How To Get A Long Distance Relationship Ex Boyfriend Back

5,234 thoughts on “The Complete Guide To Getting An Ex Boyfriend Back In A Long Distance Relationship”

Michelle

September 28, 2013 at 1:47 pm

I finished my 30 days and we started talking again. He was so receptive, interested, telling me he missed me, wishing I was there, etc. I didn’t follow your timeline of talking about the potential for a relationship our first FaceTime, but throughout the past three weeks I’ve stayed very much in control and busy. He had talked about two visits to see me, one the first weekend of November and one in January. I told him he couldn’t come unless he was ready to talk about our relationship. Few days later, he said he hadn’t booked any flights bc he didn’t know. He said he KNOWS we would be happy together but he feels like he would be holding me back career wise bc there might not be as many opportunities for me where he lives (where we would be if chose to be together). Honestly, he’s been saying that for the past year and a half and I was tired of it so I just told him I needed to go to bed. We haven’t talked now for 3 days which maybe is ok since he’s clearly never going to change. I need advice! Do i finally just towel?

admin

September 30, 2013 at 12:00 am

Only if you think its best for your situation.

What do you think?
Michelle

September 30, 2013 at 1:32 am

I don’t know how to have a productive conversation about his concern.
admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:43 am

Well, that is a problem.

Tell me specifically what confuses you.
Michelle

October 1, 2013 at 7:09 pm

He acts like we are together but then says he doesn’t know if it will work out long term. I messed up this time and went from awesome fun girl to ending the convo, going to bed, and got emotional retweeting a tweet about not settling for someone who doesn’t give you everything. I can’t change where I come from and I feel like it gets held over my head as why we can’t be together. I just want him to be optimistic about being with me!
admin

October 2, 2013 at 12:58 am

I am not a fan of twitter because of stuff like that.

Kit

September 27, 2013 at 9:22 am

What do I do if he’s blocked me on Facebook. (For no obvious reason besides breaking up)?

admin

September 28, 2013 at 2:53 am

Just realize if you follow the steps on the site or the E-Book you will have a chance to get re-added after NC.

Janae

September 26, 2013 at 9:09 am

Okay, so my NC is almost up and I’m really nervous! I have already planned out what I was going to say for the first contact after no contact and I wanted to run it by you to see if you think it’s too much/too little. I plan on waiting until it gets dark out so this text makes sense, “I just went stargazing for the first time in like forever and I thought of you. It made me smile honestly 🙂 Remember when we used to do that?” should I rephrase anything? I’m pretty confident about it, but I just want this to go well 🙂 Thanks

admin

September 27, 2013 at 5:37 am

I would just take out the honestly.

Just say “it made me smile!”
Janae

September 27, 2013 at 7:29 am

Thanks so much for your feedback! 🙂 I’ll keep you posted
Janae

September 29, 2013 at 10:28 am

I’m so stoked right now! I have one more day until I end NC (33 days) and he just wrote me tonight! :)Can’t wait to see what happens tomorrow, you are so amazing for all your help :D!!
Janae

September 30, 2013 at 11:12 am

Ahh,Iknow him all too well! He did end up writing me late at night 🙂 He brought up some music we both used to love to listened to and I said something casual but friendly back and I ended it by saying goodnight 🙂 YOU’RE A GENIUS! Im so giddy with happiness right now haha 😀
admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:48 am

SWEET!
admin

September 29, 2013 at 11:30 pm

Thanks! Keep us all updated 🙂

rebound girl

September 23, 2013 at 11:01 pm

my ex and i were in a LDR for almost 3 years. in july he left me for another woman. during this time he tried very hard to convince everyone he was in a “friend” relationship with her and flaunted her on fb. all the while he kept telling me i love you. she was a local and spent weekends with him. they broke up last week and now he’s posting sad/depressing posts and songs that allude to me on his wall but then again who knows. i’m not even sure he’s angry, sad and hurt over me or if he’s coming back. what do you think ?

admin

September 24, 2013 at 3:01 am

Hard to say.

I think what you need to do is figure out if you want him back or not. Do you?
miley

September 24, 2013 at 5:06 pm

I dont know. Sonce their breakup he hasnt contacted me. Maybe he doesnt want to even when he has said he wants to

Malin

September 20, 2013 at 9:26 pm

So me and my ex had been together over a year, we were long distance for most of it. He does live in the same town as me, but he’s a trades guy, and there isn’t much for work around here for his particular trade. We broke up because of the distance, because he thinks he can’t handle it again since he doesn’t know if he’ll be back home, or working out of town again once he’s done school in November.

I handled the whole break up pretty well, I’d say. I didn’t scream or beg him to reconsider. It was “mutual”, I agreed and told him i understood where he’s coming from, and he wanted to end it on a good note to leave it open later on, rather then force it and break up horribly in a few months.

I’m currently doing no contact, although I haven’t told him that, I just haven’t said anything to him since I left his house last. I have set a goal that I can’t contact him until it has been 4 weeks, unless he contacts me first, of course. In 4 weeks it will be the Thanksgiving weekend, which he will be home for. I plan to not contact him until after he’s gone back to school after thanksgiving. The 17th is actually the first scheduled Pittsburgh/Philadelphia NHL game(He’s the philadelphia fan, I’m for pittsburgh, they’re rivals. and he even bought me a Penguins jersey for my birthday..), anyways, I’m planning on texting him and saying “Hey! I’m watching the game tonight, got me wondering, how’re you doing?”

I’m just wondering if that’s a good way to initiate contact with him? I feel like it’s the right amount of innocent/fond memory/caring. I just don’t know.

admin

September 21, 2013 at 10:58 pm

I actually do think it is a good idea. Make it more interesting though. Find a way to spice it up a little bit.
Malin

September 22, 2013 at 12:44 am

Hopefully his team loses that night, maybe I can tease him about it? I used to do that normally. Is that spicing it up? Haha
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:43 pm

I wouldn’t tease him about it because it may just make him angry.
Malin

September 23, 2013 at 12:26 am

I’m not too sure how to spice it up then.

Leigh

September 20, 2013 at 9:09 pm

As 30 days has passed, I don’t want him back. As you predicted it, which is great cause I can see for myself that it won’t work between us in LDR as he attains all the bad qualities for making it work and I have all the good… unfortunately.

But nevertheless I used this tactic as I still want to be friends with him (he’s a great guy) and want to be on speaking terms with him again.

I sent him a “Guess what?” message, he replied almost instantly. I waited the precious 60 minutes before replying with a memory message and he responded pretty instantly after that too! His response was good and not cold at all and I said goodnight and left it at that.

So thanks, you’ve really helped me to get him to talk to me, since we share the same group of friends whenever he is back home!

admin

September 21, 2013 at 10:56 pm

Well I am so glad to hear this. Wow, everyone is having epiphanies today haha.

If you need help on moving on from your ex I can help you with that as well!
Leigh

September 22, 2013 at 5:15 pm

UPDATE: I saw him last night at a friends get together and the results were quite surprising… he was constantly nudging me with his elbow, flicking me, flexing his muscles, asking if I want to feel his muscles (whats up with him and his muscles? haha)sitting next to me, talking to me, we got along really well and when we hugged goodbye he gave me the tightest hug I’ve ever received from him. Only problem is that we was drunk during all this, does that alter anything? Just out of curiosity…

I do want to move on from him but after last night I also want him, tricky scenario! 🙁
admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:26 pm

Wants you to feel his muscles??? Wow…..

