So, you cheated on your boyfriend and now you want him back. As you can imagine, cheating is a very popular topic when it comes to this site so I am going to handle things a little differently since there is a lot to talk about here. But before I get into the nitty gritty I am going to make you a promise. I promise that this is going to be the most in-depth page on the internet for women who want to know how they can get their boyfriends back if they cheated on him. Most likely, if you have a question it is going to be answered here and if you are confused about something please comment in the comments section below (I respond to every single one.) With that in mind, lets begin!

Lets Talk About Cheating

cheating cheetah

Before I give you any actions I think it is important to understand what the average persons reason for cheating is. Obviously, you know why you cheated on your now ex boyfriend (or maybe you don’t.) However, I think it is really important to learn from others. One of the most interesting things to look at when it comes to cheating is the difference between men and women.

Men- Most men will cheat because all they think about is sex (the horny factor.) It’s as simple as that. I have actually had a few male friends that have cheated on their girlfriends for this reason. Interestingly, they didn’t want to break up with their girlfriends because they “loved” them. It’s a simple case of a man’s eyes wandering and wanting something he knows he shouldn’t have.

Women- Most women will cheat because their emotional needs aren’t met. For example, if a woman feels under appreciated or is not getting what she feels she needs she will look elsewhere for it. Usually you will hear a woman say “I was ignored,” “I was lonely,” or “I had no one to talk to” when asked about her reason for cheating.

Here comes the controversial part, I don’t want you to beat yourself up for cheating on your ex boyfriend. I know you are probably thinking “Wait… WHAT?” Allow me to explain in the section below.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?

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You can’t beat yourself up for cheating on your ex. No doubt you hurt him…. probably really badly but feeling bad about the situation is not going to be very productive in winning back his trust. Here comes the controversial part, where I am sure I am going to be fried alive, monogamy is completely unnatural. If you strip a human being down to his/her core you are going to be left with two qualities.

  1. The Ability To Survive
  2. The Ability To Replicate

Obviously, we are going to be focusing on the second quality on this page. As I said, monogamy is completely unnatural. Down to our core we are just not monogamous creatures. In fact, it is not easy to find an animal that is. Now, I AM NOT CONDONING CHEATING at all. I am just using this fact as a reason on why you shouldn’t beat yourself up. Instead, focus your energy elsewhere like how you can get your ex back.

Do Some Soul Searching

soul searching

In this section I am going to give you your first action! YAY! You obviously cheated on your boyfriend for a reason. What I want you to do is to take out a piece of paper and list that reason down. Maybe you just didn’t like the way he was treating you, maybe it was one of the reasons I mentioned in the sections above. Whatever the case you need to be completely honest with yourself.

After you have your reason written down I want you to make a list of all the qualities that you DIDN’T like about your ex boyfriend. Why am I making you do this? Because sometimes people have a tendency to forget the bad times of the relationship and only remember the very best times. Besides, if you cheated on this person because he wasn’t giving you what you needed emotionally or physically and you might be better off trying to move on. Of course, if you make your list and still want him back then I can help you with that too.

Time To Calm Down

calm down

I am not going to lie to you, if you cheated on your ex and he broke up with you then getting him back is not going to be easy. In fact, you may have to turn to my PRO System for help.

Expect to meet some resistance in your quest to regain his trust. I am only telling you this because I want you to be prepared and I want to make sure you are up for it.

First things first, if you want any chance of getting him back you are going to have to step away for a while. What do I mean by this? Simple, don’t call, text, email, Facebook or see him in person for at least 30 days. I know that seems a bit harsh but to be honest most experts recommend 90 day no contact periods. Your first reaction, especially after knowing you did your ex wrong, is to call constantly to try and patch things up as soon as possible. That is the last thing you want to do because most likely your boyfriend is going to be extremely angry at you, in turn, making you angry as well and when emotions run high logic runs low.

