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2,570 thoughts on “What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You”

  1. Sharleen

    January 19, 2017 at 3:01 pm

    Hi team

    My ex has recently changed his number…we had been in contact & chatting was fine but all of a sudden his number goes straight to voicemail & no reply from texts. I’m just wondering in time & in a few weeks do you think sending him a letter would help? It’s the only way I have to contact him….

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 20, 2017 at 7:26 pm

      Hi Sharleen,
      you mean email? if it’s really the only way, then yes but if you can do social media, like fb messenger, that would be better

  2. dhib

    January 17, 2017 at 8:03 pm

    Hello Amor,
    I was blocked during no contact rule. After 30 days I started emailing and he responded well. So we started talking and texting (he completely unblocked me). 2 days ago I talked to him about getting back together. I asked for an in person meeting. He said he is ok to see me. He is ok to be a friend to me. but he does not want any relationship now. He said he is ok with his life now and he doesnt have time to spend on a relationship. I asked him to think more about it. So far we set to see each other in 2 weeks. Do you have any suggestion on how i should react and how i can convince him?
    thanks

    1. Dhib

      February 12, 2017 at 6:44 pm

      Hi there,
      well, we met and we had so much fun. we did not talk about our relationship. we just enjoyed. so we were in touch after that as well. he did not initiate any of that, but when I called or texted, he was so nice. we had our second meeting 2 days ago. we met over lunch and enjoyed a lot. at the end I ask him:”do you want to be with me again? he said no. I asked: why? dont you love me anymore? he said: “its about taking the best choice. getting back to your ex is never a good idea. I am not ready for a relationship.” so I went to terminal to come back. I missed the bus and got stuck in snow. so he suggested to sleep over. I went to his place and we slept in 2 separate rooms. in the morning he gave a ride and everything was good.
      thanks for reading. please let me know if there is still a chance.

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 13, 2017 at 11:17 pm

      for me at this point you should move on.

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 17, 2017 at 9:39 pm

      Hi Dhib,

      control your emotions, and dont ask again until you meet two weeks from now.. look your best when you meet and whatever the decision is, be as calm as you can..

  3. Pips

    January 16, 2017 at 10:06 pm

    Hello. I was in a relantionship which turned long distance (5 years total with 1,5 long distance) we would see each other everyweekend still. Unfortunately I had a very close death in my family and even after apparently being super supportive he began to say that I was very different. It reached to a point where I was feeling very alone from everybody (friends and family also), I wasn’t able to relocate to my own area and I told him I needed some space to think over. Although we spoke everyday, I could notice him being very and everyday more cold to me and I had to “force” him to admit in my face that he wanted to break up. Awful…
    He couldn’t handle with us being friends (everything I said was interpreted as being pushy, although I had said to him in a moment of anger I did not wanted to be friends with him…) so I even wrote an email/letter type. A very bad, desperate one I admit. So he blocked me on a series of plateforms like instagram, whatsapp… After a while he took them all off to ask for some tickets that we had bought to see together. I told him I wouldn’t mind giving his on person of course but he completely refused so I decided to send him the money and to go with my best friend, to enjoy myself! He did find a way to go also and even posted a revenge “i’m also here photo” lol, but he was extremely angry. Every time we would contact he would let go of the conversation easily.
    His birthday is also very close to the date it would be our aniversary so I though to myself with so many friends in common I would be seeing a lot of him, so I decidded to go search for him to block him for a few days…He had already blocked me, thinking I would try to make any kind of conversation on our anniversary??!! I went really mad with him and I outbursted through whatsapp lol on the next day he had unblocked me LOL
    Now moving on: I had the oportunity to relocate, like I/we wanted 3 months after this. So I thought that I should block him in everyway possible because I did not want him to think it was about him. So I blocked, heaven on earth, through the new years eve my friends told me how stupid it was so they made me unblock him.
    I am at that stage: if he wants, great if he doesn’t… oh well, I got a life! I’ve been talking with some friends (after the all awkward phase), posting photos of dinners/parties…and today I noticed he blocked me again! Like c’mon! I haven’t done a thing, contact him or following him even and I do not understand his mind.

    1. Pips

      May 13, 2017 at 5:18 pm

      I don’t want to seem too eager to reconnect!
      Our family was a big part of our relationship as well, for me they were already the extension of my family… I always says I know my reaction if I ever saw him again but his parents… They hit a soft spot.
      Through this time I’ve sent some texts to his mother, like holidays and I even forwarded to them some photos of my ex boyfriend I had left in my computer.
      I’m one of these people if I remember something concerning anyone, I like to send and text if they’re OK… So I would definitely be more at ease on that aspect

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 14, 2017 at 2:25 pm

      ah ok..if it’s really just friendship, it’s ok to take time on things..it’s ok to be friendly too.. if he doubts or starts being defensive, step back

    3. PipsB

      May 13, 2017 at 12:50 pm

      Hello Amour 🙂
      Hope you are well! I reached out at the beginning of April with a friendly email but got nothing in response… Later I found out he published a photo with a girl around the same time, so probability she must be his new girlfriend, going public… Bad timing lol
      As I said, my long term goal is friends, mostly because we were very present at the each other’s life’s during college and I would not like to look back with any kind of angst..
      His sister and mom’s have reached out on social media, although I’m still blocked by him via Facebook
      I accepted his sister since she lives in abroad but I’m doubtful about his mother….
      I’m happy as I am, even if still single lol I would hate to be compared :/
      What do you think I should do? I don’t know a lot of people in this situation…

    4. EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 13, 2017 at 4:27 pm

      why are you doubting his mom?

