I Want My Ex Back But He Wont Even Talk To Me

402 thoughts on “I Want My Ex Back But He Won’t Talk To Me”

hannah

March 2, 2020 at 4:35 am

hi my ex and i were together for four months and we broke up at the beginning of september we’re college students so we had a class together things were originally fine after the breakup but a month later we were fighting really badly and by mid-november he said he didn’t want to be friends or talk at all anymore

i reached out in february about a personal thing and he responded in a sweet but generic way and then a week later when i reached out again no response before i got the no response i had a gut feeling things would turn out okay between us and i kept getting all these signs like running into him on valentines day and in general just running into him when i hadn’t seen him in months its a big campus and i often go months without seeing my friends unless i specifically make plans with them so idk why i’m running into him so often if its not some kind of sign..

but also i feel like i’ve reached out enough and i’m sort of tired and annoyed doing that and not getting a response and i dont wanna do that again bc i feel like not responding just gives him more power… but i dont really know how to get him to contact me? not to sound annoying but there’s not really more i can do to be UG? my grades are good, my social life is good, my body is the ideal body type, i am pretty happy with my life, i joined some new clubs, etc etc the only thing i can think of is that since its winter and hella cold i cant dress as cute as a i normally do? but thats sort of out of my control

i want him back in my life again first just as friends and then maybe as more but i can not for the live of god figure out how to bridge that gap between us

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

March 12, 2020 at 10:10 pm

Hi Hannah so if you want him back as a friend, then you need to just give it some time where you focus on yourself and start dating casually to show that you are moving on. If you want him back as a boyfriend then I recommend that you start following the process so that you can become Ungettable.

Marie

February 23, 2020 at 11:53 pm

So my husband of 10 years 15 total started traveling for work… in the past we have had problems with my trust issues because of his cheating… well this time is no different… I made a Secret Facebook with me blocked and I found it and he is friends with the ex that will hate … he made a Snapchat added me and I caught Him talking to that ex… he admitted it and said he is not sure if he wants to be with her again… they were doing rigs together for a few months and that was the extent of their relationship over the last 8 years… anyways he still talks to me randomly when he wants…. and I have no idea where our marriage is right now… he refuses to break it off completely and he also will not be clear with me if he wants to work on it or now. I’m just really confused as what to do here… please help

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 26, 2020 at 11:06 pm

Hi Marie, so I would suggest that you at this point give him an ultimatum to choose you or lose you. As you living in limbo is not fair. If he says to end the marriage then you go into a No contact and do not reply to any of his attempts to speak to you again unless he says he made a mistake and wants you back and agrees to stop speaking to the other woman.

Lindsay

February 15, 2020 at 1:52 pm

I need advice please! My ex and I were together for just over 2 years we broke up in Dec 2019. We planned a life together as in us taking our kids and immigrating to New Zealand. He has kids from his marriage and I had kids from a previous relationship. Everything was good our kids got along every well. Then in November he took his kids to the movies I was aware of that but he felt the need not to tell me the ex wife went with. I found out a week later and was hurt and angry. Bare I mind I came out of a 10 year abusive relationship where my kids father cheated on me for 6 of the 10 years. His ex-wife has also always scheme and plotted to break us up. So he know how I feel about her. So when I found out he went with and he didn’t tell me about it I then asked his son and when I told him his son told me and asked him again he never still answered then we hear a huge heated ugly fight where he stormed out. He was using my car cause he sold his car to have money to start the process of the immigration. And then the next week he gave my car back and said that he will find his own way to work. We worked together but we never lived together. Then the next Wednesday I drove to his house and he came he with her old car then we had another fight cause he said he was taking the bus home. He then ended things and I didnt had contact with him for the while of December. Then in the 27th Dec tried to reach out calling me to my work line and Skype messaging me he eventually unblocked me on Whatsapp to me to meet me so we can conclude the breakup and I did respond to him as I get there was no need to and because I wasn’t ready yet. Then in the 5th he tried to call me and I never answered his calls he then sent me a WhatsApp message saying the my things is standing next to my house. And that my reluctance to communicate is driving him further away. I still didn’t respond to that. Then S time got closer for him to go to work he started posting status on Whatsapp directed at me and I did the same. I then called him we spoke to an hour……we agreed to meet the next day. Things went well we laughed,chatted he hugged me we even walked hand in hand. Then the next day he invited me out for stand up comedy…………we left parked off somewhere talking and had sex he even gave me the late birthday present he bought me the next day we met again sat, spoke for about 2 hours and I left. Then the next week we me again and sat and just spoke cause him an I planned to open a business together as I resigned from my job and had my pension fund pay out. In December he spent alot of time with her and the kids them taking the kids out ad doing things with them. Tha Wednesday we met them we were brain storming about the business. Then the Thursday I get a message from him saying that we can’t be friends anymore cause he can’t be in a relationship and be there for his kids as they cannot go through what they went through in Dec seeing him like that in a state. I told him I just wanted to be friends even though it was hard cause I still love him. Then I was scammed out of my money so he call me Monday I’m in tears and he comes and speak to me then he leaves we dont talk after that again. Then Wednesday I get a message from him saying me must go out separate ways again and I can’t understand. Now I’m blocked from all his social media what can I do I miss him and I still love him very much I’m kinda depressed

