227 thoughts on “What Does It Mean When My Ex Randomly Texts Me?”

  1. Avatar

    Genevieve

    January 25, 2018 at 3:14 am

    I received a random text from my ex today.
    He and I were together for 2 1/2 years, and he broke up with me 2 1/2 months ago but wanted us to be friendly. He and I haven’t spoken for a month and a half, but a week ago I got my first news of him when I received a notification that he created an Instagram, my favorite app but something he used to always say was ridiculous and vowed to never get. He even followed my best friend whom he only met twice, but not me. I decided not to follow him unless he followed me first. Now today, I got my first FB message from him since our breakup, but I’m confused about it. He sent me an article about my university (he goes to a rivaling school) filing a lawsuit for 8.5 million, and then messaged “haha oh shit.” It’s so random, and the article came from my university’s newspaper which I don’t get why he was reading it. But I’m wondering what kind of message this is. I don’t know if he was trying to get me to talk to him, but I didn’t respond because I wasn’t sure how to. He knows I read it though since it was an FB message.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 25, 2018 at 9:17 pm

      Yeah, it looks like he is trying to initiate a conversation.

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    Mary

    January 23, 2018 at 2:35 am

    Hi.

    My Ex is so confusing. We have been broken up for two years now…and still have feelings for each other. He started dating a girl 5 months after we broke up and they are still together to this day. We have kept in contact with each other and he used to text me goodnight every night until about 2 months ago. He says he doesn’t love her and doesn’t ever like saying it to her but that he needs to play the part. She doesn’t know about me…he has my texts blocked when they are together. He only texts me after she leaves his place which gets to be pretty late at night. I know he cares about me, but to me now they are just words. He doesn’t answer my texts in a timely manner and doesn’t ever acknowledge my emails and I got tired of it. Tired of him not caring about my feelings and always putting her feelings first. He says he has never felt love so deep before like ours and now he’s stuck in this relationship. He says he can’t end it, because to her everything is going great and he doesn’t want to hurt her. He keeps saying he isn’t happy with her and that I’m still all he wants. Is he just playing with my feelings? I started the No Contact this month and am about 16 days into it. I didn’t tell him I wasn’t going to not contact him…just out of the blue I stopped answering his texts…he’s only text me twice since the NC. Back to back days with just a text saying “hi” and the next “hi?” It wasn’t his usual goodnight texts or texts asking about my day. I guess I don’t know what he’s thinking. I am so tempted to call him now that he’s not texting me anymore. If I keep up this NC is he just going to go on a be happy with her?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 24, 2018 at 11:26 am

      Hi Mary,

      They’re together for almost two years now? If yes, then he’s just using you in some way.

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    Jenn

    September 27, 2017 at 1:57 am

    My story is a little different because this is our second time breaking up. we dated for three years the first time for about a year. Within a month he was in a relationship (though he say, for all I know he was with her while we were together) but anyway. He was in a relationship within a month and about 2 months he was engaged. But during this whole time he was texting me but I ignored….I actually did this for about 4-5 months before I had a conversation with him…(he called numerous times for my birthday. But as he was engaged I asked him to leave me along, go be with his girl, but he ignored it =, so I actually moved, changed jobs and everything but he chased me and found me (all while still with her). Again I asked him to continue on there, if it’s meant it will happened because I didnt want to be a part of that. Even though I moved to a new town and got a new job, he found me (just so happen, his job relocated just around the corner from where I live…. what a coincidence, huh?) Within 10 months of this, his mother died and of course , I called to give my condolences and he started to come around and I comfort him during this time and next thing I know he said that he had called off the wedding and was single. He say that he still wanted me but didn’t want to feel like he was in a relationship though. I still told him to just go do whatever he needed to do but I didn’t want to be apart of that. so he made it as if he wanted the relationship but we will take it slow (i agreed because there were kids involved…his)…I told him that I didn’t want to see the kids yet because he went from me, to her (engaged) then back to me…I didn’t want to do it to them or me, unless we were sure we were going to be together. It’s been 10 months, during this time he brought the kids around twice (surprising me). But long story short, just a week after the second time he brought them around, he decides to tell me that he didn’t want to feel like he was in the relationship. But back up first to explain why he said that…just a week before he was home with his kids for the weekend but then Sunday he was going back to work and he called on his way to work, I told him that I didn’t cook….he got upset that I didn’t stop what I was doing to cook for him (but there have been times I didn’t cook and he went to get us dinner or told me to come to job to get money to get dinner. But this time was different, he was really upset that I didn’t cook. Then the next week, he tells me he was on vacation (didn’t tell me ahead of time, so I questioned him about this…this is when he say that he didn’t want to feel like he was in a relationship and that he wasn’t ready…..so while on his vacation, I didn’t hear from him or see him for about two weeks but then when he went back to work, he decided to send these random texts, trying to be funny I believe and also see how I would response ..these text read: “where’s dinner at”, or “I’m hungry, bring me a plate” or “You’re not cooking for me anymore”. Then there was “love u always….miss u too” and the latest one is “hope ur ok and safe”…oh, i forgot about “did you change the locks need to stop by your crib before work” . What’s the point in these text?..he still haven’t called or asked me how I was doing or anything, just simple text. Honestly, I don’t know if there is anyone else because the first time, it caught me off guard that he was in a relationship so quickly, so if there’s one now. But I’m not understanding what he’s doing or trying to do.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      September 28, 2017 at 9:32 pm

