You always hear me talking about “The No Contact Rule” and how great it is.

Heck, I’ve written close to twenty articles covering it throughout the history of this website.

I’ve even done my own independent studies where I have looked through my individual success stories helping women get back with their exes and determined if the no contact rule was a major factor in that success.

Hint Hint: It is as I found that over 70% of my successes have utilized the no contact rule in some way, shape or form.

But you want to know the one thing I have never done before?

I have never compiled those success stories in one place and dissected them for you.

Until today!

Honestly, I don’t know why I didn’t think of this sooner.

I guess I am going to have to give credit to the women who are a part of my private support group who are constantly yearning for proof.

You see, they want to see the no contact rule work more than anyone as most of them are literally in the middle of one as we speak. To them it’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

I have always felt that my big claim to fame as a breakup consultant is the fact that I think I have more success stories out there than anyone.

And today I am going to prove it by showing them to you!

But first, go pick up a copy of my popular ebook, “The No Contact Rule Book”

The No Contact Rule Success Story #1: Anna

Some of the more well read readers of this article may recognize the name “Anna.”

Well, that’s because I have her success story posted throughout the site and even did a real interview with her here.

But I suppose you want the proof, eh?

So, let’s get to the fun part and dissect this situation for a second.

My wife Jennifer and I helped Anna out a lot (not that she needed it she’s a total badass.)

Breakdown of Her Situation

  • She was in a long distance relationship
  • She was engaged to her ex
  • She was in the middle of NC
  • The was something VERY important she needed to get at her exes house

And that’s where our story is going to pick up.

You see, I learned a long time ago that there are certain circumstances where it’s ok to break the no contact rule quickly if you have important items that you need to retrieve from your ex.

That was the case for Anna so she was allowed to break the no contact rule.

What I wasn’t counting on was that it was during this interaction of getting her items back from her ex that she got him to ask her to be back.

Here Is My Hypothesis On Why The No Contact Rule Worked

We know that she was in the middle of the no contact rule (17 days to be exact) when she was forced to get her things back from her exes place. Now, while Anna was totally freaking out about it (watch the interview) her ex was probably doing the same thing.

17 days of silence is a long time for a man and while he hadn’t reached out to her (again watch the interview). I am betting it was some type of ploy on his part to see if she’d reach out to first.

As every day passed and she didn’t reach out he became more and more agitated, slowly realizing just how much he missed her.

It all came to a boiling point when Anna had to get her things from him.

Seeing her was probably just too much and he had to have her back.

Now, Anna deserves all the credit for her killer strategy of seeing her ex in person (again, watch that interview) but I think the no contact rule definitely enhanced it because it worked him up and made him realize just what he had lost.

No Contact Rule Success Story #2: A Random Girl From Our Support Group

So, while success story #1 was about a woman who got her ex back I’d like to switch things up a bit and talk about some of the amazing things that the no contact rule can make men do.

 

So, here is the lowdown on this situation.

This woman was in the middle of the no contact rule when she heard her doorbell ring.

She went to see who it was she was greeted to a flower delivery man with a note from her ex.

Remember, she is in the middle of the no contact rule and he asked her on a date!

So, what do we think happened here?

My Hypothesis For Why The No Contact Rule Worked

The “NC” has a funny way of bringing out what we are really feeling.

But here is the funny thing.

Women often take a short sighted view on this.

They fail to realize that the no contact rule isn’t only affecting them, it’s affecting their exes as well even if it doesn’t seem like it is.

I’ll give you an example.

Women will often ask me,

Chris, what if he doesn’t contact me during the no contact rule? Does it mean that it’s not working?

I can’t tell you how many success stories I have come across where this has happened (look at no contact rule success story #1.) Usually all it means is that your ex is one stubborn SOB and he has resided himself to making you be the one to contact him first.

Click To Pick Up Your Copy of My eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book”

But I am getting off topic here.

In this particular circumstance this woman used the no contact rule on her ex and if affected him so much that he felt the need to send her flowers and ask her on a date.

Now, was it only because of the no contact rule that he did this?

No, I think it would be arrogant of me to say that.

Instead, I think it’s a testament to how great this particular woman’s relationship with him was. It was so good that it made it easy for him to miss her and he took action to win her back.

No Contact Rule Success Story #3: The Never Initiated Girl

Now, I don’t want you to be reading this and get a big head that this is a typical result because it’s not.

