How does the old adage go?
When emotions run high, logic runs low
Today we are going to be diving into a highly emotional topic and talk about some of the things that you could be doing to make your ex mad or annoyed with you.
Now, if you know anything about the way I typically write articles then you’d know that I like to go above and beyond.
I research everything I write about to make sure it’s backed up by my own personal findings and any scientific research I can get my hands on.
I’ve found five very interesting things you can do to pi** your ex off and that’s what we are going to be talking about today.
What Are The Things That Will Make Your Ex Annoyed Or Angry?
As I just stated, there are five things I’ve found that can make your ex pretty annoyed with you.
- Permanently Never Talking To Them Again
- Trying To Force Things Too Much
- Telling Them That You Don’t Want To Break Up All The Time
- Not Accepting Their Decision To End The Relationship
- Talking Too Much About The Past Relationship
Today we are going to be picking apart what each of these means and I’ll even share some real life stories of people who’ve committed these “sins.”
Are you ready to rock?
Thing #1: Permanently Never Talking To Them Again
I believe the cool kids call this “ghosting.”
Now, here’s the interesting thing.
Basically the no contact rule directs people to ignore their ex for a certain period of time.
My team and I have found that three time frames seem to be ideal,
- 21 days
- 30 days
- 45 days
But here’s the key to the no contact rule.
After that “time frame” has been completed you always get back in touch with your ex.
What can end up making an ex mad is if you just fall in love with your time during the no contact rule and decide to never talk to him or her again.
This is completely fine if you aren’t trying to win your ex back but if you set out with the intentions of actually trying to win an ex back this might not be the best approach.
Thing #2: Trying To Force Things Too Much
You’ll often hear me going on about the fact that two things really need to occur for you to successfully get your ex back.
- You need to position yourself properly
- The timing needs to be absolutely perfect
Technically you can do everything right.
You can listen to my advice and implement it but if your ex just isn’t in a space where he or she is going to be willing to take you back it’s probably not going to happen.
Conversely, your ex could be in the right frame of mind to take you back but if you haven’t done anything to position yourself properly you can just kiss your chances goodbye.
Here’s my point.
Trying to get an ex back isn’t something you can force
It takes time.
And a little luck.
Yet, every day I run into people who try to force the process. They literally try to fit a square peg into a round hole,
Thing #3: Telling Your Ex That You Don’t Want To Break Up All Of The Time
I’m a huge fan of Game of Thrones and I happened to be watching an episode last night and something struck me as really interesting.
***Spoilers For Season 7 Of Game Of Thrones To Follow***
In the series you have a master manipulator named Littlefinger.
This guy literally manipulates everything he can get his hands on but in season 7 that changes.
He gets found out by the Starks and the move to execute him.
It’s fascinating to watch someone get the tables turned on them where in the moment they go from confident, to unsure, to defense to literally getting on their hands and knees and begging for their life,
Of course, it doesn’t work and he gets his throat slit.
To me, this is the equivalent of someone who constantly tells their ex that they are not ok with the decision to end the relationship.
I understand the line of thinking.
They think that if they tell their ex that they don’t want to break up the ex will change their decision.
But it probably won’t.
Thing #4: Not Accepting Their Decision To Break Up
This is the perfect thing to talk about here because it’s closely related to what we just talked about.
I think we can all agree on two things.
Someone who doesn’t accept reality is looked at as crazy.
Or they are in the matrix,
Every once in a while I’ll coach someone and make it clear to them that I only have a certain amount of time available to dedicate to their situation. After all, there are literally hundreds of people begging to be coached by me.
When I tell someone this they nod their head in agreement as if they understood.
However, once I finish my initial coaching session they grow frustrated or angry with me when I don’t respond to them right away.
Again, I’ll reiterate that I’m not meaning to ignore them.
I’m just very busy.
(For the record, I do usually get around to responding to them eventually just not on their time table.)
Of course, by that time, after I’ve explained why I’m not able to respond as quickly as they’d like, they are angry with me.
This in turn makes me mad and a little annoyed.
It upsets me because it’s a clear indication that someone is not able to accept reality after they agreed that they would accept it.
How do you think your ex feels if you are doing the same thing to them.
After every day you do or say something that undermines their decision to break up with you?
There is nothing more unattractive than someone who can’t handle defeat with grace
And make no mistake about it, being broken up with is one of the worst defeats a human can suffer.
If you don’t believe me read this.
People who tend to do best at getting their exes back are the people that accept their fate easily and almost effortlessly.
I understand that it’s difficult but it’s not impossible.
Thing #4: Talking Too Much About The Past Relationship With Your Ex
Have you ever seen fight club?
What’s the most famous scene from that movie,
I always think about that scene when I am confronted with a scenario like this.
Imagine for a moment that things are actually going pretty great with your ex and you mess it up by talking about your past relationship ALL OF THE TIME.
The first rule of Ex Recovery is you do not talk about your past relationship.
The second rule of Ex Recovery is YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT YOUR PAST RELATIONSHIP.
I understand why you are doing it.
Human beings are wired for closure and explanation.
What’s the first thing you think about when I throw something like this up?
Well, if you are anything like me you probably look at that and think it’s an incomplete circle and think about how ever fiber of your being seeks to close that circle.
The same principle kind of applies to your past relationship.
You are probably sitting there and look at it like it’s unfinished business.
There are probably burning questions that you need answers to and the only person who has those answers is your ex.
The problem is that nothing can annoy or anger an ex more than having you ask about why the two of you broke up time and time again.
I know it’s difficult but you need to refrain from constantly asking your ex why.
Why is a dangerous question.
Generally I see two things happen in situations like this.
Firstly, you can accept the fact that you may never get an answer to your questions.
However, if you do have to get closure then make sure you ask them when your ex is so invested into a relationship with you that they can’t leave.
That’s the right way to get your answers.