What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You On (The Phone, Facebook, WhatsApp, Etc)

2,553 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You”

Kassandra

December 7, 2019 at 6:07 pm

Dear Chris; dear Shaunna,

My ex blocked me as a reaction to a farewell message I sent him: I told him that I’d unfollow/unfriend because I’m trying to move on. He reacted by blocking me on Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp. That was the 3rd week of October. We emailed once a week for about 3 weeks until mid-November. In our first email exchange, I apologised for the farewell message and owned up that I wrote it in a very emotional moment.

I looked into Instagram’s privacy settings. My account is public, so apparently he can still see my posts even though he blocked me. I’ve kept posting about my hobbies and activities as usual. I changed my gmail and Facebook profile pics to a selfie that I think speaks of deepening confidence (he always said I’m way too insecure). I genuinely feel good about that photo, but I can’t tell if he’s checked up on me or not.

This is the end of my 3rd week of No Contact. Does anything in this article apply to him and why he went so far as to block me?

PS. I described my situation under another article, so I don’t want to repeat it here (Kassandra, posted 21 Nov. 2019):
https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/when-not-to-use-the-no-contact-rule-on-your-ex-boyfriend/

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 8, 2019 at 11:37 pm

Hi Kassandra, so if your ex thinks you are too insecure then you need to show how you are very secure in yourself and that is doing things that appear Ungetttbale. So doing work on yourself and posting how great youre doing with your life is best way to go. For your ex to block you it would be the fact they feel the need to have space from you and that you were not going to give them that. Sending emotional messages are not part of the program so you are going to have to avoid doing anything like that after no contact

marcia

December 7, 2019 at 12:02 am

Hello to the Chris Seiter dream team!!!

My ex just re-appeared! After 1 year of ignoring my messages, I sent him this: ”finally I have a confession to make, please whenever you have time, open my fb chat”. Suddenly, 15 minutes later, I see a message from him, sent on a seperate thread marked ”secret, encrypted message”, where the chat warns me ”this message will be automatically deleted 10 seconds after reading”. I open the message and it said ”hello!”. That was all. Then his text dissappeared and the space was blank. I understand you can put a timer, and choose for how long you want the message to stay visible, anything from 10 secs, to 1 day. He put a timer for 10 secs. Just to say ”hello” then ghost. How weird!

I didn’t reply anything, because I don’t want my message to be automatically deleted in 10 secs. One hour later, I see he blocked me on that secret conversation thread as well and I can no longer reply.

Does this look to you like someone playing games, hiding, re-appearing, re-blocking. Or could he be married. What else could such a behavior be! If after 1 year of no contact I am still worth playing games, is this a good sign? I feel so entertained!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 8, 2019 at 10:33 pm

Hi Marcia, your ex may have blocked you as you sent the text asking him to go onto fb messenger and then ignored his message. Rather than games I think its a failed attempt of communication

Na

December 4, 2019 at 2:22 pm

Hi

I have been dating/texting this guy for >2 years.. we met for less than 15 times as he was too busy with work. 8 months later he was also then attached overseas for work.

Recently he block me.. because i miss him alot and kept annoying him – asking when will he be back, if he could at least give me a 5 mins call.. Worst, I stupidly went to say I have others guys who want me.. this is when he said “nevermind, you can go for other guys. Ok bye” and blocked me.

I panicked and use other sim card to text him and he blocked me everywhere.

Up till today, it has been 2 weeks since he blocked me..

He is a nice guy, guess I am too temperamental.. How could I get him back?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 4, 2019 at 10:40 pm

Hey Na, so the best chance to get your ex back is to follow the process starting with no contact and then building up your connection with them again

marcia

November 30, 2019 at 9:08 pm

Ah, my ex doesn’t ever unblock my messages, I tried again sending a message, and still it won’t go through. So, there is no way I can message him and send him the letter of closure that I have prepared, or a friendly message, or anything at all…

So, I went to one of his public photos in facebook and posted a jolly sticker underneath. Just to remind him I exist, and am not angry. Definitely he saw it. He didn’t react to it with a like, but he didn’t delete it either. But we all know, that you do get a notification when someone adds a sticker on your photo!