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 17, 2020 at 10:55 am

Hi Lindsay I am sorry this has happened to you! I suggest that you seek out legal advice about your financial situation and focus on that for now. The rest with your ex will be less important than your pension funds! It is really emotionally draining to go through a break up and it takes it toll but make sure you a refocusing on what is important for your future for now!

Rachel

February 8, 2020 at 11:31 pm

My boyfriend of 2 years has literally ended our relationship today and has asked me to move out by tomorrow.
I have had severe financial difficulties over the past year which I wasn’t open and upfront with him about as I was so scared of being worthless and a let down. But instead got myself into more trouble. Over the past year little bits and pieces have unravelled about how bad my situation was but not the entirety of it. However 3 weeks ago it did. It wasn’t great – far from it. But he decided to give me a chance at redeeming myself as long as no further secrets. At the time I did say there may be things that do come up that I haven’t remembered (as there was a lot) but i was prioritising the major things. However I promised to be completely upfront and if anything else did come to light I would face it head on and make sure he was completely involved. It’s been a journey the past few weeks as he ultimately doesn’t trust me at the moment. Despite me adhering to his every condition. Including have full access to my bank accounts and helping me budget properly. But last night something else came to fruition from my past that he just can’t get past. He unfortunately was told direct About this situation and instead of coming to me direct, instead contacted my mum to get here today to remove me from the house as it was over and he couldn’t take this anymore. He didn’t tell me any of this and went to the gym this morning then took the dog out and didn’t come back. Instead my mum appeared at my door when I was expecting him back when he said he would be. She delivered the news and that I need to be out by tomorrow. He has blocked me and refuses to talk to me. He has only spoken to my mum over the phone and will hang up anytime I try to talk. The situation is just awful. But this can’t be over. It really can’t. Not like this. I do believe we are meant to be together but I am absolutely broken. I have swallowed a hard pill the past month and working hard on me to be the best version of myself as well as living by his strict conditions to make this work. Now he has ended it just like that. And won’t even tell me to my face. I don’t know what to do. I feel sick and just can’t deal with this. I can’t get my head around how he loves me yesterday to not ever wanting to see me again today.
Nelly

February 8, 2020 at 11:26 pm

This is the second time he has broken up with me.I have practised no contact for two and half months now.When we meet ,he talks to me but not on social media and text or phone calls he has never done any of these ever since we broke up.what does it mean?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 11, 2020 at 11:36 pm

Hi Nelly if you have done no contact for 2 months then you need to attempt to reach out with a text that Chris suggest to open that way of conversation, but you need to make sure you do not skip the value ladder or chain so that you can get your ex investing time in you