      Hi Jenn,

      he’s not going to commit unless you really don’t give him anything if he doesn’t. It looks like he just said to take things slow so he can still get what he wanted.. he just rephrased it. You have to impose your standards. It’s either you walk away from him or he commit and invest in the relationship first before you do.

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    Til

    September 25, 2017 at 4:29 pm

    Hi,

    This is my situation. I was with a guy in a logdistance relationship ( different countries).We used to meet every 2 months. And it was pretty intense and I never had that conection with anyone. We were together for 9-10 months.The last 4 months were a nightmare in terms of comunication.We couldn’ reach each other. I lost my patience and I suggested to stop a few times. Things went worse and finally in July we broke up, in a really bad way,everything on whatsapp. We always said we need to talk about this on the phone.I was waiting for it. He also gave me hopes like sending me pics in between…Then when we had the conversation basically he was the one who talk and he told me he didn’t want to be in those places anymore.And he didn’t want to come back. I was by then totally in love again and I though we could fix it cause we were beyond that.I also thought about moving to his country.
    That made me feel so bad.I felt terrible for 2 weeks but I didn’t text him or anything.
    So after two weeks he texted me with all his rage that he was so angry at me etc
    He thinks it is all my fault, he did everything for things to work.It is true that I did bad some things and I asked him sorry about it, with my full heart.I told him I would like to make him feel better an so i would feel better myself also.
    But never again a conversation on the phone, he avoid it.I don’t know why, I suggested many times.
    Then he told me he stills thinks of me a lot and he sleeps with a thing I bought him.
    Then from time to time I have a message (not loving) just about things that made him feel bad in the past.I told him to talk all the way, not by drops.
    He knows already that I love him and I would like to be with him again and he doesn’t want to be with me but I don’t know why on earth he is taxting me every 4 days, with not useful things.
    Today we had a conversation (written of course) and he told me he doesn’t want to forget me etc.I asked him if he feels love still for me and he replied with a: ‘I feel love for some things and for others I don’t’ which is a non clear answer, the question is so clear.
    I have the feeling he doesn’t want to be with me but for some reason he doesn’t let me to move on.
    I don’t know if I did enough already, but I told him my feelings and he has information in order to wether he wanted to be together he could.
    But why is he doing this? I know you cannot be in his head but what should I do?
    Sometimes I think he is not the same person by the way he adress to me and the things he tell me. Today it was really disgusting that reply.
    And I feel stupid cause I still love him!
    HELP

    Thank u!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      September 27, 2017 at 9:03 pm

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    Mae

    June 30, 2017 at 7:17 pm

    I dated a guy 5 years ago (pretty serious, talked about marriage) who did not like or have much to do with technology. Think Gibbs from NCIS being more technologically inclined. Anyway, I log onto my Facebook and see that I have a message from him, checked the profile before I read the message to make sure it was him but the profile had just been created (he did not use FB when we were together so it makes sense). Open the message and it says that he misses me, wanted to talk, had his number, asked me to text or call him and said that he hoped to hear from me. My question is why now? Why 5 years later? And for someone who did not know how to even use a computer that would have taken a long time to not only get on FB, but to find me and post a message? I am also married now with pictures of my husband, new daughter and I all over my page. What was he thinking?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      July 4, 2017 at 5:17 pm