Throughout this site I have recommended the 30 day no contact rule but since you are in an interesting situation I am recommending it to you for a different reason than everyone else. Usually, I am telling women to “freeze out” their ex for thirty days for their own personal healing (and to make their ex a little antsy about why you won’t call them.) However, in this case I am recommending it for an additional reason, your exes healing.

Have you ever been cheated on? If not then trust me when it say that it really hurts. You feel betrayed, not good enough and insignificant all at once. If you are thinking “but guys are tough they heal faster” that kind of logic isn’t always true. If a girl cheats on her boyfriend it is going to hurt him as much as it would hurt a girl if she found out she had been cheated on. So, by implementing a 30 day no contact rule you are going to accomplish three things.

  1. You are going to give your ex some time to heal.
  2. You are going to give yourself some time to think about if you really want him back (and time to heal.)
  3. You are going to make your ex feel a little antsy about why you aren’t calling.

What Do You Say To Someone You Cheated On?


When the time finally comes to reach out to your ex significant other what exactly are you supposed to say? How do you contact them? With a call, facebook message, text message? In this section we are going to discuss all of these issues and I tell you exactly what you need to do to put yourself on the path of redemption!

First things first, DO NOT APOLOGIZE. Not only is this a horrible way to start off but apologies don’t mean anything anymore. If you really, in your heart, want to get your ex back you are going to have to show them why you are sorry with actions. It really is, actions speak louder than words in this case. Of course, you are going to have to use words when you reach out to them and I highly recommend you do so through the power of a text message.

Texting is the preferred method of communication in this case for a number of reasons.

  1. For one, it is impossible to get angry and raise your voice through a text message.
  2. Secondly, texting is a very private thing for people. It is the best way to get someone one on one in a conversation.
  3. Thirdly, and most importantly, it gives you time to think before you send each and every text message.

I don’t recommend calling your ex because I feel it is too much too soon. You have to earn the right to call your ex boyfriend and you can do that by slowly using text messages to build up to a point where he would feel comfortable accepting your call. Think of how you would feel after someone you loved cheated on you, called you out of the blue and blitzed you with a “hey do you want to go out?” I know, it would freak me out. I recommend checking out the page on what to say during texting for more information.

Ways You Can Earn Back His Trust


You have an advantage, since I am a guy I can tell you exactly what I would like to see from a girl for me to even consider taking her back if she cheated on me. Now, I will admit that this is based on personal preference so what I would like to see from a girl who wronged me might be different from what your guy would like to see but I like to think I have a pretty good grasp on the “average” guy out there.

I have to say WOW!

Whichever way you face it, men are very visual creatures. As good of a guy as I am I still appreciate the looks of a beautiful woman. (Now, her personality could be horrible and completely turn me off but that is another story.) If I were to run into an ex and she looks horrible (gained weight, dressing horribly, etc) I would think “thank goodness I am not with her anymore.” However, if I run into an ex and she looks better than she ever looked before I am going to begin thinking “my god, she looks amazing.” As much as she may have wronged me, that will always be in the back of my mind. It is completely shallow, I know, but I promise most guys are going to have those thoughts.

A Sense That I Am Most Important (Even If I’m Not.)

Expect there to be a lot of trust issues with someone who has previously been cheated on. You are going to have to go out of your way to reassure them that you are trustworthy and the best way to do that is with your actions. This is going to be a little controversial but whoever you cheated on them with you are going to have to probably cut out of your life, that is the level of commitment you are going to have to show to your ex. Expect there to be friction any time you go out with other guys (even if you are in groups.) COMMUNICATE that every time you go out for fun with another guy that it is strictly as friends. DO NOT catch your ex (or soon to be new boyfriend 😉 ) off guard. Make sure you warn him ahead of time before you go out with another guy. I know this is a major pain, but you are going to have to do these things if you really want him back.

Slower Is Always Better Than Faster

This section is more about advice for you, take things slow. Usually, people who go too fast tend to make major mistakes that they can’t recover from. As you have probably realized, it is a slow climb up the mountain to getting your boyfriend back. Each step needs to be carefully thought out and there are no guarantees. However, the slower more tactical women usually are the ones who make it to the top.