Terry

February 2, 2020 at 9:51 am

I broke up with my girlfriend after three years about four months ago because at the moment I thought it was right. I felt she was very rude to me and my friends constantly and would get mad at me over insignificant things, which I wish we would have talked over instead of me just ending it right away. I regretted it immensely. She said I was her world and revolved her world around me. A week after the breakup, she started talking to her ex. The rebound lasted about a month which is when I realized I messed up. She decided she didn’t want me back when I tried to reconnect with her. Every attempt I have had since then has failed. She says I didn’t want to fix things right away and she was not my world like I was to her. I feel she is still mad about the breakup even after four months. It seems she wants nothing to do with me and I am scared she is moving on.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 7, 2020 at 10:15 pm

Hi Terry, start following the process, starting with a No Contact and work on yourself so that you are the best version of yourself. Then start the texting phase where you use the texts that Chris suggests to capture their attention and get them talking to you. Read about the being there method too if she is moving on with other people in the mean time

Dory

January 30, 2020 at 1:12 am

Hello! I’m not sure what to do. We broke up a few weeks ago (2-3). At first, he stayed in contact and stated that he wants to ensnare on good terms and be friends. But within those few weeks, we’ve watched a movie together and planned for another, and I stopped by to see the puppy that we both were taking care of before the breakup. Things were fine until I drunk dialed him over this past weekend. I don’t rmemeber what happened, but I know that he was very upset and annoyed and stated something along the lines of “you’re too focused on me,” “you haven’t grown, we shouldn’t get back together,” and something about “Staying in contact is hard right now.” We were supposed to watch the second movie together yesterday, but that was cancelled due to my drunk call. I sent him a text apologizing for my behavior earlier today, and I didn’t receive a response. I found out that he’s on a dating app, and I removed soft blocked him. What is the best thing to do now to get him back? How long should the no contact period be for this situation? And does he text me first after that period, or do I?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 8, 2020 at 4:42 pm

Hey Dory like he said you are too focused on him right now. You need to focus on yourself. Go into a No Contact allow him to have this break up and time apart. During which time if you read and implement the work that is required to become Ungettable it will help your chances in getting your ex to reconsider his decisions. You can reach out after a 30 day No contact

Rhianna

January 29, 2020 at 11:30 am

Hello, my ex told me (about 2 weeks ago) that he just isn’t feeling it and that we should remove each other off social media so we can both move on and go our separate ways. We were together for 2 years and we were best friends before dating. He ended up removing me from snapchat because he says it was too frequent and has kept me on every other social media. Our relationship took a turn after we both graduated with the stress of getting jobs etc. He first mentioned not feeling the spark anymore and feeling a bit “lost” in life in September. We then tried going on a break and afterwards broke up but continued to see each other occasionally e.g. he took me to Thorpe park for Halloween, we went winter wonderland and went clubbing at New Years together (so were significant meet ups) and we did not see other people. His recent decision 2 weeks ago is like I’m being broken up with again when we weren’t in a relationship anyway. He seems serious about not speaking in his words “until the dust has settled then I’m sure in the future we will speak again”. I’d like to know how no contact will work when my ex is the one that doesn’t want to speak anymore. Is there any other methods I should focus on? Also how should I use social media to get his curiosity as I only really posted on Snapchat. Thank you.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

February 7, 2020 at 8:47 pm

Hey Rhianna I would read about being Ungettable and then apply that to your life as you are going to need to work on yourself for sometime, as for how to get his attention posting the exciting and interesting things you are doing with your life on social media even if it is SnapChat, post it to somewhere more permanent too such as Facebook because he may miss stories from time to time.

Mariah

January 27, 2020 at 11:01 pm

Hello EBR team
I broke up with my boyfriend 4 weeks ago. He never contacted me since and i have a feeling he might not want to talk to me. I know the breakup was hard for him the first 3 weeks. However recently he seems to have gone back to his ex. I dont know how to approach this and whether or not i should continue no contact upto 6 weeks. Is it possible to re-establish contact because he doesnt seem receptive to it.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 31, 2020 at 11:27 pm

Hi Mariah, do you want your ex back? Or do you only want your ex back because it appears that he has moved on?

