What Are Your Chances of Getting Your ExBoyfriend Back

I Want My Ex Boyfriend Back But He Doesn’t Want Me

There is something that I want you to get used to if you want your ex boyfriend back.

Your ex boyfriend doesn’t want you…

Now, I know that may be a bit harsh but bear with me here.

Too often have I worked with people who have fallen victim to this rhetoric that starting off your ex boyfriend wants you back. While I assume there are some cases where this occurs I can tell you pretty confidently that in most cases this is extremely rare.

In fact, I find that most ex boyfriends won’t talk to you and claim that they are truly done with you.

But then why is it that close to 43% of them end up coming back after it’s all said and done?

Is it even possible to make your ex fall in love with you again?

Well, that’s what I am going to be exploring today with this article.

A Realistic View Of Your Chances And What That Means For You 

I find it’s always helpful to take a big picture view of things when you are dealing with a scenario as deeply complex as winning an ex back.

Now, you are reading this article because you want your ex boyfriend back and he has expressed some type of sentiment that he doesn’t want you back, right?

But how often will he change his mind about you?

For the longest time this was a burning question in my mind that I felt no one really had a great answer for.

Hell, I didn’t even have a great answer for it.

I mean, when a woman would come up to me and ask,

“Chris, what kind of chance do I have here?”

I would simply say,

“It depends…”

And it does depend but that answer isn’t good enough for you, is it?

No, you are looking for something exact.

So, one day I got this crazy idea.

What if I pooled all of my success stories and knowledge together to come up with a rough percentage of success. Of course, I found that my “rough percentage” was flawed in many ways because this was a sample of the people that I have worked with.

So, I decided to up the ante and ask a few of my relationship expert peers what kind of results they were seeing.

I also wanted to include data done by researchers so that I could come up with an aggregate percentage that was trustworthy.

So, what does all of this mumbo jumbo science talk mean for you?

Well, it means that according to my research, as a baseline, your chances check in around 43%.

Some may think that 43% is good and others may think it’s awful but you have to bear in mind. This 43% success rate is taken from a majority of people who haven’t followed the correct breakup protocol.

In other words, there is definite room for improvement on a 43% chance assuming you do the right things.

Oh, and I think perhaps it’s important to mention that the vast majority of the 43% of successes all had partners who didn’t want them back.

So, what is the secret?

How are they able to convince an ex who doesn’t want them to come back?

Changing His Mind About You, The Door To Door Salesman 

I can think of no better analogy to speak on your circumstance than the door to door salesman.

Think about it for a minute.

A door to door salesman is immediately greeted with contempt upon commencing on a sales pitch.

After all, no one likes another person spamming their life with sales pitches.

Right now, you are a door to door salesman and your ex literally wants nothing to do with you.

So, how do we change that?

Well, we need to convince him that you aren’t a door to door salesman. We have to do something to make him think the opposite.

Consider for a moment that two people are trying to sell you a product, for this articles sake lets just keep it simple and say it’s a vacuum.

So, who are the two people trying to sell you this illustrious vacuum?

  1. A door to door salesman
  2. Your best friend

The Contempt Of The Door To Door Salesman Pitch

Knock Knock….

(You answer the door…)

Hi mam,

My name is Ricky, your friendly neighborhood vacuum salesman. I wonder if I might have a moment of your day to discuss vacuums. It says here that….

(You slam the door in his face…)

It’s funny to me that people think that they are going to make sales this way.

Everything about the sleazy salesman approach turns people off.

The fact of the matter is that no one likes to feel taken advantage of or pushed too hard to buy something. In fact, when we do push someone too hard we end up pushing them away and therein lies the biggest flaw of the door to door salesman pitch.

It forces people to make a decision based on the recommendation of someone you have never met.

Now, lets compare this to an approach a best friend might take.

The Best Friend Sales Pitch

You have been BFF’s with Lisa since you were in grade school.

The two of you are two peas in a pod…

As thick as thieves…

Now, Lisa isn’t a saleswoman.

No, she is just your best friend and upon having you mention to her that your vacuum broke she decides to make a recommendation.

Hey,

You know what brand works for me? Shark! It’s great, I have had it for years and it’s the best vacuum I have ever owned.

She didn’t try to sell you a vacuum.

She simply told you about her experience owning one and recommended it to you.

So, you go out and buy it.

Putting It All Together

Now, am I saying that you have to become best friends with your ex in order to get him back.

No way!

All I am saying is that your approach needs to dramatically change.

Too often I see people approaching their exes like saleswomen.

You need to come back to me because (insert reason)

You were the best thing to ever happen to me and I was the best thing to ever happen to you.

Please come back… I am nothing without you

This is completely the wrong way to approach the situation. It’s not the right way to sell yourself.

What Is The Right Way To Sell Yourself

One of the most common questions you are probably wondering at this point is if there is any way that you can change his mind about you. Seeing as how it appears he doesn’t want you in his life anymore what can you possibly do?

Well, I thought I’d start by using a pretty fun analogy.

I’m a big fan of fan of Quentin Tarantino and even though it may not seem like it since I have been churning out quite a few articles for the past few week I have been quite sick.

Now, I’m the type of person that tries to turn “being sick” into a positive.

(Yes, I’m one of those.)

So, generally when I get sick I get a lot of free time outside of work and I use it doing all kinds of nerdy things.

I play video games,

I read books,

And I watch movies,

And it just so happened that I ended up watching about 5 tarantino movies while I was sick and I couldn’t help but connect with analogy that one of his characters said in one of his movies.

In the movie, Django Unchained, Dr. King Schultz and Django decide to partner up to rescue Django’s wife who is in the clutches of a slave owner but the problem is that they have no way of being invited onto this slave owners land.

That is when Dr. King Schultz comes up with a plan,

Imagine that a man is trying to buy a horse and he knocks on a farmers door and offers to buy the farmers horse.

What does the farmer say?

He says, no.

So… the man walks up to the farmer’s farm, he knocks on the farmer’s door and asks not to buy the horse, but the farm. And makes an offer so ridiculous, the farmer is forced to say yes.

Now, why do you think I connected to this analogy?

Well, it’s because it plays on the idea of human psychology. In my experience, human beings resist change with everything they have and make no mistake about it a man trying to buy another mans horse is a pretty big change.

So, in order to get past this initial roadblock you have to do something to make it worth it.

In this example it’s offering to buy the farm at a ridiculous price but lets distill this down and connect it to your circumstance.