    5. PipsB

      February 22, 2017 at 12:03 pm

      Hello Amour!
      I’m writing again because I am getting a little bit restless… It’s now one year since we first parted and I’ve been dreaming a lot of him :/
      I’m thinking on trying to initiate contact again… No expectations, of course, since the probability of him answering me I think its low…
      Iniciate or resist a tiny bit more?

    6. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 22, 2017 at 11:34 pm

      if it doesn’t look like it’s not good time to initiate, don’t. It’s already been a year, maybe a little more time wouldn’t hurt.

    7. Pips

      January 20, 2017 at 12:53 am

      But probably it’s the wrong kind of feelings…
      It’s almost a year since we broke up and he still seems to do so much drama about it… of course I was super sad, super desperate but all people evolve and mature…and the way he handles this seems to bring everything to the surface every time
      So Amour, game plan? any idea?

    8. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 21, 2017 at 2:39 pm

      the best you can do, since you have no other choice too, is to ignore him. Dont beg, dont ask continue on with your life.. When he gets curious and sees your happy, it will not make sense for him to keep being angry or annoyed with yoy

    9. Pips

      January 18, 2017 at 1:29 pm

      From the beginning of last November until new years eve, and that when I told everybody I had return and I was meeting with people, parties… I guess I showed up on his feed a lot suddenly and he couldn’t handle it.
      I have also noticed a lot of of hi male friends trying to reconnect with me… And I’m not sure why
      Wouldn’t it be easier for him to delete my close friends? I have the right to enjoy my life and friends and if my happiness is that weird to him… It means I’m not indifferent?

    10. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 19, 2017 at 5:17 pm

      in a way, that’s a good sign because that means he’s still affected by you, there’s still feelings..his friends reconnecting is another sign that they are fishing info..if they ask you if you’re open on being friends with hin, say yes..

    11. Pips

      January 17, 2017 at 8:30 am

      Amour what do you think I should do? NC didn’t work obviously…
      More than boyfriend, I would love to count him as a friend again… But how?

    12. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 17, 2017 at 7:20 pm

      well how long did do nc? you said you blocked him after you moved, when was that? And besides, you dont have any other choice but to continue nc too since you’re blocked..

    13. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 16, 2017 at 10:52 pm

      Hi Pips,

      that’s still a good sign..he might have done it to prevent himself from checking you

  4. Be

    January 16, 2017 at 4:56 pm

    Hi, I have been dating this men for almost two years, we never gave each other the boyfriend/girlfriend tittle but we were together for almost two years. He started to act weird about two month ago, specially he stopped to talk to me so often but we always kept in touch. He started to fight with me about the most stupid thing ever: my dog, and how he does not like to have a dog around the house (too bad for him because my dog is staying). Last week he completely stopped to talk to my and started to put weir things on facebook about being in love, I assumed that those things wasn´t about me, I started to cry and decided that i did not wanted that kind of relationship in my life so I started NC. After a few days he contacted me asking why I deleted him from facebook, I explained but he was soooooooooo mad and told a lot of ugly things like I was immature, I had bad attitudes and that I acted childish, he blocked me from whatsapp and facebook as I tried to calmly explained why I had blocked him.
    We have been separated before, usually for common agreement, but he always, ALWAYS, search for me again after a few days. I was about to wrote him a letter trying to explain myself and trying to let things in good term but I don´t know if that is a good idea anymore. What do you think I should do?.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 16, 2017 at 9:23 pm

      Hi Be,

      do you want to do the no contact period? if you want to, don’t block him again…

  5. Sohurt90

    January 12, 2017 at 6:55 pm

    My ex and broke up 5 days ago. To start off with my ex has low self esteem. As hard for to admit I’m kinda of clingy. Despite how he feels about himself I try my best to encourage him and help find a job. We were going good( we had our up and downs for 7 months we been together. Last weekend he expressed to me that he didn’t want this relationship no more and it’s hurt to the core. I feel people opinions gotten to him with a combinations of me being clingy, his low steem and him wanting to do things on his own that led to his decision. A part of me believes that he didn’t really mean it. I said that because after a long talk we decided that we were going to talk a break and work on ourselves, but never officially breaking up. For reassurance I ask him why he wanted to give this a shot ? He said because despite everything he’s feeling he still wanted this relationship and to a certain extent he still see us growing and being together.
    Now, Monday our relationship took a huge left turn( I guess this were my clingy-ness played a role). I called him until he picked up and we spoken for a few minutes and he hang up. That’s was my last time speaking to him. I call him and text him and call him non stop. This went on until the next day when I text him again saying I accept the break up and I wanted my stuff back.
    I ask him one more time asking is this relationship is over he text back ” it over”. We agree that he going to bring me my stuff which he never did. I kept calling and texting ( I think he block my number). He went as far as to block me on FB and block even that was connected to me. He even claims now that he’s single( surprisely never change his relationship status… I think he might have forgot)
    I’m writing in because I love him and every thought him wanting to figure things out on his own maybe have been true, but I feel deep down him wanting to break up wasn’t entirely true. I think what led to his breaking point was I kept calling him like a maniac( I know I was being annoying) and him wanting his space. I don’t want to get my hopes up too high, but I have a feeling that we going to get back together because we have a bond that can’t be broken. So please HELP!

