What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Moves On To A New Girl (Video)

It’s been too long since I have done a video.

I apologize for that.

We actually had to find a new place to set up our video equipment since my daughter has to have her own room now and we were using her room as EBR YouTube central!

Talk about ghetto, right?

Anyways, we found a place and now we are back up and running.

Our latest video is about what you can do if your ex boyfriend has moved on to a new girlfriend.

(Shutter)

Check it out,

Transcript

Chris: Hey, Chris Seiter here from Ex Boyfriend Recovery and today I’m going to teach you about how you can get your ex boyfriend back if he’s moved to another girl.

So, the other day, I got to thinking, what are some of the people who are getting their exes back and doing that the people who aren’t getting their exes back, not doing? So, I went through my website and I took apart all the success stories I’ve had over the years and I’ve learned something shocking.

One of the most popular type of success stories are people who have gotten their exes back after their exes have moved onto someone else. So, what I like to do with this video is talk to you about my strategies for helping you to get your ex boyfriend back assuming he’s moved on to another girl.

Alright, this video is going to be divided into three parts.  The first part is rebound relationships. The second part is the grass is greener syndrome. And finally the third and most important part is the being there strategy. Let’s tag in right now to rebound relationships.

PART ONE: Rebound Relationships

Common sense tells us that when you’re ex boyfriend moves on to someone else, your chances are aren’t that great but there’s one exception and that’s if he’s moved on to a rebound relationship. So, what I like to do now is give you my description of what a rebound relationship is so, you can figure out if he’s in that category assuming he’s moved on.

There’s three telltale signs of a rebound relationship. The first sign is if he moved on really fast. So, he broke up with and then he moves on in a week or something to a new girl or that can be a sign that he’s going into a rebound relationship.

The second sign is if that rebound relationship doesn’t last very long. So, in other words, if your ex boyfriend is dating someone and he’s been dating her for like a year, that’s probably not rebound relationship and finally the third sign is if he’s serious about it. You can always tell when a man is serious about a relationship. Depending on how he acts around his friends or how he interacts with her on Facebook or social media. So, look at signs like that.

Next, we’re going to talk about The Grass is Greener Syndrome and how it relates to your situation.

PART TWO: The Grass is Greener Syndrome

Alright, so The Grass is Greener syndrome is kind of an interesting thing. I always like to think that when it comes to men they have, there’s a visible attraction scale on their head and this attraction scale is a living, breathing thing. Into everything that goes into the attraction scale is sort of relating to a woman, her looks, her personality, her characteristics, basically anything that would make a man find you attractive goes into this scale and it’s a 1 through 10 scale. So, for example, a woman that man is supremely attracted to would be a 10 on a scale and a woman that he’s not attracted to obviously, would be a 1.

So, what happens with this scale is, when an ex boyfriend first dates you he goes through something called the honeymoon period. That’s where you can do no wrong, everything’s perfect in the world. So, in his internal attraction scale to you, you’re a 9 or a 10. You’re almost perfect but as the relationship goes on, little things about your personality or your characteristics or maybe your looks change and his attraction scale gets lower and lower and lower and it eventually gets to a point where it’s so low where he starts thinking, “Maybe, I can do better than her.” So, that’s when a break up occurs and he starts looking for someone.

So, he’s broken up with you and he starts to look for another girl that he thinks is going to be better than you and let’s say he finds her. He finds a girl and he goes through the same process that he went through with you, the honeymoon period where she can do no wrong and she’s perfect to him but when you look at her set attraction scale, she doesn’t have anything on you. She’s boring to him. Her characteristics aren’t going to be as good as you and when the honeymoon period wears off for him, he’s going to compare her scale to yours and yours is better. So, he’s going to sit there and think to himself, “Man, I made a mistake breaking up with her.” That’s kind of  the grass is greener syndrome. It’s where a man breaks up with you because he thinks he can do better and sometimes he can. Sometimes, the grass is greener on the other side but often times it’s not. Often times the girl can’t hold a candle to you and you need to keep this mind when you’re trying to get your ex back. So, why would I tell you this whole thing about the grass is greener syndrome? It’s to give you hope. It’s to let you know that you really do have a chance to get your ex back which leads me to my next point.
I’m going to give you the ultimate strategy for helping you move things along when it comes to your ex moving onto another girl.

I like to call it The Being There strategy.

PART THREE: The Being There Strategy

Alright so, The Being There Strategy, you know, if there’s one thing that’s probably the toughest part about getting an ex boyfriend back when he’s moved on to another girl it’s the fact that you have—you run the risk of pinning yourself as the common enemy. And if there’s one thing that unites two people more than anything, it’s a common enemy. If you play this the wrong way, your ex and his new girlfriend are going to get united over the fact that you’re trying to break them up. So, we need to kind of tread this fine line. We’re not trying to break them up but we just put your ex in a position where his ex girlfriend is really not so fond of you being in the picture and that’s where the being there strategy comes into play.

Alright, so I’m not a fan of trying to break people up. That’s not what we’re about here in ex boyfriend recovery but often times all that you have to do to put a rift between your ex and his new girlfriend is just by being there. Just by being in the picture, just be being consistent with talking to your ex. You don’t even need to hit on him. You don’t even need to use this any kind of like super text judo or get him to hit on you, you don’t need to do that. All you got to do is just be there and his new girlfriend will take note of you, the ex girlfriend being in the picture. So, just by being there, you’re going to make his new girlfriend jealous of you, his ex girlfriend. And often times, when jealousy comes into play, many kind of find it attractive at first but if you are consistent with the fact that you’re being there in the picture is going to find her jealousy and her insecurity unattractive and that’s what you need to do to kind of show him that she’s not all that great. You’re the one that’s great.

I want to take a moment to thank you for getting to the end of this video. I really appreciate you watching it and I want to offer you an opportunity. An opportunity to become a part of the ex boyfriend recovery family. We have a whole team of people dedicated to helping you get your ex boyfriend back and all you have to do is show your support and we’re more than willing to help you out. You can show your support by simply liking this video, subscribing to our channel, visiting our website at www.exboyfriendrecovery.com. You can find the link in description below or just commenting in this Youtube video. Just do something to get involved in this community and we’re more than willing to help you out. We’re very responsive. We’ll see you later.

	https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/chris-avatar.jpg	

Written by EBR Teamate

Chris Seiter

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620 Comments on "What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Moves On To A New Girl (Video)"

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260806345
Guest
My ex-boyfriend and I were together for 3 and a half years. He broke up with me. Now he is talking with a new girl. I don’t think it is anything serious, probably just a rebound. It has been a little over a month that we’ve been broken up. At the beginning of our breakup, I didn’t take it well, and he knows that. He has still has some of my things but avoids giving them back to me. Everytime I ask for my stuff back he agrees to meet up but never follows through. I have never contacted for… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi,

Do nc first and then the being there method after it.

