The Simple 2 Step Method To Get Your "Baby Daddy" Back

383 thoughts on “Here’s How To Get Your “Baby Daddy” Back”

Amy

March 17, 2021 at 10:41 pm

So I’m currently 22 weeks pregnant and single… Been with my unborn baby daddy for 7 whole years, we were a perfect couple… Than last year we both decided to try and have a baby and we did. When I told him I was pregnant, he seemed like the happiest man a live. But than he’s behavior started changing he started being rude and uncaring with me. I wanted to abort the baby but he begged me not to, he said a child would strengthen our relationship and I decided to keep my baby as I also wanted it.

Than this year, January he broke up with me, that he thinks it’s best that we both stay separated. So that left me heartbroken, devastated and later learnt that he had moved on, seeing someone else. Do I have a chance of getting him back or should I just move on with my life? Last night we had a little chat and he asked me how his unborn baby is doing… Please help out

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 24, 2021 at 8:31 pm

Hi Amy so if you want to try and get your ex back or move on that is your call, I can advice you either way in what you decide. I would suggest that you take some time to work out what is going to be best for you and baby rather than you and him, and make sure that you are a happy Mamma before anything else as that is what is most important.

Sierra

February 21, 2021 at 6:26 am

I’m so happy I found this website. It’s helped a lot the last few days. My ex and I were together for almost
5 years. We have children together that are still in diapers. 2 months before he walked out on us we were having a rough time. I found out he was distant because he’d talking to other women and was starting to feel like he wanted out. I was beyond devastated but I said if he was planning on leaving he needed to do the right thing for me and our kids and just tell me. He said thats the last thought I should even have. I knew our relationship had been taken over by routine, parenting, chores and us never getting much of a break or time together. 2 months after that suddenly he’s leaving to move in with another woman. He went back and forth at first about us working on things and I made the gigantic mistake of begging him to come home to his family. For 3 weeks I’ve been no contact except about the kids and try to seem like I’m moving on. When he comes to see the kids he is either here at our house (the same house we lived in as a couple) or wants me to go if he takes the kids anywhere which I don’t understand because he now he acts like he’s moving on for good with her. Shes a late 40 something year old that works for him. I’m 29. I’ve been reading and listening to your podcasts but I’m still so worried I’ll eff everything up. Do I even have a chance at getting him to come home back home to his family?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 23, 2021 at 3:47 pm

Hi Sierra, so stop going with him if he wants to take the kids out somewhere, and if he stays in your house. Leave. Let him see what it is like to be a single parent without you around helping him! Let him feel that pressure! Stick with a limited no contact starting from today for 45 days. Work on yourself, do as much as you can with the Ungettable information. There is a chance you can get him back, but you need to make him realise you are not sat around waiting while he spends time with this other woman! Check this article out to give you some extra help – https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-back-when-you-have-a-child-with-them/

Cindy

February 20, 2021 at 5:52 pm

Hi there,
I just discovered this site and it is very informative. I have a situation. My baby daddy and I were together for a few months. I am now 6 weeks pregnant. When we met we hit is off amazing well. It seemed to good to be true. The perfect relationship. His family loves me. They told him dont lose this one. I have really strong feelings for him. As does for me as well, he constantly says “I love you”. The problem is he has 2 kids with his ex. Her and dont get along. I notice him and I get into an argument he goes to his ex and says he wants to spend time with his kids. Which I dont have an issue with. It’s her I dont trust. Also, I feel that he has an escape route to go to when we argue. I told him how I feel and he still keeps going there and its pissing me off. Now after I told him I was pregnant he said it’s up to me what to do with the baby. I told him I wanted his support at the appt and the delivery. But, he became distant and want to take things slow in the relationship. But, it’s so hard for me to use the no contact rule when I only live next door and I am friends with his mom. Actually I met his mom first a couple months before I knew of him. My feelings are really strong for him. I have an 11 year old daughter, her father is not in our lives at all. He has moved on and remarried. We have no communication at all. Now for my baby daddy #2. I dont want to go through alone AGAIN. I want us to work things out for the baby. I dont want to have another child with no father. I’m sorry but how is that going to look on me with 2 kids and no father. If this one doesnt work out. We have broken up 1 time and got back together 2 days after. Now i feel that i am losing him because of how much i am fighting to keep us together. Please help me figure this out. I would really appreciate the advise. Cause I really miss being with him.

