How To Get Your Ex Back When He's Moved On To A New Girl

3,819 thoughts on “Has He Moved On? How To Get Him Back If He Has A Girlfriend”

Sylvia

March 30, 2019 at 8:40 am

Hey so i have a difficult case…i was with my husband for almost 6 years but for the last year we ended up getting a cps case against us and i left for that year to get our children back needless to say i was also pregnant and then when i was shipped off to my last program for 1 year he got deported so its been a year and im barley finding out that the entire time hes been deported and ive been sending him money and phones and clothes hes been with one of my ex friends for the entire year!!! So she takes him drugs every now and then but he tells everyone else hes only with me for our girls but to me he denys denys denys being with her…i want him back i want my old husband back who loved and cherished me…i know he still loves me but the drugs are consuming him..he tells everyone he is also just using the girl but ..i cant be to sure…i dont know what to do im being consumed with so much anger and rage..but i still love him…what do i do?!?! Im back up between the sword and the wall …ive been loving a lie for 1 entire year…what should i do..i still love him
Hannah

March 7, 2019 at 11:32 am

I was with my ex for 3 years, we have a 2 year old son together. We both had problems towards the end of the relationship and I developed severe anxiety. I broke up with him 3 months ago because the only way I could heal was to have time and space alone. He had a hard time with the breakup. Now I feel back to myself again and want to try and work things out. The only problem if that he has just told me that he’s been seeing someone for 6 weeks and that it’s going well. This has broken my heart, my anxiety and panic attacks have come back, I just don’t know what to do. I feel like I have no right to feel like this because it was me who ended things.
Angelique Nazareno

March 7, 2019 at 9:47 am

Also, my ex and I have so much common interests. While, he said, the girl he used to date during our first break up, they have very very little common interests. I have also met his whole family, even cousins, and almost always present in their gatherings when we were together. But the girl never met even his parents.
Angelique Nazareno

March 7, 2019 at 9:43 am

Hi Chris,

Please notice me and respond.

I broke up with my ex boyfriend of 2 years last year in May. He begged for me to come back and I didn’t heed him. After a month, I learned he was dating a new girl. Even while dating the girl, he kept on texting me every now and then. But I told him to stop texting as it was going to be unfair with his new girl. But then, he would text me again and then I would initially ask him back but then he would refuse, and then I asked him again to stop contacting me. As I read through your articles that I should do that. And that went on until September last year. During no contact period, he posted this girl twiced on social media. I heard he was speaking ill of the girl though thru our common friend. Until December last year, we finally met, after 3 months of NC, in an event hosted by our common friend. I said a simple hi and smiled which he returned too. After the event, he texted me that it was good to see me and all, days passed and he said he wanted to give our relationship another go. So since I still love him, I gave him another chance. He left the girl for me. And so, when we got back together, which only lasted for more than a month (he broke up with me this February 17, 2019) because he said I was too possessive and I’m stressing him out and putting so much pressure on him. I told him it was just a phase because he had another girl during our separated times and that it will eventually wear off as time goes by. At first he understood it and bear with me. We would fight over and over because of my jealousy. But the last one was the biggest fight of all that led him to break-up with me because he said he was now unhappy in our relationship because of my consistent jealousy. He said he wanted to be single and focus on himself and that he didn’t want to have relationship with anyone yet. He also said that I shouldn’t wait on him until he’s ready. Until recently I learned that he was communicating again with the girl he got involved with in our first break-up. I confronted him and asked about it, he said he was just apologizing to the girl because he felt guilty of leaving her out of the blue. But that he has no plan of dating her again, he was just feeling guilty, that’s all. And that for now he wants to be single but he said he’ll tell me right away if ever he will meet someone that he would date when he’s ready. Thats stings a lot. I want him back for the second time, but I’m worried he might get back with that girl. What should I do? Please respond. I need your help! 🙁

Chris Seiter

March 8, 2019 at 2:36 am

Hi there Angelique…I know its hurts. I think before you make any decision on how to proceed, you should put your energy to some healing and recovery. You have tried NC and yet he has still not been a reliable partner….now saying he want the single life. Take NC for yourself and make it all about you. You can’t control what he “thinks” he wants or what he will do. Take some time just for yourself should help you with gaining some perspective of the entire life cycle of the relationship.