    1. Sohurt90

      February 12, 2017 at 12:12 am

      So this weekend I read the E-book and I found it very useful, but I it doesn’t explain how would one go about getting their ex back if their ex fully block them. My ex block me from everything (full block FB, Ig and phone) for little over a month and I don’t know how would I go about at least speaking to him. He still got me block on FB( I knows he lurking,but he didn’t block me since my profile is public) and idk if unblock my number…. help!

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 12, 2017 at 4:28 pm

      there’s a chance that he has unblocked your number, the only way to find out is to message him. If you are indeed full blocked, check this one:
      EBR 002: What To Do If You Have No Way Of Talking To Your Ex2015

    3. Sohurt90

      January 13, 2017 at 1:43 pm

      I’m sorry don’t understand… Are you talking about the NC rule?

    4. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 4:53 pm

      yes the no contact rule.. there’s no guarantee that it will work but you also have no better choice than toove on if you’re blocked.. And you can’t just stop talking to him..you have to improve yourself

    5. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 11:31 am

      Hi Sohurt90,

      Are you going to do the advice above?

  6. Benita

    January 12, 2017 at 4:03 pm

    Hi Team,

    Mines a really old long story dated back to 2006. I was dating this guy who was very serious about me. We were madly in love with each other, to be frank I have never loved a guy to the extent I have loved him. He had even told his parents when he was just 24 that I would be the only girl he would ever marry. But ours being an Indian society, there are some restrictions and rules. I was much more qualified than him and earning more than him, this started attributing to him being insecure about taking care of me without a good job in hand. In 2007 ,he asked me to wait for 5 years which I agreed to, but later on he said what if for some reason I wait for him for 5 years and it never happened, he would ruin my life and asked me to move on in life as he went ahead with his aim of completing his education. He had also told me he would never be telling his parents about our breakup as he never wants them to think we were never serious.
    As we lost contact I got curious so I got in touch with his mom after a month, she had no idea we had broke up. She used to talk to me very sweetly. One day his dad picked up and my ex got to know I told his mom. He yelled at me for calling his mom and telling that we broke up and that was the last we ever spoke. 2 years from then in 2010 my wedding got fixed, happened to see him online and told him the same, from his chat I could make out it hit his ego and he was hurt. Later we had a chat one more time when he joined for higher studies and I had conceived with my then husband in 2011 and he couldnt get over the fact that I was pregnant, he was too shocked to conceal it that he was not able to take it that I conceived, he was still unmarried and wasnt seeing anyone serious(got to know through a common friend). He kept asking how it happened so fast And that was the last chat we had. He had finished completing whatever he told he would do in those 5 years he had asked me to wait. He had done exactly what he told he would of finding a better job and completing his higher studies. Post the last chat, we had absolutely no contact for 5 years.
    From the beginning of 2010 until 2016, my marriage was always troubled. I had separated from my Husband in 2016, by then after a few months I had send him a casual how are you email and then later when I had gotten to know his mom passed away , I had send another condolences email. He used to always say there were only two women he respected in his life me and his mom. He never responded to both the emails.
    Got in touch with one of his friends and got to know hes still unmarried and has not been dating anyone and that he has changed to this career oriented guy who only wants to make money and progress in his career.
    This Jan 2017 I send a very honest email, telling him that I went through a bad marriage and whatever is my current situation of being a single mom whos fighting it out in the court for all the rights. I told him I had send him an email because above everything else he was always my best friend who was genuine and honest with me and someone who i felt I could be myself. I told him it would good to be friends again and if not friends atleast email friends. I also told him I apologise for my mistakes if I had hurt him in anyways and to forgive me for all of that.
    He responded finally telling me” he consciously kept me at bay, however hes feeling terribly sorry for what I went through and my current situation. He said but he has nothing to offer except empathy and that empathy would be of no use for me. He just wished me saying hope things get better.
    I replied back saying I never intended to bother him and that I respect his decision of not wanting to be in touch with me and that the only reason I send him an email was b’cus I wanted to open up to him b’cus he was the only other man I trusted apart from my dad. And I wished him well and said if he ever felt like talking about anything under the sun or wanted any help I would be there.
    After this he has blocked me on linked in and gmail. He is not on any other social media since I have known him.
    I am unable to understand why would he block me when I never forced him to talk to me and I specifically told him I respect his decision of not wanting to be in touch with me and that nobody has the right to force anything on anyone

    Please help, somebody blocking when you have not stalked or harassed someone feels awful.
    Regards,
    B

    1. Benita

      January 13, 2017 at 3:05 pm

      Dear Team,

      If hes still hurt about the past, do you think he would unblock me later when he is fine and there is a possibility of him getting back to me.

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 5:05 pm

      I think realistically, you have to start with yourself first. Dont just wait for him because that’s out of your control if he will change or not but you can control yourself. Change, improve yourself, move on without fully moving on.. If you’re like that, if he can see you have moved on and improved and he’s the only bitter one, then it wouldn’t make sense to continue being bitter… Be honest with yourself before trying to rebuild rapport..dont reach out until you’ve genuinely improved..

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 2:14 pm

      Hi Benita,

      I think he’s still hurt with what happened in the past and he’s still not open to reconciling with you as friends or he really wants you to move on because he already had.

