By Chris Seiter

Published on March 8th, 2023

A few days ago our community received this post,

And I just knew I had to interview her. What followed was one of the best conversations I’ve ever had with an ex recovery member.

We talked about all sorts of things ranging from,

  • Thida’s Story
  • The transition from anxious to secure
  • The importance of social media game
  • Advice on what really works to not just get one ex back (but all exes)
  • Trinity work
  • Motivation on how to stick with the program
  • The importance of having a battle buddy


What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?

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Chris Seiter 00:03
All right, today we have an interview that is one of the more unique ones that I think we’ve ever had on this is Thida. And not only did I believe the the group posts that you posted in the community was like, I didn’t just get my ex back. I’ve had every ex come back since I’ve started going through this. So her and I are just gonna have an organic conversation. But thanks for coming on and doing this Thida.

Thida 00:29
Thank you for having me. Like I told you earlier, I completely manifested this. I literally, when I was writing that little post on Facebook, I said, the moment I write this, I’m gonna hear from Chris and I’m gonna be sitting with him having an interview. Right? Yeah.

Chris Seiter 00:44
And that’s pretty much exactly what happened. Yeah. Okay, so why don’t you take us back to the dark days, one year ago? Exactly. Around this time, I think. Just take us, take us through the journey.

Thida 00:59
Okay. So my husband, I, we were together for seven years. We broke up in June of 2011. I’m sorry, not 2011 2021.

Chris Seiter 01:08
We are back 10 years

Thida 01:12
2021. I found your videos, I started binge watching everything. It seemed like nothing worked for me to get I wasn’t utilizing any of your, you know, the programs. And it wasn’t until April of 2022 is when I actually signed up for the program. And I had, I was on a trip overseas. And I literally read the whole book like three times, within a two week period that I was overseas, and I like found your podcast downloaded and listened to everything like probably two or three times within those two weeks of me traveling overseas to Europe. So it was like I wanted to like immerse myself in the program. I joined the Facebook group with mashed up with a battle buddy, her name is Bianca. I were like the closest friends now we talk like all the time, so it’s amazing. It’s awesome support. Nothing seemed to work out. And I would you know, when they say don’t do like the, you know, during no contact, like don’t respond and all that I completely broke no contact, I wasn’t. It wasn’t me reaching out, it was him reaching out. And then me being like, Oh, I’m getting some type of attention. So I should at least respond back. And I literally broke no contact, no contact probably five or six times, like, you know, within like a few weeks in or whatever. And it wasn’t until it was August of 2022 is when I said I’ve had enough and Oh, during this time too. I did everything like they said not to not to do like stalking, paying attention to what he’s doing. Just focusing on him. Like, I don’t know what was going on with me at the time, I was just focused on him. And it wasn’t until like I said, August was when I don’t know something snapped in me and I was just like, Okay, I need to change. This isn’t working for me anymore. So I’m just gonna leave him be go completely, you know, no contact forever. It was for me. And I literally he messaged me again and I literally told him to eff off. And I was like, you’re out of my life eff off. And I just focused on myself. And then that’s was last year and it’s been like six months. And my my life has like take taken like leaps and bounds. Like quantum leaps. I’ve, you know, my career took off people that were meant to be in my life. I feel like people who were like they just matched with you on on a you know, on that level. I came into my life things that were like, you know, synchronistic happen. So, yeah, that’s basically what

Chris Seiter 03:45
happened. So I feel very well, no, no, no, you wouldn’t

Thida 03:50
give up. It wasn’t until I gave up that he came right back into my life. So

Chris Seiter 03:54
why don’t you talk about that, like that the decision that you made to basically be like, Screw this, I’m not doing this anymore. Like I’m doing. I’m doing me instead of yeah, maybe, maybe I should find a different way of phrasing it. No, you’re

Thida 04:07
fine. You’re fine. So like I said, I broke no contact, like five or six times and five or six times and one of my favorite things I always say is in order to change the dance, you have to change the song. And I felt like I was just repeating the same song over and over to where nothing was happening. And I felt like alright, this is too crazy. I just need to let them go. So like I said, I told him eff off and I completely dropped off the face of the earth to him. i He never heard a peep from me. But my social media was still active, I was posting where I was going what I was doing, like I said my career like took off. And and during this time he never from what I thought he was not paying attention. And but somehow he was so somehow he was finding this or somebody was telling him and with after like maybe 60 days of complete silence he messaged me and and basically said like everything a girl in my opinion Listen would have wanted to hear was like I love you. I you know, I regret everything I want to get back together and want to, I want to work this out literally everything or girl could wish in that situation. And I just said no.

