You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed... I'm Here To Fix That

922 thoughts on “You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed… I’m Here To Fix That”

sasha

March 17, 2018 at 2:05 am

Hi,
My guy broke up with me 2 months ago.it was a ldr.since then I have begged him desperately to get back.I’m ashamed of myself for doing so.I cut across this amazing site just a week ago.Chris really makes sense and I curse myself for not having read all this earlier coz I wouldn’t have damaged my chances of reconciliation so badly.I’m currently doing NC.it’s been 7 days.I’m active and I don’t want the breakup to define me.but I also want my guy back.I just wanna know one thing.how can I make him initiate things??I can’t reach out to him after NC coz he has given me the beggar’s tag already..plz help me….i do not know what to do as I cannot afford ur guide…

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 17, 2018 at 4:48 pm

Hi Sasha,

This is not guaranteed to make him initiate but your best chance is to have your own life. Try at least 45 days nc.

sasha

March 17, 2018 at 1:49 am

Hi,
I had a break up with my guy 2 months ago.
Claudia

March 14, 2018 at 3:06 pm

Hi Chris, I’m really hoping to get an answer because my situation was different. We dated for a month and everything was absolutely amazing but he said I can’t see a future with you. I didn’t begged him and had no contact ever since( about 2 weeks) and I really want him back, what should I do ?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 15, 2018 at 3:46 pm

Hi Claudia,

How active are you in improving yourself and in posting?

Carrina

February 28, 2018 at 6:20 pm

I begged & pleaded for my ex he said he doesn’t want me back & I wasn’t good enough but now I’m doing the no contact rule what else should I do plz get back with me.

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 1, 2018 at 11:43 am

Hi Carrina,

Dont beg again and check this one tooThe Ungettable Girl

Syd

February 27, 2018 at 1:46 am

Heya, I just got broken up with almost a week ago after a year and a half of dating. I ended up flipping out about like twice in the ensuing few days, dozens of texts and unanswered phone calls and now I’m blocked. I’m very ashamed and embarrassed, I just hadn’t felt this kind of intense emotional pain after a breakup before. When he broke up with me, he texted me he loved and cared for me but he wasn’t ready for a long-term long distance relationship and wanted NC for a few months if not forever (LDR bc of college since September, have had well over a month’s worth of time together since then) I am just wondering a couple of things…

1) He’s coming over for spring break in a week or two and then the next time he’ll be here in our home town(as far as I know) is for summer break in May. Is it OK to have a NC period longer than a month or so? The way I’m looking at now, the NC period would last the next 2-3 months. Is that a good amount of time given how terribly I reacted post-break up?

2) He doesn’t really have any social media, so I have no clue how I’m supposed to covertly know that I’m doing well. How do I proceed with that?

3) Some of his old chums heard about the break-up from a friend of mine and are mad at him about it and some other things he’s done. I only discovered this today, will it damage my odds too sorely if he thinks I aired all of our dirty laundry out to the world? Is there anything I can really do?

We loved each other dearly and we were very passionate for the vast majority of our relationship, even during the first few months of our LDR we were inseparable. However, he started really changing as an individual and grew very busy, leading us to believe that we were growing apart. It really wasn’t that, the distance had just made everything seemed much worse than it actually was. I told him how I felt one day and he took it really far, breaking up with me the next day without ever having a phone call with me. I know that if we had that conversation when he had returned, things would have been much different.

Sorry that this is so long… I’d really appreciate any help I could get! Thank you!

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 27, 2018 at 2:43 pm

Hi Syd,

do at least 45 days, and continue to be active in social media because he will get curious, and that’s what he will check. Don’t mind other people’s opinions.. Focus in your improvement now and after nc while slowly rebuilding rapport.

Melinda

February 24, 2018 at 5:18 pm

BF and I have been seeing each other for 4-5 months. Everything has been perfect. Talked about future together and how much we love each other. We had instant connection and grew close very fast. We were pretty much inseparable. Last week he broke off the relationship, saying that “maybe one day in the future things will fall into place and we will live happily ever after, but right now just isn’t our time” He tells me this literally one day after we were laying in bed, discussing future, and everything was perfect. I went a little crazy blowing his phone up for about a week, but since yesterday, I’ve laid off a lot and barely reach out to him. Don’t plan on talking to him unless he’s reached out to me first. We had a really good relationship- no fighting, lots in common, similar interests, same outlook in the future, etc. I want him to come back to me. Like, NOW! He’s my world. What do i do?? Please help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 27, 2018 at 11:35 am

Hi Melinda,

don’t be desperate.. be active in improving yourself and do the nc rule for yourself..