However, every once in a while we get a pretty awesome NC success story like this,

So, this one is pretty straight forward.

When it comes to the no contact rule I usually recommend three different time frames.

  1. The 21 Day Rule
  2. The 30 Day Rule
  3. The 45 Day Rule

Now, to be perfectly honest with you I can’t remember exactly which no contact rule time frame that this particular girl chose but one thing is for sure.

Even after her no contact rule time frame was up she didn’t initiate a conversation with him at all.

She simply waited and he came to her and asked for her back.

In other words, the only actual strategy she tried that I recommended was the no contact rule. Therefore we can assume that the no contact rule played a huge factor into her success.

My Hypothesis For Why The No Contact Rule Worked For Her

Are you beginning to see a common theme among our success stories?

It seems like a lot of the men who come back to their exes as a result of the no contact rule begin missing them in an extreme way.

And if I were a betting man that is what I would say happened here.

It’s a case of a man being left alone with his own thoughts for a long time and coming to the realization of what he lost.

No Contact Rule Success Story #4: Jessy

Jesse has a really interesting story in the fact that SHE was the one who broke up with her ex.

You see, Jesse had been married before and thought that she was ready for the next step with her boyfriend at the time and believe it or not he agreed. However, she asked him to go to couples counseling with her so they could make sure they resolve any issues they had before they entered into a life long commitment.

Well, as I am sure you can imagine that didn’t go over too well with her boyfriend and he broke up with her.

That’s when Jesse found Ex Boyfriend Recovery and well, just watch.

If you want to learn more about her situation without watching the whole video I recommend you read the post I wrote on her here.

But here is the quick cliff notes version.

  • Jessy did the 30 day no contact rule
  • Even though it went against what she thought was right she decided to reach out to him first
  • He told her immediately that he was glad she reached out.
  • He missed her so much
  • Blah, blah, blah
  • Now they are married!

Like I said, read the article I wrote on them!

Free On Demand Coaching
Yes, please

Why The No Contact Rule Worked On Jessy’s Ex

I have a lot of data on this particular success story as it relates to the no contact rule since I did an hour long interview with Jessy and got to hear exactly what her ex said to her after she reached out to him post NC.

This is a quote from our interview,

So, I later learned that in his mind he was like, “Fine, if she’s not going to contact me, as much as my heart is hurting, I refuse to contact her.”

So, what we have here is a stubborn ex who put his foot down and decided to not contact her during the no contact period no matter what.

But what is interesting is what he did once she contacted him.

It’s almost as if instantaneously he switched gears and went from the “I’m not going to contact her” mentality to the “I miss you so much” mentality.

Again, our common theme comes up!

No Contact Rule Success Story #5: Jellybean!

And for our last no contact rule success story of the day I thought we would do something fun and go “old school” by picking one of the comment success stories from the old version of our website.

I’d like to introduce you to Jellybean,

Jellybean is actually one of my favorite success stories to quote for a couple of reasons,

Firstly, it shows how capable my team is at helping you guys when I can’t.

 

Secondly, who can say no to someone named Jellybean?

Alright, so here is the breakdown of her situation.

After the breakup with her ex boyfriend Jellybean did what most women tend to do.

She went crazy trying to beg and plead for her ex back. However, eventually she came to her senses and decided to implement the no contact rule. Once she did that and really spent her time focusing on making sure she was doing it properly she started to see some success.

Eventually her ex asked for her back and they lived happily ever after!

Actually I haven’t heard from Jellybean in two years so I am assuming they are still together.

How can I make that assumption?

Well, usually if people have a positive experience on this website they will visit it again once they go through another breakup.

Anyways, Why Did The No Contact Rule Work For Jellybean?

I think the important thing to note here is the fact that Jellybean did not follow the EBR breakup protocol of immediately jumping into the no contact rule.

Instead, she did what most women do unfortunately.

She begged…

She pleaded…

She cried…

She basically did everything she wasn’t supposed to do.

Now, by doing that her ex boyfriend started to make certain assumptions about her.

Assumption #1 = She misses me more than I miss her

 

Assumption #2 = She is a little over emotional

 

Assumption #3 = I am winning the breakup

Now, I may not know much (lie) but one thing I do know is that men often don’t take their ex girlfriend back when they make these assumptions.

But Jellybean did a really smart thing.

