Popular posts
The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
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Post categories
cath
December 5, 2013 at 7:42 pm
he said no contact etc but i asked him does he really hate me that much… he actually replied with 2no” waht do i do now
admin
December 6, 2013 at 7:16 pm
I don’t think so. It is just a normal breakup thing to feel that way but really he doesn’t hate you.
Anon
December 5, 2013 at 1:42 am
I’ve been in complete NC for about 2 weeks now. I know I need to finish the NC time, but I just wanna know how to talk to him if it’s this awkward. (I don’t think it will be any less awkward in two more weeks.)
admin
December 5, 2013 at 6:32 pm
Have you read any of the guides covering this? Have you read the ebook?
Caroline
December 3, 2013 at 8:31 pm
And not annoy him *
Caroline
December 3, 2013 at 8:29 pm
I sent the I have a confession text and he responded but I have no clue what to make the confession text be now that he responded. I want to keep him reeled in and now annoy him. What should I do?
admin
December 5, 2013 at 12:36 am
Just keep him in the conversation..
BT
December 3, 2013 at 3:43 pm
I have done NC for 40 days. I’ve send him a Facebook message and a received a positive/neutral response. But after that he doesn’t respond anymore. Should I start NC again?
admin
December 3, 2013 at 8:11 pm
No you should find a way to hook him in the conversation more.
BT
December 3, 2013 at 9:32 pm
Even when he has a new girlfriend?
admin
December 5, 2013 at 12:43 am
Actually i have something huge planned for you coming up later this week.
BT
December 5, 2013 at 7:55 am
Oh thank you! I’m looking forward to that! I will wait on your new guide before I take any further steps đ
admin
December 5, 2013 at 6:59 pm
I am working on it every day. So, it is slowly getting done.
Sheena
December 2, 2013 at 7:08 am
Hi just read your article and I’m on day 35 of NC. It has helped me understand the No Contact idea better but my situation is complicated cause we are both in the same class and tomorrow will be the last day of our final paper…that means it’s my last day where I’ll see him. After days of no class, I saw him last week as we had a paper but he refused to look at my direction. Should I initiate contact or take it as he really does not want to have anything to do with me? **more deeds below**
Iâm 23 and this is my first ever relationship. Heâs 17 and we met in school. He was the first one to ask me out and on our 3rd date, he asked me to be his gf.
At first I had my guards up and kept telling myself that he would lose interest but then when I started to know him better, I fell for him.
Basically after about a month of knowing me and being my bf, he told me that he loves me. I thought it was just a slip of tongue or something so I didn’t reply. A couple of days later, he said it again and I told him that he shouldnât be saying things like that so quickly and that he should be absolutely certain of his feelings. He replied:âweâll that how I feel.â I didnât say it back cause at that point I wasnât sure if I really did love him or was just in love with the idea of having a bf. On our 4th month, I confessed that I love him too..cause I did feel it and was sure of my feelings.
After that HE would bring up topics of marriage, our future, names of our kids etc while I would talk about our plans for the following week. He promised me that he was in it for the long run..something that I never asked. I wanted to take things real slow and he was onboard..at first. At the very beginning I told him that I wasnât gonna sleep with him just cause he paid for my dinner and he understood. Just as I was getting more comfortable with him and getting around to the idea of sleeping with him, he changed.
We have done stuff but it was months into the relationship. As bitchy as this sounds, Itâs not like he was “deprived” or anything so what changed? He even said that he was happy at the rate we are going and that he was willing to wait for me to be ready. We did have a mini argument before he stopped contacting me. Mini argument was our first fight (I would say) and the reason why it was a mini argument was die to the lack of response from him. It was stupid (I got mad that he didnât contact me while away in holiday but had time to msg the whole world) and I apologised (even thou my friends think Iâm too relaxed with him as I donât check up on him or say anything when he chats to girls on fb etc) but he never respondedâŚuntil I had to use a private number to call him (as he wasnât picking up my calls). We talked, we met, HE asked if we were okay while giving me a huge hug, we did some stuff, had dinner then went home. It was all good. Texted him goodnight to which he replied âlove youâ and the NOTHING.