Hahahahaa.

Megan

September 20, 2013 at 5:00 pm

Hey, so I came across this site and I thought, why not?

So my LDR and I have been together for a little over 2 years.. This past year, he entered the military. I am perfectly fine with him being in the military bcuz it’s his life – do what you want to do. I’ve always been very supportive, never complained about it. I’m a junior in college so I know a job comes first.

Anyways. This past year there has been drama between his mother and I and no matter how many times I apologized to her (even though I seriously never did anything wrong – she is just a very over protective mother and when he left for BCT that’s when her ugly side came out) she never apologized to me and made my LDR feel guilty for loving me.

Well, he broke up with me back in June.. He came home a week later and we ended up having sex and he told me he was officially over..
It broke my heart.. He has never been such a jerk before..

When he left to go back down to his duty unit which is over a 1,000 miles away, one week he was texting me and snapchatting me first. Asking me how work was going and showing me what he was doing.. We would be like this for a week where he would text me first and I would just sit there and wait for him to make the move and then at the end of the week, he would freak out on me and say he needs his time and space! We would argue about it for a day or two.. Not talk to each other for a few days.. Then what do you know.. I get a snapchat..

Well I ended up having a miscarriage in August and I didn’t tell him for a couple of weeks bcuz the day I had it, we were fighting and I just could deal with it. So I told him 2 weeks later when we were getting along.

He INSISTED on being there for me.. Told me he loved me and he wanted to be there for me.. Told me not to push him away when I told him not to bother.. He sent me a really nice care package with a super sweet letter restating he loved me and apologizing for being a jerk and sent me a robe with his scent on it..

2 weeks after that, what do you know? He gets after me and tells me I depend on him too much and that he wants his time and space. I was so mad at him that I told him it wasn’t fare and that he needs to figure things out.

So I didn’t talk to him for a week.. Then I decided to text him to ask him when he was coming home and he said he wasn’t sure, it would be confirmed soon. I asked if I could call bcuz I had something’s to apologize for and he said he’d talk to me the next day.

Long story short. He never called me and has been ignoring all of my texts and calls for a week now. I sent him my last message about 3 days ago.. I’m planing on doing NC from here on out..

But what do you think? I’m just so lost right now.

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:26 pm

Hi Megan,

I am glad you took a risk and commented.

I think NC is PERFECT for your situation. You have already conditiioned him to think that you are going to be calling him constantly so by doing the exact opposite he will take notice.
Megan

September 20, 2013 at 10:23 pm

Thank you,

I know it was unattractive that I was calling him and texting him but I’m so upset that he didn’t call when he said he would.. All I was trying to do was apologize.

Is it bad that he’s not talking to me now?.. Do you think I’ve ruined everything?

I just don’t understand why he said he loved me and he was sorry and he didn’t want me to push him away.. And now I’m getting the silent treatment.

Thoughts?..
Megan

October 4, 2013 at 12:21 am

Really? And why is that?

Ps.. I sent you like, a super long email a few hours ago.. Haha!! Please don’t get upset with my venting..

I’m just not used to Martin being this way.
admin

October 4, 2013 at 9:29 pm

I won’t, I haven’t gotten to it yet b/c there was an attack on this site yesterday and I spent the rest of my focus on that. I will try to get to it today though.
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:04 pm

I think you have not ruined everything but at the same time I think you may need to work on controlling your anger about the situation. Yea, I know that is hard to hear but the truth is that you have to be in a calm state to get your boyfriend back.

It’s ok though, look at this time as a way to improve.
Megan

October 3, 2013 at 2:18 am

I just stopped talking to him the other day actually!

I don’t even have the urge to talk to him anymore because he is talking to these two new girls now.
admin

October 4, 2013 at 12:11 am

That is good!

I am happy to hear that. Though some guys talk to other girls to make themselves feel better.
Megan

October 2, 2013 at 3:02 pm

Well, considering he told me he was done “dealing” with me and our relationship and said hes ready to move on.. And the fact that he’s talking to two new girls.. Who are the complete opposite of me (they wear tones of make up and wear nice clothes and take selfies all the time.. Im more of a natural type of girl: a little bit of eyeliner, a little mascara, hair straight or in a side ponytail depending on if Ive got workout class that day, and I ONLY dress up whenever hes around).

I live 1,000 miles away from him now and these girls he is talking to live 10 minutes away from his base..

What do you think I should do?

He untagged himself from practically every picture of me and him (thats 2 1/2 years worth of pictures).. Especially the ones where he had graduations and it was us two together (the happiest days of his life as he used to call them)..

He deleted me off Facebook.. Deleted all of that stuff.. And then readded me..

He added those two new girls and I know he is snap chatting both of them.

Chris, what should I do to get him crawling back to me?

Do you think I even have a chance?

I am seriously ready for whatever you throw at me.

This is seriously the love of my life. I read all of our old love notes, letters, Facebook posts, and look at all of his pictures and I get the same butterflies I had when we were on our first date.

Chris, do I even have a chance anymore?
After everything he has said and done.. Do you think I have any chance at all? 🙁
admin

October 3, 2013 at 1:28 am

Have you done NC? You might want to hit that up pretty darn soon.

And yes I think you have a chance.
Megan

October 1, 2013 at 4:31 am

Well, he is talking to a new girl now that lives near his base.. So I think it’s officially over.

I don’t think he ever loved me.

Thanks though..
admin

October 1, 2013 at 11:59 pm

Well, I am here to help you so any questions you have feel free.
Megan

September 30, 2013 at 12:41 pm

No, however, I feel as if I’ve been pushed to my limit and I feel as if he doesn’t care about the past two years.. Which is discouraging to me.

He said he is tired of our relationship and dealing with it and it’s just best we both move on. He said all the promises he made don’t matter anymore bcuz that was for when we were dating.

It’s like he doesn’t care that I had the miscarriage or that I was sick. He said “none of those things were your fault, except your doctors” and I’m like, well if it’s not my fault, then why are you leaving me?

I’m so mad bcuz a month ago he sent me that care package apologizing for being mean and for pushing me away and that he was happy I haven’t given up on him and that he still loved me, and now today, he treats me like this and tells me he didn’t mean any of the things he said in his letter he wrote..

I feel like he never loved me at all. 🙁
admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:47 am

I don’t know him personally but I do know men in general and though it may seem messed up the way he is acting now I think deep down he loves you.
Megan

September 29, 2013 at 1:18 am

So.. He’s been saying it’s too late for us. It’s too late for us to figure things out.. Does this just mean that I need to give up?

He said we need space.. Then he said it’s too late..

I just don’t know anymore.
admin

September 30, 2013 at 12:32 am

Do you want to give up?
Megan

September 22, 2013 at 12:30 am

Thank you!