Kate

March 5, 2019 at 9:03 am

My ex and I were an opposites attract couple. One of the problems we had was that we had were that we too much that I wanted/liked and not enough for him. Based on what I see on fb, he and his new girlfriend (not sure if rebound or not) are a lot more compatible than we were, and she is more adventurous/kinkier in the bedroom. We have kids and see each other a few times a week and get along well. Am I delusional to think we can get back together?

Chris Seiter

March 5, 2019 at 10:54 pm

I don’t think so. This other girl could very well be a rebound a time will reveal that soon enough. But meanwhile, you should be making use of an ex recovery plan, so take a look at my Pr gram!

Shay

February 13, 2019 at 12:15 pm

Hi
how can no contact be productive if my ex has clearly moved on and has told me he is in love with her? we get on great but staying in contact clearly isn’t working but wouldn’t no contact just make him feel much more at ease and go forth pursuing this person?
Thanks

Chris Seiter

February 14, 2019 at 3:36 am

Hi Shay! Consider implementing the “Being There” method. I talk about on my site, but you an reach out using my “Contact Form” (link at very bottom of each website page) to get more info about how it works for your situation.

Kim

February 12, 2019 at 9:18 pm

Hi Chris,
My ex and I have been dating for 3 years. We both always felt like we had a special bond and were each other’s best friends. Only I understood him and only he understood me. Everything was going great until I lost a lot of my close friends due to them having to move. About half a year later, in early 2018, my self esteem slowly began to fall, maybe because I didn’t have my friends around helping me. Then in the fall of 2018 I got so incredibly insecured with myself that I began bringing it into our relationship. My ex already had many many family responsibilities along with school and work, so I was just stressing him out more. I got so possessive, clingy, and got upset over every little thing. I would get mad at him and made him feel bad. He began to feel like he didn’t deserve me and felt like I would be happier with someone else. Then around December he started to develop a crush on one of his female friends. They had a good open friendship, meanwhile he felt closer and trapped in our relationship. This is what leads me to think that he only likes her because we lacked something in our relationship and he’s trying to fill up that missing piece. The girl he had a crush on actually had a crush on him in the summer or 2018 and when she confessed to my ex he didn’t feel the same way, in fact he felt it was best for them to stay distant until she feelings for him were gone. It wasn’t until we had problems in our relationship that he began to like her. The stress got to him and he broke up with me in mid January. It’s only been 3 weeks now but he’s already trying to be in a relationship with her. I’d really like to know your thoughts on this situation. It hurts so much because it’s one thing to lose a boyfriend and another thing to lose a boyfriend who was your best friend. And I’m currently doing No Contact! Any advice?
Tiffany

February 9, 2019 at 3:36 am

Hello Chris,
My ex-boyfriend (29) and I (24) were together for 2 year with 1 year being long distance. We ended our relationship mutually and peacefully when we realized we were not going to live near each other anytime (I moved back to Illinois and he stayed in California) soon knowing both of us want marriage and children. We still have each other on all social media (Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram) and have not contacted each other since the break up 7 months ago. He is in a new relationship which began 3 months after our breakup. I personally have not thought out him during this time until his birthday on January 22, 2019 (Yes, I remember because it is in-between my brother’s and father’s birthdays). During our time of no contact, I have been doing a lot of self-care. I personally did the big chop in 2017 to go back to natural hair and working on my physical health losing weight. In 2018, I was 5’1″, a whopping 190 lbs, and waistline of 42″. Today, I have shoulder length curly hair (and growing) and now at healthy weight of 125 lbs with an hourglass figure (Bust 42″, Waist 21″, and Hips 42″). In addition, I have been given an opportunity to move back to California this June 2019, which would allow reconnection with my mother’s side of the family and college friends. A little background I was born and raised in California but spent my high school and post college days in Illinois because my immediate family and dad’s side of the family lives here. When I initially saw the first posting of their relationship, I was geuinuing happy for him to find a local girl who will love him. But creeping into the new girlfriend’s profile, as an ex would, I discovered she was single-mother with 3 kids and the complete opposite to me. I know I should not care but what I know from hours of our deep conversations about marriage, kids, and money I got a sense she was rebound until the relationship continued. He has stopped posting her since November 2018 but she posts about him (Yes, I creeped again to be accurate my comment). I thought in the 7 months of no contact I moved on from him and healed but really I just put my feelings on hold till I was at personal best (Hair, body, and financial goals). Now that I have reached my goals, I find myself thinking about him and us getting back together since distance will no longer be barrier come this summer. But I have not made any moves because as lady I will not be home-wrecker texting/calling him. If I put myself in her shoes and that would be a no go me if my man was texting/calling an ex. Yes, he still views my Instagram and Facebook stories every time I post but really could that mean other than him bored or just curious into my life post-him? I personally want to post my new sexy body on social media but that has never been style even before the weight. I also thought about posting my plans to move back but is 3 and 1/2 months so I don’t know. I want him back but I can’t tell if he wants be back after 7 months of no contact and his new girlfriend. Your thoughts of what I should do?
Sincerely,
Confused Ex-Girlfriend

