There are many different “signs” that you can look for to know if your ex boyfriend still loves you. This page is going to take an in-depth look at each specific sign and give you an idea on how to proceed if you decide you want your ex boyfriend back. First though, I would be a fool if I didn’t point out that there isn’t an exact science to this. What I mean, is that since we are dealing with a male human being things can be a bit…. unpredictable. So, there may be some rare cases where your ex could exhibit many of the signs below and yet he still might not be interested in you. Don’t worry though, everything that is on this page has been thoroughly researched and is a compilation of many of the best relationship experts advice and findings. While I can’t guarantee anything, I think it is a safe bet to assume that if your ex is doing the things below he is probably interested in you.

Two Things You Have To Do First

things

Before we get down to the nitty gritty on how to determine if your ex still likes you there are two things that I need you to accomplish. The first is relatively simple, the second one… not so much.

  1. I want you to take some time and figure out if you have a legitimate reason for wanting your ex boyfriend back. As a general rule, couples who get back together after a break up tend to have really good reasons for doing so. Oh, and I think it is important to mention that couples who successfully reunite with legitimate reasons last longer! Still confused? Don’t be I actually wrote a huge post that defines what a good reason is and will even give you some examples here.
  2. Secondly, I need you to adopt a No Contact Rule. Experts agree that in order to put yourself in a good position to win back your ex boyfriend you need to cut yourself off from them for at least a month. Make no mistake about it, it will be among the hardest things you have ever done. There will be a constant temptation to call them, email them or text them. Whatever happens make sure you DO NOT DO IT.

(If you want more in-depth help with these two things you can find it here.)

Now, I bet you are wondering what any of this has to do with figuring out if your ex boyfriend still misses you, I assure you it is really important.

The Signs That Your Ex Boyfriend Still Likes You

he loves me

Ok, no matter who broke up with who, how bad the break up was or how much you think he hates you I can assure you one thing… he is thinking about you. Did you know that 81% of people still think about their exes too much? What’s worse is that nearly 90% of Facebook users still look up their ex. So, I think it is safe to assume that you on your exes mind more than you think you are. The real question is, is he thinking positive or negative things about you? At least that is what you are wondering. Obviously, you want your ex to be thinking very positive thoughts when it comes to you as it will make getting him back a lot easier. With that being said, even if your ex thinks you are the anti-christ there are certain things you can do to change his mind. Besides, right after a breakup both parties are angry at each other so there isn’t much positive karma going around is there?

That is where the no contact rule comes in play. I can pretty much guarantee that your ex won’t be having any positive love thoughts about you a few days after your breakup (especially if YOU broke up with him.) By implementing a no contact rule you are doing two things.

  1. First, you are giving him and you time to calm down and get your wits about you.
  2. Secondly, he is going to wonder why you haven’t tried to call or text him to check up (like he thinks you are supposed to do)

Which leads us to our first sign…

Sign 1- If He Calls, Texts or Messages You

texting

We already know that he is thinking about you but if he actually takes the time to text message you or call you then you should feel really good about yourself because he is definitely showing interest. Now, I am not going to sit here and tell you that all your troubles are over and you can run back into his arms and the world will rejoice. Let’s be honest here, just because he text messaged you doesn’t mean that he wants you back but it is definitely a sign pointing in the right direction. If you are staying true to the NC Rule (No Contact Rule) then you greatly increase your chances of having him contact you in some way. The only thing is you can’t contact him back which is explained if you read my book, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.

Sign 2- Does He Keep An Eye On You?

im-watching-you

While you are supposed to be avoiding your ex both physically and mentally for 30 days there are certain cases where it is impossible to do so. If you notice that your boyfriend keeps popping up in places that you frequent then this is a definite sign that he still has feelings for you. Now, I do feel it is important to mention that sometimes it can just be a coincidence that they are at the same place that you are. However, I would say  that if you notice them “being around” at least three times then that is a definite pattern.