One More Thing

I put together probably the best resource on the internet detailing every step someone should take when getting their exes back. The guide took me two months to complete and is 20,000 words long but I highly recommend that you check it out if you are interested. Find out how to get your ex back for more information.

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1,943 thoughts on “You Want Your Ex Back After Cheating On Him…. Here’s What To Do”

  1. Avatar


    July 20, 2020 at 10:50 am

    I cheated on my boyfriend in the past ever since then it has been hell for me, he always accuse me of cheating and always accuses me of masturbation too which am clearly dont doing…. I have owned up to my mistake in the past many times he will not still stop accusing me now am confused i dont know what to do again !!! I NEED ADVICE PLEASE I REALLY LOVE HIM AND I DON’T WANT TO LOSE HIM…PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 25, 2020 at 8:10 pm

      Hi Sandra, the issue is that your ex is now paranoid and does not trust you. This is something that you need to sit and discuss with him. If he can not trust you then the relationship is never going to work no matter what you do. He needs to choose to put this behind him or walk away

  2. Avatar

    Joy Cee

    July 10, 2020 at 4:15 pm

    I do not really cheat on my boyfriend, we had issue and we do not talk to each other for a month, then during this process his friend asked me out. And I told his friend that it will be foolish of me to date you knowing that you’re my boyfriend friend even if we are no longer together again I can’t fate you because you are his friend and you guys are staying in the same room. So later on I and my boyfriend come back together again, my boyfriend friend was shocked seeing us together again. Later the next day that my boyfriend friend called me on phone that “hope all his conversation with me are save? And I asked him why he say so!! Then he reply that he wouldn’t want my boyfriend to notice that he asked me out, that let us assume it does not happen, because if he found out it, it will not be funny. He never new that I’m recording the call, and even I have vomited every to my guys that very night we come back together. So what am saying is this, i and my boyfriend come back again at that time, then later somethings came up that let my guy friend get to find out that I’ve disclosed everything to my boyfriend on how he ask me out, you remember earlier that when i mention he said it’s not gonna be funny if he found out. So I don’t know what lies he says to my boyfriend because they are staying together. So that was how my boyfriend go mudy on me, he doesn’t talk to me even if I talk to him he will not respond, if he even manage to respond it is going to be negative. So I’m suspecting that guy, my boyfriend friend, when he said that it’s not gonna be funny if he found out that I tell my boyfriend about our conversation. Later my boyfriend accuses me of stolen his money when I visit him, and he knows me that I can’t do such a thing by taking his money without his permissions, and truly that period I lost my job but I wasn’t the one who took his money.
    I have try to find out from my boyfriend but all he told me was that he do not love me again, but I can see it in him that he still like me. I try to visit him sometimes but he kept rejecting me and tell me not to waste my time on him, but though he still talk to me maybe he’s going out in case of the door. I wrote him a later that if he want me happy then he should stop saying that I’m wasting my time or he should not let me go.
    One of his friend went on awear of me pleading him on my behave, but he was still emphasizing on what happen between me and his friend,.

    I still love him and have him in my mind, i really want him back in my life.
    Because he’s a very nice person, he’s too real, perfect and cares about my future, I have never since I started dating, date his kind before.
    I love him and am missing him, since before lockdown of this global pandemic of corona virus at that march month, me and my boyfriend has been in this issues.
    Thanks so much for this privilege.

  3. Avatar


    June 30, 2020 at 12:09 pm

    I cheated on my boyfriend and he caught me. We’re 8 yrs together, I felt like I was ignored, I’m asking his time always, but when he caught me, I figured it all out, was it me that I was wrong? Like didn’t I see that he’s making his best to give me time?

    2nd I’m always the one who go to their house, I love him, I really do, it’s just I blame myself for seeking more that resulted to cheating 🙁 I cheated for one year, but the other guy is from another country.

    Now we broke up but still have communication, he’s still talking to me, asking me why, but I’m here, patiently answering him back and apologizing that I’m really sorry for what i did. I really wanna win him back, to rebuild his trust again.

