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261 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Boyfriend Back But He Doesn’t Want Me”

  1. Avatar

    Stacey

    April 27, 2020 at 7:35 am

    Hi. Me and my boyfriend had been together 9 and a half years, he dumped me 4 weeks ago as he didn’t love me anymore. Won’t speak to me about it at all, he’s blocked my number. He had moved on to someone he met 3 weeks ago at work (we work together,I will soon be his boss). I have tried no contact and then failed as I found out he had lied about seeing this girl. He is 34 I am 32. The new girl is 25 and the complete opposite to me. I am struggling with how you. Can throw 9 and a half years away for no solid reason and then move on so quickly. He should’ve been proposing this week on my birthday (apparently), and we would’ve moved out this year as we have both just signed new contracts for nights to finally get moved on together. I don’t understand any of it. Please help x

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      May 2, 2020 at 1:18 pm

      Hi Stacey, it sounds as if your ex is having a grass is greener situation, this is tough as you work together you are going to have to remain porfessional in work and then follow a limited no contact, where you only speak with him in work about work and nothing else. He has most likely blocked you as he is at the moment in the “honeymoon” phase of his relationship with the new woman. The best thing for you to do is work on your Holy Trinity through your no contact which needs to be 45 days. Then you need to start following the being there method – all this information is on this website and in Chris’ videos on YouTube too

  2. Avatar

    Joan

    April 16, 2020 at 3:04 pm

    Hi, me and my boyfriend were together for a couple of weeks but we decided to end it because none of us could help each other. I have borderline personality disorder which makes it hard for me to stay in relationships, but this one hit differently. It was a long distant relationship, but we’d call 11h+ in one day and we’d always be there for each other whenever we had problems. The only problem was the fact that he thought that it was mentally exhausting like a therapist session. Is it possible to him back? We’ve broken up for a couple of days now.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 20, 2020 at 1:33 pm

      Hi Joan, it is possible as your relationship was so short that it didnt have that much time to be a good or bad relationship. What you may find is that you need to complete a 21 day NC before your ex is ready to talk to you again

  3. Avatar

    Sof

    April 14, 2020 at 12:58 pm

    hi, so me and my boyfriend were together for about a year and it was honestly by far I can say the best year of my life. He made me feel like the best part of myself. I’ve never connected with anyone else as much as I’ve connected with him. While we we’re together I met a guy that was fun to be around and I enjoyed his company. I became good friends with and he kissed me and I didn’t stop it from happeningSince then I’ve felt nothing but guilt and regret for doing it so I told my boyfriend that we kissed and he forgave me. Things were good for a little while until he started partying with his friends a lot and not spending as much time with me to the point where I asked the big question. If he even wanted to be with me anymore and if I made him happy. He said he wasn’t even sure anymore. Before I had been a huge liar about stupid thongs that I knew were dumb to lie about so I started making these changes to myself to I could be better for him, no for us. We broke up in October of 2019. Let me tell you that these couple of months have stripped me down entirely and have made me feel a type of sadness I’ve never felt before. Losing him made me feel like I lost the most important person I’ve ever had. He cares for me, he loves me. I know he does. He tells me he doesn’t want a relationship right now and I totally get that he needs that space. But eventually I want to do everything in my being to make things right. To gain his trust back. I know reading this it’s like it’s just a boy but, I’ve convinced myself that this guy is my soulmate. He makes me the happiest ever and I want to be with him. We don’t talk all that much but we’re ok good terms. The last time we talked it was about me wanting to eventually be with him and him saying that I had lost him and that’s just how life is. He tells me he loves me and he misses me still. That he thinks about me sometimes and our memories. I just want to know what I have to do to make this happen again and if there’s a chance that we will be back together. Also if you can tell me with the information I gave how he possibly feels about it.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 23, 2020 at 5:38 pm

      Hey Sof, it sounds as if he lost trust in you even though he said he forgave you it does not mean he forgot what happened with your friend. I would suggest that you go into a 45 day NC and do not break it if you want your ex to wonder whats going on with you. Stay away from posting anything with another guy for sometime as you do not want him to assume you jump from guy to guy as you cheated you need him to feel that you are not the type who can move on that easily. You need to reach out in the texting phase after 45 days having positive short conversations about his interests. You end conversations first and build up their length slowly getting him investing in talking to you. This process can take time, but if he is enjoying his single life at the moment do not mention relationship or settling down when speaking with him