Sign 3- Do You Get A Reaction?

react

As you know, I am pushing the NC rule pretty darn hard. However, I am not naive. I know how relationships work and I know that the majority of women reading this will not be able to hold out for 30 days. So, in the event that you break down one of the best ways you can determine if he still has those deep feelings for you is watching how he reacts when he sees you. This can be a little tricky to determine but I will go ahead and give you some things to watch for.

  • Does his face light up?
  • Does he sneak looks at you when he thinks your not looking?
  • If he talks really fast that is a good sign as well.
  • Looking into your eyes for a long period of time is a good sign too.

Sign 4- Does He Keep In Touch With Friends & Family?

family

Ex boyfriends who are possibly interested in getting back together will keep in touch with your friends or family. This sign especially rings true if you are deep into your no contact. If you aren’t picking up your phone they are going to reach out to friends or family to see how you are. If you want them back then this is a very good sign. Of course, there are some cases where an ex will keep in touch with your family just to annoy you but you can usually tell in those cases.

Sign 5- Touching

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I may lose some man points for this but one of my favorite movies to watch is Hitch (where Will Smith basically plays a love doctor.) There is a scene at the beginning of the movie where he points out that one of the signs that a woman will show, if she is interested in a guy, is touching. Well, the same can be applied to men. If you see your ex and he is maintaining some type of physical contact like touching your arm, hand, knee, leg that is a really good sign.

What To Do After You Have Figured Out He Still Loves You

So, he showed some of the signs above eh? Well, now you have a decision to make. Do you want to try and get him back or do you want to move on? Since this is a website specifically for women who want to get their ex boyfriends back I can tell you that there is so much information on this site for FREE that you will be blown away. However, not all of the information is going to give you 100% of everything you need. It is for that reason that I am highly recommending you to check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO. It is really a true “step by step” method to winning back your ex boyfriends heart. Other than that I hope you enjoy this site and find everything you are looking for.

1,413 thoughts on “This Is How You Know If Your Ex Still Loves You”

  1. Avatar

    Carmen

    June 1, 2019 at 4:45 pm

    So we broke up an engagement like two months ago. We rushed it because we met in September of last year and afterwards we’ve had to figure out gift returning etc and just now I want to initiate the nc rule for 2 weeks he last texted me yesterday thanking me for giving him a grocery gift card bc he now is in financial debt from his bad decision. My question is I am moving to his area and he has an idea but I haven’t confirmed. I should not tell him and carry on this plan without having to confirm with him correct? I ultimately want to get back together with him but I want him to initiate this. His reason for breaking up was that he felt nothingness and he has never had a good female relationship even with his mom who died when he was 15. I need help with this. Thanks!

  2. Avatar

    Luna

    September 22, 2018 at 8:34 pm

    Hello we broke up and after two weeks of no contact, he has been initiating text messages very often. He does not express emotion, only concern about practical details in my life and offers suggestions. I have been writing back. Should I continue to do so?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 23, 2018 at 4:35 pm

      Hi Luna!

      Well, if you want NC to work to its fullest, let him know you need some quiet, private time to heal and take stock of things. Luna, you should pick up my eBook (Pro) so you understand better how to manage this whole time post breakup to better your chances.

  3. Avatar

    Maxine

    August 1, 2018 at 6:02 pm

    Hi we broke up 39 years ago we was never inmate we was kids 15 and 18 he married quickly so i did as well now 39 years later he is remarried to someone else good woman. but i see him now and then not often. this last two times he mentioned how i hurt him and if something should happenid be the first to know. then said i cant change the past and then sung a song in public for me (know onw but me knew it was for me). I wouldnt change u if i could . Wow Now what confused

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 2, 2018 at 3:18 am

      Hi Maxine!

      Wow….that is a first. 39 years separating the breakup and the present. You are right, 39 years is a long time and why he can’t let go of the hurt says more about him than you.