Jay

January 26, 2020 at 6:13 pm

Ok, my ex works with me and we broke up because i hardly see him due to his work schedule. We would go months without seeing each other and we’ve been together for 10 months. We broke up around Christmas because “of course “ we never spend time together and I’ve had enough! And, now when i see him at work i miss him so much. It’s been a month since we broke up. When we see each other he doesn’t speak to me and i don’t speak to him.
Gio

January 14, 2020 at 8:57 pm

He broke-up with me at the end of July after over 17 years together. It was an emotional break-up for both of us, and there are no negative feelings involved. I was and I am still devastated. I tried to send him a message after 3 weeks from the break-up without asking anything really, just pointing out that I understood he needed some time and space. He answered, but his answer left me even more in despair: his tone was almost condescending and he did even contradicted himself -compared to what he told me the day of the break-up. That day, I had no doubt he still cared about me a lot, but after that message… I am no longer sure.
I was so hurt that I (inadvertently) avoided any kind of further contact until Christmas, i.e. 4 months since our last message exchange.
I turned 40 in November and he didn’t even send me a text. I sent him a text for Christmas, something nice but neutral. He replied right away, but while my message was directed to him, his reply was directed to me and my family, mentioning that he hoped we were ok. I replied again trying to ask him what he and his family were doing for Christmas, but he avoided “reading” the Whatsapp message. I sent another text for New Year, where I wrote I hoped he was doing ok. Again, he didn’t “read” the message first, then I guess he accidentally did it 2 days later, but he didn’t reply nonetheless (he strangely only answered my mother’s message).
I am (and still) even afraid to run into him. I’ve been told he’s not doing ok, that he is barely seeing his family members and that he lost a lot of weight, to the point that common acquaintances thought he looked “terminally ill”. I am worried about him, and I still love him deeply, but it looks like he wants to completely erase me from his existence, even though it’s been his choice to break things up. I really don’t understand how he could close a 17 years relationship in 20 minutes and (apparently) without any doubt, not even an afterthought, all the while erasing me completely.
For many reasons, and considering his personal struggles and all the troubles he was (and still is) facing, I even started to think that he might be having depression, something I doubt he could be aware of.
I really don’t know what else I should do, I feel powerless.

Thank you.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 18, 2020 at 12:14 pm

Hi Gio it does sound as if he is going through something emotional. If people are telling you he is looking unwell and he is not bothering with his own family. It could be depression but you can not assume as he may just feel that he needs to be done with certain people for his own reasons right now. I would suggest that you stop reaching out for some time and just work on yourself as hard as it is. It is difficult to not speak to someone who you have spent 17 years of your life with as you get into the habit of being able to speak with them whenever you wanted to. But you do need to heal and get over him on some level because of the break up and if you were to get back together you would have to restart and build up that trust and connection again

Alex

January 10, 2020 at 2:42 am

My ex broke up with me 2 days after Christmas because we found out I was pregnant and he didn’t want that to happen well due to some circumstances I lost the baby and we still have each other on social media and he watches my every move… only thing is that he will talk to me when he gets curious and uses any lame excuse to talk to me. So it makes no NC rule a little more difficult, I want him back but what should I do? It’s been 2 weeks since our break up and I hate not talking to him but he acts like everything is ok

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 14, 2020 at 8:55 pm

Hi Alex, so does he know that there is no longer a baby in the situation? If so then there is no reason to speak with him going forward and you can complete a full No Contact, if he is curious or not. Start following a proper No Contact where you work on yourself and do not reply to your ex for at least 30 days