  4. Avatar

    Brianna

    April 9, 2020 at 7:54 pm

    Hi,

    My relationship was fantastic.. except when we had little arguments because we were unsure if the other person loves the other one. I lived with him. When the fights didn’t get resolved he would result to asking me “are we breaking up” and my ego would pack my things. To the point I did leave one day. He bought my boxes. I love him so much.. I uprooted my entire life to move across the country for him. Now he thinks I am the problem and I’m his soulmate but he doesn’t want us anymore. He said “he’s ok with me gone”

    I’m dying. If we could see eye to eye during a silly argument we wouldn’t be here. I can’t do NC because he said he’s going to help me find a place but I feel like dying.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 11, 2020 at 11:09 pm

      Hi Briana, you need to follow a limited no contact

  5. Avatar

    Nicole Mitchell

    April 4, 2020 at 4:28 pm

    A few weeks ago my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. I was planning on moving to the same city as him in a few weeks. We started dating when we were 18 and honestly had the best relationship. We were so close, got along great but we did bicker from time to time about stupid stuff. His reasons were “i’m not ready for the next step” “I need to focus on myself” “I can’t give you the commitment that you want” “i don’t think were meant to be” and “Im not focusing on getting back together right now i’m just focusing on myself”. He keeps saying that this was the hardest thing he had to do because he does love and miss me greatly but he says this is the best thing for us and you can’t change my mind. Since the breakup I have been an absolute wreck. We haven’t talked in about a week and i’m going crazy. I know its probably best if I don’t reach out and do the “no contact” and give him the time and space that he needs to figure things out. He keeps saying that the doors are never shut and anything can happen. Do you have any opinion or advice that you can give me? Like should I take this as a permanent breakup or will he eventually come back to me? I really wanna get back together with him but I honestly don’t know if that will ever happen.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 9, 2020 at 11:16 pm

      Hi Nicole, focusing on yourself for the time being and completing a NC is key if you want him to come back to you. While he is out there “focusing on himself” you need to be working on yourself, the Holy Trinity and showing him what he has missed out on by being the best version of yourself using social media to show you are doing just fine without him in your life right now. It is key that you do not watch his social media while you are doing NC as it can delay your healing process

  6. Avatar

    Bell

    April 4, 2020 at 3:52 pm

    Hi! I was in a non commited relationship with a guy for 2 months, he told me he didn’t want a relationship. When I told him I missed him after not meeting for roughly 2 weeks, he said he liked being with me but didn’t feel the same way. I freaked out a bit and sent him a crying voice message which made him mad and said he feels trapped. That day we talked over the phone and agreed to forget about this, he even apologized as did I. For a few days we talked as we did before but then suddenly he stopped reaching out. I asked him if we were okay, when he replied that he doesnt understood the question, cuz he already said that he feels good in his life right now. Then I replied that I meant if he wanted to talk/meet cuz we didn’t talk much in the last few days. It took one day for him to read the message and one more to reply with I’m sorry I was busy with family and friends, now I have a lot of time to be at home and spend time with them. I just texted a hi. I know it’s a long story, but my question is if I have a chance to get him back. To prove that I don’t want to trap him or be clingy, I just want to go back to as we were before.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 9, 2020 at 10:51 pm

      Hi Bell, the issue with these friends with benefits relationships is someone always ends up getting attached and then getting hurt. So I would suggest that you decide what you want first, if you are happy with friends with benefits understand that it is going to be just that, nothing more. As he stated he did not want it to be more. If you want a relationship with emotional connection etc, then you need to follow the program starting with a NC and then texting phase where you get your ex investing time in talking to you, phone calls, spending time together without getting intimate and increasing the romantic level in your meet ups until you are in a relationship

  7. Avatar

    Valerie

    April 1, 2020 at 5:27 pm

    Hello,

    My ex and I were together for 2 years. We met online and did long distance for 1.5 years until we moved to the same city. He broke up with me in a text after a fight 2 weeks ago when he was having a really bad day. But the next day he wrote to me again told me he was not going to change his mind. He said he still has feelings for me but he thinks it’s the best because I’m too dependant on him and we fight all the time and don’t solve anything. I begged him to take me back and said that we haven’t tried to fix things properly but he still refused, and said it will never work with us although I mean a lot to him. I unfollowed him and blocked him everywhere, except his phone number. Currently we are in quarantine in different countries. I did no contact for 10 days but 3 days ago I was mislead by his mother who told me he still loved me and that i needed to talk to him. He was nice at first but then he started ignoring me and I was confused and started telling him that I thought we should try again and then he told me to respect his decision. I have been texting him a bit these past 3 days, sometimes he answers and sometimes he doesn’t, but he’s not exactly warm. I don’t know what to do. I just want him back. If I do no contact for 30 days, im scared his feelings will be gone, and also I wouldnt be able to say happy birthday.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 9, 2020 at 9:06 pm

