The No Contact Rule: A Powerful Strategy That Works On Your Ex

6,800 thoughts on “The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)”

rajni

August 15, 2013 at 7:35 pm

Hi… My boyfriend broke with me 3 weeks ago cause of some family issues or so he says 🙁 the first week I was begging him to come back but he said he wanted to be alone but then again he said I still love you but I can’t be with you we will be just friends I agreed but then he started ignoring me .. So now I’m using the no contact rule .. But then he called me yesterday I didn’t receive it and I didn’t even reply his text did I do the right thing? I love him a lot and I want him back

admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:39 am

You did the right thing.
rajni

August 16, 2013 at 6:51 pm

Will he come back??
admin

August 17, 2013 at 3:32 am

I really can’t answer that b/c I don’t know. He could but that doesn’t mean he will. It is a tough question to ask me because I honestly have no clue, I don’t know him very well.
rajni

August 15, 2013 at 7:39 pm

And yeah , I heard he likes someone 🙁 will the NC rule effect him? Or should I just talk with him? I really want him back help me 🙁
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:39 am

NC rule should affect him if he is used to talking with you. That is what I would say
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:37 am

NC rule should affect him if he is used to talking with you.

Hailey

August 15, 2013 at 7:15 pm

My ex and I were together for 5 years, and lived together for 3 of those years. I orginally broke things off out of stress. It has been about three months since the break up, we talked about getting back together at the beginning but I wasn’t really being myself and didn’t take the actions I should have to make things work, he decided now (about a month or so ago) that he does not want to get back together and I do. This came about when he started dating another girl, and says he doesn’t want to mess things up and that I shattered all of his trust for me that I would one day leave him again. I am hoping it’s just a rebound relationship… The only times we talk now has been for me to get my stuff back from him. Should I still try the no contact rule?

admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:36 am

Absolutely! Try it out

Caroline

August 15, 2013 at 6:42 pm

Hi Everyone, My ex bf and I were dating for 3 months, we are both in our 50’s so not teenagers. it was love at first sight, we bonded straight away and the chemistry between us was magic. Although we live an hours drive away from each other we spent every spare minute together at mine or his.He said he had never loved anyone as much as me and had been waiting for me all his life, we loved each other madly. Then 7 days ago we argues he thought I was jealous of his ex wife and said he didn’t want jealousy in his life and needed to think, 2 days later he dumped me by text I begged him to listen to me but he wouldn’t. 3 days after that I went to collect my things he was really nice to me and said I didn’t know how much he loved me, he said we could still be friends and after a month we could see how things were. He text me later to ask if I was ok and again the next day he told me he loved me to bits. The following morning I text Hello X he didn’t reply for 6 hours and laughed, I went crazy and told him he was cruel and accused him of punishing me and said I loved him so much that I opray no one ever hurts him the way he’s hurting me. He was very angry and told me I can contact him if I still want him to repair my car but for nothing else. Now only on day 1 of nc will this work for me?

admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:33 am

You are a smart enough woman to know that noone can guarantee your success but all I can say is that the NC rule and everything I teach on this site will improve your chances (that is kind of my job figure out how you can succeed.)
Caroline

August 16, 2013 at 10:32 am

Day 2 nc and at 7.40am he text me to say he had a doctors apt at 10.20am and would be home around 12ish and said to let him know if I wanted him to finish the work on my car. Do I reply, will he be angry and think I don’t care if I ignore him? I love him so much and don’t want to blow this if this is my only chance
Caroline

August 20, 2013 at 6:05 am

Thank you for everything. I will now be sure to take your advice and be patient, ‘baby steps’. I am staying at his for a few days over the weekend. I will be sure to let you know how things go. Once again. THANK YO
admin

August 21, 2013 at 4:08 am

No problem if you need anything else feel free.
admin

August 17, 2013 at 3:05 am

Yes sort this mess out with your car, you are allowed to break NC but ONLY for that reason.
Caroline