      Can’t say why exactly, but it would be better to just ask why and if you can help him something..let your husband know..just dont put malice in his intentions for now.. But of course, for me, if it’s really an emergency, he would have said it.. If it were me, I’ll just ask if he messaged me for something I can help with. If he replies just being friendly, I’d stopped talking. Because I don’t make friends with exes, especially if I’m married.. I’m only friendly if the circumstance calls for it, like being co workers or co parents

  6. Avatar

    Confused Andy

    May 23, 2017 at 9:36 pm

    I broke up with my boyfriend because he had become cold and distant, I felt he was keeping his options his options open and did not want a committed relationship. I did de NC for like 28 days before I saw him on a dating application, during this time he didn’t contact me at all. So I texted him and I asked him what he wanted that I was ok with either decision he made. I told him I wanted a committed relationship that if he wanted that I was there but if he didn’t want that it was better for us continue our separate ways.
    We talked for 2 hours and at the end he told me he missed me that he wanted to change certain things in the relationship but not all of them (the ones that generated the breakup). After that conversation he has been sending me random messages every other day saying hi there is a kiss for you (emoji), I just answer without showing any emotions like thanks or kisses to you too. He is being doing that for the last three weeks, last time he disappeared for a whole week and just appeared saying hi I’m sending you kisses, the ones that we like (in present). I said thanks. Then he said you don’t have to thank me, is not a favour. I answered kisses to you too but I prefer the real ones.
    I don’t know if he is keeping me in the back burner and he is seeing other people Is he playing mind games? I don’t know how to answer his texts, or how long this is going to take, I don’t know what he wants. I’m not contacting him I just answer his texts. What should I do? What should I answer? I’m very frustrated.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 25, 2017 at 4:51 pm

      You didnt do the nc process the right way.. ALthough, I understand you asked that after the nc because you were the one that broke up with him.. but then I think you should have restarted nc, after you got rejected. He might not have said it straight, but not changing the reasons you broke up with him is like saying, either you lower your standards or walk away..And because you didn’t walk away, you’re conveying that you’re still waiting for him to change when he clearly said he wouldn’t do that.

  7. Avatar

    Mel

    May 9, 2017 at 9:36 pm

    Hi there. I really want my ex back and have just finished day 3 of no contact. Basically his reason for messaging me was as we are in the process of cancelling a holiday and he needs to pay the fee to cancel it. The thing is, my dad has now taken over this matter and text my ex to say he is now dealing with this and to communicate with him. So basically, my dad text him yesterday to say the money needs to be in and off the back of that my ex said he will get in touch with the company to try and sort something out. Well today, instead of messaging my dad, he messaged me twice. One was to say he was trying to get through and had been all on his lunch and was fuming and the second one to ask me to tell my dad that he will have to try again tomorrow. What I don’t get is why he didn’t just message my dad to let him know that. Why did he have to message me? Can this be any sort of indication that he is missing me and wants me to communicate with him? Sorry for so much info but just wanted you to have the full story. Is it worth continuing with nc or do you think this relationship is well and truly over. We have been split for just over 2 weeks now. Look forward to a response 🙂

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      May 11, 2017 at 7:43 pm

      it’s hard to say just from that.. he could be or he’s just more comfortable communicating it through you

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    Maria

    April 21, 2017 at 11:22 am

    Hello Amor,

    it passed one of the third part of nc. I got weird text from ex. I d like to understand it’s type and his motivation for it.

    A little bit about our relationship about one year we were in ‘move away ldr’ (was together at one place for a few months) it s me who moving. I moved a lot different place due to my work, a few time I was visited him. Relationship was nice (especially all the time when we were one place) except part of distance. He helped me to move in to the new place and after we broken up.(at the same day) For broke up it was unanimous decision (cause I clearly understand that he isn’t going to commit me now as reason he don’t what he will do in future or make any plan) So break up was without any negative emotion or fight. Just neutral.

    Now I got text like that
    ‘how is your new home? i think i forgot to do smth for you didn’t i?i hope you well.’

    What does he want to say by this weird question? or he just is trying to gauge my reaction or checking on me? is it positive or just neutral?

    Thank you to make it clear a bit.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 26, 2017 at 4:47 pm

      It’s positive.. Probably just trying to see if you would react to him

  9. Avatar

    tired & confused

    April 13, 2017 at 10:11 pm

    so I went a month and a half with no contact with my ex. It was his birthday today and breached out. We shot some messages back and forth and had a good laugh he even sent old pictures of us to me…

    And when I said I was surprised he still had them, he said “of course I do”. He ended pulling away at the end saying that talking to me was “difficult” but that he’s so proud of how well I’m doing and that it was nice speaking to me…it was just too hard.