    He wants to talk to me thru phone call, we’re both crying sometimes, he doesn’t want me to go, but there are times like he seems to push me away, but I stand still because I want to fix everything and win our relationship back again. We just talked today like more than an hour, talking about everything, and I kept on enlighting him that we can make it through and start over again

    Any advices, what am I going to say or answer if he asks me “why”
    How to comfort him when he’s crying? (I cant help myself but cry too when he’s crying :’()
    Please help 🙁 I want to win him back

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 3, 2020 at 11:34 pm

      Hey Iels, so you need to be honest as to why you cheated, its going to hurt him, but once you have answered this fully as to why you cheated. Then explain that you regret your actions and are sorry. But you do not think it is healthy to go around in the same circle, so you want to work on him forgiving you and working past it, or you need to take some time apart so that he can deal with the emotions he has right now. You NEED to go into a No contact if he does not want to be together and reaches out to you again about “why”. And this is going to be hard, you MUST stick with your No Contact for at least 30 days

  4. Avatar


    June 29, 2020 at 4:30 am

    Hello Chris, I had read your post. Thanks for the wonderful words but I think my case is a bit different and I am confused. Yes I cheated on my boyfriend actually we were engaged and we even have a baby. It has been around eight months so I decided to reach out to him but he has bluntly told me he doesn’t want nothing to do with me because of the pain I put him through.However, he keeps giving me mixed signals e.g. he calls and talks to me sometimes, send me pics with his daughter and I get confused. Can the fix the relationship rule still work?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 3, 2020 at 11:53 pm

      Hey Brenda, you say you have a baby? Or is it just his daughter? I think he is being civil if you share a child and you jumping straight into trying to get back together he is going to shoot you down. I would suggest that you start following the program, reading articles that apply to your situation. Even if you feel that he is giving you mixed signals at this point you need to work out why you cheated, what was missing from the relationship that made you feel the need to go to someone else. And then work out if that reason is going to happen again. You need to read some texting articles and work your way up the value chain and the fact that he is still hurting from your actions means that he may not have forgiven you yet

  5. Avatar

    Sally k

    June 15, 2020 at 6:57 pm

    I cheated on my boyfriend….but never took it seriously…. I really love my boyfriend and I want him back

    P.S.i love u❤️

  6. Avatar

    Michell Mt Malasha

    June 12, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    My boyfriend broke up with me 2 months ago,we been dating for 2years and 1/2.he saw some texts in my fone from another guy who i tolerated more than i shld have.(micro-cheating is the word)we spoke abt the breakup and he seem to have his mind made up but i really want him back.and show him that i can be a better woman .thats so not me

  7. Avatar


    June 12, 2020 at 12:41 pm

    Hi All.

    I had just gotten out of a five-year toxic relationship where my boyfriend cheated on me & made the other girl pregnant. January 2019, was when I ended this relationship. From February 2019, I had just begun University, and in the process of still recovering from my previous relationship, I met this guy. We continued to vibe, without the title up until July, we then started dating in August.

    This was the first time I was away from the house, I stayed at res, I partied and smoked a lot. We partied together half the time and did all those things together. However, while we were vibing I hooked up with my ex again, it meant nothing but it’s almost as if I needed the closure. After I hooked up with my ex, it never happened again. I realized that was all I needed. At the time, I thought it was okay because, the guy I was vibing with, we had no title. There were two instances where I was with friends, and a guy kissed me, but I didn’t entertain anything further. This happened twice at different points in the year (2019).

    I stopped drinking and partying when we started dating in August 2019, as an attempt to change into the better person and never do something like again. In December 2019, I went away with family and then with friends and cheated twice. I knew I had thrown away my relationship for good with my boyfriend. I felt so guilty, but I suppressed it. I stopped drinking and have been clean the past 6 months, I don’t smoke anymore nor do I party. Due to the quarantine in South Africa, it’s like my guilt has overcome all my emotions. I felt the urge to tell him. So I did. The whole thing. I can’t help feel bad for him, I feel like our souls are being drawn to one another (weird, I know). He loves me still, I am his very first girlfriend and I just broke his heart. He still wants to be with me. I just can’t shake this heavy feeling off my chest. The reason why I kept this a secret for so long is because, I wanted to show not only him once he found out but also, myself, that I have bettered as a person. I’m not as reckless as I was.