  7. Someone

    January 11, 2017 at 8:13 pm

    Wow! Reading all of this was somewhat overwhelming, but also great in a way to finally understand how a guy thinks, so thank you! I woke up this morning to discover that I had been blocked on whatsapp on both my numbers! And about a month back I had been blocked on facebook. This situation is quite complicated though. We never dated but we definitely both had feelings for each other at some point in time. My feelings never faded but unfortunately I cant say the same for him or so I assume. We agreed we would stop talking so getting blocked on whatsapp was really quite a shock because even though I was blocked on facebook we would still chat on whatsapp. It’s all still very fresh so I’m a bit upset but I know things will get better. Better in the sense that I’ll eventually get over him. I think he wants to be left alone so I shall respect that. I always look at every aspect of life that everything happens for a reason so surely there is a blessing in this too. Once again, a good read. I think it will help in the healing process. Even if I never speak again to this guy I really do honestly wish him the best always.

    1. Someone

      January 13, 2017 at 1:27 pm

      Sometimes we may think we meant for someone when they are not. So the plan is to move on. Be alone and improve myself as a person. You don’t need a guy in your life to be happy. It’s nice to have them there but we are still complete by ourselves. So until Mr Right comes along.. the plan is to just go with the flow. I will not attempt to connect this guy in any way. If he wishes to unblock and speak to me again then the saga will continue. If someone is meant to be in your life “they will gravitate back towards you no matter how far they wander” very cheesy but very true. I believe I will get through with this type of mindset. This being said, I’m not waiting for a text or anything from him, if he it happens, then it happens.

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 4:44 pm

      ok,that’s good! 🙂

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 11:27 am

      Hi Someone,

      ok, what’s so really the goal? Do nc or move on?

  8. BT

    January 11, 2017 at 3:55 pm

    Hello,

    So I’ve been seeing one of my coworkers for about 4 months now. Seeing is the term used because we only see each other at work and in his bedroom. Nobody is aware of our relationship. When I first met him he pulled all the stops and asked me out/text often. One day he told me he was moving too quickly and needed time for himself. Which was strange because things had been going so well. I understood. He had me on FB, Instagram, and Snapchat. He removed me from Snapchat after he told me he just wanted to have a work relationship and not date. Okay that was fine. Shortly after we started seeing each other. This has been difficult because he treats me like a girlfriend in private and I see a genuine side of him. At work he is arrogant and jokes around with me, unlike his sweet side at home. It’s hard because I try to ignore him and get over him, but then he messages me to come over or gets upset when I talk to other men arrogant work. We spend the night when we see each other arrogant tend it’s not very transactional despite what it should be. I see he constantly follows his ex and unfollow her on Instagram. Just recently he removed me. Is it because he information aware I see that? Either way, he continues to go about his day like he hasn’t socially removed me. I’m not sure what to do now with him. He knows I have feelings for him but has told be he doesn’t want a relationship. Then why does he keep me around?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 9:14 am

      Hi Bt,

      because your friend with benefits.. check this:
      EBR 006: How To Turn Friends With Benefits Into A Relationship

  9. Kon

    January 10, 2017 at 8:53 am

    My ex and i just reconciled last december 18 after a breakup last october. There was an NC for amost 2 months. Now last january 2 he broke up with me again for a reason nothing has change. We had an argument and even pushing me and i pushed him too that i think the first physical attack that i made to him. After that he blocked me on facebook messenger. I wrote him saying i am sorry about what happened and i explained myself why i am not the same like the last time. I told him i am taking the relationship lightly unlike the last time that it tore me apart for 2 months.i told him i love him, he knew that i love him no matter what happened. I still want our relationship to go on but what can i do? I already done my part i already said sorry i am giving him now the space. The only social media he blocked me is messenger i want to send him message but i stop myself. I even stop posting any on my instagram or fb. What will i do now 🙁 . He message my friend that he doesnt want to see my anymore after the fight we had.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 11, 2017 at 8:54 am

      Hi Kon,

      that’s probably just because he’s angry.. if you’re going to do nc, do at least 30 days

  10. Confused

    January 5, 2017 at 12:54 am

    My boyfriend broke up with me about two weeks ago, and it wasn’t the first time that he’d said he no longer wanted a relationship with me, yet somehow we’d made it work in the past. Naturally this time I was sad and insisted he reconsider since we were both very much in love, but he refused and said he was no longer interested since to be quite frank, his insecurities and jealousy got the best of him throughout the whole 6 months we were together. About a week after, it was my birthday and he texted to congratulate me and sent me some video that he recorded where one of our songs was playing, and said something along the lines of “recognize this?”, I had just started the NC so I didn’t respond and two days later he blocked me on whatsapp. I was excited he had texted but I was set on following the NC so I didn’t try to contact him. Just yesterday, he contacted me via Facebook and texted something like “X is going to be all over you on your business trip, so congratulations you got what you wanted!” , mind you this “X” was someone that throughout our entire relationship my ex was certain I had a thing for, and was the main reason he was insecure about us. After reading his latest text I was very disappointed since I would have hoped that maybe he’d started to cool down and start to see things clearly so we could be adults about this, so once again I stuck to NC… Only this time I believe he got angrier and just unfriended me. I know he is being immature about our situation and does these things out of revenge but I would really like your take on what on earth he’s thinking or feeling, because I’m quite confused with his reactions considering he’d rather end our relationship than deal with our issues and when we’re through he doesn’t feel any better. I’m happy to say, by reading your discussions I’ve gotten clarity and it’s really helped me deal through all of this, so any input here would be a great help!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 7, 2017 at 4:09 am

      Hi Confused,

      That’s just it. He’s trying to get a reaction by doing those and those are probably emotionally done. So, it’s still a good sign because that means he still thinks of you. So, just let him be. The more you ignore,the more he realizes that his tactics is not working.

