I Want My Ex Back But He Wont Even Talk To Me

402 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Back But He Won’t Talk To Me”

Staci

March 25, 2018 at 4:11 pm

We initially started fighting beginning of November because i took a text typo and made it a big deal. Things became good then a bigger fight. And things got ugly! Neither of us gave in so things got worse. We did not celebrate our year and half anniversary due to the anger. I was so upset.

Finally when i was ready to put this past me. Something he was asking for the entire time but i couldn’t forget what was said. All he replied with was he’s glad. He was preoccupied with his friends. Christmas he only sent me one message. In between Christmas and New Years i sent him so many happy loving messages. Called him to and from work like i used to always. No reply. He replied once saying he’s busy with work.

Right before New Years he tells me he doesn’t have the spark for me anymore. After the fighting and everything. I was devastated. I begged and pleaded but to no avail. I even wrote a heartfelt card and sent a gift because i wanted to show we could still celebrate the holidays and our anniversary still even though it passed. He said he appreciated the card but wished i didn’t send anything because we aren’t together. He told me maybe in the future but now he’d like to be friends.

I began my first no contact period beginning on January when he failed to inform me of our dinner plans. I tried to see him since December was a hard month he never got back to me. He blew up my phone via text and call the first week. He saw i was reading and not replying since it was through what’s app. He expanded on how much he loved my card. I ended up breaking it and calling him back the end of the week. Still going on about how he wanted to be friends. I said i can’t be your friend but i still tried. Again, it was me reaching out to him and hardly anything from him.

Began my second no contact 30 day period. He texted me the end of the first week. I didn’t reply or open it immediately. He saw i opened it and kept checking what’s app until he finally deleted the app. I posted a selfie of me with make up on and then my drinks on Snapchat story. He ended up blocking me and his friend deleted me. I was also posting inspirational and relationship quotes on Snapchat so maybe he was tired of that.

He didn’t contact me again. I texted him after 30 days no reply. Not sure If I’m blocked. I sent him a bday card mid February. He Facebook messaged me saying he appreciated the card and we very briefly chatted. I even left a birthday voicemail. Not sure if it was received it rang normally and then said the number was unavailable beep.

Then week later i did a good reminder text. I said “do you remember which restaurant we went to before the laker game ? I am hoping to take a friend there.” He wasn’t happy and said he didn’t need to know i was taking “a friend”.

Then two weeks later I’m doing another good reminder text all i say is “hi! Guess where i just dropped my brother off at!?” Boom! Blocked! No reply.

He calls me right away and says Look just leave me alone. Leave me alone. Haven’t i told you before?! All i could mutter was ok and yes to the question.

What does this mean? Why this anger? It’s March now. Last we spoke on the phone in January it was friendly. What do i do now?

Chris Seiter

April 3, 2018 at 1:17 am

So, the anger from him I’d say is completely normal. In fact, I wrote about it recently in a post where I was talking about pendulum swings and how often it is for an ex to go from one end of the spectrum to the other.
Stacy

April 5, 2018 at 4:28 am

So what do I do now? Do I have a chance?
Chris Seiter

April 5, 2018 at 11:51 pm

You certainly have a chance!

But I lost context of the conversation we were having. Do you mind helping me?
Stacy

April 6, 2018 at 1:13 am

I said: “We initially started fighting beginning of November because i took a text typo and made it a big deal. Things became good then a bigger fight. And things got ugly! Neither of us gave in so things got worse. We did not celebrate our year and half anniversary due to the anger. I was so upset.

Finally when i was ready to put this past me. Something he was asking for the entire time but i couldn’t forget what was said. All he replied with was he’s glad. He was preoccupied with his friends. Christmas he only sent me one message. In between Christmas and New Years i sent him so many happy loving messages. Called him to and from work like i used to always. No reply. He replied once saying he’s busy with work.

Right before New Years he tells me he doesn’t have the spark for me anymore. After the fighting and everything. I was devastated. I begged and pleaded but to no avail. I even wrote a heartfelt card and sent a gift because i wanted to show we could still celebrate the holidays and our anniversary still even though it passed. He said he appreciated the card but wished i didn’t send anything because we aren’t together. He told me maybe in the future but now he’d like to be friends.