August 19, 2013 at 9:22 pm

Hi, Just to give you an update…8pm last night he text me saying ” I love you with all my heart” again I couldn’t help myself and I replied “Why are you telling me this?” and he said “Because it’s true, I do”. Any way to get to the point WE ARE NOW BACK TOGETHER!!! I am so happy but I can’t help feel things are a little strained between us, he was always talking about plans for our future he’s not mentioned anything about that now, before we broke up I had my own wardrobe space etc but I get the feeling he doesn’t want me keeping any of my things at his house. Is this normal when a couple get back together or is he still unsure of our relationship?
admin

August 20, 2013 at 4:49 am

Don’t push it keep things in babysteps. It is going to be a while before things get back to normal. Congrats on getting back together. You are going up on the success stories section. WOOT WOOT!
Caroline

August 18, 2013 at 9:51 am

Thank you for your reply 18/08/2013 3.59am, Well at 2.12am this morning he text me again saying “been out with friends for the weekend just switched my phone on, let me know when you have a free dry day and I will check I’ve got a free dry day to finish your car off”…I have taken your previous advice about being allowed to break nc ONLY to sort my car out and have replied to him that I am free next Friday. Do you think the fact that he contacted me again is a good sign that he still wants to be with me?
admin

August 19, 2013 at 3:18 am

I think the fact he called you is a fantastic sign.
Caroline

August 17, 2013 at 11:08 am

12 noon 17/08/13, no reply from him about when it is convenient for him to finish the repairs on my car and ‘YES’ I’ve been even more stupid and text him again saying “He was right, I was crazy, that I had loved him more then I had ever loved anyone and because of that I believed the “He and what we once had had been worth fighting for, that I couldn’t just give up on “him and us” but I now realise that we BOTH had to want it back, so i’m not fighting anymore. I reminded him that when we met he said to me “if we argue and we will, we must sit down straight away and talk things through, that what we had was special and we can’t blow it” I then said “Well it is blown and I accept that. I said I don’t have any regrets that I was really happy when I was with him and will always remember that…God I am crazy aren’t I? I think I really have blown it now, Please is there ANYTHING at all I can do to salvage this mess?
admin

August 18, 2013 at 3:59 am

Try to remain calm. Frustration, worry and overthinking are killers in this science. Go NC for about 2 weeks and then try reaching out again.
Caroline

August 16, 2013 at 7:11 pm

I couldn’t help myself, I was so scared I would push him further away, I couldn’t bear it any longer then at 19.07 I text him back and said I had just got home and seen his text I asked him to let me know when it would be convenient for him to finish my car and I would pop it down to him. Now i’m even more scared. Have I blown it?
admin

August 17, 2013 at 3:40 am

Nah, you haven’t blown it.

Nameless

August 15, 2013 at 4:13 am

Hi Chris,
I have a question. I’m a bit concerned that my situation is a lost cause. My ex and I were together for 11 months when he broke it up saying that we were too young to commit. (We are both 21) we both discussed marriage and the future a lot and I now know that this was something that shouldn’t have came up so early in the relationship as commitment is a scary thing with guys. (he comes from a single parent household – only him and his mom with no contact to any other family) I was hysterical that he broke up with me. I went to his house unannounced and all the things an ex shouldn’t do. I went NC for a month after a month of talking to him here and there on fb chat (which always left me feeling confused and depressed). I found out he hung out with one of my girlfriends whom he DID NOT ever hangout with before. I flipped out and confronted him (wrong move, I know) and this was the “closure” part as I begged for him back, again. (I’ve done begging in person another time also which did not work and made him angry). He was angry at me because the girl had asked him to talk to me. He told me that he wanted to move on and date other girl. He said he didn’t know if I was what he wanted in his future and he didn’t know if walking away from this relationship. He also said that I did not change myself (I was too dependent on him emotional with all my problems) and didn’t want to go back to the relationship. He said that if its meant to be it’ll come back and we can talk one day but as of now we are nothing. He told a whole bunch of our mutual friends that although we have broken up, he isn’t saying that there is NEVER a chance we won’t get back but after the talk with him, I felt as though my chance went from 50/50 to 0. Do you think I have a chance? We started out as friends for a year before we went out. Around the time we broke up, he started a new internship and there was a lot of shifts in his life such as his mom going back to school for summer so he was left with work and the house duties. I know that this isn’t the MAIN reason he broke up with me, and a lot of people say to move on, but we had such a great relationship. He shared his family problems he never ever told anyone and he was surprised he would ever feel like this for anyone. I’m telling myself that sometimes the absence makes the heart grow fonder, but when I went NC it went against my odds and he wanted to move on even more because be heard I wasn’t doing well. What is your advice? Thank you so much.