  11. riya

    January 2, 2017 at 8:36 pm

    hey everyone.
    I had a fight with my boyfrnd on 29th Dec, 2016. He was not talking to me all of a sudden, I used to initiate by calling or texting him everyday and he never called me back and on call he used to shout at me for no reason. On that night i asked him whether her loves me or not, he said that he didn’t know. I kept on asking him about his confusion and he suddenly asked me to block him by saying that I irritate him. I didn’t want to do tht but he insisted me to do that and I blocked him. But, after a few minutes I saw tht he too had blocked me. On 31st, I unblocked him and he texted me at my back by wishing me a new year and then blocked me before I could see his text. I saw his text in the morning and nd the text ws on whatsapp.
    Chris, my question is that, should I keep him blocked or should I unblock him?
    what to do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 5, 2017 at 12:26 pm

      HI Riya,

      unblock him but start the no contact rule.

  12. shan

    January 2, 2017 at 5:28 pm

    Hi Louise,

    I am handling step 1 now by replying to you.

    Our 5 month relationship had a lot of ups and downs, but we were fighting especially hard the last couple weeks of our relationship because we both felt under appreciated, frustrated, and couldn’t communicate without igniting a huge fight. Throughout the relationship I would temporarily block him to clear my head from the fights and he would try really hard to talk to me despite me asking for space, but in the end it would always be me deciding when our fights were over. I would unblock him and we would resolve most fights.

    On Dec 16 (Friday) I blocked him again at around midnight, but this time when I came around to unblocking him the next day (Sat), he said the relationship would be permanently over for a multitude of reasons. On Dec 18 (Sunday) I reached out to him again and after a bit of arguing we decided to meet up on Monday or Tuesday to finalize the breakup.

    We met up on Tuesday the 20th over wings and drinks at a restaurant. We hugged each other and sat down to start talking, and everything was fine until he asked how I was. I was honest, started tearing up, and asked if he had been talking to girls on okcupid in the last couple days. He denied it. I asked again, and he denied it. I asked a third time, and he denied it. Then I showed him screenshots of what I saw, which was him asking multiple girls to be FWB. It was highly emotional from there on out. He was furious that I snooped and told me that was why he broke up with me – because I kept getting him stressed out and etc. Somehow I was able to say stuff that calmed him down and we resumed our dinner. Almost everything would set off my tears and he would try to distract me. Towards the end, he sat down next to me, put his arm around me, and held my hand as we finished dinner. He asked if I wanted to watch a movie after and I said yes. We started to be really touchy with each other. During the movie, we were even more touchy, and he told me he loved me a lot and didn’t want me out of his life. We left the movie early to talk in the car and hook up some more. This is when he proposed we go on a break instead of break up, and he wanted space until Jan 15. His end goal was to have me be in his life as a life long friend, even if we weren’t together. He said maybe we’re not super great as a couple but this break is the only thing we haven’t tried, so maybe we could take space and see if it helps the relationship. If not, we could be life long friends, and he wasn’t going to date anyone for at least a couple years. He asked if we could still talk during the break and I said it’s best not to, to which he agreed. Then I asked if we would see other people during this break and he said he’d rather focus on himself, but he might talk to girls here and there, so I told him I planned to go out with someone he knew one time (Andy). He said he couldn’t blame me if I moved on during the break as much as he didn’t want me to, said he couldn’t stop me from going out, and agreed when I said I wouldn’t be physically intimate with anyone. He requested I tell him every time I go on a date with someone. We hugged and kissed and said our goodbyes.

    Three days later I met Andy for the first time and we played arcade games/ate/had drinks. I posted a picture of the drinks on my snapchat, and my ex saw. He was also following my locations via the Find My Friends app on iphone, and towards the end of my date he started accusing me of being physically intimate. We got into an argument so I called him he yelled at me some more, then I explained myself and he calmed down a little. He asked if we could be in an open relationship. I asked if it was so he could see other people, and he said no, but he did say he was in the mood for extreme sexual encounters. He said the open relationship would be so he wouldn’t stress out when I went out to see other people, but I said I would stop once our break is over. I said I didn’t want an open relationship and just wanted a break so that we could eventually get back together. Then I revealed that I found more stuff on his okcupid and asked if he was seriously not talking to other people, and he became furious again. He changed his okcupid password and told me to stop snooping. We argued some more. I forget how the fight ended but it wasn’t completely resolved and he was definitely still angry the next day. That phone call lasted 4 hours, until around 5AM. The next day I snooped on his email in the afternoon and found a bunch of nudes of one girl. I called him immediately under the guise of asking how he was feeling, but he was still really angry still about me snooping the night before and didn’t want to talk to me until Jan 15. I didn’t bring up the nudes that I found in his email.