Thank you

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 7, 2021 at 2:47 pm

Hi Cindy, so the worry you have about “how it’s going to look” there are many many people out there who are raising kids alone so try not to focus on that. Your focus needs to be that you and your children have a happy life. With or without a man! The main thing is that you work on yourself, and realise your worth. If he wanted to be with her, he would be with her. You need to understand that if you want to be with this man then she is going to be in his life full time until his children are grown. You want your relationship to work you have to let it go, as hard as it may be. You do not have to get along with her, but you also do not need to speak with her either. You say you’re losing him – so you are not broken up right now you just need to show you are secure and not needy or clingy.

Nympha

February 17, 2021 at 11:42 am

Hey guys am nympha, my ex and I have a 3months old baby…we broke up when I was still pregnant and he decided to be with his first baby mama…she foundout about me and his baby and has done her best to cut my child’s father off from me and the baby…I try my best to talk to him and he also talks to be but told me to give him time because of his first baby mama he claims she checks his phone and whenever she finds out he has contacted me or talked to me she has fights with him and in return he distances himself from me…so one time I asked him why he was distant from me and his daughter he told me he was being blackmailed by the woman and that because she was his first woman he bought assets and opened joint accounts and also have joint shares on everything he owns…he told me he was afraid to loose his assets and money and also his son whom he had with his first woman…actually he told me she threatened him using that as an excuse so due to his fear to loose his property and son he talks to me in secret and asks me not to call or text him and only wait for him to contact me…he also told me to give him time to figure things out and claims went he solved his issues he is going to come find me and his daughter…I really don’t know what to do…please advise me because I love him and want us to raise our daughter together what can I do????

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 19, 2021 at 12:25 pm

Hi Nympha, while I understand your situation is difficult. If he wanted to be in your childs life he would not let another person stop him. So while she has a part to play he is also to blame here. If he does not want to lose his access to his child and his “assets” then he should sort that himself so that he can spend time with BOTH his children, not just his son. Regardless of the other woman. Your daughter should not be missing out because he has a manipulating ex!

Ivy

February 16, 2021 at 5:21 pm

Hello,Ivy here,
So,my bd whom we’ve been together since 2016 recently told me he didn’t feel anything for me for those years we were together..everything was okay,until last year when he went to another city for work..He stayed there and I got to realise that ever since he went there,he met up this girl whom he told that he didn’t love me and that he used me to get over a heart break and that the pregnancy happened during that time..our baby will be 4yrs this year and he says that he loves the other lady and that me and him will never work out..he told the other everything about me and my baby and apparently,the other lady is the one pushing him to say that he will co parent..should I just let him be?!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 19, 2021 at 10:02 am

Hi Ivy, you need to follow the limited no contact rule where you only speak to him about your child otherwise I would not engage in any conversation with him. This needs to be for at least 45 days if you want him back then you need to read and learn about the being there method. Check out this article to help you along the way – https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-back-when-you-have-a-child-with-them/

Jasmine

February 11, 2021 at 9:09 pm

Hi my name is jasmine, and me and my baby daddy have a 2 month old and during my pregnancy he cheated on me and so we stop talking for a while and we started back . So he “moved on “ and he has a girlfriend now and so he thinks it’s okay to still talk to me and his girlfriend and so I felt like that wasn’t okay because he trying to have his cake and ice cream too. In the beginning I’ve gave him a chance for us to work on our relationship but he told me to wait and be patient until he’s ready so I wasn’t finna do that. So just recently something else had happened and so I told him that I wanted to stop talking to him because of what he did and he was upset when I said that I wanted us to stop talking. But cutting him off I felt was the right thing to do so my feelings won’t get hurt and even though I cut him off I still want us to be together and start back talking and try to be this family that I want us to be, but it’s like he won’t leave me alone but won’t cut her off, I know he wants to be with me (I think )but he won’t admit it ,but how can we move forward when he is still talking to his girlfriend? Or should I just completely move on and focus on me and my child and just forget about rekindling the relationship since he’s not willing to make it work?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 13, 2021 at 10:55 pm

Hi Jasmine, so in this situation he knows he has you both! You need to explain to him that you are not going to be in this situation anymore and that you are walking away, that’s when you follow a limited no contact (only speak to him when it is about your child) and then otherwise follow the rules of NC. If he has a girlfriend then coming to you too, you need to stick to your standards.