      Hi Valerie, if you want to follow this program then I suggest that you do follow the No Contact rules. It is essential part in getting your ex back, and as for the birthday message. It is better to have him wondering why you didnt and get him to think about you, than you message you and have him ignore you

  8. Avatar

    Shelly

    March 29, 2020 at 3:46 am

    Hi, my boyfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago after being together for 6 months. We ended up fighting ally in the last two months because he wasn’t showing any interest. He also said he lost attraction for me and would often compare me to other girls he sees. He also said that he doesn’t feel the same way anymore. I was clingy before and would text him a lot but after the breakup I realized this was unhealthy and I’ve been trying to change. I really miss him, especially after one week of NC. We set a two week period of NC and we’ll go from there. He doesn’t seem miserable at all. I’m at a loss as to what I should do.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 29, 2020 at 9:36 pm

      Hi Shelly NC should be 30 days so that you can have time apart plus you do not want to have an agreed amount of time that you do not speak so that he realises that you are not chasing him

  9. Avatar

    M

    March 25, 2020 at 2:42 am

    Hello,

    My boyfriend and I dated for 6 months. I was emotionally unstable at around month 4 due to triggers from last relationships. My ex has had very bad past relationships which have left him with confused feelings and a hurt ego. I have now been diagnosed with boarderline personality disorder. It has been 3 months since our break and I have completed the 30 day NC today. I am happy without him and I do not depend on him to be the best I can be or for my happiness. However, I would still like him in my life as I am now on medication and have sought the help I need. He told me he did not want a relationship yet has kissed me since the break (before no contact). He was the one who suggested NC. Now that I have competed NC, I do not know what to do. I want to reach out, yet I worry that because of him suggesting NC my agency would decrease by me reaching out to him. I have worked on being the UG and have taken good care of myself. I don’t know if I should reach out now or later.

    Any info you can provide will be of help,

    Thanks.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 29, 2020 at 11:29 pm

      Hi M, when you have been in a 30 day No Contact you can then move on to the texting phase. Good for you taking good care of yourself, and keep doing the Ungettable work going forward while you work up the value ladder

  10. Avatar

    Sophie

    March 24, 2020 at 5:12 am

    Hi

    My boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago, and since then I’ve done everything wrong. I’ve attempted no contact repeatedly but never gotten further than a week, I’ve been clingy, and I’ve pushed him away further and further. We had an argument yesterday, resulting in him blocking me on twitter and removing me as a friend on discord. He said he couldn’t trust me, that I was irresponsible and unpredictable, and that he didn’t love me anymore. I apologised and said that I respect that he doesn’t want me in his life anymore, and we left things there. I’m now going to do no contact, but after my repeated failures, and after pushing him away so much, is there even a chance that he’ll ever want me back? I feel like I may have made the situation broken beyond repair.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 31, 2020 at 1:20 am

      Hi Sophie, there is a chance but you are going to have to learn to be patient and understand that this process is going to take time. I would focus on your Holy Trinity and make sure you are learning to control your emotions so you do not reach out to him, and that you know what not to act impulsively within this program.