Chris Seiter

February 10, 2019 at 1:06 am

Hi Tiffany!

That is a heck of a story! A lot going on. I have so much to say, but so little time. I recommend you dive into my 485 page ebook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” as it hould help you in many ways whether you get your ex back or not.

Kellee

February 5, 2019 at 9:34 pm

Hi there, my ex and I broke up just over a month and a half ago. Not even a week after breaking up he was dating the girl he cheated on me with. Him and I share a son together. How can I be sure that his new relationship is just a rebound? He has already told me that she is possibly gonna be his wife one of these days. Is he just saying that to freak me out? This past October he had brought marriage up to me when we were at my friends wedding. So is he playing games with me? But I also wanna know if he misses me at all and if it wants our family back at all like I do. Cause I want nothing more then to have my family back.

Chris Seiter

February 6, 2019 at 1:26 am

Hi Kellee…I know its extra hard when you have children together and I am sorry your ex has said such insensitive things to you. Time is the arbitrator when it comes to which relationships stick, so as to whether this other relationship is a rebound is largely in the hands of time. Are you implementing No Contact?

AJ

February 3, 2019 at 3:44 pm

Dated a guy for 3 months and it seemed like neither of us were in the right place at the time. We then fell into a feiends with benefits trap for the past year and he has also started seeing someone else. Is it too late to do ko contact and try to start this all over and win him from his current girl? The physical attraction to me is clearly still there and other connection has increased, but he says he needs to see where it goes with this other girl. We are all in the same friend circle too

Chris Seiter

February 4, 2019 at 3:55 am

Hi AJ!

So this other girl could be a rebound girl. Time will reveal the truth. I do think employing No contact in the way I teach it in my Program is a practical way forward.

Dee

January 30, 2019 at 6:05 pm

Hi
I and my boyfriend had been together for two years and we broke up once in 2017 but we got closer when we reconciled
And In November 2018 I found out he was cheating and he actually broke up with me and when I tried to approach the girl he attacked me and since then we’ve not spoken again
He tried to talk to me but I didn’t mind him and my bestfriend warmed him to stay away from me and he blocked me afterwards
Do you think he’ll ever get back with me ?
someone need advice

January 27, 2019 at 2:49 pm

Me and my ex dated for about 9 years and we broke up six months ago. I initiate the broke up because i cannot feel he loves me and we are lazy to communicate with each other. But when i met him 2 weeks ago and found out that i still have strong feeling towards him. The sad thing is he got a new girlfriend 2 or 3 months after we broke up. Both parties’ families already know that they are dating and they even went to travel last month. Would like to seek your advice if i still got chances to win him back and how?
Dani

January 27, 2019 at 9:24 am

Hi Chris,
My ex broke up with me a couple of months ago and hooked up with this new girl only a week later. They have been “dating” ever since. However, during that period of time I still had sex with him a couple of times which I deeply regret but cannot turn back. So I never had the No-Contact period. Would it still be possible to do that now? Even if our relationship is already over for quite a while?