That is actually what I needed to hear and I’m realizing that more and more everyday. I’m working on it.. I hope he decides to come around.. However, I’m still going to abide by the 30 day NC rule until then!! So far I’m on day 3 since I’ve sent him my last text!
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:45 pm

You are doing great. It is not going to be an easy trek but you can do it if you remain disciplined!

DZ

September 20, 2013 at 4:44 pm

Hi Chris,

I have been in a long distance relationship for 8 months. The last time I visited him he did break up with me in a huge fight. I was really really upset and begged him to stay with me. After a few days he said he did changed his mind and he wanted to talk to me. But again I did make a mistake by being to needy… In the couple days that followed I did everything to get him back, but this made us fight even more and I think it made him realise that he really don’t want to be with me 🙁 When i got home I went into the NC period. He texted me once in this period. He only said ‘hi’ and I did the wrong thing by texting him back. After the 30 days I texted him and I got a positive/neutral response, a couple days later I texted him again and again he did gave me a positive/neutral response. After that I did make a mistake by asking if he had a new girlfriend ( a saw something on facebook) He did get a little mad and i decided to not talk to him for 15 days.
So I texted him again and again the response was positive/neutral, so I decided to have a longer conversation with him and it seems like a was on the right way.
But a week ago i send him a text and he answered only with: im fine thanks. I tried to get in a conversation with him, but his answers were so short. only like: both. i’m glad etc.
So i said to him that if he is not comfortable talking to me, that i could understand that. No answer.. So today i asked him if he still had negative feelings towards me and he only said: I’m busy.
I really don’t know what to do know. I’m thinking about sending him a text with something like that I have the feeling that things need to be spoken out between us.
What is your advice?

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:25 pm

I think before you do anything a NC rule should be implemented.
dz

September 20, 2013 at 10:27 pm

thank you for your answer. why a nc period is the best things to do? i already did a nc period of 30 days and after that again 15 days. how long should this nc period take? and what can i do after that? I don’t have any hope anymore 🙁
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:07 pm

Ok, so you have already tried the NC period. Have you tried implementing the texts on this page and throughout the E-Book?
DZ

September 22, 2013 at 5:34 pm

And now he did remove me from facebook.. I did nothing wrong?! 🙁
admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:17 pm

Well, the two of you are broken up and some guys think that if you are broken up with someone you have to unfriend them. I did this a lot. BUT I usually add the girl back after some time.
DZ

September 22, 2013 at 9:01 am

Yes i did the NC period after he broke up with me. After that I made a mistake by asking if he had a new girlfriend and i decided to implement a new NC period of 15 days.
I have the ebook from Michael Fiore, but because this page is only for long distance relationships I think this is better for me. I tried a couple of across the bow texts from Michael Fiore, but the response from my ex was always neutral, so i didn’t get to the next phase. ( I must tell you that I did not always end the conversation.. )Now i am thinking of trying the meme. What do you think? Should I do this? Or should I wait a couple of days? Or do you have a better advice?
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:58 pm

Wait a few days before you send it but I think the meme thing is definitely worth a shot!

Nora

September 19, 2013 at 2:41 pm

Sorry this is long.
So my current situation is a little bit different. I currently live in Georgia, but I am from Pennsylvania. I met this guy about a year ago when I flew home for my best friend Marie’s birthday. This guy is actually Marie’s boyfriend’s best friend. We hit it off (nothing physical), but I didn’t think anything of it as I was leaving for Georgia the next morning. And, I found out later that he was in the middle of ending a long relationship at that time. I flew home again in June for a visit, (also deciding that it was time to move home and I was planning on doing so in about a year) and one night I went with Marie to a friend of her boyfriend’s graduation party. The way there Marie mentioned how this guy would be there (along with other people that I would remember from her birthday). He came up to me and we ended up talking for hours. We hung out again with a group of friends the next day and the day before I left to go back to Georgia he called out of work and took me on an all day date. Basically, we both said this was crazy, we never felt a connection like this before, and we had the most amazing time together. He wanted to continue this relationship even though I would be in Georgia for another year. A week after being back in Georgia he bought tickets to fly down and see me and convinced me to get tickets to Washington because our best friends and him were going in September and he wanted me to join them. So for 40 days or so we talked and texted everyday and video chatted almost everyday. He was the one pursuing this the whole time. He would say things like how much he liked me how he wanted to marry me and he told all of his friends and family that I was the one. I was falling hard for him too, but I was a little more realistic and just wanted to see what things would be like when he came to Georgia. We really got to know each other over the 40 days before he came. And his trip to Georgia ended up being the best 5 days of both of our lives. I had gotten tickets to fly home Labor Day weekend to visit him and our best friends. Everything was fine in the few weeks leading up to it, except one week he seemed really moody. I didn’t say anything to him about it. I let it go. He actually ended up texting me, with out any incitation from me, an apology of his moodiness and that he just missed me so much he didn’t know what to do sometimes. Everything was fine after. I flew home Labor Day weekend, but most of the trip he seemed really distant. And I tried to let it go. But then one night I got upset. He never apologized and again I let it go trying to just be happy. He still seemed distant and I admit during that time I was needy just wanting his attention. I also asked a couple of times what was wrong and if he still liked me, which I know I shouldn’t of kept doing. But, in my head I was only there for another day or two and we should talk in person if there was something wrong. He just ignored it even the last day when we were alone. He blew it off then told me nothing was wrong. At the airport he made me believe that everything was fine and we had the Washington trip to look forward too. He even talked about other things we would do in the future. He called me during my layover home and we had a really sweet conversation that made me feel at ease. However, during the few weeks leading up to our Washington trip I started to feel the distance again. So instead of being needy I pulled back a little. I answered when he called had normal conversations texted here and there, but I did have some walls up. Later that week we got in a fight because of something he said that knew made me mad. I didn’t talk to him that night and in the morning he texted me a message said thanks for caring enough to let me know you were home safe nice knowing you. I tried calling he didn’t answer. He said he didn’t want to talk so I said fine. I didn’t talk to him until the next night when he texted me thanks for caring enough to call or text. I said if I call you I annoy you if I don’t then I don’t care. I can’t win. He ended up calling and was still moody but we apologized and he just said the distance was hard and he felt like he was initiating conversations all the time. The rest of the time after was just back and forth. Some of the time he sounded miserable and would just act like a jerk to me. Other times, he would be sweet and act like his normal self. This past week he was super distant. I tried to be light hearted throughout the course of his moods. But, I just got pissed off about it and again didn’t know what to do but pull back. I was, however, the one initiating most conversations. But he would still just get mad about stupid things and act like a jerk. I finally confronted him about it a few days ago. And we had a pretty good conversation. He admitted that something felt different Labor Day weekend but he didn’t know why. He also said he just doesn’t think he can do this (the relationship) anymore and maybe it is just the distance. He still said he cared about me and that he meant everything he ever said to me, that I was the sweetest girl he ever met, but he just felt like something changed. He said we have our trip to look forward too. We’ll see each other then and maybe that will fix things, he just didn’t know. I was very level headed. I did not get upset. I said what will be will be and we’ll have a fun trip no matter what. I thanked him for talking to me. I didn’t call him out on all the ways he hurt me. I just said I pulled back because I felt distance. I told him I care about him too that I never fell for anyone like that before, but if it doesn’t work it doesn’t work. We joked a bit and that was that. Now the past couple days we just text asking how each is doing.