    Three days later again, I was still really upset about the nudes and obsessively checked his emails. I started to get angry that he was upset when I’ve been completely upfront and honest, but he was caught in lies and still vehemently denied everything but had the audacity to be upset at me. I checked his instagram and saw that he recently started following girls that he used to sext before we got together, liking all their pictures and probably snapchatting them. I made a fake snapchat account and added him as a friend, then he immediately started asking me for sexts. He sent me pictures that were previously taken and sent to somebody else beforehand, so I knew he was sexting other girls too. I messaged him nonchalantly saying that I planned to go out with Andy again, plus a new guy that he didn’t like (as per his request) He texted back with fury and couldn’t believe I was going out with these people when all he wanted was a break so we could both have solo time for ourselves.He said I was completely abusing the break. I asked if he was sexting others and he said no. I asked him to send me screenshots of his recent snapchats and he did, but deleted all his conversations with girls before doing so. He also deleted my fake snapchat account from his list. I told him I knew he was hiding them (without revealing that I was the fake snapchat account) and he got even more mad, saying I was delusional and stupid and totally wrong about everything. He said he didn’t love me anymore among other hurtful things, chalking it up to him being hurt over me dating others etc. He said he still hasn’t gotten the space he wanted. I forgot how that conversation ended but I think we still decided to speak on Jan 15. He said we probably weren’t going to get back together but we could talk anyway.

    I knew he was following my stories on snapchat so I started posting stuff about my anger, like memes of liars being liars and saying general stuff about being betrayed but not saying his name. After two days of snapchat posting, I checked his instagram account and saw that he started following one girl that caused our relationships problems at the very beginning. In the first two months of dating we were browsing his computer when imessages popped up, and revealed that he was still calling her babe with nudes and sexts on the day that I met his parents. At the time he said it was a time stamp error on imessages. But I knew he was talking to girls up until the day we decided to be in a relationship, so I’m not sure who to trust on that one. Anyway he started following her on instagram and I absolutely lost it. I texted him saying please remove me from your life and don’t speak to me on Jan 15. He said “sure, you’re honestly a bitch and a dick for putting me on blast on snapchat for three days and publicizing shit, talking to everyone about me, honestly I hate you for it”. I asked how he could do this to someone he cared about. He again screenshotted me that he wasn’t following her (but I know he has two instagram accounts), and said it would be the last time he “proves” himself to me. He said he didn’t love me anymore, didn’t want to talk to me anymore, hoped I would be happy that he’s not in my life anymore, and he blocked my number + snapchat.

    A couple days later I posted a story on instagram and he saw it. I saw he reactivated his kik account (possibly more sext mediums?) and hacked his account. The chat logs were cleared but again I saw another girl he claimed to stop talking to many months ago, named Adri. The next day I posted a selfie on and he saw it. He then blocked me off instagram.

    So I think he blocked me because:
    1. He thinks I’m annoying because I haven’t given him space
    2. He feels guilty for his behavior and doesn’t want me to keep checking on him
    3. He doesn’t want to be reminded of me

    What’re the chances we talk on Jan 15? Is there any way I an fix the relationship?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 5, 2017 at 6:46 am

      Hi Shan,

      the most common reason for an ex to block is because they good annoyed.. if he’s guilty, he would probably keep talking to you.. it’s less likely that he would want to talk that soon but it’s better if you don’t talk too

  13. Confused and lost

    January 2, 2017 at 10:49 am

    Hello Amor,
    I’ve wrote in before and you’ve really helped, so would really appreciate your help again please!
    My ex broke up with me 7/8 months ago after a year due to cultural and religious differences, we are both in our mid twenties. We tried to remain friends but it did not work, partly because of me still harbouring feelings and him wanting to date other people. I was soon blocked and we did not speak for two months, he then got back in touch and we had been speaking frequently as friends however he would not agree to meet up. (I should also mention that during this time, he also blocked me for a week again for some minor reason). Recently however he said that he could overlook the cultural/religious differences and give it a go once again. I obviously was delighted because my feelings had not really ever faded, in hindsight I should have made it a lot more difficult and played more hard to get. Anyway he initiated to meet but didn’t follow up, so the following week i decided to initiate it instead. We met up and ended up kissing but it left me more confused about where things were going, as it seemed like i was the one initiating things all the time. I question where we stood and his answer was that you should just feel these things. I then initiated us meeting again, he agreed but he refused everyplace i suggested. I text him the day before we were meant to meet up, and asked if we were still on i got no reply, the day came and i text him and got nothing. He called me later in the day to explain he had hardly any battery and was out. My response was that he needed to work on his communication and it would have made it easier for me if he just text me to let me know this, he told me that this was just how he is like and he’s like this with everyone. After this he didn’t contact me for a week, I called him and he said he wanted to take back everything he said and didn’t want to try again due to all the questions and communicating and proceeded to tell me how it was the new year and hung up. I went a bit crazy and called two times after to which he rejected my calls and sent him text saying that it was wrong for him to be on and off when he felt like it, knowing how i felt. I know I partly let this happen as i should have played harder to get and not been so available. I feel really dissatisfied with the answers he gave me and want to know clearly why he wanted to try and gave up so easily. Do you think I should implement the 30 day rule? (I’m probably blocked anyway knowing him) or do you think this is the end of the road?
    any advice would be helpful!
    thank you

    1. Confused and lost

      January 25, 2017 at 10:32 pm

      Hello Amor,
      So I had a weak few moments! I made the mistake of calling him one week in of NC (he blanked my call) and sent him a request on a game to which he declined. So I’ve started again and I’ve had time to regroup myself and now I’m thinking the best way to contact him again in a few weeks. Whenever we have stopped speaking before, we would reconnect by phone calls not through texting (he’s not good at responding to texts). But now I feel a type of call him and i know he won’t respond properly to texts like mentioned above. Should I try a game app invite or is that too weird? thankk you!

