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748 thoughts on “When NOT To Use The No Contact Rule On Your Ex Boyfriend”

  1. Katherine

    March 3, 2015 at 12:07 am

    It’s been 3 weeks since the break up. I could almost sense it coming on. We’ve been together for 8 years and around Christmas a lot of people were pressuring us to get married. This was something I really wanted, he wanted it too but felt he wasn’t ready. I respected that he wasn’t ready but also I would shut down and get upset when people would make comments to us and he would act aloof. We didn’t communicate very well about how we felt about all the pressure. When he broke up with me he used a lot of different excuses that didn’t sound like him. I realize that something had to happen because we were at a stand still and things weren’t growing. Before he even broke up with me I kept thinking I should distance myself to get the ball rolling, and because I realize I have a tendency to be clingy when he gets distant. We met up after 2 weeks to get coffee and talk. It was enjoyable and painful at the same time because we both agreed we are best friends and he worried he wasted my time. I only texted him once and that wound up being a long conversation about everyday things and it was a positive conversation, but I initated it. He has never texted me yet. Now I’ve been forcing myself to not text him and I worry if he will ever contact me. I realize the relationship had to change and am willing to reset. Is it too late or is he just completely over it because he hasn’t contacted me?

    1. admin

      March 3, 2015 at 9:46 pm

      I think he crumbled under the pressure.

      Marriage can make some guys freak out.

      I doubt he is completely over it.

      Ideally in this situation I recommend the NC rule so if you keep doing that you may find your chances of having him contact you are higher.

  2. Marry

    March 2, 2015 at 5:35 pm

    Why do we ex girlfriends get so scared when ex goes into rebound even when we know that it’s a rebound? You know he broke up with me saying he doesn’t have time for relationship because of his job, and after a month he got a new girl. What i realised is that new girl is more interested in him than he is in her, what if she wakes up feeling in him, i’m so afraid..btw i’m in NC for almost 2 months because i don’t want do become their common enemy. What do you think it’s going on? do i even have a chance anymore?

    1. admin

      March 2, 2015 at 10:17 pm

      Its probably because your frightened it could turn into something more… permanent.

    2. Ana

      March 3, 2015 at 9:45 am

      I did’t understand, can you tell me what do you mean by that?

    3. admin

      March 3, 2015 at 10:04 pm

      What do you mean Ana?

    4. Ana

      March 3, 2015 at 9:45 am

      I’m in the same situation

  3. mia

    March 2, 2015 at 3:49 am

    hi chris! My ex broke up with me bec he said he does not love me anymore and his work is his priority now since he’s just too busy for a rel and a lot of people are depending on him for his job. so we broke up on good terms. The problem is that we were in a long distance relationship. I am now in day 8 of the no contact rule. I also unfollowed him on fb (he still likes my posts) I still love him but he’s too busy and with his work, even if he wants me back, he does not have the time for me.. I am following religiously your instructions on being the ungettable girl. But does it all matter if he’s too busy to even notice?

    He is an honest person. He told me point black that he was not attracted to me anymore, our rel was a hassle for his work and he wants to settle down with someone near him so that it would be more convenient. (he’s 29)

    1. admin

      March 2, 2015 at 9:40 pm

      Well, if you two were to get back together this is something I would have a talk with him about.

    2. mfy

      March 3, 2015 at 2:31 pm

      what do u mean? like i will wait for the 30 days till i talk to him?

  4. Sally

    March 1, 2015 at 7:20 pm

    What if your ex never initiates a text conversation? I did NC for a month then for the last 6 weeks I’ve been starting text conversations approximately once a week and I’m getting increasingly positive, engaged responses (flirty on one occasion). Should I worry though that I am always the one to initiate the conversation? He never texts me unless I’ve texted him first.

    1. admin

      March 2, 2015 at 9:23 pm

      No big deal.

      All that matters imo is that he is responding positively and is engaged in the conversation.

    2. katherine taylor

      March 3, 2015 at 1:33 am

      same worry too because my boyfriend is not really the type to reach out. and he often bounces the ball back: if i am cold, he goes cold too.

    3. admin

      March 3, 2015 at 9:48 pm

      Then the solution is simple… when you message him be warm in your message…

      Haha horrible analogy but you get what I am saying, right?

  5. Pororo

    March 1, 2015 at 6:54 pm

    I and my ex broken up for 2 months. I have tried some short period of NC for just 5-7 days. They lasted short time like that because I didn’t want to have a chance to meet him. We were in a ling distance relationship so as soon as he come home, I wanted to meet him to show him my appearance changes. I kept a hope to get him back as soon as I can but I fail. After these meeting, he just said that he still has feeling for me but it isn’t enough to love. He isn’t ready and he wanted to have more time.
    Now, I am trying to do NC for 30 days seriously. I always wonder will it be effective when my ex has other girl on his mind now but she hasn’t accept yet? Is it too late for me to do NC?

    1. admin

      March 2, 2015 at 9:19 pm

      No its not too late.

      In fact, I think it would work out fine for you.

    2. lisa

      March 4, 2015 at 11:15 am

      I don’t understand on what bases you are forming your opinion that here situation will work out fine!? On the fact that he said he doesn’t love here enough? It is ok that you do not have time to give a proper response, but to give very possibly falls hope to someone who is looking for your advice is downright wrong!

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