    How do I stop myself from feeling this way? Do I walk away from him? Do I allow him to walk away from me? I know the best way is to accept that it happened a long time ago but I hate the idea that I was the one that broke someones heart.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 3, 2020 at 10:35 pm

      Hi Jem, so the feeling you have is guilt. Guilt for hurting someone else, I would suggest that you look at your reasons for cheating. Is there something missing that you feel you need to seek attention from other guys? I would also ask yourself if you love this boyfriend enough to be faithful if he chooses to forgive you and stick with you. The guilt feeling is going to take time I think, and if your boyfriend has taken it well, you probably feel bad because you expected some sort of reaction.

  8. Avatar


    June 10, 2020 at 4:42 pm


    my ex found out that I was texting another guy, and the guy told him.. I am not sure what he told him, but the texts were just like “lets have a drink as friends” because the night before we had fought so I wanted to get away and I told this guy lets go get.a drink and was specific about just friends..he told my (ex) and then he blocked me because he felt betrayed.. even though I didn’t even go with that guy. he says he feels betrayed and hurt because that guy just wanted to get in my pants…. we have been talking, he told me to leave him alone and give him space but he’s the one calling me and reaching out to know what im doing, and its driving me crazy..I don’t know what he wants. how can someone tell you to leave him but still worried about what you are doing? he said he can’t be with me because he feels like I just wanted other guys attention and I don’t know what to do anymore. I care for him a lot and I don’t want to leave but I am only hurting myself..

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      June 13, 2020 at 10:47 pm

      Hey Marly, so what you have done is broke your ex / not exes trust. This is why he keeps calling to check on you to see what you are doing and who you are with. You both need some time apart, but in your situation I think you need to be clear with your ex that you either work together to fix this, deleting the male that caused the issue and blocking him as he is going to be the thorn in your relationship going forward. If your ex does not want to get back together right now, then you need to go into a No Contact

  9. Avatar


    June 6, 2020 at 5:51 pm

    Hi can u help M I have a 5 yrs long distance relationship but I cheat him and I wnat him to come back to me and he say to me tht he will be there for m if I need help and he say tht he still loves m but he block m in his phone .. Wht shall I do pls help m some advice so tht I cnat feel pain and hurts too cos I. Still love him even I do mistakes to him .

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      June 7, 2020 at 8:08 pm

      Hi Lyn, if you cheated then you need to understand that you hurt and broke his trust. You are going to have to follow the program starting with a No Contact so that you give them time to get over the hurt. I would avoid posting anything that hints you are around other guys or dating for the time being

  10. Avatar

    Kasim Deborah

    May 25, 2020 at 3:39 pm

    Hi, my bf is this caring and loving guy, he proposed to me December 2019 and we did how introduction feb 2020,but after the introduction he changed, he stoped calling as b4, the caring was not there anymore, I called him explain to him am feeling lonly..he apologized and we move on yet to changes, this make me go out with my co worker … He calls texk and the caring was so much, my fiance found out about it and I apologise but he is still very mad at me, he even refuses to touch me ….. Like I irritate him pls I need advice on wat to do and how to get my fiance back

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      June 7, 2020 at 4:13 pm

      Hey Kasim, so when you spent time with your co worker did you cheat? If so then you need to understand that you broke his trust and that he is going to find it difficult to be with you in a certain way for some time. You are going to have to be patient and allow him time to deal with the fact that you were with someone else

  11. Avatar


    May 3, 2020 at 3:18 am

    I need some good advice on this situation. Everything is personal and I dont want to post publically. Thanks. Jenn

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      May 3, 2020 at 10:01 am

