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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
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The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
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Post categories
Amy
January 31, 2018 at 5:22 pm
Hi Rachel and Chris. I was together with my boyfriend for 4 months. It started awesome and I felt I’ve finnally found the one. At the 3 month mark we started fighting over stupid things but it seemed to never stop. We broke up and got back together a day after, I asked him to give the relationship another chance but he told me he knew it was a bad idea and we will end up breaking up again soon. The days passed and I did my best to help our relationship but he wasn’t paying too much attention to me and I know that me asking him to come back together was a bad idea because he felt that he could do anything he wanted because I would stay there with him. The days passed and we fought again around stupid things and his way to end the fight was “I think we shouldn’t date anymore, we won’t ever get along. We are so different” somehow I always talked him out of that and kept being together. A few days passed and everything was good and we fought again and he broke up with me AGAIN. I chased him and the same day told him that the best thing to do was talk things after we were calm. Inmediatly I started no contact and it has been a week and a half. I haven’t contact him neighter he has contacted me. Please help me.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 31, 2018 at 6:19 pm
Hi Amy,
check this one:
Will He Come Back If I Stop Chasing Him?
Melanie
January 29, 2018 at 8:22 am
Referring to my post just a few ago, we were together for 1 year, we know each other since 2008. We got to a point of wanting to get married and everything, just to give you some background.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 31, 2018 at 4:31 pm
HI Melanie,
Extend to a week more because nc needs to be intentional and you have to be active in improving yourself and in posting in social media.
Melanie
January 29, 2018 at 8:18 am
I was in a long dist relationship. We were very serious about each other and very in love. He fell upon heavy work stress alongside us fighting. He called it quits, next day he changed it to a break, then he broke it off 1 mo later, saying he wants us but can’t stay with me while all of this stress is going on at once. I asked if this is the end and if he is thinking of dating others, he said when the stress goes down he will want to try us again first before anyone else. This final break up was towards end of Nov, saying he wants to keep talking. He messaged me initially 3 days after the break up and from there until early Jan, once-twice a week every week. Sometimes to have a good convo, others to tell me he missed me and feel im there..aka emotional crutch maybe?, then end the convo. We were having good convos up until New years, he responded immediately to my new years text but a little dry, yet still calling me babe. He touched base 1 week later asking me how I was, where Ive been etc (since I disappeared off fb 3 days which is unlike me). So I guess he was watching my activity. We went back and forth in convo, me slowly responding to it, at times leaving a day gap in between, just to be less available to him. At one point he suggested I add messenger on my phone, Im guessing as a means for him to be able to reach me more or maybe for more availability to him? Idk, thought it was weird for him to say. All in all he was the only one initiating contact from then until jan 10 or so, with me just twice, once for new years and another to tell him a quick story. Ever since I made up an excuse not to add messenger on my phone, telling him im slowly adding apps and it overwhelms me if there are too much etc..he seemed friendly but I think his ego took a hit? Idk. For me I was angry and wanted him to realize he cant just have me whenever, he needs to make up his mind. Because he keeps flirting with me, tells me he loves me and talks about possibilities in the future, compliments me, he even woke up in the middle of the night for our anniversary to spend time with me. He still sends me hearts and all of this stuff through end of the year that is. And I got tired of being told that he s needing a break before coming back …while he, what I feel like, is stringing me along and enjoying me when he can but not committing. Idk what to do. I acted friendly but cut the convo short when he last reached out and mentioned adding messenger in there etc. I feel like he suddenly got less invested end of year, then came back for that convo just mentioned and since Jan 10…its nearing 3 weeks of no initiating convo on his end and since I never went into no contact I decided this would be it…1 more week left. This behavior is unlike him. Is he beginning to move on? Testing to see if Im still interested because I didnt take his offer to add messenger? Bruised ego because I took my time responding to each of his texts then didnt take the offer? I can’t tell. I just dont understand the sudden shift. What do you think? Who would try to find a means to talk more then talk less, I cant think of any other ideas than those. Please give some insight.
Alex
January 28, 2018 at 8:48 pm
Hey so he broke up with me after two months saying he felt sth was missing there was no spark but during the break up he tried to hug and kiss me. He also said he wanted to be friends and he doesn’t know what’s wrong all his friends are settled and I was the only one in the last year he made future plans with. He even considered going to therapy due to his divorced parents when we were breaking up but he was in a long term relationship before so maybe they were more compatible. We were righting after the break up which was on Monday and he was like how are you I am so sorry blah blah. I then did a mistake and told him to do me a favour and not reply to my messages for one month so I can get over him so I gave all the power to him…. he watches my insta stories but I stopped watching them now.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 31, 2018 at 1:10 am
Hi Alex,
That means if you’re doing nc, you have to extend to 45 days.
