Today we are going to be encountering your worst fear.
Having your ex move on to someone else in front of your eyes.
Specifically we are going to be taking a look at the signs that you can keep an eye out for if this fate has transpired.
Now, if you don’t know how I roll then you are in for a treat. Any time I write an article like this I like to go above and beyond by providing unique studies and experiences to back up my theories.
In this case, I am going to draw from personal experience to explain some of these signs to you.
Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado I present the five signs that your ex is dating someone else.
5 Signs That Your Ex Is Probably Dating Someone Else
Before I start listing the signs I do want to point out that I am not going to limit these signs to your ex having to be in an actual relationship with someone new.
I think if they have a crush on someone else these signs can be present as well.
And it’s kind of the same heartbreaking outcome that you don’t want to occur to you.
As I stated above, there are five big signs that you need to pay attention to.
- Their Social Media Behavior Changes
- You Hear About It From Mutual Friends
- They Don’t Respond To Your Attempts Of Communication
- The Pendulum Swing Occurs More Frequently
- They Tell You Specifically They Can’t Talk To You Anymore
Let’s peel back the layers and explain what to expect with these five signs.
Sign #1: Your Exes Social Media Behavior Changes
I’ve been off the market for a long time now.
Coming up on four years now.
Wow, time flies!
Anyways, one of the most drastic changes I noticed that occurred when I got into a relationship with my wife was how differently I treated social media.
I was very conscious of the fact that even the most seemingly insignificant thing like commenting on someones photo on Facebook can be taken out of context and create problems for you,
We live in the age of social media whether you like it or not where our every action is scrutinized.
Your ex isn’t blind to that fact.
Generally what I tell my clients to keep an eye out for are anything that interrupts the pattern on your exes social media profile.
For example, let’s pretend that after your breakup with your ex they still kept in touch with you by liking, commenting or even personal messaging you on Facebook.
One day that behavior completely changes.
The likes stop.
The comments are the next to go.
And you don’t even get a response when you reach out to your ex in personal messages.
What is going on?
It could be that they are literally gearing up for attracting someone else and they don’t want to have any baggage following them around.
Sign #2: You Hear About It From Mutual Friends
Are you familiar with the concept of an asterisk in baseball?
Baseball is very protective of its records.
Specifically the home run record.
In fact, if you look online you can find multiple cases where home run records were branded with an asterisk essentially saying that this player cheated and took steroids to achieve this record.
I’d like to place an asterisk on this sign because you always need to be careful of what you hear from mutual friends.
Have you ever played a game of telephone?
The game is really easy.
You basically get a bunch of people to stand in a line and then on one end of the line you share a message and you have the message passed down the line to see if it’s the same as when it was initially given,
In almost all the cases I’ve ever played I found that the message was completely different by the time that it went down the entire line.
The game is meant to highlight how people process information differently.
And how those subtle changes in the processing can completely change fact into fiction.
This is kind of how I view listening to other people about exes.
In most cases mutual friends will be on your side but how they process your ex “dating” might be completely made up.
Maybe they just saw your ex with a friend and assumed they were dating.
Always take what your mutual friends say with a grain of salt.
I’m not saying they will lie. I’m just saying that it’s important for you not to overreact.
Sign #3: Your Ex Doesn’t Respond To Any Of Your Attempts To Communicate
Personal story time!
When I started my college experience I falsely believed that dating wasn’t a numbers game.
It totally is.
That sounds completely unromantic but I’ve found it to be true.
What I’d end up doing was zone in on one specific girl I’d have a crush on and put everything I’d have into getting her to date me.
Sometimes I’d get the date and sometimes I wouldn’t.
But inevitably I’d always find something wrong with the person or they’d find something wrong with me.
The problem was that I’d average maybe 1 girl I’d find worthy a year and the end result was that I’d be alone.
If my math was right I was single for five years before I met my wife.
Well, around year four I started to look at dating as a numbers game.
In other words, the more girls I met the more chances I’d have to run them through my own internal processes to see if they were worthy.
I believe that when I met my soon to be wife I was talking to three other girls.
Talking to my wife was revolutionary. I hadn’t felt that way about anyone before.
In fact, she had such a strong pull on me that I decided to refine my efforts and only focus on her.
In other words, I stopped talking to every other potential prospect.
I’d do this one of two ways,
- By either ignoring them
- Or by blocking them
The blocking case was special and I’ll tell you about that story in a moment.
Ignoring the others was really interesting because you’d get all kinds of texts asking you where you went and whats happening.
I’d just ghost them because if I felt strongly about my wife to the point I didn’t want to talk to anyone else then I knew I’d never develop feelings for them.
What’s the point of being friends with someone when you weren’t looking for a friend in the first place?
Sign #4: The Pendulum Swings More Frequently
Most people aren’t like me.
Most are ok with remaining friends with their past lovers.
I think it’s just asking for trouble.
I didn’t criticize or scold him for being bad.
If anything, that’s on the girl for cheating on her boyfriend.
No, I was actually fascinated by what he told me next.
Man, we were at this gathering together and her boyfriend was there. It was so strange. All I could think about was the fact that I fu$ked this girl and her boyfriend was right there.
He told me that he noticed something interesting.
The girl was super short with her boyfriend.
Like she would swing from one end of the spectrum of emotions to the other.
One minute she would be scolding him in front of everyone and the other she would be making out with him in the corner.
She was doing this for my friends benefit of course.
Here’s the thing though, I’ve seen this pendulum swing of behavior a lot.
It’s something worth keeping an eye on if you are worried your ex has moved on to someone else.
Sign #5: Your Ex Tells You They Can’t Talk To You Anymore
Remember I told you in an example above that there was one person I flat out blocked when I first met my wife.
Here’s how that went down.
Initially I just ignored all three of the girls I was talking to.
I figured they’d get the hint but this one just wouldn’t quit bothering me.
Eventually I got annoyed enough that she wasn’t getting the hint so I flat out told her.
As you can imagine this didn’t go over very well as she berated me for being a “poor friend” and that just because I was “talking to someone” didn’t mean I couldn’t still talk to her.
But to me the risk wasn’t worth what little reward there would be.
Think of all the things that could go wrong if my wife, who had no clue what I was like yet would think if she thought I was talking to all kinds of girls at the same time as her.
It would look really bad.
I pride myself on being extremely loyal.
I’m a one woman kind of man.
I was then and I am now.
You may not agree with how I handled the situation but I am kind of proud of it because it goes to show that I knew even probably before my wife knew that I was going to fall in love.
In the end I blocked the loose cannon and moved on with my life.
I tell you this story not to dishearten you but to give you insight into the mind of someone when there is technically “someone else.””
These are the types of behaviors you can expect to receive from your ex if there is someone they are interested in.