How To Get A Long Distance Relationship Ex Boyfriend Back

5,234 thoughts on “The Complete Guide To Getting An Ex Boyfriend Back In A Long Distance Relationship”

Faith

October 7, 2013 at 5:43 am

Hi, my ex and I was in a LDR too. He broke up with me over a month ago because he said we are just not compatible to each other, I was too clingy, needy and depend on him, and because he just don’t feel the same anymore. He mentioned that he lost his feeling and he just don’t love me anymore. I begged him to give me another chance, and he agreed to put our relationship on trial period. But I screwed the trial period up, I became more clingy and desperate and always begged him to come back. This resulted in he decided to really break up with me. I was supposed to come visit him on his birthday but he ended does not allow me to visit him. I was broken. He told me to move on with my life. The day after I texted him but he’s so cold and unresponsive. He even asked me to take time off. I stopped contacting him for 9 days but on his birthday I called him and texted him for the next few days. He is still unresponsive and cold. It seems like he do not want to talk to me. Now I’m in my 2nd day of NC. Any suggestion of what should I do to bring him back? Thanks.

admin

October 8, 2013 at 1:42 am

You haven’t tried NC for 30 days though have you?

Jessica

October 7, 2013 at 4:37 am

Hi Chris I’ve already visited your site few times and found it useful and funny, things you wrote always makes me laugh a lot.:)

I was in a long distance relationship and he broke up with me 3months ago, he said we are way too different. Unlike most case me and my ex still keep a good kind of friendship, we text each other once a week and even talked twice on Skype. I wanted to try the NC when I found out your website but it was already too late. Me and him still has a nice friendship and it will be wired if I just cut the contact, I thought.

Few days ago one of my girl friend went on a trip with him and some friends, my ex showed a picture about a girl that he like recently and talked about it, and at the end they turned out talking about me. My friend asked him if it’s still possible for me and my ex to be back together, my ex and first said no, he said we are way too different and have two different value of life, he said he likes me a lot as a person and really want to keep the friendship with me…but in the end he told my friend that he really dosent know whether he wants to get back with me, he said he’ll see.

I’m going to Italy(his country) next week, stay there for a year for my master degree, I still want him back. Do you think in my case I still have a shot to get him back? I feel like he lost the interest in me because he knows me too well. What should I do? If you can give my any advice would be great:)

Thanks anyway

Jess

lisha

October 17, 2013 at 2:57 am

Hi Chris,
He split up with me almost 2 weeks now and since then I didn’t send him email. Yesterday he emailed me checking up if I and family are ok from earthquake that hits in the central part of Visayas ( he knew I came from Cebu). Should I respond to him?

Thank you.
admin

October 17, 2013 at 6:00 pm

Just tell him you are ok (it would be mean to leave him on the hook.(

But don’t respond after that.
admin

October 8, 2013 at 1:36 am

Glad I could provide some laughs haha!

Well, you seem to want him back so I say go for it. At this point you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
jessica

October 8, 2013 at 3:45 am

it’s always really funny becuz everytime when i visited your site feeling sad, but in the end turned out laughing real loud!

well yeah one problem is he knows i’m going there and he still contacts me but even when i mentioned i’m about to leave he ignorned it, it seems like he completly dosen’t care. i feel a bit hurt about it cuz i though even friends wuold be nice and warm to aske me something about my departure.
admin

October 9, 2013 at 1:43 am

Glad I can provide the laughs. Probably the funny pictures I pick out.

Do you think your ex may be a little bit immature?
jessica

October 9, 2013 at 2:08 am

oh yeah of course he is sometimes-.- so what to do with it will be better if i want him back?

sib

October 5, 2013 at 3:45 am

hi
my case is gunna b very different.
i had two years relation with my ldr bf. at that tym we both were 20 now 23.
3 hour drive distance met twice only and both tym we met like crazy in love. thn we had breakup its been year and haf to breakup many no contact periods nd thn again takng with each other fr two days in which we askd r u ok? ur fmly? hws life gng? m dng ths wat u dng nw a days.? aftr knwing all ths again he creats sum issue nd we again have a month no contact period and same thng happn again. at the start of breakup we block each other from fb and both thn made anther accnt and look at each other wall. or sum time unblock each other again and aftr lookng at wall again block each other.
even last time we chat on viber and watsapp and aftr our chat he block mi from viber nd wats app nd last nyt i checkd m unblock again.
in ths one and haf year of breakup there was not even a single day whn i didnt thnk of him or he was not on my mind.
i try movng on he also says he got a gf now and she loves hm alot.. he never once sad tht he loves her alot. he says tht he dnt thnk of me now that he move on. yet one day he calld me sayng that i went to market and there saw a grl like u and since thn i cant stop thnkng of u nd missing alot.

now i m very ill have not much time he dnt know abt it but watever tym i have left i wanna spnd with him. cuz he never left ma mind
please help me sumthng.

admin

October 5, 2013 at 4:54 am

Have you tried the NC yet?

Belle

October 5, 2013 at 12:53 am

We were dating for 6 months but my constant insecurities over his friendships with other girls got him tired and he asked for us to be friends.we’re in a long distance relationship. He said “Let’s be friends for now and continue this when i return( next year in april)..what does he mean by that?

admin

October 5, 2013 at 4:44 am

He wants to be free of the relationship for a while thats what I think. He doesn’t want to be tied down so he can play the field until he returns.
Belle

October 5, 2013 at 9:21 am

The full story is…I got really upset about a picture he liked on instagram…i always stalk him on instagram cause I’m not on instagram…ive always complained about him flirting with other girls..i got so upset I sent him a message and even retweeted some tweets about not flirting on twitter and took down the pic I had of him on whatsapp..i know I have nothing to worry abt cause he put my pics on instagram calling me his girlfriend and even on twitter everybody knows we were dating even the girls he flirts with..he always encouraged me to get over my insecurities and trust him but I was so scared he’d cheat on me..we fought a couple of times over his friendships with other girls..i feel so bad cause I know I pushed him away…thats when he asked us to be friends for now and continue when he gets back
admin

October 6, 2013 at 12:14 am

Ok, then that is an issue. The more insecure you get (and the more he sees it) he will just put you in the “crazy” category and you need to be in the “ungettable” category.
Belle

October 6, 2013 at 6:48 pm

Hi Chris!He called me yesterday right after I sent those commments…I didn’t pick up.I was up worrying all night that what if I push him further away by not picking up during the NC..he’s sent a good morning message too, which I hvent repied…and just today he has called me 3 times already!
Whenever we fought we’d spend days not talking and then we’d get over it nd talk things out and we’d go back to our usual lovey-dovey selves but since this time our fight ended up in him asking us to be friends , I’m so scared he’ll get the wrong idea that I don’t wnt him anymore and then he’d go awayy 🙁 :(..what do you think?
admin

