What Are Your Chances of Getting Your ExBoyfriend Back

How Often Do Exes Come Back After A Breakup?

Without a doubt the number one question that I get every single day is,

Chris, do I have a chance to get my ex back?

And usually I have to give a variation of this answer,

“Well, that depends on a lot of different factors”

Of course, if you are trying to get an ex back that is the last thing that you want to hear. Instead, you want a clear cut answer. Heck, some people have literally harassed me until I gave them an exact percentage of their chances.

And usually I am really careful about NOT doing that because I am not a fortune teller…

No, trust me.

I am not!

But a few days ago someone asked me the inevitable question I am always asked,

How often do exes come back after a breakup?

And I got to thinking…

What if there was a way for me to combine my own independent research (I have had thousands of success stories) with the research of others to come up with an actual generalized percentage?

And that is how this article came into existence.

But coming up with a percentage isn’t going to easy since there isn’t a ton of research to go off of out there.

How We Will Calculate Our Success Percentage

I am a big believer in proof.

Nothing annoys me more than someone making a claim without having proof to back it up.

That is especially true when it comes to calculating the percentage of exes who come back after a breakup.

So, I wanted to find a way to legitimize this calculation so I can give you as accurate a number as possible and I think I came up with a pretty awesome way to do it by looking at two data points.

  1. We are going to look at specific studies that came up with a percentage on exes who come back after a breakup
  2. We are also going to ask professional experts (relationship coaches, psychologists, therapists, etc) what percentage they are experiencing

Now, we are doing it this way to limit the outliers.

Something tells me that your chances of getting an ex back aren’t going to be 80% but if someone professional says that they are and it’s the only data point in the calculation then your chances are going to be significantly inflated.

I think that is a really short sighted way of looking at this.

Instead, we need to be looking at data points from all around and averaging them together so we can come up with an accurate number that seems realistic and that is what we are doing by going this route.

Ok, enough chit chat.

Let’s get right to it.

Part One: What Scientific Studies Had To Say About Exes Coming Back After A Breakup

In this section we are going to be focusing on research studies that I happened to stumble across that gave a percentage calculation on exes coming back after a breakup.

In total I stumbled across 4 studies that I am trusting enough to cite.

Each study came up with an actual percentage.

So, here is how I am going to approach this.

I am going to cite each study, briefly give you my thoughts on it and then average the studies together to come up with one number.

Once I do that I am going to jump into the other section (experts) and repeat the same process.

Sound good?

Let’s begin!

Study #1: Poll Conducted By The Associated Press

If you are a pretty avid reader of Ex Boyfriend Recovery then this study might sound familiar to you because I quote it often.

In late 2015, The Associated Press conducted a poll where they asked 1,240 individuals all kinds of interesting questions about exes. Of course, one of those questions was,

Have you ever gotten back together with an ex after a breakup?

It turns out that 41% of the people being polled had said that they had.

(Source)

Now, I will say that this poll is a little flawed in the fact that the wording of the question doesn’t hit on the exact thing that you are wanting if you are reading this article.

You see, “The Associated Press” asked them if they have ever gotten back with an ex before.

In other words, in your lifetime have you ever gotten back with your ex.

It never specified specifics which is kind of what you want.

Nevertheless, this is a legitimate poll and it’s a great start to our little study here.

Study #1 Percentage: 41%

Study #2: Conducted By Dr. René Dailey of the University of Texas

In 2009 René Dailey thought it would be interesting to take a look at dating in college and she found that around 65% of college students who had broken up with their partners had eventually gotten back together again.

(source)

Now, I want to point out the huge discrepancy in percentages between study #1 and study #2. Why do you think that is?

Well, if I had to guess it’s because Dr Dailey only queried college students in her study whereas study #1 was much more generalized querying people of all ages.

I suppose the big take away from the discrepancy is that college aged students tend to go back to their exes at a higher rate than normal.

But we have only looked at two studies so I can’t say we have found “normal” yet.

