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112 thoughts on “My Relationship Ended Badly; Can I Sill Get Him Back?”

  1. Anushree Saikia

    March 20, 2019 at 6:30 pm

    Hi, my story is a little unique and not in a good way. So, my ex and I were in a long distance relationship. I was working double just to support the relationship. I was managing my college and helping him with his academics and it was starting to take a toll on me. I am in college , so I get to see hundreds of happy couples and it felt awful to be not able to be doing those things. It was my first time being in a serious relationship and I actually didn’t know how far is too far and I asked for an open relationship. After a lot of convincing and logic, he reluctantly agreed. So I went forward with it. After that, he asked me a couple of times to back off but I felt so sinfullly good that I just couldn’t see how much I was hurting him but I did realize that it’s wasn’t fair to him so I just let him go and didn’t contact him for a week. During the week, he moved on. Like completely. Completely!

    I just realized how much it hurt not having him in the life and stopped everything that I had been doing that I should have done a long time ago. 6 months I fought for forgiveness and finally he decided to work with me when he came to US and decided to work us out. He said the L word and I asked him if it was for real and he said yes and that he was serious about the second chance. After all my efforts,winning him back was the best gift I could have ever been given. We spent weeks together after 1 year of long distance. But two months from that day, he just broke up with me. Reason being: He doesn’t feel anything for me. I went nuts. I cried, I screamed and you know, the normal dumpee reaction.

    Its been months and I didn’t know about the no contact rule, so I kept contacting him and he did the same until he just didn’t care enough to. My current situation is that I am still stuck back in time and after all that has happened, I still want him back. I cant really love anybody else. My emotional limit is that of a tiny bird. But after the terrible breakup and the misconduct in the months after the breakup, I feel there is no real chance of me with him. I really feel worthless. The worst part is I started it and I can never forgive myself for it.

  2. Millie

    March 9, 2019 at 10:49 pm

    Hello, I’m 20 and my ex is 20. me and my ex have been split up for a few days however we keep splitting up every few weeks! This must be the third time now. It’s so confusing because the day before we broke up he said he wanted to be with me forever, his reason for breaking up is lack of trust and he went on all my social media trying to catch me out then dumped me. What do I do to get him back?

  3. Anna

    January 3, 2019 at 8:28 pm

    Hello.
    Me and my ex were together for a year and a haf. One day I went out with my friends and got blackout drunk where I don’t remember a thing and was told I kissed one of my friends. I told my boyfriend straight away and he broke up with me a few days later saying he can’t have a relationship without trust. I begged for him to stay as we could try again it was just one mistake that I regret and promised I’d stop talking to the friend too but he was adamant about breaking up. We kept in touch for a few weeks and recently decided to go no contact as I still want him back and kept bringing it up. On that day we both said some hurtful things to each other then tried to finish on a high note when we decided to go no contact. I still love him and he says deep down he still loves me but kissed a girl 3 weeks after the breakup and says that maybe he likes her. I don’t know what to do as I still want him back.

    1. Chris Seiter

      January 3, 2019 at 11:07 pm

      Hi Anna…I think you would benefit by having a sensible action plan and that is what I specialize in with my Program. Feel free to take a deeper dive.

  4. Nic

    December 24, 2018 at 9:35 am

    Hi Chris!
    Ive been stuck as to what to do, we ended on some what bad terms, everything was fine. speaking about holidays, moving in together was best friends! it was abrupt and he left me over text! but he was still messaging me like we were together i kept bringing it up, tried to speak to him after it but he told me to move on, and he went cold and blocked me after we had some arguments (we never faught) Says he didnt know what he wanted, he still loved me, Says he didnt want to lose me but didn’t want to lead me on. We are long distance, been in no contact for 3 months. Its Christmas tomorrow, I was close with the family. Should i initiate contact?

    Thanks ,Nic x

    1. Chris Seiter

      December 24, 2018 at 10:27 pm

      Hi Nic!

      I am sorry your ex went so cold, then blocked you. He really doesn’t seem to know what he wants considering he says he loves you and does not want to lose you. Why treat someone like that if you love them. 90 days of NC is a long time. If you are following my Program, the two of you should be in the building communication phase. But if he is still unsure what he wants after all this time, then you may want to call for a meet up for a lay your cards on the table discussion as its unfair to you for this to drag out like this.