October 7, 2013 at 12:32 am

Ok, YOU can always gauge your situation better than I can b/c you know him better than I do. So, if your gut is telling you to talk to him for a little bit you can go ahead. Though remember that there is some risk involved with that.
Belle

October 5, 2013 at 9:34 am

He also said he knew we’d keep fighting and he didn’t want that…he said “I don’t look at this relationship as a short time thing or a free pass..hes looking at the long run and that he wanted a better future” I begged and pleaded that I didn’t want to lose him or just be friends..that I didn’t mean to hurt him he said I can achieve all that by being good friends and getting to know ourselves better and work on that..i freaked out and called him 20 times he told me he didn’t want to talk abt it until he was ready..he didn’t pick any of my calls..but the very next day he sent me a message asking if I was okay..and asked what I was up to..i told him I was at the salon getting my hair done and he said ” well since you’re turning a new leaf why don’t u cut all your hair off? I’m just saying” i laughed..then he suggested a new hair style I should do.. we talked and laughed for a bit and that was it..thats when I came across your website and decided to do the no contact rule..i feel so terrible..we used to talk everyday and now it feels like torture cause I can’t talk to my best friend..i still love him soo much and I didn’t realise how much until this happened..im so scared I’ve lost him..do I have a chance of getting him back?what do I do to get him back?
admin

October 6, 2013 at 12:16 am

I think so!

Sometimes you have to do whats best for your chances and sometimes too much “talk” time with your ex can hurt so I think NC is something you should stick with.
Jae

October 5, 2013 at 8:01 am

Is it a good idea to try to pursue the guy if he thinks that way? I am in the same situation, and now I’m wondering if I should try to get him back if he only wants to play games for now…
If a guy wants to play the field for now then will he even want to be pursued by an ex?
admin

October 6, 2013 at 12:11 am

It will feed his ego if you pursue him and in that case I am not sure it is a good thing….

caroline

October 4, 2013 at 10:45 pm

What if he doesn’t contact you at all during the 30 day NC period? Does that mean you should lengthen the amount of time before you contact him?

And is that really what’s going through a guys head??

Few days into a LDR breakup here. Neither of us really wanted to break up, the feelings were still strong on both sides but he thought circumstances weren’t right and it would be easier on both if us if we broke up…

admin

October 5, 2013 at 4:37 am

Usually it means that he is really stubborn or not ready to talk yet. Either way I always suggest after 30 days you reach out to guage things!
Caroline

October 18, 2013 at 7:22 pm

Update:

I fell off the NC wagon.

He texted me a week after breaking up with me, apologising for hurting me and saying he thought he could talk soon. My reply (and no, I’m sorry Chris, I couldn’t resist) was friendly and affectionate but deliberately without any pressure. Then a week after that, I saw him online and said hello. He replied immediately but seemed quite distant although friendly with me. I haven’t been in contact with him at all since.

I think I know what you going to say, but help please…
admin

October 19, 2013 at 7:37 pm

Hahaha its actually gone well. How far did you get into NC? Maybe you can just “erase” those NC slip ups.
caroline

October 23, 2013 at 12:21 pm

So we forgot those minor slip ups, and after that he sent a further message apologising for being distant saying he would be more friendly next time. I just gave a friendly non committal reply. Then I saw him online, but didn’t contact him, he logged off shortly afterwards and I later sent a message saying a brief friendly hello. I’m working on the theory here that an adapted version of NC could have positive results….

So to summarise, he initiated contact a week after the break up, my reply was friendly but quite cool. Then I initiated contact 19 days into NC, his reply was immediate and friendly but a little distant. He then sent an apology for being distant and making reference to future contact, my reply was friendly but again a little cool. Lastly I initiated contact with a brief and friendly hello.

My question is, in your opinion as the resident male, would you please be able to you give me any idea of what he could be thinking? It would really help to have some indication or at least an idea!
admin

October 23, 2013 at 10:22 pm

As a resident male hahahahahah.

To me it just sounds like no one is advancing things. Have you done anything to reignite his feelings?

Melanie

October 4, 2013 at 8:11 pm

My story is kind of long, sorry in advance & my guy is kind of different possibly…