Right now you want your ex boyfriend back but he doesn’t want you. Of course, you are trying to change that but change doesn’t come easy. What you are currently lacking is a ridiculous offer.

Crafting Your Ridiculous Offer

So, what have we established so far?

  • Your ex doesn’t want you but you want him…
  • That your ex is going to resist change with everything that he has…
  • And that in order to get him to embrace this change you need some kind of ridiculous offer to make it worth his while….

Now, the analogy above with the farmer deals with a monetary means. In other words, offering to buy something for an outrageous amount of money. But we are dealing with something far more difficult, human relationships.

What’s more is that often you’ll find every person has a different preference for what they like in relationships and this is where knowing your ex boyfriend comes into play.

Lets pretend that I am a woman and I am trying to get my ex boyfriend back and it is time for me to craft my ridiculous offer.

How would I go about crafting my ridiculous offer?

Well, the very first thing I would do is take out a piece of paper and start listing what I know my ex is attracted to.

  • I know he likes trucks
  • I know he is a fan of sci fi movies
  • I know he enjoys a girl who isn’t overly clingy
  • You get the idea

Basically I want a cheat sheet of what my ex is attracted to and then one by one I am going to go down that list and see how many of those things I like.

Wait… Wait… I see where you are going with this. I don’t like this one bit. I shouldn’t have to become someone I’m not just to get my ex back.

Do you want me to tell you how it is or do you want me to play into the politically correct society that we live in?

Look, I am going to quote from another of my favorite movies that perfectly encapsulates how I feel about this.

What really matters is what you like, not what you are like.

-High Fidelity-

In other words, assuming all things are equal the chances are high that a man is going to be more attracted to a woman who has all of his same interests than one who doesn’t.

Now, am I saying that you need to change your whole personality to appease some “man.”

No, that is not what I am saying at all.

Instead, what I am saying is that you need to add to your personality.

Maybe I wasn’t a fan of trucks but it isn’t going to hurt me to learn everything about them.

Maybe I’m not a fan of science fiction books or movies but it won’t hurt me to read and watch a few.

Do you get where I am going with this?

Essentially my ridiculous offer is becoming someone that my ex cannot pass up on.

Now, as for how you should show your ex this ridiculous offer. Well, I’d like you to explore this website or check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO to understand my process a bit better (I can’t give you everything for free.)

I’d Like To Test Your Ridiculous Offer

Maybe your ex boyfriend has moved on…

If not, maybe he’s not responding to you or texting you back.

Whatever your situation I want to assure you that me and my team are at your disposal and I am about to prove it.

I realize that crafting a “ridiculous offer” can be a little difficult and you might need a little help.

So, here is what I am prepared to do for you today.

Spend some time brainstorming what your ridiculous offer will be. Spend some time figuring out what you need to add to your personality and put it in the comments below.

After you do that we will get back to you with what we think and any adjustments you need to make.

Sound good?

	https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/chris-avatar.jpg	

Written by EBR Teamate

Chris Seiter

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73 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Boyfriend Back But He Doesn’t Want Me”

  1. Olga

    February 17, 2018 at 2:47 pm

    I think that my chances are at about 0%… Me and my ex were together for about 3 years, we broke up around 1-2 months ago. It was not our first break up. We broker up before, when I , out of anger threw him out of the house due to his lies. We had several month of seeing each other, on and off, before we moved in again. When that happened, he started studing, meet new people, startet going out more to the clubs and bar, while I was sitting at home waiting for him, for hours. I got jealos, insecure which caused fights. I was trying to expain my point of view and so did he, but we did not understand each other.
    The day we broke up, was the day when I passed a very important exam and wanted to celebrate with him, but he was at the bar eith his friends… and it was just too much for me.
    We bearly spoke duing those 1-2 months we are broken up, and when we did, it was mainly about the apartment. I do miss him and would try to work things out. He said he was not intered in it, shortly after we broke up. So after a month has passed, I asked him for help getting with teaching me how to fish (he loves fishing, I was never into it) claiming that I am going to participate in a fishing competition at work. At fisr he said yes, but when I texted him some days later asking when he would have the time, he told me that ” he has a new life, is not intersted in teaching me how to fish and that I should find someone else to do it “. I think that he can feel I want him back… and I DO, at least I want to try. IS there ahything else I can do and not seem desperate ??

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 19, 2018 at 5:01 pm

      Hi Olga,

      If you meant that was nc, restart it..do at least 45 days. Be active in improving yourself, in posting in social media and then continue doing that after nc while slowly building rapport through texts firt and then calls and then meet ups..

  2. Ella

    February 12, 2018 at 1:27 pm

    My ex and I broke up last Wednesday. We were together for almost 10 months. When he broke up with me he told me that he wanted to break up with because things were always going to be the same and we were always going to end up fighting. During our last month’s we fought alot cause we didn’t see each other much and he always went out with his friends. A week before he broke up with me I was actually the one who told him we should break up but then u told me that he didn’t want to lose me and that he loved me. Having heard that my hopes for our relationship rose again and I was happy. Then the week after he breaks up with me. I asked why and he said it would be difficult and that he’s not ready for a relationship. I begged him and cried he wouldn’t changed his mind. I asked him if there was someone else he liked, a couple of times he said no but after me annoying him a bit more he said yes. I know the girl and I know she’s not his type but he told me that he likea her alot. We talked on the phone last night and I asked him if he loved her. He said no but he really likes her. He told me he isn’t sure if she likes him back. I asked him if he still wanted to have sex and he said ok. I asked him if he still had feelings for me and he said yes but I don’t know if I should believe him since yesterday I stopped begging him ti get back together with him cause he threatened to block me. He was really mean when I was annoying him but when we talks on the phone he said sorry to me. He talked to me about her and I could hear in his voice that he really liked her. The way he talked about her. She’s younger than us…
    I told him that even though I still loved him I wanted him to be happy. And he said thanks. Then when we hung up he said goodnight and love you and I said love you too. I was going to start the No Contact rule today but i texted him telling him we needed to talk. He said ” I’ll let you know” . I wanted to tell him tonight that I couldnt be just friends or friends with benefits and that I still had feelings for him so it was best if we forgot each other for a while. Deep down o want to tell him thag cause im hoping he stops me from doing it but I know he won’t.
    What should I Do? I still love him and I want him back but I’m scared of I do the No contact rule he’s going to end up with her. I don’t want him to leave me for her or anyone else.PLEASE HELP.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 16, 2018 at 9:37 am

      Hi Ella

      If you dont, he’s still going to pursue her because he broke up with you for her..