Sara

January 9, 2020 at 9:49 pm

I am at a loss as to what to do. We broke up in September as a result converging major stressors that we did not manage well at all. Overall we had an incredibly intimate relationship and were incredibly compatible and wanted the same things. We were actively discussing marriage prior to our breakup and living together. That said we did not resolve conflict well together and that was one more issue contributing to our breakup. We essentially broke up when I stepped back and asked for some space because of how stressed out I was due to what was going on. I think that hurt him and made him feel insecure so he went ahead and just blew everything up. Two weeks after the break up I reached out and told him I wanted to work on the relationship. He responded by being very closed off, mean, and just simply hurtful. It ended in a terrible fight and I went no contact. Since then I wrote him an email laying out what I think happened and why, and owning my part of what contributed to our end. A few weeks later he wrote back thanking me for the email and saying he was sorry, but that he didn’t have the bandwidth at that time to deal with a real response due to some ongoing health issues and work (which I do believe). I didn’t reply but one day in December I decided to leave the rest of his stuff at his house when he wasn’t there. Of course when I was driving away he saw me and actually followed me a distance to make sure it was me. I sent him a text apologizing for not giving him a heads up that I was dropping off his stuff. He replied a few days later saying no worries and that he would get my stuff to me soon. We exchanged a few texts over the next few days, but it eventually kind of stopped because I tried to call him at one point and he didn’t not answer and never replied to my last text. I haven’t reached out or heard from him since. At this point I am deliberating sending him a valentines gift….but I’m not sure if that is a good idea or not. He just has a huge wall up. He is very proud and also has children, so he just closed ranks and I don’t know how to get past that. I figured I would send him a Valentine’s day gift and try one more time to reach out to him, but I don’t know the best way forward. He is a very romantic guy and loves getting gifts and attention…typical Leo. I know he loved me deeply but I think he is too proud to reach out hence why I think I should…any input would be appreciated. Thank you!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 17, 2020 at 2:29 pm

Hey Sara, so NO VALENTINES GIFTS! You need to complete a No Contact and work yourself a lot right now, you are chasing someone who wants to be left alone for some time. Read what it means to complete a real no contact and what you should be doing with your time. You can reach out to your ex when you have completed 30 days of FULL no contact

Diane

December 27, 2019 at 5:36 pm

Hello, I’m at a total loss. My ex boyfriend broke up with me just a months ago since the very first day he sent the text that he couldn’t do it anymore and that we may as well go our separate ways he will not speak to me. I don’t know what to do as all of my things are still at his house am I supposed to just go there and get them? We have been through this before he has broken up with me before he uses it as a weapon sometimes so I don’t really know if this is real. I wish he would even just reply to tell me to screw off and leave him alone but he won’t even reply that. I’ve never felt so abandoned in my whole life how could he just completely stopped talking to me? A week after we broke up with me he was home from working out of town I tried to call him he hung up on the first ring I tried to text him he wouldn’t respond. I left it alone for another week and a half I tried phoning him he didn’t answer I didn’t leave a message. 2 days before Christmas I messaged him acknowledging my part of The Break-Up and that I was so sorry for it and that he was the only person I wanted to spend the holidays with and he still didn’t respond. What am I supposed to do will the no contact rule even work if you won’t even talk to you? Do I go get my things? Even though he won’t respond to me. We have a lot of mutual friends and they’re throwing a New Year’s Eve party I’d really like to go to the party as I’ve been alone through all of the holidays and it would be good to be out with friends but do I even go to that when they’re mutual friends? I could really use some advice right now… Thanks

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 3, 2020 at 12:04 am

Hey Diane, did you go to the party? I hope you did to show how well you are doing even though you are broken up. As for your things you can ask a mutual friend to go with you to collect your items so that forces your ex to behave in a certain way. If you NEED the things you have left there. If you don’t need anything that is there then you can wait until you are done with No Contact

zelda

December 22, 2019 at 7:20 am

Since day 1 we had a connection. We both never believed in love at first sight until we seen each other. Long story short, he had a huge outburst of anger because I broke up with him for the sole purpose of trying to get my life together. He was very cold to me when I tried to get him to talk to me in person and figure this out. I then stopped talking to him. I seen him for the first time in 2 weeks when he showed up unannounced to return my wallet. I asked him if he wanted to talk and he said he had a few minutes. We talked about how we are doing and about our plans. he smiled a lot but had a hard time holding my gaze and would stare off into the distance a lot. It was a short talk because he said he should get going. I messaged him saying “I do regret pushing you away Robbie, and I’m sorry.. I wanted to apologize in person. I still want a future with you because our connection started on day one. It built up from there. I want to be with you and that desire never stopped. If you really dont want me, then I understand, it was never meant to be. But I’m giving it my last shot.. I never stopped loving you. I think about hugging you as I sleep, every night. I think about holding your hand and seeing you smile. I dont want anybody else! Can we please start over?” and he never responded. it’s been two days.