    Any advice on where to go from here? I’m exhausted by all this back & forth and never know when to throw the towel in or to hang on.

    Thanks!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 16, 2017 at 7:10 am

      that means he can sense you really didn’t move on and you’re still hurting.. during your nc, how much did you improve and posted?

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    fifi

    April 13, 2017 at 11:25 am

    So I am out of NC and in the process of building rapport with my X (though i know the process of getting introvert X can take a long time). after our last meetup i decided to go silent until last Tuesday he called me in the middle of the night when I was asleep.

    The next day I contacted him, and he told me he wanted to ask about some royal family name (midnight?!), and he apologized if the call would wake me up. i told him im fine since my phone on silent mode.

    Then he said we catchup sometime soon? (so i guess he would want to see me again). I responded sure.

    He told me you have a good day and i replied the same.

    Today I felt like i cant wait too long about this game he is playing with me, so i texted him “Suddenly I feel like I’m missing you”.

    Up til now I didnt hear any reply from him.

    What is your take on this?

    If he doesnt reply means I should just move on?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 13, 2017 at 6:09 pm

      let’s wait for 2-3 days.. how long have you been trying to build rapport?

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    Spencer

    April 6, 2017 at 2:27 pm

    My bf andI broke up just under a week ago due to a difference in relationship goals. Everything else was pretty good. It was a very mature, amicable break. I’ve employed NC during this time but he’s texted (at 8:45 am) me inquiring about a recent work effort that he was keenly aware of and supportive of. Is there anything I can send or NC only?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      April 9, 2017 at 2:24 pm

      nope.. ignore it

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    Lellie

    March 3, 2017 at 2:54 am

    I am a previous follower/current owner of the EBR PRO and can’t find any topics relating to my situation below? Please share your opinion if you can.

    After having moved to my LDR EX city and having some friendly surface-level texts that turned into me clinging to him, my EX told me, “we need to move on” on 12/30/15. So I’ve since then deleted his phone number and tried to move on, dated, etc.

    Fast-Forward to last Saturday, 2/25/17 @ 12:38AM when I got a picture-text from an unfamiliar number. I woke and replied, 9:12AM “Who is this?” and after not getting a reply (and recognizing the unfamiliar picture of a girl in cut-off denim shorts/tank top) I called the number and got my EX’s voicemail. So later that afternoon I sent him a video a little girl dancing alongside paraders to “back that ass up”. (We used to exchange funny pictures/videos so that seemed like an appropriate reply, mirroring his contact)

    He still hasn’t responded. Was his 12:38AM text random or significant at all? Should I have not responded? We hadn’t spoken since June 2016 when I emailed him about a lost dog I’d found and then had 3 exchanges about that dog. What should I do, if anything?

    1. Avatar

      Lellie

      March 8, 2017 at 12:55 am

      Thanks Amor. It just hurts thinking that his text was accidental, I wish he’d deleted my phone number to avoid those types of accidents. Now I feel like I’m starting over trying to rid my mind of thoughts of him.

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 10, 2017 at 12:47 pm

      You’re welcome.. it sucks but sometimes getting hurt again is what helps us move on faster..

    3. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 3, 2017 at 8:21 pm

      Hi Lellie,

      You just have to wait, if he intended to talk, he will reply. For me, the most is a week, if he doesn’t, let it go.

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    Cat

    January 10, 2017 at 3:04 am

    I was dating a guy long distance for about 6 months. He suddenly dumped me a little over a week ago saying he hasn’t liked me for the past month and a half. I was devastated. I’ve been doing NC for the last week. Every Monday he used to send me a song of the week. He didn’t last week and I didn’t expect him to since he dumped me and I’ve been heartbroken and upset with him. And then today after not hearing anything for a week he just sent me the name of the song and the artist and nothing else. He didn’t even ask how I was doing. I’ve been doing things to improve myself and I do really miss him and still like him. What should I do and what does it mean that he texted me that?

    1. Avatar

      Cat

      January 12, 2017 at 10:56 pm

      Ok thanks! Also I got a Snapchat message from him last night. I’m curious what he said but I also don’t want to open it because then he will see that I saw it. Any suggestions on what I should do. It’s been 2 weeks since we broke up and he said he was going to delete Snapchat for a while since he used it against me. But he’s already downloaded it again. He views my stories but I am working hard to not view his.