260806345
Guest
My ex-boyfriend and I were together for 3 and a half years. He broke up with me. Now he is talking with a new girl. I don’t think it is anything serious, probably just a rebound. It has been a little over a month that we’ve been broken up. At the beginning of our breakup, I didn’t take it well, and he knows that. He has still has some of my things but avoids giving them back to me. Everytime I ask for my stuff back he agrees to meet up but never follows through. I have never contacted for… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi,

Do nc first and then the being there method after it.

cambell
Guest

I lost trust in him because he was in florida playing baseball and he was acting completely different. he wasn’t acting like the sweet gentlemen I thought I knew. I thought maybe he was talking to someone else. He knew that I was upset and he didn’t do anything. I told him why I lost trust and he said “well that was me just hanging out with friends” and says that if I didn’t lose the trust we would still be together. what do i do?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Stop chasing.. Restart nc.. stick to at least 30 days, be active in improving yourself and in posting and keep doing that after nc while you slowly build rapport.

cambell
Guest

I lost trust in him because he was in florida playing baseball and he was acting completely different. he wasn’t acting like the sweet gentlemen I thought I knew. I thought maybe he was talking to someone else. He knew that I was upset and he didn’t do anything. I told him why I lost trust and he said “well that was me just hanging out with friends” and says that if I didn’t lose the trust we would still be together. what do i do?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Stop chasing.. Restart nc.. stick to at least 30 days, be active in improving yourself and in posting and keep doing that after nc while you slowly build rapport.

Cambell
Guest
ah, where do i even begin? it has ben 2 months since my ex and i have broken up. his reason for the breakup is because i “lost trust” in him. he’s been hot and cold and then all of the sudden, 2 days ago, he says he has moved on. tonight he was talking about her, saying how she’s so nice, beautiful, family-oriented, christ-centered girl, etc. the funny thing is that i am also all of those things. he then said he still wants us to be friends. so, here are my questions. -how do i prove to him… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Cambell,

shouldn’t he be the one worried how to get your trust back? Because trust is earned, is not just something you give.. why did you lose trust in him?

Cambell
Guest
ah, where do i even begin? it has ben 2 months since my ex and i have broken up. his reason for the breakup is because i “lost trust” in him. he’s been hot and cold and then all of the sudden, 2 days ago, he says he has moved on. tonight he was talking about her, saying how she’s so nice, beautiful, family-oriented, christ-centered girl, etc. the funny thing is that i am also all of those things. he then said he still wants us to be friends. so, here are my questions. -how do i prove to him… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Cambell,

shouldn’t he be the one worried how to get your trust back? Because trust is earned, is not just something you give.. why did you lose trust in him?

Ell nyo
Guest
Hi Me and my bf were in relationship since 2 and 1/2 years.before me..he had a relationship and cheated on her with me and I was unaware that he already had gf.after it got revealed later he finally accepted and made it clear that he loves me not his ex gf as they always have fights and etc and feelings for her is gone.so..after they finally broke up ..he came with me for a chance.and as I was stupid enough I gave him a chance.before that I interacted with his gf about the matter and she was not at all… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
Ell nyo
Guest
Hi Me and my bf were in relationship since 2 and 1/2 years.before me..he had a relationship and cheated on her with me and I was unaware that he already had gf.after it got revealed later he finally accepted and made it clear that he loves me not his ex gf as they always have fights and etc and feelings for her is gone.so..after they finally broke up ..he came with me for a chance.and as I was stupid enough I gave him a chance.before that I interacted with his gf about the matter and she was not at all… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
Confused
Guest
Hi, My ex and I were together for a year and we broke up in October so it’s been ages. Since we broke up we hooked up in December again in April when he told me he loves me and again in June stupidly. In June he told me he still really cares about me and we had a nice chat about our relationship and he asked if we could be friends I told him no, and he asked me to make an exception. I left the country 2 weeks later to go travelling he kept in touch the whole… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi COnfused,

do you work in the same place?

Confused
Guest
Okay so sorry to bombard you with all these messages this is the last I promise. Do you think I’m doing the right thing? So my ex finally contacted me yesterday to say that nothing has to change and he has no problem being my friend as long as there’s no drama. To this is haven’t responded and I still think I will do the NC for a while then try the being there method just bc I don’t want to seem eager. The fact that he still wants me as a friend makes me think he’s not that serious… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

That’s ok, sorry for the late reply. Yep, that’s the right thing to do and maintain the new routine you started during nc and keep being active in posting.

Confused
Guest
Hi, My ex and I were together for a year and we broke up in October so it’s been ages. Since we broke up we hooked up in December again in April when he told me he loves me and again in June stupidly. In June he told me he still really cares about me and we had a nice chat about our relationship and he asked if we could be friends I told him no, and he asked me to make an exception. I left the country 2 weeks later to go travelling he kept in touch the whole… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi COnfused,

do you work in the same place?

Confused
Guest
Okay so sorry to bombard you with all these messages this is the last I promise. Do you think I’m doing the right thing? So my ex finally contacted me yesterday to say that nothing has to change and he has no problem being my friend as long as there’s no drama. To this is haven’t responded and I still think I will do the NC for a while then try the being there method just bc I don’t want to seem eager. The fact that he still wants me as a friend makes me think he’s not that serious… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

That’s ok, sorry for the late reply. Yep, that’s the right thing to do and maintain the new routine you started during nc and keep being active in posting.

Squirrel
Guest
I forget to mention about the mean fight in the second year, i did something horrible…I was hurted by his words, angry, sad and so on….drunk that night and while passing him on the stairs I hit his chin for a short moment as he said something mean again. I felt instant sorry after this and never wanted to hurt him in any way…was a horrible feeling but he never forget this neither and when he broke up with me brought this up again. Along with other fights we had. And then on the other hand like a day later… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Squirrel,

just to make it clear, he’s still going to live with you after going to Chile?

Squirrel
Guest
Hey, I really need help right now because I am really depressed and feel so helpless about our break up… I try to explain it as good as possible since english isn’t my mother language. 🙂 My boyfriend and I were together for 4 years (just had our anniversary at the end of may…). We are both 27 years old. He broke up with me mid june 2017 telling me that he is done with the relation and gave up. He thinks he was in a long broken relation with me and that he was the only one trying to… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Squirrel,

just to make it clear, he’s still going to live with you after going to Chile?

Squirrel
Guest
I forget to mention about the mean fight in the second year, i did something horrible…I was hurted by his words, angry, sad and so on….drunk that night and while passing him on the stairs I hit his chin for a short moment as he said something mean again. I felt instant sorry after this and never wanted to hurt him in any way…was a horrible feeling but he never forget this neither and when he broke up with me brought this up again. Along with other fights we had. And then on the other hand like a day later… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Squirrel,

just to make it clear, he’s still going to live with you after going to Chile?