So he is openly ignoring me. As if he is in a coma for 1 year, or he moved to Mars. He should go a step forward and block me fully! One year on ”message ignore” and I still can’t understand his reasons. Just a big ”why” floats in my head and I am crying…. Chris says we should forget someone after 8 months… Should I block him I wonder? But no! That will prove my hurting. I won’t give him that satisfaction. Also, we are connected on Instagram, and I don’t want to block him everywhere. I want to keep tabs on him – I am curious to see if scared men really move to Mars 🙂

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 1, 2019 at 1:02 am

Hi Marcia, if you are still this upset about being partially blocked after 12 months of being apart I suggest you do some work on becoming Ungettable and maybe consider therapy to help you with your emotions on how to move past whats happened in the past

Jennifer

November 27, 2019 at 5:05 pm

My boyfriend broke up with me last Tuesday and haven’t spoke since last Friday. We were together for 2 months and then BAM it’s over and it’s mainly about me hanging up on him a few times when I did it like what he had to say, apparently I was getting mad when he was expressing his feelings and now he blocked me on Facebook and that is it. Is there a chance for us to get back together after the NC is up or should I move on

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 28, 2019 at 9:49 pm

Hey Jennifer, so following the program is giving yourself your best chance. In the mean time I would look at how to communicate healthily during a relationship

Patricia

November 25, 2019 at 9:55 pm

My ex and I have been back in contact with each other for a month or so via text/phone calls. The interaction has been really positive. He’s talked about future and things. However, he still has me blocked everywhere on social media. I really can’t gather why I still would be. He knows I’m still on there…and I know he’s still active because he’s sent me pictures and things he’s posted. It’s a bit strange for me, but I don’t want to bring it up.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 26, 2019 at 7:57 pm

Hi Patricia, so I think its good you havent mentioned it to him as this shows you are “not bothered” so continue to not mention being blocked. Wait for him to unblock you and even then dont request adding him wait to see if he is willing to make the first moves

Alice

November 25, 2019 at 5:48 pm

Heyyyy!
I really like my ex so when he broker up with me I did all the desperate things that could have been done. I did it all. To the point that he said that he doesnt exist to me anymore. And blocked me on the cell.
After that I didnt said a word to him but then I decided to say Hi on WhatsApp.
He responded: tell me
And I asked if everything was fine. He said yes and asked me what did I needed.
I panicked and said that I had a math problem that I already have done.
Two days later, I said hey again and again he told me that he didnt exist.
I still wanted to know the limits so I keep texting him and he blocked me on WhatsApp.
Then, I panicked and went to see how to unblock myself on WhatsApp on the web. And after all that trying I wasnt any WhatsApp group including the college ones. I had an chemistry assingnement to that day and didnt had my colleges saved numbers… So I had to get um touch with my ex on Instagram so that he could include me in the groups. And then I could take my colleges numbers. He refused to do so. And blocked me on Instagram. I had to call him with a private number and ask him to please put me in the groups. He didnt do it… However I got the chance to get in the groups a while after though a Instagram girl that I asked a lot. The paper was delivered. But after all this I got blocked on everything.
I acted like a crazy girl! He said that I was insane but I never dos something like this.
What do I do now?
Is there a chance?
Should I avoid him in college?
I just wanna be unblocked… I CAN CONTROL MYSELF!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 26, 2019 at 8:33 pm

Hi Alice, it sounds like you’ve gnatted him and your college friends. Try to reign yourself in do a No contact and work on yourself for some time. your nc should be 45 days

marcia

November 24, 2019 at 12:09 am

Hi to the Chris Seiter great Team!

I wanted to give to any interested readers some info, as I have done some facebook research, and found out that my ex only has read my first message to him, then he pressed ”ignore messages”. Since then, all my messages that I have sent in the next 3 months, have been deleted straight, before him reading anything! That is a big shock, as it was common knowledge that you can read any messages secretely on Flight Mode, but apparently, if you use this feature, facebook will state ”message delivered” which betrays that the message was read in secret! So, girls, if you get ”message delivered” you will know he has definitely seen the message, although facebook will state is as ”unread”.

I never got ”message delivered” so now I am sure he did not read my messages, not even in secret. He pressed ”delete” immediately, to everything I have sent.

Now I want to send him one last message (1 page long) in which I confess something to explain my behaviour, plus to say goodbye to him, and then I will feel relieved and will leave him alone. So I want to start with the words ”I have a confession to make”. But I can’t send it on facebook, he will delete it again before reading!

So I thought to send a text to his mobile, asking ”may I send you something I would like you to read on your facebook or any e-mail address?”. Then I will wait for a reply. If he sends me an e-mail address, or if he accepts the message in facebook, I will e-mail him my letter. Otherwise, if he ignores that too, I am doomed, and I can never send him this letter. But I need to send him this letter, to get closure. I really need it. If I send this letter, then I can move forward with my life. I can’t move forward if I don’t at least declare a closure.