Our relationship is LDR first of all but if you please read this over before directing me to the site
because I already read it. Basically we knew each other online and we started talking on the phone
Soonthereafter he asked me out. Had some issues like him keeping his word on when he would call
etc. Then I found out he was cheating. I suspected because of things I saw on his FB and asked if I
could see his FB whether or not I would find anything, he let me log into it (gave me his password
and all) and I saw he archived all the things he had said to about 53 girls. Mixed from flirting to
sexual stuff and telling them they’re pretty etc. Through out time I found out he had eaten out a
girl, kissed one or two etc. basically because what he found out later was his insecurity and
need for approval/ not getting physical attention because it was far away. no sex though. Part of
it was his douche bag guy friend trying to get him some – and my guy is already a little insecure so he
took the bait sometimes even though he felt wrong later.
After this our relationship was on and off quite a bit.
I left for one month a little after I discovered this. Then came back and left again a month later for a
little bit because he wasn’t shaping up. He had gotten better but still was flirting with girls on dating
sites apps on fb etc. I got back with him and we lasted a few months until I left again. This time I
left for 3 months and deleted him off facebook thinking I couldnt do this anymore.
. Including the other times I walked away including this one, he would text me every
night/day for three months if not call here and there specifically the “Its 4:03 and I cant sleep without you next to me”
by Shinedown lyrics. I tried dating another guy but found myself back after 3 months of trying to stay away. He
was insecure so I found out 2 days after I left he joined a dating site which he told me had no mean-
ing and was because he was hurting. He also met this girl towards the end of this period and went on a date right after
I came back but it
didn’t work out and after pushing me away out of hurt and worry I would leave again he finally came
back – it was VERY hard to get him back this time as he said it would never happen again etc. He said he only
went for this girl because he was scared of coming back to me and it was a way to push me away but he
didn’t actually like her or anything. He said sorry.
Over time he would tell me things he did or ways he cheated ( staggered confessing over the year).
So for me healing was difficult as the wound would keep getting refreshed. I became an angry
person and maybe said things to him like name calling or that he isn’t a good boyfriend etc which
made him feel more guilty over the year and he brought up that he tried hurting/killing himself bec-
ause of this guilt that he felt and me guilting him more. Besides this he would lie/not keep his word
so it was hard for me to forgive things and trust him. I stayed from Sept 2012-end of March 2013
then left again because I felt he was still lieing and doing repetitive behavior, also I told him the
only way to fix this is to see someone becuase he had a serious issue. He said he would but
he never did because he felt like he didn’t need it even though he agreed he did which I think is
part of him wanting to keep me in any way. Because of this continued empty promise, I left again..
Of course , couldn’t do without and I came back a month later of him sending me texts/few calls. He had been talking to a girl, but
eventually he left her behind for me and deleted her off of fb per my request and let me have his
password back eventually because of my trust issue and me saying it would help get back our
trust little by little. This was the HARDEST to get him back. He kept saying/fighting me that
something between us had changed it would never be the same again and that he loved me still
very much but it wasn’t going to work out. Eventually after holding on he saw that things were
still the same and we had lost nothing. He said things like us seeing each other often and me
sending him pics would have to happen more often. ( I have a little insecurity sending pics at
times and used to make excuses not to or rarely did) So we went back and eventually he was
saying permanent stuff again as he did before about us picking things our for our house etc./marriage
Basically the other things that bothered him were the fb password thing a little, not trusting him,
making him feel guilty even though he kept lieing/not keeping his word, and he would paraphrase
making him feel like a monster. He said he felt he wasn’t good enough amongst other things,
the distance was also really hard on him. During this time he sent me a few personal items of his to hold onto- his HS class ring, bracelet his mom gave him when he was younger, a cd, a little necklace insturment and guitar pick. I offered to see him a month after I came back into his life.
We planned it and met up. He was comepletely had over heels for me as I was him and he said I
was like an angel to him etc. He even did a mock “will you marry me” on one knee before I left. He was a little better than before but when I got back I found out
he was lying that he was hanging out with the girl he had been talking to for the most recent
month I had left-but ONLY in group settings and as a friend. Just the fact that he hid it- probably
so I dont worry/freak out as he explained. He said sorry and deleted her out of his phone. She used to hug the
group including him and I didn’t like that so after a few times of promising he would stop , he did.
Back and forth arguing and stuff about him keeping his word. I told him instead of the psychologist
since its pricey and he didn’t want to go that far, he could do research on these things. He mostly
did it on his own and every now and then we would talk about what he learned and he would tell
me more things he had done 2 years ago that he hadn’t admitted. He had a hard time doing research
consistenly even though he promised this. We saw eachtother again- Before I went I was nervous bc of the girl
who hangs out with his group that he talked to during the month break-that he said was just to fill the void and never liked.
He said he loves me and wants to be with me forever and he’d be damned if he stopped chasing me and that he’ll yell
how much he loves me at the party tomm night when I see him infront of the chic. I visited him in his homestate.
We had a great time, met his friends, his dad etc. He even offered to go up to that girl with me and tell her infront of me
that what they had meant nothing and he never liked her and it was to fill the void-to make me happy and feel better but
she went to her car the time we were about to do it. It was a fun trip. When I went back the arguing started. Everytime he
made a mistake like skipping research (which he promised doing everyday) or not calling when he said
he would etc he would be upset that I was upset and say you’re not looking at the big picture and just
enjoying the time now that Im here. He didn’t want to face consequence of me being upset when he did those things.
He brought up after talking to a few friends that I had to put the past behind us or it would ruin us. And I said I wanted to
and he gave it one more shot to see if I could do this (which I didnt really think he meant would be the last given our history) and while we
were having this convo he told me one more thing he did during one of our breaks the prior year that meant nothng ( just getting a lap
dance at a strip club -friends birthday and that he was just hurting alot). This made me upset and while i tried to look over it I said that
Im going to once again pick up the pieces of my shattered heart and collect myself and he said okay then started talking about his
you know what and that he was horny. I felt like he wasn’t empathetic even though Im sure he didnt mean it that way. We argued about this
and he brought up that I broke my promise and Im doing the same thing by going on and on about it etc. -Im a talker. We talked and I
told him its fine w.e We let it go then I put slight distance between us. I had also injured myself and he seemed a little indiff. about it in that
he wasn’t checking on me (which maybe he didnt mean in a bad way and I took personally). He was helpful but I told him he needs to be more
supportive etc. So one night he told me we would absolutely talk and he would not fall asleep during the convo bc he was going to drink an energy drink and we hadn’t talked as much.
He promised several times. He said he s going to his friends house for a couple hours. He kept in touch with me through text during this time
and what ended up being a couple hours went from 9pm-1am. He called at 1 and said sorry he drank and he had to sober up. He
told me we could still talk a little. So I started telling him my story and what I went through at the ER when I got injured and he
fells asleep during this-he usually crashes hard. He woke up in between and said that he s still listening but I knew he wasn’t.
He called me back at 5am saying sorry and that he was leaving. Didn’t answer. He called back several times during the day and
said sorry but I was furious because he didn’t prioritize me like usual or make sure he did what it took to keep his word. More distance between
us partially because it was hard to talk at my parents and whathe did. Then one night he went to his concert and he texted me
