So you know that your makeup is on point and your brand new outfit could not compliment your body any better. The lighting is perfect and you just know the selfie you snapped will get a ton of likes.
No filters needed today!
You hit that post button and head out with the girls.
The notifications start rolling in.
Your best friend comments telling you to kill it, your mom swoons about what a beautiful young woman you are, the likes keep on coming….
And then it happens.
The notification you were secretly hoping for but were too scared to hope for… Your Ex’s name pops up as the 27th “like”.
At first you’re flooded with happiness.
He noticed you!
But then it hits you.
Wait… What does this mean?!
Does he miss me?
Does he love me!?
Is this a game?!
It’s easy to get carried away in this situation and lose sight of what was really important to begin with (you! Looking fabulous. Duh!) Whenever you feel like you are getting anxious regarding a situation involving your Ex do something to take yourself out of your own mind until you are able to view things logically.
To help take away some of the anxiety and concern surrounding a like from your Ex is the following list.
So, let’s sit back, relax, and think about it… What DOES it mean when your Ex likes a photo on social media?
Liking Reason #1: He Recognizes Hottness When He Sees It
Why do we like other people’s pictures on social media?
Because we see something that we like.
Either their smile, that spark in their eye, or that gorgeous curl they’ve put in their hair. While men may not think about how great a girl’s contour and highlight look, they know a good-looking picture when they see it.
When an Ex is passing through Facebook or Instagram he may just hit that like button purely because of the physical or sexual attraction that the photo elicits. If this is the reason for the attention it is important to note that there is not necessarily any emotional component attached to the action. It’s important to be cautious of this reasoning.
If the like is shortly followed up by a “Damn girl!” or a less obvious “Hey, what’s up?” Be wary. Continue no contact if you are currently in it and stick to the No-Sex policy if you’ve completed No Contact.
While it is tempting to give in to the physical desires that you and your Ex may feel, this will only result in a Friends With Benefits situation and will leave him with nothing to chase after.
Liking Reason #2: Who are These Guys Liking Her Pic? I’ll just have to sneak on in here…
Men are territorial creatures just as much as they are curious creatures.
If your Ex sees a gorgeous photo of you online he is going to start keeping tabs on it.
As more fellas start clicking that like button on your bomb photo your Ex is going to start thinking.
Wait, he’ll think, who are these guys? Why are they liking her pictures?
His little brain will start to wonder and he’ll think to himself: I know!
This will teach her.. and then bam, there he is.
Liking away for the soul purpose of ensuring that he is the one you’re focusing on. It’s not that he wants you for himself. He just doesn’t want anyone else to have you either. It’s immature and childish and should not be tolerated.
Indications that your Ex may be sending you likes for this reason would be if you notice a sharp increase in the number of women that he is friends with on social media; if he starts posting pictures or tagging other women to try and elicit jealousy on your part; or if he starts injecting certain little remarks into conversation.
Things like “So… Go on any dates lately?” are a sure sign that your fellow is liking out of jealousy.
While this is NOT an indication that he wants to get back together, it is a good sign. Your Ex would not be jealousy if there was no feeling present. In other words, his jealousy means that he cares. The most important thing for you to do in this situation is remain mysterious by not giving flat out answers.
Even if you aren’t dating anyone and all the guys liking your pictures are just friends, he doesn’t need to know that.
Also, do your best to keep your jealousy under control. Recognize that what he is doing is out of pain and that the best revenge is happiness. Starting an argument or throwing out accusations will make you come across as needy and a little crazy.
Liking Reason #3: Leavers Remorse
The other day I bought a dress in a certain color.
When I got home and put it on I realized that I didn’t like the color at all. I instantly wanted the other color that I had seen at the store.
Buyer’s remorse is something we have all had.
Leaver’s remorse is similar.
If your Ex has another woman (or women) in his life and he is dropping likes on your photos he may be experiencing this phenomenon.
In this situation he is regretting his decision to leave one yard for another that’s grass may not be so green.
Again, be cautious.
Men don’t like conflict and they have a nasty habit of avoiding it. While he may be willing to shoot likes your way this does not mean that he is going to drop the other woman and come crawling back.
That being said, it does mean that he is having doubts and those doubts will work their way into the relationship with the new girl and crack the foundation it was built on. Keep doing you and let time take it’s toll on them.
When I realized that I wanted the other dress I took the one that I had purchased back to the store and exchanged it.
