One of the most popular questions I get on this site is “how do I get my ex boyfriend back after a year apart?” It’s an interesting question. I will admit that so far every single page I have created for this site has been geared towards women who are wanting their boyfriends back almost immediately post-breakup. The truth of the matter is that time plays a very significant role in the type of strategies you can employ to get your ex back. So, the strategies that I outline on my super guide to getting your boyfriend back won’t necessarily work for women who are a year removed from a breakup.

What This Page Is About?

Every time I write a page for this website I have one major goal, to create the best free page in the world on the topic I am writing about. Admittedly, some pages on this website are better than others but in all, I feel I do a pretty decent job of providing value that is very rare in this day and age. For this particular page I am going to try to go as in-depth as possible. Fair warning though, there may be some sections on this page that don’t seem like I am going in-depth or they may seem like I am cutting a corner, I am not. In those specific cases I am simply going to be linking to a larger guide that can explain the concept better than I can on this page.

Alright, now that we have the formalities out of the way, what exactly is this page about?

Well, this page is going to give you an exact step by step method to getting your ex boyfriend back but ONLY if you have been apart for a year or more. It is important that if you have not been apart for at least a year that you go to my guide detailing how to get your ex boyfriend back here.

Of course, even the page I link to above can’t cover everything that needs to be covered. Getting an ex back is such a complex task that there is literally an infinite amount of possibilities that can occur. If you are looking for something more, something that can lay out a game plan for you to follow then I highly recommend checking out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.

Different Set Of Rules

New rules

The first thing you need to realize about trying to get an ex back after this amount of time is that an entirely different set of rules have to be implemented for you to even have a chance. The whole game has changed. A lot of time has passed, he may have dated new people, you have probably dated new people and both of you are mostly over the initial heartbreak of the breakup. What you really have to determine is why you want your ex back?

Now, I am not saying this to call you into question, I am doing this to help you. As much as I want you to get your ex back you have to come to terms with the fact that sometimes two people just aren’t right for each other and are better off staying apart. That is why I need you to be completely honest with yourself. What is your reasoning for wanting your ex back? Do you just miss them? Do you think you can’t live without them? Because, I am sorry to say but reasons like that aren’t going to be good enough. You need to have a truly legitimate reason for wanting to get back together. Your reason needs to be so good that it is worth getting them back. Here are a few examples of reasons that are “legit.”

Good Reasons For Getting Your Ex Back

  • You broke up on a whim (impulsively)
  • You broke up because of a fight (and it was the only fight you had)
  • You were both truly happy together for most of the relationship (Most = 75%)
  • You both want the same things out of life together.

No, No Contact?

If you have spent any time looking around this site then I am sure by now you have realized that I am a huge fan of the no contact rule. Almost every page on this site mentions it.

Heck, I even talk about it in my books:

Why?

Because that is how important I feel it is and while I am mentioning it, yet again, it is for an entirely different reason. The no contact rule won’t really work in this specific case (getting an ex back after a year (or more) apart.) Why won’t it work? Well, unless you have texted, called or emailed your ex throughout the entire year you have been apart then you will have already done your own version of no contact.

The no contact rule is as much about timing as it is about cutting your ex off after a breakup. For example, if I was dating you (don’t get too excited 😉 ) and we broke up then implementing the no contact rule immediately after the breakup would be an effective tactic because of the timing. You are going to be fresh on my mind and I am going to be eager to talk to you again after NC of course. However, it is an entirely different situation after a year has passed and the timing is no longer there for the NC.

So, what are you supposed to do?

Well, we are going to get to that but first I think it is important if I address a burning question that I think everyone is going to be wandering.

Is It Too Late?

never late

No, it is never too late to get your ex boyfriend back. Women seem to be under the impression that as more time goes by, their chances of being able to successfully get their ex boyfriend back drop. While that may be true in some cases I think overall there are quite a few advantages to being “late.” The first thing that you need to realize is that guys are always thinking about their exes. Heck, I still even think about my ex from FIVE YEARS ago. However, I would say that the biggest advantage is the fact that you have a history with this person (hopefully a good one.) Your goal is to use your history with your ex to bring up romantic feelings in him.

