By EBR Team Member: Ashley

So it seems really weird that you are in a situation where a person that loved and cared about you so much doesn’t even want to speak to you…

It’s unsettling and hurtful. It’s a difficult pill to swallow, right?

These thoughts are probably going through your head right now…

“Why won’t he talk to me?”

“We’ve known each other for 3 years! We’ve done so much together!”

“How could he just toss me aside like that? He’s told me so many times he loves me!”

You probably spend hours obsessed with what he’s thinking. You are enamored as to why he won’t speak to you.

Unfortunately, this is all very typical of an ex after a breakup.

There are a lot of reasons why your ex may not want to talk to you.

And we will talk about those today, along with some other things.

  1. Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You
  2. What Your Options Are In Dealing With This
  3. How To Make Him Contact You First

Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You

Now I could bust out a long list of reasons covering why your ex might not be cool with talking to you… right now. That “right now” is important. Remember that “right now.” We’ll talk about it again.

Actually, you know what? I AM going to give you a long list of reasons.

You ready?

  • Your Ex Could Be Over You
  • He Could Be Involved In a Rebound
  • It Could Be Painful For Your Ex To See Or Talk To You After The Breakup
  • Your Ex Could Be Mad At You

Now, I want to talk about these for a minute before we move on.

First things first, your ex could be over you.

I put that one first because it is least likely. And it’s the one you are least likely to want to hear. So… it’s out of the way.

Besides, it takes time to get over someone. It doesn’t just happen overnight. Why do you think you miss your ex so much?

If you could will that love for them away you would wouldn’t you?

And what is the one thing people keep telling you it’s gonna take?

Time, right?

And if time has passed it’s still unlikely, because it generally takes a lot of time.

Then, there’s the pain.

Breakups suck, man… for both the Breaker and the Break-ee. (Is that a word? Well, it is now.)

The pain of a breakup can be comparable to having someone you love pass away.

Now, I will venture to say that everyone reading this has lost someone at some point, even if it was a pet.

After a breakup, you start to wonder some things you might wonder if you lost someone,

“Is he gone forever?”

“How can I even begin to move on?”

“I am so heartbroken. Can I just lay in bed and cry all day?”

Well, believe it or not, your ex will go through some version of that too. So, if your ex refuses to talk to you, it could be because he is hurting still from the breakup.

Or, if your breakup was a particularly messy one and he ended up being mad at you, it could just be that he isn’t over that initial anger. This is probably likely if the two of you had a fight or an argument that led up to the breakup.

There is another reason that could cause this communication freeze out. You aren’t going to want to think about this one either.

If he is in a rebound relationship, he might be respecting her feelings or wishes by cutting you out. Which bodes well for you because that means she’s insecure in general, in the relationship, or both. Eventually, he’ll have enough of that. being insecure is not attractive.

No matter what, you have options as to what you can do that will bring him back. If you do it right, you could win him back for good.

Is There A Chance Your Ex Will Take You Back?
Take The Quiz

What Your Options Are In Dealing With This

Aw… guess what… another list!!

  • You Can Chase
  • You Can Beg
  • You Can Wish
  • You Can Pray

OR…

I said OR…

  • You Can Get Him Back

Let me say that again…

You. Can. Get. Him. Back.

Yeah. Yeah. I know that “You Can Chase” one sounds like a great idea right now while you’re missing him. Right?

Wrong!

You shouldn’t chase or beg. And you definitely shouldn’t sit around wishing, hoping or, praying for him to come back.

That last one though… it’s the one.

You should definitely do that. You should definitely NOT do whatever you are thinking about doing. Instead, you should finish reading this article before you do anything.

Let’s get your ex back.

You know what I am gonna say now, right?

Well, if you thought I was going to tell you how to get him back using Ex Boyfriend Recovery tactics… you would be right!

How To Make Him Contact You First

Okay, so your first instinct to make him contact you would be to contact him.

Trust me. I know. I’ve been there.

And I’ve watched thousands of women come through the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Group and every single one of them has that urge to contact their ex.

Can you guess what the first thing I am going to tell you NOT to do?

Our first step of the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Process is actually called No Contact.