  4. Avatar

    Andrea

    February 22, 2018 at 12:56 pm

    Hi,
    Could you please help with my situation, i dont really know what to do 🙁 we broked up about 3 months ago. I did all the don’t, and I have failed to do NC several times because he kept playing hot and cold. He texts me once a week since our break up. Only when he feels like it, he flirts with me, reminds me of old things, even drunk texts, but when I text him first, or try to mention about our memories together, he acts like I am anoying him and he doesn’t want to talk. We are co worker, but he ignores me, we dont even say “hi”. He still reaches out for my help at work, but he seems to be very easy to loose his temper. He always got mad at me at little things. Sometimes, I even see him checking out on another girl in my team. That really upset me.
    We broke up because I was too needy and childish. I really hope that I can have another chance to fix it… I like him a lot, but I dont know if NC still work for me, and what should I do if he asks for my help during NC?
    Thank you for your time.
    Andrea

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 27, 2018 at 9:30 am

      Hi Andrea,

      There’s a chance nc can still help if you really stick to it.

  5. Avatar

    Ley

    January 15, 2018 at 4:03 pm

    January 15,2018 11:52 PM

    It was already 10 days after our break up. Our relationship lasted of 13 months and 4 days to be exact and we have a long distance relationship. On January 5, 2018, I was just checking him if he was ok that time since I observed that he was very cold at me . And he told me that he wanted to break up with me since he doesn’t loves me anymore about two months ago and it sucks cause it feels like I am betrayed. I ask him many questions and he was just asking if we can still be friends. Because I love him and I agreed with his idea . A week later , he still communicate with me in bubly manner until yesterday he was very cold. I think he was still confuse and I ended up to no contact rule for now. What do you think? Did I choose the right choice? Can someone help me?

    Truly yours,
    Ley

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 15, 2018 at 8:01 pm

  6. Avatar

    Caitlin

    December 31, 2017 at 6:11 am

    My ex boyfriend checks up on me once or twice a month since our relationship ended. We met in college and dated six months after being good friends. We dated for 3 years before I ended it one year ago since my family thought he was using me for citizenship. He is from France but I never believed he’d do that. Nevertheless my family wanted us to be over. He wanted to meet up one last time so we did in April 2017. He did all of those signs ^^^ and we got back together but only lasted 2 months. It was mutual breakup. He wants kids but I don’t. I thought our relationship would never work out because of that and our religions are different. However, he still likes to know what I’m doing and how the family is. I just don’t know what his point is. I love being around him and we are great friends but i dont think he’d want a relationship after ours caused me a lot of tension with family and our future ideals are a little different. He is such a nice guy tho. I’d hate to ignore him. But I’m doing the nc. What should I do?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 31, 2017 at 10:56 pm

  7. Avatar

    Caitlin

    December 30, 2017 at 8:50 pm

    Im very confused on what to do about my ex boyfriend. We first met in college where he discovered my own free tutoring service. We became friends which became a relationship 6 months later. We were in a relationship for almost 3 years which involved helping him move to a new college after I graduated. I decided to end it because my family thinks he was only using me to gain citizenship (he is from France) After we had broken up, he asked me to come visit his new college and he did all those signs ^^^ and we got back together only to last 2 months because my family was really irate with me. Since April 2017, I haven’t seen him but he will randomly text me about 1x each month to see how I am doing. He wonders about family and if im still doing the same hobbies and such. I just don’t know what his point is. He wants children but I don’t and he knows that. But I was his longest relationship and the first one he told his family about. I think he misses me but I just don’t know how to proceed.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 31, 2017 at 10:56 pm

  8. Avatar

    Lisa

    November 6, 2017 at 4:41 am

    My ex boyfriend cheated on me in a drunk one night stand.. We broke up about 4 months ago.. Since then we have kept incontact, he said he is glad we are still friends, and is glad that we are still close, I have tried to do the no contact and lasted over a week, he just told me the other day he is finding it hard to get over me and move on, The other night we had dinner and had a great time, we went back to his place and watched a movie and cuddled on his bed.. I am so confused how to approach this. I want him back and miss him a lot, we were together for over 6 years.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 6, 2017 at 8:12 pm

      Hi Lisa,

      are you currently friends with benefits with him?