Georgia

January 28, 2021 at 2:33 am

My name’s Georgia and my bd broke it off with me after a 3 year relationship and I have our 5 month old son but like a dumbass I begged for him back and he said he needed to think about it what should I do

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 2, 2021 at 8:40 pm

Hi Georgia, you definitely are not “dumbass” it is totally normal for people to ask to get back together. You need to work on your self esteem for some time and stick with a limited no contact. Follow the program and use this if you still want to get your ex back after 30 days.

Alina Motaung

December 30, 2020 at 11:06 pm

Am Lina
I have been dating my baby daddy for almost 8 years now and it’s a long distance relationship,he started cheating with this girl 1 year back when i found out we almost broke up but somehow he mananged to convince me that they broke up with the girl recently i just found out that they still dating. Now he’s breaking up with me and he has chosen the girl he saying he’s afraid of hurting me again. The thing i still want to be with him so please advise

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 1, 2021 at 8:59 pm

Hi Alina, if you want this guy back then you are going to have to work on being ungettable while following the limited no contact period. Going forward when you start to reach out after 45 days you need to follow the program along with the being there method.

Asia Brooks-Smith

December 4, 2020 at 12:35 am

Hello my name is Asia and I need some advice. I want my sons father back and I read the article above and most of the things mentioned as far as the no contact and stuff I do. Here’s my dilemma… I told him two weeks ago how I felt after he left almost five years ago( for personal reasons). We didn’t really break up he just left because he wanted to better himself for his son. We haven’t spoken just general stuff about our son and that’s it. I don’t know if he has a girl or anything but I know during the time after he left he had two girlfriends but things didn’t work out. Currently he’s in Connecticut( still there to my knowledge). The problem is he’s moving back to New Jersey and is working on himself which I’m happy about because I want him to be the best version of his self and I know he’s a good dad. But I feel stuck because when I told him how I felt he was in a way surprised I guess given the whole time frame and how he just left. But he told me he appreciated me being honest, that I was a good mother and that maybe in the future we could possibly be together again but right now he wants to keep focusing on his self. It was a hard pill to swallow but I swallowed it. Since he left I’ve been on a few dates but always felt this guilt because I wanted him back(even though he was moving on as well). I just want to know should I keep the faith and wait patiently or should I completely just move on with my life? I’m truly stuck between a rock and a hard place

Side note: when we met I just turned 17 and he was 25. He already had one child but haven’t been with the mother since before the baby was born and I have his second child. I got pregnant unexpectedly before we reconnected and got together after I told him I was pregnant.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 6, 2021 at 10:10 pm

Hi Asia, I would say that you continue to try to move on while he works on himself as you do not know if in the end he will want to come back. However, you can follow the program and work on trying to get him back, while also living your life, if you meet someone you really like in the mean time great, if not then you can always approach him again.

Luna

December 2, 2020 at 2:39 pm

My Baby father decided that he doesn’t love me anymore after 10 years of being in a relationship with me. We are continuing to live together, because we both don’t have the money to move. My heart hurts, and he is already talking to someone new. I don’t know how to do this without him.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 2, 2020 at 5:03 pm

Hi Luna, it is hard to live with your ex when you share a child and want them back, but you need to follow the limited no contact rules and stick with it as best you can. Read articles on this website that relates to your situation and work on yourself in the mean time.

Omecca wilson

October 19, 2020 at 4:48 pm

I have been with my sons father since we were 19 we are now 22. When I met him he told me he was fighting a case. He had mom issues , out in the world on his own since 17. I took him in my home. We were together 4 months I got pregnant with our son and he went away when I was 8 weeks pregnant. I came to every visit pregnant made sure he was ok. 2 months after I had the baby I went out had some drinks with my friends saw my ex and I cheated. Then I cheated again 6 months later someone else. I just wanted my needs met. I was so tired of being alone. He found out broke up with me was really mean . I went through depression I ended up sleeping with my childhood friend when he came to my house to comfort me . My sons dad came back a month later asking for me back and he understands I was sad but he pushed me away when he found out the way he talked to me he never has and I didn’t know who he was. I was turned off. I continued seeing my friend and going out and for 3 months He begged . He got out of jail came home to be with me and ended up telling him about me and my guy friends affair when we broke up and he doesn’t want to be with me now. He lived with me , went out all hours of the night with girls I’m sure, disrespectful, always throwing stuff in my face . Now he’s coming home decent times , staying out the streets more but it’s still no commitment . He’s here and holds me every night. We go out with the baby , grocery shopping, he did our laundry the other day . I cook every night for him , I do not talk to other guys, I stay home with the baby when I am not at work. We were suppose to get married when he got out now he says he will never give me that or will never get married. And he says we are not together he does not want a relationship. We are still sexually active and living together . He says he loves me and kisses me everyday before going to work or leaving out but he’s just still not there. This is the same person that used to surprise me with gifts and flowers . Never had to question his loyalty or where I stood. Now I just don’t understand. I still love him I always have. I just want him back and committed to me again.
Sparkle

