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365 thoughts on “EBR 024: Using Social Media To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

  1. Avatar

    Anne

    June 14, 2017 at 5:47 am

    Broke up with long sistance boyfriend 2 months ago but kept in touch as “friends”. Recentlt recieved a job oportunity near his city which made both of us happy. 3 weeks ago he writes it might not be a good idea to see each other given different values and beliefs (something he never had a problem with before). I was really sad he didnt even want to see me as a friend and decided I meeded some apace to think things through. So now, 2 weeks into nc and out of nowhere he posts some pictures of a woman on instagram. It has be crazy! Who is she? Why would he do that now?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      June 14, 2017 at 5:01 pm

      it’s probably rebound.. are you improving yourself and being active in posting in social media?

  2. Avatar

    Bryn

    June 1, 2017 at 12:22 pm

    Hi,
    My bf broke up with me after 3.5 years. Said he had fallen out of love with me and that he had been considering the breakup for a few months. Following the breakup platitudes were exchanged which I regret, and I’ve been in NC for 10 days. Have received one text from him telling me good luck for my exams and he has liked all of my FB posts (I’ve been throwing myself into new activities etc.). I would have thought that him not liking my posts meant he was angry I hadn’t responded and that I haven’t liked his posts which would be good as it shows he’s annoyed I haven’t paid attention to him. But now I think that he’s liking the posts to show he still cares and is waiting for me to be ready for a friendship. I don’t want to be friend zoned! What should I do? Any help would be amazing!!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      June 1, 2017 at 6:29 pm

      finish your nc, do at least 30 days, and keep improving while you’re slowly building rapport with him

  3. Avatar

    Peanut Butter

    May 15, 2017 at 10:23 am

    Hi! Already on my 8th day of nc when I come across my ex liking another girls updated profile picture. Does this mean anything?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 15, 2017 at 4:36 pm

      it can mean a lot of things.. maybe to make you jealous, or he just really likes that post but the bottomline is, you have to ignore it and not worry about it because it’s not going to help you

  4. Avatar

    Caro

    April 30, 2017 at 3:11 pm

    Hello!
    My bf and I broke up partly due to distance and partly due to him not being willing to commit. I did 30 days NC and he would periodically like my posts on FB and Instagram and look at my Snapchat stories. When I reached out I got a positive response and he even started intimating texts. He was dating a girl but that seems to have ended but he’s not intimating texts anymore and sometimes doesn’t reply to mine. BUT he has upped the frequency of posts he’s liking and this is across all social media platforms. He knows I’m moving to his town in a month and has even liked a post relating to that recently. I was just wondering what your advice would be for me or your thoughts on how he’s feeling towards me. We talk maybe 3 times a week right now but nothing serious and he’s never been a great texter…

    1. Avatar

      Caro

      May 1, 2017 at 10:50 pm

      Amir,
      We never really called each other. Mostly it was just texting and lots of one on one time. I was wondering what you thought of his activity on my social media. Does it align with what Chris says that he’s doing it on purpose? Does this mean that he misses me? I won’t be able to escalate to in person until I move there next month…

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 2, 2017 at 6:49 pm

      yes, it’s a good sign from him..if you dont call, and he’s not great texter but you always text, that means you have to use better topics and use ones that he always loves talking about

    3. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 1, 2017 at 10:44 am

      if you’re better in calls, transition to calls.

  5. Avatar

    Miri

    April 21, 2017 at 7:17 pm

    hey! my ex is not looking at my snapchat stories anymore, and he alwys used to open them but not anymore, also not liking my pics on Instagram, does this mean he is angry or has moved on? it has been only 9 days

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 26, 2017 at 2:10 pm

      just keep being active in posting..but do it more in sites that the post stays like Instagram and Facebook..