Squirrel
Guest
Hey, I really need help right now because I am really depressed and feel so helpless about our break up… I try to explain it as good as possible since english isn’t my mother language. 🙂 My boyfriend and I were together for 4 years (just had our anniversary at the end of may…). We are both 27 years old. He broke up with me mid june 2017 telling me that he is done with the relation and gave up. He thinks he was in a long broken relation with me and that he was the only one trying to… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Squirrel,

just to make it clear, he’s still going to live with you after going to Chile?

Gabby
Guest

Help!!! After 30+ days of NC I texted him yesterday, we answered my after just a few minutes, I texted him back y he also replied, I wanted to ended the conversation si I said I had to leave but the we can continue talking other day?? He replied that he doesn’t think that’s a good idea since he is dating someone and that is not correct!!! What should I do now!!!!

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

rest for 3-5 days before initiating again.

Gabby
Guest

Help!!! After 30+ days of NC I texted him yesterday, we answered my after just a few minutes, I texted him back y he also replied, I wanted to ended the conversation si I said I had to leave but the we can continue talking other day?? He replied that he doesn’t think that’s a good idea since he is dating someone and that is not correct!!! What should I do now!!!!

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

rest for 3-5 days before initiating again.

Jane
Guest
Hi Amor, I would be grateful for your advice. I’ve met him online, we’ve been talking for over a year and making plans to meet in person. It was lovely and so exciting. But he disappeared one month before we were about to finally meet. It hurts me because he has been saying he wants me and can’t wait to be with me for so long. I haven’t texted him since he stopped, I had hopes he will.. But 3 months passed and nothing. Lately I discovered he has a new girlfriend and they seem so happy. I feel terrible..… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi jane,

If it’s for closure, send him a message, and whether or not he replies, let that message be your closure and move on

Jane
Guest
Hi Amor, I would be grateful for your advice. I’ve met him online, we’ve been talking for over a year and making plans to meet in person. It was lovely and so exciting. But he disappeared one month before we were about to finally meet. It hurts me because he has been saying he wants me and can’t wait to be with me for so long. I haven’t texted him since he stopped, I had hopes he will.. But 3 months passed and nothing. Lately I discovered he has a new girlfriend and they seem so happy. I feel terrible..… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi jane,

If it’s for closure, send him a message, and whether or not he replies, let that message be your closure and move on

Clarisa
Guest
When my, now ex, bf and I started dating we had sex before he committed. We had been dating for about a month prior. After a few nights together I asked him if he was planning on being exclusive with me. He said yes, and we decided to be monogamous. After a few weeks of bliss and referring to me as his girlfriend and introducing me to some of his friends as such, he started to grow distant. He said it was due to work stress so I tried to become the super supportive gf. He grew more distant and… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Clarisa,

the being there method and engaging conversation consistently is after the nc period

Clarisa
Guest
When my, now ex, bf and I started dating we had sex before he committed. We had been dating for about a month prior. After a few nights together I asked him if he was planning on being exclusive with me. He said yes, and we decided to be monogamous. After a few weeks of bliss and referring to me as his girlfriend and introducing me to some of his friends as such, he started to grow distant. He said it was due to work stress so I tried to become the super supportive gf. He grew more distant and… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

HI Clarisa,

the being there method and engaging conversation consistently is after the nc period

Jess
Guest
Hi, I was with my ex 2 years we split a little over a year ago but remained talking to each other each day and meeting up as we both had feelings and I thought we were trying to sort things out He ended up getting a girlfriend last year and she hated me even to say my name would cause an argument I stoped talking to my ex doing the no contact rule for a full month and my ex came back to me he initiated is talking again.. few months later they split up but I us to… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
Jess
Guest

Hi amor,
I don’t understand how this will help my situation we aren’t together and haven’t been for almost a year now
He has a new girlfriend and is still talking to me telling me he loves me and not to believe what I see on social media but it looks pretty real t me..
I’m at a breaking point right now I don’t know what to do!

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

actually I think the How To Set Your Boyfriend Straight part can help you. You just have to adjust it to your situation. Specifically this phrase:
Challenge him to lay his cards on the table. Make it clear in no uncertain terms that if the two of your are going to “work” he needs to come clean with the truth.

Jess
Guest
Hi, I was with my ex 2 years we split a little over a year ago but remained talking to each other each day and meeting up as we both had feelings and I thought we were trying to sort things out He ended up getting a girlfriend last year and she hated me even to say my name would cause an argument I stoped talking to my ex doing the no contact rule for a full month and my ex came back to me he initiated is talking again.. few months later they split up but I us to… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
Jess
Guest

Hi amor,
I don’t understand how this will help my situation we aren’t together and haven’t been for almost a year now
He has a new girlfriend and is still talking to me telling me he loves me and not to believe what I see on social media but it looks pretty real t me..
I’m at a breaking point right now I don’t know what to do!

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

actually I think the How To Set Your Boyfriend Straight part can help you. You just have to adjust it to your situation. Specifically this phrase:
Challenge him to lay his cards on the table. Make it clear in no uncertain terms that if the two of your are going to “work” he needs to come clean with the truth.

Megan
Guest

We dated for 4 years, mutually decided to end it. I worked on myself to become a better person, while living 8 hours away. 6 months went by, he started dating someone new. We are in the same place now at the 7 month point and I realized that we might be making a mistake. Since he is dating someone should I still do the 30 day no contact rule or should I do the “be there” theory?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

If you improved yourself and still does, you should start the being there method.

Megan
Guest

We dated for 4 years, mutually decided to end it. I worked on myself to become a better person, while living 8 hours away. 6 months went by, he started dating someone new. We are in the same place now at the 7 month point and I realized that we might be making a mistake. Since he is dating someone should I still do the 30 day no contact rule or should I do the “be there” theory?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

If you improved yourself and still does, you should start the being there method.

