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Marie
June 16, 2014 at 7:48 pm
So me and my ex were together for about a year and 3 months. We were friends 3 years before we started dating. He was always trying to get me and I always turned him down. I was the type of girl that didn’t date anyone. Got asked out all the time but I always turned everybody down. Well he got into a relationship with a girl and I realized that I had some feelings for him and I was so upset. They didn’t last very long. We started talkin and dated each other after about 2 months of talkin. Well he’s the type of guy who is easily and constantly influenced by his friends. His friends aren’t exactly good influences. We had a break for about a week and this was about 10 months into our relationship. He started being a jerk to me and he was actin like his friends. Well about a month later we broke up. We were broke up about a month and a half. We got back together for about 3 months.We just recently broke up about 9 days ago. Everytime we break up it’s because of the same reason. He gets bored with a relationship and wants to “run wild”. He’s 19 and so am I. I don’t understand how he can say he loves me but then say he doesn’t wanna be tied down. We were talkin about gettin a place and everything and then outta nowhere he started gettin distant. He started takin me for granted and quit respectin me. He was my first everything! I was his first love. I’m always he one to break up with him. The night I broke up with him, Saturday he started posting pictures of Facebook of him and his friends. I deleted him and quit following him on Instagram. He owed me 20 bucks. Sunday he called and texted me about where to get my money. Well the following day Monday he texted me askin if I got my money. Well Monday night I put a picture up on Instagram. It said if you can’t appreciate my presence then appreciate my absence. That same night he quit following me and he made a status about it. My brother showed me this btw. Well Tuesday, he made another status sayin the trick to survival is to know what to throw away and know what to keep. It was definitely aimed at me. I been on NC for 7 days now. I have no idea what’s goin on in his head. Can you please tell me if and possibly when he’ll try to contact me? I don’t want him out of my life for good. I just feel like he doesn’t care. He told me that he wanted to settle down with me but he wanted to run wild.
admin
June 17, 2014 at 8:29 pm
How long did you two date for?
Marie
June 18, 2014 at 12:27 am
A total of a year and 3 and a half months.
Marie
June 19, 2014 at 12:36 pm
Tuesday night my ex asked my bestfriend about me. She said he looked sad. Yesterday I tried to add em as a friend on Facebook. I figured we could at least be civil. He texted me sayin why the hell would you delete me then try to add me? I told him I was bein nice but I won’t do that anymore. He texted back sayin you know we can’t be friends. We couldn’t before and we never will be. I can’t look at you like a friend. I said okay well sorry I even bothered. He said you’re not botherin me but I can’t look at you without thinkin it. I said we were friends for 3 years and best friends for a year. I’m sorry I don’t want you completely out of my life but if that’s how you feel that’s cool too. I wish you the best of luck. He texted back sayin you know we can’t be friends. We’re like magnets once were around each other were stuck together. I said okay just forget it. Is it just too early for him to come around? Has he not been hit with the realization of the break up yet? It’s only been a little over a week.
CuteAndConfused
June 16, 2014 at 3:19 pm
So confused.
I am in a relationship with a guy everything had been great, great conversation phone calls. I know that communication for long periods of time during the day can be a bad thing but I enjoyed our conversations through text and calls tremendously. We have slept together twice and he’s is good at reinforcing positive attention and affection day hours after and during the day which made me secure. We’ve been on numerous dates. Now the text and calls are minimum. When I asked will I see him he says no. He still text and calls but like I said its everyday but limited. Good morning text calls me babe. I am thinking about starting the NC program bc I don’t know what else to do. I have already discussed that things are changing and he insist they are no but it seems to be getting worse where he’ll text I answer then he doesn’t respond anymore and I won’t hear from him until a good morning text the next day. Please help! Should I do the ignore nc or am I being paranoid he currently text good morning babe and I didn’t respond yet just invade I need to start ignoring him so that he shapes up!
admin
June 17, 2014 at 8:22 pm
When did the breakup occur before you got this text?