Chris Seiter 05:13
So had you guys this is your ex husband? Correct? Okay, so had you guys had sort of an on and off again type relationship. So it was just like you you’re divorced. You’re kind of like, I want to try to find a way to fix this after the divorce. And it’s interesting, did you? Did you ever take one of those attachment style tests online to figure out like what your attachment style was and try to figure out what his attachment style was

Thida 05:40
secured. He’s anxious.

Chris Seiter 05:42
Okay, well, that’s interesting. So he’s anxious. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So

Thida 05:47
the process I kind of flipped from secure to anxious, if that makes any sense, because I was secure before and then it became anxious during the breakup? Well,

Chris Seiter 05:55
obviously, yeah, I think that’s a big thing that most people misunderstand about attachment styles is like, your life circumstances have a huge impact on it. So you can be completely secure. But if you’re in a relationship with someone who’s like an anxious person or an avoidant person, or you go through a very stressful time in life, you’re paying your secure side. Time. kind of anxious. Yeah, it seems like that’s what happened to you. Yeah. We don’t get many anxious exes. So what about him? made you think or realize, oh, he has an anxious attachment style? Maybe marriage? Yeah.

Thida 06:32
always anxious. He was always like, making sure I was okay, making sure that I was happy. Just he had very anxious tendencies, like little things would make him very anxious. So including me, he was always wondering, like how I was doing in the relationship if I was happy, or whatever, you know.

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Chris Seiter 06:48
Okay. So this is another interesting question, I’d like to ask you. So you go through this mindset shift, you know, maybe three or four months after you get into the group or the community, you’ve been paired with battle, buddy, everything seems to kind of be like not working for you. And you change the song to use your own words. When you did that, what was his reaction? Was it just radio silence for however long it took before he reached out and told you everything he wanted? You wanted to hear?

Thida 07:15
It was radio silence from him? Yeah. First for that. 60 days.

Chris Seiter 07:20
And those 60 days, were you checking his social media. You just sit

Thida 07:26
there going? Yeah, by then it was 35 or six times it failed, you know, no contact. And I was just like, I give up. And it was like the moment my energy shifted, and I like went off the grid of that relationship. That was when he came like he’s now back like a rubber band.

Chris Seiter 07:44
Yeah, it’s kind of amazing. I often talk about that a lot on the YouTube channel, which is like, hey, it’s almost you have to like kind of fail and just throw your hands up in the air before, like, all of a sudden, something different happens.

Thida 07:56
something to be said about that. What do you think

Chris Seiter 07:59
it is, I’m curious to get your take because it happened to you.

Thida 08:03
I feel like he felt it energetically the same with like, I like I said, in my post, I, literally every guy from my past within the past four or five months, like even people that I’ve went on, like maybe one date with who don’t even have my number anymore, I don’t even live in the same side of the country. All of a sudden, they found me on social media. And I’m not even saying like, Oh, there’s a handful. I’m talking to like, 2030 people that I haven’t heard from all within a short span of that time. So I felt like there was like, shockwaves that went out into the world. And here they are.

Chris Seiter 08:35
Do you think that was more of an energy based thing? Or do you think it was more of you posting a little bit more frequently on social media and then take paying attention and sensing the energy?

Thida 08:46
I think, while I was my posts have been the same amount. But I feel like it’s energetically because I haven’t changed. Like how many times I was posting or anything like that. It was I the only thing I can attribute it to is energy they sensed it.