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 26, 2017 at 12:33 pm

    3. Confused

      January 10, 2017 at 2:54 pm

      Thank you for your advise and I hear what you’re saying! I also sent in this question again to you with the same name (confused) but worded differently because my phone wouldn’t update itself until now so please ignore that one! Thank you again, appreciate your time!

    4. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 11, 2017 at 10:17 am

      Ok, I’ll erase it. Thank you and you’re welcome!

    5. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 5, 2017 at 6:03 am

      Hi Confused and lost,

      frankly, you dont have the right to demand how he acts with you because he’s not your boyfriend, even if he knows your feelings. So, that’s what needs to change first.. if you want to try for the last time, let time pass..maybe 45 days beforr being friendly again

  14. Jen

    December 31, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    Hi, I kind of have a complicated story. My ex and I have been broken up for a few months because I moved. He was upset because I started having an intimate relationship with someone else after a few weeks. I came home for Christmas and we agreed to meetup, we ended up sleeping together and got in an argument the next day because I was sad that he had no more feelings, but he said he did care about me. A few days later I texted him and asked him if I could return his things and he told me he didn’t want to see me again and that we could be friends sometime in the future. Last night when I was drinking I texted him confronting him about sleeping with girls who are my sisters age, then he told me he was embarrassed that he slept with me and blocked me on Facebook and instagram. I haven’t tried texting him so I’m not sure if he blocked my number too. Do you think there is anyway of us being civil again or friends? I’ve accepted that he doesn’t want a relationship right now, but his actions and what people tell me he is doing really hurt. If I try and talk to him again, when should I and how would I go about it? I’d like to be friends before I decide if I want to be with him or not.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 1, 2017 at 7:13 pm

      Hi Jen,

      give it 30 or 45 of no contact before slowly rebuilding rapport as friends

  15. Discouraged

    December 31, 2016 at 2:14 pm

    My ex and I were on and off for 7 years are longest break up was 5 months and I had implemented ex boyfriend recovery and got him back. 6 months later he breaks it off with me again I initiated no contact at that moment one because I was blocked as well. 2 months after the break up he contacts me and everything seems amazing he unblocked me but didn’t add me on anything just texted me. He’s contacting me telling me he misses me and how he can’t wait to move in with me out last conversation like this was a week ago. Just yesterday I saw a video posted by one of his friends where he was holding some girl around her waist and had his head nestled into her neck. I immediately felt crushed! I still do but I didn’t contact him and we talk to each other every few days so I’m just trying to grasp everything is this girl a rebound is she just to fill the void because I’m not there. I actually am moving just a few minutes away from him in a few weeks for school. Moving wasn’t intentional it was necessary for school. At this points I really do want to just cry and yell at him since I feel I was led on we were talking for about a month and a half after he contacted me about moving in. All of our pictures together he deleted aside from one video of us I fell as if I’m just trying to find some hope in this but it completely lost….please help.

    1. Discouraged

      January 1, 2017 at 8:53 pm

      How can I practice this he contacted me today saying he wanted to drop off some clothes I left at his house when we were together. Do I offer to give his stuff back as well or just ignore this…this really does feel like he’s over me…

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 4, 2017 at 3:11 pm

      it’s ok to talk about the things, as long it’s only about those things..

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 1, 2017 at 7:00 pm

      Hi Discouraged,
      I think it’s time you take a different step. He knows how much you feel about him, so he doesn’t value it. No matter how many times you break up, no matter what he does, you’ll take him back. So, this time instead of feeling like being treated less than what you deserve, treat yourself with importance by letting go of people like him. practice your standards by walking away to people who are below it.

  16. Rafaelle

    December 29, 2016 at 11:42 pm

    Hi Chris,

    I had an intimate sexual relationship with a guy for 3 months. We were so loving but he didnt want marriage so I agreed hoping that he will change his mind later when it gets more intimate and when we know each other however he dumped me two months ago suddenly saying that we wont commit anyways so no need to stay together anymore!!!! I cried and pleaded to give me a reason why after we agreed that he changed his mind. I asked if he is gonna commit to another girl he said no and i knew he wasnt lying. However he kept me on facebook after the break up for 1 month and a half. I followed ur advice step by step and had a new amazing look, implemented no contact and showed him how much am so happy! But suddenly removed me!!! I didnt contact him after that and I found out Am still not blocked on whatsapp. He is a kind if a man who has issues with his ego. Please dont tell me to move on and forget him. First i wanna know why did he unfriend me and second I wanna know how to get him to contact me coz he refused any kind of contact. Its been 2 months we r not talking to each other.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 30, 2016 at 2:40 pm

      Hi Rafaelle,

      I’m nit going to give you false hopes.. dont be desperate.. first, you used sex to try to make him commit, which is devaluing yourself. Now, you’re going obsessive on him. Dont. listen to this one:
      What To Do When Things With Your Ex Don’t Go According To Plan (With Christine Hassler)

  17. Dee

    December 29, 2016 at 2:38 pm

    My ex had me blocked on FB since September. He unblocked me a couple days ago. I am trying not to over analyze it. A couple weeks ago we said some really harsh things to each other. I later apologized and he did too. Now that I’m unblocked I did peek at his page which is still private but I’m sure he has looked at mine. He wants to be friends and I think this is his way of keeping the line of communication open. I don’t know.

