By EBR Team Member: Ashley

So it seems really weird that you are in a situation where a person that loved and cared about you so much doesn’t even want to speak to you…

It’s unsettling and hurtful. It’s a difficult pill to swallow, right?

These thoughts are probably going through your head right now…

“Why won’t he talk to me?”

“We’ve known each other for 3 years! We’ve done so much together!”

“How could he just toss me aside like that? He’s told me so many times he loves me!”

You probably spend hours obsessed with what he’s thinking. You are enamored as to why he won’t speak to you.

Unfortunately, this is all very typical of an ex after a breakup.

There are a lot of reasons why your ex may not want to talk to you.

And we will talk about those today, along with some other things.

  1. Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You
  2. What Your Options Are In Dealing With This
  3. How To Make Him Contact You First

Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You

Now I could bust out a long list of reasons covering why your ex might not be cool with talking to you… right now. That “right now” is important. Remember that “right now.” We’ll talk about it again.

Actually, you know what? I AM going to give you a long list of reasons.

You ready?

  • Your Ex Could Be Over You
  • He Could Be Involved In a Rebound
  • It Could Be Painful For Your Ex To See Or Talk To You After The Breakup
  • Your Ex Could Be Mad At You

Now, I want to talk about these for a minute before we move on.

First things first, your ex could be over you.

I put that one first because it is least likely. And it’s the one you are least likely to want to hear. So… it’s out of the way.

Besides, it takes time to get over someone. It doesn’t just happen overnight. Why do you think you miss your ex so much?

If you could will that love for them away you would wouldn’t you?

And what is the one thing people keep telling you it’s gonna take?

Time, right?

And if time has passed it’s still unlikely, because it generally takes a lot of time.

Then, there’s the pain.

Breakups suck, man… for both the Breaker and the Break-ee. (Is that a word? Well, it is now.)

The pain of a breakup can be comparable to having someone you love pass away.

Now, I will venture to say that everyone reading this has lost someone at some point, even if it was a pet.

After a breakup, you start to wonder some things you might wonder if you lost someone,

“Is he gone forever?”

“How can I even begin to move on?”

“I am so heartbroken. Can I just lay in bed and cry all day?”

Well, believe it or not, your ex will go through some version of that too. So, if your ex refuses to talk to you, it could be because he is hurting still from the breakup.

Or, if your breakup was a particularly messy one and he ended up being mad at you, it could just be that he isn’t over that initial anger. This is probably likely if the two of you had a fight or an argument that led up to the breakup.

There is another reason that could cause this communication freeze out. You aren’t going to want to think about this one either.

If he is in a rebound relationship, he might be respecting her feelings or wishes by cutting you out. Which bodes well for you because that means she’s insecure in general, in the relationship, or both. Eventually, he’ll have enough of that. being insecure is not attractive.

No matter what, you have options as to what you can do that will bring him back. If you do it right, you could win him back for good.

Is There A Chance Your Ex Will Take You Back?
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What Your Options Are In Dealing With This

Aw… guess what… another list!!

  • You Can Chase
  • You Can Beg
  • You Can Wish
  • You Can Pray


I said OR…

  • You Can Get Him Back

Let me say that again…

You. Can. Get. Him. Back.

Yeah. Yeah. I know that “You Can Chase” one sounds like a great idea right now while you’re missing him. Right?


You shouldn’t chase or beg. And you definitely shouldn’t sit around wishing, hoping or, praying for him to come back.

That last one though… it’s the one.

You should definitely do that. You should definitely NOT do whatever you are thinking about doing. Instead, you should finish reading this article before you do anything.

Let’s get your ex back.

You know what I am gonna say now, right?

Well, if you thought I was going to tell you how to get him back using Ex Boyfriend Recovery tactics… you would be right!

How To Make Him Contact You First

Okay, so your first instinct to make him contact you would be to contact him.

Trust me. I know. I’ve been there.

And I’ve watched thousands of women come through the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Group and every single one of them has that urge to contact their ex.

Can you guess what the first thing I am going to tell you NOT to do?

Our first step of the Ex Boyfriend Recovery Process is actually called No Contact.