admin

August 16, 2013 at 1:57 am

Well, have you tried contacting him via text in the way I suggest on this site?
Nameless

August 16, 2013 at 2:19 am

The last time I contacted him was 8/5 because my cat had passed away. I texted him saying that he had passed away and to have him in his mind but he did not respond.

sasha

August 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm

Helloe everyone,i have started the Nc like you adviced me but 2 weeks after i texted my ex just to knoe how he is,and he answer me he is ok,he tought that i was angry with him after our break up,i told him,its the past,then he said to me that he misses me ,that he really does because he always wanted to stay fiends he never stopped liking me,then i asked him i thought he loved someone else ,he told me he never did,there was nobody.At end of texto he ask me are we friends then,i said yes to dont argue again.Please why he still feel then miss if he doenst want me anymore,there is no chance to come back again?Thank you

admin

August 15, 2013 at 3:39 am

I think your problem lies in the texting portion of things. Check out this page: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/using-text-messages-to-get-your-ex-boyfriend-back/

Valerie Thys

August 14, 2013 at 1:22 pm

Hi, here is my story… I met a this guy two years ago… he is my boss ( we’ve been working together for 4 years, but never engaged conversation on a personal level, he was in a relationship – but he admitted on several occassions that he was following my career for the past 10 years and that was the reason why he hired me) We dated casually last year for about 3 weeks and all of a sudden he broke off all contact just to tell me that he would come back to me with an explanation why his head was not ready to continue our relationship (although nothing happened in those 3 weeks). Six months later I learned by somebody from his family that he returned to his former girlfriend of 5 years. After 10 months of no contact I did send him a mail to tell him that I stopped waiting for him and that I knew about his renewed relationship etc. And that I moved on. One month later he told me that they broke up again (one month before my mail) and that he wanted to reconnect with me. We started dating for 3 months, in secret. No coworkers could know and certainly not his ex (he didn’t want to hurt her feelings). After 3 months of dating we went all the way and we were a couple for about 3 months. We had a great time although some pressure because of the secrecy but we managed. We broke up over an argument of his bad communications sills and the fact that he wasn’t there for me the way I was there for him. After 3 weeks of arguing over the phone and by text we saw each other again for the first time since we broke up and it went fine. The next day he even bought me a present (airline ticket to spend the weekend with my kids who are on holiday with my parents while I am working and passing exams.) Yesterday I saw him at work ( three days after the ticket was bought) and he completely ignored me. What should I do?

admin

August 15, 2013 at 3:07 am

Whoa, he ignored you after buying you a ticket? That is so bizarre.

I would normally say NC rule but the plane tickets throw a monkey wrench in the equation. I think you should thank him for the ticket, chat him up for a while and then enter into NC.
Valerie Thys

August 15, 2013 at 6:08 am

Hi, thanks for replying. I did thank him in a very neutral way and said that we could try to be friends again but that he broke my trust over several issues and that trust needs to be earned. I also asked him if he could come and get me at the airport on my way home on sunday. Since he bought the ticket, this way he would know I really used it and I would be able to thank him personally. He said he couldn’t make it. Fair enough. Then I proposed him to stop by on his way to work this week to catch up then with a coffee at my place. He never answered me back. The thing is I have the gut feeling that there is something with the ex girlfriend (he raised her son, who’s not his son, but he considers the boy his since the child has no father). He has no legal right over the boy but they worked something out so the boy could spend at least one weekend a month with his ‘father’. And I think he is afraid that if she finds out about us, she will be so pissed that she would forbid him to see the boy. I don’t want to be paranoid but if this gut feeling is not it i really can’t imagine what is wrong with him. He only answers to text when it suits him.
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:00 am