    1. Dee

      January 2, 2017 at 11:08 pm

      I tried but he doesn’t want to. He is seeing someone else but told me he wishes that he could rewind things and we never broke up but he can’t go back into a relationship with me. I am ok with him moving on but I do still have feelings for him and want him back in my life. I don’t know if unblocking me is him being over it (he wants to be friends) or him “checking up” on me. I think it is a good sign but I can’t hold my breath. He is still seeing the new girl and isn’t trying to get me back.

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 5, 2017 at 1:00 pm

      what do you mean that he doesn’t want to? you asked him directly? If he has a girlfriend, of course he wouldn’t say he want you back, so, the way to that is to still build rapport and attraction but it would be slower and longer than usual.

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 30, 2016 at 11:33 am

      Well, that’s good. Are you thinking about trying again?

  18. T

    December 28, 2016 at 4:44 pm

    I really need some advice.was married to a cheater for 20 years.met up with a old friend of his 6 years ago.i have been divorced 6years.we had an instant connection but I moved to be with him 3 times Everytime I went back I had to help my ex. Which then this guy would say horrible things in texts.but one of us would end up getting ahold of each other. Mind u in those 6 years he has blocked me from Facebook then unblock give me his number then block me again. So I’m here wanting to be with him once again we talked about marriage for 6 years. He came down where I lived 3 years ago and stayed at a friend of mine because I lived with my ex for financial reasons and also I had a 7 year old at the time. So I stayed the night at my friend’s house with him nothing happened we just talked and he planned on moving there and surprising me.well my ex came looking for me and I shoved him in my friends bathroom and left with my ex. Why I don’t know was told I broke his heart from my friend for three years he has stayed in contact with my friend and off an on with me. He came down one more time but I couldn’t see him but for a few hours because I had to go to work in morn.so 6 months ago he contacted me again and told me he still loved me and he’s hurt because he will never see me again.told me he would marry me if I came back. So 4 months ago I came back and have seen him only 3 times he always says he’s busy and likes to be ready with everything before he sees me.i texted him a few days ago and told him that I felt like I was a booty call and he blocked me. My question is was he hurting or is he just playing a game with me.im really hurt I don’t understand why he keeps doing this too me for 6years. Is he just playing a game or does he think I will run back to ex again. Which I won’t because I do really love this guy and why would he play a game with me for 6years is it revenge or is he hurt . Need advice please

    1. T

      December 30, 2016 at 6:49 pm

      But what if he is just hurt . Do u think he might be scared knowing I could go back to x or is he an asshole and could careless. Why do u think he would play me for 6 years does not make any sense. I know I hurt him but I feel I have been punished for too long. And why would he say he wanted to marry me but when I got here he doesn’t act it.wtf gives oh and he drinks alot. Is it all out of hurt and anger or some kind of revenge. You talked about moving on. I tried that I was living with my x husband we were having sex nothing else. Before u judge me I already know it was wrong but I shared my life for about 30 years with my xhus and I could not get over this guy nomatter what I did . WTF is wrong with me. I did try and move on any other advice lol

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 31, 2016 at 10:20 am

      If he has been like that with you in 6 years, would staying make him change? Let’s you’re not going to move on, but being the same, staying in the same situation just sends him a message that you’re ok with everything. That even if you say you’re tired, you’re still staying, so, why would he commit?

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 30, 2016 at 7:03 am

      Hi T,

      Move on. 6 years is too long to let somebody treat you that way.. Whatever his reasons are, stop allowing him by moving on from him..

  19. dm

    December 27, 2016 at 6:27 pm

    Hey,
    I was blocked after the breakup through the applications and phone. After one month of no contact rule, I emailed him and wished him to have great holidays. He replied and wished me the same. Should I now ask him to unblock me as we can get into a causal friendship? and when should I reply back? after a day or a week?
    Thanks!

    1. Dm

      December 29, 2016 at 7:14 pm

      hi.
      yes I did after a day. he is on vacation so I asked for a photo from a special monument that I like, he then replied kindly and said sure.
      I am still blocked, however. I really do not know the next step!
      thanks

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 30, 2016 at 12:46 pm

      I think the only option for now is to use email in talking to him

    3. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 29, 2016 at 3:51 pm

      Hi Dm,

      did you reply? what did you say?

  20. Makayla

    December 27, 2016 at 2:59 pm

    So my boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago, and he started talking to one of his exes from a year ago and two weeks after he contacted me and started texting me like we did when we dated for about a week while he was also texting his other ex, I think he wanted to get back together at that time. Then he told me he was leery because he heard things about me, and I asked what he heard but he wouldn’t tell me and then just stopped talking to me all together. So a couple of days ago, my friend is good friends with my ex, and she was telling me how he had told her to tell me to stop “hoe-ing” around because I text a lot of guys. I have guy friends but I dont think I text a lot of them. Anyways I asked him about it and he said I would have never known if someone didn’t show me… I’m not sure what anyone would have shown him, but i told him that that’s all not true and I’ve told him all the guys I’ve ever been with. So the next day I posted a picture of my sister and I, and he liked my picture on instagram, I didn’t say anything or text him anymore. But then the night after that he totally blocked me on Snapchat when I haven’t texted him since the time about the “me being a hoe thing”. And he still does text his other ex. Idk I just want to get him back but I honestly have no clue what to do anymore, and I don’t text him ever it was only the one time.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 29, 2016 at 12:01 pm

      Hi Makayla

      if he trusts you, he should know you’re not like that.. and if you are going to do the no contact rule, be active in improving yourself

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