Tahni
Guest
Hey folks, So some info: boyfriend of 3.5 years breaks it off with me a little over a month ago. I’m 25, he’s 24. All in all we were great, but he said he had inner issues, didn’t want to drag me down, loves me, I’m the best girlfriend he’s ever had, that I deserve a better man than him, doesn’t know if he’s still in love with me but still loves me, doesn’t want to hurt me. The works. Mind you, about 1.5 years ago he did cheat on me, got poss drunk and kissed another girl and told… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Yup you should just continue slowly building rapport slowly

Tahni
Guest
So update: we’ve been talking more. He’s been getting into asking what I’m doing. Still brings up our past relationship and says things like he wish he could have gave me more, reminisce’s about it with me, even said too bad we didn’t have our own place together, and every now and then made comments about future activities with me.. like what we could be for halloween. I’m going crazy because I know he hasn’t stopped talking to that rebound. He’s asked if I’ve been with anyone else and said he wondered because he knew I was a great woman… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

He would really tell her what she wanted to hear..that’s why you just need to keep building rapport..he must have just reacted to you deleting his photos

Tahni
Guest
I’ve been trying to continue to build rapport by continuing to talk to him. But since that day we’ve deleted the last of each other’s pictures off of our instagrams, he hasn’t been talking to me as much… I try to hook him back into wanting to talk, by talling about things that interests him, waiting a while between replies every now and then to seem like I’m busy but not too busy, and always trying to end the conversation first on a good note or with something I can come back and reply to. But the distance I’m starting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Well, right now because he thinks you’re still affected or upset because of the deleting of pictures, you have to lay low maybe for a week and then initiate again

Tahni
Guest
Hey folks, So some info: boyfriend of 3.5 years breaks it off with me a little over a month ago. I’m 25, he’s 24. All in all we were great, but he said he had inner issues, didn’t want to drag me down, loves me, I’m the best girlfriend he’s ever had, that I deserve a better man than him, doesn’t know if he’s still in love with me but still loves me, doesn’t want to hurt me. The works. Mind you, about 1.5 years ago he did cheat on me, got poss drunk and kissed another girl and told… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Yup you should just continue slowly building rapport slowly

Tahni
Guest
So update: we’ve been talking more. He’s been getting into asking what I’m doing. Still brings up our past relationship and says things like he wish he could have gave me more, reminisce’s about it with me, even said too bad we didn’t have our own place together, and every now and then made comments about future activities with me.. like what we could be for halloween. I’m going crazy because I know he hasn’t stopped talking to that rebound. He’s asked if I’ve been with anyone else and said he wondered because he knew I was a great woman… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

He would really tell her what she wanted to hear..that’s why you just need to keep building rapport..he must have just reacted to you deleting his photos

Tahni
Guest
I’ve been trying to continue to build rapport by continuing to talk to him. But since that day we’ve deleted the last of each other’s pictures off of our instagrams, he hasn’t been talking to me as much… I try to hook him back into wanting to talk, by talling about things that interests him, waiting a while between replies every now and then to seem like I’m busy but not too busy, and always trying to end the conversation first on a good note or with something I can come back and reply to. But the distance I’m starting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Well, right now because he thinks you’re still affected or upset because of the deleting of pictures, you have to lay low maybe for a week and then initiate again

Astrid
Guest
Hi, My bf (26 yo) and I (22 yo) were together for 4 months (last summer) and then we went to study in different states and agreed to separate. He had a gf after me and I was seeing one guy as well, but we have been good friends and we get along soooo well. We stopped talking to each other for few months and now that we are back home we are seeing each other again. We are meeting every week, laughing, touching hands, hugging, reminiscing the past and planning on going for holidays together in July. Unfortunately –… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi astrid,

Are you going to do the advice above?

Astrid
Guest
Tbh i was going crazy because of the whole situation and in order to avoid any drama we met and i told him that he is the best guy ive known, wished him well and said that i will always love him but I wont fight with other girl for him. I think he accepted it and now we are not talking. It is very painful but i will do NC for a month or two, but i think it might be over. He is looking to settle down and because i live in a different state i dont think… Read more »
Astrid
Guest
Hi, My bf (26 yo) and I (22 yo) were together for 4 months (last summer) and then we went to study in different states and agreed to separate. He had a gf after me and I was seeing one guy as well, but we have been good friends and we get along soooo well. We stopped talking to each other for few months and now that we are back home we are seeing each other again. We are meeting every week, laughing, touching hands, hugging, reminiscing the past and planning on going for holidays together in July. Unfortunately –… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi astrid,

Are you going to do the advice above?

Astrid
Guest
Tbh i was going crazy because of the whole situation and in order to avoid any drama we met and i told him that he is the best guy ive known, wished him well and said that i will always love him but I wont fight with other girl for him. I think he accepted it and now we are not talking. It is very painful but i will do NC for a month or two, but i think it might be over. He is looking to settle down and because i live in a different state i dont think… Read more »
Jadyn
Guest
I understand this being there technique. And I see how it could pull him and the rebound apart. I just don’t know where to start. It feels so unnatural to text him after being broken up for 2 months. I miss him so much. I want to text him. I wish I could fast forward past the awkward initial contacts. I feel so fake trying to come up with messages to send. Sure I have memories I can remind him of and afew stories from our time apart that I could share. But those topics will only last so long.… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

List out his interests, everything you can think of and if there are current ones in the news, friends or in the environment, use that..

Jadyn
Guest
I understand this being there technique. And I see how it could pull him and the rebound apart. I just don’t know where to start. It feels so unnatural to text him after being broken up for 2 months. I miss him so much. I want to text him. I wish I could fast forward past the awkward initial contacts. I feel so fake trying to come up with messages to send. Sure I have memories I can remind him of and afew stories from our time apart that I could share. But those topics will only last so long.… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

List out his interests, everything you can think of and if there are current ones in the news, friends or in the environment, use that..

Olivia
Guest
CHRIS PLEASE HELP. I have been talking to my ex for about 5 months now – after not speaking for many following the breakup. NOW I have been acting like we are dating, visiting, talking daily, friends, family all involved, and I read messages on his phone where he has been tagging other girls on Instagram. A couple of these notes read “we should go here” as in together. I know we aren’t exclusive yet even tho we have acted as such for a few months now but does it mean he isn’t serious about me if he is asking… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why arent you talking about being exclusive?

Olivia
Guest

I guess my fear is that he just agrees to be exclusive but doesn’t actually follow through. If we’ve already been talking for this long and he’s STILL messaging other girls about going on dates, hikes, etc together….. does that mean he doesn’t want to be exclusive with me? Also he doesn’t know that I know he’s talking to other girls like this.

Olivia
Guest

and I did bring up being exclusive and he said yes, he’s already been acting like hes dating me… but, it doesn’t seem like it when I read his phone and he is trying to do activities with other girls. I guess I am just wondering if it is normal that he is still interested in doing these things with other girls all the while telling me he wants to date me. It doesn’t add up in my head.

