At Ex Boyfriend Recovery we have been lucky enough to help many women find their way back into their ex boyfriends arms.
Over the years we estimate we have successfully played a role in well over a thousand success stories but the truth is that you don’t care about numbers like that, do you?
No, I could sit here and tell you that I have helped over 15 million women with breakups and it’s not going to have any type of impact.
(Though I have helped that many people through my writing 😉 .)
Well, because all that you care about is the pain you are feeling right now and how to make it stop.
You want your ex back and there is this little voice in the back of your head telling you,
“There is no way I could ever get him back…”
Heck, your friends and family may be playing into that fear as well by telling you the same thing.
So, I thought it might be really fun for me to pick the six best success stories that we have had the pleasure of taking part in over the course of our history and doing a deep dive into what these women did to get their exes back.
I figured we would follow a pretty simple formula going forward,
- I will introduce the name of the woman who got her ex back
- I will provide proof that they got their ex back (usually in the form of one on one interviews or screenshots of emails or Facebook updates.)
- Give you my brief opinion on how difficult of a situation I thought they were in.
- Talk about important lessons that you should derive from their success
Sound like a plan?
Ok, lets begin!
Success Story #1: Anna (The Long Distance Dilemma)
You may have noticed Anna’s success story plastered all throughout the website,
Oh, and if you are reading that success story and wondering who “Jennifer Christina” is, it’s my wife!
What Situation Anna Was In
Anna was in one of the more difficult situations,
It’s really funny because even though I know that long distance relationships are difficult to deal with I still get this sense that I have more knowledge than the average “expert” out there seeing as how I actually am married to a woman who I was in a long distance relationship with for half a year.
Nevertheless, I would classify Anna’s situation as difficult.
Anyways, when we told Anna that we were interested in writing an article like this and we wanted to get her take on her situation again here is what she had to say,
Anna Gives Us Her Thoughts:
In total, the EBR program works! However, there are elements that were especially critical to getting my ex back:
1) Sticking to the No Contact Rule or to the Limited No Contact Rule. I can’t emphasize this enough. It doesn’t matter if you miss him or your pets. It doesn’t matter if it’s his birthday, your birthday, your first date anniversary, that crazy plot twist in the show you both watched, or the appearance of the band that you both LOVED SO MUCH — ANYTHING. DO NOT CONTACT HIM. Do not contact him, his family, his friends, his kids, his cousins, his pets, his co-workers, anything.
2) Stay busy! This goes hand in hand with improving yourself. No Contact became a cakewalk because I was busy from morning until the moment that I went to sleep. Obviously, I kept busy at work (literally, I landed a new job and purposefully negotiated ADDITIONS to my job responsibilities). However, I also enrolled in a new dance class, found a new vocal coach, and started a painting class. On my free days and/or evenings, I scheduled my hours to a) work, b) visit a new place (e.g., art galleries, museums, restaurants, bars, solo road trips, bookstores, etc.), c) hang out with friends, d) game (i.e., I started a new PC game and went hard core on a virtual reality game), and e) set reading/writing/research/self care goals.
3) Freaking out, but putting boundaries on freaking out. I was some combination of sad, angry, worried, depressed, and crying every day. Whenever I felt negative, I’d give in to the feeling, but I’d put a timer on it and forcibly focus on something else. If I cried, I’d cry as much as I could. If I was mad, I’d be very mad. You get the idea! However, negative feelings have a tendency to sit around and multiply. So, after whatever length of time that I chose passed, I’d a) get up and either leave the room (or my house) or b) start doing some other activity or talk to someone in person.
As an example, I was at an event, and I felt incredibly sad that he wasn’t there. So, I stood there for 30 seconds feeling sad, then I joined a group of people and started talking to them. As another example, I was crying at home, so I did that for 20 minutes then got in my car and went to the museum.
4) Plan. Plan. Plan. Plan. One of the great things about EBR is that it forces you to think about your relationship in the long-term and figure out how to make it successful after you get back together. For example, there’s a suggested time table for texting, which implies you should construct or draft all your texts ahead of time. There’s an outline how to make a long-distance relationship work.
Success Story #2: Sarah (The Long Distance Army Ex Boyfriend)
This is one of my favorites due to how much I personally learned from the woman who got her ex back.
But first things first, you require proof,
Sarah was one of my favorite interviews due to how blown away I was about how she approached her situation.
Speaking of her situation.
The Situation Sarah Was In
Sarah was in an extremely difficult situation due to the fact that her ex was in the army and he was long distance.
If you haven’t already read my article on what to do if your ex is in the army please do so.
It can really do a great job of outlining how difficult of a scenario this is.