If you guessed that it means that you ABSOLUTELY should NOT contact your ex. You would be 100% correct.

At EBR we have three different lengths of time for No Contact based on your specific situation, 21, 30, or 45 days.

If you are missing your ex, everything in your mind will tell you to contact him in some manner.

And I am here to say… that your mind is wrong.

Fight that urge, because No Contact is effective and it will effectively make your ex realize that he misses you too.

During this time, you will want to just sit around and wait for his call. If you do that you will be miserable and you will not get your ex back.

I bet you are wondering,

“what am I supposed to do for 21, 30, or 45 days?”

Well, the answer for that is to become an Ungettable Girl. I know that’s another unfamiliar

Essentially, becoming Ungettable is becoming the best version of yourself.

But if you want a more detailed description here is a link to several articles:

The Ungettable Girl

The 6 Things That Are Keeping You From Being Ungettable

How to Be Confident When You Feel Like Crap After a Breakup

Essentially, during this time you are going to work on a few aspects of your life. We call these aspects The Holy Trinity. They are Health, Wealth, and Relationships.

What you are going to do is make improvements in these areas of your life.

For example, for health you would possibly choose to focus your energy on exercise or nutrition.

For wealth, you might try and shoot for a promotion or a raise. You could learn how to manage your finances. You could make an investment or several.

For relationships, it could be with your family. It could be with your friends. It could be with yourself.

And this isn’t just to fill the time. While you are creating space and distance, your ex will start to miss you. Once you get through No Contact, you get to reconnect with your ex and build rapport with him.

Imagine this. What will be more effective?

“Hi! I’m so glad you agreed to have coffee. You look great. Yeah, absolutely nothing has changed since we broke up. All of those things that led to our breakup that I had a hand in… still here.”


“Hi! I’m so glad you agreed to have coffee. I’m glad to hear that things are going well for you. Things are going pretty great for me too. I’ve really gotten my life together since we split up.”

If you don’t have any improvements to bring to the table, how do you think he’ll react next time you want to get together?

Well…like I mentioned earlier, not caring and living your life without worrying about him will solve most of the question automatically.

But having something to show for your time apart. Man!

He’ll start to wonder,

“Why’s she doing so good without me?”

“Is she better off?”

“Has she moved on?

So, you have No Contact and you can become Ungettable.

But, you can also use the Circle of Influence.

Three people are a triangle… Four people are a rectangle. But five they make a circle… or a pentagon. But, who has time to figure out all those angles?!

Most people have at least five people in their lives whose opinions they care about. They’ll listen to what they have to say even if they don’t like it.

Think about it.

Who makes up your circle of influence?

Your parents? Your siblings? Your friends?

I bet each of those people has asked about your relationship since the breakup. Even if they are trying to be nice and avoid mentioning it, they will eventually. They may have even asked if you had heard from your ex.

But, have you noticed that, when they find out something new about your ex, they always come running to tell you about it?

Well, guess what. Your ex has a circle of influence too and you can use it against him.

If your ex isn’t talking to you it’s likely he also unfriended you on Facebook or unfollowed you on Instagram. He may have even blocked your number if you gnatted him.

Let me define that word there for you because we kind of made it up.

Gnatting (v) to annoy by contact or attempting to contact incessantly.

If he won’t talk to you, how will he see how well you’re doing?

I know, you were probably wondering that yourself. And if you weren’t… well, you probably are now.

So, here’s your answer.

Think about those people in your ex’s circle of influence. Who is your ex most likely to listen to? There should be several.

Now, are you friends with any of them on social media or in real life.

Okay, instead of focusing on whether or not your ex sees your improvements or at least that you aren’t pining for him (and even if you are, just pretend.)

This works amazingly…especially if you have an ex that is so stubborn!

Be careful though.

If you over-post on social media, it will be obvious that you are trying to get someone’s attention.

If you typically post on social media twice a week, don’t post 10 times in one week!

The idea here is to make your ex come to the conclusion, on his own (possibly with help from his Circle of Influence of course), that you are not worried about him and are doing just fine!

