How To Get A Long Distance Relationship Ex Boyfriend Back

5,234 thoughts on “The Complete Guide To Getting An Ex Boyfriend Back In A Long Distance Relationship”

Sarah

February 10, 2018 at 1:27 am

My ex just left earlier this morning bound to Malaysia because of work. We broke up back on December 24 because he got fed up of my attitude. January 30, he suddenly called me and agreed to meet up. We talked for hours, asked one another what went wring and ended up having sex. After that we started talking again (very minimal though). He said I shouldn’t set my expectations high anymore but he’s not closing his doors. What does that mean? He said he doesn’t have any plans of entering a new relationship especially looking for another girl, he wants me to change my attitude and ways and be happy.

What should I do. We’d been together for 4 years and 2 mos and we even had plans of getting married.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 15, 2018 at 12:41 pm

HI Sarah,

That means there’s chance but it can also mean he wants to friendzone you or be fwb with you.. if he’s staying long in Malaysia, follow the advice above.

Mary

January 24, 2018 at 11:18 am

My boyfriend broke up with me a few days ago and I’m lost without him.
we met abroad during an exchange and we don’t come from the same country. So when the exchange was over I decided to move to his country where he was finishing his study. I didn’t really know anybody there nor the language which made it a real challenge ( but I thought a real proof of my love).
He is a very social man, has always been, I on the other have had troubles in the past making friends. But I wanted to make it work, to make the efforts, and I started really believing in a future with him, started making plans and projects with him I never thought of ( children, work…). We lived for months together there (10 in total)

He broke up with me first: he said that it was because he felt like we didn’t have a future together, that it felt impossible that i learned the language ( which i was doing), that I was asking for too much of his time, that he didn’t feel like he could do all the things he wanted with his friends. but I couldn’t accept it, I wanted to fight for the love we had, so much, I negociated, I asked for more time, I begged, I told him that if he still loved me it would be worth it. after a day of speaking he said ok. A week after I asked him again ( because I was afraid and I had been walking on eggshells all week), he said that he still had that feeling that we wouldn’t be together forever, but he told me he loved me and he really wanted to work for it, to work on it and make it work! ( i was so happy!)

It motivated me to search for a job even more, to subscribe to a sport to meet new people and make friends, to give him the freedom and the life he was asking for. A few days after, we went to a party and i gave him his space, made friend with other girls, I was doing great but he started talking with his former booty call right in front of me, which of course, made me feel so bad and jealous. So I ignored him the rest of the night. But I apologised the day after and it was ok.
The day we broke up, we went out fishing with two friends and it was really cool, and we went to see some of his friends play handball ( which is a very important part of his liife, but i have never played, so don’t really care, but I wanted to make the effort for him and to be with him). I was doing so good until he decided to go play ball with his friends during half time, leaving me alone on my chair, while I had come to be with him. There were two people I had talked to before close by ( which was his excuse to leave me) but they were talking the foreign language and imagine how hard it is to engage in the conversation when you don’t know what it,s about and you need to switch language… So i got mad at him and told him it wasn’t cool to leave me on my own.

We went back to our place and he told me he wanted to break up with me for sure. I tried to reason with him again, to give me more time But he was sure, he had felt bad about changing his mind before apparently; after a couple hours of heated conversation, of me trying to convince him, he even told me he didn’t love me anymore ( which I’m not sure about, was he saying that so that i let go?). I gave in and we took my flight ticket back home. We spent the day after together, it was awesome and incredibly sad. I didn’t want to believe I was letting go of a life I wanted so much. He was so sad too, it felt like he was hurting a lot too.

I took the plane the day after, he drove me there.

I have been wondering how to make him love me again, realise he made a mistake and give a second chance. It is even harder as he is in another country. Plus, I really don’t think the NC rule would work on him, because I have been the one who asks question in our relationship, who kept the conversation going when we lived apart for a few weeks. I believe if i implement it now, it will just give him the opportunity to move on, to forget me, because he has a lot going on otherwise (studies, friends, handball, parties…). Did i also ruin my chances by begging for it so much?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 25, 2018 at 7:25 pm

Hi Mary,

check this one:
Will My Ex Forget Me If I Do No Contact

Maya

January 21, 2018 at 9:25 pm

How do I get an LDR ex back after a fight regarding a lack of communication if I gnatted him a few times after the fight and he just says he wants to left alone? It was a 5 month relationship and I’m on day 12 of NC. Should I do 30 or 45 days?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 22, 2018 at 4:28 am

Hi Maya

Check this one:
My Ex Boyfriend Thinks I’m Annoying

Darling

January 20, 2018 at 1:17 am

I got with my ex just over a year after his divorce, we were together for 11 months. Before we broke up, We lived together for about 2 months & during this time he started putting me down, being ignorant n distancing himself. He broke up with me by text. 2 weeks after I got back. We had an argument, I felt like he was grasping at straws for reasons to end it & he did. A few weeks after no contact, I sent him a letter, in which he replied, said he wasn’t planning on ending it n saying if I have questions to ask him. I shouldn’t of replied but i did ask him a few questions, said he had enough. I’m currently going no contact on day 20.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 21, 2018 at 5:05 am

Hi Darling,

That means your count needs to start after he asked if you still have questions.. And after nc, don’t send a letter again.. Are you actively improving and posting in social media?