Joanne

February 23, 2018 at 12:51 am

He won’t even tallk to me and yes I have begged . Should I just not txt him anymore? He just says he never coming back and we are not together. I’m helpless
M

February 22, 2018 at 5:08 am

My boyfriend broke up with me 9 days ago and I have done 9 days of NC. He hasnt tried to contact me at all and I’m worried he has already moved on. We are together for 3 years and he has broken up with me in the past and came back the following day or a few days later. I feel this time he is serious and doesnt want to be with me. He mentioned if I had of given him space 5 weeks ago that we wouldnt be breaking up. I asked if he had fallen out of love and he said no he hasnt but if I want to think that then okay. Does he just need time and space to realise that he wants to be with me or considering its been 9 days is he never coming back? He did break up with me 3 weeks ago and came running back but hes now done it again about 2 weeks later…..the reason for the break up was “its not working anymore” (he lives an hour away, works 5-6 days a week full-time and does footy every week night).

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 25, 2018 at 10:51 pm

Hi,
I think he got tired but that doesn’t mean chasing is better than doing nc.

Milan

February 18, 2018 at 4:30 pm

I met this guy on Facebook and he is friend of my friend. We became friends too. We talk for day and night and then one day he said he likes me.. And I also liked him. We used to do facetime for 3-4hours daily. Coz we live in different cities and he is far off. But we met once for two days. And it felt so good. He even said he love me and wants to get married to me. But then suddenly he said one week back that I we are not compatible, I never understand things and he can’t handle it. I begged for whole week. May be I pushed him too far to even be friends. Cause now he isn’t even seeing my messages, he is completely ignoring me. Please help me. I want him back. He said we are too different and we can’t get along cause we live far off. But I want him.. I can’t think of doing anything and it’s killing me inside. I can’t think of anything else rather than him 🙁

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 21, 2018 at 11:15 am

Hi Milan,

how long have you been seeing him? Are you going to do nc rule?

Lucy

February 18, 2018 at 2:40 am

Hi,
I was in an LDR for 2 years. We broke up one night and I flipped and called him over and over until he blocked me. It’s weird because THAT SAME DAY he said that he would love me until the day he died and that he cared a lot about me. I tried the 30 day rule but obviously that won’t work because he blocked me. He doesn’t have social media, so I can’t post anything for him to see. The only thing that he had was snapchat, which he unfriended me on (I don’t know if he blocked me on there though.) he was going through some hard stuff at home but I don’t know if that was just a cop-out. Did I ruin my chances by begging?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 19, 2018 at 11:16 am

Hi lucy
Check this one:
Your Ex Boyfriend Blocked You… What Now? (Video)

Dee

February 16, 2018 at 2:04 am

I didn’t exactly beg for my ex back but I did chase him , to the point now he expects it .. I started NC and I’m determined to do it the correct way this time and try to win him back , but if I do NC correct for 45 days and try to build repot and he’s still being a jerk I’ll have no choice but to move on .

My question is what do I do to show him I’m changing ? if he has NO social media , and no close mutral friends ? How would he be able to see my changes

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 19, 2018 at 11:19 am

Hi Dee,

Social media is still your closest chance because when he gets curious, that’s what he will check.