  9. Avatar

    Leea

    September 14, 2017 at 11:10 am

    Hi! my bf and i broke on d day dat we r supposed to celebrate our first aniversary. Prior to dat we had a fight and it triggers all. actualy, we had a secret and ldr relationship. that’s why it’s secret bcoz im afraid dat my parents will not support our relationship since he’s not a proffesional ;( . but i rily do love him.. going back, the fight started 3rd week of july, although we fixed it aftr dat, he’s treatment for me is not d same anymor. until our anvrsary came august first week.. dat was also d time he expressed his hurt about our situation. and so i sed maybe we needed time and space and he agreed. ;( .. we had no contct for 1 month.. and den last week we had a short convrsation and we even met. we talked. yes he stil loves me. but accdng to him, sumtyms love just aint enough. he saidsol he wants is to be succsful in life. he wants to have a busines on his own so dat one day we can be togethr or i may be proud of him. he said dat he’s jst thinkng about me. he doesn’t want me to get hurt, he’s afraid my parents will get angry at me or say hurftul words about me. life sumtymes is so ironic. by the time when im redi to fight togethr with him is also the time he gave up. he loves me but we r not in a relationship. i just dnt undrstand it! ;( i dnt know if im going to move on or hold on to his promise. it’s so confusing. pls help me ;(

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      September 15, 2017 at 4:32 pm

      Hi Leea,

      Restart nc.. Be active in improving yourself and in posting and then continue doing that after nc while slowly rebuilding rapport with him.. Take this as a restart

  10. Avatar

    Jen

    July 7, 2017 at 1:41 pm

    I broke up with my boyfriend 8 months ago. It was a great relationship never yelled and always talked things out. We helped each other with everything… although he stole from me. I talked to his family about it apparently he does that to everyone, right after the break up I went with my ex, and stopped answering his phone calls. Although as soon as i went with my ex,, I rememberd how my boyfriend treated me and realized my ex treated me really bad, so i broke up with him and a month later i found out i was preg… both guys were a week apart.. since then i havent talked to my first boyfriend at all… and i think about him all the time and how good he was to me.,. He helped me all the time and was always around and never got mad at me.. even thought he did stole.. 8 months later.. i am 8 months preg.. i saw my my first boyfriend the one that i love that did steal from me.. i said hi.. and as soon as he saw me his voice changed and he came up to me repeatedly saying how sorry he was for stealing and evrything that happened.. and i am better then him. I didnt know what to say.. all i knew is that i that i thought about him nonstop the whole 8 months.. he went to walk away i got out of my car.. he turned around and came back..i immdediately said i was preg. Because it is obvious being 8 months.. and he said i know i can be mine. It is mine right? He said it has to be.. if it is mine i will help you and give the boy love. He even asked me to take off my glasses to see my eyes. I suggested that he could stop by sometime and he said what u need to do is have diner with your son and if this baby is mine i will love it. And theough out the whole convo with me he kept saying how proud he was of me cause i have a car now.. and that he doesnr deserve me.. he is nothing. I told him that i dont think i am better then anyone. I miss him so much i hope he stops by.

  11. Avatar

    Victoria Chan

    July 1, 2017 at 3:44 am

    Hi there,

    I am about to meet my bf and he will be ending the relationship as he has already made the move to remove all the stuff we had on social media and has said over text that he cannot do this anymore. We have not spoken for todays since he has said this. Should I still meet him and what should I do or say if I do to keep him from breaking up?

    Thanks.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      July 4, 2017 at 8:16 pm

      Have you met?