The best way I can describe this phenomenon to you is like this. Have you ever heard a really good song? Something that just makes you groove to the beat. Have you ever wondered why you react that way? My theory is that the particular song did a good job of touching your emotional center in turn, making you feel something. I have often found that my favorite songs are weird choices that bring up certain feelings within me. Some make me happy, some make me excited and others make calm.

Now, can you imagine saying something to your ex that can have this same effect on him? THAT IS WHAT WE ARE TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH!

You Need To Look The Part

look the part

I talk a lot about “looking the part” in my book, Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.

I want to take a step back and talk a little about the no contact rule, more specifically, the only part of the no contact rule that you absolutely have to use. I am just going to make a general assumption here and say that while you are really wanting your ex back you haven’t seen him in person in quite some time. If that is the case, then I need you to do something. I need you to become the sexiest version of yourself as possible.

Why?

Because, I want the first time that your ex sees you to be special. I want him to look across the room and have his heart stop. I want him to think “wow, I made a mistake leaving her.” In essence, you have to look the part of someone who successfully got over the breakup and is better than ever. I suggest you do the following things:

  • Hit the gym (get in the best shape of your life)
  • Update your wardrobe
  • Get a new haircut
  • Start eating healthier
  • Take care of any skin problems (acne, etc)
  • Take care of your teeth (not smiling more I mean dental work if you need it.)

You Need To Feel The Part

feel

Looking good, while certainly helpful, isn’t going to get you the result you want to get by itself. Remember what Arnold said, when you look good, you feel good and when you feel good you do good ;). Ok, ok, that was pretty goofy but he was right about one thing, you need to feel confident, so confident, in fact, that you won’t need to feel that you need your ex boyfriend back at all. I know it sounds crazy but guys are attracted to women that don’t want them. It’s pretty simple actually.

Have you ever heard a guy call a girl a (expletive) because she didn’t like him? Let me break down what is really going on here. The guy isn’t really angry at the girl for not liking him. He is actually angry because he feels insecure about himself because he wants the girl so bad but can’t get her. So, instead of doing the healthy thing and accepting that fact he decides to call her a name. The end lesson here: the guy really wanted the girl, badly.

Alright, so you know how important it is for you to achieve a feeling of (you not needing to be with your ex). The question now becomes how exactly do you do that? Prepare yourself because I have another list for you to go through.

  • Accept the fact that there is a chance that you may not get your ex back (once you accept this you can live a more stress free life.)
  • Focus on work. Sometimes it is ok to work a lot to get your mind off progressing things with your ex.
  • Go out with your friends, a lot!

What, When And How To Contact Your Ex

Now we are getting to the good stuff huh? Just like the no contact rule, things are a bit different when it comes to contacting your ex after a year (or more) apart. However, before I talk about the differences let me tell you about one thing that hasn’t changed,  what you use to contact your ex. In my mind, having someone who you haven’t spoken to in a very long time contact you, seemingly out of the blue, can be a little awkward. In my opinion, the best way to combat this awkwardness is to use text messaging. It’s personal, quiet and the social norm now-a-days. If you still need some convincing on why this is the best way to contact your ex I suggest you check out this page.

Now, before I move on I do feel it is important to mention that in this section I have one big goal for you and it is not to get your ex boyfriend back. WAIT! WHAT?

While getting your ex back is the real “objective” in order to do that you are going to have to meet with him in person. My goal for this particular section is getting you in a position where you can do just that, meet with him in person. So, I am trying to get you to go on a date with him. Hopefully, if everything goes according to plan you won’t even have to suggest a date, he will.

Texting Strategy

I am going to level with you…

I don’t do a great job of covering everything you need to know about texting an ex boyfriend on this page.