  11. Avatar

    Rose

    March 21, 2020 at 10:54 am

    Hi,
    I just broke up with the guy I’ve been dating for 1.5 years. We were doing long distance, only 3 hours but we both had very full lives so didn’t get to see each other often. It was great right up until the last month when he started to pull away. He became very distant, we were barely getting to talk and when we did I always seemed to be the one initiating conversations. He also stopped being affectionate and sweet over text, turns out this was because he was having doubts. He initiated the break up because it wasn’t working as he just didn’t have the time or energy to commit to a relationship. He was so busy with work and uni and family committments that he barely got anytime to himself so I ended up feeling like a chore as all he wanted to do was rest and recharge. He just had too much on his plate and had to prioritise these other more important things in his life, to which I was supportive and understanding of. I didn’t want it to end so tried coming up with ways we could do things to make it easier on him but in the end he was right and it was cleaner to just end things and I saw it would also give me the best chance of getting him back rather than letting things get messy and complicated between us. He gave me the option of being friends or cutting it clean, he wanted to just cut things off but left the decision to me in case it made it easier for me remaining friends. We were both sad but I guess it ended as well as it could. Just before we broke up I found myself in a position where I was closer to him so would be able to make the effort to see him more, I was so excited as I thought our relationship could finally progress. He said that even that wouldn’t make things better, he just didn’t want to be in any relationship fullstop as he would constantly worry that he wasn’t giving enough and he doesn’t want anything extra on his plate right now. I told him I want to try things again when he’s ready but he said he doesn’t think he sees a future. I think he was just being careful and trying not to get my hopes up as he said he didn’t want to do that and he also didn’t want me to wait around. He reminisced over a few things we shared and it really made it feel like this was it for him but then I also know he still has feelings for me. I really think things could work between us and I really want him in my life. We ended on I’d let him know if I wanted to keep talking just as friends or not at all, since then I’ve started no contact. I just worry that this program won’t work for me as he doesn’t want a relationship at all and the fact that we ended on good terms. What should I do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 29, 2020 at 11:44 am

      Hi Rose, the program can definitely work for you as long as you follow advice and apply it to yourself so that you can show your ex what he is missing. Someone who does not want to be in a relationship is talking about the NOW. One thing is certain in our lives and that is change, he is going to eventually want to be in a relationship again and if you are working on yourself in that time to be “Ungettable” he is going to want to be with someone like you because you are the best person he is going to have in his life and no one else is going to compare to you

  12. Avatar

    Galena Vasileva

    March 17, 2020 at 9:57 pm

    Hi,
    We were together for 2 years, living together all this time. It was going absolutely great. My ex recently broke up with me. Just 5 days ago and i am still struggling to find out if he might want something again or not. He has been texting ocasionally to see how i am doing or about our flat as we need to move out now. For a long time, he was going through some personal stuff and he never felt like doing anything not only with me. Because of that i tried fixing everything with good and bad. The last few weeks he had been fighting because i was so annoyed that he didnt put the effort even if i told him something was bothering me. Lately, he was all the time with his phone or watching TV. Procrastinating and avoiding every problem that came our way (including problems in his personal life, because of those problems he got into a kind of depression and lost himself) He stopped putting effort mainly emotionally. We had an incredible connection and love before. When we were breaking up he told me he loves me more than anything, but he is not in love in the same way and because of that he doesnt feel like putting the effort and he doesnt want me to be miserable. He told me he needed some space and time so i gave him a week when i was out of our flat. When i came back he told me that for now he wants to be alone but he Is quite confused and is not sure about it. We are both devastated, as we were absolutely sure we were going to grow old together. I am currently packing my stuff from the flat, as we have put our 2 months notice… it is possible to get back together even if we actually sell the flat? I have done nothing obsessive or desperate after the break up. Gave him proper space and still doing it. Following everything i read online, including after finishing packing tomorrow, will try no contact for a month. He is very stubborn, though.. and he was always afraid of change.. so the fact that he seems kind of sure about this worries me. I know we are meant to be together, i am just not sure how to remind him that…i was always giving and doing everything for him, including that when he couldnt give his 50% i gave a bit more from myself. I have given him the world, but the nagging (that was really necesaary to get him out of his comfort zone) i think pushed him away. Or maybe i am just blaming myself at this point, as it doesnt make sense for me. We have almost everything in common… we were like married already.. i feel like tgiving him space and no contact will make him realize he is really losing me (as i have always been there despite all the bad stuff, i think he thought i would never leave, and i was a bit clingy sometimes, always explaining myself talking or texting, but never in an possessive or obsessive way)….we were closer between each other than with our families…. even though we got along perfect with both families, as we live abroad and were alone in the UK, we qere each other’s rock and support…

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 29, 2020 at 10:01 pm

      Hi Galena, it is a difficult time for you and I can imagine more so if your family live in a different country. Give your ex some space and allow him to miss you. Work on your Holy Trinity and focus on yourself for sometime. While I understand many people like to try and fix things for their partner, you need to remember that he is an adult and needs to do things for himself, including improving his mental health and his life. You can not mother him, that is when the “love” changes for you