  5. Codi

    October 5, 2018 at 8:09 pm

    I’m 21 and my ex is 21 as well. We have been friends for 8 years and we dated for 4 years. 2016 hit us hard and it’s been rocky ever since. With, of course, good moments and love in between everything. In 2016, he came out to me as trans, female-male. I didn’t support it initially and that put a wall between us. He reached out to a “friend” for that emotional validation and I found the texts and it broke my heart. Trust was broken then and it’s been broken since. We were always a very strong, committed couple with a great bond. Truly Best friends. Anyway, fast forward past a few mistakes from me and February of this year was our 4 year anniversary. A month later I broke up with him. Biggest mistake of my life honestly. First time we’d ever broken up. I rebounded with a guy for 5 months. My ex and I still text everyday and hung out at least once a week. I said I didn’t think I was coming back and I didn’t “love” him anymore. All so untrue. All me being blinded. I came back in July of this year. We immediately clicked back into us and we were so thrilled to be back with each other. He left for a trip to Canada in August to visit that “friend” and I lost my shit. I said the most hateful things the entire week he was gone… to both of them. All out of pure anger. None of it I can take back. Horrible shit. He came back and said he wanted space and time. I clung so incredibly hard and apologized more than I could ever count. I clung so hard that I pushed him so far away. I couldn’t accept him leaving me. I couldn’t accept “space” I freaked out and ruined any chance I might of had. Today, I haven’t spoken to him in going on 5 days. Feels like an eternity. He wants nothing to do with me. He’s not “in love” anymore. He blocked me on absolutely everything. Things have gotten so ugly between us. I never in my life with him thought we would ever be where we are together. He just sees negativity and anger when he sees me. He doesn’t want to be with anyone else and I believe him. But I still worry he’ll find someone better and I’ll never have a chance to fix my mistakes. I want so badly to make him happy and to fix us. He doesn’t want any of that. He’s gone and I’m terrified he’ll never be back. What do I do besides keeping no contact and working on myself? Do I have any chance? Will be miss me? Will he reach out? We’ve always been so intimate, in love, close, and connected. We’ve never been this far away.

    1. Chris Seiter

      October 5, 2018 at 8:44 pm

      Hi Codi!

      Its common for us to hang on like crazy when someone we love is pushing us away. Yet, them having space is often the best medicine. So consider no contact and read up on how it works. I have posts, videos, and very comprehensive ebooks on how it all works and how to optimize your chances, while helping yourself recover!

  6. Stacy

    September 27, 2018 at 1:49 pm

    Hi I’m Stacy I’m 27 and my ex and I broke up a week ago
    We kept getting into fights and had a huge fight over the phone
    He broke up with me on the phone
    I said ok and hung up
    5 days passed by and he texted me saying he knows I’m goinh through a lot and what’s to be there for me
    I said thank you and that was it
    I got really drunk the next day and texted him if I could come over
    He said ya and things got heated
    I was crying hysterically and asking him why he didn’t want to be with me
    He wasn’t at all happy with me being intoxicated and aggressive with him
    He kicked me out and I started hitting him
    I ripped off a painting he had on the wall and left
    I apologized the next day and tried to redeem myself
    I begged for him to talk to me
    But he told me not to come near him or his house again
    I called him and texted him with no response
    I sent him one last text saying I’ll leave him alone and really sorry how things ended
    How do I get him back after that?
    This is the worst terms we have ever ended on
    And I’m afraid he’s really done with me this time

    1. Chris Seiter

      September 28, 2018 at 2:59 am

      Hi Stacy!