We loved each other so much it was incredible. Now this.. is there any chance for US? What could he be thinking?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 22, 2019 at 6:04 pm

Hi Zelda, you need to go into a no contact and start working on yourself, look up the ungettable girl and how to implement that to your life. Allowing your ex to have the no contact from you also gives them a chance to start remembering the positives about you and start to miss you too. So stick with it for at least 30 days

Ana

December 21, 2019 at 9:07 pm

My boyfriend and I were together 6 months long distance. We were discussing marriage and making plans for me to move there. He was always amorous and very attentive. Issues arose with his sons and his ex denying visitation and he said he needed space. I waited a week and went out to see him as we had planned and he confirmed but it was quiet and awkward and I ended up crying. He said he didn’t want to see me the rest of the weekend and I broke things off. I texted him the next week stating I was sorry if I’d hurt him and he simply said I hope things work for you as well. I have some very volatile family members who I mistakenly confided in who contacted him. He told one of them he simply didn’t love me more than a friend but that he hoped someday we got back together. The other two were fights and I asked them to apologize for contacting him. He reached out to me telling me they were contacting him and I immediately asked them to stop. I wished him a happy thanksgiving the following week and I friended him on Facebook and Instagram. He did not respond. I waited 21 days and then reached out again and there was no response. I know he will be in town soon to see his son but I just feel lost. It felt very abrupt and confusing and now I don’t know if we even have a chance.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 21, 2019 at 11:01 pm

Hi Ana so I would either reach out with a text that Chris suggests before Christmas, or wait until after the new year is over, but do not wish them happy holidays again. You need to make your ex wonder where you have gone as he will expect to hear from you. Work on yourself about being the Ungettable girl

Dina

December 21, 2019 at 7:36 pm

My ex and I just recently broke up today marks a month since we broke up. A quick summary on our relationship we were a pretty happy couple who also had several issues just like any other couple . Fast forward over the summer I found out he was texting a girl , it was nothing too crazy but he was still saying very inappropriate things someone in a relationship shouldn’t be saying as well as I see messages between him and his bestfriend implying that he had brought a girl to his hotel room when taken away for army training (they were placed in hotel rooms that specific training .) Fast forward I forgave him. I decided to give him a second chance , he did confess to texting the first girl , but with the mysterious girl from the army training he told me he didn’t remember because I had no concrete prove I let it go but it did diminish my trust level for him alittle bit. My ex had been going through a lot of finical problems throughout our relationship and I stood next to him no matter how many times he would push me away when he was stressed out , my ex is the type of people who push away the people closest to them when they are stressed out so we weren’t having sec I wasn’t even seeing him I would complain about this several times , at the time I thought he was possibly cheating on me but he wasn’t he was just stressed out and under alot of pressure , we could go 2 months without having sex or even seeing each other , fast forward a couple of months later on a drunk night I ended up cheating on him with a stranger . after a lot of self evaluation I realized the reason I cheated on him is because I wasn’t getting any thing sexually my ex is the love of my life though he wasn’t perfect he tried but sexually he did not want to have sex at all and he would always use the excuse of being stressed out and going through it and sex was the last thing on his mind . However after what I did I felt immense guilt and I wanted to tell him but I couldn’t because of the circumstances. His grandfather had died and his birthday was the weekend after and he was already stressed out .I couldn’t break the news to him inbeteeen those two events so I decided to wait after his birthday, fast forward my ex’s bestfriend and I were planning a surprise birthday party for him ,, my ex best friend had invited some of his personal friends to come to the party come to find out the guy I had the one night stand with was one of them and in conversation told my exes bestfriend who then confronted me . Immediately I told the truth and I said I would confess to my ex two days before his birthday. I went and I confessed and his initial reaction was a breakup but after us talking more he said he needed some space and time to think about if he would give me a second chance . Honestly I did not really give him any space so we all though we didn’t talk everyday we would talk every 2 days and have pretty good conversations. I asked him to meet in person to talk and he told me he would let me know if I should come to his house or he would come to mine . Finally last week Friday we were texting all morning , I disappeared for an hour to take a test and came back and suddenly then my ex has ghosted and ignored me till now, initially I did not realize he was ignoring me after 3 days after I realized he was reading my messages and not responding . I was at his mothers house yesterday helping his sister get ready for her senior pictures and he was supposed to come over to give some stuff to her she informed me but I had spoken to his bestfriend friend earlier while being there and my ex texted his little sister and told her he wasn’t coming over anymore (possibly because he knew I was there ) , however in this period I spoke to his other bestfriend who confessed to me the mysterious girl who I had seen the text messages about did go to his hotel room, my ex had found her from tinder and she came to his hotel room his bestfriend claims they did not have sex but they did kiss ( I find it hard to believe because kissing typically leads to other things ) , however I did my wrong and he did His and I honestly have forgiven him and I’m willing to try on the relationship one more time but he doesn’t know I know, he has ignored me for a full week and I have stopped contacting him but I miss him so much and I want him back so much . I know he was already stressed out about the stuff he had going on prior to this coming out and the few timeS we spoke after he told me he was still stressed out and dealing with those things and he honestly does not want to think about our relationship right now although it is important cis he cannot out his head in a negative space so is that why he is ignoring me suddenly? Please help me get him back .