Olivia
Guest
He sent another note to a new girl asking her to go on a hike and sending her pictures of the hiking place and being flirty. WHY is he reaching out to other girls if he claims he is serious about me and wants to be with only me???? Is he unsure about me??? Is he playing me??? Does he need attention since we are LD??? What do you think is going on in his head? We had a talk a few days ago and pretty much decided we are “dating exclusively”…….. why is he continuing this behavior behind my… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

That means he’s not serious.. You have to let more time pass so it’s credible to bring it up to him

Olivia
Guest
We had a talk and I casually brought up the messages saying someone told me about it… he says these are all girl “friends” and he is going to continue to have girl friends… But, one of them I have never heard of and really don’t think they are friends. Anyways, in this talk I also said I need to be his gf or nothing, i cant do the inbetween with somone who i dated for so long. he said he wants to be exclusive and in a relationship with me but didn’t act that excited about it…. rather just… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

keep your word.. if you really dont want him talking to other girls, thrn dont stay..or he’ll just keep doing it if you stay because you stayed.. why would he change when you’re still there? That means you’re the one not being serious with your standards.. that means you can do the inbetween because you didn’t leave

Olivia
Guest
Well we weren’t exclusive when he was messaging these girls. And when i asked him about it he told me they are just friends. i cant really prove they are any more than that at this point… I would think now that we are exclusive and I have set my standards…. if he breaks them now or isnt loyal I would stand by my word and end it. You think since he was messaging girls when we werent exclusive yet that i gave him the impression that its okay to do that and that i will stick around if he… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

nope of course not.. that’s why you’re setting it clear now.. it’s a different story if he keeps doing it whne you’re you already made it clear that you and him are exclusive.

Olivia
Guest
Hi again. So after your last note I made it clear that I won’t be okay with him asking these girls to do 1:1 activities or being flirty in messages and he agreed, (and also denied ever messaging one of these girls, or at least pretended like he didnt remember…) he said if i ever feel that hes inviting other girls on dates for my own good i should end things with him but that he has no interest in doing that. Everything has been going great, he has been treating me really well and we have been visiting one… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Talk to him about it..trust is earned..It’s not something that depends on others.. If you dont trust that person that means he/she didn’t earn it

Olivia
Guest
CHRIS PLEASE HELP. I have been talking to my ex for about 5 months now – after not speaking for many following the breakup. NOW I have been acting like we are dating, visiting, talking daily, friends, family all involved, and I read messages on his phone where he has been tagging other girls on Instagram. A couple of these notes read “we should go here” as in together. I know we aren’t exclusive yet even tho we have acted as such for a few months now but does it mean he isn’t serious about me if he is asking… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why arent you talking about being exclusive?

Olivia
Guest

I guess my fear is that he just agrees to be exclusive but doesn’t actually follow through. If we’ve already been talking for this long and he’s STILL messaging other girls about going on dates, hikes, etc together….. does that mean he doesn’t want to be exclusive with me? Also he doesn’t know that I know he’s talking to other girls like this.

Olivia
Guest

and I did bring up being exclusive and he said yes, he’s already been acting like hes dating me… but, it doesn’t seem like it when I read his phone and he is trying to do activities with other girls. I guess I am just wondering if it is normal that he is still interested in doing these things with other girls all the while telling me he wants to date me. It doesn’t add up in my head.

Olivia
Guest
He sent another note to a new girl asking her to go on a hike and sending her pictures of the hiking place and being flirty. WHY is he reaching out to other girls if he claims he is serious about me and wants to be with only me???? Is he unsure about me??? Is he playing me??? Does he need attention since we are LD??? What do you think is going on in his head? We had a talk a few days ago and pretty much decided we are “dating exclusively”…….. why is he continuing this behavior behind my… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

That means he’s not serious.. You have to let more time pass so it’s credible to bring it up to him

Olivia
Guest
We had a talk and I casually brought up the messages saying someone told me about it… he says these are all girl “friends” and he is going to continue to have girl friends… But, one of them I have never heard of and really don’t think they are friends. Anyways, in this talk I also said I need to be his gf or nothing, i cant do the inbetween with somone who i dated for so long. he said he wants to be exclusive and in a relationship with me but didn’t act that excited about it…. rather just… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

keep your word.. if you really dont want him talking to other girls, thrn dont stay..or he’ll just keep doing it if you stay because you stayed.. why would he change when you’re still there? That means you’re the one not being serious with your standards.. that means you can do the inbetween because you didn’t leave

Olivia
Guest
Well we weren’t exclusive when he was messaging these girls. And when i asked him about it he told me they are just friends. i cant really prove they are any more than that at this point… I would think now that we are exclusive and I have set my standards…. if he breaks them now or isnt loyal I would stand by my word and end it. You think since he was messaging girls when we werent exclusive yet that i gave him the impression that its okay to do that and that i will stick around if he… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

nope of course not.. that’s why you’re setting it clear now.. it’s a different story if he keeps doing it whne you’re you already made it clear that you and him are exclusive.

Olivia
Guest
Hi again. So after your last note I made it clear that I won’t be okay with him asking these girls to do 1:1 activities or being flirty in messages and he agreed, (and also denied ever messaging one of these girls, or at least pretended like he didnt remember…) he said if i ever feel that hes inviting other girls on dates for my own good i should end things with him but that he has no interest in doing that. Everything has been going great, he has been treating me really well and we have been visiting one… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Talk to him about it..trust is earned..It’s not something that depends on others.. If you dont trust that person that means he/she didn’t earn it

Ryan
Guest
My ex boyfriend broke up w me 2 months ago and left me for another guy. A month into that relationship they broke up but just yesterday he told me they got back together again. I can see that my ex still cares about me as he didn’t want to hurt me by telling me that they were back together until I kind of drilled it out of him. Is this still considered a rebound or GIGS? I really do want to try and get a second chance but he also mentioned he feels that what he has done is… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

being nice? he left you twice for the same guy, that will show you have no standards.. either you do a no contact period or move on.

Ryan
Guest
My ex boyfriend broke up w me 2 months ago and left me for another guy. A month into that relationship they broke up but just yesterday he told me they got back together again. I can see that my ex still cares about me as he didn’t want to hurt me by telling me that they were back together until I kind of drilled it out of him. Is this still considered a rebound or GIGS? I really do want to try and get a second chance but he also mentioned he feels that what he has done is… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

being nice? he left you twice for the same guy, that will show you have no standards.. either you do a no contact period or move on.

Jemma S
Guest
I have been back in touch with my ex for about 4 months now. We dated for about 3 years and didn’t talk for about 6 months after we mutually broke up due to distance/fighting. We are still in a distance relationship (2 hour by plane) but he has been pursuing me for about 3 months now- comes to visit, invites me to family and friend gatherings, texts me almost daily, calls me… and so on. After we broke up there was another girl that he started to “date” but lied to me about. She was always posting pictures of… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why not ask him about it?

Jemma S
Guest

I guess I am nervous he won’t be honest about it since he tried to hide it from me last time and knows I wouldn’t be okay with it. (if they are more than just friends this time around) I am also angry that he has been leading me on to believe he wants to date me, only for me to find out there is someone else in the picture that he has feelings for. I feel confused. Why would he say he wants to try things with me again and then also be talking to someone else?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

it would still be better to ask instead of assume.. if he lies, that means you’re right, he is leading you on..can be because he’s trying to gauage which one he has a safer chance with

Jemma S
Guest
SO I asked him if he’s seeing anyone else. He responded he doesn’t know what / who I am talking about and the only girl he has been interested in dating seriously since we broke up or would even consider dating is me. I would assume she is the safer bet since they live in the same place and him and I are LD which makes things harder. I wish I would have worded my inquiry differently – and asked if he is talking to anyone else. I visited him and he left himself logged in on my computer and… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why not ask to be exclusive?