      So the post breakup period often looks like this with bruised feelings and the worst in us can come out. Best to create some space and implementing no contact is probably the best medicine for this relationship

  7. Asia

    March 8, 2018 at 7:27 pm

    My ex boyfriend broke up with me this week we fighted and we’ve decided to give it another try and then last night he said he will go back soon to his home country and dont like to continue anymore. I try to win him back, I beg but his answer is consitent its done as its not working out for the both of us we keep on fighting and arguing. We cant undertsand each orher side. Im willing to do the no contact rule as i need time for myself but im not sure if i will start it right now as his birthday is on march 14, 6 days to go. I have planned it long time but im not sure if showing up on his birthday will be a good idea as we fighted thru chat and he broke up with me thru chat he said he can do it and say it to me face to face as I wish and if ever we will meet his decision will not be changed. He’s always intiate break up everytime we had a fight he cant understand what i feel and if i explained i felt like im only talking to myself. I love him and i dont want to lose him. I dont know if i should greet him and give the gifts which i prepared for him or continue the NC rule. Please advise.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 11, 2018 at 5:11 pm

  8. Michelle

    February 5, 2018 at 11:11 pm

    Ok been with my ex 3 1/2 years have a beautiful daughter together and are due to move Home soon we broke up 4 weeks ago he went back to his mums things have been really bad and bitter between us I reached out to him the other day and asked for him back he totally refused do you think it’s to late for no contact to work on getting him back also really struggling with no contact as we have a child any advice would be greatly appreciated

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 8, 2018 at 11:56 am

  9. Tina Smith

    February 4, 2018 at 1:49 pm

    I met a guy and we instantly connected. We would be together and talk for hours, we shared the same values, had a strong mutual attraction , and instantly hit it off. We were short term dating for about 3 months. He had just ogtten out of a bad relationship and it was clear he was trying to date in order to get over it. He was in love with his ex during that time and even broke it off with me to gett back with her at one point. Once they didnt work out we rekindled but he grew distance and stated he didnt want to be in a relationship. We still dated and saw each other regularly. He had a lot of actions that I overlooked and forgave him for and we argued constantly about his lack of effort into dating. He wasnt keeping his word and constantly flaked on plans or did not comminicate. He direct messaged my friend on Instagram and then I blew up about it. I saw him out on a date with another girl and I lashed out at him and spoke to her about him as well. I think I blew up because I had a lot of things that were built up. Ultimately, I believe that his recent bad experience with his ex led to him growing distant towards me thinking that it would be draining like his last relationship. After the blow up he blocked me on everything except snapchat. I apologized a week ago saying that I shouldnt haveashed out and I was wrong for my actions. He saved the message, didnt respond, but ever since then he watches all my snaphat stories. Should I try to reach out again? Although we didnt work out I still think about him and truly believe that we could be something special

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 7, 2018 at 1:15 pm

  10. Pj

    February 2, 2018 at 7:03 am

    My ex and I broke up 6 weeks ago. We were together 3.5yrs. I always argued with him and he always had to be the one to apologise. He did a lot for me and I in turn also did heaps for him. However I had insecurities I projected upon him. The last 6 months I developed a chronic nerve pain in my ribs which meant I couldn’t move much or do anything and it resulted in hospital visits. It put a strain on our rslationship and I became constantly snappy at him. I realised all this after the break up. I initiated the break up and said I no longer felt the same. I let my pain cloud my judgement. I love him dearly and 2 weeks after I tried to get him back and he said he was set in stone and whats done was done. I gave him hell when we argued. I have spent a long time reflecting and commenced the gym and swimming and my rib pain has virtually disappeared since I got strict with myself and stopped depending on myself. I am meeting friends and even went on a date for some validation that I was a completely awful human being. I am hurting that I pushed away and mistreated the one person I love dearly. I know I could never ever do that to him again. We spoke today and he told me the same. He didnt feel like he could be in a relationship for a while. And he told me he had a lot on his plate and wanted to simply focus on himself for now. I angered him.and our interaction was bad because I asked if we could talk tonight on the phone. I feel I pushed him into a corner and he lashed out at me. So I simply apologised and haven’t said anything further.

    I have purchased the guidebook Chris offers. I read it and I am really struggling. Please. Help me. Guide me. I do not want to lose him. I am definitely working on myself but I realise what he did for me no one can ever replicate and I need to be the best version of myself and no one should enjoy the benefits of my.positive changes but him!

    A very lost soul,

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 7, 2018 at 12:12 pm

      Hi Pj,

      everybody should experience the best version of yourself.. right now, are you doing the nc rule? Are you continually improving yourself and posting in social media? And do at least 30 days of nc.

