth
Guest
My ex and I broke up a day before our one year anniversary. He said that I didn’t change, he did and basically said that he gets bored/looses interest in relationships after a year. (Note: he said this happened with his ex-wife who cheated and his ex who wouldn’t work on things so he supposedly hates them both.) He moved into my apartment in November and we broke up about 5 weeks later. As little as two weeks before, we talked about moving into our own apartment and pets. To be clear, I am the one who realized something was… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Beth,

It’s his way of maintaining power..

Andrea
Guest
I’ve been on and off with a guy for over 3 years and it ended quite badly recently but he’s decided he wants to be friends. He’s making the effort to apologise for treating me badly and seems to understand why it was hurtful. He’s never made this kind of effort before or bothered to listen to me. I can see that he still likes me and wants to spend time with me often but he doesn’t seem to realise it himself and says it’s easier to find someone else. How can I tell if he likes me on not… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor