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Post categories
Jess
September 7, 2016 at 2:56 am
I am currently 3 weeks into NC and my ex has not contacted me. He was the one who ended the relationship, but constantly second-guessed his decision the entire time. When I initiated NC, I thanked him for his phone call but told him I needed some space, in a warm and classy way. He seemed very friendly and eager to hear back from me and, with several smiley faces, told me he completely understood and to reach out in the future if I ever wanted to.
He has not reached out at all since then, which is out of character since he reached out the last time I told him I wanted space. I have been seeing old friends and posting lots of fun pictures on Facebook, and as soon as I started doing this he withdrew completely on his profile and went dead silent. It seems quite strange and not like him at all. Why would he react like this?
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 8, 2016 at 7:44 am
Hi Jess,
maybe he’s respecting your space and avoiding getting hurt by seeing your posts.
Anonna
September 6, 2016 at 4:53 am
Wait, so what does one write in the text messages after NC is completed???
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 7, 2016 at 6:28 am
Hi Anonna,
Click this guide for that.
Texting An Ex Boyfriend (The New Rules)
Marie
September 5, 2016 at 4:13 pm
My ex and I ended things last month. I last talked to him on the 14th and have implemented NC since. While he hasn’t messaged or called, he has liked my fb status 3 times. Does that look promising? Or does he have to contact you via text or phone call? Thanks.
Marie
September 6, 2016 at 3:23 pm
No, I don’t plan on breaking NC. I meant is it were only a good sign on his part if he text or called? Are his FB likes a good sign that he misses me/is thinking about me?
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 7, 2016 at 8:49 am
that’s good.. Yes it’s a good sign
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 6, 2016 at 2:29 pm
Hi Marie,
it’s a good sign but what did you mean that he has to text or call you? Did you mean were the likes good enough for you to break nc?
Holly
September 4, 2016 at 12:17 pm
Hi
Thank you for such an informative website, it’s such a comfort. I would love some advice please. My ex and I split recently as we both agreed we wanted different things moving forward. Toward the end he became a bit distant and didn’t read my last messages before deleting the app and not returning to pick the messages up (as they could be retrieved later and I can see he hasn’t looked at them) I called him because I didn’t want our last communication to be via text and he commented we are so different. I still have lots of feelings for him. I would love some advice as if you think it’s worth going with no contact in the hope he will want want to talk again and maybe try and work things out? He was always so keen and at the beginning-said he wanted to grow old with me. I feel so lost but I’m trying to stay positive. Thanks so much.
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 5, 2016 at 2:41 pm
Hi Holly,
it’s not a guarantee that no contact will work but I think it’s better than to keep trying on contacting him if he’s not responding.
Ayesha
September 4, 2016 at 6:45 am
Hi
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend since One year and two months.. We had so much love present in our relationship, but recently he got his university results and started telling he wont be able to fulfill anything for me, my dreams and etc etc. But i have been really much supportive and told him that I have always wanted his love and nothing else (he already know it though). Its been 15 days he is not talking at all, and in a week it’s my birthday. I don’t know if he will wish me or if he would atleast meet me for that day.
I have even send him a message last week telling him that I was looking at our previous photos and videos.. I called him and he didn’t pick up my calls. And then I decided to implement the No Contact Rule for 30 days to see if he would contact me to see if he really misses me.
What should I do? I still love him, and misses him almost everyday.
Ayesha
September 8, 2016 at 3:09 pm
Thank you Amor for your reply..
He called me at 2 a.m today.. I was really surprised to see him calling me at this hour. After 2 weeks. He was silent and I felt like he was crying maybe. I told him “you have been able to miss me finally” , and he said sorry. I asked him if he loves me, in a polite way, he said “A lot ayesha”. We didn’t talk for long, only for 6 minutes. And he said he would call me today, but he didn’t.
I’m lost a bit 😡 what should i do actually?
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 9, 2016 at 3:27 pm
well that’s good that he’s missing you.. I think you talked again by now.. i hope he asked you back
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 5, 2016 at 12:29 am
Hi Ayesha,
That’s good that you’re in no contact now but you have to do it properly.. It’s not about just stopping to contact him and waiting for him. It’s about healing and changing yourself. You need to focus on that, that if he greets you on your birthday or asks you out, you will ignore him.
YOu need to read this articles:
EBR 017: The Importance Of The No Contact Rule
Stage 5 Clinger – Getting A Boyfriend Back If You Were Too Clingy
The Ungettable Girl
Ivy
August 30, 2016 at 9:02 pm
Hi! First, I love your website!! I have almost completed my NC, 9 more days to go.. but I am starting to get cold feets. What if he doesn’t care anymore? What if he doesn’t want anything to do with me when I contact him? What if he is just… over me? He broke up with me telling me he met someone else he wanted to date. I am just scared to contact him if he has zero interest in talking with me, but I really want to text him.
EBR Team Member: Amor
August 31, 2016 at 2:23 pm
Hi Ivy,
So, he’s in a grass is greener case? Read this article: The Grass is Greener Syndrome For Ex Boyfriends
Violet
August 25, 2016 at 5:55 am
Hi,
My ex and I broke up a month ago and since the day we broke up I made no contact with him Whatsoever. I read your articles about not making any contact, but does NC work if my ex is with someone else? There were a lot of factors for our break up and I know my ex was interested in someone else because I found the photos of this other girl on his phone when we were still together ( literally hours before breaking up). I just don’t know if he even misses me or if he has completely moved on, it’s been almost 45 days. I’m not sure what to do at this point…
Lola
September 8, 2016 at 2:45 am
There was no link, can you try reposting please
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 8, 2016 at 3:13 pm
oh it was misplaced.. Sorry! it’s the what to do if your ex boyfriend moves on to a new girl video at the first sentence.
Violet
September 5, 2016 at 3:53 pm
Sorry not sure if you got my reply…
Physically I’ve lost a little weight, otherwise I don’t think of him as much as I use too. But of course I still think of him and day dream of us getting back together. I’m also in school and will attempt to make new friends and try new hobbies to stay busy. I’d also love to go on a few dates to see what I do and don’t want in a relationship. I just want to make sure I that I don’t only want my ex back because I like the idea of having someone in my life. I guess not much has really changed with me yet since I’ve yet to experience new friends, relationships or activities.
EBR Team Member: Amor
September 6, 2016 at 2:28 pm
sorry for What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Moves On To A New Girl (Video)the late reply Violet. That’s good. Maintain that. You have to friendly only when you initiate contact again so that he won’t avoid you because once he senses that you’re doing it to get him back, he might become protective of his new relationship. Start slowly. If you bump into him say hi. And you need to listen to this to understand more of what I’m talking about :
Lola
August 30, 2016 at 3:06 am
Physically I’ve lost a little weight, otherwise I don’t think of him as much as I use too. But of course I still think of him and day dream of us getting back together. I’m also in school and will attempt to make new friends and try new hobbies to stay busy. I’d also love to go on a few dates to see what I do and don’t want in a relationship. I just want to make sure I that I don’t only want my ex back because I like the idea of having someone in my life. I guess not much has really changed with me yet since I’ve yet to experience new friends, relationships or activities.
EBR Team Member: Amor
August 29, 2016 at 12:24 pm
Hi Violet,
Looks like a grass is greener case.. How much have you improved since the break up? And read this article too: The Grass is Greener Syndrome For Ex Boyfriends
Enigma
July 24, 2016 at 12:48 am
I tried NC for 30 days. My boyfriend and I were together for six months. My ex-boyfriend didn’t reach out to me during NC. I finally gathered courage to text him as guided after NC and indeed got a positive response. I sent a second text after 2 days and he responded with a question asking what I wanted to share. After my response he didn’t get back to me. I waited a week and then sent another casual text. He hasn’t responded to that one either. I am wondering if his first text was a pity text and if he doesn’t want any further communication. Is there any chance of us getting back together? I am loosing all the hope.
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 26, 2016 at 5:11 pm
Hi Enigma,
what was the topic about in yiur last text? if it’s interesting for him but he still didn’t reply, that means the next attemp should either be two weeks or one month after and you have to still be active even after nc especially in those times to establish you’re not chasing, have your own life and that you’re just being friendly
Sarah
July 23, 2016 at 4:49 am
Need Advice !!!!!!!