I don’t mean to say “Use your friends,” but USE YOUR FRIENDS!

Live the UG (Ungettable Girl) life and hint at those improvements you make on social media.

The UG doesn’t worry about anybody!

At least that’s what you show everyone.

Never mention anything to these friends about your intentions to get your ex back. Don’t post anything that will indicate that you are worried about him or want him back either.

This will do all the damage you need it to do…

He will go crazy about why you are doing so well right after the breakup. He will be frustrated and curious as to how you can handle this so well.

And you know what that will drive him to do?

It will drive him to talk to you!

Once you reconnect with him after No Contact, there is one thing I can tell you. You should watch how comfortable you get with your ex when you do finally talk.

Don’t try and talk about getting back together until he shows interest in getting back together. Trust me, if you have to ask… he’s not there yet.

Constantly asking about the relationship or about getting back together will do the opposite of what you want to accomplish.

Guys have super-huge egos and enjoy feeling like they can have as many women as they want.

Making you feel rejected feeds his ego. It makes him feel as if he can control you.

If you chase after him like that you are giving him permission to treat you however badly he wants. You want to create a challenge for him. You can’t do that if you are constantly pestering him about getting back together.


The Take-Away

Okay, now that I have laid all of this out there and given you the resources to follow through on it, let’s recap.

You should now know:

  1. Why Your Ex Doesn’t Want To Talk To You
  2. What Your Options Are In Dealing With This
  3. How To Make Him Contact You First

Now that you have all of this information, you should be all set, right?

Well, even if that is true, I am going to give you access to one more resource… OUR TEAM!!

In the comments below, tell me about your breakup. What have you done since the breakup. Have you gnattted your ex? How extreme has the not-talking-to-you been?

Based on that information, our experts will help determinewhat your best next action should be. And, together, we will have your ex reaching out in no time.

198 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Back But He Won’t Talk To Me”

  1. Avatar


    March 5, 2019 at 3:26 am

    I had a break up 3 weeks back and of course I am hurting real bad. We dated for 8 months and it was really good and we had a great time.i thought he was the one and he loved me a lot and initiated everything.He broke up with me because he is leaving the country for a dream job and all i wanted was for us to make most of our time in the next 6 months till he left and may be try long distance. I love him very much and do want him back but he won’t even talk to me until I initiate. I am trying no contact but there isn’t much time.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      March 5, 2019 at 4:41 am

      Hi Mandy….I am sorry your are hurting. There are alot recovery activities I talk about in my Program that could help. Indeed, the most important thing one should focus on after a breakup is their healing and recovery because without that, we are a mess. Take a look at some of my resources as I think they will help you a lot!

  2. Avatar


    January 27, 2019 at 6:47 am

    My boyfriend or ex boyfriend ( now I guess lol ) has been dating talking since almost 10 months. It’s a long distance relationship and we haven’t met each other yet but we had a plan to meet up on my birthday which is on February 21st. We had small arguments but my bf was taking them too far and that caused so much problems into our relationship. Every time I wanted to communicate with him, he was telling me that I’m very petty and immature. in every arguments , he was cussing me out and calling me names and made me to do stuff I didn’t want to do but i did everything he made me to do in the past 9-10 months because I love him. He promised me that I’ll be his forever and he’s be only mine and suddenly, it’s been almost 3 weeks, he started ignoring me out of nowhere and I tried to speak to him but he refuses to talk to me. I asked him why are you ignoring me and he said that I’m a very petty person and immature and I need to grow up then he’ll talk to me normal. He asked me to leave him alone and I did! I stopped texting him and calling him but he was snapping me because he didn’t want to lose the streak we had. I messaged him and said there’s no point for us to keep a streak when you don’t want to talk to me and he deleted me off snap right after I said that to him. I don’t know if he broke up with me completely or not. At this point I’m just so confused and don’t know what to do. Any advices ?