My question is what do I do now? I still want this to work. We have one week until our trip together. How do I act in this week? And what do I do when I see him that will “fix” things so to speak.
Thanks for taking the time to read this. I appreciate it.

Nora

September 21, 2013 at 1:03 am

I honestly am confused myself, but I don’t think we are now.
Nora

October 1, 2013 at 7:44 pm

So we are not together. Ended it over our vacation. He acted like he cared the first two days, then said it’s too hard for him. Other problems occurred, but in the end he said he thinks we are better as friends. Then i saw him texting his ex. He doesn’t know that I saw. I didn’t confront him about it. Last night when I got home he asked if I was home safe. I said yes asked him, and kept the conversation short. Today he texted me asking how I was feeling. I didn’t respond. Then he texted an hour later “good I’m glad to hear it”. I didn’t respond.

Should I continue with this NC rule?
What about him talking to his ex?

Another problem is I will see him in two weeks when I fly home for my best friends birthday :/

What do I do?
admin

October 2, 2013 at 1:03 am

Continue with NC and don’t let the ex phase you.
Nora

October 2, 2013 at 3:25 pm

Thank you. What do I do when I see him in two weeks?
admin

September 20, 2013 at 7:00 pm

Ok, I have a question first.

I am a little confused. Are you two still together?

Claudia

September 17, 2013 at 4:38 pm

My LDR boyfriend and I were together for 7 months. We were doing long distance for 4 months now. He broke up with me 2 days ago cause I told him that I was upset that he didn’t call me the night before. He even said that he doesn’t love me and he didn’t mean the sweet things he told me in the past. (I don’t know if he just said this cause I made him mad by telling him that he upset me) The day before that, I have just told him that I’ve saved enough money to buy a plane ticket going to him and he was really excited and we started planning things together. I intend to stay for a few months where he is. Anyway, I dont know why the sudden change of heart. i still haven’t heard from him. Day 1 of breaking up, I blew up his phone with messages and calls but he never responded. Day 2, I limited to contacting him to 4 messages and a long email saying that our relationship is important to me and I want us to fix it.

This is the second time he broke up with me over something really little. The first time was 3 months ago when I simply asked him why we have no profile picture together on Facebook when he has his past girls on there. We got back together before the day ended then.

Anyway, I don’t know what to do anymore. I think I’ve tried every possible way to reach him: Facebook, viber, texts, calls. And I don’t get any replies.

I hope you can help me out because I’m getting so sad and I really want to fix the relationship.

admin

September 18, 2013 at 3:04 am

I would stop calling him and everything right away. I would do the NC rule.
Claudia

September 18, 2013 at 4:18 am

Oh alright. Ill start today. I also wanna add that before he hung up on me when we broke up, I told him that I haven’t had my period since I left the country where he is. That it’s his if ever. He told me that he wants nothing to do with it.

And should I postpone my trip to him?
admin

September 19, 2013 at 1:44 am

What a jerk. He wants nothing to do with his own child (assuming you are pregnant?)

Why do you want this guy back exactly?
Claudia

September 23, 2013 at 12:01 am

Should I still buy a ticket going to him even if he’s ignoring me?
admin

September 24, 2013 at 2:04 am

No, I wouldn’t buy a ticket unless I was sure he would want to see you.
Claudia

September 20, 2013 at 11:38 pm

Okay, so I broke NC yesterday and Left him a text message that I took a pregnancy test already. He didnt even reply to ask what the result is. 🙁
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:06 pm

Wow, what a jerk. Sometimes I can’t believe the way some guys act.

Don’t overreact. He will be interested in the result I am betting maybe not this instant but he will be interested.
Claudia

September 19, 2013 at 8:10 pm

He blocked me but he’s still Facebook friends with my siblings. I was halfway day 1 of NC and this is what happens 🙁 am I doing it right?

And do you think he’s ignoring me and reacting this way cause of the breakup or cause I told him I might be pregnant?
admin

September 20, 2013 at 8:51 pm

You are. Don’t fold yet haha.

You will refriend him after NC.
Claudia

September 19, 2013 at 6:36 am

Chris! He just blocked me on Facebook. I don’t know what to do anymore. :(( I still want him cause I love him and he’s important to me. Help me 🙁
admin

September 19, 2013 at 7:12 pm

Don’t freak out. You will get Facebook back in the future.

Nj

September 16, 2013 at 4:06 pm

Hello Chris:
First of all, really thank you for providing such a help site for all the girls like us, this is the kind of help I need right now :).
Me and my ex been together for 6 month, then he move to Vietnam at mid of July because of his job, we used to be very good to be together, everything was so fine, we companied each other a lot, we always felt happy together, and he said he like being with me, he always feel happy to be with me, and I love him so much, we talked before he went to Vietnam, I want to keep the LDR, but he said he’s not sure about it, let’s see how things happens. Ever since he’s gone, I miss him like crazy, I send him many text every day, but he did not reply so often as he used to be here with me, I am not sure if he wants to drain me dry or because he’s really busy. not until Aug22 I sent him text again to tell him I want to visit him at September, then he replied he didn’t think it’s a good idea for me to coming over Viet man, he wants to keep good memory between us ,not ruining it by force something, he seemed that he doesn’t believe in LDR ,because he said he tried with his ex GF before which was two years ago, after broke with his ex,he hadn’t had any girl friend for one and half year, not until the late half year, he met me, we were so perfect to be each other, and his very sweet to me ,he even was my first.
After I saw his text, my heart was broken, I cried every day ,I missed him so much, always remember those happy time we used to be together, but I still texted him back pretended I am ok with that and said let’s be friend and wish him all the best. He didn’t reply me immediately. Since then my text to him become less, and I don’t expect him reply to me as often as before. cause I am telling myself I am not his girlfriend now, I shouldn’t keep text him too much, I am so afraid to annoying him, I’d rather to stay friend with him than lost him forever, god I love him so much, heaven knows ,how I wish I could get back to be with him again. Strange things happened, after less contact, it’s almost NC for 2 weeks, I sent his text again on last Sunday, this time he relied immediately, and even talked with me more through text, I didn’t foresee that at all, he asked how am I right now, and told me his life right now is pretty much work and sleep, he works in an international school, very busy with teaching. The moment we started to talk, the feeling are coming back again, but we talk most about the light and funny things, not the emotional text.
I was so happy that he talked to me much through text, but I still play cool and friendly with it, cause I don’t know what is his really meaning by doing that? In the next week till yesterday, his text to me is even more than we “broke up” after he got Vietnam, if it’s literally is a break up, cause we never say it confront.
Chris, is that a good sign? What does he mean? I really wanna win him back, should I keep the speed up to text him or start the NC process for 30days? Really thank you for your advises! I appreciate that!