Chelsea

January 12, 2018 at 9:34 pm

Hello Amor,
I took your advice from earlier to reach out one more time and this time he didn’t respond. Should I just give up now? I have pasted my original message to you below that you said it would be okay to initiate:
My boyfriend and I broke up month ago after 5 months Long Distance relationship. We met online and He came to visit me to meet in person once. We would FaceTime occasionally and Snapchat/text everyday. Distance was hard and he said he wasn’t fully ready to commit all the way because of it. We tried being friends but It didnt work for me so I asked to stop contact and went NC for a little over a month. I initiated contact last week. We texted for 3 days then he didn’t respond to my last text. I sent him a Snapchat on new year saying happy new year and he responded saying it back and I left it at that. I havnt reached out since though. Should I let him reach out now? Or should I try reaching out some more. He does respond when I do but I’m not sure if he’s just being nice.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 15, 2018 at 1:03 am

ok, this time let him initiate.. if he doesn’t after two weeks, that means it’s better to move on.

Mary

January 11, 2018 at 2:50 am

We were dating for 6 months and he suddenly ended our relationship because he got into law school 800 miles away. He said he doesn’t want to be in a long distance relationship. Our relationship was great, almost never argued, and we had an undeniable chemistry and spark. He said the only reason for ending it is because of the distance. I told him I loved him and he said he has feelings for me but is not in love.

I had no contact with him for about 25 days, but then I texted wishing him good luck in school a few days before his move. He was very responsive via texts and kept the conversation going. He’s said to me that he wishes we can still be friends and talk to me about everything. It’s been about two weeks since that initial text and he is almost always the one who initiates contact. It’s been about a week of texting, and I respond but then I eventually end the conversation by not asking any more questions or just simply not texting any more.

I want us to get back together and try being in a LDR. Will this guide be helpful even though he has already explicitly said he doesn’t want to be in a LDR? We are currently in the Random Meme and Remember the Good Times phase, but he is actually the one initiating these texts. How should I proceed if I want him back?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 11, 2018 at 7:07 pm

Hi Mary,

Yeah, it can help increase your chances but I think you need to restart nc and then start being active in your life.. once he sees you have your own life while his away, it can help making him more open when you start building rapport because he can see you’re not going to be a burden while his away because you also have your own life.

Mary

January 10, 2018 at 10:54 pm

My posts are not showing up on my part so sorry if this is a duplicate.

We were dating for 6 months and he ended our relationship because he was moving 800 miles away for law school for 3 years. He said he doesn’t want to be in a long distance relationship. Our relationship was great, almost never argued, and we had an undeniable chemistry and spark. He said the only reason for ending it is because of the distance.

I had no contact with him for about 25 days, but then texted wishing him good luck in school a few days before his move. He was very responsive via texts and kept the conversation going. He’s said to me that he wishes we can still be friends and talk to me about his new journey. It’s been about two weeks since that initial text and he is always the one who initiates contact. It’s been about a week of texting, and I respond but then I eventually end the conversation. I want us to get back together and try being in a LDR.

Will this guide be helpful even though he has already explicitly said he doesn’t want to be in a LDR? We are currently in the Random Meme and Remember the Good Times phase, but he is actually the one initiating these texts. How should I proceed if I want him back?
Mary

January 10, 2018 at 10:03 pm

We were dating for 6 months and he ended our relationship because he was moving 800 miles away for law school for 3 years. He said he doesn’t want to be in a long distance relationship. Our relationship was great, almost never argued, and we had an undeniable chemistry and spark. He said the only reason for ending it is because of the distance.

I had no contact with him for about 25 days, but then texted wishing him good luck in school a few days before his move. He was very responsive via texts and kept the conversation going. He’s said to me that he wishes we can still be friends and talk to me about his new journey. It’s been about two weeks since that initial text and he is always the one who initiates contact. It’s been about a week of texting, and I respond but then I eventually end the conversation. I want us to get back together and try being in a LDR.