She got really serious about the no contact rule and jumped right into it and slowly but surely his assumptions started getting replaced with these,

New Assumption = Maybe she doesn’t miss me as much as I thought…

 

New Assumption = Maybe she isn’t as over emotional as I thought…

 

New Assumption = I am losing this breakup…

And I think we all know what happens to a man once he has these assumptions.

97 thoughts on “A Comprehensive List Of No Contact Rule Success Stories”

  1. Jules

    February 16, 2019 at 7:04 pm

    Hey Chris,

    so my guy broke up with me 4 days ago. We weren’t officially together and in the last few weeks (we had exams) he just wasn’t sure of our “thing” anymore. We still hung out and studied together but more as friends.. so on Wednesday our holidays started and I didn’t want to leave like that and asked him whether he wants a relationship or not and he was still not sure but ended it because he didn’t want me to wait and get my hopes up. I understand that and I respect his decision. We both cried a lot during the break up, bno shouting, no bad words, only tears. I didn’t beg him to reconsider because I know it doesn’t help. He said things like he wants to stay friends blah blah because he likes me so much as a person and he wants to keep doing the things we did together (cooking, sports,…) but I guess time will tell if he really meant it. I just thanked him for everything he did and to take care and not do anything stupid..
    So here I am. I didn’t contact him or anything, it’s very hard. But I don’t want to ruin anything ..
    We are going to see each other inevitably when university starts again in the middle of March – so it’s the perfect time for NC.
    I miss him terribly but I do need to work on myself and figure things out as well. I’m just afraid how it’s going to be when we see each other again.. will he reach out to me before? Does he miss me? And what do I do when I see him again and everything just hits me again?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      February 17, 2019 at 1:08 am

      Hi Jules!

      So you clearly have a solid plan in wanting to roll out NC and focusing on being the best “you”….not for him…but for you. To tap into my Program, you can pick up my epic long eBook, 485 page “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”. Those questions and more will be covered and will give you more confidence as to how best to move forward.

  2. Katie

    February 3, 2019 at 3:01 pm

    Hi, Chris,
    My story is a little odd. I’d been seeing a guy for 6 mos exclusively, though we hadn’t put a label on it. We were taking it slow. The last few weeks of it, things started moving forward and we’re going great. He told me he was almost ready, was calling me just to hear my voice, telling me he missed me, needs me in his life, super affectionate, talking about getting me a key to his apartment and keeping stuff there, said he wants to see me more often and one day if we were to eventually move in together. Everything was going great and promising. Then I got a FB message from his crazy ex gf asking if I was seeing him. She had been contacting him and he told her he was seeing me. I didn’t engage in conversation with her and told him she messaged me. Then the next day, he told me he needed a break and that he cares about me but is messed up. He had told me for weeks that he didn’t deserve me and he is not worthy of my love. He went right back into saying that and said he wants to be with me but doesn’t deserve me. Please help me! I started NC two weeks ago. I messaged him only a couple times after the break up because I had questions but didn’t beg. He still kept saying he doesn’t deserve me. When a I told him i wasn’t going to chase him, he said “just let me get my bearings.” Please help me understand.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      February 4, 2019 at 3:57 am

      Hey there Katie!

      It sounds like your ex’s ex has gotten into his head, but my guess is she is his ex for a good reason and in time he will see the light. Meanwhile do all the things I teach in implementing the No Contact rule. Pick up my 485 page ebook so you are fully equipped with a sensible blueprint of how you manage this post breakup period.

  3. Fati

    January 17, 2019 at 9:48 am

    Hi, i need some help my bf and i were in relationship gor 1 year now, at first everything was good, until problems start to came up, 1st time he used the silent treatment on for no reason just because his mad we talked after 2 week and from this things got worst, he so busy with his work he start to lose intrest in me i was the was always asking him out, call him, text him…. When things go worst with him he go silent and told me nothing about it and for i go miserbal to not hear from him so i let him cool off then we talk after a period of time. Now its been 6 months that we are like that and lately i told him to break up and he said nothing about it first he was reading my text follow my statut and now nothing, i want to use the NC rule but i’m not sure if he will contact me or not am not even sure if were breaking up he alawys choose to silent than talking, i want to get things better and i really don’t know what to do with him anymore

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      January 17, 2019 at 6:54 pm

      Hi Fati! Sometimes if what you have tried in the past hasn’t worked its time to try a different approach and No Contact may very well be the right medicine. Check out my Home Page for details on all the resources I offer to help you thru all this.