Bsrgs!
Nj

Nj

October 24, 2013 at 5:38 pm

Please ignore the previous one, its not complete, sorry!
Hi Chris,really glad to see you update some new articles which always be so helpful and guided ,thank you for doing that! And i want update the my situation with my ex ,just hope can receive your “diagnosis”, which i see Will be very valuable advice to me:).So i changed the content of bring good memory from lost wallet to his favorite good, and this time he did answered excitedly,so we continue text more often, i want to text him everyday to be honest, but sad things is i am not very good at end the conversation first,so its always like i text one sentence, he suddenly gone, no reply. Will get reply to me the next day. Or after two days.thus i cant text him everyday, cause i was waiting for his reply text. And i dont wanna be a text gnat, so i try to control my text times to him, i went to visit England for two weeks at the beginning of October, we even kept contact during my staying in UK,hes at Vietnam, so we have like 7hours time difference, i told him whats going on at UK, he always reply to me next day, once we even chat for while, he told me he just off work and ready for a foot massage while i just got up. I told him the most dangerous thing i ve ever met was chased my cow,while he laugh a lot and said it seemed so funny to him since he is raised on a farm as well. He even sent more text one time to tell me he want buy a motorcycles.i sent him my PICs and he sent me his PIC on his birthday, we just keep this speed to catch up, once i text him that i got little gift for him from UK and can post to him when i back to home if he would tell me his address, he didnt reply that regard that and i didnt pursue further, cause i know hes kind person hate to be pushed, now i am back home.Chris, do you think i am on the right track to win him back? He told me about situation at school, sometimes tell me whats his up to do,but i never dare to ask if he is seeing someone, i gut tells me he is not:-P,while i hope it is true! Do you think i should try to ask him again about the gift? And try to end the text first next time when we text. Cause our last text was ended at yesterday when he told me about school,i asked if school work is strict, he suddenly stop and havent answer yet(he always like that, so next time he can continue our conversation to answer it o>_<o).sorry, if its be too long, i really appreciate you any advice ,thanks!
admin

October 24, 2013 at 8:21 pm

I do think you should ask him again about the gift.
Nj

October 28, 2013 at 12:47 am

Yes, i Will wait 3days to text him again, if can get him back, i think id rather wait forever:),thanks Chris!
Nj

October 27, 2013 at 11:06 am

Hello Chris, hope you are doing well today! Thing is we chatted a while through text yesterday afternoon and all went well,i felt we were building the rapport, at last i showed him the PIC of the gifts , and asked him if he like them at first ,(they are one pair of tiger socks,tiger printed in a cool and cute way ,and a Wales dragon book mark),he replied its neat and said its actually feel strange to see a western dragon since he saw Asian dragon over the past six years.hes Canadian. Then i replied” this is the little gifts to you if you like it”, then he just suddenly stop like before,not reply till now. I was upsetting , i though at least he can tell he if he doesnt like it,i am OK with that. i dont know what to do next, i really want to send him more text,but i keep telling myself dont be a text gnat and need think logically, i think i better consult you before my next move, what do you think, Chris? what should i do next? Really appreciate your advices !
Sorry if id been bother you for everytime asking advice from you , just visiting this site has been part of my life recently which give me strength and Confidence,thank you!
Bsrgs!
Nj
admin

October 27, 2013 at 10:48 pm

No it’s ok that is what I am here for!

Wait 2-3 days before texting him again. Are you ok with that?
Nj

November 1, 2013 at 7:38 am

Hi, Chris, first wish you had a very happy Hallowee:)!
yes, I texted him two days later mentioned something else , he did reply,he even said sorry to me for he didnt reply me instant cause he was out and no wifi on his phone which is the first time he says sorry for late reply my text. cause We are at two different countries, So We text each other use Wechat, I guess he doesnt like the gifts, So he just drained that dry, whatever ,I triedo>_<o
Thing is now his action really confused me, I mean one day he can text me a lot,reply my each text. I can feel the connection between us,for one day, he just totally no response at all, We ended text on Tuesday, and I waited till yesterday to text him about happy Halloween! And he didnt reply till now, I really dont get it,whats going on his mind,Chris,do you think I still get a chance to win him back?
Bsrgs!
Nj
admin

November 1, 2013 at 6:45 pm

Maybe he was just so busy he finally got back to you. Do you have any idea if he was really busy yesterday.
Nj

November 7, 2013 at 3:16 am

Hi, Chris, its me again, ex at Vietnam girl, hope you are doing fine:).I just read your new post,Cant believe been feel depressed for a while because of my ex and finally its your article about whats male mind during NC made me relief and smiled,in particular the part you describ girls mind why to fail Nc which is directly come to the point :-P,I bet you can be any girlsbest Guy friend, haha.
Thing is, I texted ex again after two days of Halloween which was on Saturday , this time he replied soon ,engaged the conversation a lot, and replied me about Halloween, show me pic of his dress up, We continued the text for almost two weekend holidays, at Saturday, I finish conversation first while he told me he gonna out for dinner to eat rice, Sunday We start text late and stopped before sleep,and Monday morning, he still texted me back about some movie,and I ended first too, then at Tuesday, I texted him like this “I caught up supernatural episode 4 last night, which remind me the movie OZ the great and powerful ‘We used to watch together “trying to bring back some good memory, but he just didnt respond again, I waited two days. Until today, I sent a meme PIC, he replied soon, laughte a lot and told me today school is cancelled because of typhoon at Vietnam, then I ask is typhoon very strong there? As usual, he just suddenly stoppedT^T,I dont like that, I started to know what you mean by need to be very patient to get exboyfriend even during in contact period, its just so hard, really hard. But deep down my heart, I know I love him.
So whats your insight of his behavior? I think he can category stubborn for NC reaction,really need your advices ,thanks!
Bsrg!
Nj
admin

November 7, 2013 at 5:59 pm

Hahaha thanks for the kind words.

Definitely stubbron guy without a doubt.
Nj

November 8, 2013 at 5:02 pm

hi Chris, how can I motivate this stubborn ex more?:(,yesterday later he replied me and We again text for certain time which was good, and today We continued too, it just I still feel like hes kinda clueless right now, he could stop at any next minute while sometimes hes so engaged to our conversation, the aftertaste from his side I think is quite good, We never quarrel,fight, it was just sweet.
what should I do next? Appreciate your advices!
PS:generally,I feel our relationship is getting better, its just so slow, like five steps ahead, then two steps backwards
have a nice weekend!
Bsrgs!
Nj
admin

November 8, 2013 at 7:16 pm

Well it is going to be slow that is just something you will have to deal with.

I think you are doing everything the right way just keep working your magic. Be patient.
Nj

November 2, 2013 at 6:13 am

yes, he mentioned he was busy for prepare school’s next week assembly before ,I think I would try to text him again after two days, thanks Chris!
Bsrgs!
Nj
Nj

October 25, 2013 at 9:06 am

Hi Chris, knowing you dont feel well over this week from this site, really thank you still answer my commments, i will try to ask him about the gift again and get back to you! thanks! take care!

bsrgs!
nj
admin

October 26, 2013 at 5:18 pm

Yea it has been a tough week :(.
admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:31 am

I am a little confused here. Are you saying you don’t know if you are broken up or not?