Morgan
January 28, 2018 at 6:39 pm
Last time I tried the no contact thing I didn’t properly read I just saw advice to not contact. So I didn’t message him for two days and he decided to meet up and get back together with me even though he’d just kicked me out of his house. He tempted me to move all my stuff back in but I didn’t want to rush into things. He wanted me to stay but I didn’t want to rush into things I stayed though as I thought he’d think I was being off if I didn’t and I liked that he wanted me around. It had been a week since he’d taken me back. We were driving back from a visit to my mums and the conversation shifted to “I can’t do this”. I couldn’t take it seriously. I broke down. That night I messaged him saying “goodbye” that I was going to hurt myself. He was with his friends. I could hear him joking in background with friends and he hung up the phone on me frustrated as he said there’s nothing he could do to help as I wouldn’t tell him where I was. We haven’t spoke for two weeks now. I don’t know what to do.
I have anxiety and have a meeting in a week time to discuss my homelessness but I want him to come with me to support me as I don’t have anyone else. I don’t know whether to ask him as he did say he’d come with me when we were together but we’re not together and he wants to be friends but I don’t want to be friend zoned if I ask him for help/meet him. I don’t want to meet him before no contact finishes either but I don’t want to leave it too late as I think we’ve split up too many times now so he’s going to move on so I’m in dilemma.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 31, 2018 at 1:05 am
HI Morgan,
Where are you living now? Because frankly, asking for help for your living situation, is going to lessen your chances of getting him back.
Belle
January 28, 2018 at 9:56 am
Hi!
My boyfriend for 10 years broke up last November 2017. We were supposed to get married this February 2018 but he became unsure of the whole marriage and us as well. We got into a series of fights until he finally told me that he doesn’t want to be with me anymore. He told me he wasn’t happy anymore and that he could not see a happy future with me. He then told me to cancel the wedding. I was so devastated that I begged him more than once to give me another chance and to try to fix things without breaking up. But he does not want to be with me anymore. We were still living together for a month after we broke up but he was so cold to me. But during the end we tried to be okay like be friends after the break up but it was do hard. He would still be romantic with me then later he would not talk to me or blame me for what is happening. I do not know why he hates me when I myself could not even blame him or hate him. I love him so much and I want to be with him. I want to start over again but he left last December. We still live in the same building but he is now with his friends. Before he left he asked me not to be engaged in any romatic relationship with anyone or have sex with anyone. He told me he would do the same until we have finally moved on. Sometimes we talk via email because we blocked each other from social media and even are numbers are blocked from each other’s phone. We have been in no contact period for 3 weeks now unless I have to remind him of his liabilities since we have some investments back home that he cannot ignore. Right now he is facing financial problems because he already paid for our wedding and he just transferred to a new flat and a lot is going on with him financially. I wanted to help but I do not want him to think I am using it as a way to get him back even though I want him back. He told me last time he is not ready to see me or even talk to me. I stopped emailing him except for the payments he has to make. But now I am just worried because I know how troubled he is. I want to help but he does not want me to help. I miss him and I want to be with him but at the same time I want to be okay and move on from all the pain.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 31, 2018 at 12:46 am
Hi Belle,
do you want to try the nc rule? You can do it while talking to him about the payments as long as it’s only about that.
Casey
January 27, 2018 at 1:12 am
My ex broke up with me a couple days after Thanksgiving 2017. I initiated it because I noticed he had been distant. I asked if he wasn’t into it anymore and he just kept saying I’m sorry…meaning yes he wasn’t into it anymore. We hugged and cried a lot and were going to talk about our relationship but he said he didn’t think he was going to change his mind. The big problem is that I want to go to medical school and he isn’t leaving where we live right now because he has a business here. I am not sure if I even want to go anymore because I really love him and want a family but everyone says I have to try. This same problem has broken us up two times now. My test is March 24th and I have been prepping but it’s hard and I don’t even know if I want to go. We haven’t spoken in 42 days. I haven’t said a word and I deleted all of my social media. I did load dating sites and I see he is on them too. Will he come back? What should I do?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 30, 2018 at 11:13 pm
Hi Casey,
You mean you still currently live together? If yes, why not you move out instead? If no, you being in medical school should be because you want it to, not because whether you have a bf or not.