  3. Ella

    February 12, 2018 at 1:17 pm

    My ex and I broke up last Wednesday. We were together for almost 10 months. When he broke up with me he told me that he wanted to break up with because things were always going to be the same and we were always going to end up fighting. During our last month’s we fought alot cause we didn’t see each other much and he always went out with his friends. A week before he broke up with me I was actually the one who told him we should break up but then u told me that he didn’t want to lose me and that he loved me. Having heard that my hopes for our relationship rose again and I was happy. Then the week after he breaks up with me. I asked why and he said it would be difficult and that he’s not ready for a relationship. I begged him and cried he wouldn’t changed his mind. I asked him if there was someone else he liked, a couple of times he said no but after me annoying him a bit more he said yes. I know the girl and I know she’s not his type but he told me that he likea her alot. We talked on the phone last night and I asked him if he loved her. He said no but he really likes her. He told me he isn’t sure if she likes him back. I asked him if he still wanted to have sex and he said ok. I asked him if he still had feelings for me and he said yes but I don’t know if I should believe him since yesterday I stopped begging him ti get back together with him cause he threatened to block me. He was really mean when I was annoying him but when we talks on the phone he said sorry to me. He talked to me about her and I could hear in his voice that he really liked her. The way he talked about her. She’s younger than us…
    I told him that even though I still loved him I wanted him to be happy. And he said thanks. Then when we hung up he said goodnight and love you and I said love you too. I was going to start the No Contact rule today but i texted him telling him we needed to talk. He said ” I’ll let you know” . I wanted to tell him tonight that I couldnt be just friends or friends with benefits and that I still had feelings for him so it was best if we forgot each other for a while. Deep down o want to tell him thag cause im hoping he stops me from doing it but I know he won’t.
    What should I Do? I still love him and I want him back but I’m scared of I do the No contact rule he’s going to end up with her. I don’t want him to leave me for her or anyone else.PLEASE HELP.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 16, 2018 at 9:34 am

      Hi Ella

      If you dont, he’s still going to pursue her because he broke up with you for her..

  4. Delaney

    February 12, 2018 at 1:38 am

    How do you build and present a ridiculous offer to someone who won’t speak to you?

    I dated a guy for 7 weeks – it was eerily fast and comfortable because we already did have the same outlook on life, interests, dreams, etc. I screwed it all up though because the speed that we became close triggered memories of my last relationship, with a man who contacted me months after I finally got away from him to tell me he’s a sociopath. It was very abusive. I lashed out at the new guy almost disassociating like he was the old guy. We stopped talking the first time for a few days but then I explained to him my past and he told me his (ex with a severe mental illness that he was abused too).

    Anyway after spending an amazing weekend together, he asked for space to think about if he wanted to continue on as we are long distance (but in constant contact, Skyping, etc and we were both willing and able to travel) and I freaked out on him again. It got nasty on my end – he remained a gentleman but eventually completely cut off contact.

    I spoke to him two days ago and he said he was wounded and needs space and for me to let him go for a while. I said i would do that but I also needed to be let go too if that’s what he wanted. He said he is too upset to say what he wants but if/when he decides he will reach out and apologized for not having a more clear answer.

    So I can’t speak to him at all, I have to wait for him to make contact, and he may never again. How do you do this then?

    We we’re so close and so perfect together, we both have so many odd similarities and we both felt like we’ve always known each other. But I screwed it up and I’ve never been so angry at myself. I’m focusing on working on these issues I realize are still here from my last relationship but it’s hard to accept that I can’t fix this, too. I miss him so much.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 15, 2018 at 6:25 pm

      Hi Delaney,

      He probably expects you to still initiate within the month. Don’t. Start the nc rule instead. Do at least 30 days. If he initiates in it, don’t reply. Initiate after 30 days. Be active in improving yourself and in posting in social media during and after nc.

  5. Alexa

    February 9, 2018 at 11:56 pm

    My ex & I have been with each other for 1 yr & 4 months. We broke up for constant misunderstanding each other. We last got in a huge argument where we both said horrible things. He gave me mixed signals about our future since we are still in high school. I didn’t want to be lead on to false hope so I approached him often to try to figure out if he truly meant after high school we would try again. &’ from there he would avoid me cold turkey so I approached him again and I got him to ” be honest ” he told me he didn’t want me in his life and that he didn’t love me. That we would never be togheter again. I got him to be friends but that didn’t last. I knew he didn’t want to be friends so I let him go , a week passes of me letting him go and he blocks me from the only social media I have and I’m not sure why he blocked me if I had not contacted him for 6 days. All I did was make my account public. Before he blocked me my friend told me he freaked out when I passed by and a girl was playing with his hair being flirty. I had thought to myself why he reacted that way if he made it clear that he didn’t want me.Today marks 15 days from the NC and he is back to being Cold turkey again with me and I am still blocked. High school will be over in 4 months and I feel that I am running out of time to get him back. I am in love and I am now a stable positive woman who is ready to take my ex back and built a healthy loving relationship. I don’t know how I can possibly get him back. I have been improving on myself since the NC purposes. I still have 2 of his family members on my social media who have not shut me out. Please help me.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 15, 2018 at 12:40 pm

      Hi Alexa,

      how much are you improving yourself? What new activities have you started? You can follow the advise on this one:
      EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

  6. Jade

    February 9, 2018 at 3:53 pm

    I was recently on your site and purchased the ex boyfriend recovery pro book and watched one of your webinars and I’d really like some support and guidance on how to get my ex back, it’s been about 2 months since we broke up and I feel I’ve tried everything with no success so I’m wondering if your method would still work after this long? We still have been in touch since we broke up because he wasn’t sure what he wanted and we tried to sort the problems that were causing some arguments but I couldn’t shift his decision. Up until last week he had been unsure but now it is a straight no. He said his mind has changed about us, he just doesn’t see us anymore, and is wanting to move on. He even went as far as saying he doesn’t miss what we had together. He won’t reach out and message me unless I do it first then stops talking mid conversation. I’m scared the no contact rule will not work and he will move on like he says he wants to during that time period. I desperately just want him back and us to be happy again. Could you help me out?