Why?

Because there simply isn’t enough time or room for that.

Heck, I even wrote a book about it. That’s where I would recommend for you to go if you want a more in-depth look at the in’s and outs of texting.

The big difference between the normal version of getting your ex back and the one where you have been apart for a year really occurs here. You see, I usually recommend breaking the ice with a simple “remember when” text. Basically, it is an interesting text that will cause your ex boyfriend to remember a good memory (with you in it.) You can usually get a gauge on how interested he is based on the response. However, the “remember when” text really only works well if you are a few months past the breakup.

So, what do you do then?

Well, you are going to have to initiate a conversation, the only question is, what is the best way to do so? First, it is important that you establish a few ground rules when texting.

Texting Ground Rules

  • No one word texts like “hey” “sup” “hi” (each text has to have substance and depth. I always like to say that your text has to be so good it’s impossible not to respond.)
  • YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO END THE CONVERSATION. (Ok, “always” is a bit strong but do your best to be the one to end the conversation.)
  • You can not get angry, no matter how angry he makes you.
  • Keep your texts positive and pleasant.
  • Don’t text back immediately.

How To Initiate The Conversation

Initiating a conversation with your ex doesn’t have to be as hard as some women make it out to be. I have created three simple rules for you when it comes to the first text you send. If your text doesn’t meet these three rules then I would not send it because chances are, you are not going to be able to establish a conversation thread with your ex.

  1. The first text has to have substance behind it BUT it cannot be too long.
  2. You have to put yourself in your exes position and determine what he would think if this text was sent to him out of the blue. (happy, creeped out, angry?)
  3. You cannot ask your ex out to dinner/hangout/etc.

Alright, so what I am going to do now is give you a (positive) example text and break it down using the three rules I have established above.

text

There are a couple of things to notice here. First off, notice how polite and simple the text is. Jane (our imaginary girl) sent a sweet text that clearly stated she was wondering about her ex, Jason. Now, if you were wondering where I came up with this text message then look no further from my real life. After I graduated high school I went to a local community college. Upon my first day I received a text from an ex girlfriend saying something very similar to the text above. If you are wondering how effective this text was let me tell you that the breakup that we experienced was real nasty. Horrible name calling, vouching to never see each other again, you get the picture. Well, even after all that I was ecstatic to hear from her. I almost got up from my desk, at college, and ran up and down the halls. So, this text can be very effective. The key component to it’s working though is that time has had to have gone by, a lot of time. Lets take a look at how this text stacks up to the “3 rules” we have created.

1. The first text has to have substance behind it BUT it cannot be too long.

This is a perfect text by this rule. It explains very sweetly that the guy has been on a girls mind a lot (guys love to feel wanted) and it seems very genuine. Notice though, how the length doesn’t border on the insane. Not much else to say on this front. Lets move on to rule number 2.

2. You have to put yourself in your exes position and determine what he would think if this text was sent to him out of the blue. (happy, creeped out, angry?)

Lets assume that this imaginary couple above had a really nasty breakup. However, over a year has ended so the emotional heartbreak has died down and for the most part, both parties have moved on. How would the ex boyfriend react to a text, out of the blue? Well, I can only speak for myself but I personally love it when I get texts out of the blue like this. Besides, I basically give you the inside scoop on how I came up with this text (the story above about my ex and I.)

3. You cannot ask your ex out to dinner/hangout/etc.

This is pretty simple, the point of this text isn’t to ask your ex out to a date, it’s to simply start a conversation and prove that YOU control the thread. This leads me to my next point.

Always Always Always Be The One To End The Conversation

cut thread

Every time a conversation is started a thread is created. It is up to you to control that thread. How do you control the thread? Simple, you have to be the one to decide when it ends. Almost every girl that I have pursued unsuccessfully tend to have a certain trend. Why am I telling you about girls that I have failed to get? I think it’s important for me to explain how crazy I went because I couldn’t get them, which only made me want them even more. After a while, I began to notice that these girls weren’t the prettiest, they weren’t the smartest they just knew how to control the thread of a conversation.

