Today we’re going to talk about the 7 signs that indicate your ex is miserable without you.
At ExBoyfriend Recovery, perhaps one of the greatest things about having an audience and a message that works is that we see a variety of success stories. We get to see how our strategies work on specific types of exes.
Therefore, we meet and know a lot about the exes who are miserable without their former partner. So, today, I would like to give you 7 real life signs that we have noticed about exes who are miserable without you.
Here are the 7 signs:
- They Glorify the High Points of the Relationships
- Their Fatal Flaw is Being “Stubborn”
- They Envy Your Successes
- They Can’t Stop “Rebounding” After a Long-Term Relationship with You
- They Increase their Contact with You Significantly
- They Act Sad On Social Media
- They Become a Hermit
Now, let’s jump right in and talk about the details of each of these signs.
Sign #1: They Glorify the High Points of the Relationships
When you communicate with an ex, it’s likely that the tone, topic, and mood of the conversation will vary each time. Sometimes your ex will act kind of standoffish or indifferent about talking to you. Sometimes they will be incredibly excited to talk to you.
An ex that is extremely miserable without you will often talking positively about your relationship – in other words, they will glorify the high points of your relationship.
Now, what makes this interesting is HOW they glorify the high points.
A miserable without you ex will constantly bring up moments when you enjoyed each other’s company or did something fun together in conversation. They will say things like,
“hey, do you remember that time when we did this thing? ”
“hey do you remember that time when we did that thing?”.
They will talk about how fun a memory was and how you should do it again someday.
This is perfect example of someone who glorifies the high points of the relationship. This ex is spending a lot of time thinking about the positive parts of your relationship in their free time, so they can’t help mentioning it when they communicate with you. It’s one of the first signs that we see when it comes to exes who are miserable without you.
Sign #2: Their Fatal Flaw Is Being Too Stubborn
Often an ex who is miserable without you has a fatal flaw – they are extremely stubborn.
Let’s be honest, you are clearly the source of their misery, because they are no longer in a relationship with you.
Yet, they are too stubborn to let you know they are missing you. Some men are so stubborn that they view any kind of concession – like admitting they were wrong for breaking up with you in the first place – as a weakness.
This type of ex may not be willing to change their mind, despite their own suffering without you, without a good reason.
This is exactly why their stubbornness is a fatal flaw and the source of their misery.
So, what is the fix here?
Well, ideally, your stubborn ex would just stop being stubborn and admit they miss you and want to get back together. But that never happens, because most of the time the exes who are extremely miserable are too stubborn to make things right.
Sign #3: They Envy Your Success
On our websites, one of the big ideas that we encourage women to do is to become what we call “ungettable”.
Essentially, what becoming ungettable means is that a woman embodies what every man wants, but no man can get.
I’ve even talked about it in quite a few videos,
There are a lot of ideas, strategies, and philosophies about how a woman can become ungettable. One simple philosophy is just to create success in every aspect of your life – from your health to your wealth to your relationships with friends, family, and lovers.
We have noticed an amazing thing occur when we explain how to become ungettable to our clients and they then succeed in some way, shape, or form at becoming ungettable — their exes actually start to take notice and envy their success.
So, how do you know your ex is envying your success?
Well, quite frankly, it happens a lot on social media. Let’s say you get a big promotion at work and you post the news on social media. Then the first person to comment and like the photo is your ex. Let’s say you are super excited because you had this amazing workout and you posted this incredibly sexy picture of you working out. Then your ex is the first to comment, like, and say something. If you notice this pattern going on time and time again, it is a good sign that your ex is envying your success and they feel like they are missing out. It’s also a great sign that they are thinking a lot about you and are probably a little miserable without you.
Sign #4: They Can’t Stop Rebounding After Your Relationship
Now, I think the key words here are “long-term relationship”. If you and your ex recently ended a long-term relationship, and he’s had three or four new girlfriends that he’s slept with since, this is actually a huge sign that shows he is miserable without you.
Now, why would he be miserable?