I began my first no contact period beginning on January when he failed to inform me of our dinner plans. I tried to see him since December was a hard month he never got back to me. He blew up my phone via text and call the first week. He saw i was reading and not replying since it was through what’s app. He expanded on how much he loved my card. I ended up breaking it and calling him back the end of the week. Still going on about how he wanted to be friends. I said i can’t be your friend but i still tried. Again, it was me reaching out to him and hardly anything from him.

Began my second no contact 30 day period. He texted me the end of the first week. I didn’t reply or open it immediately. He saw i opened it and kept checking what’s app until he finally deleted the app. I posted a selfie of me with make up on and then my drinks on Snapchat story. He ended up blocking me and his friend deleted me. I was also posting inspirational and relationship quotes on Snapchat so maybe he was tired of that.

He didn’t contact me again. I texted him after 30 days no reply. Not sure If I’m blocked. I sent him a bday card mid February. He Facebook messaged me saying he appreciated the card and we very briefly chatted. I even left a birthday voicemail. Not sure if it was received it rang normally and then said the number was unavailable beep.

Then week later i did a good reminder text. I said “do you remember which restaurant we went to before the laker game ? I am hoping to take a friend there.” He wasn’t happy and said he didn’t need to know i was taking “a friend”.

Then two weeks later I’m doing another good reminder text all i say is “hi! Guess where i just dropped my brother off at!?” Boom! Blocked! No reply.

He calls me right away and says Look just leave me alone. Leave me alone. Haven’t i told you before?! All i could mutter was ok and yes to the question.

What does this mean? Why this anger? It’s March now. Last we spoke on the phone in January it was friendly. What do i do now?”

You were talking about his anger is normal and is related to an article where you discussed a pendulum.

I recently sent him an email well yesterday apologizing like trying to make amends. He read it no reply. Like i can’t get him to reply to anything. What do i do?! How do i have a chance if he won’t talk to me?! This man once loved me so much he couldn’t imagine being a part from me. Please help me. I know this was our worst fight but i thought we would get through it together.
Chris Seiter

April 7, 2018 at 4:42 am

So, I am actually not a huge fan of apologies. To me what always tends to work best is action.

Show him through action.

Also, I know it’s very hard but try not to let your emotions get the better of you and act on impulse. I feel like your ex would respond to you better from a position of power as opposed to a position of weakness.
Stacy

April 8, 2018 at 4:31 pm

How do i show him through action? I am basically blocked everywhere and he won’t speak to me. Do you think the friend comment upset him or the fact i blatantly ignored him when he what’s app me during my second attempt at no contact? I don’t understand why he’d get upset at me ignoring him when he did the same basically. It’s crazy how a person who used to love me so much is now someone who i can’t get to speak to me. Do i still have a chance to turn things around?
Chris Seiter

April 11, 2018 at 2:02 am

Yep, there is always a chance. But I hear what you are saying. He needs to cool of for a spell, before you reach out later
Stacy

April 15, 2018 at 9:01 pm

For how long? I did one 30 day no contact. Then reached out to him. By my third good memory reach out (this was the one after the one which made him angry and jealous). He blocked me and called me to leave him alone. I did another 30 day no contact period. He never contacted me during these two periods. He contacted me after my first attempt of no contact and i gave in. After my final no contact period i sent a clean slate/apology for my behavior email. He opened it but no reply. What do i do? How much more time do i give him to cool off? I wish he’d talk to me.
Chris Seiter

April 18, 2018 at 3:56 am

Hi Stacy…thanks for the clarification! You certainly have given him time. Turn the focus on you and working on being the best version of yourself. Invest in yourself. The future is often like blur. We cannot know how it is going to fall in place when it comes to matters of relationship. So it is best to be pragmatic and proceed with moving forward with your life, without any expectation that he will be part of your future. Neither of us know that for certain and you have made good faith efforts to re-ignite the spark. Perhaps he will move on and you will move on. Or perhaps he will see you are getting along just fine with out him, and that might spark something. But moving forward and embarking on your own path is a good pragmatic way to live your life.