If you guessed that it means that you ABSOLUTELY should NOT contact your ex. You would be 100% correct.

At EBR we have three different lengths of time for No Contact based on your specific situation, 21, 30, or 45 days.

If you are missing your ex, everything in your mind will tell you to contact him in some manner.

And I am here to say… that your mind is wrong.

Fight that urge, because No Contact is effective and it will effectively make your ex realize that he misses you too.

During this time, you will want to just sit around and wait for his call. If you do that you will be miserable and you will not get your ex back.

I bet you are wondering,

“what am I supposed to do for 21, 30, or 45 days?”

Well, the answer for that is to become an Ungettable Girl. I know that’s another unfamiliar

Essentially, becoming Ungettable is becoming the best version of yourself.

But if you want a more detailed description here is a link to several articles:

The Ungettable Girl

The 6 Things That Are Keeping You From Being Ungettable

How to Be Confident When You Feel Like Crap After a Breakup

Essentially, during this time you are going to work on a few aspects of your life. We call these aspects The Holy Trinity. They are Health, Wealth, and Relationships.

What you are going to do is make improvements in these areas of your life.

For example, for health you would possibly choose to focus your energy on exercise or nutrition.

For wealth, you might try and shoot for a promotion or a raise. You could learn how to manage your finances. You could make an investment or several.

For relationships, it could be with your family. It could be with your friends. It could be with yourself.

And this isn’t just to fill the time. While you are creating space and distance, your ex will start to miss you. Once you get through No Contact, you get to reconnect with your ex and build rapport with him.

Imagine this. What will be more effective?

“Hi! I’m so glad you agreed to have coffee. You look great. Yeah, absolutely nothing has changed since we broke up. All of those things that led to our breakup that I had a hand in… still here.”

OR

“Hi! I’m so glad you agreed to have coffee. I’m glad to hear that things are going well for you. Things are going pretty great for me too. I’ve really gotten my life together since we split up.”

If you don’t have any improvements to bring to the table, how do you think he’ll react next time you want to get together?

Well…like I mentioned earlier, not caring and living your life without worrying about him will solve most of the question automatically.

But having something to show for your time apart. Man!

He’ll start to wonder,

“Why’s she doing so good without me?”

“Is she better off?”

“Has she moved on?

So, you have No Contact and you can become Ungettable.

But, you can also use the Circle of Influence.

Three people are a triangle… Four people are a rectangle. But five they make a circle… or a pentagon. But, who has time to figure out all those angles?!

Most people have at least five people in their lives whose opinions they care about. They’ll listen to what they have to say even if they don’t like it.

Think about it.

Who makes up your circle of influence?

Your parents? Your siblings? Your friends?

I bet each of those people has asked about your relationship since the breakup. Even if they are trying to be nice and avoid mentioning it, they will eventually. They may have even asked if you had heard from your ex.

But, have you noticed that, when they find out something new about your ex, they always come running to tell you about it?

Well, guess what. Your ex has a circle of influence too and you can use it against him.

If your ex isn’t talking to you it’s likely he also unfriended you on Facebook or unfollowed you on Instagram. He may have even blocked your number if you gnatted him.

Let me define that word there for you because we kind of made it up.

Gnatting (v) to annoy by contact or attempting to contact incessantly.

If he won’t talk to you, how will he see how well you’re doing?

I know, you were probably wondering that yourself. And if you weren’t… well, you probably are now.

So, here’s your answer.

Think about those people in your ex’s circle of influence. Who is your ex most likely to listen to? There should be several.

Now, are you friends with any of them on social media or in real life.

Okay, instead of focusing on whether or not your ex sees your improvements or at least that you aren’t pining for him (and even if you are, just pretend.)

This works amazingly…especially if you have an ex that is so stubborn!

Be careful though.

If you over-post on social media, it will be obvious that you are trying to get someone’s attention.

If you typically post on social media twice a week, don’t post 10 times in one week!

The idea here is to make your ex come to the conclusion, on his own (possibly with help from his Circle of Influence of course), that you are not worried about him and are doing just fine!

I don’t mean to say “Use your friends,” but USE YOUR FRIENDS!

Live the UG (Ungettable Girl) life and hint at those improvements you make on social media.