Chris Seiter 09:02
Yeah, I mean, you must have been doing something different in the posts, maybe. I don’t know, I’ve always

Thida 09:09
my career took off. Like, you know, I started getting like really big media contracts. I was posting that. So it went from like literally as cuz I do a little bit of modeling on the side. And so I

Chris Seiter 09:19
was just couldn’t tell. So I was doing a little bit of you know,

Thida 09:23
and then I got these really big magazine contracts that like wanted to work with me so I was posting stuff like that. I was making trips around the world like showing different areas of the world that I was going to I was literally just having the time of my life.

Chris Seiter 09:37
Okay, so I guess the content of the post is the most important thing like I guess it’s more intriguing and in your doing more high value things I guess for for men. And so obviously your ex husband was the first one to kind of like, start crawl back to you a little bit

Thida 09:57
but I was a guy too and I broke up with him and he was actually also watching my stuff somehow incognito as well. So

Chris Seiter 10:06
okay, so after you would break up with your dad, let’s talk about this boyfriend that you broke up with I only obvious for

Thida 10:13
for two months he had abandonment issues and I guess to him it was either it was easier to just dump me first than to have me abandoned him later on. I don’t know.

Chris Seiter 10:23
That’s kind of an avoidant. Definitely an avoidance tactic, I guess.

Thida 10:28
But you think it was free to getting hurt? So, you so

Chris Seiter 10:31
you’re saying you all you really had to do to get these guys back was just like, kill it in life? And that just by association

Thida 10:39
100 100%.

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Chris Seiter 10:41
That’s amazing. You know, that’s, that’s, that almost seems so simple. So what like, what, what, what did you do to start killing it at life? Because obviously, I mean, if we back up to the breakup, you quite clearly made a ton of mistakes, broke no contact, we’re stalking him on social media and things like that. Was it a gradual process to get to the, you know, like, Alright, I’m done attitude. And I’m just gonna focus on me like, What are some of your tips for someone listening to this that’s going to be struggling with that aspect of it?

Thida 11:12
For me, I did struggle between April and August, I did, I did struggle. But something snapped. By the time I had failed. No, no contact, like the fifth time that I was just like, I need to, I need to give up because this is crazy. And I felt like I was stuck in a cycle that I couldn’t get out of. So it was when I decided to choose me first. That was the first thing was that there was something energy energetically about me that I needed to focus on myself. Because I couldn’t be giving my energy away to him. It wasn’t benefiting meeting me in any way. It wasn’t making any personal growth. So the moment I decided to pull myself out of there, focus on 100%. Like, I literally did not even think of him I, I I started. People things I did, I started calling them shiny objects. So I needed like different shiny objects to like, fill up my time, so I wouldn’t think of it. And eventually, I think it didn’t get easy until around like 40 or 45 days to where I completely forgot about him at all. So you know, the first one to like 45 days, you know, I would think about him intermittently.

Chris Seiter 12:23
And it took like, what you said like six months? 60 days? 60? I knew. Yeah. For him to come back, I guess. Okay, that’s interesting. And obviously, you said no. So how did that conversation go?

Thida 12:41
He literally just said, you know, like, like I said, everything that a girl would want to hear in that situation. I love you. I want to get back to you. I made all these mistakes. I’m willing to do anything. And I just lit I literally said, I don’t want to do it anymore. I can’t do it anymore. I’ve moved on emotionally.

Chris Seiter 12:58
Okay, so here’s, here’s the big question. You had that conversation with him? After you had the conversation with him? Did he give up?

Thida 13:05
No, he’s, of course not. He actually is one of the very first people to wish me good morning and one of the last people to wish me good night. And throughout like every single day since then, this is probably back in maybe September. I hear from Him every day. He’s he’s one of the first to watch any of my social media posts to comment on them to ask how I’m doing. He’s literally one of my biggest fans now. So it’s actually yeah, it’s actually pretty funny.

Chris Seiter 13:37
So your advice to someone who wants that kind of an outcome is weirdly enough? Kill it at life. Give up on trying to get that back?