I can’t think of any other way to reach him. I don’t want to send him the letter via a new facebook acount, as this will look so creepy. I probably am the most desperate girl over here, looking to craft ways to beg him to read this 1 page that I have written for my closure and peace of mind. Is there anything else, that I haven’t thought of? My head is so stuck….

If I send ”I don’t recognise you any more, so sad to see you are not the person I met”, will this appeal to a man, and make him reply?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 24, 2019 at 12:20 am

No that message is not going to appeal to him, if you want him to reply you need to work on a message that is going ot be friendly and about his interests. Read some more of Chris articles to help you work out what you need to be reachign out with

Taylor

November 17, 2019 at 7:32 pm

Hey! So I dated this guy for 2 months almost 3…literally the relationship was perfect and we got along great and never fought. While we were still dating I had I really bad month: I was being tested for cancer and a family member died. During all this stuff he was gone on vacation and wasn’t able to be there for me. He came back and we talked about it went on a date and he had all these cute presents for me. The wee after he was kind of quite so I tried being there for him and giving him space and basically everything I could think of to make him feel better. I decided to write him a bunch of cute letters. The day I was being the letters and meeting him he texted me saying he lost interest and it was over… while he was out that night I dropped off all his letters and belongs at his house. He later texted me saying that the letters mad him feel bad about what he did. We didn’t talk for a week then met up to talk about the break up. He said I was perfect and did everything right but for some reason he lost interest. We ended up talking for 5 hours about random stuff and laughing and sharing memories. He would hint and ask what I would do if he tried kissing me or asked me out again. I was getting mixed signals. The next week he would send me messages asking about my dating life and joking about how bad of a driver I am. Later that week I had something terrifying and personal happen to me and he drove to me to be there for me. He then went on to tell people about my personal incident and I got mad at him. After I got mad he blocked me on Snapchat and phone. We didn’t talk for 3 weeks and I reached out with a simple instagram message and he blocked me there too… i have theories that my bad month caused him to lose interest because I wasn’t myself but I don’t understand how it went from perfect to him blocking me so fast (especially when I was going through stuff). His friends say he cares for me but needs space… should I just give up?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 23, 2019 at 11:35 am

Hi Taylor, the sounds of it the amount of pressure that took place in such a short amount of time for a relationship is why you feel things went from good to bad so quickly. You need to give it some time a full No Contact where you work on yourself and try to get over the hurt and the troubles you have been having lately. Then when you are in a better emotional and mental place you can approach your ex and try to have a positive conversation as friends not about your past. And re build your connection

Kara

November 14, 2019 at 3:54 pm

My ex blocked me on all social media, but still continues to text me and we’ve even hooked up a couple of times. But I’m still blocked. He just recently blocked me on twitter as well. We weren’t fighting or didn’t have a disagreement we actually just hooked up the night before. When I’ve asked In the past he said it’s because he doesn’t want to get in his feelings if I go out or if I post I’m with somebody else. That’s confusing if he just wants to be friends right?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 14, 2019 at 11:26 pm

Hi Kara, so if you want your ex back as a boyfriend you need to stop hooking up with him. As for him blocking you on social media even though you are not arguing or fighting right now he may be trying to hide his actions. So you need to do another NC if you havent already done one. Sticking to ignoring him until you have no spoken in a month and work on yourself in that time to make you UG

JC

November 13, 2019 at 2:37 pm

Hi,

So my boyfriend of 5 years recently broke up with me nearly 2 months ago now. throughout our relationship we had our pitty arguments like everyone else has. We was currently saving to buy a house in the new year and to start a family. Which we bothered talked about and he especially was looking forward to this as well. One mornings he basically said he had enough, he didn’t want to fight for our relationship because he thought we had tried and tried in the past for (me) to ‘change’ which by that he just says my attitude. However no one is prefect. Throughout our whole relationship even to the very end he used to tell me every day he loves me kisses me cuddled me just like a normal relationship. From day 1 of the break up I tried to ring and get him to speak to me to sort things out I even tried going round face to face to see him wrote him a letter, however he blocked me but I kept finding my way to speak to him as I needed answers as to way he said all the things he wanted for our future to now doesn’t want anymore. This is what is has been like for the past 6weeks and each time I speak to him hes just horrible and tell me to ‘move on’ and that he doesn’t want to see or speak to me. however, I have asked him over the phone if he still loves me and he says yes and ask him how he can get over it so quickly but he says he isn’t. but I can’t get my head around if he still loves me and isn’t over me why doesn’t he want to speak to me does it mean he doesn’t miss me and not bothered. How he can throw 5 years away like that. Throughout his time I have heard of someone of our mutual friends that he felt pressured which I think he meant about the house next year. I just don’t know what to do I miss and love him I just want to be able to talk to him and sort things out but he won’t.
Stephanie