  11. Mar

    February 1, 2018 at 6:00 pm

    I am an outgoing 27 professional but I was pretty wild back in college (I had a drug problem intertwined with a toxic relationship), but I have since pulled myself together/settled down the last few years. Two years ago, I met and dated B, who had everything I could ever want in a partner and husband. We connected on all cylinders and he loved me for me, knowing everything about me. He is a farmer for his family (who I adored) about 2 hours away from me and he had a beautiful life, but was ready to settle down as hes a few years older. I also discovered I had a serious health problem a month into dating, and he was accepting and wanted to take care of me. Although I would have been very financially secure, at the time (25) I was not ready to settle down and didn’t have a “real” job with my own money, so it seemed that if I stayed with him I wouldn’t ever have to depend on myself and I would be moving from one nest to another. Therefore, always wondering “what if”- professionally and in love.
    To be perfectly honest, he wasn’t well-endowed I was worried about that being an issue later down the road. I mean I’m going to have children and I worried what if we aren’t sexually satisfied with each other? Anyways, I cheated on him with R who lives in my town and wasn’t aware of my long distance bf. Although no one found out, I of course felt guilty and clearly was not ready for a serious committed relationship that would lead to marriage. So to be fair I broke up with B (to him it seemed out of no where) only 6 months in, saying I needed time and space because I wasn’t happy with myself, and that it wasn’t fair to him. This absolutely shattered his heart as he said he had never felt this way about anyone. We met up about a month after breaking up for a drink to talk, and I explained to him that although I love him, I needed to work on myself first in order for us to ever work in the future. We kissed and I didn’t let it go further. I hoped we would run into each other (our favorite concerts, golf tournaments etc) but it never happened. I reached out saying can we meet up one day and he said yes but never finding an actual time. So I tried to move on.
    I spent the last year and a half working a great job, traveling, dating, making new friends and reconnecting with old. I completely cleared up my health issue and have all around been trying to enrich my life and self to reach my full potential. But I have thought about him every single day, if not all day, every day. I have been on plenty of dates and gone out of my way to give people a chance I wouldn’t have previously. I have even tried to be in a relationship (with R, we have no secrets and great sex but I don’t love him so I broke that off). I am not excited by anyone I meet, and also realize that I also have some baggage that my future husband has to be ok with. So I am still just obsessed with B, for the past year and a half. He watches my snap stories and likes my instagrams and I just cant let go. Nor do I want to. I know what I want in a partner in terms of backgrounds, friendship, attraction and I wont lower my standards but I am worried I wont ever find a perfect match that I loved as much as him, and instead I’ll be single forever or until I choose to be with someone for logical reasons.
    The worst part is, its hard to know he hasn’t found anyone else either and that hes so close and we are both just miserable separately. At least if he was dating someone I could know there isnt still a chance, but I am just torturing myself every day knowing that I had my perfect man and I was too childish to see it. I debate de-tagging myself from pictures because it looks like I am on date etc and I know he looks at my Social media but I want him to know that he is all I could ever want- even still. I understand he may never be able to love me since I broke his heart, and his family and friends probably hate me but is it possible? Can I reach out to him again? Or would it only be possible if we ran into each other organically? We both haven’t moved on (from what I can tell from cyber stalking and mutual friends) but he wont make an effort to see me/ talk even though I’ve reached out multiple times. I feel (know) he still loves me but pride is holding him back. Is it possible to get closure from this or will he always be the one who got away. Also, the fact that its been years and I am wiser and still constantly thinking about him worries me because what if this never ends? Of course I don’t want to look desperate or that I want him for the wrong reasons (money, loneliness, no one else accepting me) but I also don’t care about my pride if it shows how much I still love him. I am meditating, I’ve gone to therapy, I’ve planned a fabulous trip to South Africa coming up with my BFF- I do everything I can be to be pro active in my life and my thoughts but I am still so stuck.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 7, 2018 at 11:51 am