If you are then NC is the way to go.
Nj

September 17, 2013 at 2:12 am

really thank for your reply, i mean i think it’s a break up, even none of us confront to say it out, it’s just he didnt think i go to visit him at Vietman is a good idea, and i told him let us stay friend.
admin

September 18, 2013 at 2:47 am

I guess we can proceed like you two are broken up first step is to implement the NC rule!
Nj

September 29, 2013 at 2:04 pm

Thanks Chris:)，he replied to me yesterday, i feel the connection between us when we conversation on text is better than previous , but still, i find its difficult to spice it up, i mean i think we are still in positive, neutral talk,regard those meme and check up on each other like friend, and IT seemed IT depends on his mood to answer my text more or less, i just dont know how to cut it to remember the old times naturally, i never text anything like that before, i am thinking about one text about remember the old times”i just pass this friendship hotel, do you remember how soon you get your lost wallet back? You were really lucky at that time! “What do you think, Chris? Is that a good text to hook him to remember the old times? I am really nervous, i Will be more awkward if he doesnt response this text
admin

October 1, 2013 at 1:38 am

No I am actually not a fan of that one. Because you are reminding him of when he lost his wallet and that isn’t really a “good time” in my opinion.
Nj

September 27, 2013 at 7:06 am

Hello Chris:
My ex did response to be after a short NC,and he also responesed to my meme to him, but later he turned out be cold again, i mean not answer my text so actively,i sent him text on Sunday, and till now haven’t got any response. what should i do? really appreciated your advices!
nj
admin

September 28, 2013 at 2:48 am

Step away for a week before you reach out again. You need to hook him in a conversation. When he wasn’t responsive were your texts up to par?
Nj

September 19, 2013 at 5:50 am

thanks Chris,will keep you posted, your site really helps me a lot!

Tash

September 16, 2013 at 3:07 pm

Hey I’ll keep this brief as you get lots of comments.
Just mutually broke up with my LDR bf because he doesn’t have enough time for me due to his university course (studying to be a doctor). He said he still loves me and he wants to stay friends and get together in the future if we are still single. Will the no contact rule push him away or will it boost the chances of a future relationship? He did say he still wanted to talk or he’d miss me more but I don’t know if that will ruin the chances.

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:21 am

I am going to have to say it will increase your chances of getting him back.

Cindy

September 15, 2013 at 5:54 pm

I see you made a shedule on how things evolves in when he start missing you. We used to have contact multiple days a day with texting.

But he is a possible rebound relation now, does it still kinda works the same. Or is there a bigger chance that he doesnt miss me at all

admin

September 16, 2013 at 5:00 am

I actually wrote an article on rebound relationships so you might also want to check that out.

Kirstin

September 14, 2013 at 2:36 am

Hi Chris
First of all, thank you for having this site for ones like me in despair. I’m grateful you care enough about the feelings of hurt females to do this.
I met a guy online dating, we met after a few months (LDR) and had a great time for 3 months, both taking the turns to do the 3 hour drive.
We had a really silly minor argument and I ended up making it worse by not being able to express my feelings, so it was a difficult last few hours that we had before he left. I spent the next couple of weeks trying hard to text like we normally did but he wasn’t responding the same. I took the step I needed to and text him that I couldn’t date him anymore, the last two weeks I tried to repair my mistake and clearly made more. He text back that he agreed, he couldn’t get past the difficult time of our last meet up.
That was it. 30 days of NC, with him liking a couple of fbook pics I put up about two weeks in. He broke the ice on fbook chat on day 30 asking about the weather here. I responded nicely and left it at that. 2 days later I text that I had a book for him and would send it, he was happy with that and told me he was moving, 4 x further away. I’m gutted. I thought there may have been a chance for us to get back together, but it seems it’s just got harder, not easier for that chance.
I got a nice thank you text when he received the book.
Today I was on fbook chat, and he asked what was happening, but yet isn’t forthcoming with information. It seems he likes to make the connection, just to be sure we’re still good – as far as friends go. I ask the questions about moving etc and he does answer but not in detail. He’s not asking about me either, so I’m really getting the feeling he can’t wait to start his new adventure, and I’m only going to be the distant memory. Despite the fact that we made some awesome memories in our short time together.
What is your view on this? Do you think he wanted to break it off with me and the argument was the perfect disguise? Or just that he views LDR now as a deal breaker when he once was ok with it?

admin

September 15, 2013 at 1:17 am

Him saying that his views of a LDR are a deal breakers is total B.S. in my opinion. I mean, all of a sudden he changes?

I think it is more of the argument is the perfect disguse type of deal.
Kirstin

September 15, 2013 at 6:50 am

I’m seeing more what you mean…love knows nothing about distance.
So in your opinion, what chance do I have to rekindle what we had? If I have a chance I’m prepared to work for it using your methods that make sense. If there’s no chance, I don’t want to waste my time or his. As a few friends have pointed out, he has a few things going on his mind right now, the upcoming shift etc – I will not be on his mind the same as if he was staying put. My worry is that while both of us, according to the stats, have been thinking about each other post break-up, is it still too late in the next month or two? Once he’s settled elsewhere? I guess you can’t put a time limit on when you stop thinking about your ex too much.
admin

September 16, 2013 at 3:57 am

I think you should give it a shot ONLY if you think that you have a future with this person.

Do you see a future with this person?
Kirstin

September 22, 2013 at 2:08 am

I have pretty much devoured your whole website. The complexities of the sexes! But I thank you for all this information. Knowledgement is empowerment and on that note I’ve decided I want to have this man in my life. Yes, I have always seen a future with him and now I need to take some notes and see how I go. If anything this site provides, it’s tips to not go and do some silly things that can jeopardise the chances of getting back together.
Thank you Chris. One day I hope to be back on here with great news.
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:49 pm

Have you devoured the success section? That is kind of fun to look at because it really shows that these tactics can work if you stick to them.

Jane

September 12, 2013 at 6:20 am

Hi! I and my boyfriend are in an LDR relationship for two years now. Last month we got into a fight and he started acting cold afterwards until our 2nd anniversary. I asked him if he was coming home to celebrate with me. But he didn’t come to see me. He said he wasn’t sure about his feelings anymore. I begged him to try to make the relationship work out. I pleaded and gave him a condition. I said I didn’t want to break up. That we continue the relationship for two months and after two months that he hasn’t changed his mind, I said I will let him go. A week after I laid the condition, I visited him. But he was still very cold. 2 days after, I went home and it seemed like he only agreed to meet me out of pity. I was always the one initiating out text conversation. 3 days after I got home, I tried the NC to confuse him. I wanted to show him I don’t care anymore. But I missed him so much so I texted him 3 days after and said I wanted to talk to him on the phone so he called me. I told him, I’m starting to get tired chasing him and want to discontinue the relationship. He was waiting for me to say that I now agree with the break up. But I still didn’t say it. 4 days ago, I told him I won’t be able to keep in touch with him because I’ll be busy. But I actually wanted to do the NC and told him I won’t be able to text him just to be polite. It’s been 4 days now that I’m doing the NC. And he still hasn’t contacted me yet. Is there hope in my situation?

admin

September 13, 2013 at 3:38 am

It is still really really early in NC. And yes there is hope.
Jane

September 13, 2013 at 4:00 am

Hi Chris! Thank you for your response. I appreciate it a lot. But my situation’s a bit different because we’re still together. And what I’m trying to do is to be able to save the relationship before the 2-month condition ends. I’m wondering if NC is applicable to my situation. Or should I agree first to the break-up before I do this? I hope you have an article that talks about saving a dying relationship.
admin