Jemma S
Guest
I have been back in touch with my ex for about 4 months now. We dated for about 3 years and didn’t talk for about 6 months after we mutually broke up due to distance/fighting. We are still in a distance relationship (2 hour by plane) but he has been pursuing me for about 3 months now- comes to visit, invites me to family and friend gatherings, texts me almost daily, calls me… and so on. After we broke up there was another girl that he started to “date” but lied to me about. She was always posting pictures of… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why not ask him about it?

Jemma S
Guest

I guess I am nervous he won’t be honest about it since he tried to hide it from me last time and knows I wouldn’t be okay with it. (if they are more than just friends this time around) I am also angry that he has been leading me on to believe he wants to date me, only for me to find out there is someone else in the picture that he has feelings for. I feel confused. Why would he say he wants to try things with me again and then also be talking to someone else?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

it would still be better to ask instead of assume.. if he lies, that means you’re right, he is leading you on..can be because he’s trying to gauage which one he has a safer chance with

Jemma S
Guest
SO I asked him if he’s seeing anyone else. He responded he doesn’t know what / who I am talking about and the only girl he has been interested in dating seriously since we broke up or would even consider dating is me. I would assume she is the safer bet since they live in the same place and him and I are LD which makes things harder. I wish I would have worded my inquiry differently – and asked if he is talking to anyone else. I visited him and he left himself logged in on my computer and… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

why not ask to be exclusive?

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor My ex boyfriend and I have a long history for a couple of years now. We’ve been together for just a couple of months, more than two years ago, but we kept seeing each other and tried to just remain friends.. He broke up with me as I was going to move to another city a couple of hours away and he didn’t wanted to try a long distance. Eventually it took a while and I just moved a couple of months ago. At this moment he’s having a new girlfriend: there together for a few months now,… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Giulia,

when was that conversation? For now, let him be..

Giulia
Guest

2,5 to 3 weeks ago. Between then and now they were on a holiday for a week and I guess he didn’t wanted to break up with her just a few days before their week off and ruin everything..
I haven’t texted or talked with him during their week off.

So it is better if I don’t ask him anything about his current situation and thaughts with/about his girlfriend?
Or can I ask it, but not explicity, just if it comes up during our conversations in some way?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

don’t ask for now.. have you done the no contact period?

Giulia
Guest

Thank you for the advice.
Yes I have done the no contact period for 31 days, a few months ago when I moved to the other city.

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ok.. just dont ask for now..keep building rapport

Giulia
Guest

If he doesn’t mention anything, when will be right to ask him about it?
In a week or in two weeks? Or only if he mentions anything in the conversation?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

let a week pass first.. so that you’ve given him enough time before asking that yourself

Giulia
Guest

Today he told me about his current situation with his girlfriend and he said he felt fine and everything’s alright betweend them.. Do you have any advice for me to do? Is this just a matter of time and should I wait and act like I do now in our conversations? Or should I do something else or do a new period of NC?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

just continue being there and building rapport

Giulia
Guest

Dear Amor,

I am trying to just be there, but as he has told me he suddenly feels fine for now with his girlfriend: he is acting really distant to me. He doesn’t ignore me, but he is always keeping our conversations short, says he’s busy and I feel like he isn’t engaged in our conversations or anything with me anymore. Is there anything I can do for now?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

that’s normal… that’s why you just have to keep doing what you’re doing while improving yourself too because he needs to see you’re the better option over time

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor I know I have asked for your advice a lot, but I am a bit confused richt now. Last week I went to my former city where I visites him as a surprise. I can tell you he really liked to see me by the look in his eyes and how he reacted and everything. Now I am back home and he’s acting distant again, which you explained to me, but I did also received some advice over the mail from the recovery team and you’re both giving me different advices. You’re advising me to just be there… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

was it leia? we can have different perspectives.. if she told you that after knowing that he became distant after you went there by surprise, that means we would have the same advice.. but if she did advice that before, you can choose which one you think is best.. But right, now, I would want you to do nc because you went there without enough rapport.. don’t rush things.. yeah, he was happy because he didn’t see you for a long time, but not because he really wanted to see you because he’s starting to get attracted again.

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor Thats alright, I knew I wasn’t the right time to do this.. I did it before but that was when I lived nearby and when he had asked me to come over. So I went by as a surprise back then and it worked great. But now I am getting really anxious about the whole situation. So I’m might doing stupid things and declining all my chances.. But that’s alright, I will do another nc. Yes I have recieved the other advice from Leia, but that was before I went to see him. But I understand I will… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

For me, yeah, do 30 days.. take your time.. if you need it to go 45, that’s ok..

Giulia
Guest

That’s alright. I will do a 30 day at first and if it feels better to do a 45 day I will extend it.

But is the intention to start everything all over again by implemend all the strategies with texting and phone calls or is the intention to just implemend the being there strategy?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

approach it like a restart, that means it will be day 1 of building rapport again after nc..dont stop improving yourself while building rapport

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor My ex boyfriend and I have a long history for a couple of years now. We’ve been together for just a couple of months, more than two years ago, but we kept seeing each other and tried to just remain friends.. He broke up with me as I was going to move to another city a couple of hours away and he didn’t wanted to try a long distance. Eventually it took a while and I just moved a couple of months ago. At this moment he’s having a new girlfriend: there together for a few months now,… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Giulia,

when was that conversation? For now, let him be..

Giulia
Guest

2,5 to 3 weeks ago. Between then and now they were on a holiday for a week and I guess he didn’t wanted to break up with her just a few days before their week off and ruin everything..
I haven’t texted or talked with him during their week off.

So it is better if I don’t ask him anything about his current situation and thaughts with/about his girlfriend?
Or can I ask it, but not explicity, just if it comes up during our conversations in some way?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

don’t ask for now.. have you done the no contact period?

Giulia
Guest

Thank you for the advice.
Yes I have done the no contact period for 31 days, a few months ago when I moved to the other city.