The UG doesn’t worry about anybody!

At least that’s what you show everyone.

Never mention anything to these friends about your intentions to get your ex back. Don’t post anything that will indicate that you are worried about him or want him back either.

This will do all the damage you need it to do…

He will go crazy about why you are doing so well right after the breakup. He will be frustrated and curious as to how you can handle this so well.

And you know what that will drive him to do?

It will drive him to talk to you!

Once you reconnect with him after No Contact, there is one thing I can tell you. You should watch how comfortable you get with your ex when you do finally talk.

Don’t try and talk about getting back together until he shows interest in getting back together. Trust me, if you have to ask… he’s not there yet.

Constantly asking about the relationship or about getting back together will do the opposite of what you want to accomplish.

Guys have super-huge egos and enjoy feeling like they can have as many women as they want.

Making you feel rejected feeds his ego. It makes him feel as if he can control you.

If you chase after him like that you are giving him permission to treat you however badly he wants. You want to create a challenge for him. You can’t do that if you are constantly pestering him about getting back together.

 

The Take-Away

Okay, now that I have laid all of this out there and given you the resources to follow through on it, let’s recap.

You should now know:

  1. Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You
  2. What Your Options Are In Dealing With This
  3. How To Make Him Contact You First

Now that you have all of this information, you should be all set, right?

Well, even if that is true, I am going to give you access to one more resource… OUR TEAM!!

In the comments below, tell me about your breakup. What have you done since the breakup. Have you gnattted your ex? How extreme has the not-talking-to-you been?

Based on that information, our experts will help determinewhat your best next action should be. And, together, we will have your ex reaching out in no time.

165 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Back But He Won’t Talk To Me”

  1. Lisa

    September 4, 2018 at 7:00 pm

    Hi Chris,

    I have had a three month amazing relationship with my ex. We clicked right away. We dated. We committed to each other. We talked about a future. We often talked about how crazy it was that we both felt so good about each other so fast but because we were on the same page, we trusted it. He was more open about his feelings for me from the beginning and I followed his lead. I felt the same but don’t typically jump in so fast. He lead the discussions in talking about our future. About 2 weeks ago, a couple of nights in a row he seemed not himself. When I asked what was up he responded with a long list of stressful situations he has on his plate and has been dealing with. We had always talked about these situations through our relationship and he always seemed to be stressed but ok, moving forward and happy to have me there by his side. He was very loving towards me and I do believe it was genuine. The issues were all around his separation. He was in the process of buying his ex wife out of their house and running into roadbloacks that were preventing him from doing that and she was putting a lot of pressure on him to get it done as she was putting offers on new homes. The night that he listed his stresses to me one on the list was “my separation”. Up until thay point he always said that the separation had been a long time coming and they were both happier apart. Hearing that his separation was causing him stress, instantly made me feel insecure and I responded with basically a breakup text saying it didn’t sound like he was ready to be in a relationship. He then tried to call me a couple of times to which I did not respond. He then sent me a text saying asking me to please not be upset, he has a lot on his plate that he is trying to get figured out and to please be patient and bare with him and that he will be get it all figured out with a heart emoji at the end. I then did not respond or contact him him for 2 days. When I did send him another message – it was basically accusing him of being just like every other guy, and telling him he broke my heart. Needless to say, once I calmed down, and got my emotions in check, I realized that I had essentially gotten scared by his message and pushed him away. Now he won’t speak to me. I apologized, tried to explain the reasons for my insecurity, and apologized some more. He called me back and said that he was a bit lost himself, he has a lot on his plate and needs time to himself. That he doesn’t feel the same way about me anymore. He was scared about his future. He was also crying and told me he felt sick about the whole thing. I love this man and I want him back. I feel like I made a huge mistake by jumping all over him and I don’t know how to fix it and I don’t know how to reach him.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 4, 2018 at 9:09 pm

      Hi Lisa…maybe you both take some time away from each other to reset. You can give him a heads up that you need some time to heal and work on some things and he would benefit to. I wrote an 247 page eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book” that really gets into depth about this entire process and how you can use it to your advantage.