September 13, 2013 at 6:04 pm

I don’t think it is in your case. Well, let me rephrase that. I don’t think a full NC is applicable. I think limited contact is the way to go in your case.
Jane

September 13, 2013 at 11:50 pm

Does limited contact mean I have to wait for him to text me first and I would reply but shouldn’t the next time? Or should I initiate the conversation then leave him hanging?
admin

September 15, 2013 at 1:06 am

Limited contact means you can only talk to him if he sends you a text first or if you pass the 30 day mark (whichever comes first.)

siew

September 11, 2013 at 1:51 am

Hi Chris,
thank you for this site… i hope you can help me…I am very confused and hurt…
two years ago i hooked up with my high school sweet heart, whom I never forgot. We broke up because I was feisty, jealous and didnt know how to communicate with him. He was ready to get a divorce until he found out his wife had colon cancer. I was in the beginnings of my divorce. My husband was abusive. Anyway it is a long distance relationship LDR. we both live in the same state. He told me through the years, he remembered me too. Well, he has been with me , giving me support, financially, emotionally, we talked every nite, text everyday. He knows how much i love him.. I have told him that I will and has always love him. and he knows this. I also helped his wife get connected with one of our top liver surgeon for her surgery. It wasnt till this may that i moved out of the primary residence, I felt that he was kind of distant toward the end of July. We havent been intimate since beginning of July. Mid august, he offered to paint my car and install a dvd system to my new van. so that I can save the money from insurance He wasnt able to do the paint job well, so he paid it . He also paid for the dvd system.
this school year, my girls are living with me on a full time basis. I knew that we needed to make an effort to spend time together in order to keep the relationship.. and I told him that next to my girls, my relationship with him as the most important thing to me. We didnt make any strategic plans for long term as how we were to get together. we did make plans to see each other on last week of august.. to spend the nite .. together, during dinner i noticed that he was distant.. and almost look as if alone. later that nite he took a shower and forgot his phone in the bathroom… as I was in the bathroom, he knocked on the door and ask if i was ok? and if i saw his phone. You said that a man will breakup from a long distance relationship because he needs sex. probabily someone closer. I jsut felt like he was distant… i have no proof.
two weeks ago on thursday, i text him and said good morning sunshine, he text me back… “have a nice day in class”… he knows i dont go to school. I responded back, are you in class … and didnt hear from him till 240 that afternoon.. That day and the following day till 7pm I ignored him then that nite, I finally talked to him and i questioned him as to whom that text was meant for, He said it was for me.. he text … Have a good day, in class… he said he was rushing and he was in class. Anyway, the argument escalated , he wanted to get his point across and i was asking why the delay in response back.. anyway he hung up .. i tried to call him immediately , he didnt answer, so i wrote him a poem.. about how every moment i miss him and please forgive me and that i love him. ( this is not the first time that this happened.. where i am thinking he is cheating on me and we end up arguing. … I have no proof. Well, last friday, i tried to call him and of course no answer, last saturday, I had a conference near his area, so i decided to pay a surprise visit, I wanted to know if it was over, and for him to meet up with me and tell me face to face… it was over.. to give me closure, I waited and waited for him. I text him twice telling him where i was and for him to meet me. that i was nervous and shaking. I didnt hear from him.. Nothing. I text another time saying that I hope that one day he will forgive me and give me another chance,.. and that i will always love him. If he has a girlfriend, is it a rebound relationship. or is this a girl that he has been seeing since mid august. Did he start looking because he sees no hope in us… since I have the girls full time and the relatiohship is long distance and we are both somewhat restricted.. to get together. So he thought it was best to breakup.. I still dont have any proof.. I really really love him… and unfortunately told him that… now there is no chase… what should i do?? to get him back. Chris, please write back.

admin

September 12, 2013 at 3:02 am

Hi There!

Well, you need to recreate the chase. Have you implemented a 30 day NC rule yet?

You might also want to check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO as you can get detailed step by step ideas there.
siew

September 17, 2013 at 5:33 pm

yes, i am in my 10th day… nc… last time we broke up… 6 weeks later he contact an wish me a happy birthday.. i had nc. till 2 weeks later.. making the connection after 8 weeks of breaking up. christ… he is hard core… I know my jealousy and trust has always been an issue… I dont know how to be creative in getting him back… I really miss him… He was my only support in helping me with advice about my life…. more than my family was. .. like my best friend.. I am at a lost without him..anyway… I think this time he is serious and the relationship may over. HELP
admin

September 18, 2013 at 3:04 am

Ok, first off there is an issue.

I think you are relying too much on him right now and while that is maybe something he liked when you were together it is a problem in trying to get him back.

You are doing the smart thing in NC it is still very early. What are you doing to evolve?
siew

September 19, 2013 at 3:14 am

studying for my gre… trying to get into school.. working, getting healthy, reading, trying to stay busy… and take care of my girls… do you think we will get back together in the future… even if it means a few years from now?
admin

September 19, 2013 at 7:07 pm

I can’t guarantee you anything. However, if you play your cards right you can improve your chances.

Anna

September 10, 2013 at 10:43 pm

So I’ve been following your steps and we facetimed Sunday night for the first time. We didn’t have a conversation about our relationship, however, it was just a low key fun 15 minute conversation that I ended saying I needed to go to bed. He posted on FB that evening saying he was going to sleep good after that phone call. Then he didn’t text all day Monday or today. What gives? I want to be the one to initiate contact but did I miss up not communicating about our relationship status? Now am I stuck in the dreaded ‘friend zone’? lol

admin

September 11, 2013 at 2:40 am

No, just realize this isn’t going to happen overnight. I think actually you are doing everything good just if he seems to be pushing away don’t chase him. Let some time go by before you contact him again.