The days after that he completely ignored me. Didnât reply to any of my texts, calls..nothing. So after 2days of âbeggingâ him for some response..I gave up and started the no contact rule. We saw each other in class a few days after and he just ignored me. Till now Iâve got no idea what happen. I mean in relationship, mistakes are bound to happen right? Instead of working things out (like he said he would no matter what happens between us) he just gave up?
What hurts the most was how he did it. He could have just told me over the phone..hell even a text would have been better than nothing.
Okay my question: Is it really due to the age difference that he is immature enough to ignore me? Like what made him act this way? For all the time I’ve known him, he’s never acted immature. In fact, he’s been a gentleman up till now. Is it safe to say he was just using me to pass time? If so, then why ask me to be his gf or talk about our future together or even cook for me?
After days of no class, I saw him last week as we had a paper but he refused to look at my direction. Should I initiate contact or take it as he really does not want to have anything to do with me?
Sorry for the lengthy issue. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
admin
December 2, 2013 at 7:13 pm
May I ask why you are waiting so long in NC? After 30 days you can start tryign..
Sheena
December 3, 2013 at 4:05 pm
Because whenever we “lock eyes” in school for just a sec, he immediately looks away. Like I hurt him so bad that he can’t bear to even be in the same room as me let alone look at me.
Today was the last paper and I don’t know if I was just fooling myself but I swear I felt him looking at me (as he was preparing to enter the examination hall and I was in the other room, he had the perfect view of me). On the other hand, 30 mins before, at the train station I was waiting for my friend, he walked right past me (I saw him but pretended to be busy on my phone).
I’ve had a lot of others telling me that the reason he’s acting this way is cause he’s immature and doesn’t know how to handle the situation properly. and as for he’s sudden change of attitude might be cause of his family (funny thing is when we had just started seeing each other, he wanted me to meet his parents but i refused as i thought it was too early in the relationship). I was pretty rude and cold to him when we were first going out and he never “ran for the hills” but when I started to warm up..he leaves.
I’ve been told to leave him alone and not “pester” him for a reason as to why all this happen cause his answers will not be pleasant…but I just refuse to believe he was just using me. I mean after all he has paid for all my meals, bought me (expensive) earrings and neckless, sang to me (something he does when he’s happy), cooked for me…why would a 17-year old go through all that just to “pass time”?
Come to think about it, there were times were he showed no concern (like when I told him of an accident I was in while he was overseas. Had expected him to get mad for not telling him but he’s reaction was…nothing.) and other times where he would hug me cause I was feeling cold or offer to carry my bag knowing its heavy.
…arghh! he’s driving me crazy!
Emma
November 30, 2013 at 6:04 am
So say that you contacted him after the break up and wouldn’t quit texting or sending emails for 5 days. Could you just quit talking too him and use the NC rule & get him back??? Or did I screw up big time. Every time I contact him he says “let it go” or “I don’t really wanna talk” or says ” I’m not with you because you can’t learn how too think before you speak so change it” do I have any hope of getting him back with the NC rule, we broke up 5 or 6 days ago and now I wanna try the NC rule because I’m not getting anywhere when I keep emailing him alot. He keeps telling me too “stop” please email me a answer, thanks
admin
November 30, 2013 at 7:04 pm
Yes definitely try NC.
Emma
November 30, 2013 at 7:56 pm
And another thing is me and my ex have been together 5 yrs. I made the mistake in telling him some guy kissed me when me and him were broken up for 4 days. He just found out because I got mad and told him I kissed someone but it was when we weren’t together because I would never cheat on him. So I ended up telling him that out of anger because he told me with the way I act I will never get a guy so I ended up saying” so how home this guy kissed me then?” Or I said I kissed someone. It was just a peck and he kissed me first. Now I have no boyfriend because I can’t think before I act. Are we completely done now? I didn’t cheat and the guy kissed me. I have been trying too apologize and say I messed up and that I love him but he keeps saying “stop” or “i don’t really wanna talk” is there any hope in getting him back with the NC with what I did đ this is the first day we have gone without talking at all since me and him have gotten back together 2 yrs ago.
admin
December 1, 2013 at 6:15 pm
Sure there is hope but don’t be fooled into thinking that it will be easy or that NC is all you have to do.