  4. Isabel

    January 14, 2019 at 10:26 am

    Hi Chris,
    I am currently doing NC and i am 14 days through.
    When you go on one of those texting/call apps like Viber or Whatsapp, it shows when the person was last on the chat, Example: “Last seen at 11:30 pm”. I did check out of curiosity to see if he’s been going on the chat a lot more than he usually does, checking to see if I’ve texted- and he has, but he can also see when I was on the chat. I checked maybe five times in the last week. And he then knows that I’ve been checking and looking on the chat and thinking about him, etc. Therefore I am not completely ignoring him, right? Does this mean I’ve broken NC in a way?
    WHAT DO I DO!?!?

    Isabel

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      January 15, 2019 at 4:32 am

      Hi Isabel..Probably best for your emotional well being not to be checking up on him. Stick with your NC and do the things I teach in my Program

  5. Chelsea

    January 10, 2019 at 11:36 pm

    So Iv been having a difficult time with my break up. We were together for 5 years and engaged for a year and half. The break up was his idea. I was in denial and we stayed living together for the first 2-2 1/2 months of being broken up with back and forth emotions and confusing until yesterday I finally made the leap and moved out to a friends place for now. I haven’t gotten all my belongings yet but have enough to last for awhile. I was doing a lot of reading and realized I finally needed to take the leap and do the NC rule but I also needed to do a clean slate text, so I did. This is what I sent “Hey, I’m just texting you to apologize for the way I acted about our break up. It was selfish of me trying to fix things when all you wanted was to be alone. Thank you for being patient with me through all of this. Hope your day is going well.” And he responded unexpectedly. It went something like this, “No need to apologize. I understand where your coming from and I promise you I’m not mad at you and I don’t resent you. You have showed me a lot of love through out the years. You’ve also been put through a lot. I’m sorry for some of the decisions I made that hurt us. You were right. I should’ve let them go along time ago. I should’ve been more selfish. And I’m sorry for bringing you all the way out to Texas just to have this be the result.” Long story short his family has been living with us for the past 3 years which resulted in the arguments we gotten into and stress into our relationship. I’m clueless on if I should respond at all because in all honesty I wasn’t expecting him to reply. I really have a lot of hope for us and I’m hoping time apart is what we need. I just need some guidance on where to go from here.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      January 11, 2019 at 12:36 am

      I am sorry Chelsea this breakup has been hard on you. The heart of my Program is your personal recovery. And I have lots of tools and resources to help you with that. Check out my 245 page eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book”. Pick up my flagship product, “PRO” and learn about the healing power of the Holy Trinity of Your Personal Recovery. I will send you a free eBook about that if you come thru my Contact Form and request it.

  6. Tina

    January 3, 2019 at 1:40 am

    Hi Chris,
    My bf of 4 years broke up with a week ago. I did go N.C. straight away however i acted irrationally begged plead and asking for chances right after he broke up with me. Then before NYE I sent him a clean slate message saying apologise for my behaviour during the relationship and how I acted after broke up with me and thank him for everything and agreee with the break up. Then continue with the N.C. again, what do you think the chances of getting him back after sending him a clean slate message. I felt like in broke the N.C. I felt confident when i started it straight away after the break up but after sending the clean slate message I feel like I Im back to square one.

  7. Abc

    November 27, 2018 at 7:49 am

    Hi….I need some help ….he loves me and want to marry me but I messed up by behaving rudely with him in front of his sister.his sister told his family about it and now they are against our marriage…he said he can’t go against his family so he broke up with me …. what should I do

  8. JanetD

    October 31, 2018 at 7:46 pm

    I ended things two days ago because he has some serious psychological issues he needs to work on before he can be with anyone (anxiety, insecurity, maybe even some body dysmorphia). I’m hoping he’ll start seeing a therapist like he mentioned when we talked but I really miss him. I’m doing NC because I know if I stay with him he won’t get help. My question is this: do I end the NC or wait for him to? If so, how long do I give it?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 1, 2018 at 2:51 am

      Hi Janet!