  2. Summer

    August 31, 2018 at 4:18 pm

    I do apologize for my constant posts, my page wouldn’t refresh and post them. So, my best friend keeps telling me, “he is never going to come back no matter what.” I’m not 100% sure how i should react to that. I have a very slim support system when it comes to personal issues such as a breakup. My ex still does not speak to me. I have a gut feeling he may pursue another relationship already. I sincerely feel like it really may be over. What should i do?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 1, 2018 at 1:14 am

      Best friends are not always best for advice. Go get my eBook and follow the plan I lay out there!

  3. Summer

    August 31, 2018 at 1:41 pm

    My ex wont talk to me, unless of course it is about our daughter. i feel like he doesn’t even look at me. It hurts! Beyond belief. Once he told me that he doesn’t love me anymore, he mentioned that he likes another girl. i know he hangs around her on a daily basis because she lives with some of his friends. He still has me blocked on social media. i am just scared that this may really be over. i just don’t know what to think because i want him back, and i want our relationship back. i am trying not to seem desperate but, he is clearly trying to move on. What do i do!? 🙁

  4. Summer

    August 31, 2018 at 1:25 pm

    My ex broke up with me about a month ago. He told me that he doesn’t love me anymore. Since the initial breakup, we’ve barely talked. Of course, i begged around the first two weeks, and then it all turned into no contact whatsoever. We have a seven year old daughter together, so we only really talk to discuss things about her. He has told me that he has feelings for someone else, and he is trying to figure out how to go about talking to her. i hate the feeling of being replaced! He has since blocked me on Facebook. i hear from some friends about his status updates, and they worry me because i feel like he has lost all interest in me. i want our relationship back, i want him back. i just feel like this may really be over.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 31, 2018 at 1:57 pm

      I think a form of limited no contact makes sense here given the daughter you both have. As I discuss in my program, it is very important to put your efforts around your own healing and involve yourself in recovery activities. Perhaps in time, he will realize how much more he value you, than he realizes. That is part of what NC is about. This interest he has with another woman could be a “grass is greener. Time will reveal. As far as him saying he no longer loves you….you know, I have seen cases where guys just sometimes don’t know their feelings and say things, only later to realize their folly

  5. Hannah

    August 19, 2018 at 10:36 am

    Hi, Chris. I replied before. Exactly two weeks ago. Wow! In those two weeks, I’ve tried to be Strong, walk away and be done with this. His habit of silent treatment really hurts me. And he knows that. No matter what I say to him, I get nothing back, and it’s like talking to a brick wall. I’m at that point where I am done, now. So emotionally and mentally drained. And I think that he likes this. He knows that silent treatment hurts me Nd that is why he unblocked me: because he knew I would try to reach out and that he can give me silent treatment again… You see in those 8 months I was blocked, I made a lot of progress. Even decided to move to a new country, and on the day I got confirmation it was official, I sent a text message just to let him know that I’ll be leaving soon. I had no hidden agenda. Almost immediately, I was blocked and this whole new round of silent treatment started. I care about him, I miss him, my heart yearns for him and hopes for his return. In those 8 months, I dated other men, but never allowed myself to get too close to them because I hoped my ex will come back. And he did in a way: but only to hurt me more.
    I left an essay of a mesage yesterday, And blocked him.
    I leave in a couple of months. Outside of him, my life is awesome. But when it comes to him, I’m so confused, lost, insecure, tired, Nd it’s not the way I usually am.

    I don’t know what to do. I plan to never go down That road again, but I also don’t know if I should still let myself hope he comes back, or if he ever will. He’s a stone wall. And I just don’t know.

    Please, help. You asked me to tap into the resources here, and I read through no contact rules and watched videos on it.
    That’s the way I should go… I just wish things were different.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 19, 2018 at 11:37 pm

      Hi Hannah!

      Glad you came back to visit! I suspect that is the “right” guy out there for you. Have you joined my Private Facebook Support Group. It has about 1900 members and there is a lot of support and idea sharing. You can go to my home page of this site to learn more. Yes, the videos I have on the site can also be very uplifting and get you squared with which direction you want to go in your life…which by the way is forward…not the past. You are a good and decent person Hannah and I have no doubt you will land on your feet and find many meaningful experiences.