from a friends phone to let me know his phne died and to see if we were going to talk. I was upset with him from before so I said no
and when he got home late and called ( I asked his friend to just call me when he gets home after this bc I missed him) I got upset-maybe I shouldn’t
have at all bc we hadn’t agreed to talk. So it was more icing on the cake for him- in a bad way. After this I put more distance and we hadn’t talked
on the phone for a week and I told him I was thinking about leaving him but I would let him know when I got back to my house because
I was thinking with a stressedout mind from being at home so much. He kept messaging me he missed me so much but said it was
fun to talk on fb and mix it up etc. During that time period we argued randomly. I decided that I needed to be more positive and less
harsh on him because I wanted to save us. This 360 made him a little annoyed and he said that he didnt know if he could
do this anymore. We were on the phone I think and he mentioned he
needs a break to just be single, not tied down, refresh himself and work on his band which was having issues. I rejected this
out of the classic fear it was over even though he promised me it wasnt the end and he was coming back and he still
really loved me and planned to be with me. I asked and he said it was nothing to do with girls and he woulnd’t go for anyone.
I still was unsure. I got upset and one night called him telling him I’ll just leave him if thats what he wants and he repeated
the same thing about why he wants it and out of fear of losing me maybe he said idk if i need the break anymore. And he
told me not to go but he said idk still about whether or not he wanted it. I pressured him to make a choice because it was
hurting me. He seemed a little more distant but was still sweet to me. Eventually – after saying a million IDK’s he left me.
The process was me asking him if he knew and him being unsure. He texted one time that he couldnt do it anymore and I called
him fighting it. He got upset because it was an hour before his show and he seemed already negative when he got on the phone
besides being rushed with the band -which is bad timing on his part and via text. He also got upset because I interrupted him
and he mentioned that its another reaosn why he would leave. But I told him not to and to think about it and we wuold
talk later and he said okay. When I asked for one more chance to prove I could
put the past behind us he said he doesnt know if he can risk it or trust me and that he couldn’t take it anymore and
he was making him go crazy. Just repeated this. Basically we skyped on my birthday and he seemed nice that day- woke up at
5am saying sorry he passed out (he usually said happy bday at 12am exactly) and he said happyy birthday which
surprised me since were on shaky grounds that he still cared that much. He said it a few more times during the day
and on fb. I asked and he
said he wouldnt break up with me on my birthday. He said he liked it-the skyping bc we hadnt done it before. We were talking
and having fun then I brought up his decision and he kept saying IDK. He said he couldnt bring himself to do it but
he couldnt give me another chance either. He said If i left him it would be easier and I said so you want me to leave and he
was like IDK. I asked him if he wanted to be friends instead and he said that would probably be for the best. He said
he still wanted me in his future. When I asked him when it would be he might leave he said IDK tonight or tomorrow- now I feel like you’re rushing me.
I asked him why he hadn’t left yet if he wasn’t going to give me a chance and he said out of fear I would hurt or kill myself. I told him I wouldnt and I said so do
you want it to be the end? And after a few IDK’s and me asking he said I guess, if I don’t do it now i’ll have to do it later anyways..which is something he
had mentioned that he feels like if he didnt leave now he felt he would later or something. Then I said please dont as least think about it more and he
got a little tense and said okay ill think about it more but i cant promise anything and im like okay and that was the end of the call.
It seemed like a small part of the reason because he loves me in general. Next morning I begged and pleaded him to stay.
He said a mix of IDK’s and I can’t. I finally gave in and said fine etc. I told him I d send his stuff back when I got home. He told
me to keep it and that he wouldnt throw away the stuff I gave him- he wanted to keep it. (random people shaped bubble wands
-princess and army guy I gave him when we first met, and my hair clips he took with him by accident). I told him if he didnt
want me that why would he want my memory and he said he does want me and still loves me but can’t be with me. I told him
it didnt make sense and he could have me and that he was stressed from the past not right now- because things would change
for the better. He kept our relationship status and picture up the rest of the day even though we broke up and he was online
-he is the kind to change things right away. The next day he took it down. I was devastated and wrote to him that I felt
like I was dying and paragraphs of how hurt I was. He said he couldnt give me a chance and can’t be with me anymore but
that he would always love me and remember me. Then he repeated at the end I will always love you, goodbye. He kept
me as a facebook friend but as soon as I read your website about how to get him back I started revamping my fb and
put a new picture up. Guys like it and I was posting on my guy friends wall which isn’t something I did for a while-like
funny meme’s etc. He got upset I think and put a new picture up immediately. I noticed he had added two
girls and texted him asking if he liked them and thats why he left- he said no he didnt and it didnt have to do with that.
Then he got very mean and started adding alllll the girls he had cheated on me from the past 2 years-ones he didn’t talk to even or rejected him or were
with someone else and pregnant etc. He added a mix of guy friends too to make it seem less obvious. He then added a line of lyrics from
the song from august burns red-treatment which if you look it up is about someone being controlling/routine like and making others
feel like they’re not good enough. The song was very mean and harsh. The line he put up wasn’t but I knew he knew Id see it and look it up.
He also put a line “so I go back to the remedy” from the song remedy by seether. Kept adding the girls etc. I was supposed to come
see him the weekend of his birthday to celebrate both of ours and see a concert with him ,we were super excited but because
of my injury it couldn’t happen which stressed things out worse. I started the no contact thing too. I wished him a happy birthday
through text and he was excited and said thanks *name*! That was pretty much it- said yw. Next day I see on his fb that
around that time I had said happy birthday he had posted this status ” writing a symphony for the end of the world…” and he said in it
that it wasn’t sad or violent- just for closure. His friend said he cant wait to hear it and he said something like think of it more
as a requiem and that he ll hear it but good things take time. That’s pretty much were things are right now. I feel like he
is actually dealing with his pain-maybe im wrong. Which means maybe he wont come back. Im an absolute wreck. I
just want him back so badly and Im in shock mode bc he usually comes back. I was going to send a birthday card
so he would have something physical to hold and would remind him of me. He’s the sensitive type mostly. He was trying
to send me one but I wasn’t going to be home to get it ( he can’t send it to my parents since they didnt know about him-except my mom).
I don’t know what to do at all. He is the insecure, sensitive but stubborn and angry type. When he’s angry he doesnt think as clear.
But I feel like he calmed down just now and Im afraid the closure status and the fact that he’s writing a piece for it is the end.
I dont know what to think. Its sad to know that he used to write me songs and now he’s doing it to get closure on us. He can
be negative and when he’s depressed and angry he usually says and does things he doesnt mean. When he gave me a hard
time about getting back with me those other times I left he said sorry and he was just confused and angry when I came back bc
he didnt expect it but was angry I left. Im sure Im missing something. My fear with sending you this is that you wont read it all
and if I miss details maybe I’ll get the wrong advice. I think that’s how hurt I am write now…and super fearful if I don’t tell you
what I know I’ll lose my chance with him for good. He told me once that everything I think about other guys- put it out the window
because he s absolutely different. This is the worst pain I have ever ever been in my life and 10x worse than any other break up.
Please please help me, Im desperate to get him back. We were ridiculously in love to the craziest point -hence trying this
so much. I even offered moving there but he said earlier it would take too long etc. and he probably is depressed and
thinks it has no chance. We used to talk every single night, I offered him not to if he couldn’t but he said he had to hear my
voice…this is in general during the relationship. Do I have a chance? What do I do? Should I send the card to keep me on his mind? Should I fight for him
back like the other times where after 3 weeks of fighting he came back? Idk. I am LOST. Thank you for reading and trying to
help me.