CuteAndConfused
June 19, 2014 at 2:41 am
Before… We never officially said were broken up its just dissipating no real conversation. We used to speak everyday now once a day with no text as of yesterday I never responded to his last text in fear that’s all it will be after my reply. Silence!
CuteAndConfused
June 22, 2014 at 12:48 pm
I haven’t seen him now going on three weeks just good morning text or that one check in text during the day no calls or anything. It’s pretty much over. I don’t know what to do. I’ve already stated on a no confrontational way of prioritizing he responded he’s no stopping his plans. So I’m pretty much done. Bc I can do with out throne text per day he initiates I reply then silence. No calls. When I did ignore him for and entire day he had an heart attack and text why he hadn’t heard from me but something it’s up.
admin
June 22, 2014 at 3:47 pm
So, you have one more week of NC left?
CuteAndConfused
June 22, 2014 at 9:40 pm
No I never really started it bc I wasn’t sure if it would work for me. I told him it was over. I text to see if he would make up an excuse about seeing me he did. I told him I didn’t want to do this anymore bc I feel he’s lying no response after I text. So I will be starting today. I told him I deleted all his pictures and I believe he has someone else although I have no proof but his actions says he does. I’m hurt.
alice
June 16, 2014 at 12:59 pm
My boyfriend broke up with my 3ish weeks ago and we were talking after it about why he decided to end things. We were together for nearly 2 years. He ended things because it was “better in the long run”. And because his family would not accept me (religious differences), however, neither of us are specifically religious. We are both 23 years old and we had a really good healthy relationship. I offered to change religions to help us be together but he wouldn’t accept this and said “it wasn’t worth it”. He said he “misses me a lot and is finding it hard to not talk but that he thinks it is the best thing to do”. It has been 4 days since the no contact. I really do want him back but he seems to have made a firm decision about the break up. Should I continue the no contact for 30 days?? Is there any hope??
viva
June 15, 2014 at 10:04 am
Hi Chris,
I am doing a 90 day NC and I am 30 days in. My ex has been contacting me a lot, and usually i would be happy about it… but now i feel that i deserve better and should do my best to move on completely. I was a mess when I first started, now I feel like I am growing into a stronger woman. Thank you for creating this guide, you have really helped me a lot. You should make a post on “life after a breakup”
Anonymous
June 14, 2014 at 11:14 pm
My issue is just totally surprising and heartbreaking I have kept my NO CONTACT RULE SINCE MARCH 24 2014 a day before this day I meet my boyfriend of two years right after our evening meeting/date night he drops me home I send him a text in the morning saying good morning love u miss u .. I woke up so I thought I should msg him but then I see that even though he read my msg he was busy on his Facebook talking to other girls. YES TALKINH EXCHANING NUMBERS ASKING TO GO ON DATES I HAVE KNOWN HIM SINCE MY TEENAGE YEARS WHEN I WAS 18 NOW I AM 24.PRIOR TO THIS I FOUND OUT HE HAD MORE THAN OnE FB which he lied about. I was in one of them as his “in a relationship”. I never knew about his other two facebooks until one I found durning downloading fb messenger which showed the contacts number which are using it other I found 2 months after he said sorry I love u also he has asked me to marry him. Ii want to be on my own feet and said in a yr or two I my LOST MY VIRGNITY TO HIM I