Emma
December 2, 2013 at 6:53 pm
Ok so can you tell me what else I have too do, you can’t just tell me something and end it saying theres more you have to do and not tell me what it is? Just answer the question please & thanks alot for deleting my cmnts, your suchhhhhh a great help, not.
admin
December 3, 2013 at 7:18 pm
I want to help you really bad trust me but I have to be smart about my time. I can’t write a huge comment b/c there are literally like 300 people wanting to hear back from me.
Tell me what specifically you want to know. If you are more specific it will help me give you more specific advice.
Emma
December 2, 2013 at 4:33 am
I need some steps on what I should do lol
S. H.
November 29, 2013 at 6:06 pm
Does the No Contact rule mean that you block his number and his facebook account?
admin
November 30, 2013 at 4:41 am
No, in fact you can use facebook to your advantage.
Katelyn
November 28, 2013 at 10:06 pm
is it likely for an ex to contact you again even if he isn’t interested in getting back together?
admin
November 29, 2013 at 2:14 am
It can happen for sure.
katelyn
December 1, 2013 at 5:46 am
should i wait for him to initiate contact with me first because HE is the one who broke up with me?
admin
December 1, 2013 at 6:46 pm
No, you initiate it AFTER NC is over.
katelyn
November 28, 2013 at 12:42 am
my ex-boyfriend and i have been broken up for three weeks now. he told me he still loves me but doesn’t see a relationship for us anymore. when we broke up, i told him that we should have no contact so that i can move on and so can he, with hopes that he would change his mind and contact me again within time.
was it a mistake to tell him that we should have no contact? i didn’t want to break up but i didn’t want to fight him against it either. i wanted to look strong and not pathetic. i’m just scared that he really will move on and not contact me and that’s not what i want.
does it make sense to believe that because it was HIM who didn’t want the relationship anymore, that he will contact me IF he still wanted me or his feelings have changed? even if i said no contact?
admin
November 28, 2013 at 5:52 am
I think it is very likely he will contact you if you do NC
katelyn
November 29, 2013 at 5:18 am
i’m just trying to understand this… we broke up and immediately after it happened, he removed me and unfollowed me off of all social networking sites. three days later he added and followed me again.. why?
admin
November 30, 2013 at 4:17 am
Sounds like the normal “I am angry at her” and then a few day slater “I regret doing that.” type of deal.
Tellula
November 27, 2013 at 9:32 am
Hi Chris.
Thanks for the help in the site, it’s really useful.
I have only just found the site so haven’t really used any of the techniques yet. As I’ve only just found it, I haven’t yet done the full 30 day NC. I managed to go 28 days of NC before finding it, and text him on the evening of the 28th.
His responses were very neutral but I didn’t end the conversation (he did!) What do you think I should do? Go for a full 30 day NC? Or do you think 28 days is enough? Or, instead, do you think I should just text him in a week or so but make sure I’m the one to end the conversation?
Thanks for your help,
Tellula
admin
November 27, 2013 at 8:31 pm
I think 28 days is enough to be honest.
Tellula
November 28, 2013 at 10:45 am
Thanks Chris:)
So just contact him again in a week or two but be sure to end the convo first this time?
admin
November 29, 2013 at 1:42 am
Pretty much! haha
Tellula
November 28, 2013 at 10:33 pm
In fact, no need to reply to that! This may sound ridiculous but I think I’ve had a breakthrough this past couple of days. I don’t think I want him back. I need to move on! Just read your ‘getting over your ex’ page and that was very helpful! Thanks Chris!