I will get back to you via Facebook!
Valerie

August 16, 2013 at 4:36 am

🙂

Flowerie

August 14, 2013 at 9:11 am

I’m in no contact period with my ex and recently I changed my facebook relationship status into ‘in a relationship’ but didn’t mentioned with who and i already put him under my ‘restricted list’ in the facebook..

p/s: lots of our friend like it though..

am i a psycho?should i revert back the status to single?

admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:55 am

Yes, revert to single hahaha. There is no need to lie to get him back. At least that is not what I preach here.
Flowerie

August 15, 2013 at 7:27 am

i hide the relationship status anyway (not put any)
and after reading your post about facebook..i moved his name out from my restricted list..
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:01 am

Oh, how did you like the Facebook post?

Marta

August 14, 2013 at 8:28 am

Hi, I need somme advise.. Whot i should do when he call to me in NC period?? Or I should totally ignore him??

admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:47 am

Yup, you totally ignore him.

Blue

August 14, 2013 at 5:54 am

Hey admin,

So my ex told me he hasn’t been feeling the same and started not saying I love you as often I did .. He said he did think about breaking up because of commitment issues. But I feel it’s not the whole truth to the reason why. Could it have been me? Maybe something I did. Is there someway I can get him back ? Like I can live without him but life just was happier with him. Help please.

admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:43 am

Very rarely is the “it’s not you it’s me” excuse true. So yes, it was something you did but the good news is that you can reinvent yourself and knock his socks off. The no contact rule is a good way to start things if he does break up with you.
Blue

August 15, 2013 at 2:14 pm

Okay thank you.. I just feel it is my fault that we broke up…. I haven’t messaged for a week and a half now. I’m dying to text him and ask him how’s it going. I’ve been replaying the scenario of how and why we broke up so many times in my head!! Help!!
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:24 am

Just stay in NC. It’s too soon to reach out.
Blue

August 17, 2013 at 6:56 am

So I just should continue nc. I miss him so much .. I’ve been going out more to take my mind off it. Help??
admin

August 18, 2013 at 3:33 am

Yes, keep doing NC. Also, do more to take your mind off of it!
Blue

August 16, 2013 at 12:18 pm

Do you think asking for closure and apologizing that time will help? I felt the day we broke up i overreacted because we were supposed to hang out and he wasnt messaging me all day… Since I think i did grow dependant on him.
admin

August 17, 2013 at 3:17 am

Honestly, I don’t think it will help too much.

michelle

August 13, 2013 at 11:34 pm

My relationship with my ex ended two weeks ago and everything seemed really great until we had one argument in which he seemed to end up angered & broke it off via text after our argument. I’ve stuck to the no contact rule so far, but in three-four weeks contact will have to happen since classes begin by then, should this be more than enough time to mostly heal and face him? At this stage I’ve worked out more and stayed as positive and active as i can, but i’m still skeptical as to how i should act when i see him in the beginning of the next month.

admin

August 14, 2013 at 3:07 am

I think it should be enough time to power up :).

Cara

August 13, 2013 at 4:40 pm

(corrected typo)
When I did the first NC on this guy I was seeing, it seemed like it worked. But he did not contact me after the first meeting at the end of the NC. He was dating another girl. After then this guy was going back and forth between me and this girl. He is calling this girl his girlfriend, and telling me he has never dated me. I think I have to forget him, but I cannot. I am just doing NC again, but it seems like I am just counting days, and my emotion is not being changed. Anyway, do you think NC will help me? He contacted me 5 or 6 days after a big fight, but I did not reply him. What if he knows that I have done NC before? Do I have to make it longer than 30 days? I think I am really impatient doing NC. It is making me gloomy as hell.

admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:33 am

Cara, it makes everyone gloomy and angry hahaha.