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    January 16, 2019 at 1:12 am

    We broke up on our 4 year anniversary per his suggestion. There werent any initial clear reasons for the break up. We had been arguing a lot and we’ve “broken up” a few times before but never for more than a week and once before at the very beginning for about a month (We’re both in our 20s I’m away in college so it’s hard to keep a long distance relationship alive sometimes). But there had been some major blows to the relationship leading up; nothing along the lines of cheating or abuse. But he liked to drink, we both did and sometimes we’d drink and do damage to the relationship, there have been times where we would drink and then an argument comes and it just got volatile between us. We’d say things we don’t mean and Sometimes he’d get so drunk, he’d literally have a nervous breakdown bc he’d been using drinking as coping mechanism for so long so he often would get so drunk anything would trigger him & he couldn’t control himself. Every time he’d have an “episode” we followed the same cycle: I’d say I didn’t want to deal w/ this anymore, he’d say leave then but of course I wouldn’t or I would but come back after clearing my head. He’d say after he’ll stop drinking and I’d believe him and he would for maybe a week or 2. We would often get through an activity of drinking with no issues but he was easily triggered when he drinks so I never could tell until the night was over and had gone smoothly. Sometimes it was just too much but I couldn’t leave him b/c I felt like he just needed someone to love him inspite of his deep rooted emotional demons, he had a rough life but we both did. I believe We both love each other very much and had a great relationship but there were a lot of emotional issues which ultimately caused the break up. I didn’t always feel supported by him emotionally (he was a great boyfriend outside of that) and he always made me feel like my emotional shortfalls or feelings were foreign to him. we loved each other but couldn’t meet each other in the middle with communicating. The final blowout came on our anniversary. I wanted to stay home but he wanted to go out to the bar so we went. Drinking insued (lots) and the night was coming to a perfect close when some girl started talking crap to him ( I wasn’t actually standing there so I’m not sure what she even said) but he told me and I didn’t intervene I actually walked away from him and not for any particular reason but I just didn’t wanna have drama and I was drunk. Well that triggered him emmensly, we began to argue and he said that I never stood up for him which made me feel awful bc I had been by his side and looking out for him Since we met, and yet he said that’s how he felt bc of this one girl and he said I’d done it before but it’s said because that’s how I felt emotionally like he was never there for me. He left that night and drove home and I spent the whole night begging him to talk to me. We spoke the next day he said that he wished I loved him and I just felt so defeated bc none of it was true I had said and done things before that may have left questions but I’m human and I’m not perfect I never betrayed his trust or cheated and I was always there for him even before my own self sometimes. We didn’t speak after that and He broke it off officially a few days later, he said that he hadnt been happy in a while and every time we “worked things out” they’d crumble again which I guess is true but I felt like we never really worked things out to begin w more like glazing over them and the biggest obvious issue: the drinking. but he just won’t acknowledge that which sucks bc I think if we both stopped drinking we could truly have a beautiful relationship. He initially suggested a break or a break up but I don’t really believe in breaks or trust them so I angrily agreed to the break up. Of course I was devasted about 6 days went by he texted me to talk about our phone plan together and how we would break that down. I of course brought up the relationship to no response. A few days went by and I got drunk smh and gnatted him to the point he blocked my number I just kept begging him to talk to me and tell me how to fix it. I won’t be contacting him again bc now I just feel so emotionally drained from the whole ordeal I cried every day/night for literally 2 weeks straight. I love him very much and I know we both have some growing to do but I’m going to focus on myself. I do hope deep down there’s still hope for him, hope for us. Is there?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      January 16, 2019 at 4:01 am

      Hi Jessie…It is best to pull the focus on you and getting emotionally healthy.

  4. Avatar


    December 28, 2018 at 7:32 pm

    We were to get her just over 2 years.. I cheated.i lied and went on a date with another guy and kissed him… I came clean about it.
    Now, he wants nothing to do with me. Hes told me it’s over for good and can never been intimate with me again or ever trust me again. He’s blocked me and won’t speak to me.
    I’m a wreck. I know I made a mistake.
    I broke NC 2x within the first 1.5 week but decided to respect his request for space and began NC 12/21..He stopped by my house yesterday to return my belongings.
    I ran into him as I pulled into my driveway. And he made the comment the he had hoped He wouldn’t run into me. He didn’t want to talk and told me he was uncomfortable and things were still too fresh.
    Along with my things He made sure to put in our both of our Christmas stockings , which felt like a slap in the face. And a clear indication he wants nothing to do with me.
    What do I do? Will he ever reach back out or is he really done? Do I have a chance? Do I initiate contact after NC period or just put the ball in his court?
    I want to work things out But i feel so hopeless

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 29, 2018 at 2:17 am

      Hi Kris!