He’s dating all these new girls and maybe even sleeping with them. Well, in truth, it’s because he has not found someone he wants to settle down with since your relationship. So, he’s just going from rebound to rebound to rebound, in an attempt to replace or distract himself from these feelings of despair since your breakup.
Now, if you’re sitting there and calling BS, I want you to sit back and listen to what I’m about to say.
The ExRecovery Team and I don’t just coach women trying to get their exes back or trying to move on from their exes, we also coach men who are trying to do the same thing.
And, what’s interesting is that many of our male clients share the common behavior of dating to distract themselves after a long-term relationship breakup.
We even had a few male clients admit they’ve slept with other people just to avoid dealing with their feelings. So, if you’re sitting there and thinking there’s no way that your ex could rebound in this way, we’ve seen it time and time again.
Trust us, if your ex is constantly going on the rebound, it could be a sign that he’s miserable without you.
Sign #5: They Increase Their Contact With You Significantly
This sign is self-explanatory, but I’ll share a few examples that you may be experiencing. Let’s say you go through a breakup and you’re not communicating with each other. Maybe you are implementing something like the “No Contact Rule”, per our advice. But, after that ends, your ex reaches out to you more and more. Before you know it, hearing from your ex becomes this consistent thing.
You start to notice not only the frequency, but the intensity of the conversation with your ex increasing.
Well, why would this be a sign that your ex is miserable without you? Well, think of the cause and effect chain that’s happening. If being away from you is making your ex miserable, then it stands to reason they are going to try to slowly but surely find a way to stop the misery. A lot of times this starts with simple communication that increases over time.
If your ex is texting you, calling you, or commenting often on your Facebook, SnapChat, or Instagram posts, it’s a sign he may be miserable without you. If you see an increase not only in the frequency, but the intensity of your ex’s communication, it’s a sign that your ex is not only miserable without you, but they are likely interested in you.
Sign #6: They Act Sad On Social Media
By now we have all seen that extremely hilarious meme about how men and women handle breakups.
At first, after a breakup, most women are extremely sad and depressed. But soon they blossom into the beautiful butterfly they were intended to be.
Men, on the other hand, are extremely excited and happy after a breakup. They think, “Yay! Ding dong the witch is dead!”.
That is, until some time has passed, and they become a depressed caterpillar.
I know, that’s kind of a weird analogy.
But perhaps the most hilarious part about the meme is the truth behind it. Yes, women often come to us immediately after their breakup. They are distraught. They are depressed. They are sad and angry. They feel all the emotions you could possibly imagine. Then, by working with us, they often blossom into a new person or feel like they moved past the breakup. Their exes, on the other hand, often experience the exact opposite.
You can often see this metamorphosis on social media sites, like Facebook.
Here’s a real-life example. Let’s say that one day you look at your ex and he’s looking pretty good. Then a few months go by and he’s gained all sorts of weight. He’s drinking and looking extremely depressed. He’s making all these mopey comments on social media about songs that have some kind of hidden meaning related to your relationship. These are great examples of men who are miserable after the breakup.
Sign #7: They Become A Hermit
Now this entire article has essentially been a masterclass on manipulation – manipulation of feelings, specifically. Now, what I do I mean by that? Well, so far, we’ve talked about your ex and the signs we often see that indicate they are miserable without you. But, like us, have you noticed the pattern?
Your ex has an extraordinary ability to distract himself or herself from their feelings for you.
It’s true that everyone responds differently to a breakup, but we have noticed that all exes who are miserable without their partner seek distraction from the pain. Some exes will eat. Some will drink. Some will rebound and sleep with a bunch of people. But, without a doubt the most common type of distraction a miserable ex will use is to withdraw and become what we’ll call a hermit.
This ex will suddenly go from being active and social to doing almost nothing. They will start to focus more inward and spend more time alone. So, if your extremely extroverted ex suddenly becomes more introverted or they have a complete change in behavior, it’s not only likely they are turning into a hermit, but it’s also an excellent sign they are extremely miserable without you.