You should see me doing NC. I am probably a nightmare to be around.

I think that is a smart way to approach things. Obviously nothing is guaranteed but as long as you stick to NC you raise your chances.

Sally

August 13, 2013 at 1:26 pm

My bf and i were together 8 months and saw each other everyday, he is 24 and i am 32… he adored me and we spoke about moving in together etc. After a few of our freinds and family started havibg babies and getting engaged he became distant and we had a conversation about it and he said he wouldnt want it for a while. His distance got so bad that i confronted him and he finaly said that ‘it was the right thing to do to break up’ he wouldnt budge on it and then after i saw him after a few day he said we were togther and then he changed his mind again and said we couldnt be togther it has been 8 days of no contact although we are bothe still following each other on twitter so he has posted things about being out having fun and so have i. i really want him back but i feel he is now used to being without me and will never come back due to his friends and older brother probably telling him i’m too old for him. He was honetsly so into me its such a shock, he did say he had been thinking it for a few weeks tho. Will NC work for me possibly?

admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:22 am

NC might work for you!

My question is: “are you two used to talking on the phone every day?”
Sally

August 14, 2013 at 2:21 pm

sorry i didnt understand what u meant, yes we spoke everyday, we saw each other everyday as well.
Sally

August 14, 2013 at 2:20 pm

No we havent spoken at all since Monday 5th August and we also slept together, it was offically split on Monday 5th then i sent a long txt on Tuesday 6th just to say a few things that i didnt get a chance to say, he didnt reply and i havent heard from him since we saw each other on the Mon 5th Aug

Aukje

August 13, 2013 at 12:17 pm

Hi
(I know I’m still young I am 18 years old and my ex is 19 years old.) but I want to do the NC rule..

But I’m just a bit insecure about all of this.. And I would appreciate it if you could tell me what you think about all of this and maybe give me some advice?

He’s not really the type to go after a girl, nor does he easily express his feelings..(but he can be a reaaallyyy sensitive guy deep down) We broke up last thursday and I haven’t contacted him since last saturday. saturday I told him as long as it’s before Thursday that we would talk.
( he texted me Thursday that we needed to talk, I asked him to call me for a bit. He called me but he wasn’t able to say anything at all. He was crying really, REALLY hard. And later in a whatsapp text he said that he still loves me but he doesn’t think it would work anymore, and he said that he would come over one of these days to talk about it )

We’ve been in a relationship for half a year and suddenly out of the blue he told me he wasn’t happy anymore with the 2 of us. It came just out of the blue! He said he doesn’t know exactly why he didn’t feel happy anymore with us. I personal think it was because of pressure (there were some troubles, but not only between the two of us but also things not relevant with our relationship.

In about 5 weeks is my birthday and I decided to have a little movie night. A friend of me said that I should ask him, on this sort of way: ‘Hey that date I’m having a movie night and if you’re ready and want to come you can come’ or something like that. That same friend told me that she also thinks that if I would just not talk to him and would just wait he would realise what he has lost and would want me back.

Right now I’m focusing on having funn with friends and finding new hobby’s or doing stuff I like.

But I have questions and I would hope that you could answer them..
What if he doesn’t contact me to talk about it? just act like I don’t care?
And what if he does come to my birthday, should I ask him to try again and if so how can I see if it’s the right time?
What if he would text me like ‘I miss you’ what should I respond ?

That’s about my story..
I’m sorry for the long post, and I’m really a mess right now.. also sorry for my not correct english I’m from holland.. can you help me..?

admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:11 am

Ok first off I want to say something. You are really young so IF (and I am not saying this won’t work out) but if this doesn’t work out for you it won’t be the end of the world trust me. It will hurt sure but you have a lot of good times ahead of you.