I had met this guy online (let’s say his name is Chad) Chad and I were talking online for a good 2 weeks til we decided to meet up. Chad was in the air force and he just moved were I had lived and I happened to leave by the base so we were really close by each other. (Beginning of April) Our first date was amazing and I felt like we really connected. He would text me every morning and night telling me how beautiful I am and that he couldn’t stop thinking about me etc. Now at the time I was still a virgin , never kissed a guy and never had a boyfriend before and I let him know about all this on the first date.The 2nd or 3rd date he gave me my first kiss. We had deep conversations about our past and i comforted him while he cried in my arms. So the 5th or 6th time we hung out I started going to his dorm for oral. So that went on for awhile and most of the time we hung out that would happen. We went to the movies and i tried to break things off in the car but he asked why? N i couldnt think of the reason why so i just said nevermind . At the beginning of may things were good I felt like I was a good gf I would draw him nice pictures(I’m an artist) and buy him things for ex. He told me he wanted a sticker for his car and I got him one of his favorite skateboard brand. But after that he would say how he is so busy so he would stop by for a little then leave. So I felt like he was losing interest because he wouldn’t reply to my message after I asked him if he wanted to hang out on a certain day. And it would take him like a day or two to text me back so I texted him saying I wanted to break up. He didn’t text back til 4 days later saying sorry that he has been busy and that he never been good with relationships and if we could still be friends and hangout. So I didn’t text him back because I didn’t want to stay friends. Later I texted him asking for my Wii which I had left over his house and he would tell me that he would bring it over a certain day and then don’t.. so I told him to bring it over whenever and leave it on the porch. One day I was home and he told me he was bringing it over which he did and we talked for awhile he asked me how I was doing and asked me about things that were going on in my life then he complemented my hair and try to give me a hug. After that about 4-5 days later I text him telling him that I kinda missed him a little n he said he misses me . So we ended up hanging out again but we were suppose to just stay friends but the night didn’t end that way so we got back together around May 21 .Everything was going good again. In June I told him that I wanted to be serious with him if I was going to give him my virginity blah blah. So he agreed . The next time I saw him he had a couple tatted on his arm but he told me he was getting a ship there. He asked me if I liked it n what did I think about it . We had went out to eat n it was nice I told him I was planning on get a job were I had to work everyday 5pm-3am He didn’t want me to get it. June 12-june 15 We didn’t talk much he texted me saying sorry we didn’t talk much his mom was down. I felt like he still could of texted me back or something ..so more days had past with no text so I sent him a sexy snap n he texted back so quickly. so I was upset with him about that and told him how I felt in a long message (not this long of course) but I let it go. So he texted me June 20 telling me happy birthday n when we could hang out n I told him I forgot to tell him I got the job n I’m only off on Sundays so he texted me Saturday asking how I’m doing . we planned to hangout Sunday but I ended up having to work at my other job.(I had two at the time). We had not hung out in a month but we would still text . I tried asking him if he wanted to take a break because we both are working so much that we didn’t have time for each other n I was getting so emotionally distresseded. He never texted me back on that so I apologize n he said its okay meanwhile this is the beginning of July and we were still talking but still haven’t hung out til the very beginning of june. I asked him if he wanted to go to a drakes concert with me n my friends in August I also told him I’m going to stop working at this job the beginning of August so he was like he would love to. So days go by and he text me at 12am wondering if I’m awake n I replied he kept saying he really wants to see me so I asked him when the next time he is off n he says Tuesday n Wednesday so maybe we could hangout between then. so I told him we could hangout 10am-3pm cause I work at 5 pm tuesday n Wednesday and that I should be off Sunday n he never texted me back about that so Wednesday (i quit my job n I texted him asking if he wanted to hangout Friday (he was off) . He asked if I’m off Friday n I told him yes . He read my message Thursday and hadn’t texted me back .So Friday comes along …no text so I ended up hanging out with my friend that day and so I saw that he viewed my Snapchat story. So I was confused y he would beg to see me but when I’m off he blows me off. So 3 days later still no text so I blocked him on Snapchat n Facebook . so now its been about a week and a half with NC but he is not texting or anything ( I wasn’t sure of the aftertaste so I pretty much gave you the whole scenario of our 3 month relationship)
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 23, 2016 at 2:00 pm
hi Sarah,
it’s been back and forth.. so stay strong in no contact.. it looks like you’re not clingy type because you’re busy with work and you have friends you can ask out.. you just need to meet new people now.. you should do at least 30 days
Anna
July 22, 2016 at 9:19 pm
Hi. I have been reading the site after I broke up with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. However, I think I found the info too late! I was so frustrated at my ex that I told him not to contact me ever again, and two days later I found out about the NC rule ugh! Does it still count as no contact if I told him to not talk to me again? Or will he take my word and just leave me alone and move on? A little bit of background: we loved each other, had a great and happy relationship, we were not even fighting. The reason I broke up with him was because we couldn’t agree on marriage, he may have commitment issues about marriage, not about settling down with me though. He wanted to move in together to “see where things go” while I think the reason you move in together is because you have a desire to marry eventually.