Bhawna

March 24, 2018 at 8:08 am

Hi,

My boyfriend broke up with me 3months ago for another girl but i am still thinking about him wants to talk to him and want him back but he said that he loves me not anymore and he blocked me on fb ,Instagram but not on whatsapp …after that i was applied the no contact rule post some pictures of mine looking happier at all in my whatsapp status and he saw my status daily but suddenly he blocked me there last night could u tell me what should i do ?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 29, 2018 at 7:23 pm

Hi Bhawna,

Just let him be and keep posting in fb and ig if you have accounts there and keep your posts public.. How long have you been improving yourself and being active in posting?

Taylor

March 23, 2018 at 1:40 pm

Hello,

My boyfriend broke up with me last week out of nowhere after about 3 months of being together. He’s been going through a difficult time and told me I deserve better (that’s also what he told one of his friends who reached out to me to see how I was doing). That night I texted him asking if we could talk and he never responded and I haven’t attempted to contact him since. We had a good relationship and while we had a few conflicts we always talked through them, never had any full blown fights. I don’t believe there was any other hidden reason behind it other than he’s been really down lately and hasn’t had the energy to do anything but go to work and sleep (some of my friends think he might be slightly depressed). I don’t know why he won’t talk to me, I just want to get him back. Right after the breakup we hugged and he held me really tight like he didn’t want to let go of me. I feel like there’s hope, but at the same time there was nothing I could say to convince him to change his mind. I’m hoping that doing NC will help him miss me, but I’m worried it won’t and that he’ll move on. We had so much potential for a long, wonderful relationship and I want him to see that we should give it another chance. Is there any hope for us?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 28, 2018 at 6:33 pm

Hi Taylor,

I think there still is.. Have you tried our quiz?

Josie

March 23, 2018 at 2:03 am

I broke up with my boyfriend of 9 months. We had been planning on moving in together after our anniversary and even planned a trip for our anniversary. One day I was just so frustrated with family issues, work and school (I’m 27 yrs old) I hadn’t seen him in over a week because I went on a trip without him. Anyway, I was off work and was supposed to meet with him to spend the weekend together but I was having the worst bitchy attitude and texted him that I wasn’t happy. His reply was that he didn’t know how to respond to that. Then I said I don’t want to do this anymore. But I didn’t mean it!!! And he barely spoke to me after that. He was very short he said he was hurt and didn’t know what to do. I text him I love him and he said it back so I thought we would fix things. Then we were suppose to meet up to talk but he canceled on me…since He told mutual friends that I broke up with him and even asked one of my gfs to give me my things that were at his place… which made me upset. I asked him one day if I could pick up my things and he said he wasn’t home or he’d bring hem to me… I blew up his phone after that. I texted and called so many times asked him to forgive me or even tell me he’s over me and to move on. I asked for some type of closure but I haven’t heard anything back. I haven’t seen him for 3 weeks now and I miss him so much. I took our relationship for granted and I regret the text I sent him that day…please help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 28, 2018 at 6:16 pm

Hi Josie,

Start the nc rule.. Since you haven’t spoken to him in three weeks, just extend to two more weeks. Be active in improving yourself and in posting..

Jess

March 22, 2018 at 4:45 pm

Hi – i have been dating a man for the last year. We have had the most amazing time of my life. He was doing all the things that led me to believe he was all in. Saying he was all in in fact. well about three weeks ago, i asked him really where do we stand – does he love me? It was like i shot him. He got ttotally scared to death and started falling off right then and there. I gnatted him – and i’m so sorry i have. Only for about a week, but it got him to tell me he was sorry but he wanted to end it. I have been in No Contact for four days. What would you suggest for a time length to leave him alone. I honestly don’t really even know what happened. so very sad

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 28, 2018 at 5:51 pm

Hi jess,

Try at least 30 days

Janet

March 21, 2018 at 10:37 pm

I have done the entire 45 day process to a tee. Now how do I break the no contact.