Stop for a moment and take that in, these girls held ultimate power over me not because they were the most beautiful, or the smartest but because they knew how to control the thread. Alright, I know you are getting eager to know exactly how they were able to control the thread. It’s quite simple really.

First, they would start a conversation and get me hooked

For this to work they had to get me hooked in a conversation. They would respond to my texts, I would respond to theirs, it was a nice flow.

Secondly, right before our conversation was about to hit the climax they would bow out.

If you have read my other guide on getting an ex boyfriend back I suggest that you be the one to end the conversation with a simple, “Hey, I have to do xyz I will catch you later.” While you are in control conversation doing that, it is the polite way of ending the conversation. If you want some real power, simply cut the thread and never respond. This is advantageous for a couple of reasons.

  1. You will make (whoever you are talking to) absolutely crazy (it made me crazy) and it will make you more wanted.
  2. You establish that you are in control of the thread. Instead of you chasing your boyfriend he will be put in a position where HE has to chase you.

Quick recap:

  • Send a sweet, short text message.
  • Get your ex hooked on a conversation.
  • Bow out of the conversation (essentially cutting the thread)

Wait, There’s More!

So, those are the basics but doing the tactic above won’t get your ex back for you alone. You are going to have to do a lot more. Think of it this way, while you want to be in control of the conversation thread at all times, you also want your ex to feel the feelings he felt about you (the positive ones) when you were dating. The tactic above simply opens up a dialogue and gets you in a position where you can slowly but surely send text messages to remind him of how he once felt about you. Now, I am going to shorten this section and link to one that explains those tactics in detail: how to get your ex back with text messages.

Three’s A Pattern

Texting is nice and all, but the real goal here is to go on an actual date with your ex boyfriend. Here is the thing though, it is easy to get one date. I can call a girl up right now and say “hey, would you like to go out for some coffee?” I would count that as a date. So, my challenge to you is simple, rather than go on one date with your ex boyfriend, go on three.

Three dates equals a pattern and it means your ex has genuine interest in reuniting. Now, how do you get the date with your ex? Well, if you are smart about your texting communication HE WILL ASK YOU. Of course, every single guy is different. Some guys are really shy and won’t ask you out on a date even though they really want to. It is up to you to gauge the situation and figure out if the signs are there that your ex still wants you back. In the case that your ex doesn’t ask you out on a date I recommend calling and asking for one. I explain in detail how to do this at the bottom of this page.

491 thoughts on “Getting Him Back After A Year (Or More) Apart”

  1. Avatar

    Mridula kore

    August 26, 2019 at 6:16 am

    My ex and I broke up more than a year ago. We had a great relationship when we were physically together but things started to get rocky after I moved to another city. We would still meet once in a month (which was awesome) , but the arguments increased and had mostly become full of jealousy or possessiveness and ego. We obviously missed each other a lot, but I started to fall out and eventually broke it off with him, in the heat of my new life. He was there for me, for a long time, but I just chose not to see it.
    Now, almost a year later, I’m at a place where I realized how amazing we both were together, and I can’t help but miss him every single day. He’s moved on, and is probably seeing someone. I contacted him and apologized for everything about a month ago. 2 days ago I texted him a memory of us and he told me not to send him these things. He says he has forgiven and forgotten and is seeing someone.

    Inspite of all this, deep down I have a feeling that it’s only because I disappointed him so much. What we had was insanely good and ended insanely nasty. So much time has passed and I want to correct everything. Is there any way anything could happen?