WAS 22 he currently just turned 30 in march 2014 I ACCEPTED HIM AS MY EVERYTHING I GAVE HIM MY ALL AND HE LIED TO ME CONTINUOUSLY WHY ?? Well this time I had enough and u sent him a text the next day after we meet well technically the day after I meet him because he did not reply that day he was busy on Facebook uploading his picx talking to other girls and when I confronted him he did not reply and then I cursed him out and then all he said was WE ARE DONE is this fair .. And no I am not ugly I have the body girls dream of and the perfect face to it as well. He always says I’m sexy beautiful nice words when we had conversations I do not understand why guys treat girls who are really pretty have everything a guy wants in a girl like this please I need you to tell me we have had no contact in our two yr relatio ship before but it was 1 week 2 week a month and have not meet 3 months we use to meet once a week very Sunday but he started ditching me for his cricket game he has with his friends and wanted me to meet when he is off work which is on a weekday I also work and go to colg in process of becoming a medical administrative and tech he drives a yellow cab we are from new York I’m from Brooklyn he is from the Bronx I do not drive he drives a mustang and Benz he has time to meet his friends and talk to other girls on Facebook and pass his number after he did all this with me why ? I need to know from someone outside my circle to answer this. From that day uptil now I have not contact him at all but I see him using his other 2 Facebook which I caught and blocked me from the one he had me on when he said WE ARE DONE. I HAVE SELF RESPECT I NEVER CONTACT WHEN A GUY DOES THIS TO ME ANY OF MY EXS FROM THE PAST WHO HAVE CHEATED THEY NEVER GET A CHANCE BUT HE TOOK MY VIRGINITY HE NEEDED THE CHANCE BUT HOW MANY CHANCES HE SO COLDHEARTED HOW CAN HE DO THIS TO ME IM SO HURT BUT I AM SO STRONG ASWELL. ANOTHER THING WE BOTH ARE PAKISTANI MUSLIM IM BORN HERE in brooklyn AND HE CAME to the Bronx from pakistan WHEN HE WAS 13 (my parents are cool about getting me married to who I want and so is his) I do not have a strict FAMily as you hear about Pakistani but we are cultured. I am just hurt and dissapointed I do know whenever he contacts me in life again he knows he will be sorry for what he did like he always is
Anonymous
June 14, 2014 at 11:30 pm
I also forgot to mention he meet one of the girl I caught him red handed with he took her out on date to a resturant she claims there was no sexual contact or touching kissing but she says he use to talk like a bf to her on the phone another girl I caught him talking to was he asking for her number but she did not give these two girls were from TANGO BUT ALSO ADDED ON HIS OTHER FB WHICH I DID NOT KNOW ABOUT WELL AFTER I FOUND OUT HE DELETED THEM FROM FB AND TANGO BUT HE STILL HAS OTHER GIRLS SHOWING PICTURES HE LIKED AND IN FRIENDS LIST HE HAS NOT BLOCKED ME FROM THE OTHER TWO FACEBOOM WHICH ARE TECHNICALLY LOOKING LIKE FOR HIS sluts but they all look like sults showing way to much skin some are not even close to good lookinh some are average and some are not bad looking but all different races. This all has been happening in two year of out relationship from DEC 2012 HE LIKED GIRLS PICX HE HAD MADE BOTH THESE PROFILES FEW MONTHS BEFORE we meet we first meet in nov 4 2012 after this month he has talked to girls and meet one I told u about rest he talks to on WhatsApp Viber tango and all these apps these sites are causing problems in a lot of relationships I see in this generation please help me out and give me a advice on what I should do
admin
June 15, 2014 at 6:16 pm
So, what do you need help with?
