How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back If YOU Broke Up With Him

"I Can't Believe I Actually Have a Chance of Getting Him Back!"

With over 7 million women just like you coming to this site ever year, I’ve seen about every situation you could imagine. Most of the time, I can just ask a few questions about your situation and know in seconds the chances that you have of getting back together with him.

I’ve compressed all of that wisdom into a single calculator ” What Are Your Chances of Getting Your ExBoyfriend Back.

Take 4 Minute QuizAnd Find Out Your Chances!

Typically, there are three outcomes to a break up, you can initiate the break, he can initiate a break or you can both agree that you need to go your separate ways. This page is going to focus solely on the women who initiated the break up. So, the ideal person for this page would be a woman who wants to get her boyfriend back after breaking up with him. Before I get going there are a few things that I feel are really important to mention. First off, while I am going to do my very best to give you a winning strategy for getting your ex back I am not going to be able to cover everything that needs to get covered.

Don’t worry though because I put together the best free page on the internet that will literally break everything down for you step by step and teach you how to get your ex boyfriend back. Oh, and FYI, it is going to take you about 30 minutes to read it completely from start to finish (that is how much effort I put into that thing!)

Common Reasons YOU Broke Up With Him

There are a lot of different reasons that women break up with men (some being their fault.) I feel it is important to understand these reasons because it will let you know if your ex is really worth trying to get back. I want you to understand that I am writing pages for this website not because I want to make money, but because I want to help you and sometimes helping someone is telling them that their ex is not worth going back to. So, here is how this is going to work. I am going to list some of the most common reasons that women break up with their boyfriends and give my thoughts on each of them. Lets take a look at our reasons:

  • You believed that the other fish in the sea were better.
  • You were worried they were cheating on you (but they weren’t.)
  • They actually did cheat on you.
  • As time went on you became less and less attracted to them.
  • There was a huge fight that resulted in a breakup.

You thought you could do better.

At one point of your relationship you thought you could do better. However, after the breakup you realized that you didn’t have it so bad with your ex significant other. This is a theme that is all too common among women so it is nothing to be ashamed of. While certain people might want to make you feel bad for feeling this way I actually applaud you. I think everyone deserves to get the best they can in the relationship department. Now, I will say that if your ex treated you poorly (ex: physical abuse, mental abuse) please do not go back to them. However, if they treated you ok then this is an easier reason to recover from. In fact, some of your ex boyfriends might welcome you back quite quickly but don’t expect things to be smooth sailing right out of the gate.

You were worried they were cheating on you (but they weren’t.)

Look, I can massage your ego as much as possible to soften the blow on this one but you messed up. It never feels good to get blamed for something that isn’t true, especially from someone who is supposed to have your back. Nevertheless, you are going to have to work on your jealousy issues. I am not saying that you are wrong for being jealous. Actually, being jealous is natural and everybody who is in a serious relationship will feel it at some time. However, you are going to have to do a better job on dealing with it in the proper way.

They actually cheated on you.

I am going to be straight with you, a lot of “experts” out there are going to preach forgiveness and I agree with them to a certain extent but I disagree with the ones who don’t acknowledge that chances are, you aren’t going to have a happy ending with the person who cheated on you. So, I am not going to say anymore than this: I don’t like cheating but if you are considering getting back with this person figure out if his cheating was an isolated incident or has happened frequently. Has he cheated on other previous girlfriends? If so, it is a pattern.

You became less and less attracted to them.

Have you ever heard the phrase, familiarity breeds contempt. That is exactly what happened here. You were in a relationship so long with a person that everything they did (what they wore, how they talked, how they yawned) just got on your nerves and made them less attractive to you. So, you broke up with them but soon realized that they were the best boyfriend you ever had and you need them back ASAP. It is going to take some work but you can definitely salvage the situation.

There was a huge fight that resulted in a breakup.

If you have spent any time reading this site you may have noticed that I put together a page about legitimate reasons for wanting your ex boyfriend back. On that page I noted that one of the best reasons for wanting your ex back is if your relationship ended abruptdly or impulsively (as the result of a big fight.) Fights aren’t ever a fun experience. However, you definitely have a shot at getting him back.

Is Your Reasoning For Wanting Your Ex Back Ok?

Now that I have listed some of the most common reasons that caused you to break up with your boyfriend it is time to do some soul searching and figure out if it is ok for you to actually take steps to getting him back. In case you are wondering, I would not recommend that every woman visiting this site go back to their boyfriend. In my view, it is all about your happiness and sometimes going back to your ex, while it could make you happy in the short term, isn’t always the best choice. So, the next big step I want you to take is to take out a piece of paper and write a detailed explanation on why you want your ex back.