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 13, 2017 at 12:09 pm

      Nothing.. You just ignore it and continue being active in posting. I know it’s easier said than done but that’s the better approach than waste your efforts in the past days.

    3. Avatar

      Cat

      January 12, 2017 at 2:57 am

      Ok thanks! I’m trying really hard to stick with no contact. When he broke up with me 2 weeks ago he said he was deleting his Snapchat since he used it against me. But I saw this weekend that he redownloaded it and has been posting stories. I am working to not look at them because then he would see that I viewed it. I can see that he has viewed my stories. I also got a Snapchat message from him tonight. But I don’t know what it says because if I open it he will see that I saw it. What should I do? It is only 8 days into no contact for me.

    4. Avatar

      Cat

      January 10, 2017 at 10:03 pm

      So do you think it was just a test? It hurts that he just sent the song and didn’t say anything else to me to apologize or ask how I was doing. I have been working really hard at improving myself and am going to go on a vacation soon. It’s long distance and I really want him to miss me and want me back. I am trying really hard to stick with the no contact but I don’t want him to forget about me. I also wrote a letter to him a week after he broke up with me, talking about how heartbroken I felt and all the good times we had together before I found out he’d been lying to me and leading me on. Do you think this is ok to send to him after the 30 days?

    5. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 11, 2017 at 11:17 am

      nope dont..that would be like chasing..

    6. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 10, 2017 at 9:38 pm

      Hi Cat,

      just ignore it.. he pobably did that because he’s wondering why you’re not texting. Since it was what he usually sent, its safe to do it again

  14. Avatar

    EBR Team Member: Amor

    January 8, 2017 at 3:57 pm

    Hi,

    do you want to try the no contact rule and start improving yourself? You would have to make your posts public, better if you can unblock him. You dont have to add him, just make it easier to see your posts

  15. Avatar

    EBR Team Member: Amor

    January 8, 2017 at 3:57 pm

    Hi,

    do you want to try the no contact rule and start improving yourself? You would have to make your posts public, better if you can unblock him. You dont have to add him, just make it easier to see your posts

  16. Avatar

    See Dee

    December 27, 2016 at 8:44 pm

    Then man in my life was just a friend, a friend of two years. He was confused, thought our friendship was enough. I had to walk away, as he would not commit. After 8 weeks of NC I get a call from him with no message. 30 min later I text and ask was that a booty call or intentional. He responds by saying butt dial. Sorry. And wished me a merry Christmas. I respond with same, and take care… just to call 30 min later and he doesn’t pick up… but sends a text back to me asking if call was intentional or butt dial. I respond with intentional, he immediately calls back. We have a great 20-30 min conversation that ends with him saying I’ll talk to you later… I say take care. What does this mean? Now my head is messed up again after 8 weeks of no contact! He’s 51 never married, no children. Was I led astray? Hoodwinked?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 29, 2016 at 4:16 pm

      Hi See dee,

      why did you ask if that was a booty call, we’re you friends with benefits before? I think he’s starting to be friendly again

  17. Avatar

    Confused

    December 26, 2016 at 12:38 pm

    I broke up with my boyfriend a year and a half ago after dating for 6 months. I found out he was dating other people. I stopped texting in July ’15 and in Aug. sent one text after he texted and called saying stop texting me or calling me. I didn’t hear anything til Christmas Eve and he sent a text wishing me and my family a Merry Christmas and said he was sorry he lies about dating others (our relationship was serious, he asked me to marry him). I didn’t respond. This year two days before Thanksgiving he sent a text from a different cell number asking how I was. I consider that a check-in text. Then on Christmas ’16 he sends me another text from his new number that said hello my long lost friend. He said he loved me and hoped I was having a nice Holiday with family. I haven’t broken the NC in a year and a half. I don’t plan to respond. Just curious of what you think his motives are.

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 29, 2016 at 3:46 am

      Hi Confused,

      We cant assume what his motives are but if you dont plan to reconnect, it doesn’t matter anymore..

  18. Avatar

    Lam

    December 9, 2016 at 8:19 am

    After 3 days of NC, my bf sent me a text hoping that I am fine, understand his decision and not to be too angry with him. He said it wasn’t easy for him either and also told me a big news in his job (he is a very career focused person and used to talk about his job with me a lot). We broke up because his feeling faded a lot since we moved in. He has been struggling with our relationship, not comfortable with it anymore. We actually said that we would be friends after the break up and take it from there. But I secretly hope that he would miss me and be back with me. I feel like he is missing me with this message, but still believes that he made a right decision. Should I just continue NC in this case?