Study #2 Percentage: 65%

Study #3: Study In (Relationship Churning in Emerging Adulthood: On/Off Relationships and Sex With an Ex)

In 2012 A study conducted by S. Halpern-Meekin, W. D. Manning, P. C. Giordano and M. A. Longmore found that around 44% of men and women aged 17 – 24 were reported to have broken up and then gotten back together again.

(Source)

So, what can we learn from this study?

Well, the discrepancy between it and study #2 are apparent but I’d like to point out that this study focuses on a few extra ages that study #2 did not.

So far it appears that study #2 is an outlier as the other two studies have had significantly lower percentages.

However, I think there is something to that college ages thing that study #2 hones in on but lets take a look at our last study before we make an assumptions.

Study #3 Percentage: 44%

Study #4: Study Conducted Amber Vennum From Kansas State University

Now, before I dive into this one I want to say that this is probably the least accurate study of the four.

Why?

Well, because it only focuses on a subset of couples who have broken up.

According to a 2013 study conducted by Amber Vennum, an assistant professor of family studies and human services at Kansas State University, about 37% of couples living together who had broken up had reported that they had gotten back together again.

(source)

I wish I could have found more accurate data for you guys for the fourth study.

I looked everywhere and read some of the most boring studies you can imagine but this was the best I could find so we are just going to have to make due!

Study #4 Percentage: 37%

Adding The Studies All Up

So, we looked at a total of four studies in part one.

Their percentages respectively came in at,

  1. 41%
  2. 65%
  3. 44%
  4. 37%

So, overall when you average those four percentages together you get,

46 Percent

Which honestly I think is a pretty solid number considering one of these studies only focused on couples who were living together which always presents it’s own set of unique problems.

Overall, when you look at these studies it seems like you have the best chance if you and your ex are in the college ages,

College Ages = 18-22

Study #2 found a significantly higher success rate when it only focused on couples within that age range.

So, it seems like that is the sweet spot to be.

But we are only looking at half the data here.

Lets move on and ask some experts!

Part Two: What Experts Had To Say About Exes Coming Back After A Breakup

I knew I wanted to get some actual experts take on percentages instead of just relying on studies.

After all, there is something impersonal about studies and sometimes you can learn a bit more by hearing from experts out there.

Overall I was able to bring together four experts to the table for you,

  1. A professional relationship consultant
  2. A sex therapist
  3. A psychic
  4. Marriage and family therapist

Now, one thing I learned very quickly is that experts are a lot like me in the fact that they look at things situation by situation. Sometimes it’s impossible to give an exact percentage when you look at things like that.

So, as I give you the expert take you will notice that I am going to be not counting some of their answers.

Why?

Well, some of them didn’t give percentages.

Overall though I think 3 out of the 4 gave us a percentage to work with!

Lets begin!

Expert Take #1: Chris Seiter (Professional Relationship Consultant)

Hey, that’s me!

Getting people back together is kind of my thing since it’s what I do for a living but putting an actual success percentage behind it is really difficult.

Why?

Well, sometimes people don’t tell me when they get their exes back.

Most people know me through my writing here on Ex Boyfriend Recovery and they never get a chance to introduce themselves to me because they never leave comments.

So, knowing my exact success percentage is difficult to nail down.

What I can focus in on though are the people who I have worked with personally.

Off the top of my head I would say that 45% of those individuals have seen success in some way, shape or form.

However, I will say that, that number significantly increases for those people I work with that actually execute what I tell them to do.

I find that the majority of people who I work with don’t actually implement the things I tell them to and then I often get blamed when things don’t go how they were hoping.

Nevertheless, my number is probably somewhere around 45%.

Expert #1 Percentage: 45%

Expert #2: Sunny Rodgers (Certified Clinical Sexologist)

Sunny runs a pretty popular website and is a Certified Clinical Sexologist, a professional sex coach and an Ambassador for the American Sexual Health Association

I have to say that I found Sunny’s findings really fascinating.