Your Questions

1. If he doesn’t contact you then you shouldn’t care yes. However, if he doesn’t contact you after your thirty days are up you can contact him so eventually you two will talk.
2. I wouldn’t ask him to your birthday. You go out and have fun and he can sit at home and wallow in his depression. No fun for him.
3. If he texts you during the NC period you shouldn’t respond to it.
Aukje

August 14, 2013 at 11:06 am

Thank you for taking your time for reading my story and giving me advice, that’s all I wanted to say now 🙂
Thank you!
admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:59 am

Your very welcome!
Aukje

August 18, 2013 at 12:20 am

Okay I have one question..
We both have each other on facebook,
and sometimes he makes funny posts which I would normaly like. But does the nc rule include not liking the status of your ex on facebook?
admin

August 18, 2013 at 4:30 am

It could really work in your favor though b/c it will make him wonder why you fell off the map and you want him chasing you!
admin

August 18, 2013 at 4:30 am

Yes, unfortunately you can’t like any more of his posts.

rosie

August 13, 2013 at 6:11 am

im away with my family at the moment and my boyfriend broke up with me. a few days before he broke up with me he wasnt really talking to me much which made me frustrated. we are both starting college in about a week so when he broke up with me he said that its because long distance wouldnt work because we fight too much and im being too needy. he also said that he didnt want a relationship. we broke up about 3 days ago and havent talked since but im going to be back home in 2 days and i dont know what to do if he asks to see me. we leave for college soon so if i do the 30 day no contact rule then theres no hopes of us getting back together because we wont be able to see eachother until winter break. what do you suggest? he was madly in love with me and i wouldve expected a text by now but i havent gotten anything..

admin

August 14, 2013 at 1:45 am

Wow, that is tricky. However, I want to point out that the strategies I talk about on this site can sometimes take months to work. I know that seems like a long time but you can’t rush this. The main problem here is that you two are going to be apart going to different schools.

Jordan

August 13, 2013 at 12:36 am

V sadly hi admin:-(
My ex boy not proper loving me since 3 days. Actually my boy have a cousin he jeolous our relation . Some time he controlled him and doing against me . My boy now that I loved him true much that he had checked me. When his cousin come with him home. Then my boy start ignoring me . Don’t text me don’t called me …… But I was waiting his text or call but he is also a rational boy. Why he is doing me like that ….
Iast time at Eid event my ex boy did’t text me for EID Mubarak and some thing but I was aspecting . Our relation time have 7year but now liked me I think inside but not show me . My ex-boy cousin have done sex with my boy but he did’t satisfied my ex boy. I ever satisfied my Ex boy . During sex he showed me a satisfaction at his face during kissing and during fucking. But last time 3time a day I fucked him with completely passion. Suddenly he showing me some attitude with his cousin and his cousin showing me favor but my ex boy continuously ignoring me not liking me . Not say a little word for me. But after a party all frnds going back home and my boy don’t come with my bike he go other bike with my other friend for jeolousing me. And his cousin come and sit with my bike I don’t want to sit with him but he sit. But I did not mind it . When I droped him with my ex-boy and I come home the weather become rainy with white black cloud with chill air blowing . I called him he did’t contact me I text him a fire I said to my ex-boy “when you did ‘nt meet me you fuck your ass with your cousin that’s why my ex-boy cousin did’t go back home and working their home like a slave without any money but his cousin before me he was addicted my ex-boy Ass. After meet me my xboy left him but after a many year my xboy doing same with me but did’t want to leave him his body electron match my body 100%. I get 100% satisfaction with him.
My ex boy knows I didn’t live out him. May that’s why he doing this . Since two days NC . tell me Admin what I do.? I have every thing only not my ex-boy. I’m missing him so much ……. But can’t text him or call him. I’m worried about my relation. My every day I spending is going too tough , tight , help me suggest me a best step for get back admin.
Thanks
Regard
JORDAN

Aukje

August 13, 2013 at 12:53 pm

I just wanted to say..
Goodluck 🙂
I hope for everyone here that things will end well.
admin

August 13, 2013 at 3:21 am

You are on the right track with NC but you also have to focus on yourself during that time. You seem to be focusing on him too much.