      I am glad you are in NC. You need to focus on “you” I would suggest you pick up one of my eBooks so you can be up to speed on this whole post breakup process. Its just far too much to cover in this forum

  9. Kay

    October 26, 2018 at 10:57 am

    I need some advice please…….
    my partner of 3 and a half years (we were engaged) has throughout the year taken many ‘breaks’ away from me, usually no explanation & I beg for understanding which makes things worse. he can go days without any contact. He used studies as an excuse for some ‘peace’ we were due to marry in april but he called off the wedding due to family influences and finance issues. I accepted but was heartbroken and had to cancel everything alone. Since then he went on his breaks leaving me in limbo, things got better eventually and I felt we were ok but he changed and I felt taken for granted and still felt almost part time in his life…… the weekend he made promise to see me but bailed and lied about where he was and it hurt a lot so I sent upsetting messages about how he made me feel. He then told me he wanted a break to be alone no contact. I again asked for explanations and he said I caused drama….. so my question is what do I do here? do I now implement the no contact myself for more than the 2 weeks? what if he contacts me in the next 2 weeks? do I need to tell him I am implementing this? I am so stuck what to do but need something to happen to make him appreciate me more. Thank you

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 27, 2018 at 2:27 am

      Hi Kay!

      My honest advice is you would be well served by picking up either my 485 page eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” or “The No Contact Rule book” as it will answer all those questions and more. I so much wish I had the time here to cover everything, but the explanations are detailed. I also have resources on the site that can guide you.

  10. Shannon

    October 14, 2018 at 3:27 pm

    Hi Chris! I’m on day 25 no contact..I have not heard from him…He has broken up with me once before months ago and I hardly had to do anything..he went one day without contact and then chased me..wrote me a sweet email..this time I haven’t heard a word from him getting a little worried…Think I should do just a little over 30 days? I did begg and pled and I got mean to? Not sure what I should do now…the day after I wrote an email saying sorry then went into no contact…He blocked me on social media which he’s never done with me…we dated for 9 months…is this hopeless?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 14, 2018 at 9:09 pm

      Great job Shannon with pushing forward on NC. Its not unusual to not to hear from the guy. Some of them are stubborn. Maybe 35 days. Never say never. Every breakup situation is different.

  11. Eboni

    September 6, 2018 at 7:24 pm

    My friend basically told me that there is no hope in winning my ex back…should I just give up…?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 7, 2018 at 3:39 am

      Hi Eboni…my experience is friends are usually not the best source of advice on breakups. Better to be guided by an informed ex recovery plan. Go to my home page and check out some of the resources and tools there!

  12. Crystal

    July 27, 2018 at 10:01 am

    So me (f23) and my Ex (m24) Started going out a year and a half ago. Things were great except for the fact that we both knew that I was going to be moving about 3 hours away. He didn’t want to continue to a long distance relationship but he cried and told me he didn’t think he would start caring for me this much. We were both super sad but he helped me pack and said that we would put a pin in it. Come to find out he didn’t want to and I did some really stupid things. I traveled down for one day to see him without telling him. I told him that I cared too much for him and was thinking of moving back down since I didn’t want to go to the school I was planning on going to anymore (deferred for a year, lost passion, WAY too expensive). I was scared he was going to be angry but he wasn’t (until later) he said that I should stay up there and that he thinks that with me, a year would be doable. I would then move back down and yeah. Unfortunately we have had ups and downs doing long distance. I would visit more often then he would and he told me he didn’t have the urge to do so. I’ve hurt him too, telling him I didn’t have that same giddy feeling for him after about a year or so, but I was just over anxious and such. Anyways, we were okay, we’ve taken breaks here and there to kind of plan what we want to do when I get back. There was a time we were becoming distant or felt disconnected. We kind of avoided it at first but then we talked about it, thought about it for a day and then talked again. We agreed that the long distance was to blame and to see what happens when I get back down there (made me super happy). fast forward about half a month now and we are still a bit distant. I was kind of okay with that because I was moving back down really soon and I could just talk to him in person, but then one night he told me that this was like he was on a treadmill that he wanted to get off of. It was stressful and we were both exhausted and tired. This conversation led to him saying that he doesn’t think I am the one for him. He says he loves me and cares greatly for me, and not at a friend, but he just doesn’t know. I mentioned a breakup and we both kind of agreed that we needed to grow but now I am moving back (we broke up on Monday and I am moving back Thursday). I really wish to speak with him or to clarify that I still want to be with him but I also wanna give him space. We’ve taken breaks so many times though so I don’t know what to do now that we actually broke up. I need some advice. I really care about him and miss him dearly. I felt so hurt when he was crying while we were having this conversation.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      July 27, 2018 at 9:34 pm

      Hi Crystal!