Here is what she had to say,

“With a lot of my clients I find that Exes play a big part in their current lives, whether their in a new relationship or not. I’ve had clients seek tarot card readers and have worn Moonstone because they heard that that stone will help reunite lost loves. With my clients, I find that 20-25% do get back together with their Exes, usually within a few months. Some repeatedly break up just to keep passion and tension alive in their relationship. And for the 20-25% that do get back together, 50% of them will break up again permanently within six months. All of this is just what I’ve seen with the people that I’ve coached.”

The 20-25% success rate doesn’t shock me. What really interested me was her finding that half of them will stay together and half of them will breakup within six months.

Fascinating stuff!

Expert #2 Percentage: 25%

Expert #3: Davida Rappaport (Psychic, Entertainer, Speaker, Tarot Card Reader)

I figure you always need to have a psychic in the mix when you are doing these kinds of calculations so I asked Davida about her findings and she wrote a lot of really fascinating things for me,

“Many of my clients ask me if their Ex is coming back or what they should do if their Ex wants to come back. In some cases, they still love them and would welcome them back in a heartbeat, even if the relationship may have been abusive. Predicting if and when an Ex may return is somewhat unpredictable. Everything depends upon what their relationship was like prior to the breakup and what triggered the breakup. Here are a few possibilities you may want to consider:

1. If the relationship was very steamy – major chemistry and hot, hot, hot, there is a strong chance the Ex will want to come back; he will probably re-establish contact within a few weeks or a few months. When the chemistry is off the chart, even if there are problems in the relationship that were never dealt with, chemistry generally overrides logic. This type of comeback goes both ways. However, if the couple does not work on the relationship, they may break up and reunite more than once. If fact, they can keep doing this for years.

2. If the relationship was volatile (and ended the same way), I generally tell my clients it would not be a good idea to let their Exes back into their lives because their relationship was unhealthy and/or abusive. Because of the volatility of the personality, it is impossible to predict when their Ex will return. These types of Exes can come back within a month or as far out as a year later, if they are going to come back. I remind my clients they should not expect him to change his behavior – this will still be a volatile relationship. If they take him back, they may end up separating again because the relationship problems are still there.

3. If the relationship was a good one, and your breakup was due to your Ex relocating for a new job or accepting a transfer, why not call him to see how he is doing if he does not contact you after six months? You can always find out if he misses you. The best thing that could happen is he tells you he still loves you and misses you. Who knows, you might end up reconnecting and relocating to be with your former Ex.

4. If you broke up because your Ex suggested you both see other people, that is usually a sign that your Ex wanted out of the relationship. In this case, the chance of him wanting to come back is slim to none. You may never know the real reason why he wanted to break up, and I don’t recommend driving yourself crazy trying to figure it out. It usually has nothing to do with you. If at some point down the road he realizes how wonderful you are wants you to take him back, wouldn’t it be fantastic if you found someone better in the meantime? You could tell your Ex, “You blew it.”

5. If your breakup was because of family obligations (older parents or young children), this type of breakup usually does not lend itself to comebacks. Some Exes have a problem with familial obligations because they want things simple, easy and no drama. In this case, he probably won’t want to come back. That can be a good thing.

6. If your breakup was due to your Ex’s familial interference, more than likely, your Ex will not be making a comeback. Generally if you have an Ex whose parents always pull his strings, even if he wanted to come back, he will always choose his family over you.

7. I saved the most outrageous scenario for last. If your Ex is commitment phobic and broke up with you when you brought up the “C” word, there is a good chance he may turn up again under a future Retrograde Mercury. However, he may also leave again if he doesn’t want to commit. If you want to dismiss the Retrograde Mercury option, remember that a commitment phobic Ex may come back again at any time, and often does. However, if you mention the “C” word again, he will either break up again or become a ghost. Like a ghost, he may haunt you in some way…if you let him.”

See, aren’t her findings really fascinating?

The sense I got from them was that your chances are very situational.