  6. Avatar

    Manda

    April 21, 2017 at 10:11 am

    Hi,
    So me my boyfriend broke up with me after 8 years. It’s only been like 6 weeks since we broke up . We don’t really much, and last week I just found out that he has been “hanging ” with a new girl . Which he tells everyone she is just a friend. Well once we broke up I put my social media on private. Today I wake up to see that he friend requested me. What should I do? Should I accept it ? He keep saying he wants to be my friend but I don’t know if I’m ready for that. I am still healing

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 26, 2017 at 4:45 pm

      If you’re not ready, it’s your right to take your time

  7. Avatar

    Erin

    April 1, 2017 at 3:13 am

    Chris,
    I’m using the advice and my ex is literally deleting me and telling his friends it is “because it is too hard to see me.” Is it good that he is deleting me?!?
    I haven’t posted anything too risky just drinks, and having fun with friends (no other guys or anything) and he first deleted me from Snapchat. I didn’t send him any directly, only stories, and he was watching them all. Then I posted a picture of a sunset on twitter a week later and he deleted me on twitter. What gives?
    I’m only half way through no contact and have been following the advice to a tee. Why would he be deleting me as I post stuff?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 2, 2017 at 4:41 pm

      Hi Erin,

      that’s good..that means he’s still affected by you

  8. Avatar

    An

    March 26, 2017 at 6:37 am

    Hi, im kinda confused right now.
    My ex bf just deleted all of our photos on his facebook. Does it mean that he has moved on? He no longer want to see or hear me in his life? Does it mean I have little chance to get back w him? He broke up with me 2 weeks ago.
    Im scared. And devastated. Please help me..

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 26, 2017 at 10:18 am

      Hi An,

      do you want to try the advice in the first post you commented?
      check this one too:
      How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Desire You Again

  9. Avatar

    Danielle N

    March 19, 2017 at 2:32 am

    This article covers one aspect of social media. But my question is, do I like some
    Of his photos? He only has instagram. And we follow each other. He likes all of my pics. But do like his?!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 24, 2017 at 8:27 am

      Hi Danielle,

      nope, dont like any of his posts in any platform..dont watch his snaps.. you don’t have to unfriend him..just dont engage nor react with his posts

  10. Avatar

    T

    March 18, 2017 at 12:23 am

    So what’s the strategy if you and your ex are not friends on social media? (No unfriending happened – he just doesn’t use it that often and we never bothered). Should you just post some strategic “public” photos from time to time?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 21, 2017 at 5:55 pm

      Hi T,
      continue to be active in posting..so that when he gets curious he has a lot to see..

  11. Avatar

    JJ

    March 13, 2017 at 7:29 am

    I have some photos of us on Instagram, should I delete them? He’s tagged in them as well, if that helps. It doesn’t really bother me if I keep them or not but will it bother him?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 15, 2017 at 9:23 am

      Hi JJ,

      you dont have to do that.. just keep on improving yourself and in posting in social media..why does he think it’s not going to work out?

  12. Avatar

    Anon

    January 25, 2017 at 6:16 pm

    I was doing everything right. Posting snapchats of me having fun, working out, and moving on. I also was liking other guys posts on Instagram. He contacted me asking me where I was the night before. I told him I was at a friends. He then asked if we could meet up to figure out what we are doing with some of our things (we lived together prior for 9 years). He told me he can’t follow me on social media anymore because it’s too hard for him. He’s the one who broke up with me because he doesn’t want a relationship right now. I am 99.9% sure there was no cheating. The same day he started unfollowing me. What do I do? What does this mean?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 26, 2017 at 12:09 pm

      Hi anon,

      if you replied, that means you’re not in the no contact rule period or you broke it.. Check this one:
      EBR 048: My Ex Boyfriend Unfriended Me On Facebook…. What Does It Mean?

  13. Avatar

    Catherine

    January 20, 2017 at 7:14 pm

    Hi again
    I’m not a rebound.We had been dating but I’m just insecure about her former ex. He was single for a long time and they had agreed to end things between them. They have not been in contact for two years and his former ex moved on and happy with his guy and I was happy too not until i messed.Im just insecure

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 22, 2017 at 9:21 am

      ok..then all the.more reason that you have to focus in yourself first.. Rebuild your self esteem.. If you really want to be attractive, be genuine and have standards.. be willing to lose the people that dont fit that standards insread of losing yourself