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 23, 2016 at 10:02 am
Hi Anna,
ues, you can still do nc..but I think you can do just two weeks because it looks like that’s just a misunderstanding that you can settle calmly
Richard S.
July 21, 2016 at 12:57 am
My opinion about the no contact rule is it probably works better on women because they are the weaker vessel.
Megan
July 18, 2016 at 4:44 am
My ex and I broke up a week and a half ago. I have been in NC for a week, he came to my place to grab his things and we talked it out, laughed, reminisced, overall we had a good breakup. I believe he got GIGS, which inevitably led to him breaking up with me. However, he is going traveling for a month and is leaving in about a week. I’m going to extend my NC period until after he returns from his trip. However, I’m uncertain on how to break the NC ? What do I text him?
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 19, 2016 at 5:50 pm
Hi Megan
think of topics he loves talking about and then check this blog post for texting styles: Texting An Ex Boyfriend (The New Rules)
Jo
July 17, 2016 at 10:09 pm
Hi there, I’ve been in active no contact rule since the day I broke up with him it has 7 days now… I was the one who broke up but he didn’t give me another option. He was being an ass due the whole stress that he is having at work, I tried to talk.. he acknowledged that he was being a jerk and gave me an amazing card with beautiful words, a nice gift and took me out for dinner, than kind of vanished the whole weekend…I felt disrespected and broke up by text and blocked him for one day…… see we dated for 5 months… pretty intense, basically living together, couple of fights due the fact that we both have strong personalities…however not as much as we have things in common… we felt a mental connection that was unique,( at least he said so) hours of talking every day… we were doing pretty good till he “flip” on me… I’ve been being pretty anxy about the fact that he didn’t show up at all since I broke up… I know he is a very… very stubborn guy… his pride is bigger than his ego…I know he looks like a pig… but I promise that he has many.. many qualities… Any how… I’m freaking out! I’m start to think he has another girl which will kill me spirit… I already deleted his phone number (gave a copy to my sis)…. But his silence is killing me!! truly is… If he realize that he doesn’t like me? if he decided that he is too busy with work… I tried all I could to show him I am not an “enemy” and I will be there for him… by the way, I decided for a 21 days No contact since the broke up was totally an “unfinished” business… Why is he not responding me???
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 19, 2016 at 4:16 pm
Hi Jo,
You said he’s stubborn, then it’s just natural that he will not contact you.. and it’s just been a week.. You did the right thing of heading straight to nc.. focus more on improving yourself now
Kirsty
July 17, 2016 at 8:29 pm
Hi,
My boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago by text. We had lots of plans for moving in together in the future, however we are long distance at the moment. I have been trying no contact for the last two weeks but finding it difficult. He didn’t give any reason for the break up except the distance is too much and he doesn’t want to do the travel to see me any more. I feel this isn’t the true reason. Should I continue no contact and then try and ask about the break up? Or try to contact now?
Kirsty
July 19, 2016 at 10:18 pm
Thats great Amor, thank you. I do want to get back together. We were together for 3 years. Would you say still move on? When would be best to contact?
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 21, 2016 at 12:48 pm
Try to do no contact..and then after that slowly build rapport.. try to do 30 days
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 19, 2016 at 2:03 pm
Hi kirsty,
I think you won’t get a straight answer now if he doesn’t want to give it.. I think it’s better if you do nc for yourself.. I repeat.. for yourself.. and if you really want to know the truth, you have to let it go for now.. I think the better chance of knowing it is when he’s in the best mood when you’ve already built rapport and he knows that you’ve really moved on
suvi
July 12, 2016 at 3:05 pm
Hi,
I am in a pretty bad shape right now. He broke up with me about 35 days back. He was always scared of the idea of breaking up and now that he has done it, he says he is “happy” and that he is no more the victim now. He blames me for every single thing and refused to give me a chance of “hurting him again”.