admin

October 5, 2013 at 4:56 am

You have taken it…

The record for the longest comment happened over 3 months ago. It was 3,700 words but YOU won it haha. 4,000 words this comment is and I gotta say I am impressed you actually stuck with it and wrote. Props to you! It literally takes me a couple of hours to crank out 4k words.

Yes you have a chance. But only if you don’t act needy or desperate.

So, I went through your comment and didnt see you mention NC at all?
Melanie

October 5, 2013 at 3:01 pm

Im sorry. Thanks for reading it. Basically I was doing no contact…2 days, then his birthday came up and I said happy birthday. He said thanks melanie! which surprised me since he has been mean with his actions on fb.1) My fear is since we have done this back and forth lingo , when i come back in a month he ll be like oh the samme thing of course! And idk if I mentioned in there I originally said to him i might leave and im thinking about it ,so idk if I egged him on. 2)Do you know why it went from a temp break to him leaving for good? 3)And if he said he still loves and wants me (but cant be with me ) is that a good sign 4) Did he want me to keep his items for a reason? since they’re personal to him when he was a kid and stuff and the ring?
5) Is he trying to make me jealous or get over me with adding those girls?
6) Why did he keep me as a fb friend if he s not treating me like a friend
7) If he s already writing a symphony for closure does this mean he is over me or is close and he s wrapping it up ? Because I know you guys said men dont deal with their feelings until a month later, but it seems like that means he’s sad now and is.
8) I did visit his home state and we have memories but the out of sight out of mind thing scares me…if I disappear for one month, if he contacts me and I sont answer im scared he’ll delete my only way of knowing whats going on as his friend on fb. How do I handle that?
9) Im so so sorry for all the stuff- I feel bad but this is absolutely killing me and Im terrified.
admin

October 6, 2013 at 12:25 am

1. The lingo will come back but only with time.
2. What reason did he give you for the breakup?
3. I think its just a smokescreen I wouldn’t read to much into his words more into his actions.
4. Maybe it hurt to see you.
5. Maybe, or maybe he is just stroking his ego.
6. Probably to spy on your profile.

Thats all I am answering I have to be smart with my time.
melanie

October 17, 2013 at 4:30 am

Does their “relationship” have to have a label for it to be a rebound or is him hanging/talking to her as more than friends count as a rebound?

Also could a guy whose this angry at you, and saying hateful things ever want you back? (towards the end He told me he still loved me and wanted me but the stress was killing him-which I know was true because its come up many times before.) I dont understand this cruelty he’s displaying now though and if this means he doesn’t love me anymore or won’t want me back. :/
admin

October 17, 2013 at 6:17 pm

No it doesn’t have to have a label.
melanie

October 15, 2013 at 3:45 pm

I feel pretty much like dying right now. So I basically broke and sent my guy a few cute texts. He put up on facebook these lyrics about how angry he is and that I destroyed him and I cant put him back together. Then he put ” Down on the floor, craving for more..thats all she’s ever known!” …and before that he put “Dont know what im going to do, gona come apart at the seems before days end”…and the girl he’s talking to commented and he said cute, “her name”, are your sewing skills adequate enough to sew me back together? And he commented on keeping his male parts on there jokefully.

It feels like he sees me in an awful light and he’s moving on and really likes this girl?

Idk if its too late for me to salvage this, even though I need to and its killing me. He basically kept me as a friend to torture me it seems. Do you think its too late and what do you think is going on? Im afraid she isnt a rebound and he hates me for good.
admin

October 16, 2013 at 2:26 am

I am so sorry to hear that :/.

Go back into NC. I wish you hadn’t broken it.

She is still in rebound territory. If their relationship hits 6-7 months I would begin getting worrried a bit.
Melanie

October 9, 2013 at 3:16 am

I mean is going for her immediately so is it something I should worry about? I broke NC after 1 week just to ask him about a package outside my apartment since im injured..hopefully that doesnt count via text.
admin

October 10, 2013 at 12:31 am

Yea you will have to start over on NC unfortunately.
Melanie

October 8, 2013 at 6:20 am

Sorry parts are unclear. He made our break up official in the first sentence. And she s liking everything on his profile is what i meant**
Melanie

October 8, 2013 at 6:19 am

So I read your rebound page and all. I just feel like I’ve been stabbed in the heart. He was contemplating our break up before he met this chic and made it official the day he met her .. not sure if it was before or after (leaning towards before?). When I texted him if he likes her or this other girl he added fresh after our break up on fb he said no. Now he is really talking her up/ she likes everything and worst of all he changed his profile pic to one she took of him playing ( none of his band mates just him). He put credit to her and then put the same picture again in its full version re-crediting her and commenting on a shirt he’s wearing that she likes bc its German. It seems like he s trying hard for her. We were in a 2 yr relationship that ended a week ago. Does he like this girl? He’s giving her alot of attention. Can you please tell me any thoughts you have? :'(
admin

October 9, 2013 at 1:54 am

Stabbed in the heart is never good :(.

I think a part of him does like her. I mean, you do like rebounds in the beginning always but its the long run that relaly matters.

Plus there is always a honeymoon period in the beginning of a relationship.
Melanie

October 6, 2013 at 6:06 am

The reason for the breakup was basically that he couldn’t do it anymore, and he was afraid I would go back to guilting him for the past etc. He said he still loves and wants me but cant be with me. Now he’s chatting up girls he told me he didn’t like…And Sorry.
admin

October 7, 2013 at 12:00 am

Ok, the girls stuff he is probably doing to stroke his ego don’t take it too personally.

I think time just has to go by in your situation. I know that scares you but it really isn’t that scary of a thing.
Melanie

October 5, 2013 at 3:07 pm

I forgot to mention I about to send him a birthday card. I know he’s very visual and physical so before I walk out of his life for one month I thought if I leave a trace of myself with him thats recent it will make him think more or miss me-especially since its an LDR. I have funny little pictures I drew on it(which may jog his memory of stuff we did or used to laugh about) and nothing mushy in the content just nice wishes. Def much shorter than this. That okay?

Faith

October 4, 2013 at 3:14 am

my ex boyfriend and I dated for almost a year. but things got rocky in the end because of trust issues, the distance getting to us, and just us not getting along so much anymore, although we still do love each other. We ended with him telling me he was falling for somebody else.
I was wondering….before I went NC, my now ex bf and I agreed we would have nothing to do with each other ever again. We said it out of anger I guess, because honestly I still love him and want him back even though he now is talking to a new girl. I also told him to just pay me back whatever he owed me & then left just like that the last time we talked. He called me the next day and I didn’t answer, he then texted me to ask whether or not I wanted him to pay me back in full and what not but I didn’t want to reply and instead ignored it.
1. Should I have answered him?
2. If we made the “cut all strings” and never talk, will it make a difference if I do an NC period because he would have already known I didn’t want to talk anymore? (even though i still do want to talk to him and get back with him).