      Maybe for now, just take some time and space for yourself as much as for him. You have you own healing curve and there are things you can do to help with making him see your value in his life, but sometimes you have to be apart for it to be appreciated. I get into all this in my ebooks which you should consider. “The No Contact Rulebook” would be a good resource for you. Also keep reading my posts and podcasts as you will find help in getting you thru this.

  13. Star

    April 25, 2018 at 1:26 am

    I’m on the same boat as Jellybean. I was with my boyfriend for nearly 5 years before he broke it off. Unfortunately, I begged and pleaded and made a total fool out of myself for 3 days, and I ended up getting blocked from everything except imessage. However, today I am in the 2nd week of NC and I have strictly stuck to NC. I’ve even made sure to keep up happy vibes on social media, so that he wouldn’t know that the breakup is affecting me anymore. I noticed that he unblocked me from social media, but he hasn’t contacted me. I also heard from mutual friends that he is starting to feel a little lonely. Given my situation (with the begging and pleading for 3 days), should I wait 30 days or 60 days before reaching out?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 25, 2018 at 2:52 am

      Hi Star! Don’t be too hard on yourself…everybody makes plenty of mistakes during breakups. The fact you guys have been together for around 5 years is really a positive if most of that time was positive. Getting blocked and feeling lots of emotions is par for the course. People seem to do that more now. Its kind of a passive aggressive way of pushing back. Probably some left over anger/resentment from your boyfriend. Great job with your NC period. You should pick up my ebook, Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro so you know all the ins and outs of how to handle all aspects of the post break up stage. Just go to my website Menu/products link and you can learn more. In my book, you will learn that 60 days No Contacts periods are too long. 21 days is the sweet spot for most people. It really depends. I wrote a book called, The No Contact Rule Book that actually goes into a great amount of detail around all of the variables to consider and when you can make exceptions. Keep me in the loop Star! I like your chances from the things you have told me!

    2. Star

      May 7, 2018 at 2:56 pm

      Hi Chris,
      This is an update on my situation. A week ago I bumped into my ex at school (he dropped the classes we took together in order to take them online so we wouldn’t have to see each other, but he happened to be on campus on the last day of our classes). The past month I have been dieting and exercising so I lost a total of 25 lbs. When he saw me he seemed surprised. I kept it cool and friendly. A few days after that he contacted me in the middle of the night saying that “He doesn’t sleep anymore, and he has “some things to say”. He sent me a long text to apologize. In his message he said that, “This isn’t so we get back together because as a couple we were toxic”. Which isn’t entirely true, we were just fighting a lot over dumb things 2-3 months before he ended things. I don’t know though because he keeps sending mixed signals. Does he really mean this or could it be possible that he’s testing out my mood? Or could it even be that he’s confused? Maybe I’m reading into it too much. Anyway I reached out a few days later after finishing 30 days of NC (again keeping it calm and lighthearted) and we have plans to meet up tomorrow for drinks and to catch up. He wanted to meet up earlier than tomorrow, but I played it like I was too busy to meet up sooner. The fact that he agreed to meet up is a surprise to me because he’s the type of person that won’t agree to something if he doesn’t want to do it. We’ll see how things go tomorrow.

    3. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 7, 2018 at 3:22 pm

      Good job Star. Remember, at this stage, its little steps. Avoid talking about the relationship with him. Ask things about his life and compliment him in little ways. Be non-committal about whether you are seeing anyone if that topic comes up. Just have fun and if this progresses, great. If not, then remember, you have so many other wonderful possibilities ahead of you. Oh….one more thing. You should consider joining my Private Facebook Support Group Community. (1500 members). Mostly women in it right now who all have gone through breakup situations, helping and advising each other. I do “live” Facebook webcasts weekly on all sorts of topics. You can find information about it at my website Menu/products section. Let me know how this little rendezvous with your ex turns out!