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ok.. just dont ask for now..keep building rapport

Giulia
Guest

If he doesn’t mention anything, when will be right to ask him about it?
In a week or in two weeks? Or only if he mentions anything in the conversation?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

let a week pass first.. so that you’ve given him enough time before asking that yourself

Giulia
Guest

Today he told me about his current situation with his girlfriend and he said he felt fine and everything’s alright betweend them.. Do you have any advice for me to do? Is this just a matter of time and should I wait and act like I do now in our conversations? Or should I do something else or do a new period of NC?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

just continue being there and building rapport

Giulia
Guest

Dear Amor,

I am trying to just be there, but as he has told me he suddenly feels fine for now with his girlfriend: he is acting really distant to me. He doesn’t ignore me, but he is always keeping our conversations short, says he’s busy and I feel like he isn’t engaged in our conversations or anything with me anymore. Is there anything I can do for now?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

that’s normal… that’s why you just have to keep doing what you’re doing while improving yourself too because he needs to see you’re the better option over time

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor I know I have asked for your advice a lot, but I am a bit confused richt now. Last week I went to my former city where I visites him as a surprise. I can tell you he really liked to see me by the look in his eyes and how he reacted and everything. Now I am back home and he’s acting distant again, which you explained to me, but I did also received some advice over the mail from the recovery team and you’re both giving me different advices. You’re advising me to just be there… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

was it leia? we can have different perspectives.. if she told you that after knowing that he became distant after you went there by surprise, that means we would have the same advice.. but if she did advice that before, you can choose which one you think is best.. But right, now, I would want you to do nc because you went there without enough rapport.. don’t rush things.. yeah, he was happy because he didn’t see you for a long time, but not because he really wanted to see you because he’s starting to get attracted again.

Giulia
Guest
Dear Amor Thats alright, I knew I wasn’t the right time to do this.. I did it before but that was when I lived nearby and when he had asked me to come over. So I went by as a surprise back then and it worked great. But now I am getting really anxious about the whole situation. So I’m might doing stupid things and declining all my chances.. But that’s alright, I will do another nc. Yes I have recieved the other advice from Leia, but that was before I went to see him. But I understand I will… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

For me, yeah, do 30 days.. take your time.. if you need it to go 45, that’s ok..

Giulia
Guest

That’s alright. I will do a 30 day at first and if it feels better to do a 45 day I will extend it.

But is the intention to start everything all over again by implemend all the strategies with texting and phone calls or is the intention to just implemend the being there strategy?

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

approach it like a restart, that means it will be day 1 of building rapport again after nc..dont stop improving yourself while building rapport

ale
Guest
Hi!!! i broke with my boyfriend 1.5 months ago. Went to the NC period of 23 days. i started texting him and he responded possitive. He told me that weekend he was going to be on vacation on a bachelor party, to Los Cabos (we are from Mexico). he uploaden pictures with his friends on the plane, and later, he uploaded 5 videos taken by his ex girlfriend (from 6 years ago, when they where in highschool, and everyone knows how slutty she is), they where in the beach, taking trips on a kayac, every video was taken by her,… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ale,

yes, you’re on the right path.. you can text during the vacay too..

ale
Guest
Hi!!! i broke with my boyfriend 1.5 months ago. Went to the NC period of 23 days. i started texting him and he responded possitive. He told me that weekend he was going to be on vacation on a bachelor party, to Los Cabos (we are from Mexico). he uploaden pictures with his friends on the plane, and later, he uploaded 5 videos taken by his ex girlfriend (from 6 years ago, when they where in highschool, and everyone knows how slutty she is), they where in the beach, taking trips on a kayac, every video was taken by her,… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Ale,

yes, you’re on the right path.. you can text during the vacay too..

drizzy
Guest
hi amor! you told me to read this article, and so i did. well the thing with my ex is he’s not dating this new girl, but they definitely have a thing. i’m not entirely sure how i can make myself present in his life when he doesn’t seem to care or want me. it hurts so bad seeing him with someone new, and him going out of his way for her like he used to do to me. i try to stay present by talking to him sometimes since he’s in my 2nd period. but i feel like he… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Honestly, it’s looking your best always, being your best. If it’s awkward for him, then don’t approach to talk much but smile if you bump into each other or you can try to be candid like tell him, “Hey, I’m moving soon. I hope I can leave with us being in good terms at least.”

drizzy
Guest
i would love to stay friends and definitely leave on good terms! do you think i should tell him right before i leave or sometime soon. do i pull him aside and ask to talk, or randomly go up to him and say that? i really just need that closure or just to know we’re on good terms. i wanna leave off on the right foot. even if i move, he’lol probably never speak to me again, but as long as i can tell him i’d like to be on good terms. how and when should i tell him? at… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

don’t make it so serious when you tell him, maybe when you pass by him at class when he’s alone or if you’re handing something over to him.

drizzy
Guest
i might be over dramatic or over thinking, but i can tell he’s happy liking this new girl. when he walked by me today, he barely smiled and he kinda gave me like this “don’t care about u” look. i think we both really just need to talk. it would be so good to communicate, but it’s not going to be that way only because i can tell he doesn’t want me near him. it hurts me. i’m sorry for being repetitive, but it’s going to be hard for me to straight up say “hey i’m moving soon, can we… Read more »
drizzy
Guest
& also, do you think it would be inappropriate of me to ask one of his friends? i was honestly thinking of opening up to his friend shane because shane and i are kinda close. like i said, him and i have allll mutual friends. it’s hard for them to pick “sides” i guess. i was wanting to go to shane just because he understands & he never has one sided opinions. i would love to go to my ex straight up, but i just don’t want to bother ESPECIALLY if he has a thing for someone else. i know… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

I would do it sooner and I would be indifferent to establish that he’s being silly being a snob but I wouldn’t involve his friends. Because if he doesn’t want to chase, involving his friends looks like chasing to him.

drizzy
Guest
hi amor! you told me to read this article, and so i did. well the thing with my ex is he’s not dating this new girl, but they definitely have a thing. i’m not entirely sure how i can make myself present in his life when he doesn’t seem to care or want me. it hurts so bad seeing him with someone new, and him going out of his way for her like he used to do to me. i try to stay present by talking to him sometimes since he’s in my 2nd period. but i feel like he… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Honestly, it’s looking your best always, being your best. If it’s awkward for him, then don’t approach to talk much but smile if you bump into each other or you can try to be candid like tell him, “Hey, I’m moving soon. I hope I can leave with us being in good terms at least.”

drizzy
Guest
i would love to stay friends and definitely leave on good terms! do you think i should tell him right before i leave or sometime soon. do i pull him aside and ask to talk, or randomly go up to him and say that? i really just need that closure or just to know we’re on good terms. i wanna leave off on the right foot. even if i move, he’lol probably never speak to me again, but as long as i can tell him i’d like to be on good terms. how and when should i tell him? at… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

don’t make it so serious when you tell him, maybe when you pass by him at class when he’s alone or if you’re handing something over to him.

drizzy
Guest
i might be over dramatic or over thinking, but i can tell he’s happy liking this new girl. when he walked by me today, he barely smiled and he kinda gave me like this “don’t care about u” look. i think we both really just need to talk. it would be so good to communicate, but it’s not going to be that way only because i can tell he doesn’t want me near him. it hurts me. i’m sorry for being repetitive, but it’s going to be hard for me to straight up say “hey i’m moving soon, can we… Read more »
drizzy
Guest
& also, do you think it would be inappropriate of me to ask one of his friends? i was honestly thinking of opening up to his friend shane because shane and i are kinda close. like i said, him and i have allll mutual friends. it’s hard for them to pick “sides” i guess. i was wanting to go to shane just because he understands & he never has one sided opinions. i would love to go to my ex straight up, but i just don’t want to bother ESPECIALLY if he has a thing for someone else. i know… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

I would do it sooner and I would be indifferent to establish that he’s being silly being a snob but I wouldn’t involve his friends. Because if he doesn’t want to chase, involving his friends looks like chasing to him.