Thanks for all of your help! I have been reading around your blog and everything is so helpful

admin

October 4, 2013 at 9:44 pm

1. No
2. Yes it does kind of mess it up but NC still can be effective.

Rebecca

October 3, 2013 at 7:44 pm

Hey there – My boyfriend and I had a fight (granted it was like 5am his time and he was beyond exhausted from work.. I was telling him my work transfer timeline so that he’d have an idea of when I could be in the same city.. but he got distracted and started talking to someone else while I was on the phone.. so I called him out on it cause I didn’t really have a lot of time to waste – had an all-nighter’s worth of work to do and he was being inconsiderate) and broke things off after two years. Things had been a bit shaky and frustrating over the last few months.. and I got mad, made a rash comment about breaking up.. Three days went by NC. We apologized for getting angry and harsh. But now he’s saying he’s just reached a breaking point and can’t do it anymore. In the last few months, he’s been overly negative about the distance issue, just couldn’t see how or when we’d be in the same city (we are currently separated by an ocean and pesky immigration officers). He’s moving to the other side of the US in a couple of months for work (once he is in the states we could get 3 tickets for what we are currently paying for 1 now.. which means I can see him far more often until I’d completely move out there a few months later).. But he says he just can’t do it anymore. He’s swearing off LDRs. He says he’s not built for it. He says he loves me and wants me in his life and doesn’t never want to see me again.. but he’s got nothing left to give anymore and needs to take some time completely detached to invest in himself. He’s tired, overworked, he’s got no time for himself, he’s just maxed out. He doesn’t know how long getting back to 100% will take but he says it could take a month, 6 months, a year.. He tells me it’d be unfair to ask me to wait for him when he can’t even promise how he’d feel about me at the end of it all. First problem: Once he comes around, if he still loves me, it would still be LDR and he couldn’t (well he could but he definitely wouldn’t since he wouldn’t have the right to) then ask me to move to where he is. That makes me think this decision is a death sentence for us. Second problem: I booked a flight for a week or two from now to surprise him before we broke up.. now that we are broken up (it’s been a week).. he’s called to check on me and to make sure i’m ok.. still loves me but is very set on that he needs time for himself and can’t be in a relationship right now with me or anyone. He says he will think about me coming. Wants to see me but feels like it would just hurt both of us more. I’ve decided to go on the trip, whether or not I see him… But I know him.. He will contact me and he will try to see me if I go. Meanwhile, he will not have changed his mind. It is an expensive ticket and would be a shame to waste. I don’t know what to do. I can buy an onward ticket to see other friends and leave him deserted.. but I feel like he would be upset if I came to his city and purposefully did not see him. I have some things of his to drop off, but I don’t even want to do that. It’s nothing he needs anyway. Helllpppp 🙁

admin

October 4, 2013 at 1:17 am

Well, you probably do need to give him his stuff back and that is completely ok to do.
Rebecca

October 4, 2013 at 3:13 am

I mean.. it’s a tshirt and an empty box.. I’ll leave it with his porter. As for NC, though..? :-/
admin

October 4, 2013 at 9:41 pm

Yea do it! NC I mean.
Rebecca

October 5, 2013 at 12:36 am

thanks 🙂 i’ll do it. i’m still going on the trip to his country.. he knows im coming.. he expects to see me.. i know if i’m there he will want to.. but i’ll blow it off and spend time elsewhere with other friends. NC will end 1 week after my bday, 2 days before the anniversary, and 1 week before his bday. was just curious if i should wait to start contacting again until after cause i’m sure he’d expect me to text around those events. thanks for your patience.. it can’t be easy dealing with girls who feel hurt.
admin

October 5, 2013 at 4:43 am

Keep me updated PLEASE!
Rebecca

October 4, 2013 at 3:14 am

Also concerned that 30 days NC is up just after my bday (do I thank him for Happy bday message??) and just before our would-be anniversary and his bday (wondering if I should really wait until after those both pass. That would be like.. 45 days NC.
admin

October 4, 2013 at 9:45 pm

No I think you are fine just to proceed as normal. I mean NC ends after your B-Day right?

Janae

October 3, 2013 at 10:49 am

Sorry, I keep leaving so much comments haha, but this sites really helping me so far. Just wanted to ask a few questions:
1)Is it going to be more difficult for me to get him back since I’m a senior in highschool and he just graduated recently?
2)I did NC for 33 days, then I did the first contact (which went really well thanks to you! :D), but during the no contact he texted me twice and ended each text with “Love,___” is this a good sign? (That’s proably a stupid question haha)
3)My next contact is going to be the meme(we both love memes and failblog)! I’m quite excited for this, but is there anything I should accompany with this text? Like should I say something like “Thought you might appreciate this 😛 ” with the meme?
Sorry for all the questions I just really want this to go right and everything you’ve told me has been a big help, and this site, too 😀

admin

October 4, 2013 at 12:45 am

1. It will make it a little more difficult.

2. Yes I think it is :).

3. Hmmm… I think the “thought you’d like this” type of comment would work well here.

Korie

October 3, 2013 at 1:09 am

My ex and I broke up a week ago. We had been together for almost a year. At first we got along perfectly and everyone envied how he looked at me like I hung the moon and how amazing he treated me. We rarely ever argued and always had an amazing time together. I moved into his house with him in April and that made our relationship even better. He use to be a player back in college and it took him 6 months to tell me he loved me. I’m the only girl he has ever said it too. His family was excited to see him keep me because he rarely stayed with girls for long. He soon went and worked on the pipeline out of town and that’s when our problems began. We had trust issues. In July he got an amazing job and finally came home yet things state rocky. I moved back home with my family and he came with me (money issues) well at the end of August he moved back home to his grandparents. I was perfectly fine with it. He was always with me anyways. Well he developed a heart condition and was let go from his new job. Safety reasons. Last week we got into a HUGE fight. I went home and he went out with his friends. I called him the next morning and he said he wanted to talk about things. We met up and agreed to a break (with rules like no dating, only sex with each other…etc) two days in he rarely spoke to me and seemed annoyed when I talked to him about us. Eventually we agreed to just end it. I was crushed and so was he. Saturday night we agreed to go out but not go to the same place. I told him to not come to the bar that I was going to. He showed up. And he came back home with me. The next day he spent the afternoon with my family and I. Monday I called to talk to him and he said he was moving three hours away 🙁 well everytime we have talked he always asks me who I am with, where I am going, calls me baby/babe, tells me he isn’t talking to anyone else, tells me he loves me, and that he just needs space for himself. He told me he feels completely lost and it seemed like he had nothing in life. Everyday I tell him to have an amazing day and to always smile. He called me last night and told me about his day and asked about mine. And the end of the conversation I told him I loved him and he quickly said it back. I’m just lost on what to do. I love him with all my heart and I know he is the one for me but if he needs time for himself….what do I do in the meantime? He is a very strong willed man and when I talk about getting back together he says “yes but not right now.” It’s frustrates me. HELPPPPP.

admin

October 4, 2013 at 12:00 am

Well, I would suggest to use this guide. Start off by NC and just follow this.

Twilight

October 2, 2013 at 7:34 pm

My LDR bf broke up with me after my last visit with him 12 days ago. I’ve been doing 30 days NC since. He hasn’t bothered to contact me in between yet. It’s day 12 of NC today. We used to speak daily for two years and see each other every few weeks. He seemed so cold to me last time I visited. What if he never tried to contact me or responds?

admin

October 3, 2013 at 1:47 am

Well, then you will contact him.