Anonymous
June 15, 2014 at 7:13 pm
I need to from my side is everything I’m doing good with the no contact because I’m not contacting and won’t contact because everything that happened is his fault and he needs to man up so until then I am just keeping the no contact and I just told u all this so you can understand my situation and let me know if I’m doing good from my side and I should be the one who should get the apology and not him because after I cursed him is when he came with the response we are done
jordyn
June 14, 2014 at 4:40 pm
Hey chris. I dont understand what is going on anymore. I stopped contacting him again and after another 15 days he continued to message me and when I didnt reply he stopped for a day then would message me again. Still I did not reply, then I started noticing his friends more and more most of whom wouldnt really say hi or anything. Then I would see his family a little more, this all went on for about a week in a half till just 4 days ago. A friend invited me and my bf to go shoot pool. We get to the place and I saw many of my exs friends there as well I thought ok whatever and once we go outside to have a cigarette my ex is walking up to the entrance. Of course we were all upset or mad. In the end we decided to just go to a different part of the building and shoot pool. Sure enough about 10 min in playing my exs best friend is walking back and forth from our table then stays for a long period of time in the bowling area right next to our table. The guys im with wanted to play air hockey so I continue with pool. About 5 min later I see them get mad and just take a seat at the table behind where im playing. I asked them who won and they didnt say anything. So when I finished the game they said they wanted a cigarette so as we r having one my bf said we should go your ex was watching you. I asked how he said where the food area is, he kept popping up and standing there acting like hes waiting then would literally watch you play he must have done that 4 times! Then he asked if we can go I said thats fine im just gonna use the restroom then we can. I went in and went to the one away from the pool tables and when I came out my ex was there. He started asking how I was doing and what ive been up to. And told him nothing just work and keeping myself busy. We talked for about 6 more minutes and during that my ex made every attempt to touch my shoulder or chin or stomach and then said so i know your birthday is coming up when is that? I told him this friday he goes o great thats kool. Then he asked who im with and told him my bf and friend and then immidiatly talked about his gf. And then said yea i thought about you the other day. I looked surprised then he gets a weird look and said i dont know why. I said to him wow way to make that sound like a bad thing. He asked how i told him just the tone and look you had made it seem like the worse. He laughed and then his friend walks over and said hey its ur turn man. Sadly that particular friend of his works with me at my store. And then my ex said ok well its so nice seeing you and then gives me a big hug. I then left with my bf and friend. They were both mad both with me and with him. I Iet it go sure enough my birthday was yesterday and I didnt get anything from my ex. The thing im getting really tired of is he keeps me within reach saying nothing to me but then when I start to pull away he starts talking and now what looks like if I ignore he will come look for me. Why does he do this?
admin
June 15, 2014 at 6:14 pm
Does he ever rely on you emotionally?
jordyn
June 15, 2014 at 8:38 pm
I would say so. He was always able to be himself around me. When ever a problem came about he always asked me to be there for him. But I geuss I just need to know now is should I just see if he wants to talk face to face? I just dont know what he wants anymore
jordyn
June 14, 2014 at 4:51 pm
And just for the record this particular place we went to is well known for the bar and games it has. Many people go there and my ex and I went there only about 3 times when we were together and that was a yr ago.
Summer
June 12, 2014 at 3:24 am
Should I tell my ex I’m doing NC or just stop communication all together? We’ve been trying to be friends so the communication lines are still open and there’s no bad blood.
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:20 pm
Just stop all communication altogether.
Smitten
June 9, 2014 at 4:19 pm
I have a very different situation.
I had a male friend, ok more than friends but we haven’t SEEN each other in 8 years. We have been friends for 21 years. I don’t know why he didn’t tell his wife of 8 years about me, but he didn’t and she found an email and went crazy 2 weeks ago. I don’t blame her but he told me he will NEVER talk to me again. Will the NC even work in this situation? He is my best friend
IM HURTING please HELP
admin
June 10, 2014 at 3:36 pm
OMG he didn’t tell his wife about you?
She basically forbids him to talk to you again?
Smitten
June 10, 2014 at 4:59 pm
Yes, that the gist of it. I don’t know since I can’t talk to him. We have been friends (a little more than) for 20 years. Will NC work? I am having a very hard time coping
Rony
June 7, 2014 at 8:49 pm
Hi chris .. me and my bf have been with each others since 2 and half yrs ago we had several breakups and things always tended to get solved in the end, 1 and half month ago i broke up with him after he asked me to be his friend and dropping the commitment issue, i refused and applied NC since then , the very second day he was knowing that me and him won’t talk but he he sent me msg on whatsapp to remind me how will i managr to get somthn which i’vealready was seeking his help in but that b4 the break up ofcourse, whateva , i replied ill manage , he continued to send me msgs every 4-3 days but i was sharply and very very very briefly replying then i stopped replying him at all although he officially asked me if i’d like to meet him as he travel 4 work and now he is on day off and again i didnt reply the thing which tended to make him angry on me so he blocked me on whatsapp (im blocked already on facebook even when we were in relation coz he believed that it causes us to un necesary fights!) whateva, just after he blocked me on whatsapp i blocked him bk on whatsapp and still im on my NC , 21 days l8r he unblocked me on whatsapp and i noticed that ofcourse but i didnt unblock him bk and im still on NC 4 around 45 days. what do u think of his reaction and what shud i do (N.B/ i broke up coz i declared to him that i want to be married to him and i love him and now i can’t accept any less)
admin
June 8, 2014 at 8:12 pm
Any reason why you are trying to do NC for 45 days?