  12. Avatar

    Grace

    June 24, 2017 at 7:39 pm

    My boyfriend of 2.5 yrs broke up with me out of the blue two weeks ago. We are both 27 years old, have both been in long term relationships before, and we thought very carefully about being together. Our relationship and our friendship is amazing, we he a connection like I never imagined possible. Only three weeks ago he was talking about having children together and our future. He has recently been through multiple stressful situations, to the point where he began to become depressed and was prescribed some medication. That was a few months ago. When I spoke to him on the phone a weeks ago, he seemed sad, distant, and depressed. He said he is just living day to day, doesn’t want to see his friends, and doesn’t know how to feel about anything any more.
    I realise that I do take some responsibility in the break up, and I have apologised for the things I did, and I have begun counselling to get myself better.
    I am completely devastated by him saying we should just be friends. I am so scared that I will never get him back. He says that he still loves me and he will forever, which is why I am wondering if his medication or depression is to blame. A doctor prescribed him some meds (and gave him the wrong dosage) and neglected to follow up with him to see how he was doing. 
    Two weeks ago when said he needed space, I agreed and we did one week NC. All my friends and family were sure he would come back. Then a week ago he says he wants to be friends, because he would rather be my friend than lose me forever. We talked on the phone for an hour, he said he loves me, we talked about heaps of stuff, we laughed and called each other by our pet names. I asked him to think about it for one more week, and we have had no contact again. So I will hear today his final answer… I’m so scared….

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      June 28, 2017 at 5:55 pm

      Have you talked again? If you’re going to do nc, dont announce it nor tell it to him..

  13. Avatar

    Samantha

    April 29, 2017 at 12:16 pm

    Hi guys! I came across this site after a breakup which I believe was with the love of my life. Anyway, I need some insight. We have been together almost 2 and a half years and we had it made. We had a beautiful wonderful relationship and we became such good friends too! He was such a sweetheart, he called and texted me everyday, planned dates, said one day he wanted to marry me…. he took us wine tasting for our last anniversary and missed super bowl Sunday to go wine tasting with me. Just a genuinely good guy! For the past few months, we have been fighting a lot. I’ve been super stressed with life and dealing badly with anxiety. Every time we talked and hung out instead of it being fun and light like it used to, it was stressful. I think my attitude pushed him away. So we decided to go on a break and we were originally going to get back together next week because things were going well, but it wasn’t until the time that he decided he still needed more time ent wasn’t ready for a relationship that I really started realizing things! I realize our relationship needs more balance, that I need to love myself more, that I need to have a life outside of him etc. so anyways he called me a day after we broke up and we talked and he said “I will have feelings for you until the day I die. For now I want to be friends, but I’m open to whatever happens down the line. I still love you, I’ll always love you, I just need to work on me right now”. We have plans to gather our belongings today but he mentioned even hanging out…. I know he’s totally into me still he even said he broke up with the relationship and what it became not me. And when I give him space, he texts or calls me everyday. I’m hopeful that being friends or whatever can be a new start because he said he isn’t looking to date or get with other girls he just wants to rebalance his life. I basically want to ask if y’all think there’s a chance down the line to get back together? We have been talking but minimally. I think after today we will probably not talk for a few weeks but I also feel like he’s trying to date me again but is just so exhausted wurh fighting and titles. Thoughts?! I know he’s still interested so I’m not sure if NC applied? He said he wanted to call me last night and I said I wasn’t busy which I was so I’m trying to create that space at least. My mom and dad, sister, counsin, friends and therapist all think he just needs some time and life will bring us back together. All our photos are still up and he’s trying to talk to me. Do you think there is potential?

    1. Avatar

      Samantha

      April 29, 2017 at 12:18 pm

      *said I WAS busy so he didn’t call but I think he will today for the plans we have

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 30, 2017 at 11:59 am

      did he call? If you’re going to do nc, do at least 30 days.

  14. Avatar

    KAY

    April 28, 2017 at 4:29 pm

    broke up for 2 months, and met up a couple of times, and what seems more like booty call to me, so is he still interested in me or is he just wanting what to satisfied himself? did NC for 3 weeks previously. do i have to do it again?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 30, 2017 at 11:31 am

      did you mean you slept with him?