  6. Summer

    August 17, 2018 at 4:07 pm

    So, my boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago. He claimed, he doesn’t love me anymore. We were together for 11 years and we have a 7 year old daughter together. Our relationship ended pretty harsh. i begged him to stay, i blew his phone up constantly talking about how we can fix this. He assured me that the initial breakup wasn’t my fault, but that he also feels we will never get back together. i am confused, and still devastated. i am trying to keep my head up and think positive. This past weekend he looked me in my face and said, he doesn’t love me and that he likes another girl, but he hasn’t got the courage up to tell her yet. i am not sure if i should assume she is a rebound, or if he really intends on trying to move on. Our relationship was never peaches and cream…as not many are. We bickered, and we argued. The beginning of our relationship was beyond PERFECT. We had some minor breakups. But over time…he started going out to hangout with friends and not inviting me, leaving me to sit at home alone all the time. He didn’t show any signs of being unhappy, although i began to feel unwanted. i basically worshiped the ground he walked on, and got verbally abused and walked over in return. Parts of me know that myself and my daughter deserve better, but i am 25 and that is the only life I’ve known since i was 14. i just want to know that i have another chance, to rebuild our family, and maybe start fresh. Right now, we do not communicate AT ALL (no texting or calling), and he deleted me from Facebook. He kept me as a friends on Snapchat, and very rarely looks at my story. i am just worried that its really over.He is also 25 but, he has no intent to want to move out of his aunts house, he always buys dirt bikes and childish things. He just overall has the mentality of a teenager, and i have goals of wanting to get my own place, and just make adult decisions. i try to keep in the back of my head that not too many grown women will want to put up with all of that, but EVERYTHING runs through my head a million times a day. i am at a loss for words, and don’t know if i should worry, or believe that i still have a chance. i moved out of his aunts house and in with my aunt, until i get on my feet. i willingly was visiting his aunts house every Friday, so he could still see our daughter but he doesn’t even really acknowledge us being there. Please tell me what i should do.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 17, 2018 at 9:17 pm

      Hi Summer…sometimes guys will utter those words about “not loving”,but more often than not they are only mouthing words, not knowing what they really feel. 7 years is a good amount of time. I am not convinced that it is all over. Take a look at my home page and you will see more information about my program and other tools and resources.

  7. Emma

    August 14, 2018 at 11:33 am

    My ex broke up with me because I am religious and he decided he couldn’t deal with it despite pursuing me for months and months knowing how religious I am. We ended up together for about 9 months before he decided he couldn’t deal with it and ended it. I was heartbroken and wanted him back. He spoke to me all the time despite me wanting space to get over him and before long ended up spending nights together again and being like a couple without the label. Then 3 months after this had been going on and him knowing I wanted him back and us having a number of conversations I found out he had met someone else. He’s been talking to her for the last couple of weeks and I have broken down completely. I feel so hurt and betrayed. I had a message the other day with him forwarding a voice note i sent him months ago just to say how much he liked it. Then bought me some unicorn (I like unicorn stuff – I am a grown up) hand soap a few days later. Needless to say I am massively confused. It’s all come to a head over the weekend when I had a bit too much to drink and ended up crying on his doorstep, we had a chat, he told me he would love me till the day he does but that we can’t be together, he walked me home, gave me the most amazing kiss and went home. 4 hours later I get text message abuse saying he’s fuming and hates me, never wants to see or speak to me again, we are done, his eyes have been opened, &*^k off forever etc you get the idea, with me sending distraught replies. It’s been 3 days and we haven’t spoken. I’m terrified he meant what he said and I’ll never hear from him again. Another point to the saga, he lives 2 doors down, we met when he moved into my neighbourhood. I’m 32 he is 30

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 17, 2018 at 3:06 pm

      I understand why you are confused. His behavior is inconsistent and borderline abusive. You should take a long look at my program as it applies to the no contact rule principle and focus on your recovery and healing.