Rony
June 12, 2014 at 5:22 pm
Im inlove with him .. i want to get married to him and i want commitment .. he changed his mind in the middle telling that he want me as a friend, yes that wasnt his 1st time to ask 4 my friendship and he turn things to relationship later every time he ask 4 friendship, he does … committed one also!) he is sooooo insecure and have a stupid dellusions abt females from his past history on general prospective although of he find me INCOMPARABLE and he tells that i reach a place in his heart comes close to his family whom he treasure the most btw but still we fight out of insecurities either from him or from me! 🙁 but i was allowing this b4 coz he was just out of divorce and i wanted him to be firmly planted when he ays love u and i want u or made any desicions, now 1 yr and 5 months passed on his divorce and he is much more psychologically settled than b4 and he is progressing in baby step ( i can see that clearly) but on other hand i can’t deal with him as a friend and continue that lie , he is NOT my friend , i adore him and im rly madly inlove with .. ain’t that enough?!
Melissa
June 7, 2014 at 8:36 pm
I’m confused on this NC thing…. if i have a stubborn guy (I’m pretty sure i do) its a stand off right? Well if he gives in and does contact me I’m not supposed to reply right? It does not say when i should reply…. just do not respond or contact. I need a time frame. My guy has been having his friend contact me every 3 days or so(or so it seems). His friend is talking about his personal life and will occasionally throw in a single text bringing up his name. I have been ignoring any information he gives me on him even though i want to tell the guy to give him a message. What are the rules on this?
admin
June 8, 2014 at 8:10 pm
Depends on when he contacts you. But generally yes… you aren’t supposed to contact him back.
Amber
June 7, 2014 at 11:46 am
My ex and I were together for 8 months, and he broke up with me a little over a week ago. We had had a fight at my house and I was angry, ended up ignoring him for 3 days. When I finally messaged him, he was angry and told me he wanted nothing more to do with me. A little backstory on him: he’s a rash, shoot from the hip kind of guy, quick to assume the worst, blame, attack. He was insecure and jealous of all my male contacts during the time we were together, and 95% of the fights we had had to do with his presumed fears and the way he attacked me with them. Whenever that would happen, I couldn’t afford to get upset and angry back because he would tell me it was over and he wanted nothing to do with me. Then he’d disappear for a while until I’d call, begging for him to hear me out. When that would happen I’d ask for some space but he always broke that and wanted to see me right away. We would do that and it would seem like the argument never even happened in his book. I know I’m not perfect but it’s crazy being accused of not wanting him or cheating…I never did cheat, for the record nor did I want anyone else. When we did talk after the last fight, 3 days later, he said really harsh and nasty things, and wouldn’t listen to a word I said. He told me I caused the break up and I needed to live with that. It was obvious to me he was really really hurt and angry. I tried to appeal, but then he’d say I can’t do this, give me space. I told him I really loved him and I was willing to do whatever it takes to make it better; then we stopped talking a day. Then, not hearing anything I tried again but again he said he stood by his decision and he wasn’t going back on the break up, that he needed to be single. I tried again to prove myself still loving, that I needed him and wanted to make him happy, but he kept shooting me down. He wouldn’t reveal his feelings or discuss anything. He was total steel to my emotions and words. I got angry because this was done through text and demanded a phone call at least, and despite the fact he was nicer on the phone, I cried and cried because he wouldn’t budge or hear me out. I felt like he made up his mind despite the fact I would have made it better had be just talked to me.
So after all that, he didn’t Facebook block me; in fact, he said he wanted to be friends. We talked a few times there about trivial stuff, but anytime I brought up feelings, he’d suggest not talking anymore and that he didn’t want to hate me.