  14. Avatar

    Catherine

    January 20, 2017 at 3:58 pm

    Hi
    I have a problem. Well i need advice to know how to go about such situations when they occur.
    While i was dating my ex i noticed he used to like some of his former ex’s photos on social media.I was jealous most of the time because even after approaching him about it, he never liked my photos. I became very insecure and i still feel like he has a special place for his ex. Almost every time i brought up the conversation about being together in future he would tell me to not plan the future but live life at the moment. He would tell me of how he hoped to marry the girl he first made love to and it didn’t happen.He also told me we can’t make plans of 15 years to come at the moment and bite more than we can chew. What would you say about such a guy? I know there was so much chemistry between the two of them since they were together for 5 years and we have only been together for five months. It’s not like he didn’t love me but I just feel threatened and i hope he doesn’t live to love his ex for the rest of his life. What should i really do?
    Now we are not together anymore. I’m on no contact and implementing everything right to win his love back. I’m willing to start off as friends as i build rapport to regain his trust. Should i talk to him about some of this things and how do i avoid feeling jealous about his past?I realized he still keeps her number and photo.Can i win his heart too and influence him that much like his girlfriend? Can i get a guide on how to deal with such a situation and not messing up or overreacting? please help me

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 20, 2017 at 5:34 pm

      Hi Catherine,

      if you’re the rebound, check the link below. And also, you have to be better than the other girl.. so be active..
      EBR 034: Are YOU The Rebound For Your Ex Boyfriend?

  15. Avatar

    Amy

    January 4, 2017 at 10:55 am

    My boyfriend and I split up 2 months ago, we remained friends and still talked. But 5 days ago after he reached out to me and we had a small talk about things not related to the breakup, he stopped talking to me. He hasn’t reached out to me ever since. I posted a photo on snapchat of a pair of tickets I’ve purchased for a movie thats coming out and we promised to watch it together when it does. He has seen it, I was expecting a reply from him and asking me who I’m going with or why I’m not going with him, but he didn’t. Do you think he is annoyed by the fact or has completely moved on from me?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 6, 2017 at 6:11 am

      Hi Amy,

      what were you talking about?

  16. Avatar

    DEma

    January 2, 2017 at 9:11 am

    This guy broke up with me last summer. About to go back to college this spring. I freaked out and didn’t think I was ready to see him (we had been chatting occasionally) so I unadded him on Facebook and snapchat. Now, I’m having second thoughts because I really would like to have him as a friend. Should I wait the two weeks till I get back to school to see where he’s at? Or, should I go ahead and readd him? I think eventually I might like to date him again, but I’d like to be his friend first and foremost.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 4, 2017 at 5:27 pm

      Hi Dema,

      be friendly in person first before readding him back

  17. Avatar

    Trisha

    December 30, 2016 at 4:56 am

    My boyfriend and i broke up 10 days ago.. after 5 days of no contact he started deleting our pictures in facebook. Is he moving on already? Are my chances of getting him back low? We have had multiple breakups and this time seems to be the final one. What should i do?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 30, 2016 at 2:55 pm

  18. Avatar

    Tet

    December 22, 2016 at 8:24 am

    This is very long but pleasw bear with me. I badly need you right now and i need to tell you all the details.

    Hello Chris! I just finished your ebook!

    Ive been very depressed these past 4 days because my boyfriend of 5 years and 5 months just broke up with me. He wasnt perfect but he was a good boyfriend to me. He was a very nice man. He broke up with me because he thinks his feelings are not the same as before and said that he has been reassessing it for weeks. He told me he doesnt want to continue our relationship if he feels for me that way because it’s very unfair on my part. He told me that he liked someone in his workplace but theyre not in a relationship, he doesn’t see his future yet with that girl, he doesnt love her, but right now he likes her more than he likes me. He told me he found in her the spark we have lost when we were courting, and this idiot just wont believe me when i told him that long term relationships really experiences this.

    He told me that he wanted to fix himself so bad, alone. He has been having financial problems lately with his family, his job is not yet stable, he has no savings yet and he’s already 28, and he feels like his ego has been challenged every time he goes out with my family and my family treats him. He feels like he’s a failure.

    He told me that he stopped pursuing her(the other girl) the other week. Because he felt so bad for cheating on me. He was never the kind of person to cheat. And he can not forgive himself and he can no longer continue to fix his relationship with me because he feels like he no longer deserves me after all that he has done. That he can no longer look at me the same way because he will always feel ashamed and that I will use it against him someday. That he will be branded as that kind of man who cheats even if thats not really his personality. Thats why he wanted to fix himself.

    I still love him and every single minute, im breaking into pieces. I love him so much that i have forgiven him immediately the moment he told me everything. I wasnt even able to get mad at him that day he told me everything. I even told him to learn to forgive himself because i have already forgiven him even if i know i shouldn’t and should be mad at him but i can’t.