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 23, 2019 at 7:55 pm

Hey Dina, it sounds as if you both need some space away from each other – this is the reason we do no contact. So you need to give yourself and your ex this time of silence. Do not reach out or reply to him for 30 days, don’t ask friends about him or check social media etc. Work on yourself in that time. And then reach out end of January as a friend and see how the conversation goes form there

Kennedy

December 5, 2019 at 2:06 pm

My story:
We had been dating for 8 months and everything was so good. We started off quick and things went fast which I think was an issue. We broke up for about a week at the 6 month mark and got back together. I wrote him a letter and left it at his door and he contacted me after that. It was good from there on out. Or so I thought. He was so loving, he always kissed me in the mornings or when I was napping, we went on dates, we always laughed together, and it was just pure love. It was so different with him, everything. He constantly made me feel beautiful and loved and was always there to listen and we hardly ever argued. Then one night his actions just changed and he said he had been feeling weird about us. Literally minutes before that he was calling me beautiful and asking me to stay the following night. We met the next night and he broke up with me saying he didn’t want a relationship and felt he was young and needed to make more mistakes and live the single life. He is 22. He stated “he didn’t love me like I love him”. We talked a few days after the break up and just asked how we were but it was always me initiating contact. So I let it for for about a week, wrote him another letter, and then he immediately texted me saying he just doesn’t want a relationship and that he’s not the perfect one for me. We argued a small amount and then we said we could always stay friends. I told him that the only reason I kept saying that we are good together is because God keeps telling me we are. He has never sent me any of these feelings or signs about a man before. So his reply was “always listen to God. He’s all we really have”. That was basically it. It’s been a day and I know I need to not contact him. It’s the holiday season and we had a trip planned to go to Mexico in two weeks which he will still be going on. It’s hard for me, and I am truly happy with myself, I know I’m worth it, and I know I’m awesome. I just wish he would see that because I would do anything for this man, and he deserves one like that. I messed up by not giving then I contact rule the appropriate amount of time, I was selfish.
I would just like some input on what to do, should I unfollow him? He’s happy without me and stated he moved on in our last conversation, but it had only been about two weeks from out break up. Is it possible he moved on or is he just saying that? I miss him and I do want him back in my life. I’m praying that God leads him back to me before I move on completely.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 6, 2019 at 10:16 pm

Hey Kennedy, so no don’t unfollow him if you are still trying to get him back as you want him to be able to see how well you are doing – Look up Ungettable and work on that theory while you complete a 30 day no contact where you do not reach out to them and you do not reply if they reach out to you. Once NC is over you can reach out as the new improved version of yourself and then go on to build a conversation and re connect in a positive way and work your way through the program slowly making sure you make the most of all the information that is on this website and in Chris YouTube channel full on videos helping you through each stage of the process