October 16, 2020 at 6:00 am

Thank you this helped me a lot and I’m definitely trying the no contact method
Belle

October 13, 2020 at 1:23 pm

My baby daddy and I broke up about a week and a half ago. He cheated on me and broke my trust a year prior to that, and never made a genuine effort to gain it back, instead he kept making things worse by continuing to hide things, lie, not really being honest with me, and being sneaky. I started snooping through his phone, and he felt like I was invading his privacy, which I understand, but he violated my trust first. Snooping was the only way I could know if he was lying or hiding anything because he wouldn’t be honest with me when I would ask him about something. We ended up breaking up last week over an incident where he called me crazy because I questioned him about his whereabouts (his location showed he was somewhere he wasn’t supposed to), so I told him I didn’t want to be with him anymore. I tried to talk things out with him the next day but he refused to and said that he knows how i see him in my eyes and that the talking phase was over. I really miss him so much, he was my best friend, and when we were good it was amazing. But now he’s acting like he doesn’t care and giving me mixed signals as to whether we’re ever going to work it out or not. We were engaged.
Georgie

September 29, 2020 at 8:42 pm

My little girls dad cheated on me and left me for another girl, he is now seeing her and stays at her house most of the time (all the time) he says he’s happy now and appears to be but he left because he didn’t feel wanted or appreciated but when he mentioned it it was too late and he left, he was screaming at me sometimes shouting “don’t you think my heart was broken, I had the perfect little family and now that’s gone my heart is broken to”
So I know he has gone into this relationship and hasn’t actually had to be along time To think about things And heal. What can I do to win him back over. Yes I’m upset that he cheated but I cannot help that I live the man and we have made this beautiful baby girl together. I want my partner back and to be a family again, please help….what shall I do!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 15, 2020 at 6:13 pm

I get how you are carrying this as a blame situation, but he did not tell you how he was feeling and he cheated, so for him to pass the blame to you is unfair selfish and an easy way out! You need to follow the rules of limited no contact because you share a child, but you need to avoid speaking with him as much as possible for 45 days, allowing him to spend time with this other woman long enough for him to pass the honeymoon phase, which is when you start following the being there method

Pretty

September 10, 2020 at 7:30 pm

I broke up with my BD last month and our son it’s only 1 month he found out that I was cheating on him and then he decided to break up with me and now he is not calling me just to hear how is the child it’s only his grandmother who call me to ask about the child after 3 weeks I love my BD cheating on him was a biggest mistake of my life. I don’t know if he would come back to me I need him in my life we need to raise our on and only son 2gether
Carolyn

August 26, 2020 at 4:02 pm

I am currently pregnant with me and my baby daddy second child. We broke up but I ended up having a weak moment and texting him a long paragraph about how I want us to make it work. No respond, not nothing. Its only been a couple of days that we have been broken. I wanted to give him space but no too much as I was the one who stopped talking to him. But overlooking the situation I seem that I may have over reacted and now he is playing hard to get and ignoring me, and very distant. I hate that I am so emotional but I really do want our family back. I mean, we are having a second kid together and I am tired of the back and forth, break up to make up. We’ve been on and off for about 5 years, and I just want things to right. I mean we both cheated, but we’ve been trying to rebuild. I need your help !!!!
🙁

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 7, 2020 at 8:48 pm

Hey Carolyn, what is the issue is that you are cheating on each other and the back and forth – you are falling into this bad habit of breaking up when things get rough. You need to identify what made you both cheat. And as for wanting your family back together. You are still a family even if broken up. You just need to be willing to work on yourself and learn how to interact with you BD with out arguments or falling outs. Start the program with a limited no contact where you only speak with him about your children (when you must)

Juliana

August 25, 2020 at 9:35 pm

My BD bailed out on us immediately I got pregnant, we kept his family in the loop but they were mean to me and I decided to let them be and accept support from my family and friends. A week to my son’s first birthday, his mom died and I attended her service of songs with my mom and my son. Immediately I saw him I realized I still love but then I don’t want to, he acted cool though and I get the urge to reach out but I want him to apologize and fall for me like crazy but I don’t know how. His son looks so much like him that he couldn’t take his eyes and hands off him but I don’t want to think he can just be the child’s dad without any responsibility from him……I’ll be waiting for your opinion

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 6, 2020 at 10:04 am

Juliana, if you want the guy back then follow the program but I think the lack of interest in being there for his son for 12 months is telling you exactly how he feels about being a parent and active in his life. I would suggest that you consider if this is a person you want to be in a relationship with before opening that door again. IF you do then read articles about how to attract your ex, work on your holy trinity and being ungettable.