  8. Karin

    August 13, 2018 at 2:21 pm

    Hello, my ex and I started dating 5 years ago and we broke up 3 years into our relationship. at the beginning of this year he and i became friends again after he ended a relationship. We started hooking up but he ended that when i told him i had feelings for him, but two weeks after he ended it he told me he also had feelings for me and was pushing me away because he didn’t want to hurt me. Then recently he ended things because he didn’t want to be emotionally responsible for someone. He removed me on social media and told me he had no interest in being my friend or anything else (but he told me he did not hate me.)
    We unfortunately work together.

  9. Denisha

    August 12, 2018 at 11:33 am

    Hi, Chris. I told you about my situation with me and my ex and you said he wasn’t sure about who or what he wanted and what’s best for him when he kept saying one thing then he said another thing. He has not contacted me at all ever since he has gotten his number changed two months ago and sometimes I feel he is trying to get back at me in some type of way because I didn’t talk to him for like 4 months last year. He told his sister to tell me NOW that he was done talking to me and told her to tell me that he told me before so why am I asking again and he didn’t tell me a thing especially when I was on the phone with him before he even got his number change and all of a sudden he decided or say he been decided that he was done talking to me before he even got it changed and me and him both know he didn’t up and decide it before then. I don’t understand how you were talking to me about me staying with you and all of the other things then when I don’t do it the minute you asked, you move someone else in to give you the benefits without a ring and you are saying all these other things now. I said no because I wanted him to respect and value me, and for him to understand I will not lower my standards in moving in with him before I got engaged or married to him and that I am not these other women that he use to and I refuse to just do what he says to please him like the other women he is used to and for me to tolerate what they have by letting him get away with a lot with them. I’m honestly lost in this situation because I thought that if I didn’t give in to what he said, he would value me and it would make him want to be with me or do what it takes to be with me but it’s like its the total opposite with him. It’s like he wants a woman to make it easy for him and do what he says when he says it right then and there. I just don’t understand any of it or his behavior. I don’t know if he wants to be serious with this girl or is he just doing it to get back at me. Its like he is trying to portray as his life is so much better without me to where he had his sister tell me that they had moved in together somewhere else and come to find out they didn’t. All of this is confusing and it’s upsetting me because he has said a lot of things and changed his mind so many times and has lied about a couple things making it seem like I’m wrong or desperate when I’m just going by what he has done or said to me. Is he doing all these because he wants the relationship that bad or he just doing it to me because he really doesn’t want me in his life and that’s his way of showing it to me?

  10. Denisha

    August 11, 2018 at 5:51 pm

    Hi, Chris based on what I’ve told you about my situation with my ex and you told me that he was unsure what he wanted or who he wanted to be with based on how he was acting towards me…now he has told his sister to tell me that he is done talking to me. He is saying NOW that he been told that he was done talking to me and he never did tell me that. He would be talking on the phone with me like it was nothing, and not once did he bring that he was done talking to me. Now all of sudden he saying he did and I’m knowing that he didn’t. Because he has really confused me with all this, How do you go from saying one thing to saying another. In this situation, I really don’t know how to react to it and I don’t know if I need to keep pursuing getting him back or not. he that serious this girl about to where he has to act like that towards me or is he just doing for the fun of it.

  11. Hannah

    August 5, 2018 at 3:25 pm

    What if he unblocked you after 8 months, but still refuses to speak to you or respond to you?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 5, 2018 at 6:16 pm

      Hi Hannah!

      That is a positive sign that he unblocked..but clearly you need to turn to your ex recovery plan to deal with trying to get him to be more response. Go to my home page and tap into those resources!

  12. Denisha

    August 5, 2018 at 3:58 am

    I’ve talked about my situation earlier this month. Based on the things I told you do you think that It’s late or that I waited too late to apply these strategies to get him back and that I should just give up the relationship or should I just proceed with the process? Although I feel stronger, I just don’t know and can’t really tell if he wants me anymore and I’m not sure what I should do at this point because I feel that he is really trying to be with this girl because he hasn’t reached out to me to give me his number for us to even get on speaking terms. I just kinda feel I waited to late to try to make the relationship and maybe he just made up his mind that he doesn’t want me anymore.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 5, 2018 at 6:52 pm

      I am glad you are feeling stronger Denisha. That is key! No one knows the future and you can’t control his decisions. But you can continue doing things to become the best version of yourself and embrace an ex recover plan as I describe it on my website and in my eBooks. In time, you will know whether you wish to invest any more of your efforts to try to get him back.