  15. Avatar

    Gianne B. Joseph

    April 20, 2017 at 7:21 am

    Hi,Me and my boyfriend broke up last December.I can give you the specific details if you wanted to,and I’m really need your help Ex Recovery Team…And even I wanted to purchase your product by the way,I really can’t purchase it because I don’t have any money,or any credit card,so I’m only reading some articles on your website,or watching some videos too of Brad Browning 🙂 .After our break up,of course I’m still shock and being emotional. And Because I didn’t know that there is a certain things to do to get your ex back like No contact.By my instinct,I began to begged,cry,gnatting him,to the point that as a result he’s pushing me away.Our break up began in Christmas break,uhmn I guess December 18.So I continued to message him(usually we talk in Facebook Messenger and I also have the access to his account uptil now) of course he always ignoring me,and there are times we have fight,and he always says that he already a stoned-heart/cold-hearted and also there are times as well that he gives me the hot treatment that he still care.You can directly see that he still cares for me if he had any emojis through his message like heart,etc.And yeah he give me the hot and cold treatment.Then in January,it always continue of that routine the hot and cold,and I can see that he still loves me and cares for me,but the thing is that its not really the same as before because of his messages to me or replies.Last December-April(today)it continues to be hot and cold,but I see to myself that in his text messages in Messenger that he’s really care for me,love me and such.But what I’m really facing is that “cold treatment” and I can’t blame him for that because he also been hurt just like I did.We both did.Whenever I feel emotional or sad,he’s gonna give me the cold.Or whenever I’m kinda needy?And whenever he recalls something sad memories in our relationship, or whenever he feels the sadness in his broken family.And yesterday,We are in a fight (via
    messenger) because of my jealousy,and then blah blah blah many things saying Im immature .Then we didn’t talk to each other,until today…And we even have plans for tomorrow a date.Now he says that We’re not okay,so I think we can’t have the date tomorrow.I’m gonna give you space. And he even says that if you’re planning to go to my house,you can’t because there are many stuff going around here(they are renovating their grandma’s house which also he lives in due to his broken family) And base on him,I know that he’s giving me the cold…only on me.Because I sign up to his account to check on him and yeah he just ignore my Message.Usually we always reply fast to each other. Amor,can I still have the chance to get my ex back?Can I use the 30 days no contact here?..I wanted to started it and wishing that It will be effective to my ex.And I wanted to use the no Contact period to be prepared and being a better of me.But If I started it right now,the end of the nc is in May which my only choice to iniate contact is by texting?Which I’m kinda scared that he just give me the cold,or he just ignored it…I wanted to iniate the contact in the first day of school in order to have any spark or attractiveness to me,I hope you can help me…I believe in all of you in the ex recovery team…I’m already in so much depression, and anxiety…I wanted to be a better of me and bring my ex back…all I wanted is to be happy…

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 25, 2017 at 3:26 pm

      You’re already friendzoned..the only thing that can really help increase your chances is nc..and the only one that can help is yourself.. It would be better if he thinks you don’t want him..because that means you’re not chasing anymore

  16. Avatar

    Gianne B. Joseph

    April 18, 2017 at 6:27 am

    Hi,I have a question.Can I still get my ex back?(By the way,he’s the one who broke up with me)You see,we broke up last December and yet until today we still talk to each other.But the problem is…I didn’t start the no contact period after our break up because I didn’t know that and yeah common after a breakup,is that someone begans to begged,plead and such,right?I really do that stupid mistake.We still talk to each other,positive talk and messages.But here’s the thing too,sometimes he also give me the “cold” treatment whenever I’m kinda needy (which is wrong)and whenever he recalls the negative memories(& of course I can’t blame him for that).Can I still do the no contact?Because if I start the no contact there is possibility that he might think that “So after all this,you left me hanging”.I want to do the no contact in a positive way, and I want to do it without any problems. Without any negative thoughts that he might think..What should I do?I hope you can help me

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 25, 2017 at 3:27 pm

      You’re already friendzoned..the only thing that can really help increase your chances is nc..and the only one that can help is yourself.. It would be better if he thinks you don’t want him..because that means you’re not chasing anymore