  12. Yolanda

    January 31, 2018 at 9:25 pm

    Tell me the details of your breakup. How long were you together before it happened?
    My ex and I were in a relationship for 8 years. I could feel myself slipping away. This wasn’t our first time breaking up. throughout the 8 years, we had broken up 3 times before. We always managed to get back together. this time it’s different. In September of 2017, I wasn’t feel the love anymore and after 8 years of being in a relationship with him, I wondered if he would ever marry me? I asked him the question and he kind of froze. He said he wants to make sure he is financially capable of supporting a family before he commits. I was feeling upset, because I didn’t know if this was an excuse or buying him time. The reason why this break up is different is because he is actually not talking to me. I seen him a few weeks ago at a restaurant and I went up to him and said Hi. He said, he didn’t want to see me anymore. If I see him in public no to acknowledge him and as far as he is concern the last 8 years never happened. He said he is trying to forget about me, doesn’t want to think about me and is moving on. of course, that broke my heart. At the time I ran into him, I think he was on a date with some lady. He was with someone and they seemed to be a little cozy. This is also different from our last break ups. During the last of our break ups, wasn’t with anyone and kept communication with me during our break ups. This time he completely shutting me out and he has also blocked me from facebook. I feel like I’ve lost him. In speaking with him that day at the restaurant, I could see he still loved me by the way he was looking at me and I understand I hurt him bad.

    What do you think the reason for it was?
    The reason why I broke up was because I wasn’t getting a commitment after 8 years. I couldn’t take it anymore. I’ve been very patient. I realized he is a great guy and has all of what I am looking for in a man.
    What have you done since the breakup?
    I’ve reached out to him a few times. He didn’t respond.

    What do you think your best course of action is?
    I don’t know at this point. I think I really screwed things up for myself. He’s seeing someone else now.

  13. Terri

    January 31, 2018 at 12:16 am

    Yes, we have, for a few weeks and he reached out first wanting to make it work but I was still stubborn. So after that, he only reached out to say Merry Christmas & Happy birthday (my birthday was the day after Christmas). I replied thanks. We did not reach out to each other for a couple of weeks and when we did, it was me telling him I hated him and so he ignored it. Two weeks later, I text again to apologize. He read it and didn’t reply.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 5:59 pm

      Ah, you have to avoid sending that kind of message again because it puts you in a bad light. It reminds him why he should stay broken up with you. I think you need to restart nc, and this time if he does reach out to make it work, you can break it.

  14. Stella

    January 30, 2018 at 6:48 pm

    My ex and I live together. We broke up a month ago. I was stressed at work and he wasn’t helping around the apartment, it caused me to stress even more. We got into a big fight when he didn’t help clean up after one of our dogs got super sick all over the apartment. I am implementing no contact and working on myself via therapy and medication. I am going out with friends and making new hobbies. He sits in his room on a computer and hasn’t told his family we broke up. Initially he was on tinder, now he is not. He is also posting videos from our vacation almost a year ago. How do I get him to see that this isn’t the right decision? I am willing to change but he said he doesn’t trust me to actually do it. Please help me get him back.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 5:37 pm

  15. Annie

    January 30, 2018 at 6:49 am

    So confusing, now it’s gone again!!!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 4:49 pm

      Hi Annie,
      when did you break up? You need to be active in doing posts that stay, not snapchat nor Facebook and Instagram stories. check this one:
      EBR 024: Using Social Media To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

  16. Annie

    January 30, 2018 at 3:55 am

    Agh and now I see it’s double posted! How embarrassing.

  17. Annie

    January 30, 2018 at 3:33 am

    Hi, I thought I had left a message yesterday but it seems to be gone =(

    – The breakup: we were together four months, and about to move in together. I think the cause was that amidst the stress of finding an apartment we argued a lot about money, and I (inadvertently) made him feel emasculated and inadequate, and like I was not listening to him.
    – Since the breakup: I did beg him to stay while he was breaking up with me, but I have not contacted him at all since them. I have watched his Snapchat stories, but no other social media interactions. He recently untagged the one photo on Facebook of the two of us (this hurt a lot), and I saw him on Tinder but no other apps (OKCupid nor Bumble).

    We have had zero contact since the breakup. To be honest I’ve been wallowing and nearly inconsolable.

    I’m unsure my best course of action. I know I need to improve myself so I’m not as jealous and controlling, and focus my energy on me. My question is how do I get him to see that when we’re not in contact.