I acted desperate for several days now that we have also come into a distance relationship. I begged and cried and he kept on showing his coldness. Last time we talked he told me that he will never contact me again and challenged me to win him back. He said he will do anything to escape me. After that I decided not to go for no-contact.
Is it the correct thing to do? Do I have a chance?
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 12, 2016 at 6:48 pm
hi Suvi,
you decided not to do no contact? if that’s a typo and you decided to do nc, then that’s good..be active in improving yourself too and you should do 45 days
Stacy
July 12, 2016 at 12:57 am
I broke up with my boyfriend about 2 weeks ago due to him having a lot of life issues I felt he needed to sort out. We were together for 5 months and I truly just wanted it to be more casual than never speak again. I tried calling him and texting him a few times to see if we could remain cool. No response. I did get nervous and started acting desperate even though I truly didn’t want to get back together until he figured out certain issues. I would have liked to keep in contact as he worked through his problems and enjoy each other’s company here and there. After two weeks we’ve spoken a few times but he’s very angry and sees it as my fault and I causes problems between us for no reason. I do truly care about him and I don’t want to date any one else but the relationship wasn’t good because he was very distracted by his problems. I’ve become the aggressor recently but I want to go no contact. I also did buy the premium package but I can’t seem to log on to access it. I would like to get back together but keep it light until he figures out how to manage his problems. We get a long great but he is one of those stubborn guys. I saw the relationship going in a direction that I didn’t like so I just wanted to back it up a bit. How can I log in and any advice. We spoke yesterday so today would be day one no contact .
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 12, 2016 at 4:11 pm
Hi Stacy,
email here: support@exboyfriendrecovery.com and my team mate leia will assist you with the log in.. Use the email you used for buying the package.. and with your nc that’s good..just start being active in improving yourself too
Sarah
July 11, 2016 at 1:57 pm
Hi there,
My boyfriend and I broke up because of his commitments throughout summer as I wanted to spend more time with him. I’m coming to the end of the NC and I still haven’t heard from him which is fine as I wasn’t really expecting him to. I have heard that he has spoken fondly of me and dare I say it has even said there may be a chance in the future. Im happy to contact him first however Im not sure when will be the best time. We both have separate vacations planned in a couple of weeks, do I message him before he goes away just to be friendly, or is it best to wait until we’re both back and then initiate a meet up, baring in mind this was the break up factor? How long is too long after the NC to start communication? Im so worried that he will forget about me during his holiday .
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 12, 2016 at 1:05 pm
Hi Sarah,
continue the activities even after nc and I think it’s better to initiate contact before his vacation and then lay low while he’s there and don’t ask to meet up right away..build rapport first
Selina
July 10, 2016 at 11:02 pm
Since he blocked me, it’s been 29 days. Unfortunately, yesterday I had a mutual friend contact him without my permission. I figured out two days ago that he just got a new girlfriend (and I’m sure he knows since he’s been spamming his Instragram with photos of their joint vacation). The mutual friend asked him “for me” if he wanted some stuff back. Should I still initiate contact tomorrow?
By the way, pretty sure this new girl is a rebound. The breakup was messy, but the max time I could say it took was a month since the break up. This new girl used my ex to cheat on her boyfriend of two years.
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 12, 2016 at 8:11 am
Hi Selina,
you didn’t break it because you didn’t instruct your friend to do it.. it’s better if you wait a week more because you’re right, he might think you’re just messaging because you knew about his new gf
Nicki
July 10, 2016 at 3:12 pm
Thanks for the advise , I am giving up on this man . I honestly believe he moved on is why he still has not responded to anything in a. Month .Not waisting time on someone who never obviously cared in the beginning . Just disappointing and I’ll be careful next man I decide to date.
Daisha
July 8, 2016 at 3:31 am
Ok my other message didn’t get through so I’ll make it short hahaha no contact 47 days last convo big text fight I broke up with him but he was nonplussed. However he was angry during fight and blocked me on phone and text. Sent a message today but I think I’m still blocked.
EBR Team Member: Amor
July 8, 2016 at 1:21 pm
hi Daisha,
it did..i just haven’t reached it yet when you checked..