  2. Avatar

    Mridula kore

    August 26, 2019 at 6:13 am

    My ex and I broke up more than a year ago. We had a great relationship when we were physically together but things started to get rocky after I moved to another city. We would still meet once in a month (which was awesome) , but the arguments increased and had mostly become full of jealousy or possessiveness and ego. We obviously missed each other a lot, but I started to fall out and eventually broke it off with him, in the heat of my new life. He was there for me, for a long time, but I just chose not to see it.
    Now, almost a year later, I’m at a place where I realized how amazing we both were together, and I can’t help but miss him every single day. He’s moved on, and is probably seeing someone. I contacted him and apologized for everything about a month ago. 2 days ago I texted him a memory of us and he told me not to send him these things. He says he has forgiven and forgotten and is seeing someone.

    Inspite of all this, deep down I have a feeling that it’s only because I disappointed him so much. What we had was insanely good and ended insanely nasty. So much time has passed and I want to correct everything. Please help me out.

  3. Avatar

    Cindy

    August 18, 2019 at 5:03 pm

    Read the book “the script of life – manifest your ex back”. You’re welcome

  4. Avatar

    desire

    May 11, 2019 at 7:20 pm

    my international distance ex and i had a messy break up over the phone. I believe i argued with him too much and became needy with high expectations and he finally exploded and wanted out. In a year and a half of being in LDR, we met twice a year for average a month or 2 each and we traveled to many countries and had fun exploring together. He broke my heart and i said mean,ego crushing words to him. We didnt talk or meet for a year+ now. That was once i reached out after 60 days of no contact but he din reply. Will he ever reach out to me or we are completely done?

  5. Avatar

    Linda

    February 4, 2019 at 9:17 am

    Me and my bf broke up last year in February. We tried to make it work again, took a break for 6 weeks but he cut it off in May, saying we will never see each other again. I purchased your book and did everything in order to heal. I was happy person. He reached out in august, first I ignored him, he contacted me again, we talked for one day and I stopped replying. One month later he wrote me again and we were in touch almost every day for 3,5 months. We met in November, had a dinner together, talked, kissed and slept together. He kept talking to me snd and wanted to see me again. I panicked and asked him what this is going to be about cause I realized I still love him. He said he doesn’t wanna relationship but we can stay friends, also with benefits. I was mad, didn’t reply. He reached out again, asking about how I am and so. He asked me out for a coffee and cake. He was very nice and told me he would like to stay in touch cause he enjoys my presence and talking to me. I said no, cause I knew seeing him would be painful. We didn’t talk fpr one month. I wished him happy bday and he replied couple days later. We started to talk again, decided to go for a dinner. Then we went to his place, cuddled a lot, there was some kissing but no sex. we casually texted for next two weeks, flirting a bit. We met again. This time we slept together, he was very nervous and it was really nice. He said he would like to go to exhibition and swimming with me, he offered to help me wirh some stuff at home, cause I needed a help wirh new furniture. He actually checked what we need and told me need to buy some stuff. It felt very good to have this normal talk with him. But afterwards He didn’t text me or anything, so I reached out and he was friendly, now we text like every 2-3 days, but only short messages. He seems cold. I would like to try to get hin back, all the negative memories are forgotten, we always laugh together, talk about nice part of our relationship, and I know I need to spend more time with him in order to make new memories. He already said I am different and better, and that I have made a lot of positive changes. I wanna take it slow but dunno how exactly I should proceed. Any advice?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      February 4, 2019 at 5:20 pm

      Hi Linda!

      Thanks for sharing your story. I can see you have been thru a lot. I think you are right about taking it slow and seeking to create positive moments and memories.

  6. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 2, 2018 at 2:19 pm

    Hi, my husband and I are in the process for divorce and we just had a baby. He placed a protection order for me for one year because he thinks I am a danger for our son and we can only have email contact. We begin to contact things just regarding house and kid recently. We can’t have other communication except email. I am in the process of counseling too. Do you have any suggestions? Thanks

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 2, 2018 at 5:02 pm

      You should be proud of yourself for exploring the counseling route. So many of us all would be more informed and in a better place emotionally if we could talk to someone trained to listen and guide. Just think in terms of little steps as you take all this in.