    I’ve been extremely devastated these past few days. I feel so rejected. I feel like he has forgotten my value. But i also know he doesn’t because he told me he feels like he wouldn’t deserve me forever for what he has done. So the other day, i went to their house because… he wanted to tell me everything. The only reasons he gave me on our first day of breakup was that he wanted to focus on himself and his family and second, his feelings are not the same. But being a good investigator that i was, i found out that he has been.. uhh im not so sure with the term.. but i know hes not yet courting her but maybe theres mutual understanding. So thats when i told him that i knew because a contact from a company where he works confirmed to me that he sees him with this girl. So he demanded that we meet so he can tell me everything because thats what i deserve. Soo he told me everything and he asked me to think about it. If i still want to continue the relationship and try, knowing that he’s feelings are no longer as strong as before plus the fact that he made a terrible mistake towards me. He even told me he only sees him a friend. Fuck that! I asked him if he will try his best, he told me there’s no assurance that his feelings will be brought back. I was extremely hurt. And i told him that i will miss him. And when i asked him if he will miss me, he said that he doesnt know. He will only know if im already gone and that in a few days of our breakup he wasnt feeling that yet.

    I am so puzzled because on our first day of breakup, he asked me that if ever he will already be fixed, if there will be any chance of us getting back together again next year? I answered, ‘maybe’ ‘idk’ and ‘we’ll see’ . Then i asked him, but what if he’s already in love with someone next year. He told me i got a point and asked me what if im the one who’ll be in love with someone by the time he realizes that the lost feelings for me are back. And he also said sorry because he told me that breaking up with me is the only way he can do to fix himself and that he can not do it if he’s committed.

    I asked him if he will pursue this girl that he wants but he told me hes not yet sure and he’ll see whatever happens.

    He has assured me that he really wanted to fix himself. I believe him but at the back of my mind, i’ve been thinking if he only said all these to get rid of me so that he can start a relationship with this girl. Although im kinda convinced that he was also very guilty of what he has done and has hated himself bevause of that and stopped pursuing rhe girl last week because he wanted to stop being the man he really wasnt(which is being a cheater). But also broke up with me because feelings arent the same anymore and cant fix things with me for now because he can no longer look at me knowing that he made that mistake.

    I woke up yesterday morning feeling so shattered. I wanted to talk with my friends but they were asleep so what i did was i messaged him and told him i was very much in pain etc. i told him i was sorry for messaging him and he told me it was okay. Then told me that maybe i should stop communicating with him because itll be harder to move on if i dont. He also said that i deserve someone better etc etc (and it hurts me because why cant he make things right and be the better man he thinks i deserve). I told him that ive beem planning to stop my communication but i messaged him because i got no one to talk to and my friends were asleep and he said he understood. But i no longer replied to his message just so he’ll be the one who has sent the last text.

    I have finished reading your ebook and i wanted to seek more advice. Your ebook was great and i am feeling better. I am thinking that if i may not be successful in getting him back, i might be successful in putting myself together. Besides, i have been meditating and deep inside i have always know that there are so many reasons why we shouldn’t be together and that maybe God is just answering my prayers to save me from future pain. But theres a big part of me that really wants him back and then i’ll decide if i want him back too only when he shows signs of wanting me back. Its just that my ego has been hurt because he has decided to end this relationship on his own. We could have prevented this if he told me that things between us have been starting to dry instead of pursuing this girl. I told him that couples in long term relationships really experience this loss of feelings but that doesn’t mean it isnt there. We just needed to spark it up. He doesn’t seem to get it! He also told me that i am the only woman he loved the most in his entire life.

    Please give me some advise… your thoughts on what i told you.. and also answer my questions please

    Questions:
    1. We dont text that much. We have different working times. He works at night and i work on normal hours. So everyday, our exchange of messages are just.. hey im home. Or im already at the office. Okay, i love you. Etc. we only see each other on sundays. But we really had an intimate and close relationship. We loved each other so much and we have already planned of marrying eavh other. We are close to each others family. His mom, dad, and siblings and I were crying like crazy when i said my goodbye to them the other day. They can not believe it! So my question is, if i stay religious with the 30 day no contact, do you think he will miss me?