      So we all make mistakes. Learn from the past, but move forward. Sometimes giving each other time and space is the best medicine, so I agree with implementing no contact, but do it in the way I teach it in my Program and all the other things too.

  5. Avatar

    Amy carver

    December 28, 2018 at 11:39 am

    Hello me and my ex has been together for three year’s and I have four children all together one is his and she only one about a week ago I went to pick him up from work and he got into my car smelling like hevey weed I got very emotional and he was lieing to me about it so I got mad and as we was driving and agurment he was on his phone talking to his dad telling his dad I’m a MF and this is what he has to deal with all the time I got more upset cuz he was lying so I pulled my car over and to him to get out out and to give me my phone he started yelling at me too his lungs I said I Don’t care just get out he did and started walking and I drove off we haven’t talk till tonight and the only reason why is because I dropped him a bday gift off at his mom’s but didn’t see him or talk just left he texted said he thanked me and he asked what I was doing I said I was at a friend’s house and then he SAID HAVE FUN WITH UR NEW BOYFRIEND and I was at a girl’s house and he stopped texting me what can I do to get him to realize I love him And tried and I care . He won’t talk now and he won’t text he won’t even call his daughter didn’t spend Christmas with her didn’t call her nothing please tell me what I should do please to get him bk

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 29, 2018 at 2:23 am

      Hi Amy!

      Sounds like you could use an ex recovery plan. Do you have my eBook?

  6. Avatar


    December 27, 2018 at 1:45 am

    I am a wreck my bf and I have been together 11 years and we been through a lot together I supported him for so long. We had arguments a long the way but usually resolved in a day or two. Just over a week ago had massive argument I was at fault caused embarrassment to him and myself . He ended it. I tried to resolve but he couldn’t forgive me and said enough is enough. I not heard from him for over week. I’m struggling but trying the no contact but to be honest he already doing this to me. Any advice I’m trying to move on but finding it so upsetting I’m devastated. Do you think after 11 years no contact would work ?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 27, 2018 at 3:42 am

      Hi Rebecca!

      Hange in there Rebecca…you are going to get thru this. There are a ton of resources on my site that can help you in the healing and recovery area. 11 years is a good amount of time….roots get laid down…traction is established….all of which can act as an invisible force that can pull you together. So, allow No Contact to settle things down and use it to heal and focus on reinforcing your value and all the other things I talk about in my Program.

  7. Avatar

    Kelly Rose

    December 19, 2018 at 12:31 pm

    My ex and I dated for 3 years. a month ago I noticed a change in behavior, he started visiting less, texting less. When I asked him about it he said he is under a lot of pressure at work I tried encouraging him and be as supportive as I could, helping him job hunt. A few days I confronted him about ignoring my text not calling like he use to, telling him that he is different and doesn’t do the things he use to this all under a months time. he then said he knows and he needs to change and we can work on us. I agreed and asked if there is anything he would want me to change in behavior his response was no. Then in a just a few day he told me he needed space again I then told him lets take a full break of 30 days and he agreed. A few days after that I found out he has been flirting in a sexual nature with 3 other girls I know of in the course of our relationship. I never saw this coming and was devastated, however I pulled myself together and approached him about it and he cried telling me he is disgusted in himself and I told him if he can promise me to that those flirtation will stop and it wasn’t more then that I forgive him and we can work on moving forward. He agreed and kissed me and hugged me and apologized. The very next day he told me he wants us to break up and he cant forgive himself for what he did to me. I didn’t see this coming I asked him how can he simply just throw away the life we built the plans we made and he told me he just wants to be alone. My heart is so broken and I think this is the hardest break up I ever had to deal with simply because I didn’t see it coming because our relationship was so damn good, he was my best friend my everything and I’ve lost him. We have been broken up for 2 weeks and he blocked me and has not made contact since like I never existed in his life, like this 3 years never happened.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 20, 2018 at 2:55 am

      Hi Kelly!