  13. Avatar

    Jaqueline

    March 16, 2020 at 8:53 pm

    Hey there,
    I have been acting like a real emotional drain with my boyfriend of 1 year and 9 months. The past few months I’ve been really needy and clingy but in an unattractive way and am sure that I came off as controlling as well. Not really sure what I am going through, but it’s been coming out as projections onto people around me and unfortunately he was one of those people.
    We have a long-distance relationship although his parents live five minutes up the road and he’s only 2.5 hours away. We would go maybe a week or two without seeing each other max.
    I would get into this pattern where I got needy/clingy every time we’d be apart for a while and it just, as he said, “steadily got worse.”
    Well, he broke up with me last week and is telling me he doesn’t feel the same anymore and he thinks it’s for the best.
    I’m just curious because I want to make it work and Know that we can, I at least now that I can be different – what should I do?
    We’ve texted back and forth a bit since then and yesterday is when he sent me the
    “I don’t feel the same way anymore” text….
    I haven’t responded.
    Thanks

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 18, 2020 at 3:16 am

      Hey Jaqueline you need to start with a no contact and make sure that you work on yourself in that time. And then reach out with a text that Chris suggests to get conversation started again where you re attraction your ex and work up the value chain

  14. Avatar

    Lisa

    March 11, 2020 at 3:29 pm

    Hi 🙂 not sure if my previous comment posted. I don’t see it so long story short. My bf and I live together. Our relationship used to be fun loving exciting and filled with respect trust etc.. sure we had disagreements but nowhere like we are now. He broke my trust (porn use he was addicted) after that I felt HORRIBLE about myself it took away trust it made me insecure it caused so much issues.. we have fought for months because of how it’s made me feel and at first he begged to fight through this he craved us being together etc. but with each fight he withdrew more and more and more. It’s been two months since I’ve heard “I love you” he claims he’s not in love with me anymore and doesn’t want this relationship anymore. I asked him what’s one thing he hates about me and us (relationship) and it was “the fighting/conflicts that’s it” he’s told me before that w every fight he cares less and loses interest and he feels he’s gotten to his point of no return. We’ve still been fighting. Hasn’t been a week of no fighting yet. However I feel I am now healing from the pain so I don’t think fighting would be happening as much as it did, and I know as I get better it wouldn’t be a factor (fighting) can he get his feelings back is there a good chance when the fighting stops (since the only reason he doesn’t want me or us anymore is due to the fighting?) and what can I do to show him the chance and pull him back in?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 18, 2020 at 3:30 am

      Hey Lisa, so you need to start with a No contact and give you both some time apart some space form the negative emotions you’ve been carrying and the words that were said. After the NC is complete you can then reach out with a friend text to try and rebuild your connection

  15. Avatar

    Lacy

    March 11, 2020 at 3:20 pm

    My boyfriend and I live together, trust was abused several months back and I struggled getting past it he was willing to fight for us knowing he messed up (not physical cheating) but porn that he lied about. He claims he’s past it and hasn’t done it for almost 3 months now.. however we fought about every other day for months since trust was broken. Before trust was broken we had fun we were happy unbelievably loving. He wanted to make this work so much but he said with every fight he withdrew more and now he doesn’t want me. I asked him what he didn’t like about me + the relationship and he said just the fighting. Now he’s not in love with me and he’s not interested in the relationship and it’s strictly because the fighting hasn’t stopped. I am now moving past the pain and getting over it but I don’t know if it’s too late for him to get his feelings back and want us as much as he did before the constant fighting. Can it happen? And what should I do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 12, 2020 at 2:04 pm

      Hi Lacy yes it can happen but it does mean you have to complete a No Contact and work on your emotional control so that if you do speak in the future you make sure that you do not argue or bicker at all in the future. It takes a short amount of time for those negative memories to fade and before you know it, you can reach out with a text that Chris suggest and start showing your ex that you are more positive and less argumentative than you were the first time around

  16. Avatar

    Savanna

    March 10, 2020 at 12:39 pm

    Hi,
    Me and my ex broke up just about a week ago he said he didn’t wanna be with me anymore but then he said that he just needs time. so I said alright come back in a few weeks and tell me how you feel. but he’s texting me saying he needed his belongings back that I have and I told him I thought you were gonna tell me how you feel in a few weeks and he reply’s to me saying “my feelings won’t change” then at the end of that convo he says “just give me time to gain my patience back” and I’m so confused does he wanna be with me or not he’s breaking me down then giving me a little hope and i don’t know what to do.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 18, 2020 at 12:22 am