Thida 13:45
Yes, absolutely. 100% If I could do it over, or any advice I could give to the ladies and gentlemen. It’s just a complete, no contact, don’t even like bother. Like, it’s not even worth your time you if you want to be stuck. Focus on yourself. And you know, that eventually the universe will give you the ability to choose between what you want and maybe it’s not you choosing them anymore.

Chris Seiter 14:12
Okay, so basically, your tactic is interesting to me, because you I often talk about this concept of like, you know, a lot of our success stories they’ve let go, and then by the time they let go that’s usually when the X sort of comes back. So I’m always trying to teach people to let go quicker so that they can kind of like speed the process up a little bit. And you seem to have Yeah, and I guess that’s the really difficult part. And you said like, all your exes came back though, every single one

Thida 14:45
and more wasn’t just my it was every literally everybody I’ve known from my whole entire existence.

Chris Seiter 14:51
Okay, so this is really interesting because they weren’t coming back before.

Thida 14:55
No. What do you think that was? I can only attribute to energy Okay, do you think? Oh, sorry. Go ahead.

Chris Seiter 15:04
Oh, all right. Do you think it had anything to do with the fact that how long were you guys divorced before you try to enter the program? Sir? I’m just asking. So it

Thida 15:11
was October of 2021 was when at the end of October 2021 was when we divorced. I joined the program April in 2022. So that follow up.

Chris Seiter 15:22
All right. So I mean, it’s all relatively quick, do you think? Okay, so, I want you to think back. I know divorce is kind of a hard thing to look look at. But I’m actually really cute. I’m just following my own curiosity here. All right, so you go through this divorce? Did you see an uptick? And then a number of men sliding into your DMS exes coming back then? Or it was just silent completely?

Thida 15:43
Well, I didn’t let anybody know that I was divorced. So I didn’t even tell my family. I was divorced until six months later. So yeah, so it was it was very, it was a hard thing for me to tell them. And I generally don’t keep my private life on social media. So like, nobody knew for the longest time.

Chris Seiter 16:04
Okay, so do you think the exes coming back had more to do with the fact that they realized, Oh, she’s single now? Versus the fact that oh, she’s married? I need to back off?

Thida 16:14
No, because they did? No, no, they didn’t know. Because even then, when I was married, I didn’t post a lot of him because I kept mostly my social media was for business.

Chris Seiter 16:24
Okay. That’s interesting. So basically, your social media strategy was doing well at work, I guess. And I guess even the modeling thing would be work too, right? Yeah, you’re getting paid for it. So. So you get well at work. And I’m wondering if there’s also like, a social aspect to it. Like, you know, there’s like a certain prestige to getting a magazine contract as a model thing. I don’t know what you do. And so that’s not your full time gig, right? No, I’m a marketing director. Okay, so you’re killing it at work getting these contracts and everything you’re posting about them. So you clearly got the wealth aspect of the Holy Trinity down, did you do anything like health and relationships related?

Thida 17:05
I lost like 30 pounds. Within that time, I got into like, the best shape of my life. Like I said, I I did things within that short year, that probably I like, I couldn’t have done within 10 years, like prior. Like, I felt like everything was just like, condensed into that one year. So like I said, I lost weight. I my career, like skyrocketed didn’t just take off, it skyrocketed. Everything that I said I was going to accomplish. I did all within that year.

Chris Seiter 17:39
Okay. So and you did go on dates with other people too. Yeah. Right. I did, how many dates Okay, so basically, you just went all in on this trinity concept and posted about it on social media, which created the energy necessary for the ex to be like, something is different. Yeah. Okay, that’s interesting. Why did you guys break up originally,

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Thida 18:11
he had a, he also had to had abandonment issues. But he had an ex, he just kept coming back year after you’re at, you know, like a kind of like, the one that got away type of thing. And I just felt like there was always something off. So that I mean, he didn’t cheat on me or anything. But you know, I broke it off because I said, you know, if she’s always going to be there in the background somewhere, you need to go and figure that out. So that was why we divorced. He actually did go back to her and figured out that’s not what he wanted. Of course. Yeah. So.