Will this guide be helpful even though he has already explicitly said he doesn’t want to be in a LDR? We are currently in the Random Meme and Remember the Good Times phase, but he is actually the one initiating these texts. How should I proceed if I want him back?
Liz

January 10, 2018 at 8:32 pm

We were dating for 6 months and he ended our relationship because he was moving 800 miles away for law school for 3 years. He said he doesn’t want to be in a long distance relationship. Our relationship was great, almost never argued, and we had an undeniable chemistry and spark. He said the only reason for ending it is because of the distance.

I had no contact with him for about 25 days, but then texted wishing him good luck in school a few days before his move. He was very responsive via texts and kept the conversation going. He’s said to me that he wishes we can still be friends and talk to me about his new journey. It’s been about two weeks since that initial text and he is always the one who initiates contact. It’s been about a week of texting, and I respond but then I eventually end the conversation. I want us to get back together and try being in a LDR.

Will this guide be helpful even though he has already explicitly said he doesn’t want to be in a LDR? We are currently in the Random Meme and Remember the Good Times phase, but he is actually the one initiating these texts. How should I proceed if I want him back?
Mary

January 10, 2018 at 8:11 pm

We were dating for 6 months and he ended our relationship because he was moving 800 miles away for law school for 3 years. He said he doesn’t want to be in a long distance relationship. Our relationship was great, almost never argued, and we had an undeniable chemistry and spark. He said the only reason for ending it is because of the distance.
I had no contact with him for about 25 days, but then texted wishing him good luck in school a few days before his move. He was very responsive via texts and kept the conversation going. He’s said to me that he wishes we can still be friends and talk to me about his new journey. It’s been about two weeks since that initial text and he is always the one who initiates contact. It’s been about a week of texting, and I respond but then I eventually end the conversation. I want us to get back together and try being in a LDR.
Will this guide be helpful even though he has already explicitly said he doesn’t want to be in a LDR? We are currently in the Random Meme and Remember the Good Times phase, but he is actually the one initiating these texts. How should I proceed if I want him back?
Joy

January 10, 2018 at 11:10 am

Hi Amor,

Thank you for answering my question.

Can i make NC longer like 45 days or more? Also will there be an impact on him if i will not greet him on his special day the date will fall on my 28th day of NC?
Joy

January 10, 2018 at 3:41 am

Hi amor thank you for anawering my question.

Can i make the NC longer loke 45days or longer? Also will there be an impact on him if i will not greet him on his special day? Thanks so much
Joy

January 10, 2018 at 3:29 am

Thanks for answering my question amor,
Can i make the NC longer? Like 45 days or more?also will there be an impact on him if i will not greet him on his special event?
Joy

January 9, 2018 at 8:36 pm

My bf broken up with me last month dec 7, we have a long distance relationship for 1.5years although we are seeing each other every 3months, weve dated for more than a year before going official, ive known him for 7 years, the reason for our breakup was that ive been too much clingy and asking for a lot of time his been busy training for triathlon, the day before our breakup weve said a lot of hurtful things to each other ive also the one triggered him to say that he dont want this relationship anymore,he said at first that he still love me thats why ive never lost contact to him after our break up but that causes much more damage to us due to pleading on my part, at first he was the first to message me but right now i was the one always reaching out for him, the last time we have communication was after the new year just a friendly conversation then after that i havent heard from him or me talking to him, ive started embracing loving myself, ive been doing the journal thing but i’m just writing all the things im grateful for, and meditating that keeps me calm and grounded,i am more happier now, but i still wanted to have him back, do i still need to send him a messagee that i wont be messaging him during the no contact period?i know he will not going to message me if i will not going to initiate the conversation, i also want him to realize that i’m worth fighting for

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 10, 2018 at 1:30 am

Hi Joy,

nope, don’t tell him you’re not talking to him anymore nor about nc.

Chelsea

January 6, 2018 at 11:33 pm

My boyfriend and I broke up month ago after 5 months Long Distance relationship. We met online and He came to visit me to meet in person once. We would FaceTime occasionally and Snapchat/text everyday. Distance was hard and he said he wasn’t fully ready to commit all the way because of it. We tried being friends but It didnt work for me so I asked to stop contact and went NC for a little over a month. I initiated contact last week. We texted for 3 days then he didn’t respond to my last text. I sent him a Snapchat on new year saying happy new year and he responded saying it back and I left it at that. I havnt reached out since though. Should I let him reach out now? Or should I try reaching out some more. He does respond when I do but I’m not sure if he’s just being nice.