      Hi Savanna, so if you want your ex back you need to make your ex think that you are moving on. They know they can have you back if they wanted you this gives them power to move on without thinking about you. Complete a no contact where you spend some time working on yourself, posting ungettable posts and showing him you are living life and being social with your friends. Maybe some subtle hints that you could be dating someone to make your ex worry that you are moving on

  17. Avatar

    Amelia

    March 9, 2020 at 8:28 am

    Hi,
    My ex and I were together for about 7 months. We were going well. So I thought.
    School had just started back as we are both in college and the pressure was starting to mount. He is in a town band and has that as well as school.
    He said that he didn’t love me as much as he used to and that he couldn’t be with me romantically anymore.
    He said that I message too much when he has things he needs to do and that I am so persistent in everything.
    The day we broke up I cried in his arms for at least 45 minutes during lunch break. He said he was sorry, about a billion times. I couldn’t understand why he didn’t want to be with me anymore if he still had feelings for me.
    I know that he has a busy life and I wanted to support him in his choice to move onto uni.

    I tried the begging and crying and everything. It has just turned him away.
    We still talk but it just isn’t the same.
    Bland and not heartfelt.

    What should I do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 12, 2020 at 11:35 pm

      Hi Amelia, so you need to start a No Contact now where you are not getting in touch with your ex 45 days Work on your emotional control and make sure that you understand the process fully before you start reaching out to your ex again

  18. Avatar

    Jayla

    March 7, 2020 at 5:17 am

    Me and my ex dated for 4 years and people always got in my head about him like that he didn’t deserve me and all that.One day I found out another girl kissed him…I was furious even though from what I understand it wasn’t his fault.I ended up breaking up with him last year after I found out, I felt fine until just recently.Now someone else likes me but now I feel like I’m missing my ex and can only see myself with him.I have been feeling this way for a few weeks now.Im not sure if my ex still has feeling for me but I’m not so sure what I should do to find out.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 9, 2020 at 9:59 pm

      Hi Jayla you are able to reach out to your ex and see what sort of response you get from him when you do. And see where the conversation goes from there. You can also casual date for the time being with the new guy to see if you like him better

  19. Avatar

    Caitcecelia

    March 5, 2020 at 3:23 am

    I recently broke up with my boyfriend, our relationship was good for a while, but he struggled to show any affection and Only put in effort when he felt like it which became an issue, we held on and tried to fix things for a while but ended up ending things. I was a very supportive girlfriend and never pushed or put any pressure on him. he suffers a lot with bad mental health and told me that having me around helped but has now decided he’s so much happier and that this is “the happiest he’s felt in a while” and he doesn’t think our relationship was good for him. I know that this is temporary and I’m worried he’s just going to suffer in silence. I still love him and care very much and want him to come back but I don’t know how to get him back when he’s acting so cold

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 17, 2020 at 11:31 pm

      Hey C so if he is struggling with things mentally then being alone could make him feel better in managing his emotions as he does not need to consider anyone else in his decisions. If you want your ex back then go into a No contact and reach out after 30 days but make sure you are trying to have friendly conversations with your ex, do not get emotional, do not appear to be wanting him back.

  20. Avatar

    Sharma

    March 3, 2020 at 7:50 pm

    Me and my ex recently broke.. thecreason was I lied to him about something which had a valid reason..but he didnt trust me..I told him truth one day at that he felt like I cheated him.i assured him that I didnt mean to lie but I did just because I had reasons.. I gave him every proof..I tried my best to make him understand to believe me that I was not wrong.but he didnt even listen me for once nor he trusted my all proofs.nd he said he would have forgiven me if I would just asked for a sorry .though I ask for it several times but he didn’t notice .he is stuck up on his decision that he dont want to be with me.. I tried it he still didnt understand and said he dont want me….
    He said he still replies to my text so that i have no topic left and then I should not text him anymore..
    Is it over chris?what should i do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 10, 2020 at 11:04 pm

      Hi Sharma, as you cheated you need to read the articles about how to rebuild that trust and understand that you need to complete a 30 day no contact where you then focus on yourself for that time and give your ex some space to get over the fact that you cheated. Read as many articles that you can that apply to your situation so that you understand how ERP process works

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