Mary

October 2, 2013 at 6:12 pm

Hey, my ex broke up with me because i cheated on him, with my best friend, who is a girl. We were really drunk and it was something stupid to try out, tho I stopped it because it felt wrong. I am 100% straight and he knows that. He is mostly mad because I didn’t tell him about it until 1,5 months later and he said he doesn’t trust me anymore, he is done with us, and he is done with ldr’s.

We had a really good relationship, it was great tbh, until I did this, and I regret it so much.
Do you think he may take me back? That this could work? I’m afriad the NC rule will make him move on from me not make him come back..

I know he still has some feelings for me, tho he is still angry at me, he did love me very much but now he is so cold towards me.

admin

October 3, 2013 at 1:48 am

Cheating is always a toughie. You may need to give him time. I know you are concerned about NC but I think it is ideal in your situation.

Kel

October 2, 2013 at 1:09 am

I really really really need help….
My ex and I started dating when I was 16 (I’m 21 now) and we were together for almost 2 years before we broke up…NOT LDR at the time. We were off and on for awhile but called it off because he decided to move back to Utah, and here’s where the LDR comes in…
Right before I graduated h.s. in 2010 was when he moved..we still kept in contact and remained good friends, and sometimes talked about being more again someday…well we got back together November 2010 LONG DISTANCE, I even went out to visit him in December. We eventually began talking and exploring the option of me moving out there to be with him, and in April of 2011 that is what happened.
We lived together for about 5 months. Everything was great for the first 2 months of so, then we started fighting over trivial things…coworkers of his who would flirt with him, the fact that I am a smoker and he had recently quit, me quitting my job because the hours were not suitable to me…we even broke up for about a week while I was living out there. But we worked it out.
Until we got in a really big fight about how he didn’t think I was mature enough to be out on my own. The fight ultimately led to me moving back to CO, with the agreement that we would give it at least 6 months and try again.
Well it’s been over 2 years, and we have both dated 2 people since then…
We still talk on occasion, every few months or so, even when one of us is dating someone else..we make small talk and once in awhile bring up memories of the ‘good times’…
I can go 30 days without talking to him, I already have, so no contact is no big deal.
However, about 3 months ago, I drunk texted him in the middle of the night a verrrry long text message recapping our entire relationship, saying how much I missed him and wish we could go back to the way things had been, and how I was sorry I messed up when I lived out there.
He called me the next day to make sure I was okay, and we talked and I apologized for everything…he said I shouldn’t be sorry and that he’d always be here for me, even living 500 miles away…
A week later I found out on facebook that he got engaged. To a girl he’s only been with for about 8 months now.
I called him after I found out…Naturally I congratulated him but I know he sensed the hurt because he asked if I was okay…I said sure and we have not talked much since then because I don’t want to overstep any boundaries. But I want him back so much, he still means the world to me after all this time…so my questions to you are…..
1. With him being engaged to someone else, and me being a state away, is there even anything I can do to salvage what we had and start over with him? Is there any way to find out if he even wants that without coming right out and asking him?
2. If it’s possible, where do I start!?!?!?
PLEASE help me, I miss him so much and he is supposed to be getting married in 6 months…I know many of you are probably judging because he is a taken man and I am still taken with only possibilities…but I miss him so much and I have debated just driving out there without even telling him first and just seeing what happens…
Please help.

admin

October 3, 2013 at 12:15 am

Honestly, I think you should throw in the towel. I mean, if he is engaged to someone else it may be time to move on.

Isabel

October 1, 2013 at 4:18 pm

I sent the I have a confession to make text to my ex boyfriend, he responded “haha okay 🙂 you really scared me”. Two days later I texted him asking what exactly scared him and got no response. It was the wrong thing to send him I suppose.

So I will wait at least a week before I text him again. How should my next text be? Similar to a first contact text?

admin

October 2, 2013 at 12:45 am

Yes similar to a first contact text!

Connie

October 1, 2013 at 2:51 pm

Hi Chris,

I have done my 30 days NC yesterday and sent my first text to my ex today, he replied in 5 mins.

Me: I was watching hangover 3 on tv, it reminds me you dropped some ketchup on your white pants before we go into cinema, I laugh out when I think about this.

Ex: yes that was fun, how are you?

Me (replied after an hour): Im good thanks, I have to meet my friend now, will talk to you soon 🙂

then I dont get any more replies from him, is it good enough? Now how long should I wait to text him again? should I move to ‘remember the good times’ yet or keep chit chat a bit? Im really surprise that he replied me, as I expected he would ignore the text.

admin

October 2, 2013 at 12:41 am

That was perfect!

You just need to initiate another text in a few days the next step.
Connie

October 4, 2013 at 9:57 am

I sent him a meme today but get no response from him so far… 🙁 I think I have to back to NC again… my next text should be meme again or remember the good times??
admin

October 4, 2013 at 10:06 pm

Lets wait and see if he responds to the meme first. He could be busy.
Connie

October 5, 2013 at 9:37 pm

Nope he didn’t reply at all… and I text him again today also no reply but he has read the text… 🙁 well.. I think I should give up…: (
admin

October 6, 2013 at 12:28 am

Or maybe he just needs more time?

anna

September 30, 2013 at 11:42 pm

I was in a ldr and cheated on my boyfriend once. He found out and broke up with me. I really regretted ever since and had time to think about it. I know that he still loves me and I love him. What should I do?

admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:41 am

Pretty much follow this page.

He may need extra time to cope though.