Chris Seiter 18:44
Yeah. Okay. That’s interesting. So how long were you guys married? Five years together? Seven, five years together. Seven, you break up you broken up maybe for like, seven, eight months by the time he’s coming crawling back. But

Thida 19:02
dating multiple other girls too. So they were multiple other women.

Chris Seiter 19:08
Okay, but I guess they never compared to you.

Thida 19:11
Yeah, I guess not. Especially you’re so Yugi right.

Chris Seiter 19:16
Yeah. So basically, you just killed it. So what was the motivating drive to because I think the hardest thing for people in the community is like, doing the stuff like taking that first step because they’re they’re just so crippled by grief, depression and everything that goes along with the breakup. Would you like like so you lost 30 pounds, right? What is your motivation to get up in the morning? Go to the gym when you’re just like, I don’t want to do it today.

Thida 19:44
Yeah, at first I didn’t. I felt like I had to hit rock bottom first, in order to stick with the program because even when I read through the program the first time when I was on that flight, I even like kind of just skimmed through the Trinity. Hey, I’m admitting it because it’s like, because you know, it’s easier to not work on yourself, right? Because people were like one of everything but work on yourself. And it wasn’t like it. Like I said, it wasn’t until like, I really just had to be so fed up that I wanted change so badly that I was just willing to say, Hey, I love myself more right now than I love him. So I need to dedicate the energy I was putting into him into me. And for me, I had to hit rock bottom.

Chris Seiter 20:30
And for you hitting rock bottom, that just caused a shift of was there any kind of like revenge aspect to it? Because no. Okay, so for you, it was just all about myself, like, I’m done thinking about him. I just need to take that energy and put it into myself.

Thida 20:47
Well, yeah. And plus, if you’re putting that revenge energy out there, it’s kind of a negative energy. I didn’t want it out. And so I wished him well, I wish you know, I don’t think ill of him at all. Like I said, because we talk like every

Chris Seiter 20:59
day now, you’re a lot kinder than most people, I’ll tell you,

Thida 21:02
I mean, I don’t like putting that bad energy that bad juju out there, because eventually it’ll come back to you. And I just focused like said on 100%. Everything to do with me. And I saw I wrote a list of all the things I wanted to accomplish. And literally everything on that list, including having this conversation with you, is complete, you know. So it’s like, well, what else now? I can have another list?

Chris Seiter 21:26
Yeah, I think so. I mean, like, what, what is it that you want at this point? Do you want to get remarried to someone like, what’s your overall relationship goal?

Thida 21:36
You know what, I’m actually really happy where I am right now, I’m still single. And I’m not in a rush to be in relationship. I’m not even looking, I’m just focusing on feeling good every day, and making sure I’m being the best human that I could be. So that’s where I am at in life. I’m just happy where I’m at.

Chris Seiter 21:54
I feel like your success stories, one of the more important ones that we’ve had, because it really hammers home the point I’m always trying to make, which is like you really before you talk to your ex, you really need to get to that place. Mostly, we’re just like, I’m okay. All right. And you seem to have embodied that. But it took you hitting the rock bottom. And that took a while, you know, so I guess the the big thing that I’m curious about is that journey for you to actually hit rock bottom, you know, making a lot of the mistakes like what? Why would you keep making the same mistakes? You know? Like, why wouldn’t Why did it take you so long to change? The song, I guess, is what I’m asking.

Thida 22:39
For number one, because time, you know, as time goes by, during this time, like I said, I failed probably five or six times, you hear from them after not hearing from them. And you’re so wishing that the relationship could be back to where it was that you’re you’re basically forgetting yourself just to do something that you think would bring them back into your life. And like I said, it was after being hurt for so much seeing him try to move on to with other women, you know, he’s dealing with things his own way. And it was just just being hurt. At some point, you got to be tired of being hurt. You got to be tired of feeling sorry for yourself. And what’s not working for me like that timeframe was just too incredulous to be upset or sad or angry. So like I said, it was like one day a light switch just went off. And I was a completely different girl the next day.

