1,987 thoughts on “You Want Your Ex Back After Cheating On Him…. Here’s What To Do”

1. 

   Elizabeth

   August 11, 2013 at 3:41 am

   Hello, so my recent ex boyfriend and I have been together for 5
   Months. I cheated on him last night with my other ex
   Boyfriend who is now home from the Army. He blew up immediately and wants nothing to do with me. I understand the reason you say 30 days os a good amount of time to wait to get him back. But, I am not sure if he is blowing me off so harshly because he really doesn’t care about me now that I cheated or because he is trying to hurt me as bad as I have hurt him. I messed up by blowing his phone up all day and basically begging him for a second chance. I realized that was not helping at all and he basically said his goodbyes to me through text message. I really want him back and I will do anything to do so. Do you think there is any hope for me? How can I make him see (after the 30 days) that I really am the girl for him?

1. 

   admin

   August 12, 2013 at 2:10 am

   Well, if I was cheated on I would still be really mad. It is one of those situations where you really have to step away and let the other person calm down. However, the real question is “why did you cheat on him?” Obviously, he wasn’t giving you something you needed.

2. 

   Holly

   August 10, 2013 at 3:38 am

   I cheated on my boyfriend. We dated for about a year just talking, he said he didn’t want to make anything official because of all his work he was doing kicking off his career with marketing, his clothing line, acting, and moving to LA. Well he moved to LA and we kept talking, once I told him I had seen other guys he was very upset for a few days as he thought we were only seeing each other (which he admits to never making clear), then I suggested us to be officially together. Bad/good idea. The relationship was fine long distance until the 6th month (when I am moving this month which will be the “7th” month to go to college 15 mins away from his apartment). I told him I cheated. I cried and cried. He knew I was depressed this summer, had a slight drug addiction I was dealing with, having problems with work/finances, having trouble figuring out if my college would still accept me(which they did) because of poor grades, my mom was diagnosed with cancer, and my dad has been verbally abusive most of my life and I’m still living at home. I became extremely depressed, had a few suicide scares, and I didn’t want him to know I was at my worst.. He only had a slight idea. Every time we talked I was hearing how great he was doing and I didn’t want to bring him down. When I told him I cheated on him, these past 4 weeks I’ve been calling, texting, everything constantly. I know I looked desperate. I almost tried to use it to my advantage but that was pointless. He said we’re done and we would maybe talk when I moved down to LA and maybe we’d get back together one day. I had some replies with texts, few phone conversations and that’s about it. Now I’m trying the thirty day rule. I just hope I haven’t broken it. The great thing is I’ve already changed my hair and yes a lot of guys have been after me and he knows this via internet. Other than that I have to just try all your great tips. I just really hope I didn’t ruin my chances, I mean I looked really desperate and would not give him room to breathe for a while.. but he also was there for me when I had some real anxiety attacks he knows I get and was telling me to breathe and calm down, just like he would if we were together. Other than that convos have been him getting angry, feelings he doesn’t want to feel. My plan is to not contact him till after I’m settled into my living place at college and have a good foundation with roommates and friends, school and still going out for fun even if we’re in the same area. Hopefully I’ll be lucky even though I looked so desperate and broke all your rules at first, I mean I still got some good responses from him but for the most part he kept telling me he needed to breathe and I couldn’t let him. But now I am… so only time can tell. What do you think though?

1. 

   admin

   August 11, 2013 at 2:58 am

   I am really glad you recognize that being desperate is a turnoff.

   I think the only thing that can help in your case is to give him time. It will take a lot of discipline but I think you should give it a try if you really believe in your relationship.

3. 

   Elizabeth

   August 7, 2013 at 5:54 am

   Almost 3 months ago, my boyfriend of 6 years found out I cheated on him almost a year before. Not trying to make excuses, I was going through a hard time then, dealing with depression and my dad being in and out of rehab and I made some bad decisions. I regretted it immediately and just didn’t want to tell him, which was a huge mistake. He was devastated when he found out, but at the same time he wanted to make things work and made it very clear. I did also, but I was also trying to still deal with my depression and it was hard to put my all into making things right with him. He knew this and said he understood and still wanted to make things work. 3 months later, he found out another thing I lied about, me getting accepted into grad school and hour away from him (I didn’t tell him bc I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go at the time). After that, he was hurt even more that I could still lie to him after everything, but even still he said we could make it work somehow. He did say though that he needed some space to think about things. We still hung out and talked for 2 weeks after that, and then suddenly we didn’t talk for 3 days. I texting him a nice text with no response. I basically went “crazy” and called and texted a million times wanting an explanation for why he was ignoring me but he ended up blocking my number. I want things to work out with him so bad and always thought we would get married…is it too late to get him back? I feel like I’ve ruined any chance by calling and texting so much, but I just didn’t understand the sudden change of heart. He has always been so good at telling me why he’s upset or angry I just didn’t know what to do. Please tell me what I can do at this point to fix things!