Madison

February 12, 2018 at 5:51 am

My ex broke up with me 4 months ago today and I’m still not over it. We go to the same school and it’s a weird breakup because he didn’t want to but felt he couldn’t handle it, he has a lot of goals and I understand that. But he’s cut me out of his life. His parents follow me on social media and even comment and talk to me sometimes. But when I see him in public he avoids me like the plague. I miss him so much and want him back but part of me knows he’s right and God doesn’t want us together for now. Is there any hope in him coming back? I’ve been making changes and trying to change his perception, I don’t contact him, I don’t even like his posts. What else can I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 15, 2018 at 6:38 pm

Hi Madison,

How old are you both? Have you tried slowly being friendly? Like just greeting him good morning if you bumped into him?

sherr

February 1, 2018 at 8:49 pm

My ex broke up with me a month ago…it hurts..i dont want him back just want to feel better…but i have realized anytime i tell him that i still love him thats when he chats with me..n he would want us to talk as if nothing happens…he said he is embarrased after what he did n does not want to meet up with me cause i will be emotional..but anytime i talk about the break up he mutes….i feel he wants me back but doesnt know how to do it….i dont want him back….just want to move on but its hard…

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 7, 2018 at 11:53 am

Hi Sherr,

If you want to start moving on, stop talking to him. Check this one:
How To Get Over An Ex Boyfriend When You’re Still In Love With Him

Vaishali

January 27, 2018 at 3:49 am

We broke up in October,he just ghosted on me saying I deserve better n this will not work, I tried to stay calm but he initiated contact and wanted to be friends I started to bombard him with messages n calls, as a result he has blocked me all ways as possible n is already talking to his ex. I love him so much I’ve literally begged him asked his friends to advise him n everything but he’s so stubborn. I tried the NC rule for 2 months n he doesn’t even care, please help what can I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 30, 2018 at 11:18 pm

Hi Vaishali,

when you tried it for two months, how much did you improve yourself and how active were you in posting? And the nc rule is for you to be more rational and less emotional and to establish that you’re moving on, if you’re going to beg him again after it, it will offset your efforts during nc.

Julia

January 19, 2018 at 3:26 pm

Hi,
(this is so long omg! please read it though, most of it is just me babbling about him)
My (ex?) boyfriend is the love of my life. I am 16 and he is 18 and this the first long, serious relationship we have both had, so I bet a lot of y’all are shaking your head and thinking, “No, he isn’t the love of your life.” But I know if we try hard enough, we can be really happy: we are both mature (me not so much) and have identical beliefs in a state where everyone has opinions we disagree with, we laugh all the time, we are both very similar in the bedroom (freaky – sorry, TMI, but that’s hard to find in a country small-town). He is special. I have talked with other guys before and never been impressed and I know he is special.
Now that you know I am serious let me say this: Today is 1 week since we broke up and would have been our 1 year. I kind of initiated everything in the relationship except for sex. That sounds wrong, but he’s really just a gentle giant who gets nervous. I hit him up, I approached him, I kissed him first, etc. He did ask me to be his girlfriend, however. We bickered constantly but it was never uncomfortable and he never called them “fights”, more banter. Exact same personalities and all. I got clingy, though. That was my NUMBER ONE PROBLEM!!! I KNOW it now, and I HATE how I acted and I am ALREADY starting to change this. It was so ridiculous. He is a senior and I am a junior and his excuse was that he knew we would have to break up later when he went to college, but I know that my clinginess was a huge part, especially since he is only going to be 45 minutes away. I left him alone this week for the most part except I approached him in school because we have choir together, and we were literally acting like immature toddlers refusing to look each other’s way and I was not having it. We ended up having a long discussion over lunch and even after school. He said it was mature of me to approach him and he was just giving me space because he figured I was mad. (He broke up with me over the phone and I did say when he broke up with me that a small part of me would always resent him for valuing our fantastic relationship with one phone call, but I already apologized for that and he said he understood.) I eventually persuaded him into just giving each other space and not being totally broken up, and he said he wouldn’t mind trying that for a few weeks, gave me a hug, etc. He also said, “You make me so happy and I don’t want this to be so hard.” I can’t tell if he is scared of commitment (we ALWAYS talked about our future but it was not just me that initiated those conversations) or he knows because of my clinginess a LDR wouldn’t work. Two days after we spoke in person I slipped up and contacted him, but it was very brief which is unlike me and although he ended it, I did not respond back and I think he might have been expecting me to. I am trying to do a modified version of NC because there is no way I am going to act like he does not exist during school, it’s ridiculous. Already though I think he might have been expecting me to contact him more. He has looked at every single one of my Snapchat stories (and I post a lot), liked the only photo on Instagram I’ve posted, and although he deleted our pictures on Instagram I think it was because I did it first, he still has pictures of me up on Twitter and they are still his pinned tweet. FYI – it is not another girl. I asked him such and let me tell you, he is a HORRIBLE liar. I know when he is lying, and he’s much too awkward of a person to even manage a hookup. Besides, he called me beautiful up until the day we broke up and we had fantastic sex 3 days before. I am really just asking two things – is there hope for us? And how should I continue this? I am going to do NC outside of school and everything but I am so worried he is going to move on or forget about me if I do that. I also do not think I should do NC for very long. I am honestly heartbroken and I feel as though a part of me has slipped away. My hand feels empty without his in it and my mind is preoccupied of him always. My hobbies (show choir, music, my academics) mean less to me. I know it has been so recent but I can’t imagine healing this before giving a second chance. Please, please please help!