  7. Avatar

    Sinh

    October 21, 2018 at 5:52 am

    Me and my ex broke up about a year ago. But since a year, we have been in contact, sometimes we have talked daily whereas sometimes we didnt talk for about a week. We tried giving it a try but he didnt put in any efforts and it failed. Things have been up sometimes or down. 3 months ago, he was with another girl. He apologized and I gave him a chance. But he was rude and took me for granted. He still talks to his ex. I gave him multiple chances but he just doesnt put in any efforts. He said he cant give me any commitment now because he is not ready. I also asked him to stop talking to his ex, but he didnt agree. Even if I dont contact him for a week, he doesnt mind and never initiates a contact, nor does it feel like he is interested in talking. I’m tired of all this. But I’m not able to move on. I have tried no contact multiple times, but always failed due to various reasons. We had a 2 year long tight relationship with no issues. He says he will give me the commitment but at the right time. I wonder if he is just stringing me along. Its been a year. And after all the hurt and cheating he has done, I want him to come back by himself, apologize. But he has big ego and also is a narcissist. He avoids talking to me because he thinks there will be an argument. I havent totally healed ftom the heartbreak and cheating. We have been broken up for a year now but I havent implemented no contact. So now should I go for no contact or should I talk to him with an ungettable girl attitude and spread positive vibes so that he attracts. What will make him chase me? Please help.

  8. Avatar

    Ann

    September 25, 2018 at 9:57 pm

    Thanks so much for quick reply ,you think I may be in with a shot to get my ex back if I follow you recovery plan ? Thanks again Ann

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 26, 2018 at 12:06 am

      It really is about doing things in a sensible, yet strategic way to better your chances. I have seen far worst cases, so yes, if you apply yourself and soak up as much info as you can, you can raise your chances and be proud you tried your best. But my program is also about your personal recovery and get into that in detail as well.

  9. Avatar

    Ann

    September 24, 2018 at 7:58 am

    Hi ,my long distance ex bf and I split up 9 months ago ,one day he said he loved me and the 3 days later I got ghosted . A mutual friend told me that my ex bf father and split from his mum so he had had to go home and take care of his mum so my ex bf had said the distance between us was to hard . I heard he had met someone new for a few months but it wasn’t serious . 2 months ago I messaged asking how he was and he said he wanted to be friends and we had some flirty friendly texts but then I became a text Knat and he stopped replying . I want to get back with him and am prepared to move to where he lives if that’s what he wants . I’m not blocked and he still follows me in social media . Is he still interested and what do I do to get him back ? Many thanks in advance

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 25, 2018 at 3:01 am

      Hi Ann!

      I know being ghosted hurts. Do you have a ex recovery plan? Use my site and my resources here to help. And don’t beat yourself up for being a text gnat. It happens to us all in trying times. Just learn from it!

  10. Avatar

    Grace

    August 6, 2018 at 9:23 pm

    What if u seen him several times and u slept together and he is still hot and cold and says negative things all the time.

    So what do l do?

  11. Avatar

    G

    July 29, 2018 at 3:12 pm

    What if ur ex bf, is texting u short answers. Has seen u several times last time we were together and he knows l still love him. When were together he shows signs he care and calls me by my Nick name but next day could short talk and if l don’t text he’ll textv3 to 4 days later.

    What do l do? It drives me crazy and last time he seen my confidence drop. I’m afraid it is only for sex but l really don’t know.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      July 29, 2018 at 3:25 pm

      Hi G!

      So a lot guys will be brief in their text replies as a way to keep his emotions in check. We need to get your confidence levels back up. Are you utilizing any kind of game plan. Go to my home page and you will see all kinds of tools and solutions, and eBooks that you really should tap into to have an organized game plan.