    Thanks
    (Was in a relationship for 18months)

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 12, 2018 at 11:30 pm

  7. Belle

    February 4, 2018 at 5:07 am

    I did the no contact for almost 60 days. he contacted me but after building rapport and hanging out I pressured him way too much to define the relationship and now he said he doesn’t want to try. He told me he loves me but he does not want to try. He wants me to be friends with him but I’m so in love with him I don’t want to be friends. I still want him back, should I just move on or try no contact again and start all over again? It feels like a second a major break up.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 7, 2018 at 1:09 pm

      slowly rebuild rapport instead of restarting nc.

  8. Mary

    January 27, 2018 at 8:26 am

    Knowing we don’t live in the same country anymore

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 30, 2018 at 11:22 pm

      Hi Mary,

      Yes, that’s a good idea.. What about other things? Tv shows, movies, food?

  9. Mary

    January 27, 2018 at 8:21 am

    My ex is a big handball fan, he’s been playing his whole life, most of his friends are from the club, he likes to watch matches… When we were together (10 months) I tried to get interested, watch matches on TV and matches of him or his friends. Now I really don’t think starting playing handball is a good strategy to get him back, isn’t it too obvious? Plus, I’m not sure he would like a woman who changes everything for him, or is exactly like him. What do you think?
    Maybe showing that I’m going out more, being more social, having more friends, still going on trips, practicing sports, maybe that is a good idea?

  10. Michele

    January 16, 2018 at 8:37 pm

    Me and my ex were together for 5 months. He is everything I want in a man but I was having trouble opening up to him. I had just gotten out of a 2 year relationship with a man who was NOT RIGHT for me. This affected me in the sense that I was scared to fully let someone in again. However, this my man was right for me and I should have. We had a lot of good times and no fights for the first 4 months but than I started showing some unattractive qualities towards the end.. and I pushed him away. He said we aren’t right for each other and that I will be happier in the long run as well. We had a friendly break up but I love him and deep down I think we are meant to be even though he doesn’t. We are very similar in every sense – we have the same values, interests, etc. I have broken NC and tried to get him back but he stuck with his reasoning. He does not want me back. It’s been almost a month since we broke up. I know he was very into me for a while but I feel like not opening up to him squashed the chance of an emotional connection . And I’m worried it may not be something I can get back.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 18, 2018 at 7:07 am

  11. Sasha

    January 15, 2018 at 3:49 am

    So I’m doing the no contact rule. Tomorrow will be 5 days. I’ve made every mistake in the book of trying to get my ex back. He does not want me back. That’s what he said, he left me for the girl he cheated with me on. He finds it hard to deal with issues and prefers the easy way out. This new girl is stroking his ego and I suppose he thinks a relationship with her will be more emotionally fulfilling to him. However, he’s my best friend and while my love is fading, I still want him to come back. I’ve deleted his number from my phone but my whatsapp profile pic and about me section is open to the public so that he can see what I’ve been up to. However, should I make it private again for the sake of making myself less accessible? Do I also delete him from Facebook? What should I do with regards to being accessible but not too accessible? I want him to miss me, and reach out to me soon.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 15, 2018 at 5:29 pm

      Hi Sasha

      He has to see your posts..so just let it be public.. Just dont comments back if he likes or comments in your post..

  12. Lily

    December 17, 2017 at 7:32 am

    Hello.
    My long distance boyfriend broke up with me around a month ago. The distance is not a problem, felt like I had to point that out.
    He broke up because he was tired of constant fights. Getting misunderstood and he’s also going through a rough time because of his stressful job.
    He said he wanted to be friends, I made it clear that if he doesn’t talk to me I won’t talk to him either and he has been initiating contact everyday. My doctor ( I went to one to help myself. Looks like I’m depressed and needed medication which I’m doing so I’m perfectly fine.) said I should talk to him about my issue. I did, he said he’s no longer upset about it and is happy that I’m finally taking care of myself. Said I should move on cause he doesn’t want a relationship with anyone for now and doesn’t know when he’ll be ready, said he needs time to recover.
    He says good morning and good night, he talks to me the most, still jokes around and laughs and tbh I play it cool. Don’t know if there’s any fee left in him or if I really do have a chance but I want him back. Because : 1. The relationship was perfectly fine if it wasn’t for my constant paranoia. 2. Nothing hurtful was said during the breakup and he says he still trusts me. 3. I’m sure I can fix things if he gives me a chance. ( I did beg him once.)
    Thing is, he’s going through a lot of pressure and stress due to his job. Only gets 3 hours of sleep and is pretty much in a bad place. Should I start no contact and ignore him? Wouldn’t that make things worse cause he already stated he has no feelings for me? Is there a way to get him back by being friends and helping him through all this? ( I once joked about friend zone and he said he’s not looking for relationships so there is no friend zone.) he also said IF we get back together he wants it to be a fresh start, I’m the most amazing person he has ever met but he just doesn’t want a relationship. I sadly can’t pay for the stuff on here cause my country can’t use PayPal or anything else…

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 20, 2017 at 6:56 pm

      Hi Lily,

      why not try the no contact rule first?

  13. Nastya

    December 5, 2017 at 11:57 pm

    Hello, Amor ! And thank you for your advice. It seems I did almost what you’ve recommended. I told him directly that we won’t be friends with him . He replied “Sure we can be only friends”. In fact , yes it’s really true that I prefer not to meet him at all rather than to be just a friend. But now I think maybe I said this ultimatum too fast. After No Contact we were texting already for a month. And last 10 days almost every day quite for a long. (*he is in the other country , we can’t meet just for coffee). Sometimes he wrote me first. But nothing emotional just like “How was your day”. But he used to complain a lot that he still didn’t believe me that I had been faithful with him. And ask if I’m single, and provoked me a lot , once I asked about him and he replied that he already dated with women after breakup. I went into hysterics that time and literally confessed him about my feelings. But he told that it’s not true , and that he didn’t date anybody , just wanted to check my reaction. And there were several situations when he provoked me and I “justified myself ” that I really never ever cheated him, and now is still single. I did this because I thought that maybe really his trust can bring back our relationships. But now it’s obviously he just checked me for …pleasure? And in fact when he started to tease me that he is free, just “waiting for his love” I told him my ultimatum . And he told that he didn’t understand what I mean. And again I showed so much emotions and loads of text while explaining. And he told that, no, friends only. But finally I kind of said “Good bye”. And I really wanted. But I feel so much pain. That I’m thinking about other NC rule. And maybe I will try to text him friendly for some time till I create intrigue and interest? maybe I was just not patient and showed more affection, was very open with that person and that ultimatum was totally inopportune? Is it good idea to pretend a month later that I already don’t care if he is still single or not, and just talked friendly? Cause I think it can sting him a lot .
    Also one thing worry me. And I would like to know your opinion about it. This guy told me the phrase ” Sure one day I will find my love”. At that time when he knew about my feelings. And it didn’t look like that he teased me because of anger. Cause when he is angry it looks not like this. Later after my ultimatum messages he told ” what I say wrong ? ” . So it seems for me like he did it absolutely not caring about my feelings. I can’t say such thing for any person if I know that he loves me, even if I don’t . Do you think my ex is not normal, cruel? Or men in general less sensitive and its kind of normal for a man?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 8, 2017 at 6:30 pm

      if you said goodbye, you have to at least mean it.. pretending to be friends right after you said it, means you didn’t mean what you said..