  13. Sara

    August 3, 2018 at 12:30 pm

    Hi Chris.

    I’m not sure what e book you are taking about but no I do not have it.

  14. Sara

    August 2, 2018 at 3:08 pm

    Hello,

    I think I have read just about every article one here. They are really great! I was blindside by my ex about a month and a half ago. He constantly told me how much he loved me and how amazing I was. He’d even post it online. He said I was the love of his life and would be with me always. We were extremely happy. The only issue we had was I would get upset sometimes because at times I would think time spent with his friends was excessive. I’m big on communication so I even brought it up and he said sometimes we would agree to disagree but it was nothing he’d would ever leave me over. Keep in mind this maybe happened two or three times. It wasn’t a daily battle. Then on a family vacation (his family) after a great time and him talking about what we’d do when we got home, he got drunk, I got annoyed and instead of fighting I walked away. His mother then came over and started yelling At me and again I walked away. Wasn’t about to fight with my bfs mother. Well he broke up with me on vacation and I flew home alone. After I got back he showed up. Said it wasn’t about the trip but he could see this relationship going the same direction his last one did. He left without being willing to talk. I called him a few days after. He answered but said he couldn’t talk and he “might call me back” he didn’t. A week or so after that I wrote him a letter “his cousins idea” and she gave it to him. I have been on no contact since (almost at a month). I have never heard from him. It kills me because we had an amazing relationship. I mean every day he told me how much he loved me and how lucky he was. And it all changed I feel because he didn’t communicate how much the friends thing bothered him. Had I known I would have adjusted. I can see where he is coming from. Everyone around me says if he wanted to be with me he would. And if he wanted to talk he would and I should move on. I really love him and saw an amazing future together. Even his parents would say how happy he was. I just don’t know what to do. Give up or keep trying.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 3, 2018 at 12:41 am

      Sara…I can’t remember. Do you have my ebook that deals with breakup matters like this?

  15. Denisha

    July 29, 2018 at 11:36 am

    Hi, Chris although I’m working on myself I just wonder did I wait too late to not only work on myself but to do the strategies and follow the principles to get him back. I want to be with him and I miss him a lot and so much and sometimes I wonder do he even feel the same about . Every since that week his sister hasn’t brought up anything about his relationship. I do believe that he was clueless and didn’t know what he wanted or what was best for him. Do you feel he is still clueless about what he want or is it just that he is sincerely happy because he hasn’t tried to reach out me? Will he ever give me his number and reach out or did Is it too late to try to get him back?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      July 29, 2018 at 3:43 pm

      Trust me Denisha….it is never too later to work on yourself and improve “you”. I talk about that in my ebook in the Chapter about the Holy Trinity. Denisha, have you picked up one of my eBooks that deal with having a game plan or have you taken my quiz and watched my free webinar. There are a lot of answers there!

  16. Tierra L Maynard

    July 29, 2018 at 11:35 am

    He broke up with me the night he landed from our 7 day vacation (his family was there and they took a later flight than me). There was a petty argument and he broke up with me. Part of me was worried because the next day when I sobered up I called and didn’t get an answer. The phone would ring, so I knew he didn’t block me and it lasted for 2 days straight with absolutely no communication. In the past we break up and there is a day we go with talking but not the way he carried things this time. So I sent him a text telling him I would come get my stuff. I did this and he said nothing. When I got there he wasn’t there so I left, then passed him so I turned around. He drives pass his house just to avoid me. That made me feel utterly disrespected so I waited for him to turn around.
    He pulls up and parks. I proceeded to ask him how we got here after a beautiful vacation and all we been through and he says nothing. He just told his family on vacation how much he was in love with me and wanted to marry me. I say well you can get my stuff and I will wait in the car. He went and got my stuff and put it in the car and I said so I can’t get a bye or anything. He says bye. And He continued walking into his house closing the door in my face. I looked over at his car and realized that he still had my parking sticker and a gift I bought from vacation. I knocked on the door and no response. I threatened to call the police because I needed my stuff and he didn’t respond. So I tell him that I will call them and wait in my truck. It got hot and then he puts a note outside his door. I walked up to the door and read the note and it stated ” you have 10 minutes then I’m calling the police. I didn’t fight I just got back in my truck. After maybe 15 more minutes waiting for the police he came outside and just stands on the step looking at me. I walk up and tell him I’m leaving on my own will because I’m better than this. I’m a good woman that has never cheated or lied. He on the other hand has lied and I believe he cheated. On top of that he has a bad drinking problem but I kinda balanced him out. However, if I’m not with him and he gets the urge there is one liquor I told him was forbidden because he turns into a different person (which he had been drinking the night of the break up). Now he has blocked me. I still love him more than words could begin to describe but his drinking becomes too much at times. I just don’t know if he loves me enough to cut back as much as he needs too in order to have a healthy relationship.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      July 29, 2018 at 3:47 pm