Suzy

September 30, 2013 at 11:37 pm

Hi Chris! Sorry this is such a long message…I really need your help!
My LDR (now ex) bf and I had dated for 10 months. We met in person on our 3rd month anniversary in January, and then again in May/June for three weeks this summer. Everything was fine, except for one argument we had, which was him being jealous that I texted my ex to wish him a happy birthday. So i retorted saying he texted his ex a few days before telling her congrats, so it he shouldn’t have gotten onto my case. We got into an argument and he decided to let me win and deleted his ex’s number and told me he will never contact her again. So he went back to his state and in the beginning of August, he started working a lot. We only had about an hour a day to talk to each other and I got sad because we used to talk all the time. The one day he finally doesn’t have work was our 9 month anniversary, in which he forgot about and went to hang out with friends. I don’t mind that he went out with friends, it’s the fact that he plans something with his friends the moment he gets free time, and doesn’t think about me. We were to make it up the next day but he said he forgot he made plans to help his cousin with her move to a new house. So I freaked out because I didn’t know when he will ever make time to hang out with me, so while he was out I sent him a long message telling him how we were to break up because he has not been giving me time. He cried and I ignored him for 2 hours. I called him back and he turned cold, but I wanted him back and regretted what I said and did. He went to see his ex girlfriend the day after to hang out and I got mad at that since he told me he deleted her number, turns out he said he knows it by heart and admitted to lying to me that he will never contact her again. I asked him if he wanted to get back with her and he said they were just friends. He said he never wanted for us to break up, but he wanted us to take it slow. So he hung out with her again a week later after texting her that week and I freaked out and told him I couldn’t handle him talking to his ex gf he dated for way longer than me. He decided to pacify me I guess and we got back together that day. I was so happy i wanted to redeem myself and not be clingy, but it was hard not to because he still started to hang out and go out even more so often and I started becoming even more clingy than I was before. (A little side note: when we first started dating, he was the clingy one and cried after every time I went to see friends, so I stopped hanging out so often, maybe I go out once a month so I can stay home to talk to him and watch movies and all that). I guess he got tired of me constantly being mad that he was out (i think it should have been understandable that I got mad he went out, since he gets mad when I do). So we were “together” until our 10 month anniversary (a month of being together after breaking up), he and I got into a huge argument about how he doesn’t seem to try, and never seems to try to converse with me anymore. So he went out after our argument with his guy friend who also invited a gal pal of his. He called me at 2AM after his hang out with his friend and broke up with me. I asked him to give me another chance but he said not now, he wants to get to know himself more. He changed so much because he always told me he wanted to get married with me at 25 (he is almost 20) and such, but he suddenly says he doesn’t know if he wants to commit so early. He suggested we have a break for a while and see other people. I didn’t want to be just friends” with him, and constantly told him I couldn’t stand being his friend while I watch him see other people. I couldn’t move on (even now I can’t) since I love him and care for him deeply. He would always cry and tell me he wanted me to stay his friend. And not be strangers. A few days before us breaking up I had a pregnancy scare. He immediately wanted me to get an abortion but I was iffy on killing a life. This whole “lets stay friends” ended yesterday. Within those 20 days of being friends, he started hanging out with this new girl (the one he met the night he went out with his guy friend) more and more. I got jealous and told him to stop seeing her, because he will fall for her since she is physically there for him and I’m not. It would ruin my chances for being with him. He ignored my pleas and said he and her are just friends, so was him and I, so I can’t control him while we were broken up. I guess I tried so hard that it drove him to go to the dog park with her and her dog (along with his dog) and he kissed her on that date. He called me the next day (after his date) and told me we should really take time off away to calm down and be friends after. I asked him if he still will get back with me, he says that he feels that he has fallen for the new girl and really likes her and likes the way things are in his life right now. He also told me that he has lost feelings for me for a while since we broke up the first time and said I hurt him. I guess his new girl feels the same because she still continues to see him and text him all day. They aren’t FB official but it doesn’t matter, he is still seeing her. I have confirmed I am not pregnant today, but I mean, the fact that he left me without thinking of what to do with the baby besides getting an abortion and working things out. So pretty much I haven’t talked to him since yesterday. I was thinking of doing the NC for awhile, but do you think that it won’t work at all because he has a new girl in his life that he has fallen for?

admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:43 am

I think it is essential not just for him but for you.
Suzy

October 1, 2013 at 2:12 am

Is it best to just leave him with his new girl, or should I try to win him back? I really want him back, but there seems to me no chance for me because I’m not a driving distance away like she is to him :
admin

October 1, 2013 at 11:47 pm

I think for now the best thing to do is focus on YOU. Just do NC before you reach out.
Suzy

October 2, 2013 at 3:26 am

Okay, I have definitely been working on improving myself for my own benefit these two days 🙂 It’s just…his birthday is in 25 days so I’m not sure if I should even wish him a happy birthday knowing that he will be out anyway with his new gal friend…
admin

October 3, 2013 at 12:45 am

I wouldn’t message him on his birthday. I would do it a few days after.

Janae

September 30, 2013 at 9:23 am

Okay, he is quite confusing! haha Like said he wrote me last night, but when I wrote him today, no response. Whenever he had written me before it was usually late at night (Not quite sure why)but in case he doesn’t write by tomorrow, I know you said to wait a week before trying something again. What would be an example of what to say after waiting another week in case he doesn’t respond to the text?
Nichola

September 29, 2013 at 10:08 am

I have a big problem about how to get back my ex. When we broke up I read blogs about how to get your ex back I did the “No contact rule” and yes it’s quite effective because I did it not almost a week then he message me saying “Sup, woman? I just wanted to check on you and see how you doing”. I replied to him I said.. ” I’m alright, you were right about what’s best for us getting apart. I go out wit my friends and exploring new things”. <– Those things tried to say to him that i'm alright and I don't care about the break up anymore and being friendly to him. But after 3 days I've come to check on his profile. He posted something in his wall that he might seek a female that would have a good chemistry with him I felt insecure and I texted him like this..
Me: So you'll look for another girl.
My ex: Probably not.
Me: Why?
My ex: Don't really feel like it.
Me: What do you plan?
My ex: Being alone until I feel lonely.
Me: Then?
My ex: I dunno, maybe I'll come back to you, maybe I'll wait until the "perfect woman" comes along. Not quite sure yet.
Me: Come back to me?
My ex: Yeah, maybe. Probably not though, since I want you to be happy without me.
I lose to my weak side..

Then he texted me again after a week..

My ex: Hey, are you okay? I just saw on the news some big-ass storm hit a town in the Phillipines, and I wanted to make sure you were okay.

Me: Yes.

My ex: Okay, good.
My ex: I was a little worried about you, so I thought I'd make sure you were okay.

Me: It's alright, thanks.

I can't complete the three weeks of No contact..

I was a bit sad knowing that this page can't help me with my problem of getting back my ex since we haven't see each other in person. We were in a relationship for almost a month..He's from USA and I'm from the Philippines. I know it's hard. I just don't want to give up because I really loved him.

admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:31 am

Well the main problem I see is that you say you can’t complete the three weeks of NC. You kind of have to.

Carolyn

September 29, 2013 at 2:28 am

I’ve been in no contact for 2 weeks and so far he’s texted me twice. My birthday is coming up in a couple days. What if he says happy birthday should I just say thanks and not talk to him again or just ignore it? Also how should I respond if he just randomly texts me saying he misses me?

admin

September 30, 2013 at 12:34 am

I say ignore it. Don’t respond.
Carolyn

September 30, 2013 at 12:52 am

Ok and if he never tells me happy birthday or doesnt try to contact me again should I take that as a bad sign?
admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:46 am

Nope it shouldn’t affect you at all.
Carolyn

October 1, 2013 at 11:26 pm

So he just sent me a text saying “okay don’t talk to me.” He’s obviously mad that I’m ignoring him. When the month is up and i text him i dont want him to not answer.Is he supposed to react this way?
admin

October 2, 2013 at 1:17 am

If you feel that he will get really really angry you can give him a little rope with a small text message.

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