  17. Avatar

    Sally

    April 17, 2017 at 8:01 pm

    We broke up nearly 8months ago. We didn’t quarrel. He was ill since a long time and slowly he stopped contact. After 4months he met me and proposed to get back. I was really angry and didn’t agree, yet I loved him so much. He never tried a 2nd time. I decided to move on. Eventually I met someone else and got into a relationship. Although I couldn’t really love him. Yet I thought with time things would get easier and I would fall in love with him. But sometimes whenever I meet my ex at college I couldn’t resist myself from thinking how much I love him. And some days before we got on the same bus. After a bit of talking he held my hand and told me he would miss me. And now its so much more difficult for me to deal with this. I miss him even more. I don’t know how to tell my present bf. And neither do I know whether to get back with my ex. I don’t even know whether he wants me back or not. And most importantly I don’t want to hurt my present bf. Cause I know how this feels. But on the other hand its killing me. What should I do?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 24, 2017 at 6:47 pm

      be in a relationship because you want to be in a relationship with that person.. you’re already hurting him by staying even if you dont love him

  18. Avatar

    Kiki

    April 9, 2017 at 9:10 pm

    Hey my boyfriend and I were togheter for 4 months our relationship was so perfect, but unfortunately I got pregnant and since were are only 20 somethings we decided not to keep it, he supported me very well. But 2 months later and then last week we had a fight, following day he went to a friend and didn’t return and said he needed time and doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now but I can see that he still loves me, what do I do? Where did it went wrong?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 10, 2017 at 7:56 pm

      what was the fight about? are you going to do the no contact rule?

  19. Avatar

    Gina

    March 21, 2017 at 2:06 am

    Hi!
    My bf and i broke up two months ago.I tried to follow the program and did 15 days no contact, he contacted me, we talked sometimes and then he agreed to fly to ny to see me. I saw him where he lives the following week.When we see each other is like nothing has changed but he still refuses to get back together even though he claims he still loves me.He is breaking the relationship off because he has to focus on his career plus the long distance and age difference doesn’t help. I admit I cried a lot when I saw him but regardless we had a great time and said he would see me again but we cant date at the moment. seeing him again after the initial break up, brought old feelings back and i just wanted everything to get back to normal so i texted him, called him several times he replied but i knew he didnt want to talk and mutliple times he said that i have to stop.He has told me a million times why we cant date and somehow hes been patient with my text novels haha. He says he doesnt have time for a relationship that is not fair for us and that we can still be friends and see each other ocasionally, maybe down the line well cross path again. He says that his main focus is his career right now. Should I do the program again or when someone if not ready, they are really not ready? I know he still loves me and i know our situation is very difficult as we are in different stages of our lives (im in college / hes working in his career, travelling 5 times a week and we live in different cities and are from different countries lol). Do I still have a chance?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 24, 2017 at 9:29 pm

      Hi Gina,

      this time do a 45 day one, and make it seem that you’re moving on and then slowly build rapport after

  20. Avatar

    N

    March 14, 2017 at 3:34 pm

    So I’m stuck.
    I’ve been exclusively dating a guy for more than a year. We had been fighting for the last few months due to his commitment issues (ie. he wanted to do all the relationship things but not be official). So I told him this wasn’t serving him and seemed to be stressing him out so I would fall back. He proceeded to ask “so because I don’t want a relationship you are done with me?” to which I told him I wanted people who were intentional with having me in their space – why do all the relationship things if there is no purpose ya know? So he goes on to tell me we should compromise because he thinks we could be happy, etc etc but I told him I had been compromising myself to stay with him and that the things he wants comes along with a commitment so he should get his stuff. It’s been a week since I last spoke to him. I want him back but I need him to commit. Also we will both be attending a mutual friends birthday party this weekend where everyone is staying in the same hotel…. how do I practice no contact when we aren’t on bad terms? and should I anticipate seeing him roam free entertaining other women?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 16, 2017 at 9:08 am

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