    Also, a common fd of ours that we are both close to will be in town next week and we may meet in the small group night out. Should I even go?

    Thanks! xx

    1. Avatar

      Lam

      December 9, 2016 at 8:22 am

      When we broke up, he said he still likes me and care for me, but he needed to have this make up so.

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 12, 2016 at 7:43 pm

      Hi Lam,

      It’s natural that he will miss you, because he’s used to you being around. How long did you talk to him after the break up? If you really wanted to increase the chances of him missing you, improve yourself, make it seem like you’re starting to have your own routine now. You can attend the event, but if you can avoid it and just meet separately with your friend, better. If you are going there, just be polite and casual. If he asks why you’re ignoring him, tell him you need space to move on.

  19. Avatar

    Sara

    December 6, 2016 at 9:32 am

    Hello,
    I had a relationship for 3 years with my ex, and we broke up for 1 year & 4 months. He texted me 5 days ago, saying only 3 words “can we talk?”. I didn’t reply, but I want to understand why he texted me after all this time. I don’t want him back either, I don’t want to get hurt again. We used to break up a lot, but the last time was the longest. also, I can’t be friend with him, it’s not easy for me to be friend with someone I love.
    I’m confused and I can’t stop thinking about him since I saw the message.

    What should I do? should I text him back? and what should I say?

    Please help!!
    Thank you!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 10, 2016 at 11:30 am

      Hi Sara,

      if you don’t want to be friends then don’t talk to him..

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    Suzy

    November 19, 2016 at 11:46 pm

    Hi,my ex BF left me 3 months ago; I was devastated by the breakup especially that we were talking about the getting engaged. He called me one night to tell me that he couldn’t picture himself being married for now and that he has a lot of affection for me but it wasn’t love,I freaked out and began crying and telling him that I couldn’t go on in my life without him and that I was in love with him,he told me he was sorry and that was all.
    After that I didn’t call him and went into a NC (thanks to your website) he tried to reach me 3 times but I didn’t respond during all this period, then I started posting beautiful pictures of me on facebook and he started to react.
    First he just commented on a picture of me smiling : I’m glad you seem that happy, I didn’t even liked or responded.then after two weeks he sent me a message telling me that he was thinking about me and that he hopes I’m doing fine , I took some hours and responded with a simple thank you I hope U okay too. he responded with some compliment about my whatsapp profil picture…then nothing during 3 other weeks.
    recently I posted another beautiful picture, he didn’t react for a while then one night I was online and it was late he told me : what are you doing still up aren’t you working tomorrow? I told him that I was going to sleep in a few minutes and he told me good night. the day after same situation he told me : why are you still up , he even called me like he used to call me while we were together (I had a special name) and when we were saying goodnight he used another name he used to call me to make fun about how nerdy and smart I am… and then nothing since almost a week.
    I think that I followed your advices and I’m doing good so far , but what’s the next step,how to understand what he wants and how to push him to react openly.
    PS: he lives overseas so the only way of communication is through social media and phone.

    1. Avatar

      Suzy

      December 4, 2016 at 10:12 pm

      I started the No Contact right after the breakup, I disappeared for at more than a month ,before starting to show my pictures on FB etc, and that’s the moment he started reacting,I never initiated a conversation, it was always him the one to start and I kept my answers short and cold,now I don’t know what to do, I’m afraid to push him away with my distant attitude.
      Yes I continued improving myself but honestly I’ve been so busy with work to perform a big change, but well I lost some weight, cut my hair etc, read tons of books.
      The big news is that he contacted me few days ago sending me a picture of his plane ticket coming home in 3 weeks for Christmas with a message : Just not to be surprised if you cross me in the street, I’m coming home soon.
      Why did he send me such a message? do you think it’s a good thing ? do you think he will ask me to see him ?what to do in this case ?

    2. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 5, 2016 at 12:26 pm

      it is a good sign, but don’t overthink. and start building rapport, that’s ok now..

    3. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 22, 2016 at 5:25 pm

      Hi Suzy,

      wait, uhm.. It’s supposed to be a full 30 days of no contact.. And then after 30 days, you can initiate texting to build rapport..so, in your case you responded in week three right? How many weeks has it been since you first started nc? Are you still actively improving yourself? By this time, you can start slowly building rapport.. Check this one:
      EBR 053: Deconstructing The Perfect First Contact Text Message

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