So, with her I don’t think we can come up with an actual percentage but that is ok.

She just cut right to the heart of the matter which I am going to talk about in a second.

Expert #3 Percentage: N/A

Expert Take #4: Lisa Bahar (Marriage And Family Therapist)

And last but certainly not least we have Lisa Bahar a Marriage and Family Therapist!

Here is what she had to say about exes returning,

“Ex’s tend to return more often than not, it is the second question as to why, in many cases, there may be a sense of guilt, attachment, that they need to confirm that the ex is still receptive to them, wanting to seek control even though they are no longer committed, wanting to have attention. 

In other cases perhaps, the individual had time to reflect, explore his or her feelings about the breakup after a period of time and feels inclined to try and reach out and return.  Many times, there is rejection that the ex was not expecting, and returns to one who they feel will be more open and receptive.”

Exes tend to return more often than not…

How do we quantify those words into a percentage?

I wouldn’t ever try to speak for Lisa but it is my understanding that more often than not means more than 50%. So, using that logic 51% would be more often than not and I would like to use that as Lisa’s number.

Why?

Well, I wanted to mimic our research findings with the studies above as closely as possible and 51% is the closest number we can use.

Expert #4 Percentage: 51%

What Percentage Chance Of Getting Your Ex Back That You Actually Have

And now we come to the grand finale.

This is the moment we have all been waiting for as I add everything up and give you one specific number as to what your chances with your ex are.

First things first, I’d like to remind you what the studies number was in case you had forgotten.

  • Studies Found That 46% Of Exes Will Come Back After A Breakup

Ok, now before I give you the final number let’s add up all of the experts opinions.

In total we have four experts who gave us opinions on what percentage of exes came back,

  1. 45%
  2. 25%
  3. N/A
  4. 51%

I am just going to void the N/A and not count it in the average.

So, when I tally it all up we get,

  • Experts Say 40% Of Exes Come Back After a Breakup

So, experts are definitely a bit lower than studies but that doesn’t really matter since we still need to average everything together.

Are you ready?

Drumroll please!

….

…..

…..

…..

……

According to my research there is a 43% Chance That Your Ex Will Come Back After A Breakup

But I personally think that you can move that number up if you know what you are doing.

How many of the men and women in these calculations actually knew what they were doing?

The answer = not many of them.

Just saying!

Written by EBR Teamate

Chris Seiter

33 responses to “How Often Do Exes Come Back After A Breakup?”

  1. Jasmine says:

    I just wanted to say that reading all the posts on this website and buying the No Contact rule handbook really really helped me. Listening to the podcasts helped me too. In all honesty the no contact rule is so critical and important to getting your ex back.
    My ex and I broke up back in December 2015 and it was super hard on me. I made so many mistakes…constant texts, seeing him and sleeping with him after we had broken up, not giving him his space…to the point where he actually blocked me 2 or 3 times.
    It wasn’t until I implemented the no contact rule and didn’t talk to him for a while that things started to turn around. I used a prolonged tidal wave method where I would talk to him a little and then disappear for a while. And everytime I recontacted him, he was a lot more open to talking. I think once I started dating other people a lot of his defenses came down.
    Well anyway, he dated someone else about 6-7 months after we broke up, and that relationship failed. About a month after that we spoke and he was actually very receptive to the idea of us dating again. Over all, the process took about a year and a half, so don’t expect it to always happen overnight. By then of course, I was already very much over him and not interested. But the point is, the opportunity to get him back did eventually come.
    My advice to anyone trying to get an ex back is to try to end things on a positive note and be nice to them. Give them plenty of space and implement no contact when necessary. They will eventually come around. And don’t be afraid to contact them after some time has gone by! Because sometimes they want you but they won’t say anything. The advice given on this website about playing it cool is some really great advice that I even use outside of dating. Thanks so much for helping me!

  2. Kandace says:

    My boyfriend broke up with me yesterday for religious views. Our relationship was honestly great for the most part. We had a couple little fights here and there. But for the most part it was good.