  14. chocoholic

    April 21, 2018 at 12:23 am

    But the point was I actually need help to be with him.. I need some guidance… And m lucky that I found you sir..I never thought that you will reply to my comment.. I want to be with him though this relationship was getting worse..he was the way too much busy.. friends bla bla, and at the end of the day he knew that i’ll first get angry then I’ll be fine. . I was tired of his this routein and excuses… I know he loves me alot.. but we both were kinda tired..I want him to come back and start a healthy relationship and I know it’s only possible if I give him some space.. I want to teach him a lesson.. idk if m being very aggressive but it’s kinda valid.. we fought badly last time and I don’t want to bend knees in front of him anymore…but the point is it’s a long distance relationship. I met him last time before a couple of months..I miss him alot. . I am trying to be strong.. but I actually need to tell you something is there anyway you can guide me? Anyway? But thanks for your answer I will definitely try my best to take care of myself first… And I know I can be firm till I get any significant result. But sometimes I feel like I am breathless.. we’ve been together since 4 years..and it’s our first relationship (from both sides)..he’s the one whom you can call that stubborn one. .I know he’s waiting for my call or any text… I want him to realize first… I checked your YouTube videos.. I love reading your blogs they’re re very clear… link me any which can help me.. thank you 🙂

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 21, 2018 at 1:24 am

      The best place to get some help on my website would be from my posts, videos, and of course if you click on my website Menu and choose “Products” you will find an array of ebooks and other services that can be of help to you. Having a plan that is based on strategy is important, so take a look at whats out there on my site and you likely will find something you feel would be a good fit

    2. chocoholic

      April 21, 2018 at 5:07 am

      One simple question sir.. it’s been 3 days I am not talking to him.. once he tried to call me after that I didn’t get any of the Tex or call from him.. how long should I wait?? Or Any tip??

    3. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 22, 2018 at 12:08 am

      If you are in NC, you should wait out the entirety of the period. Just like I talk about in the No Contact Rule Book (my ebook), if he leaves you multiple positive messages (communications), then you might want to break it off and proceed as I describe in my ebooks.

  15. chocoholic

    April 20, 2018 at 6:59 pm

    It’s been 2 days since I blocked him. We had a sever fight and then we mutually ended up this relationship.. I applied nc rule since 2 days yesterday at 2 am I got a notification that this user is trying to call you.. though he’s still in my phone’s blacklist.. we both started fighting like hell on some specific matters..I want to start a fresh relationship with him I know he loves me.. I just want to take this relationship to a new level.. how long should I apply this nc rule..?? I miss him badly .. but I’ve set a goal and I want to get it…

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 20, 2018 at 8:59 pm

      Hi again…refer to my previous comments. Ex recovery is not just about getting your ex back, bit it is very importantly about your own healing and finding emotional balance. I know you can do this.

  16. Maggi

    April 15, 2018 at 7:50 am

    Does the NC rule means also not replying to his messages ? We let beginning of 2018 I was desperate at the beginning, we still share the house but he is abroad since then. We had to be in touch because of common things like car, post and so on. Then he came over for two weeks for Work reasons, we were all polite and even had one serious talk that lead nowhere. since he left beginning of March I did not contact first but he does casually texting me and asking how are things or apologises that he left me. I didn’t reply to the last apologies as I think it’s a bit odd to discuss things on Facebook after 10 years of the relationship. Last week it turned out that his mother was sick so I sent a short text if she s fine. It’s been now almost 4 months on and off and I don’t want to be part of this game anymore, so should I just not reply when he text me asking how I am ?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 18, 2018 at 4:31 am

      Hi Maggi….yes Maggie, you are right. NC is also about your recovery and sometimes that means you don’t communicate or even pursue a relationship with an ex. Once your emotions are settled (and they may already be), you will know what you feel for him. If it’s not something you wish to pursue, then don’t. If it hurts inside to replay to him, then just say so in a text to him and then don’t reply anymore and ask him not to text you anymore.

    2. chocoholic

      April 20, 2018 at 7:08 pm

      Sir I need help m in a miserable condition.. suffering from a horrible anxiety.. can you plz contact me on my email..

    3. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 20, 2018 at 8:58 pm

      HI chocoholic…breakups can cause anxiety, but just know you are going to recover fully. If you are seeking personalized help, you can go visit my website Menu/Products page to learn about Coaching services. Having a plan and executing it also helps, so check out some of the ebooks you will see there. And finally, I want you to start a journal and write down you feelings and thoughts so you have an outlet to get your thoughts out. Also increase your physical activity. Both of these things can help you manage your anxiety better, but no its your chemical hormones that are triggering this and in time, it will subside.