Shannon

August 23, 2020 at 8:58 am

Split with my ex 3 weeks ago constant arguing over the same thing he has a problem (alcohol etc) coming before our baby. When he’s sober he wants to be with me but the days I call him out on it he says he’s done, his problem is me. I couldn’t deal with his problem anymore so I eventually told his family and my own. He is angry at me because I didn’t keep it between us but our baby is getting older and I was miserable having to deal with it on my own. His parents were always involved (I don’t get on with them) very false and they were enabling his problem by saying he was drinking because of our arguments (our arguments were always about the child not coming first). I don’t contact him unless he contacts me about seeing the child. I don’t let him take her places due to what he’s done before so he only sees her in my home.
I’m hoping me cutting him off is a wake up call to sort himself out or he won’t be in my child’s life. What can I do for him to regret walking out
And leaving us?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

September 10, 2020 at 7:50 pm

Hey Shannon, to make him regret it, you need to work on yourself, focus on you and your baby and BE HAPPY without him. He will realise that he has lost something great and regret losing his family unit

Janey

August 9, 2020 at 3:28 pm

Split with my ex 2 month ago. Have 2 kids together 2 yr and 8 month old. He hasn’t really got a permanent home at minute. Comes here to see kids we go on days out he stays over stays in bed with me etc. Then says he don’t want me back our relationship was a bit toxic checking each other phones. Not spending much time apart as was always an issue when we were out alone, so we argued far too much but when not arguing was amazing. Went like that for 5 months that’s when he packed up and left, I asked him to leave take a break as I could see us getting worse he said he goes he goes for good he is sticking too he’s word. Don’t want my kids to loose out when he really wants to see them so that’s why I let him stay over etc. But feel like it’s not doing anything for me and him. He says he’s tried to get feelings back since he left but isn’t in love with me no more. he’s basically been with us nearly every day and we text all the time. I’m just going to start limited contact about kids what else should I do I want him back

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

August 11, 2020 at 6:45 pm

Hey Janey, so for this program to work you would need to change some of the situation you have going on. While I understand that it is hard to allow him to have this. You need to let him experience what life is like without you when he has the kids. So if he comes to stay over and have the children. You need to go else where, and if you cant. He sleeps on the sofa. DO NOT share a bed with him again. He currently get the best of both worlds. Family life, and then off to do his own thing when he is not around. You also need to stop the texting, limited no contact is where you do not speak with him unless its about the children health. And then when he is due to arrive for his visits. It is hard to make those changes if you want him back then you need to be strong.

Raye

August 5, 2020 at 5:49 pm

So I was with my ex bf for three years we went threw a lot he was an alcoholic and I helped sober him throughout the 3 years together we had a baby and I found him messaging other women always sorry and stopped then ten months ago found out he had a secret fb account and had met up with a women and cheated he said he wasn’t gonna go back again as in it was a one off but she said he was ,I threw him out and for months up until March he has been trying to get me back then lockdown happened we both decided he wouldn’t see our child at the beginning and the weeks past and a lot of arguing threw text where he’d ask to see baby and didn’t get back to me Then I’d get angry and not arrange for him to see her well Iv found out he has a new gf even though until the day I found out he was telling me he was single I arranged for him to see our child but with me there due to his alcohol issues didn’t wana risk him being alone ,we got on well offered to take me and our child for food I declined then saw him again a few days later bought me and our child trainers I confessed I had feelings for him still And he said he had feelings for me as his baby’s mom and that’s it (whatever that means ) and that he’s moved on so I said I want no contact with him and would have to sort our child out via relatives he dosent listen and then started to tell me when he was free the next week and said see me a few times then if u can’t do it cus of your feeling well sort something out ,He said all he want s his contact with his child so I said ,I’m done ,just message when you want to see her and you can have he him on your own he put ..up to you …is he completely over me

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383 thoughts on “Here’s How To Get Your “Baby Daddy” Back”