Tam
Guest
Basically me and my ex broke up around a month ago and I’m 20 and he’s 25! (2 days before my birthday which is January 7 haha!) He didn’t want to break up before my birthday but a week prior to the breakup I was feeling it coming and I had anxiety about it so I told him we had to talk and so we ended up breaking up. He was nice enough to come to my birthday surprise on the 6th of jan and even wanted to take me out like he had planned for my birthday on jan… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
Hi Tam, It’s probaby his ego at play when he knew you dated other guys because he’s used to you being clingy to him. but more likely, she’s not a rebound.. no matter how incompatible you think they are, and how easy she is.. if he said you’re clingy and then went to her, then that leans more on the grass is greener case.. There’s something about her that he finds interesting.. As the cliche goes, actions speak louder than words..he told what’s pleasant and then did something else.. I think you should start with not explaining yourself always.. just… Read more »
Tam
Guest
Basically me and my ex broke up around a month ago and I’m 20 and he’s 25! (2 days before my birthday which is January 7 haha!) He didn’t want to break up before my birthday but a week prior to the breakup I was feeling it coming and I had anxiety about it so I told him we had to talk and so we ended up breaking up. He was nice enough to come to my birthday surprise on the 6th of jan and even wanted to take me out like he had planned for my birthday on jan… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor
Hi Tam, It’s probaby his ego at play when he knew you dated other guys because he’s used to you being clingy to him. but more likely, she’s not a rebound.. no matter how incompatible you think they are, and how easy she is.. if he said you’re clingy and then went to her, then that leans more on the grass is greener case.. There’s something about her that he finds interesting.. As the cliche goes, actions speak louder than words..he told what’s pleasant and then did something else.. I think you should start with not explaining yourself always.. just… Read more »
Desiree
Guest
I just had a whirlwind no-sexual but very close relationship end abruptly. It only lasted a month and a half. He texted and called constantly. Told me he wanted to spend every moment with me and did so. He picked me up from work every night and always had an adventure or just wanted to go out to eat and always wanted to hold my hand. Even progressed into telling me he loves me. We did so many fun things together in such a short time. He was completely respectful, even telling me that he loved me more for waiting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Desiree,

I’m not familiar with how your culture is, but do you greet each other condolences on death of a family every year even if so many years had passed? If you’re going to do nc, better to not greet him..

Desiree
Guest
Yes if you know and don’t reach out with words of comfort it’s kinda not nice. it’s common to express yearly condolences because latinos grieve and commemorate yearly with flowers in the home, trips to the gravesite (which is especially difficult and sad if you can’t go because you are out of the country so tgen you’re expressing a deeper level of sadness for the hurt added to injury) and special dinners. People always relive it. You’ve heard of the Day of the Dead? Commemorating a loved one’s death is a big thing and another loved one would be considered… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ah.. well, if it’s really like that then yes, greet him.. but only make it about that.. the chances actually depend more on your mindset and improvement..if she’s an ungettable girl, give her a good fight by focusing in improving yourself first. continue that even building rapport, if it doesnt work later on then move on
dont give up too early just because you worry about them

Desiree
Guest

Thank you. I’ll offer my condolences and follow a text example I read here somewhere about saying I need to work on me now, but nothing more, and begin 30 days nc. Thank you

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ok, you’re welcome!

Desiree
Guest
I just had a whirlwind no-sexual but very close relationship end abruptly. It only lasted a month and a half. He texted and called constantly. Told me he wanted to spend every moment with me and did so. He picked me up from work every night and always had an adventure or just wanted to go out to eat and always wanted to hold my hand. Even progressed into telling me he loves me. We did so many fun things together in such a short time. He was completely respectful, even telling me that he loved me more for waiting… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Desiree,

I’m not familiar with how your culture is, but do you greet each other condolences on death of a family every year even if so many years had passed? If you’re going to do nc, better to not greet him..

Desiree
Guest
Yes if you know and don’t reach out with words of comfort it’s kinda not nice. it’s common to express yearly condolences because latinos grieve and commemorate yearly with flowers in the home, trips to the gravesite (which is especially difficult and sad if you can’t go because you are out of the country so tgen you’re expressing a deeper level of sadness for the hurt added to injury) and special dinners. People always relive it. You’ve heard of the Day of the Dead? Commemorating a loved one’s death is a big thing and another loved one would be considered… Read more »
EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ah.. well, if it’s really like that then yes, greet him.. but only make it about that.. the chances actually depend more on your mindset and improvement..if she’s an ungettable girl, give her a good fight by focusing in improving yourself first. continue that even building rapport, if it doesnt work later on then move on
dont give up too early just because you worry about them

Desiree
Guest

Thank you. I’ll offer my condolences and follow a text example I read here somewhere about saying I need to work on me now, but nothing more, and begin 30 days nc. Thank you

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

ok, you’re welcome!

Lilly
Guest

What if your ex and you broke up in November and you found out in January he is dating a new person is that rebound too ? And he told me to move on when I texted him a flirty message. Also I have texted him and he always opens them and it says read but he never respond we dated for a year. So yea I can’t be there since he doesn’t want to talk to me right now.

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lilly,

do you want to try the no contact and then follow the advice above?

Lilly
Guest

What if your ex and you broke up in November and you found out in January he is dating a new person is that rebound too ? And he told me to move on when I texted him a flirty message. Also I have texted him and he always opens them and it says read but he never respond we dated for a year. So yea I can’t be there since he doesn’t want to talk to me right now.

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Lilly,

do you want to try the no contact and then follow the advice above?

Eeda
Guest

Hi, so does the being there strategy mean that you should friendzone yourself on purpose? What about if the ex boyfriend wanted to stay friends after the breakup but you declined when he told you about the new girl? It’s been only a month after the breakup I think it’s a rebound

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Eeda,

yep you should act friendly on purpose

Eeda
Guest

Hi, so does the being there strategy mean that you should friendzone yourself on purpose? What about if the ex boyfriend wanted to stay friends after the breakup but you declined when he told you about the new girl? It’s been only a month after the breakup I think it’s a rebound

EBR Team Member: Amor
Guest
EBR Team Member: Amor

Hi Eeda,

yep you should act friendly on purpose