November 10, 2019 at 4:28 pm

I made the mistake of txting my ex yesterday. It’s been 2 weeks since our last interaction in which he told me he was moving forward with his life. Which I would assume he’s dating the girl he was cheating on me with. I txted him something nice, “I was going through my phone and deleting some old things and saw this video of you and it made me laugh and think of you” he then blocked me on Instagram and also blocked my number. Don’t you think that’s extreme and cruel??? What would be the rationale behind that? I know I’ve been working on trying to move on from it but why do I still feel this attachment to him that I can’t shake. Is there any hope?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 10, 2019 at 8:52 pm

Hi Steph so the reaction is because youve done this too soon, ( you should have been in a 45 day NC first) and then knowing he was with someone else now hes probably been shouted at by his new girl for having your number still. If you want to get him back you need to do a proper 45 day NC and read about the being there method. Do the quiz on this site and read some articles that are valid to your situation, and make sure you do some Ungettable girl work too

Bri

November 9, 2019 at 12:03 am

Hi,
So this might be lengthy but I am so lost as to what to do. My ex and I went no contact after I took a few months of sending long paragraphs of crap. Long story short, after using no contact and messaging, we were finally getting back to good terms. He then told me that he was in a relationship, so I went no contact again. After a week, he messaged me saying he missed me and we started talking again. However, he would wait until I messaged him, or would only message when he was drunk about all the things that reminded him of me.
I know that the relationship we had was the best he has ever had and vice versa. Over the last two weeks, I was getting frustrated as I had followed him back on social media but he did not bother to. And was following girls back but not me. So I knew this was a spiteful act on his part since I had taken him off everything to begin with.
I ended up acting up spontaneously and lashed out because he would take forever to respond to my messages and I know he would check whatsapp to see if I had changed my pictures (he only used whatsapp for me). I know that people get busy and before we ended and started talking again, this sort of waiting time on conversations was never a problem. However, for some odd reason this time it really bothered me that he was almost playing a game with me. He had also just started using endearing names with me which I was sure he was still invested in me. But I also feel like he needed to stop these games cause we had never started off with a problem like this.
So he responded aggressively stating that he didn’t owe me anything and I agree, he didn’t. So, on spontaneity, I too responded with a lot more harsher words stating that I was travelling to meet up with someone and spitefully sent him pictures of a guy I was talking to.
We went back and forth and he insulted me as Chris described in this article on something very personal. However, I did not react to it until… well until a few days after. He sent me a message stating that he did not want to hear from me ever again and I sent him one last long message the day after.
To get back at him for the personal insult about me, while I was on vacation – I sent him a picture of me dressed up and looking really hot and commented on the insult he had given me in retaliation. He opened it right away within the second. However, he then decided to block my number off whatsapp at 2:30 in the morning after that message (I am sure this decision was made at that hour with a lot of alcohol in his system as well).
Well, now and for the past week, I have been blocked on whatsapp but not any social media.
I also know that he is checking whatsapp as I have asked a couple of friends to add the number to see if he goes online every now and then. I know that when someone blocks you they are still able to check up on your pictures and changes made but I can’t do anything because he has blocked me.
So at this point, I have stepped away and going to go with the no contact rule. But, how long does this blocking persist until? It is driving me insane. I know that I made a mistake but so did he with the insult.
Confused.and.Unsure

November 1, 2019 at 10:11 pm

Hi,
So my ex and I were together for about 8 months, we broke up at the beginning of October. So we broke up, and I had moved in so I had gone to see him the day after we broke up to try and talk about it. (We had broke up while he was at work the night before and I had gone to stay at my mom’s). So we had talked the night I had finished moving my stuff and had agreed to co parent our cat. I left her under the pretense we could co parent her and I would still see her and I didn’t want to uproot her so quickly from the place she’d been calling home. And I knew I would need to get settled. So the night that I finished moving out, he told me that he still loved me but he needed to work on himself. A few days after the break up, I contacted him about visiting or picking up the cat so I could spend sometime with her before I went out of town. And then he messaged me saying that he couldn’t talk to me yet as it was too painful and then blocked me (Phone and fb). I went into NC after, trying to get my life back in order. I still haven’t heard from him and I’m still blocked, it’s been about 3 weeks. Is there any chance in him unblocking me? Do you think we still have a chance?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 2, 2019 at 9:21 pm

Hey so following the program yes there is a chance but you need to put in the work during your NC to become the Ungettable girl while you are blocked