  12. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 30, 2017 at 11:54 pm

    This is in response to the question “what was our form of No Contact”. Sorry, I don’t see a reply to comment space. Now to the response….. We work together, so I could never go literally 30 days without crossing paths with him at some point, so when I would pass him in the hall, I’d say “hi”, but not chat with him. Other than saying hi, I would not speak to him at all. No texts, no phonecalls.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 31, 2017 at 8:09 pm

      ok, that’s good but how much did you improve yourself? And aside from following the advice on how to win an ex who is with someone else, check this one top:
      EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

  13. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 28, 2017 at 9:47 pm

    Amanda

    December 28, 2017 at 5:17 pm

    Hey Chris,

    I need your help about getting my ex back. He and I broke up 4 years ago. We had a solid foundation of friendship before we started dating. We started dating, but after a year and a half, he broke up with me. It wasn’t a nasty, ugly breakup, there was no fighting, we both just had too much emotional baggage at the time and we both knew that we were not in the right mind frame to fully support a long term, serious relationship. We’ve remained good friends over the time that we’ve broken up, and have hung out one-on-one many times since we broke up as well. We’ve both gone on dates with other people, but there was never anything serious with those people. The chemistry and attraction has always been there, as well as the feelings that we have for each other. Definitely on my end, and I believe on his end as well, as he’s still very protective over me, he still calls me by the pet name he’s called me since we started dating, he’s said that he can see himself with me, etc. We have done our own form of the no contact thing. After doing the no contact, it’s seemed several times that it could be heading towards reconcilliation, but then it phases out again. I want my ex back because I feel like we’ve both grown as people since we broke up and that we’re over the emotional baggage that we brought into the relationship before. We still have that chemistry, we still have that emotional attachment, there was really no fighting during the relationship, and I feel like we could be great if we got back together. The problem now is that 4 months ago, he began a relationship with a new girl (he’s 33, she’s 22, I’m 33). For 1 month of their relationship she was out of the country for a trip overseas, and during another 2 weeks he was away visiting family. I’d like to know how I can get him back. She’s a nice girl, but I don’t think they are well suited for each other and I don’t foresee it ending well. I feel deep down that if we were to give us another shot, it could work out phenomenally. Or at least to know the odds of me being able to me successful in getting him back.

    Thanks in advance for any advice you have!!!

    EBR Team Member: Amor

    December 28, 2017 at 7:25 pm

    Hi Amanda,

    describe your own form of nc. How did you do it?

    I went about 45 days/6 weeks of no phone calls/text messages. He and I work together, so there were times where we’d pass each other in the halls at work, but I never said more than “hi” when walking passed him. Other than the word “hi” when walking into work, I wouldn’t speak with him during the no contact period.

  14. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 28, 2017 at 5:17 pm

    Hey Chris,

    I need your help about getting my ex back. He and I broke up 4 years ago. We had a solid foundation of friendship before we started dating. We started dating, but after a year and a half, he broke up with me. It wasn’t a nasty, ugly breakup, there was no fighting, we both just had too much emotional baggage at the time and we both knew that we were not in the right mind frame to fully support a long term, serious relationship. We’ve remained good friends over the time that we’ve broken up, and have hung out one-on-one many times since we broke up as well. We’ve both gone on dates with other people, but there was never anything serious with those people. The chemistry and attraction has always been there, as well as the feelings that we have for each other. Definitely on my end, and I believe on his end as well, as he’s still very protective over me, he still calls me by the pet name he’s called me since we started dating, he’s said that he can see himself with me, etc. We have done our own form of the no contact thing. After doing the no contact, it’s seemed several times that it could be heading towards reconcilliation, but then it phases out again. I want my ex back because I feel like we’ve both grown as people since we broke up and that we’re over the emotional baggage that we brought into the relationship before. We still have that chemistry, we still have that emotional attachment, there was really no fighting during the relationship, and I feel like we could be great if we got back together. The problem now is that 4 months ago, he began a relationship with a new girl (he’s 33, she’s 22, I’m 33). For 1 month of their relationship she was out of the country for a trip overseas, and during another 2 weeks he was away visiting family. I’d like to know how I can get him back. She’s a nice girl, but I don’t think they are well suited for each other and I don’t foresee it ending well. I feel deep down that if we were to give us another shot, it could work out phenomenally. Or at least to know the odds of me being able to me successful in getting him back.