      I know you are hurting. Take a look at my Program. Its meant to help you in the hurt department, but also provide you a road map on how to proceed. You seem ot be a good candidate for implementing No Contact.

  8. Avatar


    December 2, 2018 at 1:25 am

    Hi, my ex and I were together for nearly 5 years. He has some issues from his childhood which he tends to block out with alcohol. At first I didn’t speak to him for 6 or so weeks (hoping he would stand on his own feet). Then out of the blue he sent two texts saying he still loves me and always will & that he’s met someone. He then came to collect his stuff and was very defensive and looked like crap (up all night drinking). After he left it it hit me and hurt. So I tried to contact him a few times and he blocked me (even appears to have changed his number). I’m devastated and want to talk to him. I’ve started no contact and intend to send a platonic Christmas card. What do you think ? He doesn’t have any social media at all or his friends. Thanks

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 2, 2018 at 2:24 am

      Hi Angela….5 years is meaningful in that it is traction and can come into play later. Yes, no contact can help in many ways. Be sure to roll it out in the way I teach it in my Program. Hop on over to my home page to learn more about all the resources and tools available to you!

  9. Avatar


    November 29, 2018 at 6:03 am

    As I said below, I’m coming up on 2 months NC. Part of me wants to reach out, but I think if he’s deep in this relationship he won’t be willing to talk to me…but if I wait til they break up that could be a long time.

  10. Avatar


    November 28, 2018 at 6:40 pm

    Since my ex won’t talk to me and is in a ‘serious’ relationship (with a girl he met after me), and he doesn’t have me on social media, how do I even begin? Playful texts won’t work here. Do I leave it and hope he messages eventually while moving on? Or can I get a little more hard-hitting with getting back in touch?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 29, 2018 at 3:42 am

      Hi Helen….Ummmmm consider giving this a bit more time, then try reaching out to explore his intentions….then if necessary roll into NC

    2. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 29, 2018 at 3:42 am

      Hi Helen….Ummmmm consider giving this a bit more time, then try reaching out to explore his intentions….then if necessary roll into NC

  11. Avatar


    November 27, 2018 at 1:22 pm

    Hi, I do not have him on any social media and we were chatting strictly via sms. Been in a long distance relationship for a year and I would constantly travel to his place. He broke up with me via sma and he told me seeing each other was a bad idea. I tried to contact him and he never replied back. I miss him and it hurts. It’s been 2 weeks now. He never told me the reason why he thought this relationship won’t work in the long run. I always want to contact him but I feel like I should respect his decision and I have to give him his space. I only hope he comes back because I totally lost alot of things in these past 2 weeks.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 27, 2018 at 11:37 pm

      Hi Gloria!

      I do think employing NC can help you on the personal side and also potentially help you in the ex recovery area. There are a lot of resources that I make available on my Home Page that can help you in many respects….so feel free to explore my Program.

  12. Avatar


    November 26, 2018 at 11:22 pm

    The problem is I don’t have him on social media so my tools are limited. He only has instagram but he has me blocked. The only way I know about his ‘forever’ comment is through his girlfriend’s insta. My only way to contact him is via Whatsapp, where he hasn’t blocked me. And keeping the door’ ajar’ is just what I want! I am trying to move on and I know I cant put my life on hold, but I don’t want the door to slam shut, but I know that this is a lot more delicate than any situation I’ve had in the past, especially as I think I remind him that he has a lot of stuff to deal with. He and this girl have gotten serious very fast. I just don’t think he’ll talk to me- any good tips on this?