I feel like he’s not even dealing with his feelings about me. He’s so resolute in dumping me. I know that he cared a lot for me, because he hurt so much. Would NC remotely work on this guy? We live an hour apart, but we have the same friends. I want to do what’s right by him, but I also want to move on if I stand no chances.
Sarah0000
May 31, 2014 at 2:33 pm
Me and my boyfriend split a year ago but haven’t done the no contact rule. I moved out but still kept seeing and sleeping with him. Just recently i went away with a friend for 1 night. I didn’t hear from him for the whole duration I was away. This upset me as my friend was receiving messages from her bf. when I got back I didn’t message him and later that day bumped into him at the shop. He said he was sorry for not getting in touch. And said he would call/txt. He later txt me saying
I love you soo much. And really hope one day it’l work out. Coz deep down i wana be with you for the rest of my life. Take care of your self and if you ever need anythin fone me. Il do anything for you xxx
Some background…….
We never argue-just go quiet for a little while and make up
He is 26 and I’m 23.
We’ve been together 5/6 years
We lived together for 3years
We haven’t cheated or argued
“Good, healthy break-up”
I’m on day 5 or NC…….he hasn’t contacted me yet
What are my chances of getting him back????
Nicole
May 27, 2014 at 7:35 pm
Hi,
I had a long distance relationship and we called it quits due to distance and fading feelings. I still miss him and unfortunately I follow his life from time to time over facebook, even though the first thing I did was deleting from skype, facebook, google+ and all the emails, messages and etc on whatsapp and phone, collecting and putting the gifts photos in a secret box and etc. I have done no contact for exactly 2 months. Couple days ago, i needed to ask him for an emergency. and he helped and in return asked me how i am doing. i said thanks i am doing fine and the mail was done there. Today I sent him an email, it was a friendly suggestion about his business since he is having a startup currently. Now I am wondering how he will answer. I do not know if i did something okay or if i shouldnt have sent him an email. Is it possible to get him back by showing interest to his life but acting like you are friendly? or does it give the sign that i am still thinking about him, his business and his life? please help me. I am afraid i look needy, which I do not wanna look like and i did something wrong. thanks for your suggestions in advance.
admin
May 28, 2014 at 2:48 pm
You might want to check out the long distance page.
Nicole
May 28, 2014 at 6:01 pm
Hi Chris Thanks for your response. I checked there as well. He answered like a day later. He wrote that my suggestions are awesome and this and that. He wrote right now it is a pretty tough time, he is doing this, that, work, new job, blah.. I did not ask anything and he is telling me all those stuff. It made me feel like he is just really happy that he broke up with me cuz he has so good life. I dont know what i should write to him. i will definitely not mention my life as he did not ask and i think it is none of his business. but rather i would like to congratulate him with some mixture of things from past. for example,i am especially happy for your job as i said earlier you should get a new one (like try to say I told you to do this and u were stubborn but look i am wise and thinking for your own good). or yes i remember the times you talked about that, it must be this (just to show i was listening and caring about him) and i would like to offer my help for his dissertation correction and check (as i always did and he always trusted me… like to show that he still needs me for some other aspects in his life) then I would like to send a gift package for his birthday with full of things he likes to eat while snowboarding like power bars, beef jerky and etc. since he cannot find those at the place he currently lives in. i just want him to remember our winter road trips, ski trips and etc. do you think all those things remind him of how good we were and trigger him to want me back or do you think his email talking about all crap he does and he is busy and happy means as a manifesto of the fact it ended and he is glad…? please let me know. i dont know what can happen exactly after no contact for 58 days. thanks!
Estelle
May 27, 2014 at 1:50 pm
Hi Chris, I followed your no contact rule, I did it for 10 days and I got my ex back, I cheated… But since we got back he has been loving and sweet, but lately I noticed I don’t havr much hold on him, like I use to before the break up, I’m thinking on going on a 14days no contact rule, plsssssss…. I need your advice, I really do.
admin
May 27, 2014 at 2:49 pm
Wait, did you get him back?