    2. We never unfriended each other on facebook and instagram. We still have each other’s pictures. He asked me on our first day of break up if we can remain friends. I said yes. Is that right to answer him that way?

    3. So since i was extremely sad, my best friend gave me a chocolate and a balloon with my first name’s letter. Then my mom gave me a stuffed toy and my bro gave me a book. I was thinking if it’s okay to post all these with the caption ‘thank you’? Maybe he’ll think i have admirers? And how many days after breakup should i post that?

    4. I have always been a confident woman. So when you advised that i should be to become na UNgettable one, what more shall i do? He’s the one between us who is not so confident. I did talks on public etc etc and i have always been confident.
    Except lately when we were taking pics together and i kept on saying i looked like a trash and he told me why i kept on saying that.

    5. After 30 days of no contact, and i start sending him a text, will he think that i havent moved on with him yet and i still kept on thinking about him if out of the blue i text him i have a confession to make.. then say stuff that are not really very controversial like ( i saw this and reminded me of you etc) will it not make him cringe knowing that ive been thinking of him still?

    6. What if he greets me merry chirstmas or send me a message on facebook?
    Shall i make sure he knows i have read it nut no plans of replying, or leave the message at unopened at all)

    7. I have always taken care of myself physically in our whole 5 year relationship so i do not know what else to do. Like take care of myself more and be more attractive that how i used to be?
    I have always known im a good catch. I do not want to be arrogant but i have always been a good girlfriend to him and people have been telling me that i really am an ideal girl. (Oh gosh so sorry but i have to tell you this because you advised we have to think this way too). The people around us and I believes that he wouldnt find someone else like me.

    8. What if he doesnt miss me after 30 days of no contact. I wll extremely be devastated again. What if he’ll be busy with this girl and this 30 day NC is ineffective? What do you think?

    9. I have been currently investigating the name of this girl he was so into in their office and do you think i should pursue my investigation? Should i check the girl’s fb profile?

    10. He loved ramen! We never had ramen when were together because i wasnt a fan. Maybe only a couple of times but hes the only one who ordered. If i go out with a guy friend and i post that we are eating ramen because he convinced me do you think it will have an impact on him?

    11. He loves shoes and this adidas nmd. I can defo afford it but never bought one bevause i am thrifty. If i buy one for myself do you think he’ll be interested with the photo?

    Please help me. Pleas chris. Please
    Help me please.

    Thank you!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 27, 2016 at 9:55 am

      Hi P,

      long term relationships does lose the spark sometimes but you cant convince the other person by just telling them that’s it’s a phase. If he saw the other girl as a grass is greener case, the means the relationship probably got boring and lacked variety. Dont over think doing the no contact rule..Just do it. Dont answer if hr greets or messages, unless it’s about an important matter or emergency, and just live your life.. have your own life by having your own routine apart from him and do new things

  19. Avatar

    Vanessia Johnson

    December 20, 2016 at 12:43 am

    So my ex and I broke up two days ago exactly, he was the one who broke it off, I really like him still and care so much about him that I am trying the whole “No Contact” for 30 days. I guess my question is, is it good that on Snapchat he views my stories every single day? Trust me I haven’t talked to him whatsoever I can just see who views my things

    1. Avatar

      crystal

      December 23, 2016 at 2:23 am

      Amor, I am in a similar situation. He checks my stories so fast. I have been on/off with the NC rule-as I have tried asking him things for closure. I have been researching online a lot and some people say that him looking at snapchat stories doesn’t matter. What makes you think otherwise?

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 28, 2016 at 3:32 am

      Hi Crystal,

      there’s no guarantee that the nc rule will work, but the more you restart it, the less it can help you.. it’s good that he’s still viewing your stories.. use it as an indirect way of showing your improvements and you’ve accepted the situation..and I think you should do 45 days..

    3. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 22, 2016 at 12:48 pm

      Hi Vanessa,

      yep! it’s a good sign!

  20. Avatar

    Jenn

    December 7, 2016 at 5:14 am

    So my ex deleted our photos off Facebook after a month. Does that mean he’s over it?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 10, 2016 at 7:41 pm

      Hi Jenn,

      It depends but most of the time, not really. Check this one:
      EBR 048: My Ex Boyfriend Unfriended Me On Facebook…. What Does It Mean?

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