      Hi Jenn, so there are a few options here

      1 – you can post and ask advice with a fake name, and I can advise best I can

      2 – take a look at the products here including one to on coaching, the private Facebook page where a number of mods will be able to help you in group, you can again make a fake profile to use this group so that your identity is protected

  12. Avatar


    April 20, 2020 at 1:54 am

    Hi, in need of help! My ex and I were together for a year–extremely happy, minimal fights, very attached to each other, madly in love… then the month of our one year he started to get really busy with other things and couldn’t make enough time for me so we started to grow apart emotionally which led me to find that fulfillment in a co-worker (emotionally). I immediately alerted him that I was having thoughts for someone else and was second-guessing our relationship (clearly misguided and blinded) but I reassured him that I would remain with him because I loved him and as for the other guy, that we would only be friends. Shortly after while my needs still weren’t being met, I went to make plans to hang out with the co-worker behind my boyfriends back with no intention to do anything which we didn’t but my boyfriend later found out and was very mad. I expressed to him that I was really confused about what I wanted in life relationship-wise and that we should break up so I could “explore my options” and see what I wanted. (I obviously made him a second choice and belittled him) The co-worker and I had our fling and things ended and I went running back to my boyfriend who forgave me and took me back although he was reluctant. After him throwing it in my face a couple of times in the two weeks after getting back together and him being withdrawn from me I started to feel like things just weren’t going to go well and we would end up breaking up. I started talking to guys online out of desperation for a connection (only wanting a friend) and ended up making plans behind my boyfriends back again to meet someone who I again intended for nothing to happen with. After talking for a couple of hours he convinced me that things were never going to work with my boyfriend and I should just give up (he only said this to get me to have sex with him), and after being fully convinced I cheated on my boyfriend again. I told him that night and he said he would never take me back but after two days of apologizing and convincing him to give me one last chance he agreed. And then 2 weeks ago out of the blue when we were doing well, after an argument he stated he needed time to find himself and that he was never over the cheating situations and never wants to get back with me. I was stupid and begged him to stay and even went to his house to beg him but he stood his ground and now I’ve just been doing no contact and don’t know if I should even bother anymore or what to do next.

  13. Avatar


    April 16, 2020 at 7:31 pm

    Need a advise

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 17, 2020 at 3:10 pm

      Hi Lathika, if you post to your situation here and I will advice best I can

  14. Avatar


    April 10, 2020 at 6:25 pm

    Thanks for sharing these ideas
    It is very helpful

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 11, 2020 at 11:30 pm

      Thanks Anjali

  15. Avatar


    April 7, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    I met my boyfriend back in 2015 and we first broke up in 2016. During our breakup, i started spending most of my time wirh my male best friend.

    When we got back together, he started hinting that he doesnt ljke me spending time with men. I found that unbearable because he broke up with me for no apparent reason. Plus, he was my first everything. I felt that he didnt appreciate me as a woman.

    We broke up again in 2018 because he cheated on me. Now here’s the funny part. He is convinced that i betrayed him(and i swear on my life that i didnt) but i can’t prove that i didn’t. Now we are back together though, but he is not thrilled with the fact that i still talk to my male best friend.

    What amazes me is why he feels that i did something dirty with my friend when he also has female friends. I seriously dont appreciate his attitude and im tired. I love hi, but im really tired.

    If possible, i would like to go back to having the healthy realationship before everything got messed up. Do you perhaps have any advice on how I can do that?


    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      April 11, 2020 at 11:14 pm

      Hi there, so the issue I think is he has a guilty conscience where he is worried you are going to do to him, what he has done to you. The most important thing here is that you do not stop spending time with your best friend, if you wanted more with him then you both would have made something happen when you were single. Your guy / ex needs to realise that. I would look up a local couples therapist if you want this relationship to work, but it sounds as if he is holding guilt for his own shortcomings nothing to do with you

  16. Avatar


    March 15, 2020 at 3:29 pm

    I cheated on my boyfriend with my boss. It happened for about 3 months. And in January he found photos of boss and me in Google Photos. We couldn’t stay no contact. We are talking but sometimes he’s positive saying we may get back. But sometimes he’s like he will find someone else. Most of the time we are talking as we were used to.
    I need him back. Will he be mine?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 17, 2020 at 8:38 pm

      Hi Daffy, have you looked at the reason you felt the need to cheat on your boyfriend in the first place? There must have been something missing in the relationship to make you tempted to go else where. If you want your ex back then you are going to have to be open and honest with him and earn his trust back, this is going to be difficult if you are still working in the same place with your boss.