Chris Seiter

January 27, 2019 at 9:43 pm

Yes, Dani…I think NC is an option, just as I teach it in my Program.

Monica

January 6, 2019 at 11:45 pm

Hi Chris,
My ex and I broke up 2 months ago because he said he didn’t love me enough. This was the second time we broke up and the first was because I didn’t love him enough. When we started dating he has had a girlfriend for 2 years and he left her for me and told me that I was much better than her. Now I tried no contact period and during it he was always telling me how he wanted to be friends with me but I said I needed time. He eventually started meeting with his ex who he left for me after he has told everybody that she has changed and didn’t like her the way he did before. Our no contact period finished when we played spin the bottle in the dorm because we live together. He didn’t act like a friend but like he wants me again. Then he texted me first and we texted for like 10 days and he told how we should play it again. On January 1st he stopped texting me like I have never existed and I discovered that he has bought a present for his ex and that he comments all of her posts. I considered of being his best friends again and help him with his relationship because that’s how we fell for each other the first time because I was always the shoulder he could cry on. What should I do?

Chris Seiter

January 7, 2019 at 4:44 am

Hi Monica….I know it hurts when the guy your care about goes back and forth on what he seemingly wants. I think you should consider implementing No Contact and utilize my Program (see home page) so you understand how the whole post breakup recovery process works.

Allison

January 3, 2019 at 9:52 pm

Hi Chris,
My ex (I’ll call him E) and I weren’t together all that long before my previous ex (I’ll call him D) showed up and sabotaged our relationship. D refused my decision to stay with my new relationship. He kept pressuring me, guilting me, and ultimately pushed me to take a step back from my new relationship with E to get my head straight (I never fully realized how emotionally manipulative he was, but that’s a different issue).
I spent some time with D trying to see if that relationship could work again, but I knew pretty early on that it wouldn’t. However, I stayed involved with him because I feared he’d hurt himself if I left (and he even guilted me with that when I did leave).
E and I were in touch periodically, and he was still very interested in a relationship and a future with me. Our relationship was great and we were very good together. He told me that I made him the happiest that he had ever been, and that I was “the one.”
Since it took me a few months to finally end things with D, E recently started to see someone else. However, not even a month before he was telling me he wanted a future with me and that getting back together was best for us. I know he still has strong feelings for me, and he knows I still have strong feelings for him He and I don’t really talk, and I believe that’s because he’s trying to give his new relationship a chance. He views all of my Snapchat stories and will strike up a conversation if I run into him at work.
I miss him terribly, and want him back. I have a gut feeling that he’ll be back, but it’s hard to focus on myself. Any advice would be appreciated.
Thank you so much!

Chris Seiter

January 3, 2019 at 11:04 pm

It’s best to have a sensible ex recovery plan in place Allison. Take a look at some of my resources that can show you how to approach this.

Jennifer

January 1, 2019 at 4:34 am

Hi Chris,

My ex and I broke up 3 months ago right before I left for a six-week trip. I tried not to focus on the heartbreak too much during my vacation, but once I returned in the beginning of November, everything came rushing back. I found out he started dating someone else mid-November and is still currently seeing her. Being apart and alone for the first time made me realize and appreciate other things in my life, but not a day passed that I haven’t missed him. Our mutual friend told me the girl is likely a rebound so I’m not sure how I should proceed. I’ve thought about asking him to come to my tournament in three weeks if he’s willing to get back together. If he doesn’t show up then I’ll have my answer and I’ll wish him the best. But, should I hold back because he’s still seeing someone?
Thank you!

Chris Seiter

January 1, 2019 at 5:44 pm

Hi Jennifer!

I am happy for you that you were able to use your alone time to see a bigger picture and appreciate other things in life. In my Program, particularly in my eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book”, I talk about ways of processing how to move on. One can move on, with completely writing the other person out of their life. The future is always moving with different possibilities, so one never knows quite where it will lead. But doing those things that bring you fulfillment and moving forward with life is important.