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 9, 2018 at 6:07 pm

Hi Chelsea,

It’s ok to initiate. It’s more important that you’re the one ending the convo at high point

Chelsea

January 6, 2018 at 10:30 pm

My boyfriend and I broke up month ago after 5 months Long Distance relationship. We met online and He came to visit me to meet in person once. We would FaceTime occasionally and Snapchat/text everyday. Distance was hard and he said he wasn’t fully ready to commit y’all the way because of it. We tried being friends but It didnt work for me so I asked to stop contact and went NC for a little over a month. I initiated contact last week. We texted for 3 days then he didn’t respond to my last text. I sent him a Snapchat on new year saying happy new year and he responded saying it back and I left it at that. I havnt reached out since though. Should I let him reach out now? Or should I try reaching out some more. He does respond when I do but I’m not sure if he’s just being nice.
Chelsea

January 6, 2018 at 10:19 pm

My boyfriend and I broke up month ago after 5 months Long Distance relationship. We met online and He came to visit me to meet in person once. We would FaceTime occasionally and Snapchat/text everyday. I wanted a relationship and he wasn’t ready and we tried being friends but It didnt work for me so I asked to stop contact and went NC for a little over a month. I initiated contact last week. We texted for 3 days then he didn’t respond to my last text. I sent him a Snapchat on new year saying happy new year and he responded saying it back and I left it at that. I havnt reached out since though. Should I let him reach out now? Or should I try reaching out some more. He does respond when I do but I’m not sure if he’s just being nice.
Nicole

January 6, 2018 at 3:50 pm

Hi,

My boyfriend broke up with me after 9 months. He said he is working things out with his ex because he thinks it would be best for their 5 year old son. He said hes probably making the biggest mistake of his life and that if he could make it happen I would be the mother of both of his kids. I asked him if this is what he really wanted and would make him happy. His first response was that he needed to be around his kids more. When I said thats not what I asked he hesitated but eventually said yes. He said how happy he is with me and how much fun he has with me and said I would be great with his kids. I met him online when he was in my area for work and spent a lot of time with him in person but never went to his home. Would this approach be appropriate in this circumstance?

EBR Team Member: Amor

January 9, 2018 at 5:36 pm

Hi Nicole,

Yes, you can try the advice above

Kirsten

December 28, 2017 at 4:00 pm

Ive been dating this guy for a little over 7 months. We met online and was together in person for 3 months in total. We argued a lot. And the 3 months were dividend into 2 visits. After the 1st visit he said if we argued the second visit we should break up. Second visit was even worse. But the last week we were good. He surprised me with gifts and bubble baths etc.

Then I left to go back to my country and we had 1 bad argument where he said he want in love with me but he loved me. So I told wait til we’re in person so we could figure it out. He would always bring up the arguments as an excuse to break up. I know it was mostly me arguing, but I told him I’ll change and I know I told him that after the 1st visit. But being away for so long gave me time to think and change.

A few weeks later he called me and the first thing he says is that he wants an open relationship. He said he still wants to be with me but he feels he wants an open relationship. I didnt see how that would help us and I didn’t see me getting anything good out of it. Again, I got him to change his mind and told him wait til we’re in person.

During the 2 weeks after everything was good, better than ever, he called me baby, babe, beautiful when texted good morning. And on FaceTime he’d sing to me and seem excited to talk to me. But then after those 2 weeks, he calls me and the first thing he says is he’s not in love with me anymore and he think we should break up. I asked twice if it’s because he found someone else, he said no.

I had already bought his ticket to visit me here in January and I was supposed to leave with him and he said he’ll just give me the money back.

I’m just so confused because we were so good just for him to break up and said he can’t keep fronting

So when I do ask for the money for the tickets back and etc. he tells me I’m childish and petty. But the way he broke up was childish and petty. And now he has blocked me off Instagram and Facebook. But not my number ….. yet

I still love him and all I wanted was to see him here in January because the last time we saw each other was late October

Please help me because I’m hurting and can’t function. (I’m 21 and he’s 29)

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 28, 2017 at 8:25 pm

Hi Kirsten
if he wants to pay for it, he will.. right now, do the advise above.

Deanna

December 28, 2017 at 4:35 am

Hi, my boyfriend and I were in a LDR for 1.5 years. He broke up with me when I was 7 months pregnant, I cried for and begged him to work on the relationship but it did work out. After I gave birth to our child, I found out he was seeing someone else, I was deeply hurt and told him I would change to make our relationship work. He didn’t agree. I started ignoring him for a few weeks and he started calling saying how much he misses me and I am the perfect woman for him. He told me he is not in love with the other person, but I am still hurt. He told me he really wants to see changes in me so we can really work this time. What should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

December 28, 2017 at 7:01 pm

Hi Deanna,

he’s the one who left you when you were pregnant and then cheated later, and yet you’re the one who needs to improve for the relationship?

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5,234 thoughts on “The Complete Guide To Getting An Ex Boyfriend Back In A Long Distance Relationship”