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 20, 2018 at 4:44 am

Hi Julia,

Approach nc like this one:
EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

Kira

January 16, 2018 at 7:28 am

Hi, me and my ex boyfriend were together for a year and a half almost 2 years. 2 weeks ago, 4 days into the new year, I noticed he stopped texting me for 2 days, he’s never done that before and I assumed everything was okay since we had just gotten back together after breaking up for 20 minutes on new years, sometimes he pushes my buttons and goes to far which makes us break up and make up but get back together within an hour.(breaking up and making up isn’t very common with us but it does happen) So anyway, I thought everything was good and After the 2 days or so I snapchatted him because he hadn’t responded to any of my texts and I asked him what was wrong, he finally responded and said he just needed space and that he’s really sorry so my initial reaction was panic because he’s never said he needed space since we live two hours from each other and he drives but I don’t we don’t see each other as much as we used to because he has been working alot but I’m happy and grateful when I do see him. Anyway I let another 3 days pass and still nothing so I resorted to anger and frustration so I broke up with him in a desperate cry for attention, I know it was very childish but it made him talk but he was very different this time, I quickly regretted my decision and I told him I was angry and wanted attention but he didn’t care he said to leave him alone. I resorted to begging and blowing up his phone, things I never thought I’d do and everything wrong mentioned in the article but I wanted him back and still do. I asked if I could see him to say goodbye and he told me he didn’t wanna see me, I sent a sweet apology and goodbye text to him and I’ve been starting the no contact for 2 days now. I’m hoping that he will come back but I’m not sure if he will. We were in love and he was someone I actually saw a future with but I’m not sure if I ruined my chances or not. He did slip up and said he missed me 3 days ago after I told him that I missed him but after that he was really cold and it really hurts. I’ve always been really good to him and I put in more effort with him than I have with any other guy, he’s always told me how I was so good to him and the best girlfriend he’s ever had plus the most affectionate and loving..now I’m not sure if it was even true.
Kimmy

January 15, 2018 at 4:39 pm

So okay. Like every other crazy lady I begged for my ex back when he broke up with me. He told me he wants to try with someone else. Their relationship is easier and doesn’t have the problems we have had. However, while I’m slowly accepting it, I still want him to come back. I’m doing no contact. 45 days to be exact. I’m haven’t posted a profile pic since 2016. So I’m afraid it will look intentional. What on earth do I do? Just wait for him to reach out to me? I deleted his number off my phone to reduce access. Also what are my chances now that he has someone else and the grass may really be greener? Please note that my selling point is our closeness and bond. It was irreplaceable.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 15, 2018 at 5:32 pm

You have to start being active in improving yourself. Do new things, make new friends, start a new routine that you will continue even after nc and start being active in posting..

Kimberly

January 15, 2018 at 4:07 am

So I’m doing the no contact rule. I’ve made every mistake in the book of trying to get my ex back. He does not want me back. That’s what he said, he left me for the girl he cheated with me on. He finds it hard to deal with issues and prefers the easy way out. This new girl is stroking his ego and I suppose he thinks a relationship with her will be more emotionally fulfilling to him. However, he’s my best friend and while my love is fading, I still want him to come back. I’ve deleted his number from my phone but my whatsapp profile pic and about me section is open to the public so that he can see what I’ve been up to. However, should I make it private again for the sake of making myself less accessible? Do I also delete him from Facebook? What should I do with regards to being accessible but not too accessible?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 15, 2018 at 5:30 pm

He has to see your posts..so just let it be public.. Just dont comments back if he likes or comments in your post..