Nevertheless, Sarah did an incredible job of navigating those choppy waters,
Sarah Gives Us Her Thoughts
Really the best thing you can do if you want to get a full account of how Sarah got her ex boyfriend back in this circumstance I recommend you watch the video I attached above.
But if you aren’t really a “video person” I roped Sarah into writing a guest post for the website where she talks about the methods she used to get her ex back.
I highly recommend you read this article.
Success Story #3: Kevyn (The General Breakup!)
Kevyn is one of my favorite success stories due to she is one of the original members that we had in our Private Support Group and she still pops in to provide support to the ladies there!
Oh, here is the proof that she got her ex back,
Kevyn was nice enough to give us the exact reasoning behind her breakup for this article,
Age: 24, 23 at time of breakup
Boyfriend age: 26, 25 at time of breakup
Relationship length: 2 months
Breakup reason: Didn’t want anything serious
No contact length: ~24+30 days
Recovery time: 6 months
I would classify her situation as a “general breakup” and generally speaking (see what I did there?) General breakups are among the situations with the best chance of success.
Neverthless, Kevyn had some really interesting things to say,
Conclusions and Advice:
So, what I learned from this entire EBR process is what Chris says all the time:
Be the best version of yourself you can be.
Confidence and self-improvement is key. Try to be as active as you can, in several areas. Not just to get your ex back, but for yourself. If you have mutual interests, use that to your advantage. Look for opportunities that interest you and that would catch his attention. And try to make yourself as omnipresent as possible.
Stick To The Program:
This goes without saying. Do no contact, it’s so important.
It makes them miss you…
It makes them wonder.
Use jealousy when you can but be very careful with it!
Follow the texting guidelines as closely as you can and NEVER be a GNAT! Use enough space between things to keep them yearning for more.
Don’t Get Mad Or Emotional:
Despite how I may come off on EBR, I am actually a pretty emotionally turbulent person and can get scary angry about things.
But I kept my emotions in check throughout the breakup.
I talked to a therapist.
I talked to my friends (not always recommended).
I channeled my anger into the bar at the gym. Just remember ANYTHING you say can change your progress.
Think of it like a Miranda Warning: Everything you say can and will be used against you.
Don’t show any bad emotions, no matter how tempting it is to want to scream at him for being a horrible potato. And trust me, that’s gonna happen a lot.
Don’t Give Up:
Even when times are dark, you must find a way to move forward, whether it’s in continuing your plan or finding a new one.
I thought for sure that I would NEVER get back a 2 month fling with a guy who didn’t want anything serious, especially one who wouldn’t reply to my texts!
But I did, because I played my cards right and showed him that I was a girl worth being in a relationship with. And you can do it too.
Just don’t give up!
Success Story #4: Sarah Michelle (The “We Are Never Getting Back Together” Ex)
Sarah Michelle or (Buffy as I like to call her since her name is similar to Sarah Michelle Gellar) is one of my favorite success stories because my wife and I spent quite a bit of time helping her out.
Anyways, here is proof that she got her ex back,
The Situation Buffy Was In
This is a situation that I would classify as a teensy bit more difficult than normal.
Well, even though Sarah’s situation is classified as general her ex added an extra twist to the breakup by saying,
“There is no way we are going to ever get back together…”
Which I find really fascinating considering that he did get back with her!
Buffy Gives Us Her Thoughts
So, if you want a full scoop on the lessons that Sarah obtained from the breakup then I highly recommend you watch the full interview that I did with Sarah.
However, if you are itching for something a bit more I would like to point you to this little gem we received on our private support group from Sarah,
Actually the point I really want to highlight for you is this,
“I know how rough it can be. I heard all the negative comments from mine when we were split. Stick with the no contact and improving yourself ladies. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.”
The morale of the story is that your ex boyfriend doesn’t always mean what he says initially after a breakup.
Success Story #5: Mary (The Ghosted Situation)
Are you familiar with the term “ghosting?”
It is when someone you are dating basically disappears from your life with no warning.
Mary is very familiar with it as it is what her ex boyfriend did to her.
Imagine this, you wake up one day thinking everything is right in the world only to find out that your ex boyfriend has blocked you on Facebook.
And yet, Mary found a way to persevere despite all of this,
The Situation Mary Was In
Mary was in a situation that I consider to be one of the most difficult.
She was blocked from her ex with no way to communicate with him.
Whether you like it or not, communication is essential to getting an ex back. You need some means of communication to even have a chance and if those are all taken away from you, you are practically dead in the water.
But Mary found a way to get her ex back.
Mary Gives Us Her Thoughts
Like usual I am going to highly recommend you watch my interview with Mary in full.
That is all 😉 .