      Hi Tierra….there is a lot going on her with your story. I am sorry he blocked you and is treating you so rudely. It is best to have a plan of action on how to deal with all of this behavior. No Contact is one solution, but you need to understand how it all works. Go visit my home page on this site and tap into some of the wonderful resources and products I make available to help people. You first focus should be on your your healing and recovery from all this chaos.

  17. claudia

    May 10, 2018 at 4:57 pm

    So turns out he just got into a relationship and well….. it’s weird because the girl is well…… she tends to cheat a lot and it’s known. so I don’t know what he’s thinking but… . I guess he doesn’t care anymore.

  18. Claudia

    May 5, 2018 at 3:30 pm

    Well Chris,
    I really don’t know what happened but I read an article here about making an ex miss you and well I did the accidental phone call and I apologized and hung up quickly but I guess that was a huge mistake because my best friend, who is friends with my ex, said he got a text from my ex that said to tell me to leave him alone because it’s getting annoying. Now I wasn’t a text gnat, I would text him and he’d respond sometimes and sometimes he wouldn’t but if he didn’t, I was fine with it and I wouldn’t text him back until two days later or more but with a new conversation. I really thought the call would make him miss me a little but to actually make him text my best friend to tell me to leave him alone?! It’s almost like he wants to avoid his feelings or something because why couldn’t he call or text me and tell me that? I just don’t know why guys are confusing.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 5, 2018 at 11:27 pm

      Yes Claudia…us guys can be confusing. I think its because we are a different species! But seriously, it sounds like he needs some space and therefor NC would be in order for at least some period of time. He may not be emotionally ready yet to reconsider getting back. He may have other things go on in his head or life.

  19. claudia

    April 28, 2018 at 8:53 pm

    Hi Chris ,
    Sorry about all the questions but what if texting just isn’t the way to go to get my ex back? Yes, he did text me when we were dating but that’s because we were dating. Before we started dating, we would talk a lot in class or he’d call me on the phone. He really isn’t a texting person and he told me himself in the beginning of poor relationship. Also, he’s stubborn and keeps his mind set on a decision. So, with my situation now, he always answers after the first text sent but then stops or responds but then stops and I’m not sure if the text being interesting is the problem because 1. he’s either busy or 2. he’s either busy that he forgot about the message because he can be forgetful so…… I’m just trying to figure that out. I haven’t gotten my texting bible in the mail yet but I’m trying to figure out if texting would work? what do you think? I know i can’t just randomly text him but i mean i dont know how to get a conversation out of him.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 28, 2018 at 11:30 pm

      Hi again Claudia. Only one way to find out!

  20. Madison

    April 26, 2018 at 3:46 am

    You say throughout this and many other articles that your ex will go crazy if he thinks you’re doing well without him, which in turn will drive him right back to you…but with my ex, his thinking I would be better off without him was a big part in him deciding that we needed time apart. in this case, it seems him seeing me doing great without him would trigger his negative self talk. “See, you really ARE doing better without me. I would just hold you back”. What do I do in this circumstance?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 26, 2018 at 3:07 pm

      Hi Madison…perhaps that is how he might process it. Or he may had said those things, but was just search for words at the time and really isn’t sure what he wants. If there is still a spark there, men usually react with some jealousy and desire when they see you getting alone well without them.

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