Sharline

December 3, 2019 at 10:54 pm

My boyfriend of 3 year broke up with me suddenly saying he doesn’t love me. I don’t understand because the week before he was all over me and saying he loved me and was taking about our future. After he broke up with me I asked if I could call him to get some clarification on things and he couldn’t give me straight answer on when he started feeling like this and why he was feeling like this. And I said I want going to beg him to stay with me if he didn’t want to and that was the last time I talked to him. He then blocked me off of every social media but I don’t know if he blocked my number. I really want him back as before this our relationship was very good and I thought that we were very compatible.
Amanda

November 29, 2019 at 7:25 pm

A little back story.. my ex boyfriend and I were together almost 2 years. What started out as long distance for almost 7 months, changed when he moved to my state for a few months. His job offered him an offer to great to pass up to come back and I supported the decision. We continued long distance for for a few more months, then came the decision for me move to his state 2.5 hours away to take our relationship to the next level, long term commitment. Ive now been her 6 months, and it has been damn near perfect. The past 2 months have been challenging as life became more real. His stress level at work has increased which overflowed to home. He became distant and shut off to me, his health issues (Crohns among others) have exacerbated, he is down all the time. Ive tried to be supportive, it pushes him away. Ive tried stepping back, it pushes him away. Ive been my normal happy, flirtacious, laughing, joking self with him.. nothing. Ive questioned what is wrong with me, how can I make you so happy but yet be shut out. It caused friction and disagreements, then I feel Im walking on eggshells to not trigger anything. So, two weeks ago, I took a girls trip with my girlfriends from back home. Very little communication due to one, the location in the mountains, and two, he rarely responded. Which I thought may do us some goox, a few days apart. When I came home I was so excited to see him, and he just seemed as distant. Irritated even. The next day after work we had dinner, everything just seemed off. He kissed me the next morning and we told each other we loved each other like always when I walk him to the door every morning. That evening we rode around talking (just something we always enjoyed doing), and he basically said I love you and I dont want you to go, but this isnt working and I dont know how to fix it. He said it may be him, it may be me, or both if us. He said the very thing that he wants (us) is the very thing that scares him. And that maybe we should just stay together through the holidays, which I said I couldnt pretend knowing we were over. That night I packed a small bag and stayed at a friends house to give him a little space. We didnt talk at all. I texted him the following afternoon and just simply said I love you, he responded back with I love you. He said that has never been in question. I went back to the house after work and he was across the street at him mom’s so I called him and told him I was home. He said get what you need, but I dont want to see you or talk to you. I got my clothes and went on. On Friday we spoke and he basically repeated everything that he originally said. Tuesday, we texted, and he said we needed to make arrangements to move my things. I asked what worked best for him, and he said he didnt know. Since then he changed his FB picture and page to say separated, not single, which is just confusing. Im visiting my son and DIL for Thanksgiving, and I checked myself in to the Army base where he is stationed, and yesterday the ex liked that post. His family is shocked. Our friends are shocked. Im devastated and feel like Ive been hit out of nowhere. Another back story, he married his high school sweetheart who after 13 years cheated on him and divorced him. It was really messy to the point where they continue to not communicate. He said from all he went through with her that he doesnt know if he could ever truly be happy, and maybe he is just permanently ruined. I do know he still loves me very much, he has told everyone this since he called it quits. I just dont know what to do. Do I continue to give him space? Do I move on? I don’t want him to feel I gave up on him. Do I go back to my state? Stay here? How long do I wait? I don’t feel I would get anywhere with him if we discussed it, as shut down as he is. I feel it will push him further away. He has all the symptoms of depression, and his doctor picked up on it, but he refuses medication. He has even mentioned that he is so stressed it would be easy for him to just put a gun in his mouth. I’m lost and torn on what to do. Help please!!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

December 4, 2019 at 7:38 pm

Hey Amanda, so it sounds as if your ex needs the head space to deal with their emotions, as much as it is hard to accept at times people need to just be alone so start and stick to a no contact, where you do not reply or reach out to him for for minimum 30 days and hope that he seeks professional help to deal with his emotions if he is feeling that low. So follow the program and stick with it working your way through the stages

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