Allison

December 17, 2018 at 2:26 am

Hi Chris,

My ex (I’ll call him E) and I broke up ~6 months ago. My previous ex (I’ll call him D) came back into the picture and pressured/guilted me into ending my new relationship (to give him another chance). Being emotionally torn, I ended my new relationship with E to “figure things out.” E and I were in touch periodically and he regularly told me how much he wanted me back and how happy I had made him. Although I knew that D and I wouldn’t work, the relationship was emotionally abusive and I stayed “together” with him.

I recently ended things with D to find that E is in a new relationship. However, up until ~2 months ago, E was still extremely interested in getting back together and told me how much he wanted us to work. Now, he actively ignores me at work and won’t have any contact with me. However, he watches all of my Snapchat stories – so I’ve been posting more because I know he’ll watch. I think he’s just trying to see this new relationship through because he feels like he owes it to the new girl. I believe he still has strong feelings for me. Any ideas on what I can do?
Thank you!

Chris Seiter

December 17, 2018 at 10:47 pm

Hi Allison…your ex seems stuck in uncertainty. If you are following my Program you will be upping the ante on your value to make it even more difficult for him to look past you!

Violeta

December 16, 2018 at 12:48 am

Hi Chris,

Would appreciate your advice. I’m 30 and my ex is49 . Huge age gap. We live in same apartment complex. He was separated going through divorce when we met. Started out great we were together for 6 months. But divorce proceedings got stressful and we broke up after few attempts of trying. Been 5 months but he would try to contact me we talked in between. Felt he did try to reach out and said he does think about me.

We recently were bumping into each other. I called to say we should meet clear the air. Well we spoke he said he has a gf now. But wedid talk about us. He said he does miss us how I could just pop to his as I lived in the same block and we would watch movies our shows. He did say our relationship was intense he loved me. His current one he hasn’t mentioned love. He said it’s just for company and it’s just relaxed as she is divorced and has a kid and I guess he’s told her he never wants to get married so it’s easy.

He complimented my hair said I looked good. But does still think of me. He said he had to think logical and that I was way younger and deserve to have a family kids the dream which he realised he can’t provide with me due to divorce and losing financially. He thinks I’m high maintenance and if we met 10 yrs ago he would be in better place and we would be together as he feels we are compatible and do get along,

It was obvious he had feelings for me but he kept saying he’s a broken old wood now and just living life. He did say he was hurt I put up a pic of a guy I dated 2 weeks after our break up. He even described the pic and the guy. He said he’s been through his own battle as it was difficult our relationship was intense. Now he’s in a very convenient relationship he only meets her when he’s free and she’s cool about it.

He did say are you with that guy the bf? I lied said yes cuz I was jealousof his gf. Anyways so Chris do I still have a chance to get back? He has seen a pic of my guy and he said he’s fit and fresh unlike an old wood which he meant himself.

We are keeping in touch through text and he did say it was nice meeting me. How can I get him back? I know he still loves me . Please help.

Chris Seiter

December 16, 2018 at 4:30 pm

Hi Violeta!

It looks like you have been thru a lot. Just think little steps with the texting and work toward a causal meet up. You might want to pick up my eBook, “The Texting Bible” as it has a lot of information on how you can use texting to rebuild the connection.

Joelina

December 10, 2018 at 4:15 pm

Hey,
So my ex had a new girlfriend 2 days after the break up and I was devestaded of course. But 2 weeks later he wrote me that he loves me so much and can’t stop thinking about me. One week after this he was at the airport and went to his home country over the holidays and asked me to come to the airport to give me my stuff back. So I went there and when we saw each other we didn’t hold a grudge. He hugged me the whole time, cried, touched my hair and laughed with me. Which made me hopes. After he went into the gate he wrote me that he wished he would have kissed me and that he already misses touching and seeing me. As soon as he landed in Portugal I didn’t hear anything of him anymore. So his new girlfriend is also in Portugal and since then they are the overly happy couple. Posting pics and doing things he never did with me. So of course I’m heartbroken. In that time he contacted me 2 times. The first time I ignored him and he blocked me directly. The second time I got weak but told him right after that I need time for myself and asked him to respect that. Everytime he wrote me, he posted happy pictures of them together after. What can i think of this. Do i still have a Chance? Im in NC at the moment. But hearing my friends tell me what he posted etc hurt me really bad because even if we had a relationship status he never posted pictures with me. Why is he doing all of this? Should I keep going or is it hopeless because they seem so happy.