  14. Nastya

    December 4, 2017 at 1:10 pm

    Hello!
    I had long distance relationships since last summer. At the beggining he lot of affaction, but sometimes was clingy and over controling. I don’t know if his jealosy was the main problem or the result of other problem. But it was the main reason of our scandals by phone, when I all the time justified myself while he told literally :” I don’t believe you. You slept with someone esle”. When in one of your articles you mentioned that you shoudn’t go back to the person who behaive abusive. I thought if it’s this case?.. . I wasn’t going to flirt with other guys or even look at them. Also the family of my ex didn’t see me but they already didn’t want me. And it seems that it’s because he loved me very much that time. In their culture women can’t tell directly to a son or husband their opinion but as far as I understand they use manipulation. And if a son in the family attached to his girlfriend or wife maybe women in the family can consider that thier relative can go out of their control in such case. But it’s just my suggestion. So at some moment he started to behaive impudent with me. Ignored. Blocked his phone. Didn’t say directly. I literraly begged him to explain me what is going on. Then I was traumatised and didn’t contact him at all . And he initiated communication again. Second time he broke up already when I was in his country , but also not telling directly , just it seems for me that if I didn’t make scandals asking him to explain he would disappear without telling a word. He told me that I understood him wrong, that he didn’t feel anything, that it was me who “forsed” him to have sex, and that he didn’t date with other women except me this year just because he didn’t have such opportunity. It was terrible and rediculous at the same time cause sure he had such opportunity… And after that break up I texted him a lot till he stopped reply. Then I did No Contact with more that 30 days and followed most of your advices. In general I think that Rapport was created during texting phase. And even if he behaived indifferent sometimes in the dialog he wrote me every day at least like “good night” or ” good morning”. But he started jealosy talks again. But at the same time repeated that he was free and I were free. And he wanted to visit my country not because of me just for vacation. But recently he lost his money because of bets, and he isn’t going to travel anymore. And I sent him couple of job vacancies in other contries that are suitable for his qualification, and some variants of student exchage programs. But he told he didn’t open that links cause he don’t want to go out of his country. And the same day later he told : ” Now I don’t have any love here, but sure one day I’ll find it’. And it was the point for me. I wrote him a lot of rude things. And understood that I can’t arleady make a step toward this man if he stay the same ignorant and indifferent. But after my rude messages he wrote me as usual “hi, how are you” absolutely ignoring what I had written to him. Now I think if there is slight probability that he understood why I stopped reply him?..And if there is any sense in continuing of this dialog? But I’m exausted and can’t talk to a man who is “waiting for his love”. I thought that maybe if I’ll write him kind of ultimatum “Deside if we are together ot not. There is no in the middle” will it change something?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 5, 2017 at 7:21 pm

      Hi Nastya,

      he’s like that because he thinks you’re just saying what you’re saying but don’t really mean them.. In short, you’ll take him back once he starts being nice with you again. Make your actions speak what your standards really are..

  15. Jamie

    November 29, 2017 at 9:18 pm

    Hey. My boyfriend broke up with me two days ago after being completely fine in our relationship. I’m his first girlfriend at age 27 and we dated for 3 months of euphoria in which he mentioned several times on how He thought I was the one. The day before he was even talking about us starting a business together. He says he knows he loved me a week, a month and even the day before but when he saw me Monday he felt nothing for me, even though nothing changed/happened. When I dropped off his things yesterday, he mentioned that he wants to try again but doesn’t want to hurt me again in case he can’t feel for me again, so he doesn’t want to continue on in our relationship. I’m heartbroken. I haven’t contacted him since I returned his things. Should I move on?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 30, 2017 at 8:00 pm

      Hi Jamie,

      Try the no contact rule and the advice above first.. If it doesn’t work, continue moving on…

  16. Denise

    November 28, 2017 at 4:13 pm

    It’s been about 7 weeks since my ex of 2+ years broke up with me. We had hit a rough patch and were arguing for about a month. No major issues, (ex. infidelity, family problems, financial issues) but we just got on each others nerves. He decided he wanted a “break” for a month, we took it. Although I thought it was a terrible idea. We didn’t see other people spoke about every 3-4 days. A month later he breaks up with me for good. Literally said, “I’m not changing my mind, I still love you but no longer see a future with you” I was shocked and thought we were going to work through it. We didn’t speak for a week after that. Then I texted- it was friendly, small talk. We seem to catch up about once every week-10 days. I initiate every time which I hate but I have NEVER begged or pleaded for him back since that dreadful day he dumped me. Last week we spoke on the phone for the first time. I was happy, cheerful, NO DRAMA, no real mention of “us” at all in fact! he too was friendly, engaging in conversation and it flowed nicely. It was a very good convo, I’d say. However, I feel like I’m holding out for a miracle or something, should I just move on? I still love him and miss him every single day.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 29, 2017 at 2:33 pm

      Hi Denise,

      For me, yes, you should..

  17. Brandee

    November 28, 2017 at 9:22 am

    My ex and I split about 2 years ago, but it was never truly over, until 3 months ago. We share a daughter, were very , have tons in common, and get along great for the most part. He now has come to the conclusion that he is destined to be single and wants us to be friends. I need to add that his mother despises me for reasons unknown. I’m hanging on by less than a thread…..

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 29, 2017 at 2:08 pm

  18. Jennifer

    November 26, 2017 at 5:13 pm

    My ex broke up with me around three months ago stating that he didn’t want to be with me because he’s not interested in relationships. He said that it wasn’t me, but him. Honestly, I think he broke up with me because he wanted to prioritize school and the gym with his classmates. Three weeks ago, I texted him with something interesting to grab his attention. He ignored it. Yesterday, I texted him asking if we could grab coffee and meet up. He said no. I asked if he broke up with me because he lost interested in me or he just lost interested in relationships? He said he just lost interested in relationships. Initially, I thought he wanted to break up with me because he was interested in another girl, but his best friends and family told me that wasn’t the case. He gave them the same reason that he just wasn’t wanting a relationship. What should I do? Is my situation hopeless?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 28, 2017 at 2:08 am

      Hi Jennifer,

      those were wrong kind of texts because you don’t have rapport yet.. how much did you improve and how active were you in posting during nc?