    Thanks in advance for any advice you have!!!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 28, 2017 at 7:25 pm

      Hi Amanda,

      describe your own form of nc. How did you do it?

  15. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 28, 2017 at 8:44 am

    I should also add, that there is quite a large age difference between he and his new girlfriend (he’s 33, she just turned 22). He and I are the same age.

  16. Avatar

    Amanda

    December 28, 2017 at 8:42 am

    Hey there. My question has a bit of a long story attached to it. So my ex and I dated about 4 years ago. We had a solid foundation of friendship before we ever started dating and after a year and a half, he broke up with me. It wasn’t a nasty, ugly, breakup, neither one of us were in a good mind frame to make a serious relationship work, and we both knew it. He was just the one to pull the trigger on the relationship before I got the chance to. We’ve remained friends since we broke up, but there has also been those times where we would start talking again, hang out with each other, it would seem like things were heading back to getting back together, and then it would phase out again. We’ve always had that old chemistry and attraction to each other since the break up, and there are those old feelings left there. Definitely on my end, pretty sure it’s the same with him as he’s still very protective of me, refers to me by the pet name he started calling me back when we started dating, etc. I really want to give things another shot with him as a lot of time has passed, and I believe we’ve moved passed the emotional baggage that we both brought into the relationship. He’s always said he could see us together. The problem is, now he recently got a girlfriend, and I don’t know how to get him back. We’ve spoken since he started dating this other girl, and all of the responses have been positive. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!

  17. Avatar

    Amaia

    November 28, 2017 at 7:29 pm

    Is that good that we’ve been talking that much though?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 29, 2017 at 2:45 pm

      If you kept in continuos contact without nc, you’re more likely yo be friendzoned

  18. Avatar

    K

    November 28, 2017 at 4:42 am

    Yes but why though? can i still send him the “how have you been”text above after it’s been six months since the last time we talked? it will be over a year since the break up at that point. And it turned out he didn’t block me.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 29, 2017 at 1:56 pm

      More likely sometimes he gets curious..if you’re moving on then uou shouldn’t talk to him anymore.. But of course of course we can’t stop you if you’re going to

  19. Avatar

    Amaia

    November 27, 2017 at 11:48 pm

    Is that good though if we’ve ben in strong contact since the split?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 29, 2017 at 1:26 pm

      If you kept in continuos contact without nc, you’re more likely yo be friendzoned

  20. Avatar

    k

    November 26, 2017 at 3:27 am

    Hi, So I was commenting here a lot and kind of disappeared oneday, Sorry! So here is what happened after that. I came to the states and i let him know that i was here and ever since then he started to initiate the contact and flirt and wanted to see me. So i flew out to where he lives and we saw each other and had dinner. We didn’t have the “talk” though. He was supposed to go on a business trip for a month the next day. And after that night he’s been cold. I tried to make a conversation and he would be just cold to me. so one day i insisted we talk on the phone and I said ” after i saw you i was hoping we could have the talk, but because you were not very responsive i think id rather not talk to you ever again” and he said “yeah..maybe thats best for both of us. We’re just going so different ways in our live” and then he wanted to hang up so he could go to bed. And later on i accidentally saw his snapchat story where assumingly he was sharing a dish with someone. and that evening I blocked him on Instagram. What was weird was he blocked me back that night which means he’s been stalking me here and there because otherwise how would he have known that i blocked him. Anyways Ive done NCs too many times and its been almost a year since the breakup and a month since the last time we talked(which didn’t go very well). So whats my game plan here??? Thank you!!!!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 28, 2017 at 1:51 am

      Hi K,
      that means you need to move on.

1 2 3 10

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.