  18. Nikita

    January 29, 2018 at 7:30 pm

    Hi,
    so basically I dated my boyfriend for 8 months. he is quite a very busy guy – he works 3 jobs (because he is going to do a loan) and recently he was offered a course from one of those jobs for just 4 weeks starting this january. anyway long story short, he used to break up for almost every argument we had which was mainly started by me arguing of how little we used to meet weekly. (p.s. minor arguments because he used to text me the following day or 2 of the argument).
    his working schedule is from Monday till Friday he works from 6am – 430pm (job 1) then by 6pm till approx. 10.30pm (job 2 – catering); then Saturday morning he used to spend like 4hrs job 3 and again Job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm till midnight or so and then, Sunday just job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm onwards. But of course he would not have the ‘energy’ to meet up with me on sunday evening because he has to go to the other job starting 6am on Monday – which I really did effort to be understanding.
    – N.B. We live very close to each other like maybe 20 minutes drive.

    So I felt quite pissed lately not finding time for me, although he used to tell me from the very first day that he is super busy and that he will not find time for me as much as he should to or as much as I deserve but somehow i still accepted. at the beginning of our relationship he was very sweet and caring and to be honest he still is, for instance once after a minor argument and talked about some issues he told me “you are too good to be lost” and also “whenever we meet i forget all of my problems encountered at work and throughout my life” ( which was back in December).
    (The issues and arguments are always about the fact that he has literally no time for me)
    The last argument we had was about the same issue which was how sad I feel sometimes that he doesn’t find time for me and his response was just like this: ” I think we should break up because you don’t deserve someone like me who doesn’t afford to find time for someone like you. probably it’s because you do not understand how busy my life is and i have no option in staying like this before i finish the loan payments for sure. So it would be best for you to find someone better because you seem to want more attention than i give you ”

    Well, i suggested that we should move in together rather than breaking up but he does not want to rush things out as he has never been in a ‘serious relationship’. So i thought he has already made up his mind in seriously breaking up with me this time and so i accepted the break up.
    After 2 days i texted him and it didn’t turn up to end well. I ended up insulting him and he pointed out that he is doing this for my own good.
    I currently in my final year of University and i have lots of pressure, stress and sometime some anger issues. My hormonal imbalance does not help a lot but he knows i have these issues.
    I know he never meant harm and i think he has feelings for me even though he told me once or twice that he loves me, but now i think either i annoyed him or that somehow over did it with these arguments. Some suggestions would be greatly appreciated

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 5:06 pm

      Hi Nikita,

      when did you broke up? Are you going to do the nc rule?

  19. Anne

    January 29, 2018 at 12:39 pm

    – We were together about four months, though were very intense during that time — talking for multiple hours every single day, talking about marriage, and planned to move in together. Just as we found a place (after a stressful process), he said it was too much money which led to an argument, and that led to him saying we’re too different and won’t work long term.

    – I think the reason was too much change all at once, and that I responded badly when he got stressed. I’d nag instead of comforting.

    – Since the breakup (12 days ago) I’ve been quite inconsolable, desperately thinking of any way to win him back (hence finding this site!)

    – Really unsure. Have had absolutely no contact since the breakup conversation. I suppose continuing NC, but then I’m unsure how to re-initiate contact and show him we can work through this.

  20. Louise

    January 28, 2018 at 11:39 pm

    My Ex and I were together for 9 yrs and broke up 4 months ago. We have been on and off a lot and more off than on the past year.The breakup happened during an arguement on the phone.We spoke the other day and he told me that he hadn’t called that night to break up that he had just wanted to talk about some things,however my reaction to his list of what I just saw as criticisms caused him to end things.Also during this conversation he told me that maybe I was just a nasty person and this really upset me.I have texted him almost consistently since we broke up which I know was a mistake.I just felt so bad about my reaction to that conversation 4 months ago sometimes he would answer but it was always negative.I text him saying that to hear him call me a nasty person was hurtful to me and that we have been together so long how could he truly think that.He replied that if I can’t accept what he says then he doesn’t think we can be in contact at all.I sent him back a message saying that I didn’t see how we could be in contact anyway even though I wanted to be.He hasn’t replied and I feel I have messed things up even more. Should I leave this now is never speaking to someone ever again,ever a good idea?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 1:47 am

      Hi Louise,

      You have spoken to him since you broke up, did it help? No, right?

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