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Maryam
March 15, 2019 at 2:08 am
Hi Chris
Can I explain my situation in an email? Please send me an email if you can. Thank you
Chris Seiter
March 15, 2019 at 4:04 pm
Hi Maryam!
So you can use the “Contact Form” link found at the bottom of each of my pages to send my a confidential communication.
Luis Perez
March 12, 2019 at 11:45 am
My ex and I were together for a little over 2 months. We both had an initial spark at the beginning of the relationship. Over the course of the two months I was let down with Valentine’s Day (gift) and just felt like I was putting more in than him. I spoke with him about this and gave him 2 weeks to try to fix our problem there and then I ultimately made the decision to break up with him. After breaking up we held each other for a good 30 minutes and just cried on each other. I felt like the spark was gone but after this emotional break up I began to think that he must care a lot for me since we both just cried on each other for that long. Two days later we meet to talk about the decision. I still was tore as to what to do (get back together, or stay single) and so I’ve been reading articles and asking people for advice. Part of me wants to get back with him, while another part of me is scared that I may hurt him again. I’m unsure what to do bc I feel like I didn’t give him a long enough chance. He’s a great person and didn’t do anything wrong but I just felt like my schedule and his were too packed and any down time I had I wanted to relax while he usually wanted to go do things. We agreed to be friends for now and I still talk with him most days and I just don’t know if I did the right thing or not.
Chris Seiter
March 12, 2019 at 8:43 pm
Hi Luis! So just take some time and reflect on what is important to you. Sometimes a little distance can help you gain some perspective and feel free to tap into my EBR Pro Program!
Bay
March 12, 2019 at 9:21 am
I broke up with my bf yesterday, we’ve been dating for 3 years now, I hardly recognize myself because this relationship just drains me out, I get moody whenever I’m with him. I’m never happy, and this started just a few months ago! I think he there’s a part of his life he’s not being honest about and when I confront him , he makes it seem I’m the one overthinking things which makes me crazy and in so much doubts about him, over time this affected who I felt about him and I realized I’m tired and I need to move on. But now I’m wondering if I did the wrong thing breaking up with him
Chris Seiter
March 12, 2019 at 8:45 pm
Hi Bay! So why not just implement No Contact as it is designed to help you with the healing and focus on recovery activities, while also allowing you to assess your priorities and interest level in your ex. Check out my EBR Pro Program to learn more!
Steed
February 26, 2019 at 5:17 am
I was with my ex for 3 years we were happy, she was wonderful he loved my children he was a little selfish at times hard for him to understand what it was to live with children although he did fairly well. He loved his PlayStation 2 play Madden football and also watched sports it felt like 24/7. But I was okay with all of those things. I then got a job after several months and had my new job my boss kept making passes at me after two years he had me convinced the relationship I was in was not healthy for me after the third year I had it in my head My relationship was not healthy for me and I had him move out … I started dating my boss now I regret my decision and I terribly Miss my ex. I don’t feel like my ex would ever speak to me because of how the situation ended up and how another man came in between us.
Nicole P
February 18, 2019 at 1:53 am
I was in an on again off again relationship for almost 5 years with this hunky nerd. It’s hard for me to connect with people let alone get the mental and visual stimulation I need in one package so I stuck around even after finding out he was in a long distance relationship. I leave he contact me and I was his sucker all over again. He knew what to say and how to behave just enough to keep me around. Our sexual chemistry was off the charts, but he left his girl and started going crazy with other females. He became unhealthily, and jeopardized my heath. He promises me many thing but then I started to realize the trees for the forest. I know I have to leave, so I did 3weeks ago and did no contact aka block since I know I would be weak. I don’t want him back because me and my kids deserve better, but I am missing the memories/fantasy. He puts a spell in me whenever we talk so I had to block him on all messaging sites. It’s difficult knowing I will never talk to him again and that he might straighten up for another girl. I’m okay with cutting my losses and improving myself, but how do you cope knowing the relationship has to be over forever since it’s toxic and he has power over me if we talk?
MommaBear
January 12, 2019 at 3:12 am
I met him 8 months ago and it was love at first sight we both felt it. The first couple weeks of our relationship was amazing than he started showing his true colours.
I have a 7 year old, they didn’t get along that good, both egg each other on. I asked him once, only once to watch my child, so my roommate could sleep in because he was sick. (My roommate also is my babysitter) my kid didn’t listen to my ex and he called my boy a little Sh*t!
He has two of his own children, one that didn’t want to live with him and one that the mother refused him access to. (That should Have been Red lights)
He told me that I didn’t care about his children, which was a lie. I care about his kids.
He has massive debt because of 2 failed marriages and other poor decisions, careless spending habits (expenive new cars) Creditors call him daily. I told him that I was concerned with that because if we ever got married that debt would become my problem as well. No thank you! I just got debt free recently.
He said that I should leave his past alone, that it was none of my business….
Blamed me for everything, all the arguments over stupid things, all the mornings waking up alone to find him on couch, he apparently did no wrong, innocent little devil.
Great sex, maybe that’s why I miss him??