  19. Jennifer

    November 26, 2017 at 5:11 pm

    My ex broke up with me around three months ago stating that he didn’t want to be with me because he’s not interested in relationships. He said that it wasn’t me, but him. Honestly, I think he broke up with me because he wanted to prioritize school (he’s in an accelerated one year program) and the gym with his classmates. Three weeks ago, I texted him with something interesting to grab his attention. He ignored it. Yesterday, I texted him asking if we could grab coffee and meet up to discuss closure. He said no. I asked if he broke up with me because he lost interested in me or he just lost interested in relationships? He said he just lost interested in relationships. Initially, I thought he wanted to break up with me because he was interested in another girl, but his best friends and family told me that it wasn’t the case. He gave them the same reason that he just wasn’t wanting a relationship. What should I do? Is my situation hopeless? It’s been basically three months since the break up. I did NC for over 40 days.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 28, 2017 at 2:08 am

      Hi Jennifer,

      those were wrong kind of texts because you don’t have rapport yet.. how much did you improve and how active were you in posting during nc?

  20. Selene

    November 25, 2017 at 3:27 am

    Hello, my name’s Selene and I have a problem, I hurt my ex husband really bad, with words or fights, we decided I should come back to my parents house, because I have a mental disorder and want to get treated, the thing is that happened almost 3 months ago, and he used to send me messages saying he did love me and missed me, and that he really wanted me back, that was on September, but I started to fight that he never sended me messages or call, the thing is that even about a month ago we applied the no contact rule and he sended me a message asking how was the doctors appointment, I just answer and he said ok that’s good and that was all, but the fights after that keep happening until he said he couldn’t take it anymore and said he wanted the divorce, of course I beg him to stay but said I was a fighter and he’s better without me, I gave him sometime but everytime we talk we fight because he says he’s ready to move on, and it’s desperate to find someome, 2 weeks ago I talked to him and everything was real good, we have much im common so I talked to him about the walking dead (lol), everything was good he told me about his feelings and that he really wanted to be alone and I said it was fine, later he came back and fight with me, but I kept calm and told him I was hurt because he was feeling bad, he said sorry, and said that he did regret what he did, I told him I loved him and he said wanna hear it back even when we might not be back and I say I don’t care I just say what I feel, and he said I can’t stay mad at you I love you and care about you, and I left the conversation, he didn’t wanted me but I did, the next day I come back and he acts all cold like nothing happened, I told him he was weird, then we ended of fighting because he said he felt cold and then fine, long story short, I talked to him yesterday, he said he cares about me but not as a lover, he says he doesn’t think much about me going back or anything and that he’s getting old and if he finds someone he won’t miss a chance, I told him that I was gonna go get the medicine and get treated and that I’m gonna give him time and give time to myself to get better and then if we decide to go back good if not oh well, but that I would apply the no contact rule (because he won’t change and I can’t make him) he said I don’t understand how much he doesn’t trust me and that I never changed, but I don’t have an option but to wait, he said; I told him my idea again and said if you say no then I won’t even bother because nothing by force, he said yeah I think it’s ok, but then answer him and ask for some stuff I need and he leave me on seen on messenger, the thing is, he doesn’t answer messages anymore right away, he doesn’t contact me, he’s never changed about leaving and he always says he wants to find a better girl fast because he’s getting old, in other words he’s showing symptoms of moving on, and I don’t know if l my idea was right and what are my chances of having him back if just talking to him makes his blood boil, and if by not talking I’m giving him more chances of forgetting about me, I would appreciate you could answer me, thank you very much, : )

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 27, 2017 at 8:15 am

  21. Nisha

    November 24, 2017 at 3:38 pm

    Hi Kris,
    I have a male bestie. But I love him so much. Even he likes me so much. We have even went for dates. We have once slept together tooo. I am from India. I have proposed him. But he has not proposed me. I can understnad he loves me with his actions. But he is not ready to accept it. How can I make him express his love. I wish to marry him. How to make him express his feelings. Both will be happy if we marry each other. Please help me.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 5:12 pm

      Hi Nisha,

      If you slept with him, that means you’re friends with benefits. Check this one:
      EBR 006: How To Turn Friends With Benefits Into A Relationship

  22. Raquel Vega

    November 24, 2017 at 2:50 pm

    It’s been a month since we broke up, it was a ldr. A few months ago, I got into a depression, so I was not able to give him back the love he was giving me, he also got a a new job that left him stressed and our communication decreased abruptly. So, adding those things up, i get why he was not feeling happy in our relationship anymore. When he broke up with me, he told me I take this time to focus on myself, not relationships and try to figure out my issues. In my desperation I asked if he thought we could get back together (silly me) he said that he doesn’t know what is gonna happen in the future but he is not giving hopes. We texted “I hope you are alright, good luck with work” each other at least twice. A few days ago, I made the mistake to tell him i was not alright and that i miss him terribly (silly me again). I am aware that no contact is the best for us for now, and me so i can regain my happiness.
    We are so good when we are together physically, our connection is really beautiful, but when we are apart, my every day life consumes me entirely (its mostly work that makes me feel like that, I kinda feel burnout, but i’m quitting in 3 weeks) and that makes me put him in second place, and be not so loving.
    When i feel bad, i write down how i am feeling and that is helping me so far. My plan is to send him this sorta journal i have made, showing this sorta “evolution of emotions” where first i am desperate and later i show how i accept that what we became is better off left in the past. Plus, i’m sending him a couple videos of the good times we had when we were together, so he remembers that.
    In this month, he has deleted our pictures on his instagram and deactivated his facebook account. I stopped stalking him now, but its hurtuful to see how he apparently “moved on”. I know he is doing this for us, but on the other hand, how can he do that when we had plans of moving in together and i was “the love of his life”?
    ps: what do you think of my package idea? im gonna make no contact til i send it (30 december)

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 5:10 pm

      Hi Raquel,

      Don’t send those.. It looks like chasing.. Just be active in posting your activities.. . Make it look like you’re moving on without putting in the caption that you are moving on.. Because if you really are, you’re not going to say that.. Especially saying it to him directly.. You will look like you’re trying to convince him.. If you really changed, you’re just active in your activities and you wouldn’t explain or show anything to him..