Chris Seiter

December 10, 2018 at 11:22 pm

Hi Joelin! I am sorry this is a struggle for you. You need to be first focus on your emotional health. Not sure why he is behaving like this. Could be lots of reasons. The silver lining is it gives you some insight into how he is as a person. I have a lot of great Podcasts and videos that can help you in the healing department. Check out my Private Facebook Support Group as well!

Marie

December 3, 2018 at 1:52 am

Hi! My exbf and 1 dated for a solid 7 yrs and were in a on/off non-committed relationship for 2 yrs before that. He is 32 and I’m 31. This was my first relationship so I didn’t handle it well. He first broke up last April due to a huge fight days before the break up which went on for days and his friends interfered. I found out that they have a groupchat where they were talking about me, badmouthing me and even introducing a girl to him. I got hurt and mad seeing this that I confronted him about it. I was totally devastated and was a complete mess. He said that he want to finish our relationship, he is no longer happy, he fell out of love and that he needed space. A lot of hurtful words were exchanged and I did all the mistakes possible.

After a few days he agreed to continue our relationship but nothing changed because he remained close to communicating and fixing the problem with me so we argued a lot. Come June he said that he really want to stop. We still talk and see each other after that. He was hot and cold with me but remained sweet and affectionate but distant. I was completely desperate and needy. I started limited contact August and continued with complete NC by September for 40 days.

After NC by mid October, I tried to contact him and he was responding really positively. We’ve been texting and seeing each other a lot. It was always me who initiated though. There were times that our conversations leads to him sexting me. When we meet there were sexual advancements but no sex, I think it happened 2x. When I was sick he took care of me and I can still feel that I was still there, through his hugs and soft kisses. He even accompanied me to do errands when asked w/o 2nd thoughts.

By 2nd week of November, he was still replying to my texts but when we need to meet because I need to get stuff from his house, he was cold and distant. I also found out that there were happenings that he didn’t told me about which hurted my feelings. I was open to him about it but not in a desperate or needy way. After that he started ignoring me completely and it turned out that he was out of the country. I was again dissapointed but didn’t nag him about it. I sent him a short message that I was happy to reconnect with him, that I’m not expecting anything, I just wanted to start over and get to know him again. I sent a couple of texts the day after but got no replies so I backed off and started NC again by the 3rd week of Nov. He started deleting and untagging our pictures together on social media.

It turned out that he has a new girl and posted it on facebook just last Thursday and already told his family we’ve broken up. I was really shocked, sad, I don’t know what to feel. He told me that he is not seeing someone even though I already guessed that he is texting someone else. Almost 9 yrs and he’s now in a new relationship after 5 mos. I kept my cool and pushed with no contact (day 17) and posting on facebook/instagram. I actually can hold myself emotionally, unlike before, I just feel sad and I can’t keep myself from stalking them on FB, I’m trying not to.

I still have a lot of stuff left at his house, is it a good idea to get it? His sister is offering to get it for me, or should I just get it after NC? I’m thinking of doing NC until the end of the year, is that enought time? And I’m also thinking of writing a thank you message to her family. I don’t know if I should send it now, but Christmas is coming and I really want to meet his family and say my thanks at least. Is there a possibility that this is just a rebound even after 5 mos? Before doing NC he still kept on texting the other girl that was introduce to him by his friends and this new girl is still not in the picture by that time. The girl is 10 yrs younger than him and looks similar to me. I still want him back but I don’t know if I have a chance anymore. 🙁 I want to wait but I’m not going to hold myself for him. 🙁

Chris Seiter

December 3, 2018 at 9:31 pm

Hi Marie! A lot going on here….I see that you have been thru a lot. Do you have a sensible ex recovery plan that you are following? It would help so you can be assured you are making good strategic and tactical decisions.

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3,819 thoughts on “Has He Moved On? How To Get Him Back If He Has A Girlfriend”