Writing this explanation down is important for a number of reasons. First off, it might allow you to take a more objective look at yourself. I know that when I write down an explanation like this, take a break, come back and then read it, I can sometimes have an epiphany like “what was I thinking.” Secondly, it is going to force you to figure out if you wanting your ex back is just an impulse at this moment or a much deeper feeling. Again, I highly recommend that you check out the legit reasons for wanting your ex back article. That page pretty much sums everything up.

The Get Your Ex Back Strategy

A few months ago I had an idea. You see, at that point I was getting a lot of emails from women every single day asking for step by step plans to get their exes back. While I would have been happy to help them out getting your ex boyfriend back is such a complicated subject that there would be no way for me to describe, in detail, how to do it correctly in a short email. So, I came up with an idea.

I was going to create a step by step guide that I could point to any time someone wanted the exact process of getting an ex back. Well, the guide took two months for me to write but I am so happy I did it because it has helped so many women already (seen here.) You can check out the guide below!

Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO (The Step By Step Guide)

What Do You Think? (365)

  1. Danielle - 0


    I think this is a very interesting circumstance and I would love to get your feedback on this at ex bf recovery.

    I met my ex- SO on a dating app and never actually met anyone else before on it but he was so persistence upon meeting me for 3 months I finally agreed to meet him in february, since we matched in december. Everything was going smoothly however we both live in different cities about 40 minutes away from each other so getting together once a week was a challenge- it ended up being around every 10 days or so. We were dating for around 4-5 months and everything was going great. I met his friends they loved me, we went out for nice dinners and drinks, and I even met his father at his childhood home. His mother and little sister were excited to meet me and things were going great, we had tentative plans for him to meet my father. Until one day at work I got an instant message from a girl who I had known to be absolutely insane, from college. She claimed to have been exclusive with my SO and wanted to let me know. At this point of time we were not exclusive so I couldn’t technically be angry with him although I let him know it was horrible to get my nose rubbed into it. After hours of explaining that they weren’t actually dating and she was actually black mailing another roommate of his- I decided to put this in the past and wanted to move forward in the relationship cautiously. Things were slow after that, and I saw him another time and things seemed to be fine after that but in the back of my mind I knew something was up. After that it was about a week and I hadn’t heard from my SO, it turned out one of his best buddies had past away. I saw him that following weekend and we had a wonderful time together and i met more friends of his at a bar. But the next day he never responded to my text message, and I didn’t hear from him in 2 weeks. I told him that I understand that he is going through a hard time and I am trying to be there for him, but I can’t be treated this way, only being reached every two weeks. We ended things on a friendly note and even chatted a little bit afterwards. This was about a week ago. I have never felt this strongly about anyone in my life before, I truly think this man is my soulmate but I have no idea how to win him back- after I broke things off with him. I am leaving for a three months to travel this summer tomorrow but we are still friends on Facebook and instagram. I am going to follow the social media tips- but I am wondering if this is even possible to win him back at this point?
    I think about him everyday and my heart is absolutely broken, but I know that if I didn’t end it then there would be absolutely no hope for a healthy relationship in the future.

    Waiting anxiously for your help!


    • Chris Seiter - 0

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      Hi Danielle,

      if he is grieving..then you did the right thing because he has to go through it

    • Danielle - 0


      Thanks Amor!

      Do you think there a possibility that we can get back together if I follow NCR?
      He reached out to me last monday asking about my health because I had some issues.
      We got into a good conversation and then I ended it. Should I do the NCR for a full 30 days?
      and if so should initiate that I would like to see him again when I’m back from my travels?

      Sorry for all the questions!

    • Chris Seiter - 0

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      we can’t guarantee that ncr will get him back but it will increase your chances..yes, you should do 30 days and reserve asking him to meet up.. do that when you’ve built enough rapport and attraction again

  2. Lizz - 0


    So, i am in a long distance relationship and there have been many ups and downs and mini breaks in which we always end up back together. I was always the one with the doubts, finding reasons to break up and sooner or later i would feel weak and would slide back into the relationship. I have seen him a couple of times since he has been away (over 2 years) prior to him going away we did have plans of settling down, however due to his circumstances he has been left in a state of limbo, and understandably unable to promise anything except his continual feelings towards me. i will admit in the time we have been together (long distance and not- 3-4 years) he has fed my insecurities, this was mainly at the begninng when i found him subtly flirting with/ talking to other girls online however when addressed he did change- i genuinely feel he didnt see itas a big deal- i was also his first serious relationship so i guess a lot of learning was going on. So more recently we broke up as i over reacted to him going out without informing me and pretty much convinced him that we shouldnt be together, that he has wasted my time, has nothing to offer me, makes me feel insecure and that i cant trust him- following this i ignored him for a coupe of days and then sank into old patterns- however i successfully convinced him and he felt that this time i was right- therefore there was a period of distance and he seemd to have lost his fight a bit- within a month things had returned to the status quo (back together, regularly talking etc) shortly i went through a period of distress to which i did not feel i was a priority – i addressed this calmly and explained perhaps we are not suited and we need other people that can bring out the best in us. he was upset and i began no contact – i did tell him before no contact that i needed space to move on- he has always been respectful of my wishes and so did not contact me after this period i contacted him and his responses were polite and neutral- what should i do to get him back ? i have a feeling perhaps he has moved on? i feel if i dont contact him he wont initiate with me and i dont want to come across clingly especially if he has moved on?