Sofia
January 26, 2018 at 12:25 pm
Just wanted to tell you guys that NC and all of these methods work really well.
I got my ex back really quickly after 14 days of NC
And in total it took like 2 month (cause at first i kept texting him and didn’t know about these methods)
I got him back although we were an ldr couple and he had a rebound and had blocked me on social media
Nothing was right as you can see
I spent a lot of time on myself and met my friends,travelled with my parents etc
Eventually he figured other girls couldn’t make him happy
So don’t give up and don’t talk to him
Good Luck ~
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 29, 2018 at 11:53 am
Congratulations! Thanks for sharing Sofia!
bre
January 26, 2018 at 1:23 am
Greetings ive been in tje nc for 30 days now but last week he sends me a thumbs up emoji still unclear with what that meant and yesterday he goes to a mutual friend and acts like he dont miss me and was trying to basically pick her to see if i was talking to somebody else but je insists he didnt care… Im confused what do you think is in hos mind… I broke up with him for dishonesty and unloyalty but he acts as of he’s the victim… Smh yes im very confused
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 29, 2018 at 11:35 am
Hi Bre,
that’s common for exes.. are you doing nc to move on or to try to get him back? How active are you in improving yourself and in posting in social media?
Sarah
January 24, 2018 at 1:45 pm
So i reached out to my ex again and in our last text conversation, he even sent a double text to check on why i stopped replying after not responding for an hour. So i would say things are going in the right direction?
I need advice on what should I do next? should I keep on initiating texts to build rapport? Won’t it look like I am chasing him/interested if I keep sending him messages?
Also, one thing to note, during our relationship, we seldom spoke on the phone. We either texted or met in person. So there won’t be a progress to phone conversation stage… Also, he did mention casually during our texts that we should meet up soon. But I am not sure if he meant it as he did not follow up to set up any plans… What does that mean?
Thanks and hope to hear back soon!
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 25, 2018 at 7:43 pm
Hi Sarah,
it’s ok to initiate, what’s more important is that you’re the one ending the conversation at high point and if you’re not keen to calls before, it’s ok to jump to meet ups but that would mean you need to do a longer time building rapport in text.
Courtney
January 23, 2018 at 3:57 pm
Hey , so I am currently in my 8th day of no contact. It’s has to be the hardest thing I have done. My story is a little different .. my ex and I were on and off for 7 years. I was always the one to come back to him .. because I felt I needed him. I currently found out I was pregnant and when he found out I seen his true colours .. he turned very mean and didn’t want to talk about it and told me to get an abortion. I just realized he was never going to committ to our relationship. I have been trying for us to get a house and move on to a more committed relationship considering we have been together for sometime. He is also 50 years old and I am only 27 and he still doesn’t want to settle down… so I figured mabye no contact make him realize that he actual wants to build a life with me. He is also fairly wealthy and can be selfish and use to his freedom so I think he might be scared .. idk but no contact has been working so far .. he as sent me two emails but just breadcrumbs. Do I have a chance at making this work ?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 24, 2018 at 2:50 pm
Hi Courtney,
Are you keeping the baby? Do the nc rule for you and your baby. So, that you can start a new routine in your life, heal, improve and maintain health for your baby..
S
January 23, 2018 at 10:56 am
After NC for a month I texted him, and he said he’s sorry but he’s not there yet. Im not sure if I should give him more space or?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 24, 2018 at 1:02 pm
Hi S,
When was that?
T
January 22, 2018 at 10:15 pm
Hi, looking for some advice.
My ex broke up with me 25 days ago and I’ve been doing NC ever since. He told me we fight too much and don’t seem compatible in a relationship. We were together for 3 and a half years. A bunch of signs were pointing towards that he was seeing someone new right away…maybe even starting a few days before we broke up. Do you think he will come back? When will he start to miss me? I miss him SO much, it’s been hard.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 24, 2018 at 4:08 am
Hi T,
Check this one:
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Moves On To A New Girl (Video)
Kristen
January 22, 2018 at 7:26 pm
Hi,
I feel like I’m about to be broken up with and I could use some advice. We’ve been dating for a few months. I thought it was going really well. We have mutual friends and I have met a few of his friends. But in this past week, he has gotten really distant. He cancelled and rescheduled on our plans twice which was fine. I think he just wanted a “man cave” weekend. But then this past Saturday night, the second time he cancelled on me, he asked me if I was free today (Monday). I said I wasn’t because I’m working late and I suggested we meet tomorrow. He never texted me back. This has never happened before when I’ve asked a question in text. I don’t understand why he never responded. We haven’t talked since and its been a day and a half. I’m so upset at the sudden change. We were so happy together last weekend. I’m worried he might be pulling away. What do I do? Do I reach out? Or do I wait for him to contact me? What do I do if he doesn’t talk to me in the next few days? I feel like I’m in limbo.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 24, 2018 at 3:40 am
Hi Kristen,
How long were you dating? And by dating, you mean you’re not officially right? If yes, do you sleep with him?