    I’ve learned in the past to not show any emotion to when they break up with you. So I told him, “No worries, I understand! I agree” we hung out last night when he “told me he has to break up for a week until he sees his bishop again.” He texted me about 5 minutes after I left his house. I said,” I’m not sure if I’m allowed to say I had fun? But probably not lol so I guess I’ll say goodnight! ”

    He says he still wants to hang out and see me, but I have a feeling I need to do no contact. Do I just suddenly stop texting him, but he’ll get angry.

    He broke up with me last night and I’m here to play my cards right. I need help!

  3. cas says:

    so im kinda in the situation. my ex and i broke 8 months ago after a relationship of 2 years and recently there’s this guy ive been talking too for about a month and it’s been g r e a t. but the only thing is i still have feelings for my ex (very minor but still there) but i also starting to develop feelings for the other guy????? if that make sense at all lol. my ex has apparently found out about that guy and trying to get me back but within those 8 month period that we have broken up he never done anything like this?? i want to move on but there’s i feel like there’s something that’s holding me back because he wants to get back together but i also have feelings for the other guy so i don’t know what to do

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      honestly, it looks like he’s trying to get back because he can see you’re moving.. the question is, would he be consistent once he gets you back again?

  4. Nicole says:

    Hi,
    Me and my ex broke up more than 6 months ago. We are both only 18 so were fairly young. We had a great relationship and loved each other. I ended up having to move away for awhile and he broke up with me out of the blue because he said he couldn’t handle the distance and I was crushed. Fast forward many months to now and Ive recently moved back home into the area. Ive been offered a part time job at the same place my ex works. I know I probably shouldn’t have applied there in the first place but I did and now its the only place Ive been able to get an interview at. I want to take it just because I think it would be good for me personally and also Id be lying if I didn’t admit the thought of working with him sounds good to me because I really do want to reconnect with him. What Im worried about is that I fear that when my ex finds out I applied and got a job where he works he’ll think I’m being a creep or following him or something which is not what I want at all. I haven’t had any contact with him and haven’t even seen him in five months but I did come back to visit for a few weeks 5 months ago and during that time I did become a little obsessive with trying to run into him (but like I said that was months ago). Its not working together that worries me because Im sure wed still get along great. We ended things on pretty good terms and I don’t think he had any negative feelings towards me. I really want to reconnect with him though. Ive been trying to be very active on social media and everything and I was hoping he’d eventually reach out. Then this job opportunity came up and i don’t know what to do. Should I pass on it and just continue what Ive been doing and hope he reaches out or take the job and risk him thinking I’m being a stalker or something?? I feel a lot of pressure because I feel like this decision could have a big impact on everything. Do I take the job or look for one somewhere else? Which would be the best chance of him wanting to get back together or reconnect with me?

  5. Pals says:

    My boyfriend and I broke up two months ago. He broke up with me coz he cudnt deal with the long distance and study pressure and said he wasn’t ready for a relationship. He was very serious about the relationship but suddenly fizzled out. When he was in town everything was great, he gave a lot of attention and met me every day but the week he went back he changed his behaviour. Started becoming very distant. We spoke on and off after that and also had a few arguments. He’s gotten attached to another girl and I don’t know if I even stand a chance with him now. I really do feel about him and wish to get him back. I tried explaining to him in every way possible that this relationship would be different but he seems to be disinterested. I don’t know if he’s fallen for another girl coz we haven’t spoken since a week. The last time we spoke he said we should only be friends but he doesn’t seem to be maintaining the friendship. He doesn’t text me till I do so and I don’t want that. He thinks by talking to me I will get deeper into the friendship and il expect something later. He has asked me to move on saying it’s the best for us both for now but I can’t seem to accept that. I don’t know how to bring him back to me and make him see how happy he was with me. He seems to be very confused about whatever he’s doing. Please help me figure this situation out.

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      do you want to try the no contact rule?