M
May 27, 2014 at 12:38 pm
Hi!
My bf broke up with me bc he had to go home to a different country. It’s now day 11 of NC, he contacted me yesterday (on day 10) with kind of a long text, lots of questions but very nice and very just “friendly”… he was basically asking what I’m up to/how I’m doing with lots of smiley faces, ha. I know I’m not supposed to respond (which is why I’ve made it one day without responding!) and still haven’t… but I’m scared b/c I know his family and friends there (I went to visit last year) and he’s the type that will act as a “victim” like you said so I could completely see him telling them that I totally ignored him.. and then I’m scared they’re encourage him to just move on, etc, and then he just wont ever try to communicate again and get the hint that it’s time to move on… but it’s not!! I know the answer to this question and I know what you will say but I guess I need some justification/a reminder why I should not respond? (our breakup ended on a really “good”/amicable note so I guess I also just feel kind of mean not responding..) Help set me straight por favor!
admin
May 27, 2014 at 2:49 pm
So, technically you two are long distance?
M
May 27, 2014 at 11:39 pm
Yeah, now we are, but he broke up before he left. So NC started pretty much the day after he got there. (Oh and he does not have FB!! His best friend does, and I know he’d get on that sometimes in the past if he ever wanted to look at something, but not even on a regular basis..)
Also, whenever I do text him back, do I address my silence (“sorry I’ve been.. blah blah”) or even answer his questions about what I’m up to (he knows I’m going overseas and was asking about that too), or do I basically text as though I’ve never even seen his text (like the examples you show in your other articles).. ? I have NOT responded yet but the only other influence I have right now is my own mother who sits next to me and is telling me to “respond tomorrow or else he’ll move on!” so if someone wants to balance this out…?! Thank you!
M
May 28, 2014 at 4:04 am
(There is actually SO much more to this story, which I wrote to you in an email… so I know you cannot respond to everything but I actually don’t think I can take any advice from your comments/articles on here until you know the whole context of my situation… and honestly, it’s very unique and I think it would be quite a challenge for you if you could actually read through the entire message I sent you…. yes this might be a challenge for you Chris! 😉 But moreso, if you want to really help a devout reader of your site… this is your chance because I am SO SO confused and actually literally will not take advice from anyone/not even your articles bc none of them are even close enough to my situtaion =/ But I’m so bad with anything guy-related that I know I can’t do this on my own. Please please help me. if you can recognize the email address?)
admin
May 28, 2014 at 2:54 pm
Challenging me…. which email did you send it to?
M
May 28, 2014 at 3:48 pm
The one that allows me to message you through this website?
admin
May 31, 2014 at 3:13 pm
The contact form?
Violet
May 25, 2014 at 5:09 am
Chris,
I broke up with my bf. he said I hope we can be friends but I said not for a long time bc I warned to heal. And I broke it off very suddenly and stopped talking to him which I know really probably hurt him. But I don’t think he would call or text even if he did miss me whether from ego , stubbornness, or apathy idk. But I texted him 18 days later saying sorry for breaking it off so suddenly bc. I know that was hurtful to hi and I do want to be friends bc I he knows everything about me etc. but he never texted back. Recently I found out that my phone has t been sending certain text messages to people or my calls wouldn’t show up on some peoples phones. A few people have told me they never. Got my voicemails and my texts have been delayed and I’m sure. Some lost. So now I don’t know if my text ever went through to him and idk what to do!? I don’t think he would text me bc I said I didn’t want to talk to him for like 5yrs and I said this is the last time we are Gonna talk and after this. We aren’t gonna talk again. And now I really regret it and miss him:( I want to talk to him. But idk if he got my message. What should I do.? What if is hurt him so much he never wants me back? I am on day 11 of nc after that message.