  13. Avatar


    November 26, 2018 at 8:34 pm

    So I have your book and I’ve been continuously working on myself as suggested, but my ex is still with this other girl and he recently commented on her social media that he can’t wait for them to be together forever. That’s pretty strong considering less than 3 months ago he was with me. Can I still count this as a rebound? I’ve done nearly 2 months of NC but all of the tips suggest he’ll be open to talking to me. I don’t think he wants to because I remind him of his issues. How can I work around this? It’s impossible to build attraction if I can’t even speak to him.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 26, 2018 at 10:50 pm

      Great job Helen….I am proud of you for working on being the best “you”. That is so so important. I wouldn’t put a lot of stock on things said on social media. There could be an underlying strategy for him using such flowery language. There is an approach I called, “Being There”. Its not foolproof…nothing is…but sometimes a break will come with your ex realizing the grass is not greener. Its similar to moving on without moving on. Don’t put your life on hold for this guy, but you can keep the door ajar if you are seeing signs of him coming around. Have you tried building attraction thru social media….or jealousy?

  14. Avatar


    November 25, 2018 at 9:45 am

    my ex decided to end tinz with me cause I said I can’t settle down in less than three years and we have been together for four months that he wants me to chase my dreams,that he has lost interest and since then he as ignored me for over 4 months now and I haven’t reached out to him cause am scared of rejection and what he will say to me,bt I still want him don’t know what to do. and his a kind of man that doesn’t go back to his ex,and sticks to his words.

  15. Avatar


    November 6, 2018 at 4:35 pm

    Will do! In the meantime, is there anything I can do since he has me blocked on social media? I’m worried this relationship will end up turning serious and I don’t feel I can contact him. Bit helpless.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 6, 2018 at 10:33 pm

      Guys often will unblock after some time. They are notorious for social media stalking at some point in time. Pick up a copy of my eBook, “The No Contact Rule book” as it goes over so many things, including what you should do during NC to build value and attraction and also do things for yourself.

  16. Avatar


    November 5, 2018 at 2:55 pm

    Not sure she’s a rebound girl…they met after he and I did but he’s gone to visit her several times now. She’s definitely serious about him. Not a rebound but he has a lot of things to work through before he can be in a healthy relationship. Case in point- I saw in one photo that he was drinking red wine. He hates red wine, he’s told me many times. I think he’s using this relationship to run from his issues so he’s being who she wants him to be. In this case, do I have to wait until he contacts me first?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 5, 2018 at 9:27 pm

      Well if he is running away from his emotions and issues….then this gal could be a rebound girl. Pick up my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”. Its massive in lenghth (485 pages) and will walk you thru the entire NC process and what to do when its time to reach out and so much more is discussed. Best to have the best ex recovery plan in place to help your chances.

  17. Avatar


    November 5, 2018 at 6:10 am

    Hello Chris,
    I dated my Ex for 8 months and we were in a lovely relationship. We clicked right away because we were open and we talked about everything. We dated. We talked about our future. We trusted each other. Within the 8 months we’ve had minor break ups over issues which doesn’t need to break us up. And all the break ups were coming from her. Anytime she breaks up with me, I will then call and text her several times to make amends and get back together with her again even if I wasn’t the one at fault but I only do that to save my relationship. My Ex has this mood swing behavior, she will be very happy with you today and just tomorrow she will be mad and do not want to talk about anything. I will ask her what the problem is and she will either tell me family issues, or nothing is wrong with her but I shouldn’t worry cos she will be alright. Just before the break her mood came again and she didn’t feel like talking to me and I asked what was wrong but she kept on saying nothing. Then she said “she personally doesn’t understand me because she will tell me everything and I will turn around later to ask her what’s wrong with her so I should leave her alone. I should leave her alone, she wanna be alone.” I asked if she’s tired of me? because I don’t it don’t understand why she was doing that and she gladly said maybe.
    so I called her in 4 days time to check up on her, and in the course of our conversation she said she’s no more interested in the relationship and dont wanna be with me again because I’ve hurt her. I got quiet for some minutes and said OK. and when we hanged up she blocked me and we’ve never talked again. I wonder what the problem is and why she did that….

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 5, 2018 at 9:39 pm

      Hi Brandt!