    • Pals says:

      Will the no contact rule have an effect on him?! Or is there any other way this can be worked out ?

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      the no contact rule helps to increase your chances because he already made a decision, which is to break up with you.. continue to talk after that will either make you friendzone or you will look like chasing which both decreases your value because you look you don’t respect yourself enough to walk away when somebody chose to leave you.. when you do no contact, focus in healing and improving before slowly building up rapport again while you continue to improve yourself

    • Pals says:

      So I have initiated the no contact rule. It’s been almost one and a half weeks since we spoke. I don’t know if it’s even having any effect on him. I just don’t want everything to end for good, or him to move on completely. Maybe it’s his ego that’s making him not talk to me. I really am confused as to what to do.

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      check this one:
      The Ungettable Girl

  6. Henley says:

    Hi Amor!
    My exboyfriend and I broke up last year after two years together. We were in a long distance relationship and after he cheated we hit a low, he moved for me to my country for a semester but we fought a lot and eventually decided it didn’t work this way. We took a lot of space and since the new year we have been in such good contact again. Still, because of the coming goodbye, it never got official again and he said he loved me but wasn’t in love with me, so I just left it at that without any expectations and we said our goodbyes. Since he’s back home he’s showing so much initative and now even wants to go on a trip together soon because he misses me. Obviously I miss him too, but he is the one that said he wasn’t in love with me when I was, so should I talk to him about this or just wait and see what happens? We are taking it slow and I can sense he is comfortable in this no strings attached sort of thing we’ve got going on now. It is so confusing. I like him giving me attention and all and I understand – but I don’t want to get my hopes up for us getting back together.

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      try to wait and see first..so, that you wouldn’t look like you’re thinking about it..

  7. TNT says:

    Probably explained that wrong:
    I begged twice in the first month and now haven’t contacted him in 2,5 months!

    Is there even a change a boyfriend would come back to you it he (thinks) he’s completly over you and he (thinks) he’s falling outta love? Ever had any cases like this?

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      Take it as a restart.. well, it depends on how much you improved, and if you were active in posting, it also helps because he can see your improvements.. How much you can build rapport while continuing to improve yourself also..

  8. irene says:

    Hi Chris
    I have to say a big thank you to you and your entire team for providing such psychological helps. Thanks to you all i got my ex back. I didn’t tried anything. I just went into a complete no contact even though the nc was too late. It took 10 months of nc to get him back. He dumped me 2 times before but now He admitted sorry For real.
    I still love him like before and i have also said yes but I’m afraid what if he breaks up again for no reason? I don’t want to be in the same position.

  9. Despacito says:

    Hi ! My ex broke up with me 5 months ago..he said he doesnt feel the same and that o deserve better(we lived together).
    He really is going through a time in his life where he is just thinking about what he wants to do for a living and about his own problems(he might go to a jail).For 5 months i was still there for him..after the start when i beged and cried i was now normal..i never called him or texted him..it was always him asking me to get coffe and sending text where he called me by my pet name(just like he used to call me when we were tohether).Yesterday after 5 months he finaly returned me the rest of my stuff(he was always bringing them one by one) and i told him that what are we doing..what is the point of seeing each other being friends if we arent working on getting back together..he said i was right and we shouldnt see or call eachother..i asked him if he could turn back time would he started dating me and he said absolutly and that he wouldnt do the mistakes he did..but that he has a life to figure out..is it too late for me to start the no contact rule or should i just accepte it and move on..(when i think about not knowing what is going in his life and if he is ok i just start cring..i care about him alot and just wish he was happy)..Thank you for response it means alot..