jordyn
May 24, 2014 at 1:34 pm
I really need advice badly, I hit day 16 of no contact when out of the blue my ex texted me asking how I was doing. I know I shouldn’t have messaged back but I did I tried to keep it simple with my answers I told him everything was fine and I was at work. Then he started asking me about my relationship im in now if the guy treats me well and if im happy. I told yes everything is going ok. He then started saying stuff like good im hoping u dont mess it up by getting pregnant and i hope he has grown up and stopped beating u. And before i read the entire message he apologized right away and said that was out of line, so i ignored it all and asked him about how he is doing with everything and his gf. And he kept saying everything was unbelievably great and couldn’t be happier. So I told him im glad hes happy and hope things go well for him and then he asked me if my relationship is really that great or if i believe it will fail. so i changed the subject and asked him about other things that we could always talk about whether it was movies books shows whatever. He stopped texting me so I then decided to just leave it off on a good note by saying well ok I gotta get going so again glad ur happy and glad everything worked out for u and glad we at least had somewhat of a conversation and he replied yeah u to. So my question is what was all that abi ut with him? Is he mad at me or something?
admin
May 25, 2014 at 2:30 pm
You broke nc… you know what that means.
jordyn
May 25, 2014 at 7:03 pm
Yes and no. I understand i shouldn’t have broken it but at the same time I was also just trying to make peace with him and didnt expect him to say stuff like that. So im still confused on two things 1. If I start over with no contact will it still work? 2. Is he mad at me or something?
admin
May 27, 2014 at 2:23 pm
1. Yes but itll be less effective.
2. I would be shocked if he isn’t. Breakups always make ppl mad.
Anna
May 24, 2014 at 3:43 am
So me and my ex have been together for over 5 years, lived together for 4 years and had a dog together. Out of the blue one day we had a little argument (I can’t even remember what about) and resulted in him freaking out and he kicked me out. So I went and stayed with a friend for a few days, then we talked and he told me that he doesn’t do anything for himself anymore and basically wants some space. We decided to go on a break but still spend a little bit of time together and try to make it work, I was kind of bitter about it but decided to try. So I packed all my stuff and moved in with a friend, we got rid of our house and he moved in with a friend too. So about 2 weeks of this, we went out for dinner a few times and so on. During this we were still in the process of moving so I was kind of emotional and pissy because that was our life we were leaving while he was so happy telling me of all this stuff he has been doing. So we kind of faded away and stopped talking to each other. One day I checked his Facebook and it said single, I was shocked so I texted him to confront him about it which ended in him saying have a good life. So another 3 weeks go by and we didn’t talk at all, and to be honest I was kind of okay with it. Then one weekend I was drunk and did what stupid drunk girls do and texted him asking him if we will ever get back together. He replied saying you need to move on, I hope nothing but the best, I want you to be happy, blah blah blah. So being really hurt from this I deleted him from Facebook and all our pics together. A few days later I texted him and asked if he would for coffee with me and I wanted to talk to him. He said he was really busy with work and he was going on a trip after, he asked what I wanted to talk about. So I told him I was so hurt that he didn’t even have courtesy to talk to me about breaking up (I basically attacked him, not my finest moment). He replied and said I let you down easy, and now your fighting with me, please stop talking to me. We haven’t talked in 3 days and I’m kind of going crazy. Oh and I signed up for plenty of fish (which is nothing but perverts btw) and I seen that he is on there, and he has looked at my profile. I just want to know if I completely ruined my chances?!
Betty
May 23, 2014 at 7:32 pm
I have on NC for 2 weeks. I notice he let grow a lazy beard, can that indicate something ? lol
admin
May 25, 2014 at 2:14 pm
Ya… hes depressed and too lazy to shave.
Madison
May 22, 2014 at 3:50 pm
Hi,
My bf and I were in a 9 year relationship. About 3 months ago he mentioned he wanted to take a break. to work on himself, or as he said to sort himself out. I of course texted called and begged everyday since. He mentioned each time I try to force the issue I am not giving him the time or space to think things through.He has agreed to meet with me then to only say hes not ready and doesn’t show up. Then a few days later will message me. I feel no contact is the only way to resolve this….any ideas or advice on why he is acting this way?
admin
May 23, 2014 at 4:03 pm
9 year relationship and no talk of marriage?