  17. Sumati

    February 27, 2018 at 4:05 am

    Hii I’m from India.
    I have a totally different case, my dad is a negative character and my mom just covers his mistakes all the time. Going through all that since my childhood, I decided to move out when I was 23, its been 2 years now. In the meantime I met this guy who literally understands my situation and the pressure that I went through. I loved my mom to the core but unfortunately my dad was her priority. As I spent time with this guy. I started feeling the love I was craving my whole life, seriously he loved my like a mom does. We loved each other to the depths I can’t explain. We both posted our pictures together on social media, told our friends that we’ll be getting married soon. but then his parents didn’t approve me. They said, “this girl left her parents coz her das was a negative character, how can we expect her to give respect to us. She doesn’t know the value of parents.”The sad part is that I recently invited my mom to my place to which she refused saying that u have to invite both of us (mom n dad) else i won’t come either. So it all happened, his parents didn’t approve this, my mother didn’t come back and he stepped off this relationship blaming me for all this. He started saying all that his parents used to say. He even abused me on texts ( i feel he did all that so that i start hating him n try to move on) but i didn’t reply negatively. For some time, I kept begging and pleading to make him stay bt he just went. we are in long distance relationship so i didn’t even get to see him. Then I came across ur article, I started following the NC rule, initially he called me after 3 days (NC worked) asking me if i told my mom that we are not together anymore to which i told him that I dont want to tell anybody, i’ll tell them when i feel like. After he that he never called, and then after a few days (i was still following NC) he blocked me on fb insta etc. I’m still following the NC rule coz the time and moments that we spent were more of a married couple, we planned our whole life together. so i know our love was so pure that he can never ever forget me. I’m still waiting for him, following the NC rule. Please guide me. Regards

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 27, 2018 at 2:47 pm

  18. Emily

    January 5, 2018 at 2:28 am

    I’ve never posted anything like this before but after going through a terrible time I felt I wanted to share.

    Me and my partner had lived together very happily for 5 years, we’d been through so much together and finally achieved our dreams, we relocated for great jobs together and life seemed perfect, all of a sudden he announced he wanted some space and to move 500 miles away back to his mums and leave me and our little boy alone in our new house. I run a company and travel a lot, he is a pilot so also travels a lot, we always made sure we were there for eachother so he knew leaving me like that would destroy my world.

    I gracefully allowed him to go and looked to the internet for strength to try and get through this without totally breaking down. I came across the NC rule. I honestly decided to go through this to focus on me and my life rather than getting him back (he’s particularly stubborn and I felt once he’d made his mind up that would be it)

    Within the first week he cracked, contacting me to say how much he missed me, our lives together etc. I stayed strong. He continued to crack. We’re now nearly 3 months down the line and when I finally felt ready to forgive him for what he’d done, understand his side of things and allow myself to calmly listen to him I’ve allowed him to come back…in another months time once he’s proved himself.

    Without NC I would not have been in a place where I could think about moving forward with him. He would never have realised what he had and I wouldn’t have experienced what life is like alone…it’s not as scary as i first thought.

    If this can work for us then I promise it can work for anyone, whether you get back together or finally realise that life is ok without them.

    Be strong. It’s the best thing I ever did.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 7, 2018 at 1:38 am

      Thank you for sharing Emily!

  19. Trish

    December 1, 2017 at 8:02 pm

    I have a couple questions about the No Contact rule. They are covered in some places but alot of different websites give really different advice.
    One question that I have is in regards to social media. I know a big part of working on yourself is showing off the work that you are doing but what if your ex doesn’t use social media? How can you show the work you’re doing and fun you’re having?
    Thanks!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 5, 2017 at 1:05 am

      Hi Trish,
      that means you need to make your posts public if you’re not friends or not connected.. There’s a high chance he’ll check your account once he gets curious..that’s why it’s important to do posts that just stays there unless you remove them…

  20. Emy

    November 18, 2017 at 6:59 am

    We have been talking since 8months and got engaged 3.5 months back. Its a long distance relationship, no sex, pure feelings. We have never had a fight or disagreement till today instead he always kept talking about the future and always showered me with love and vice versa. Suddenly 5 days back he just broke up with me saying love is not enough and we might not be happy in the future. In one day he just called everything off! Our families were involved we were in love (or so i thought). I kept asking about the reason and he kept giving vague answers and said hes been thinking about it since 15days, but he dint even hint me. His parents are pressurising him away from me i know but i thought he really loved me. What should i do! He has a lot of distractions around him, work, travel, friends. He has’nt even called or messaged since then and i feel was all that time fake?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 20, 2017 at 5:09 am

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