      Sorry your ex has a lot of mood swings. Perhaps something can be done for that if she needs treatment. So maybe a break will be good. Have you though of implementing No Contact. Go to my home page and read up on the various resources and tools available to you. It’s best to have a sensible ex recovery plan.

  18. Avatar


    November 5, 2018 at 1:05 am

    My ex and I split up in September when it transpired he had another girlfriend in a different city. He has a lot of mental health struggles and debt but I see now that he’s been flying to visit this girl a lot. Obviously getting back together isn’t on the cards as he has this new girlfriend, but I fully believe he’s just trying to avoid his problems and is using her as an emotional crutch. I want to help and just talk over our relationship and I’ve been working on healing. I tried messaging him last month but he said it caused him anxiety and that he’s not ready to talk. I’ve done NC for a month as of this week, should I leave it longer? I don’t want to spook him or be ‘that crazy ex’, but I miss having his friendship.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 5, 2018 at 4:54 am

      Hi Helen!

      Maybe a rebound girl. Not sure. Proud of you for working on your healing and recovery. That is so important. Feeling empowered is key. Yes, maybe a bit longer on the NC. Be sure to use the tactics I talk about in my program as discussed in my eBooks and guides and videos!

  19. Avatar


    September 4, 2018 at 7:00 pm

    Hi Chris,

    I have had a three month amazing relationship with my ex. We clicked right away. We dated. We committed to each other. We talked about a future. We often talked about how crazy it was that we both felt so good about each other so fast but because we were on the same page, we trusted it. He was more open about his feelings for me from the beginning and I followed his lead. I felt the same but don’t typically jump in so fast. He lead the discussions in talking about our future. About 2 weeks ago, a couple of nights in a row he seemed not himself. When I asked what was up he responded with a long list of stressful situations he has on his plate and has been dealing with. We had always talked about these situations through our relationship and he always seemed to be stressed but ok, moving forward and happy to have me there by his side. He was very loving towards me and I do believe it was genuine. The issues were all around his separation. He was in the process of buying his ex wife out of their house and running into roadbloacks that were preventing him from doing that and she was putting a lot of pressure on him to get it done as she was putting offers on new homes. The night that he listed his stresses to me one on the list was “my separation”. Up until thay point he always said that the separation had been a long time coming and they were both happier apart. Hearing that his separation was causing him stress, instantly made me feel insecure and I responded with basically a breakup text saying it didn’t sound like he was ready to be in a relationship. He then tried to call me a couple of times to which I did not respond. He then sent me a text saying asking me to please not be upset, he has a lot on his plate that he is trying to get figured out and to please be patient and bare with him and that he will be get it all figured out with a heart emoji at the end. I then did not respond or contact him him for 2 days. When I did send him another message – it was basically accusing him of being just like every other guy, and telling him he broke my heart. Needless to say, once I calmed down, and got my emotions in check, I realized that I had essentially gotten scared by his message and pushed him away. Now he won’t speak to me. I apologized, tried to explain the reasons for my insecurity, and apologized some more. He called me back and said that he was a bit lost himself, he has a lot on his plate and needs time to himself. That he doesn’t feel the same way about me anymore. He was scared about his future. He was also crying and told me he felt sick about the whole thing. I love this man and I want him back. I feel like I made a huge mistake by jumping all over him and I don’t know how to fix it and I don’t know how to reach him.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 4, 2018 at 9:09 pm

      Hi Lisa…maybe you both take some time away from each other to reset. You can give him a heads up that you need some time to heal and work on some things and he would benefit to. I wrote an 247 page eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book” that really gets into depth about this entire process and how you can use it to your advantage.

  20. Avatar


    August 31, 2018 at 4:18 pm

    I do apologize for my constant posts, my page wouldn’t refresh and post them. So, my best friend keeps telling me, “he is never going to come back no matter what.” I’m not 100% sure how i should react to that. I have a very slim support system when it comes to personal issues such as a breakup. My ex still does not speak to me. I have a gut feeling he may pursue another relationship already. I sincerely feel like it really may be over. What should i do?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 1, 2018 at 1:14 am

      Best friends are not always best for advice. Go get my eBook and follow the plan I lay out there!

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