Michaela

August 12, 2013 at 8:52 am

Hi,

I really want to get the NCR in action, but am wanting a bit of advice on carrying it out.

See, my ex and I are in the same class (yes, we’re school-age), we’re friends on Facebook, we only went out for eight days and he’s in a relationship now too. I’m not entirely sure if it’s a rebound or not.

Could you give me any tips on trying to avoid him, if possible?

admin

August 13, 2013 at 2:28 am

Well, if you can’t avoid him you can do minimal contact where you essentailly do NC but if you run into him you don’t act weird and just act pleasant but a little short. If you pass him in the hallway give him a smile and a wave like there are no hard feelings. Be the positive person that you are!

rosie

August 12, 2013 at 5:06 am

The no contact period u suggest is for 30 days..but my ex said he wanted space to heal himself for 6 months..(dont know why he said for 6 months). Should i maintain the no contact period for 30 days or follow his duration? Of course the 6 months no contact period is quite long even 2 weeks no contact is already torturing..*sigh

N yes we had a huge fight and he was extremely angry..

admin

August 13, 2013 at 2:18 am

I say try the 30 days. Look at it like a test to see if HE is true to HIS word.
Rosie

August 14, 2013 at 8:56 am

i ‘restricted’ him on my facebook anyway..
and yes i try for 30 days no contact rule (its been 14 days since the last time i talked to him)
admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:54 am

Good job on the NC rule! You have 16 days left. What are you doing during that time?
Rosie

August 15, 2013 at 7:36 am

i would say crazy and yes indeed it is the most challenging. can’t wait for the NC rule to finish and nervous at the same time..like u said it is the part of strategy and i’m giving my last try on this relationship..

btw I just followed whatever that u teach here..been losing weight, hang out with my friends a lot, pampering myself, training for my coming marathon. Just keeping myself busy…and lastly I’m planning to change my hairstyle..(before we break up he wanted me to cut my hair shot)
admin

August 16, 2013 at 2:03 am

Wow Rosie GREAT JOB. I am so proud to hear that. Do you feel more in control and empowered?
rosie

August 12, 2013 at 3:46 pm

Can i stalk my ex in the facebook during no contact period?
Or i should just block him in the facebook?
admin

August 13, 2013 at 2:50 am

If you are capable of “stalking” without contacting him then yes you can. If not though then you better block him.

Janny

August 11, 2013 at 11:02 pm

Hey Chris ,

Do you think this can work for me if my ex said he’s been losing feelings for me and wanting to not commit. We’re still in our early 20s

admin

August 12, 2013 at 2:51 am

Hi there,

Yes, it can definitely work. Though, that doesn’t guarantee success. However, you really need to pay attention to your texts after NC.
Janny

August 12, 2013 at 12:01 pm

What should my first few texts be like?!
admin

August 13, 2013 at 2:34 am

My favorite variation of the first few texts is the “I have a confession” text. I like it b/c it grabs attention quickly and you can give out a sweet confession.

“I have a confession to make…”

“what is it?”

“I just caught myself thinking about you as I was watching Angel on T.V.”

Something like that is what I would try first.
Janny

August 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm

What did you do after the nc rule to get them back ??
admin

August 15, 2013 at 3:23 am

Hahaha read this page.
janny

August 13, 2013 at 5:08 pm

You don’t think itll creep him out with reminding him things like that?
admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:35 am

You can dumb it down to make it less “creepy” I guess. Hahahha
Jammy

August 13, 2013 at 12:03 pm

Have you ever gotten someone back by the nc rule?
admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:04 am

Good question!

I have used the NC rule before myself and it worked but it wasn’t the act of NC that worked for me. It was what I did after it that really did it. Of course, I came to the conclusion I was better off taking my business elsewhere. I am working on putting a success section together of all the people successes using the tactics on this site. I have a pretty good number already 🙂

reet

August 11, 2013 at 3:45 pm

i will try this website in my life and hope dat i will get him back in my life

admin

August 12, 2013 at 2:30 am

Good luck and keep us all updated!