1. 

   admin

   August 8, 2013 at 1:57 am

   Well, it’s not great that you called and texted too much b/c now he perceives you as desperate and that is not an attractive quality.

   What do you think about trying out No Contact for 30 days and evolving during that time?

2. 

   Elizabeth

   August 7, 2013 at 6:01 am

   Needed to add that it really just isn’t like him to ignore me. He has always been so in love with me and I’ve never questioned it ever. Even after I cheated he said he still wants to be with me forever but I just needed to try to fix things with myself to make things work. I feel like those 3 days he maybe found someone else? But I don’t understand how he could after loving me so much for over 6 years. I wish I had started with the NC rule, but I didn’t. I even emailed him a couple times after he blocked my number. And I feel like that has ruined any chance I have.

4. 

   Morena

   August 5, 2013 at 7:10 pm

   It was not my intention to hurt him like that but he felt hurt. This has been so hard for me to del with .

5. 

   Morena

   August 5, 2013 at 7:04 pm

   Well he thinks I cheated but I didn’t in his mind . I was with him for 4 years and it been a month since we broke up we have a son together . I did not cheat on him a couple of time I asked advice from a male friend and he got up set with me. He says he loves me but is not in love with me due to me talking with male friends. It sent him off . Since we broke up he was Intimate 4 times . But he says he wants to be alone . But I want to be with him but he doent want the same thing . Iam very in love with him. I need help

6. 

   Scarlett

   August 5, 2013 at 5:31 pm

   Hello,

   So me and my boyfriend have known each other since Freshman year and that is when we started talking too. A year into it, we finally got really serious and shortly after we fell in love. After that, school got in the way especially for me and things have been rough. He’s really overprotective of me and a very stubborn guy, he doesn’t forgive easily. Though I have messed up a couple of times, he still kept me no matter what. We were each others first and I know he loves me alot, especially when things were good. But I messed up big time, and I don’t know how to express my sadness I cannot believe how I out of all people can do such a thing. I cheated on him. And it was a mess. I didn’t have sex with the guy, I just cuddled and held his hand. I think I did it because I felt like my boyfriend (now my ex) didn’t give me enough attention. I did everything I , I stayed and I fought for him, and after a while he took me back. I thought things were going to get better, but 2 months after I cheated on him, he asked for a break and then this break turned into a break up. He tells me he will always love me and that he wants me to leave room for him so just in case he wants to come back. I cried alot and I made a mistake by trying to reason with him and beg to get him back. It was until today that I found this website…even after countless hours and days doing everything I’m not supposed to do, is there still a chance, if I implement the NC rule today? He keeps on telling me to stop talking to him and that he will easily find someone better then me and someone who won’t cheat on him and it really hurts. I’ve seen him a couple of times after the break up and when we were together it feels like nothing has changed but afterwards he still wants space. He says he doesnt know if he wants to be with me or not. He wants me to leave him alone and let him meet other firls before he makes his decision on coming back to me. He still loves and cares for me and he tells me he will always be here for me. But he keeps on blocking me out.Yet when I emphasize that I’m going out and all this stuff he starts questioning me like he still cares. Like saying why? And what are you doing? On the other hand he is extremely stubborn as I mentioned earlier and it seems like he has no none in his body to forgive me. He says it’s not the same since I cheated on him. I honestly don’t even know if he will ever forgive me. He holds grudges forever And he tells me he doesn’t want to be with someone that cheated on him yet he might want to get back together with me. It’s just so confusing and I don’t know where to start or what to do.

1. 

   admin

   August 6, 2013 at 3:28 am

   He is really hurt that you cheated on him that is understandable. Give him some time to work through this. His feelings for you are still there but you might be better off doing the NC just to let him come down to earth a little bit.