Eventually your Ex will do the same with you and the other woman.
Liking Reason #4: Friends Supportin’ Friends
During research for this article I asked an Ex what a reason he might like a photo of an Ex-girlfriend would be.
He stated “well, if we’re friends….”
So there it is, straight from the mouth of an Ex.
Your guy may just be liking your photo because he sees you as a friend and wants to support you as just that, a friend. Obviously, there is no hidden meaning if this is the reason your Ex is liking your picture.
He was just scrolling through his feed saw that his friend (you.) posted a picture and tapped a quick like on it before scrolling on to the next thing. Figuring out if your Ex is liking your photos for this reason is more difficult than the others.
Your Ex will be open to talking with you, he’ll be happy to see you out dating and spending time with others. He may even be receptive to meeting up with you for coffee or dinner. But only because he sees you as a friend and does not have romantic or sexual feelings towards you any longer.
This situation can be particularly painful and feel unfair.
Do your best to maintain your composure and avoid the “How can you feel like this?” conversation at all costs.
If he is purely liking your photos because you’ve been friend-zoned review the EBR material on how to get yourself out of that sticky situation while continuing to enjoy your life and live it to the fullest.
Liking Reason #5: Let The Games Begin
Some men, sadly, are just plain mean. Some men enjoy watching you sweat and like keeping you in a state of constant confusion.
This is cruel behavior… but it happens.
In order to know if your Ex is liking your pictures in order to keep you in suspense you have to take yourself out of the “he wants me” mind set. You have to think logically and learn to evaluate both the good and the bad signs.
It’s so easy to only see the fact that he is liking your pictures and not the bad juju that will come along with this reasoning.
Your Ex will likely come and go. He will like your picture and send you a message saying “cute pic babe” and then ignore everything you say for three weeks.
Do yourself a favor if you start to suspect that your Ex is a game player- step back and restart No Contact.
You deserve more than to be some man child’s toy.
Respect yourself and stop responding to that behavior.
If he is a decent person in anyway he will realize that what he is doing is unfair and will stop doing it.
Liking Reason #6: He Wants You Back
Finally, the reason that we all hope for:
He is liking your pictures because he wants you back.
Don’t stop reading here!
As nice as it would be to know that this is an option and to run with that notion, you just can’t do that. Absolutely do not make the assumption that this is the reason your Ex is liking your pictures.
In fact, until he says the words “I want you back” or some variation of that you should ALWAYS assume that this is NOT the reason he is liking your pictures. The only way that you will be certain that this is the reasoning is if he flat out tells you.
If you assume that he wants you back without him actually stating that he does you are going to be setting yourself up for heart ache and disappointment in the future.
There you have it.
The primary reasons that an Ex will like your photos on social media.
It’s important to note that these reasons are not mutually exclusive. Your Ex could like your picture because of all of the reasons above, none of the reasons above, or any creative mix of the reasons above.
Because of this you need to remain calm and try your best to avoid jumping to conclusions.
But wait! There’s more!
Liking Reason #7: Every Snowflake is Unique
And just like snowflakes, men are different too.
While the reasons above are fairly comprehensive, they will not cover everybody. Unique and varying situations will occur. Maybe your ex only liked your photo because you were wearing a turtle necklace and he really digs turtles.
Maybe your children were in the photo and he liked it only because of them. Use your knowledge of your man and your situation to come up with the most logical explanation for your situation.
It’s also important to note that an Ex may like one photo for one of the reasons above and then like another photo for another reason. People’s feelings are not etched in stone. They are fluid and change at all times. Always reevaluate and take into account your entire situation at the time of the “liking”.
Like so many things in the EBR community patience is ridiculously important. Remain calm and collected if an Ex likes your picture on social media. Recognize that the little notification that you receive from him means that he sees you.
He sees your progress towards happiness and he is either happy to see it or hurting in some way because of it. No matter what the reason for his “like” it is always a good thing and is a tiny victory for you.
But how do you proceed from here?
Ask him why he liked it?
Start sending him hourly messages (because, clearly, he’s looking for that)? Negative. You do nothing. You go out with your friends and let them post more pictures of you living your life happily. Whatever you’re doing now is getting in his head so just keep doing it.
The more positive images that he sees of you the more he is going to think Damn, why did I let her go… I need her back!
(This post was written by Elphie Upland)