  23. Farah

    November 24, 2017 at 2:48 pm

    Hi Chris!

    My ex and I have been together for 5 years and have broken up for 3years and have gotten back for a year and now we’ve broken up again. I’ve tried the NC rules for 60 days, After the NC I’ve reached out to him and he responded politely. Just recently I invited him to talk in person for a “closure” and he agreed, the conversation was too emotional but sincere he even teased me if there would be a 3rd chance for us. On my birthday he greeted me and said he had a hard time deciding if he would greet me or not, I also told him if we could try it again and I promised to work on the things that irritates him but he rejected my proposal and told me to just move forward. Help! Do we still have a chance??? Does he hate me??? What to do??

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 5:05 pm

      How much did you improve during and after nc and how long have you been building rapport when you asked?

  24. Linda

    November 24, 2017 at 1:42 pm

    Hi Chris,

    My ex and I have been together for 8yrs but in between that 8years was a 3 yrs break up where he had other relationships and just last year we got back together again but broken up just recently. I’ve tried the NC for 60days and sent him a message after, he responded to my message and just last week I invited him to talk things where we left off and he agreed. I can tell by his gesture that he still has feelings, he even teases me of another chance of being together, the conversation was painful but sincere. He greeted me on my birthday yesterday and I asked him if we can try it one more time but he rejected my offer. Do we still have the chance of getting back? Help!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 4:58 pm

      Hi Linda,

      How much did you improve during and after nc and how long have you been building rapport when you asked?

  25. Chahinez

    November 24, 2017 at 8:33 am

    Hey chris .so i have been.with this this guy for 10 months .2 months as a couple then he started changing then he told me.that he loves me but he cant see that we are great for each other .i told him that deep down we are alike etc and i do genuinly believe that we are for each other and that he is the one for me but he cant understand that .so i tried with him a lot and then and i gave up when he started ignoring me and i sent him a msg that i was fed up and i unfriended him from facebook. Now i dont know what to do so i can change his mind because he was in love with he just was borred or somthing and stopped caring for what will happen with us .so what should i do? should i start the no contact rule and if he doesnt reach me . Sorry for my bad english cuz it is not.my mother tongue .thank u in advance

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 3:00 pm

      Hi Chahinez
      You can do nc..he doesn’t have to contact in it.. And if he does, you have to ignore him… After nc you can initiate

  26. Janine

    November 22, 2017 at 12:48 am

    Hello. Ive been from an LDR for more than 2 years now. We havent met yet, but I am supposed to go meet him next year after i accomplish all my requirements for working abroad.
    One time, he was driving (he’s a truck driver), he got annoyed by my texting. I was only leaving messages, Ive done this before and he just usually ignores me till his shift comes to an end when he can read them. But that day, he got so mad and sent me a video of him telling me to stop, he is driving. He was yelling like a madman. It was my first time to see him like that. I was so scared and mad. So i texted hus bff, whom he introduced just recently, and i told her about it. (And no, they arent romantically involved with each other. Theyre childhood pals.) It came to a point when i told her, “yelling is next to beating. Thats how it always goes”. Now i know what i said was wrong. She replied, “he isnt a woman beater”. And then blocked me, then told my bf about it. He got so so angry and he said the meanest things. He said he will never ever touch a woman like that and we are over for that reason alone. He said he doesnt want me anymore coz if i love him, i wouldnt be able to say those words. They both blocked me. This is by far, the angriest he has ever been at me. And this is the worst out of all breakups we had.

    And after a week, he unblocked me. I was able to communicate with him and tried to defend myself. He got so mad and logged out of his social media accounts. Another week passed, he logged into his messenger and saw my pending messages, we got into an arguement again. But this time i said sorry and that i want him back. He said i will never clear my name and that i wont get him back ever. He ignored all my messages from then on. He never bothered readind any and just deleted them without checking them out. 3 days later, it was his bday. I greeted him and after a day, he read it. 4 days later, i texted him. He didnt read my messages despite being active. I sent more messages and now he logged out again. Oh and he also didnt block me now he got a chance. Plus he didnt cleared our nicknames in the chat. His is hunnycakes. Mine is babygirl.

    What do i do about this? Help me. I want him back, i cant just live with so much regret.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 3:27 am

      Hi Janine,

      He doesn’t respect you.. Personally I don’t want you to get back with him because it’s an emotionally abusive relationship.m

  27. Melissa

    November 21, 2017 at 8:24 pm

    Hi!
    Ive done 2 weeks no contact and then i talked to him, begging and asking what went wrong… he blocked me two days after because i had annoyed him, but he said he wouldnt when we talked… then i did no contact again. he did unblock me and we started talking and i was a bit hard to get and he started texting first but, he never tries to get me back or anything. he is just texting me but it is really as friends and i can tell he doesnt try anything with me.. I dont want to be strung along.. we broke up before and he always said he missed me and fought for me back but now he doesnt… what can i do to get out of this friendzone.. i agreed to meet up as friends but he is hesitant.. What should i do?… I really want to meet up because i think i will have a better chance.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 24, 2017 at 2:56 am

      Hi Melissa,

      send a clean slate text.. tell him being friends is not workable for you right now, thank him for everything and then restart nc.. do at least 30 days..

  28. R

    November 21, 2017 at 4:21 am

    I love your website Chris. I think I have read most of the articles. I have come across a situation where I believe my ex put his sister up to texting me to see how I am doing, basically I feel as though he used her to check up on me. Can you write an article about an ex using a mutual friend to contact you? What should someone say to the mutual friend and what does it mean if the ex does this?
    Thanks!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 23, 2017 at 1:14 am

      Hi R,

      When and why did you break up?