Kate

August 11, 2013 at 8:03 am

Hi Admin,
Thanks for this site, am going to follow all the conditions and hopeful it will work. What if he has started dating a younger woman than me? Cos he told me that he has found someone who is in campus, and guys at his age prefer dating very young women because the older ones have been through a lot of things, have seen a lot and so he wants someone fresh.
I felt really bad and it really hurt me because it was like it is me he was speaking of, i feel stupid and i feel like he has wasted my youthful years and now he is seeing like i have lost taste.
What do i do?

I am very beautiful, i maintain myself, i watch my weight which am a size 8-10, i dress very classic good clothes people even call me a fashionist, am a graduate class lady with now a good job, am hard working and independent, am very social, very generous, God fearing, and i come from a good respected family where am the only girl. Aren’t these the qualities men are looking for? Above all i want to settle down, to have a family and raise my own kids. I want to be a mum, wife and a career woman and i even used to tell this is what i want.

I had written to you on the site of rebound.

admin

August 12, 2013 at 2:21 am

Kate!

I don’t know if it is just me but I think older women are kinda hot. Younger women tend to annoy me with some of the things they do. So, I wouldn’t put yourself down about that.

Those are qualities most men are looking for. However, you need to have something else. You need to have a little more elusiveness and mystery!
Kate

August 13, 2013 at 12:03 pm

So how can i have a little more elusiveness and mystery?

If these are the qualities men like there is this guy i am in the same campus with where am doing my second bachelors degree. He is doing his masters.
He has shown quit some interest in me for a while now, but i do not know why he has never officially asked me out, we only hang out as friends and he treats well with a lot of respect. He’s working and appears financially stable. He broke up with he’s girlfriend early this year, and he knew i was also dating someone.
When i met him it was those times when i had broken off with my ex, and he was not in good terms with his. I kept off him but he would occasionally check up on me via phone calls or messages. He is a really nice gentleman but i felt i needed to finish campus and get a job in order to fit into his life. When i called him and told him i got a job he was happy for me unlike my ex, and nowadays if i text him he will reply back immediately, if i call him he will make sure to call me back if he didn’t receive it and would apologize about it. Before then he would take a couple of days to reply my texts or called me back or sometimes he wouldn’t at all. But when we met he would treat me well like a lady.
So since my ex has clearly shown me how done he is with me, i know i have to give myself time off but i want to strengthen the bond with this guy. You may never know?

How can i win his attention and strengthen the bond we have.
admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:03 am

Be really confident, drop hints to test him on how he is feeling about you.

If he is really shy then you may have to progress things yourself. Casually invite him out with your friends.
Kate

August 14, 2013 at 6:46 am

So how can i have a little more elusiveness and mystery?
Am also a shy person and when i get the courage to communicate to him and he doesn’t respond well i feel very disappointed. I do have confidence in myself and in life but when it comes to guys it vanishes off. This makes guys to think i am avoiding them or i got too much pride cos of my looks. I guess books have really sucked up that part of me.Also cos of all the mean and stressful things i received from my ex i fear guys in a way too.
admin

August 15, 2013 at 2:51 am

Well, an elusive girl will be one that kind of baits a guy, get the guy to chase after her and then kind of pulls away only to bait the guy again. Kind of like a game of cat and mouse. I think with you mystery wouldn’t go well, instead I would say CONFIDENCE is what you need to be aiming for.

You just admited that you are a little uncomfortable around the opposite sex (I am too to be honest.) However, I fake confidence until people actually think I am confident. Let me give you an example. I had to get up in front of a buisness writing class and give a ten minute presentation. Everyone said I was the most confident presenter but the truth was that I was shaking, nervous and didn’t feel confident. BUT I appeared confident and that is what people thought of me.
Kate

August 13, 2013 at 12:07 pm

I have know this guy for almost an year now, and when we meet or bump into each other in campus or at restaurants in town we both seem happy to see each other.
admin

August 14, 2013 at 2:07 am

Okay… hahaha is there more to that thought?

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