    • Chris Seiter - 0

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      Hi Lizz,

      it is actually the hardest situation in getting an ex long did you do no contact and what did you do in it? When will he be back and how often do you see each other?

  3. Tiffany - 0


    So i feel like I have jumped around all stages you have suggested with my ex. We broke up a year ago… and I ended it. I moved on very shortly after with a rebound guy. That I put on social media because I was feeling all honeymoonish and thought it was grand idea. After all my ex and I talked. He seemed to be okay with it and wanting me to move to be happy. So I took that as he didn’t want to be with me anymore. Well we spent 6 months in constant limbo of me trying to get back with him… him not being ready… then when I turned around and decided we are better off as friends.. within a weeks time he would want come running back and being my boyfriend… mind it was only after I initiated the first text. Then finally in January we were both on the same page.. but I found out he had became friends with one of my EX-BESTFRIENDS. I flipped… a lot… basically ending that attempt. A week later I calmed down, and was ready to forgive to move forward. Well since then he hasnt been interested in anything more than “friends.” Yet I don’t believe what he says esp. after reading some of your articles and I know he doesn’t mean that. He is testing my loyalty. He is truly afraid I am going to wake up and change my mind everyday. I can’t blame him I hurt him. He has even said “ive been really good for you, and really bad for you. Either way you have left. I just don’t know what to do anymore.” I understand through this post I need to praise him some more.. and do a lot of that communication you were talking about. But I just can’t get him to see that since January I have been here for him and haven’t changed my mind. At one point in January when I was desperately begging him to take me back I decided I needed to do a little soul searching. So I didn’t talk to him 3 weeks.. my own no contact rule I didn’t know was a thing. But I initiated the conversation…. where he mentioned “well you haven’t talked to me for three weeks.” So I know he noticed and he cares. So I haven’t had a plan when talking to him.. I can’t even tell you how often I have or haven’t reached out… But his mom got recently sick and I was there for me. He called me told me right away… I was at the bedside with her, and offered to be there if he needed anything. Well I freaked out on him again because (remember that ex friend of mine) well she was stopping by to visit his mom to … or mainly him rather. I could not believe it. I believe when he says he doesn’t want anything more than friends with her, but he is using her to get a reaction out of me. It is totally working. So we recently had a conversation about what he wanted from me. All I got was he “can’t see if getting back to the way it was.” Then it became “I just don’t want a relationship with anyone right now.” to “How can I trust you aren’t just going to wake up and change your mind again.” So obviously he is scared and hurting. By implementing the no contact rule right now is not warranted because he also stated in there “I want to hear from you no matter what it is about.”

    So is my next step just start the conversation good times? and how long do you wait before you go into the heart to heart section? I feel like with him anytime before he is ready will totally push him away…. I know he is waiting to go to the state academy for his job… once he comes back from their I know he will be ready.. that is the type of man he is. But his reason for why we can’t try things before the academy is “I won’t be able to talk to anymore for two months… how are you going to handle that?” Mind you I dated him for 18 months while he was in the military… so basically he saying … How can he trust me to still stick around for 2 months without talking to him. But i have soul searched this what I want.. I know what I had now, and I know better how to appreciate… mind you I am a very impatient girl. đŸ˜‰ I am looking for a way to show I am never changing my mind. The thought of us not getting our happy ending together is too much for me to live with.. I simply can’t deal.

    Any advice is greatly appreciated. I will take note in the mean time to you conversation ideas. Also, note we have hung out since January we went out to dinner, and he paid. The vibes were cute like first date smiles, and warm long hugs afterwards. But I couldn’t get him to hangout with me again after that. HE let me in when his mom was sick, but then I flipped about the ex friend showing up. So now I am back to square one. He only came over to see me so I could apologize in person, which is when he stated all the quotes I have listed above.

    • Chris Seiter - 0

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      it’s going to be harder. Actually I think the next best time to reconnect would be after he got from the 2 months in military because right now he still has that image of you being angry.. Try to continue what you’ve been doing again during nc, take a chance on reconnecting with him after a month, but if it’s not good then that means you really have to wait until he’s back.

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