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 27, 2018 at 12:47 pm

Hi Janet,
Check this one:
How To Properly Start A Conversation With Your Ex After No Contact

Mariene

March 21, 2018 at 2:51 am

Hi, my ex and i actually broke up 8 months ago while we both were gonna start in college in different cities. It was his idea and I was devastated. But not a day gone since that day we didnt talk. We met we visit eachother. It was great until 3 days ago we called it off. He said he doesnt love me like he used to and he doesnt wanted a commitment because I was so jealous of his friends over there coming to his house all the time. As a tag “we werent in a relationship for 8 months “ but actually we were. We were just staying that we broke up but still seeinf eachother. Today I called him crying and begged him to talk to me like we used to. He said “I dont want to anymore this is best for both of us I dont want to live with your boundaries and this makes both of us very sad”. I asked him If he missed me or is he sad because I was dying from crying. He said “no i dont feel sad and no i dont miss you” but he said he missed me 5 days before that.. “i have to end it now i have a friend to come over today this is my last decision i dont want it evet again you cannot force me to be in something that i dont want to” I was crying like hell and he said “ bye gotta go” and he is gone.. It hurtts so much please help me I dont think this NC will work for me because we ve been together for 2 years and then we broke up and contuined like bestfriends in love for 8 months and then he ended. Please help please …

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 26, 2018 at 10:51 am

Hi Mariene,

nc helps increase your chances but it doesn’t promise that it will work 100% in any situation.. And besides, you’ve stayed in touch but it didn’t help right? He probably thinks you’re just chasing him and if you’re sleeping with him, that means you’re friends with benefits.

Mack

March 21, 2018 at 12:34 am

We broke up and he will not tell me why. He thought I was clingy but wouldn’t ever tell me to my face. He likes another girl and I heard he doesn’t love me anymore. Our relationship was great and he just broke up with no reason. I tried to talk to him but now, I don’t think I want to. We had a fight about why he won’t tell me why. He’s acting like he is full of himself. I just want it to be back to normal.

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 26, 2018 at 10:45 am

Hi Mack,

when did you break up? Are you going to do the nc rule?

Kim

March 18, 2018 at 1:45 pm

My ex broke up with me two weeks ago. He suffered a lot from paranoia if I was on nights out with friends or out of town (I never gave him any reason to feel this way as I was very loyal to him throughout our year and a half relationship). It resulted in many arguments once I got home after a night out and he often lost his temper and acted irrationally.

I saw him after and he told me he didn’t want to lose me, I was the best thing to ever happen to him etc but he just needed space. I originally agreed but the next day I felt uneasy so I told him we either had to be together and work through it or not be together. He chose NOT to be together. The following day he blocked me on all social media and I text him to ask why, he said it was because he didn’t want to see what I was doing as it would make him upset. I then saw him in person to get my things back a few days later and asked him if he definitely didn’t want to give us another go. He said he didn’t want to try again as although he loves me and cares for me he felt so much happier in himself as he didn’t have to experience the paranoia feelings of wondering what I was up too because he couldn’t see anything. He asked for a cuddle etc which we did and he told me he loved me, I then said goodbye and he said “bye for now”. To which I scoffed at a bit but then left.

I have now been doing the no contact for 5 days. I have been very active over the past 2 weeks, having even attended a ball on a Friday where I have had numerous comments on my photos that I looked absolutely gorgeous. I have set most my profiles to public so if he decides to unblock me but not friend me he will still be able to see what I’m doing.

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 24, 2018 at 4:44 pm

Hi Kim,

If he’s being like that because he’s insecure, check this one:
EBR 052: Insecure Ex Boyfriends And How To Handle Them

Kinga

March 18, 2018 at 7:51 am

Hi,

My boyfriend broke up with me because I’ve got quite a few personal problems, and that he doesn’t think he feels the same about me. After the break up he blocked me on Fb, snapchat but not instagram. When I asked to get my stuff, he caused a massive argument and doesn’t let me pick up my stuff as when ever I ask for it he just ignores it and says he doesn’t particularly want to see me. What should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 22, 2018 at 6:17 pm

Hi Kinga,

when was all that and how important are your stuff? Do you really need to get them immediately?

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402 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Back But He Won’t Talk To Me”