Ann
December 26, 2018 at 1:48 am
I broke up with him due to a one sided relationship where I did all the heavy lifting, finance 90% of our dates, let him borrow my car when his broke down . This went on for 17 months . I discussed my concerns with him and each time he said he would do better, this lasted less than a millisecond. I was emotionally exhausted as he was quite needy and dependent on me . I was turned off and wanted to end it early on but kept thinking it would get better. It didn’t and I realized he would not be there for me or contribute to a real relationship. I told him I can’t do anymore as I have nothing left. I gave him his stuff and he said “well I need to know if I make these changes that you won’t reject me”….. I said take your stuff .. I didn’t say bye as I was Mad at mostly myself for staying longer than i should. Perfect reason to dump him but now miss him. Or so I think, maybe it’s closure I want? Anyway I haven’t contacted him and he hasn’t contacted me almost 2 months now. Most days are good with a few days I feel bad and believe I misse him …
Chris Seiter
December 26, 2018 at 4:03 am
H Ann!
I can see why your were emotionally exhausted. Its normal to miss him. Do yourself a favor. Write down all the things you can think of that makes him a poor relationship partner. Don’t hold back. List everything. Then list out those things that make him a wonderful relationship partner. Then read it outloud to yourself a couple times and think about whether this is the kind of person you wish to spend every day of your life with. Then go out and get my eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book” as it dives into a lot of things that can help you with your healing and recovery!
Annora Amabel
November 29, 2018 at 9:52 pm
Hie, i broke up yesterday. It was 5 years of relationship, one and half together and 3 and half in long distance. He has OCD episodic, i tried to understand him best and be the best of friend, help him with his therapies and everything. He is great guy, but when his episodic OCD arrives that becomes altogether emotionally challenging for me to deal with it, he withdraws himself emotionally and the only conversation happening at that points are about his OCD. I feel unattended, not cared for and he becomes emotionally rigid under influence of Antidepressants. In past manyatimes out of sheer hurt and emotional hurdles to communicate i broke up but then went back to him. He apologiesed and worked on himself as well. We both care for each other but whenever i tried to breakup he threatned me with self harm that bothers me alot. His family doesn’t value me or like me and he is close to his family. I broke up yesterday because of the whole emotional exertion and his inability to understand and care for me these days, he is having his antidepressants these days…. i know that i care for him, but these whole thing take a toll on my daily life and routine…. i want to go away from him, and i made him clear that yesterday. But the guilt of me leaving him at his worst and terrible missing that is coming to me is bothering me. Please Help me through this.
Rach
March 18, 2018 at 8:51 pm
OK, so I broke up with my ex a year ago. He’s got avoidance issues I reckon. Didn’t really discuss the future much; kids etc. I’m 36 he’s in his 40s. I’m rubbish at making him talk too. I couldn’t figure out if i didn’t want kids because I assumed he didn’t want them and compromising myself. Also our intimacy had vanished and felt like we were companions living together. Then I somehow on auto pilot moved out – and spent a year processing what I want… and it’s still him. I thought about it alot and I still don’t want kids. So it wasn’t just because he didn’t.
We were together for 10 years. and now it’s been a year. and we stayed in touch throughout the year and met up once every few months. not talked about it- so he doesn’t know how I’ feeling (kids wise) but i did text a while ago saying that I still think we’re in a position to resolve things, and does he feel the same way. he replied instantly saying that he feels it happened for a reason and that it was coming for a while. and that he just wanted me to be happy and I weren’t. and he said he could at least get better at meeting up with me but he finds it hard.
Sine then we met up once (few months ago now) and if I ask to meet up he ignores my text. If i keep it light and fun then he’ll respond (but never with questions these days). so after some time of being nice, light conversations, today I asked if he he’s free to meet up for dinner. No response to that 🙁 What do you think I should do? Decade together – a year apart. I dodn’t regret leaving I needed too -but I want to go back now with this clarity
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 24, 2018 at 4:49 pm
Hi Rach,
Try the nc rule first.. Do at least 30 days of no initiating, no replying, no commenting back nor social media stalking but start a new daily routine.. Be very active in improving yourself and in posting in social media..
Sam
March 17, 2018 at 2:54 am
I broke up with my boyfriend over a month ago. I did and completed the 30 days. He tried contacting me a few times. First being Vday( a few days into no contact). Then a week later he sent me a long text basically saying, “he didn’t think it had to end like this”. And then later that day, he sent another long text asking if “I ever truly loved him, etc”. A week after that he called me one time. But I never responded. Fast forward to now, no contact ended Monday, and I waited till Wednesday to text him. I was at an art museum we had went to before, and I sent a pic of a painting we had loved soo much asking …” guess what art work I’m looking at??” He didn’t respond for two hours so I sent the pic anyway and asked if he remember how much we loved it. Still no response. I’m not sure if he’s ignoring me or if he blocked me?? And idk what to do??
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2018 at 4:53 pm
Hi Sam,
If he doesn’t respond after a week, try again.. If he still doesn’t respond, set a limit on until when you would wait for him to initiate.
Amera
March 16, 2018 at 5:22 pm
We are relative.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2018 at 3:50 pm
Nope, don’t congratulate him..
Amera
March 16, 2018 at 2:24 pm
Can I congratulate my ex for his engagement on social site…??
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 16, 2018 at 3:50 pm
Hi Amera,
You mean he got engaged to someone else? No, why would you congratulate him? Are you friends?
Amera
March 16, 2018 at 2:22 pm
Can i congratulate my ex for his engagement on social site..??