Janae

September 10, 2013 at 10:27 pm

So, my boyfriend and I dated for two years, and the majority of our relationship we lived in the same town and got to see eachother pretty much everyday. In Feburary, I ended up moving about 3 hours away, but we still talked on the phone, skyped, and played Xbox live everyday. We also got to see eachother in person once a month, he’d usually stay for the weekend. It was his senior year though, and he was working hard trying to get all that he needed to get done for his schooling, so time for me was becoming scarce. I felt like he was pulling away, so we ended up fighting about this a lot. In May, about two weeks after our 2 year anniversary, he told me that he couldnt do this anymore. At first, it was just a break, but it ended up resulting in a breakup about a week later. We didn’t talk for two weeks because I went to visit family in a different state to get my mind off things. When I got back I wrote him a message and he wrote me one back saying that one day we’d get back together, that with the connection we had things would never really be over between us. I had mixed emotions about this. Had no clue when “someday” would be. I however was very hopeful at this. Our relationship was really amazing, he was my first time, and I was his. I was also his first kiss. We were very much in love before and had many plans for our future. He always used to talk about marriage someday. Anyways, after getting that text, we would text eachother from time to time. He was probably the sweetest person I’ve ever met, considering how gently he tried to let me down. At first he really still did want a future for us someday, but then we had an arguement, and I ended up saying that he either wanted me now or he couldn’t have me. He said he did want me now, but he couldn’t take me at this time. I was confused. I told him to make up his mind (I still regret this conversation to this day) he said I guess the past is just the past then. After that night, I instantly regretted giving an ultimatium to a person I wasn’t even with anymore. I texted him for days after, begging him to forgive me. He was kind enough to write back sometimes, but he had stopped saying “someday we’ll get back together.” It broke my heart whenever he didn’t respond to me. Whenever I was going through a really tough time due to family issues however, if I needed him he’d always respond. He’d end his texts with “love always” or “smile beautiful”. (Honestly, this guy is the most amazing person I’ve ever met) I really wanted to have him back. Obviously telling him he could back anytime wasn’t working. So, I tried the 30 day no contact. I was having very difficult time. After 9 days, I caved and wrote him a long message. I hated myself for being so weak. He didn’t text me back until two days later. I wrote him another message the next day, telling him I’d always love him and care for him. Then I started the 30 day no contact over again. I’m doing very well this time 😀 On day 9 THIS time, HE wrote me 🙂 I didn’t respond though. It wasn’t like what he wrote was very responadable anyway, “Stay up, Love T” I was SO tempted to write him. Like crazy. I was shocked that he actually wrote. But I kept strong. I’m on day 12 now, and still have the urge to write him, but it’s getting less strong with each day 🙂 I’m really hoping this works (and that it isn’t hurting him in the process) because we had a good thing. The one problem I am worried about is other girls. He is free now, I understand that, I know he’s bound to flirt around. There’s just this one girl who I think he might be interested in. So I’m a little worried he’s already forgetting me. It’s been almost 4 months since we’ve broke up, but for 3 of those months we were in contact, and now that I’m doing the 30 day no contact, I’m a little worried it might backfire. I have mixed emotions. I have however been trying to improve myself 🙂 I think about where we went wrong in the relationship: pretty much jealousy which caused the fights and lack of trust. When he met me I was pretty carefree and kind to EVERYBODY. I started to lose my carefree-ness along the way, but I’m starting to find myself again 🙂 Also I have been working out and I admit I look quite improved haha. To be honest I do have guys after me, a few have asked me out, but honestly, none of them give me a special feeling whatsoever. Me and my ex just had that special bond, he understood me better than anyone ever could, we had so much in common, and we were constantly affectionante with eachother. My family however were upset when they found out about the breakup. They chose to hate him. Which hurts me because they loved him before, he used to stay at my house all the time. They were like his second family just like his parents were like my second family. His grandma even used to kiss and hug me just like she did to him and say I love you to both of us. His mom and I were also bonded as well, we used to go shopping together and whenever Christmas rolled around, my ex and I decorated his house together. Basically, we were very close and in love. So were our families. I hope I can keep staying strong until the 30 days are up, I just keep getting so nervous about the turnout! Any advice? 🙂

admin

September 11, 2013 at 2:43 am

Haha you sound like you are doing great to me.

If you need someone to talk to during the 30 days I can be helpful.

Oh, and you might also want to check out Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.
Janae

September 12, 2013 at 7:14 am

Thank you sooo much for replying! 🙂 I’m really enjoying this site actually, it’s a big help.
admin

September 13, 2013 at 3:42 am

Absolutely I will reply!

Glad you are enjoying the site. I make it for people like you 🙂
Janae

September 20, 2013 at 7:21 am

I just wanted to say this is really helping me 🙂 It really seems to get easier with each day that passes. Before I found this site I was really down and depressed and felt hopeless. I’m on day 23 now (Im pretty sure) and at this point, I feel confident that this will work, but doing what you suggested not only does it give me hope, but it’s made me realize that even if things don’t work out, I’ll still be fine. Before I felt it would be the end of the world, now I know there’s other options out there if this doesn’t turn out. I can never thank you enough for how much progress I’ve gotten already 😀 It gets hard sometimes, but like said, it’s easier everyday. I’m still nervous for that first contact coming up soon, but I know everything will turn out okay either way 🙂 I’ll keep you posted!
admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:10 pm

Well I am glad that I have created a “safe place” for you to come and feel better about.

Have you read my E-Book? I recommend doing so if you want more of that “safe place” feeling.
Janae

September 14, 2013 at 8:44 am

So, bad news :/ I’m still strong on no contact, however he just put up a bunch of pictures of him with other girls. My friends, actually. I was quite surprised. Those particular friends had stopped talking me to me after the breakup. Is this normal? I mean they aren’t really doing anything in the picture, but he’s been posting a lot of pics of him with other girls and it’s sort of getting to me to be honest 🙁 I can’t tell if he’s just doing it to get my attention/jealousy or not?
admin

September 15, 2013 at 1:28 am

Yes, usually after a breakup is when you find out who your true friends are.

Try not to let it get to you (I know it is hard believe me.)

Keisha

September 10, 2013 at 11:38 am

Hi Chris! Ok since my long distance on again of again boyfriend broke up with me (He pulled the I’m not ready for a serious relationship card) Ihave have turned into a major texting gnat…and a mean one.I didn’t know about this site and I did all the wrong things.I Did something truly horrible…the emotional letter…we have Stayed in contact (well mostly me calling with no answer texting and messaging with no real reply. We even went on a date and we we talked and joked…he even kissed me at the end of the night. I thought everything was good until the next day when he said he still isn’t isn’t 100 percent he wants to be with me and and again I turned in into the texting gnat,with no replies and the caller with no answer. Chris I’m totally not this girl,but it’s just something so freaking magnetic about this guy I want him so bad. I want to be the cool hot carefree girl he fell in love with,but it’s like he isn’t that interested anymore. Is there any hope for me at the end of the crazy tunnel lol? And before you pump tell me to try your e-book,I already have it,now I need your personal advice and or opinion.

admin

September 11, 2013 at 2:04 am

Hahahaha before I pump the E-Book.

Hey btw have you seen my E-Book?

Hahaha, well how long have you been in NC? I do have a post coming out that will have some new tactics to making him fall for you again. So, if you wait a couple of days you can hit on that.

I think there is hope for you at the end of the tunnel for sure though.
Keisha

September 11, 2013 at 4:09 pm

Chris, Chris, Chriiiis try to keep up lol. I haven’t even started the no contact it feels impossible…every time I try it’s like a gravitational pull pulling my hand towards the phone. But he’s being totally bipolar and hard to read. Sometimes he’ll call and call and message me sweet things theeeen he’ll be so mean. Like now, why do you think there’s hope when he keeps being such a butt-face? Seeeee he’s driving me crazy I’m 22 and I just said butt-face. HELP!!!
admin

September 12, 2013 at 3:32 am

Sorry for not keeping up :(.

But then again if you switched places with me you would understand why sometimes stories blend together.

I have a post coming out tomorrow that may interest you.

Jackie

September 9, 2013 at 11:08 pm

Hi Chris… I completed the 30 day NC rule he texted me week 3 and i never replyed. then on day 32 i text him like the same text u have put up and i never got a reply from him. I was just wondering what my next move should be?

admin

September 11, 2013 at 1:29 am

Wait a week and text him again.

DO NOT use my texts word for word though. They need to be personal to you and him and you have to put some thought behind it.

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