  29. kpkpl

    November 20, 2017 at 3:58 pm

    Hi Chris,
    My ex-boyfriend’s reason for breaking up with me was that he doesn’t love me and never did. We knew each other for 10 months and were a couple for around 7 so it was enough time to fall in love. Will any of this work if he has never loved me? You don’t talk about love so much on your site and wanted to know what you thought. It makes sense that you could win someone back who once loved you but I’m not sure about my situation. I’d like to think he must have loved me a bit for how serious & intense our relationship was, but maybe I’m delusional.
    Thanks for all you do
    Kx

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 22, 2017 at 2:46 am

      Hi Kpkpl,

      It’s not a guarantee to work in any situation but it helps increase your chnaces…
      Check this one:
      If He Tells You That He Never Loved You Then Do This…

  30. Alex

    November 20, 2017 at 9:49 am

    I was very active in my posting And he always liked my Instagram photos.I started eating helathy And going to The gym And also i returned to art (i Lost it during relationship).Actually we were both invited to our Good friend party in different city (so we And other friends were sleeping in The same place) At first he was kinda avoiding me but after he was Nice And i felt like everything was normal.(OH And i was wearing Red a lot,looked really amazing ,smiling a lot And looking him into The eyes as The site says)When i felt sick i Heard that he was worried about me And actually he texted me (started conversation) three times yesterday And today again.He is Nice And more intrested.Its a Good sign right?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 22, 2017 at 12:50 am

      yes, that’s a good sign.. You need to initiate texts too just be the one to end it at high point.

  31. Jessica George

    November 18, 2017 at 3:49 am

    Hi Amor.
    My boyfriend cheated on my with my best friend. My best friend has no feelings for him but he claims to have feelings for her. And strictly told me he has no feelings for me and he don’t want me anymore. Everytime I initiate a conversation, he replied coldly. He doesn’t call or text me. The moment he told he likes my best friend, he told me that he needed some time but I was hasty and created a massive problem which made me lose my best friend and my boyfriend. I feel after the problem I created, he has hatred on me and developed deeper feelings for her. However they have both stopped contacting. And I’ve trying all I can to win him back because I still love him so much. But all he does is think about her and not me. What should I do to win him back Amor. Pls help. Thanks.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 20, 2017 at 4:17 am

  32. P.o

    November 18, 2017 at 3:27 am

    We have been together for 5 years, since high school. I’m dealing with depression and he felt he could not work it out with me because of it so he broke up with me. I took it hard and almost killed myself because he was everything that made me happy amidst my illness. We still talked after the breakup because he thought staying friends was going to be okay. But we tripped a few times and slept together and still spent time together like how we were before, only without the ‘I love you’s. Had a lot of breakdowns that affected some parts of my life. At some point I got tired and begged for him back. And he drew a line and told me he really didn’t want me. Some days after I found out he likes another woman and is already dating her and he feels trapped with me still clinging to him. So he met me in person and broke everything off. And I spiraled down deep into depression and I have no idea if the tactics here will help me get him back. I grew up with him and I still believe we have what it takes to make it.

    But I’m really hopeless right now. Should I just stop?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 20, 2017 at 4:13 am

      Hi P.O,

      It would be better if you move on to put yourself first because you shouldn’t be in a relationship unless you’re independently whole.. You have to get a personal therapist to help you where to start..

  33. Ankita Srivastava

    November 17, 2017 at 4:32 pm

    My boyfriend broke up with me last week. We were together for almost 8 years and we were like family. I was being very clingy and emotional from past one year. He got attracted to another girl at his workplace. Now he says he doesn’t feel for me. But I know that’s not true because he talks to me when I call him, I am not blocked n he says he still cares. I want him back. He is my home. Please help.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 18, 2017 at 2:47 am

  34. Antoneta

    November 15, 2017 at 8:34 pm

    Hello,my problem is that I chase my ex-boyfriend.We don`t talk anymore.
    I know…I realized that it is a turn off for them.

    So my question is…How to correct this mistake and rekindle attraction ?

    i hope you will see this 🙂

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 18, 2017 at 2:13 am

  35. W

    November 15, 2017 at 8:48 am

    Hi Amor. I’ve thought of a few ridiculous offer. Does all these even counted as one ?
    1. Getting an ear piercing ( he once always persuade me to get my ear piercing because he said it’s nice when girls have ear piercing )
    2. Get my hair dyed ( he once asked me to get my hair dyed but because i couldnt dye my hair at that moment due to my parents permission and now i finally could ), ( should i use it as a topic after my nc when i start contacting him abt what color does he think it’s better or should i just get it done before nc and just appear with a new me infront of him after nc ? )
    3. He likes girls who bakes ? ( idk but he mentioned to me before that his ex bakes for him at times and asked me why i dont bake )
    4. He likes girls who gives him his own space and own time?
    5. He always mentioned that im skinny af with just bones and his family too mentioned to me all the time , so what can i do abt this ? Im always skinny since young and i hardly grow meat .
    6. He likes surprises , he’s not very into surprises that kind but who doesnt love surprises and effort , no ?
    7. He mentioned to me he doesnt like the way i talk , he said he told me before but i dont really rmb , all i rmb was once he praised me and say that im pretty and i amswered him ‘ofcourse im pretty’ , but im just joking. He then tell me after that that he thinks im over confidence. Idk is it this tbh. How can i change the way i talk ? Hmm i dont even know what and where to start to change ?
    8. He likes playing games . Guys like playing games, no ? ( i always tried to learn to play games but i dint really went into it and learn, should i )
    9. He likes sports , he likes playing dodgeball .

    So i think this is almost abt all . What adjustment can i make ? Any of these that i could implement during the nc and post it on social media to show him that im actually changing into a new me ?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 17, 2017 at 7:45 pm

      If you can skip a month of training, then good.. but if that’s something that doesn’t help you personally in your life, then don’t sacrifice it just for a guy.. Improve yourself, your skills, your health and your relationships with friends and family, for yourself. Not for him.. Do what helps you grow as a person..

  36. Alex

    November 14, 2017 at 7:51 pm

    Hi Amor!
    I told you my story i different comment but in short he broke up with me 1,5 month ago,i did The nc for 30 days And week ago i texted him And he replied. We texted from time to time,And he initiated two times,but he isn’t always engaged in conversation even If he texted me.I think my messages bored him And i have to came with something better.Also i Want to point out that he wasnt sure If he wants to break up (but did) and he hasnt contacted me during my nc but now he is replying always.Could he still be confiused/not sure?If yes,what does it mean?Thats why he wants to talk but not Want at The same time?He is cery careful but nice-neutral.
    Sorry for being chaotic!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 18, 2017 at 1:39 am

      HI Alex,

      how much did you improve and how active were you in posting during and after nc? He’s probably still confused.

  37. Kris

    November 14, 2017 at 6:27 pm

    He likes the Tampa Bay Rays, poker, space stuff, craft beers, walking dead(we watched together but i dont think he has cable to watch it now), NCIS, M*A*S*H, tombstone and rounders…. help please

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 18, 2017 at 1:37 am