Chris Seiter 23:32
What about your battle buddy? Did your battle buddy like also she’s

Thida 23:35
in a relationship. Now she’s, she’s great. Oh my god. She’s the best thing to come from that program. She She is awesome. We talked to each other a lot. She’s in another relationship. Now we would we would have conversations where like, she’s like, Okay, girl, you need to talk me into not texting him or whatever. And we back and forth, or, you know, so many hours with her many, many hours.

Chris Seiter 23:59
Did her ex also come back or ask for her back? At some point? Actually,

Thida 24:02
he didn’t. But she moved on. So I don’t know if he would have because now he’s all you know, she’s in a better relationship. And he’s all over her social media. So I don’t know if he would come back.

Chris Seiter 24:13
So I guess it’s a it’s a happy ending for both for both parties. Which is great. Yeah. So the battle buddy, you felt like the battle buddy aspect of the program and the community was the best. The best part that that level of accountability, I guess is is there?

Thida 24:31
Yeah. Because, you know, during any type of like a big breakup, you kind of feel like you’re going crazy, right? None of your family members want to hear you talk about it. You feel like there’s nobody to talk to. And so so to be in a community of 1000s of individuals who are going through the same thing, you feel less crazy. And you feel like you know, you have something that you can talk about because you’re all going through the same things whereas your family members, they’re only going to tell you just move on but it’s like they don’t have to Anything that come after that, you know, whereas, you know, you actually have a program of the steps you do after, you know,

Chris Seiter 25:08
right? Well, you know, I think the the community aspect, I’ve been thinking a lot about the community itself. And I think the reason it works so well is that there’s like three layers of accountability, you know, you have the peer to peer accountability, which is like you in the battle buddy. But then you have like the veteran accountability, which is like people who’ve been through it, and are still there and kind of providing their advice. And then you of course, have like, the coaching accountability, like the experts that are coming in and doing that. And I think that’s really the real big value of, of the, of the community as a whole. But it seems like you, the big part of your journey from understanding is like hitting rock bottom, having that be the realization that I need to move on. And then actually moving on and then seeing the results, but not just seeing the results. Like oh, I really wanted this like seeing results like crazier than you ever expected, like every single guy you’ve ever dated trying to ask for you back. Which is pretty,

Thida 26:07
pretty fake moving on, you know? Because like, yeah, you it’s like the moving on without moving on. Right? Yeah. There’s something to be said for that. And I did try to move on. But it like I said it was moving on without moving on. And that didn’t work. It literally something must have kicked in energetically. It wasn’t until that snap in me happened, that light switch happened, that everything else fell into place.

Chris Seiter 26:32
Yeah, so that you can’t this isn’t a fake it till you make it type thing. This is like you actually have to do it. And then once you do it, things will be better for you. But I think the hardest part for people listening to this is taking it on faith because it’s like, it’s an outcome that they they don’t know, there’s no guarantee that will happen. You know? So what can you say to someone like that, you know, you’ve lived through it,

Thida 26:57
for me like holding on is like adding resistance to that wire, right? The more resistance, the more resistance you add to a wire, the energy can travel through it, because there’s resistance, once you let go, once you release that resistance to energy flows better. So I kept thinking that during this program, I said I just need to let go because I’m adding resistance. And I mean, I did it for months, kept telling myself that for months. And like I said, you have to reach for me, it was important to reach rock bottom. And I I don’t want everybody to reach rock bottom, because it’s a really dark place. But for me, that is where I can say, hey, this is where I changed. It wasn’t before that.

Chris Seiter 27:36
I love the story. You’re like, you’re like parenting everything that I’ve tried. But see, here’s the thing, like, I’ll do a YouTube video and I’ll say in making the exact points you’re making, but I don’t feel like it gets through to people. And I think that’s because if we’re going to use the energy terminology, I have a too much of a masculine energy. And sometimes you need to have a feminine energy come and like be like, oh, yeah, works. Like this is the way to do it. And I think for you it worked almost a little too well. Like you almost have too many options now.