Mary kathryn Carlisle

January 4, 2018 at 6:23 am

Me and my boyfriend were together five years I left him and was honest about why because I was having mixed feelings it crushed him. I wanted him back and did all 7 mistakes on your list. I pushed him to the point where he went from I need space to we won’t be getting back together. I started no contact made it 7 days and then sent an apology. He responded positive but I said nothing back. I have said anything since I don’t know if I’m helping or making it worsr.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 5, 2018 at 10:36 pm

Hi Mary Kathryn,

not really.. just make sure she doesn’t talk to him again..

Sab

January 1, 2018 at 1:52 pm

Hi. My boyfriend and I just broke up last week, Christmas day. Our relationship was fine, we were happy. At the beginning of our relationship, he was so into me. Telling me he loves me and i should trust him. Because i just came out of a toxic relationship. After a while, i opened up myself to him. It was great. But we fight over little things but we managed to work it out. He was depressed, he has problems and i was his emotional support. Even though it’s draining on my part, I still lift him up. He says he can’t live without me, begged me multiple times not to leave him and even cried infront of me and begged. Of course, I always assure him. I always tell him that I wont leave him cause i love him so much. Months later. Early november, we’ve been through nasty fights. We got into a small argument but he hasn’t talked to me for days. He said he needed space. And so i gave it to him. A few days later, he said he was sorry and he loved me very much and he cant afford to lose me. But he said that these past few days, he lost interest in me and he doesnt know the reason why. I was hurt and broke up with him. But a few hours later, he begged me to accept him back. And so i did. We were fine after that but the fights are so often. Until we have reached to the point where we haven’t talked for 2 weeks. The first week of december, I found out he was lying to me. Since october. He doesn’t have anyone but he’s lying about being at home. Instead, he’s out there at the casino gambling. And he knows i hate that. But we worked that out. I gave him a chance again. Chances after chances. Until recently, we got into another fight because he lied to me about where he was. He didn’t talked to me for how many days. And when he finally did, he asked for space. I gave it to him. But 2 days later, he messages me saying he loves me so much and he can’t let me go. He said that no matter how fucked up he is, he really loves me. So we got back together again. We talked and he asked me where i was during our space. I told him about my whereabouts and the guys who tried to hit on me, he was very angry at the guys. And the night when we settled everything, he lied again to me. About where he was and i found it out. I called him and cried and asked why he lied to me again. He kept on saying how sorry he was and that lying was a habit to him because he didn’t want me to get mad. And he broke up with me. He said that I don’t deserve him. He’s just bringing problems to my life. He has no chance on this. At first, I didn’t agree because I know that all of this are struggles. But he begged me to let go of him. I said i would if he told me that he doesn’t love me anymore. He said that he doesn’t and that’s probably the reason why he’s lying to me, because everything faded. And i let him go. I messaged him saying how thankful i am for him and how sorry i am if i ever hurt his feelings. But he just ignored me. After that, he was acting as if he was happy. As if we never happened. He talked to his ex on social media where i can clearly see. One night i drunk texted him saying that i miss him and i want him back. He just ignored it. But he always checks my post on instagram and on snapchat. He’s always my first viewer. And he’s posting a lot lately too. Which is so unlikely for him. He knows how i hate it when he’s drunk and he drives and he posted it. Bug i didn’t contact him or anything. Just last night, i messaged him saying happy new year and im thankful for him and that i miss him, i’ll always love him and i hope he’s happy. He responded saying happy new year too. He also thanked me for everything. He said that he hopes that everything’s just fine and he hopes that i will not get hurt again this year and he hopes that i’ll be happy. He even called me babe. He said “Have a great year babe. Thank you so much for everything” But he didnt said that he loves me or misses me. I didn’t respond after.

After all, I still want him back. I dont know what to do. What should i do? 🙁

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 2, 2018 at 6:50 pm

Hi Sab,

You should start nc because that’s your clean all slate message.

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922 thoughts on “You Desperately Begged For Him Back And Failed… I’m Here To Fix That”