7. 

   Melissa

   August 4, 2013 at 7:51 pm

   My boyfriend (now ex) have been dating for over 7 years. I cheated on him because I felt I was being ignored by him and I’ve tried talking to him about my feelings and he wouldn’t listen and that led to me cheating on him. We broke up about 4 days ago. It is the hugest mistake I’ve made. I’m going to try the NC rule but I don’t have his number because I had to cancel his phone line. So I would have to email him. He told me he would contact me when he is ready, but I’m afraid that he won’t. I want him back so bad. And it hurts me that I’ve hurt him.

1. 

   admin

   August 5, 2013 at 3:37 am

   Email isn’t ideal but in your case I think its what will have to do.

2. 

   Melissa

   August 5, 2013 at 6:55 pm

   Should I try to NC rule or should I just wait out and let him contact me like he said he would?

3. 

   admin

   August 6, 2013 at 3:29 am

   Hmm….. I am a believer in the NC rule.

8. 

   Rachel

   August 3, 2013 at 5:44 pm

   I cheated on my boyfriend of over a year, we had moved several times in the year and we gave up everything to start new careers. I was scared and super insecure. I cheated on him a couple times..I feel horrible. I was very emotionally distraught and I wasn’t in a good place when I did it I couldn’t see that he was really trying with me. I thought he had stopped caring. Now he lives in NY and I am moving to Florida. I want to get him back but I know I hurt him so much. I can’t stop thinking about and he’s literally been in every dream of mine for the last month. Going crazy! Help!

1. 

   admin

   August 4, 2013 at 3:15 am

   The moving thing can hurt you. But have you tried the NC rule yet?

9. 

   Sam

   August 2, 2013 at 2:52 am

   I cheated on my boyfriend because I felt neglected like he dident want to make time for me. Then the next day he broke up with me(not knowing I cheated) and told me he wanted to be friends? .. Then after that I had to confess I cheated and I did and he was really angry told me to give him time and after time he found a new girl but told her he still loves me what is going on?

1. 

   admin

   August 3, 2013 at 2:43 am

   He still has feelings for you but is really hurt you cheated on him so he is caught in limbo.

2. 

   Sam

   August 2, 2013 at 2:58 am

   And how do i make him drop this f$#% buddy girl of his for me. How do I make him come back to me. I know he loves me but he acts like he hates me.. He wanted to hangout awhile but then he started ignoring me so what should I do?

3. 

   admin

   August 3, 2013 at 2:44 am

   Have you tried the NC rule yet?

10. 

    Brooke

    July 29, 2013 at 5:18 pm

    Me and this guy were off and on for over a year. We dated January 14,2012 we broke up for 8 months and decided to get back together July 27,2012 we broke up August 17 because I cheated on him at a football game with my ex boyfriend. I had lost my grandmother the day before and my mind wasn’t where it should have been. From then on we have went our separate ways. We’ve both dated other people. He is currently in another relationship. We haven’t really talked for 3 months. He messaged me a few months ago and told me he still loved me, but he couldn’t leave his new girlfriend. I’ve done everything to win him back. I’ll do anything to have him back. I just need him to trust me again. PLEASE HELP.

1. 

   admin

   July 30, 2013 at 2:05 am

   Ask him out for a one on one hang out.

2. 

   admin

   July 30, 2013 at 2:05 am

   Well, the fact is that he is still with the new girlfriend. I think what you need to do is work on creating a bit of attraction within him. Do not cheat with him on the new girl because that is bad karma. However, you are going to have to create enough attraction without cheating so that he wants you back so badly.

11. 

    Lauen

    July 27, 2013 at 9:29 pm

    I cheated on my boyfriend the first week we were dating and kept it a secret from him for 3 months. When I finally decided to tell him he decided to give me a second chance to prove to him that its worth it. I haven’t cheated or ever even thought about cheating on him after I did. Its only been two weeks since I told him and he’s still very upset which I understand. We are long distance and seeing each other in two weeks. I just want to be able to gain his trust back and Im not really sure how to do that long distance. I really want to be with him and I really want to work this out. How do I work this out with him? and how do i get him to trust me?? Help! Help!
    Thank you!

1. 

   admin

   July 28, 2013 at 4:30 am

   Hi Lauen,

   I think you would do well by surprising him in person! Only if you are still dating though.