Ki

October 31, 2019 at 7:54 pm

Hi, so I’ve been reading your articles and they have been keeping me kinda sane and together. My ex boyfriend and I broke up around 7/8 months of being together. We had moved in, gotten a cat together and were planning our lives. So since then after the third day I got in contact with him about visiting our cat that we had agreed to coparent. He blocked me. I was hurt (still am or I guess I wouldn’t be commenting on here) but still I’ve been getting on with my life, business as usual, friends and everything else. Working on me and even have put the no contact rule into effect for myself (badly at first but then more effectively). But this was after I had seen him and yes, I admit I cried and begged but then realized it wasn’t helping either of us. I’m trying to figure out why he blocked me when all I had asked was about seeing my cat? And if there’s even a chance he’d unblock me. I’m not fully blocked but he has blocked me from fb and my phone number. I’m about 2 weeks into effective no contact and nothing has changed. Last time we spoke before he blocked me, he had said he still loved and wanted to be with me but then he blocked me. I’m hurt and confused even though I’m working on myself I’m still looking for answers to calm my mind.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 2, 2019 at 9:58 pm

It sounds like he is confused about his feelings himself so complete a NC and work on yourself in that time so that you are happy with your life again then reach out as a friend to just have a short positive conversation

That.hidden.heart

October 31, 2019 at 8:04 am

A case of total block out. Point of never return! He blocked me from everywhere. It’s been 10months complete. I moved on. I am enjoying my life a lot. Life is better ofcourse.
But deep down, I still feel crushed. I want him to know what he lost. I want him to see me atleast. I am in touch with his friends and they see me on social media. But this feeling is too strong to hurt him. Because the damage he caused was destructive and vast. What should I do?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 31, 2019 at 10:46 pm

When you feel this and you havent had the closure you wanted, write it all in a letter and when youre done writing it all down – dispose of the letter somewhere no one else will find it, I’d suggest burning it if you can do so safely…. its a way to get the feelings and anger out on paper and releasing them from your mind so you dont carry that weight around any more. Social media and mutual friends – you can show how youre living your best life now and not phased about him. Or post some photos of possible new guys in your life too. That will get back to him through friends too.

Hannah

October 27, 2019 at 4:19 pm

Hello guys, does NC works also for those who weren’t in relationships only on dates? And got into fight? Should I apologise after NC or write something more optimistic/fun? Help me out.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 27, 2019 at 7:55 pm

Hi Hannah, if the dating was more than 3 months then yes – dont apologise after a NC unless you cheated. You would reach out with a positive text instead

Happy

October 17, 2019 at 10:01 am

Hi!

What if I ended up hurting him due to my mental illness and forgot that he is also suffering. I don’t want to see him suffer because of me and I said things that I do not meant. I ended up saying that I will set him free. Then he accepts it. Then suddenly kicks me that I have should not said that and I started to beg him to stay? He thought I was acting up and playing with his feelings but no. He ended up saying a favor and he is willing to wait for me and talk after I have done his favor? After our conversation, He already blocked me. Is it ok that my ex blocked me?
He also said that he can’t trust me for now.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 20, 2019 at 9:37 pm

Hi Happy so you need to do a NC and then approach him as a friend to regain the trust and attraction

Anon

October 15, 2019 at 11:38 pm

Thank you Shaunna, I will post UG stuff on my social media even though he probably won’t see it. I think it’s about time I start to focus on me, because he’s been doing it this whole time while I’ve been busy trying to understand him and why he broke up with me out of nowhere. I guess I was just confused on why HE reached out to me after we finally stopped talking, but then blocked me. I love your advice and I hope to see some progress within myself in these coming months. I doubt that he will come back because he’s emotionless and stubborn, but I’ll use social media to my advantage!
Ann

October 15, 2019 at 1:54 am

What if he doesn’t have social media and I’m blocked on the phone and I’m pretty sure email?? Would a letter help? He’s very artsy and a poet.

I’ve been working on myself and am in the middle of no contact. My anxiety and ADHD was left uncontrolled and I never mentioned it to him. I believe it could’ve been a reason. And feel that if i work on this it could make our relationship come back stronger.

We’ve broken up and got back together before

We had plans, he canceled, blocked me randomly and ghosted me. (He never done this before-the ghosting) I blew up his phone because I found out I was blocked. But haven’t contacted him since 10/1/19. He’s said before he blocked me that he likes me a lot and ticks the boxes for what he looks for. We were together for 9 months going on 10.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 15, 2019 at 6:45 pm

Hi Ann the best thing you can do is complete a NC and then i would try to reach out via text. Letter is something you’d consider doing when youve tried EVERYTHING ELSE first.

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2,553 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You”