Thida 28:09
Oh, my God, my girlfriend’s joke about that all the time. Because literally too many options now. Whereas before, it was like nothing. And now it’s it’s incredible, like my life completely flipped completely.

Chris Seiter 28:22
Yeah, I mean, what is it like now for you? Like going forward? I know you you don’t have any plans to kind of get married, which of course is what everyone says before, right? Before they find that guy and

Thida 28:34
I am. I am opening open to anything the universe brings my way. I’m not gonna stick with my abundance anymore. But I’m gonna do what feels natural, you know? And what feels good.

Chris Seiter 28:46
Okay, well, here’s the hardest question I’m gonna ask you. Let’s say you are in a situation where you find the perfect guy, and then he breaks up with you. Do you feel like you would make the same mistakes over again? Or do you feel like you’d be quicker to hitting that rock bottom and doing what worked last time?

Thida 29:03
No, I would let him go. Because Because if he wants to go, he’s not mine. You know what I mean? I can’t I can’t keep him there. And yeah, we’re relationship like it’s a two way street. So I just got to let him go. And that’s one of the things from the program to that I’ve learned it’s releasing things that are not meant for me. And you learn that like I said, through all the failures of you know, the things before that and so yeah, I’m, I’m better at releasing things now. Not just people but anything.

Chris Seiter 29:34
I mean, I don’t know what to ask you. We’ve summed up everything so perfectly. Is there any like final words that you want to tell people struggling through these breakups like to help them and help them see the light but there is a light at the end of the tunnel?

Thida 29:47
Yes, for me, it was I failed so many times. And I know something you can tell people that but they most people they learn through their own, you know, through their own trials and tribulations for me if I could do it all over again. And I would go, no contact right away. Like I said, for me, it didn’t start getting better, I started feeling better until day like 40 to 45. So but before that, you know, those days prior, they were horrible. And for me like the last time, the things like that made going, no contact better was finding like shiny objects like start, like save your Trinity finding, make a list of things you want to do places you want to go, I traveled the world within this short timeframe. So I just started checking off everything on my list, just anything that I could do to take my mind off of things. So the days would go by and after, after a while it you know, you don’t realize oh, it’s day 45 Or day 50 and 60. And it was it was when I least expected it was when he had sent me a message asking, it was like, because for me, I was like, I’ll never hear from him again. And so it was really surprising. And it’s the same with the last guy that I dated for a few months. i The moment he broke up with me, I just said okay, and that was the last words here for me was okay. And then it wasn’t until like, I didn’t fight didn’t anything. I just let them go. 80 days later, he came back the same. I still love you. I want to get back together. And by then I I had already Wow. Yeah. So

Chris Seiter 31:21
So you have been through it again. Where are you?

Thida 31:25
I said, Okay. I said okay. But I would have no argument.

Chris Seiter 31:30
I think that I so this is my take on it. I think it worked because that is a secure response to a breakup. Okay. And then you didn’t give it to any of the anxious side that maybe like, I’m going to try to win him back or anything, which is like pestering him instead, it leaves more of an impression to have a girl say, okay, and then go off into her life. Yeah, it was

Thida 31:55
that radio silence for me. Okay, two to two letters, radio silence for 80 days, like I was, you know, he didn’t, to my knowledge, didn’t check my social media. But he was somehow checking my social media so they know what you’re doing. And what do you think they don’t? Yeah, yeah. And reporting it back to other people, you know, but it wasn’t like I was going and asking for it. Other people would come to me, but um, yeah, I just said, Okay. And then 80 days later, he snapped back and just in against that I want to work things out. I still love you, blah, blah, blah. And, again, I said, I’m sorry, but I’ve emotionally moved on.

Chris Seiter 32:35
That’s great. Yeah. Well, I mean, thank you for coming on and doing this.

Thida 32:40
Thank you for having me. You like filled another checkmark bucket list.

Chris Seiter 32:43
The bucket list. The final checkmark, you read. You’ve reached the top of your list. No,

Thida 32:49
you have to make another one. I know this is crazy. This is absolutely crazy.

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