Marie
January 21, 2018 at 10:57 pm
Hi,
3 weeks ago, my boyfriend and I broke up for 2 reasons: his parents wouldn’t allow him to see me (even though he’s 18) and because they convinced him that we were too different (I was too reckless and a bad influence on him). However, he disagreed with them and fought with them, but they still refused. Initially he said he still wanted to get married and have a family in the future, but he just didn’t know how to get that because of his parents. Now, he’s not sure anymore and doesn’t know what to do. Also, he wants to remain good friends, but only if I know that we probably can’t get back together, because he doesn’t want to get my hopes up and leave me hurt in the end. However, I will always have hope for us and want to get back together.
What should I do—about both him and his parents? Is there a chance for us? Also, I was wondering, do you believe in “distance makes the heart grow fonder” or “out of sight, out of mind?” It just hurts because he says our separation is starting to make his feelings already slowly go away, when mine are just growing stronger. Many people told me that initially after a break up, guys feel things less and bury their feelings, while girls are the opposite. Is this true?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 22, 2018 at 4:53 am
Hi Marie,
Check the link below and both of those sayings can be true, depending on the circumstance..and about guys feelings, it also depends.. There’s no one formula or rule for every person..
Claire
January 21, 2018 at 9:53 pm
Hi,
I was wondering how to get my boyfriend back if we broke up as a combination of 2 factors: his parents don’t allow him to see me and they convinced him that we are incompatible due to too many differences (ex. I’m too reckless, chaotic). He used to not think that but as a result of too much fighting, he now does. He still wants to be good friends, however he doesn’t want me to think that we could ever date again, as he doesn’t think so. However, we used to plan our marriage, family, etc. Initially when we broke up, he said he still wanted these things but couldn’t because of his parents. Now, he says he’s not so sure. If his parents allowed us to see each other, he said he would give us another chance in spite of our personality differences…
How do I get him back considering this complicated circumstance? Is there something I can do to win over his mom and prove to them both that I’m not too reckless? And is it bad that he told my friend that he’s already starting to get over me due to the “out of sight out of mind principle,” even if it’s only been 3 weeks? Thank you.
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 22, 2018 at 4:33 am
Hi Claire,
Check this one:
EBR 054: My Exes Mom Made Him Break Up With Me
Maya
January 21, 2018 at 9:35 pm
How do I get an LDR ex to miss me after a fight regarding a lack of communication if I gnatted him a few times after the fight and he just says he wants to left alone? It was a 5 month relationship and I’m on day 12 of NC. Also, should I do 30 or 45 days NC?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 22, 2018 at 4:28 am
Hi Maya
Check this one:
My Ex Boyfriend Thinks I’m Annoying
Maya
January 21, 2018 at 9:20 pm
How do I get an LDR ex back after a fight regarding a lack of communication if I gnatted him a few times after the fight and he just says he wants to left alone? It was a 5 month relationship and I’m on day 12 of NC. Should I do 30 or 45 days?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 22, 2018 at 4:28 am
Hi Maya
Check this one:
My Ex Boyfriend Thinks I’m Annoying
Chrissy
January 21, 2018 at 5:37 pm
Hello EBR Team,I have some question for you.Hope you will help me 🙂
I miss my ex boyfriend but he misses someone else right now.
I think he doesen`t even care about me.So what should I do in this situation when he has someone else on his mind?
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 22, 2018 at 4:05 am
Hi Chrissy,
When did you broke up? Have you done nc? If yes, how active were you in improving yourself and posting from then til now?
Marie
January 20, 2018 at 10:12 pm
Hi 🙂
I recently went to the “contact” page and left a message, but I’m note sure if it went through. Are responses to those messages sent to the email we listed? Thanks!
EBR Team Member: Amor
January 21, 2018 at 10:57 am
Hi Marie,
I don’t see your email in any other post than this..
Do you have any qurstions that I can answer here?