  10. Lynn says:

    I have written in another post last week. My ex boyfriend broke up with me four months ago. After a while talking sometimes, I decided to go NC because he was very distant and that was hurting me. After those weeks we start talking again like friends, from time to time and about books, movies, tv… Sometimes he sent me things saying “it made me think about you”. We usually to have short conversations, once a week or so. I miss the times we texted each other all day long). He is very stubborn and said that he is not in the “us” page anymore and the fact that we live in different cities (but near) isn’t helping (he hated distance due to a past experience). If we could met in person… He said that he wouldn’t mind met and go to the movies or something like that but as we barely talk, it is not possible arrange a meeting, I would be forcing things and wouldn’t work. I really want to make him “addicted” to talking to me like before, I need to gain him back but I don’t know how. You suggested me to play “the ungettable girl” and I am trying (at the same time, I show him my positive side in the group chat we shared) but I really miss him and I think that the key would be metting in person. With distance is easy to say “I’m over it” but if he could see me, spend a few hours woth me… I don’t want to talk about us inmediately, I just want make him remember who we were together. The problem is that I am afraid he would say no to a meeting. Well, I asked him in february two times, even when he was being very very distant to me (telling him that I was going to his city for something else and we could met) but he gave me excuses (even though, I said thanks for telling him and asked me to tell him if I go there). After that I started NC because his coldness during those weeks was hurting me. After that, as I told above and the other day, he used to text me once or twice a week but with things about our favorite tv shows and movies (I use the past because I am always afraid that he don’t text me anymore) and I guess he is a little more comfortable but it is not enough and I still don’t have the confidence to ask him to met in person. What can I do to make him more attached to me again and create the situation for asking him to met without forcing the things? (well it would be better if was him who suggested it but it seems impossible to me). I really believe that meeting in person and experience me again, just like before (not our last dates, obviously) could move him a little.
    I must say that I’ve just finished in my temporary job and I am searching for one in his city (it is the most important city of our region, above all in my field) so…well, if I got it, the distance which limited him would be over but I don’t have any yet, so for now I have to “work” with what I have, and the situation is what it is…

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      that’s good that your positive on texts.. you have to be active in posting in your account too..because you have to show that you have a life.. and that you’re just being friendly because he can see that you’re moving on through your posts.. he wouldn’t want to meet if he thinks you’re trying to work your way back together

    • Lynn says:

      Thanks Amor, thanks a lot. Luckily I’be always had a real good social life which didn’t stop after the break-up and he knows it.
      I`ve been thinking about telling him something, asking for his advice (there are things in my life that only he and one of two of my closest friends know about and he knows that), just for re-building the trust: since I can force him to telling me things like before, I could give that step, just once (because my goal is he perceiving me as a happy and positive person, the side I am trying to show him now). Could this, asking him for a little advice, work to bring him a liiitle bit closer to me?

      Thank you a lot again

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      yup, that’s a good move.. it’s ok to ask for help from him.

    • Lynn says:

      Thank you a lot again Amor. I think that today I’m gooing to send him a message telling him that this weekend I’m gooing to watch our favorite tv show (he told me two weeks ago that if I did it, I could tell him and we could watch one “together, by distance, texting. It is something we used to do when we where dating) and that if he wants we could do what he suggested. Light and fun. I don’t think that he will do it but if yes, well, is something, he would spend at least 30 minutes “with me” and remember old times. If not, he will see that there is no drama, I’m cool and I’m not insisting. Aaaand next week I’ll try what I said in the last post, telling him a problem and asking for his advice. I hope it works…

      Thank you again, this support is important to me

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      You’re welcome..I hope it works too!

  11. TNT says:

    Boyfriend told me he is 100% over me and 100% outta love. He told me this Friday. We’ve been broken up 3 months, I’ve been in NC for 3 months, begged twice in thise 3 months. (I really needed 3 months to heal, we’ve been dating for 5 years.) The break-up was friendly.

    Is there even a change a boyfriend would come back to you it he (thinks) he’s completly over you and he (thinks) he’s falling outta love? Ever had any cases like this?

    • EBR Team Member: Amor says:

      that’s not a no contact period if you talked to him..especially if you begged

  12. Astrid says:

    What if you betrayed their trust by telling something they told you in confidence and they found out and never want to see you again?

    Based on these numbers my situation sounds hopeless.

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