  17. Avatar


    March 12, 2020 at 3:27 am

    So I was talking to this guy and we stop talkin the end of last year so I met somebody else and we was good and one of the kids as abou my ex and another day the other kid said he just left now the one I’m talkin to now was like he knew I was still messing wit him and I told him I’m not I don’t want him that I wanted to be wit my new one but he don’t believe me how can I get him to believe me and trust me that it’s only him I want

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 12, 2020 at 12:56 pm

      Hey there so if you told the new guy the truth and he still didnt believe you then there is not more you can really do until his emotions have calmed. Allow him space and to come to you first, or reach out in 30 days

  18. Avatar


    March 3, 2020 at 5:44 am

    i was talking to this guy for a few weeks and one night we were at a party and my ex was there. everyone was drunk and my guy had to go to bed bc he had to get up early. so my ex tried to kiss me and i pushed him off and told him to stop, and he did. i remember we were talking to each other and i was showing him how to solve a rubik’s cube. there a big blank space that i don’t remember, and then i remember going to bed. people who were there that night are saying me and my ex had sex, but i don’t remember anything like that happening. i told my guy that my ex kissed me but i pushed him off and said i don’t remember anything more than that happening. he believes the people who said we had sex, and now he doesn’t want to be with me anymore. i want him back, and i don’t know what to do.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 7, 2020 at 10:04 am

      Hi there, so you need to allow your guy to process the information and let him decide if he wants to come back to you. If not then you need to follow this process. Stick with No Contact for at least 30 days.

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    February 29, 2020 at 10:43 am

    I had a long distance relationship with a married guy, and it was so difficult because I felt like (or I was) just a side chick, knowing that he has a wife who posted “married life” stuff about them on her social media, and he always went back to the apartment he shared with his wife. Although he had been telling me that he hadn’t touched his wife for awhile and that he was working on separating amicably from her, things didn’t seem to progress and I told him we were done. We didn’t talk for over a month, and during that time, I met another person to get over him. Of course, this is never the right way to get over a person because I never got over the married guy. We reconnected, and started spending time again. One day, he asked me if I had slept with another person before we reconnected. I told him the truth, and he got mad and left me. He finally explained over a text that he loved me, that his wife moved out that weekend, that they broke the news to her family, and that he landed a job at a place where he and I could be together, but he felt like an idiot for doing all this because of what I did. I explained why I did what I did and asked him for another chance. He told me, if I wanna show him he ever mattered anything to him, to never contact him again. I haven’t contacted him since because I want to show him that I truly care about him, but I’m afraid to contact him again. Can I still contact him after the “no contact” period, or should I work on getting over him?

    Thank you for reading the long post.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 12, 2020 at 11:13 pm

      Hi Iris if you want to try get your ex back then following this program is the way forward for you to give yourself the best chance of getting him back

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    February 25, 2020 at 11:47 pm

    I cheated on my boyfriend that I been with for 10 years with 3 kids about 4 years ago. Around 3 months ago I found out he has been talking to a female for hours and cheated on me, he wants to break up because he keeps thinking about the time I cheated . Still live together in the same house because of the kids, I want to make things work but I feel like he really is interested in this other female. What should I do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      March 2, 2020 at 11:02 pm

      Hi Teresa, it sounds as if your partner has a grass is greener syndrome but is trying to use what you did in the past as justification. As you want to make the relationship work, and he is currently focused on the other woman you have to allow him to leave and go into a limited no contact, where you only speak about the house responsibilities and the children. Read about the being there method and there is also an article about limited no contact and how to follow it when you share children

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