Karina
November 26, 2013 at 11:25 pm
My boyfriend and I are breaking up after his niece’s birthday as to avoid any awkwardness in the family. We both know that it’s over. He claims that he’s not in a good spot to have a relationship because he doesn’t like the person he is right now and he wants to work on it. He can be selfish, hot tempered, and rude, and he’s really insecure about that. I see him for a gentle, strong, funny person. I still love him with all my heart, and I know he still loves me too, but he definitely needs his space. Is it selfish for me to try to get him back into a relationship? I only want the best for him, but I feel like I could give that to him if he gave me a chance. I really like the idea of the NC because it would give both of a chance to re-evaluate where we stand in our lives and if this is what we need. I still want to be friends with him if all else fails. Any thoughts?
admin
November 27, 2013 at 7:37 pm
Go for NC definitely BUT make sure you are smart about how you text him.
Karina
November 29, 2013 at 6:44 am
What do you mean be smart? Like give him space? Or should I keep fighting for him?
admin
November 30, 2013 at 4:21 am
No like smart in how you approach interacting with him…
Don’t let your emotions run the show so much.
Karina
December 2, 2013 at 6:05 am
What if I don’t trust that he’s not going to hook up with other girls during a month of No Contact?
admin
December 2, 2013 at 7:10 pm
You obviously can’t control him.. But you are just going to have to accept it as a possibility that it could happen and be ok with that possibilty.
jess
November 26, 2013 at 7:14 pm
My ex used to have lots of friends that are girls and i used to always argue with him about it. The one day he told me not to speak to him again because we had lots of arguments but he did actualy speak occasionaly. Then He hadn’t spoken to me in a while after we finished college but one day he seen me then decided to speak to me again and over time we got back together.
I was upset one day and took the anger out on him and told him i want to break up but said sorry the next day. He told me he had enough and he never wants to speak to me again. It’s been a year since he last spoke to me and he never has tried to. Ive tried to but he never replies.
i really love him and have tried not speaking to him for a month then speaking to him again but it doesnt work. Do i no longer have a chance of getting back with him?
admin
November 27, 2013 at 7:08 pm
Well how you speak to him is really important. Was he responding to your texts?
Jenn
November 26, 2013 at 3:32 am
We haven’t spoke for 4 weeks. I attempt to text him and I’ve been blocked! Now what??
Jenn
November 26, 2013 at 8:23 pm
Email. But he obviously doesn’t want me to contact him
admin
November 26, 2013 at 7:51 pm
Are you capable of contacting him in any other way?
Priscila Rebelo
November 25, 2013 at 4:31 pm
What if during the 30 days he finds someone else ? What if he falls in love with someone else ? My ex ignores my messages when the subject is “us” but when it´s something else he replies. What should I do ?
admin
November 25, 2013 at 8:48 pm
Its possible but usually unlikely to happen.
Gabriella
November 23, 2013 at 6:57 pm
Me and my ex had dated for a year and a half. We had a terrible break up I went insane on him. We have been broken up since July and two weeks ago he said to never talk to him again and he meant it. I texted him asking for a ride because it was freezing but I got no response. It’s been 5 months since we haven’t been together is that too long to start the process because I feel I already fucked it up and there’s nothing.
admin
November 24, 2013 at 6:30 pm
When was the last time you talked to him.
Gabriella
November 24, 2013 at 9:03 pm
I talked to him November 9 he said to never talk to him again but I asked him for a ride home because it was freezing and explaining sorry that I didn’t have gas money on the 12 and got no reply
Gabriella
November 24, 2013 at 9:11 pm
I talked to him November 9 he said to never talk to him again but I asked him for a ride home because it was freezing and explaining sorry that I didn’t have gas money on the 12 and got no reply. Could I go for a “GUESS WHAT!!” Instead of the confession? I was told to give it a year then try and talk to him.
admin
November 25, 2013 at 7:26 pm
I think you could.. I do like the guess what confession.
Gabriella
November 24, 2013 at 2:29 pm
Also does this tactic work if he has a girlfriend or does he have to be single?
admin
November 24, 2013 at 8:14 pm
No it can work when he has a gf though whether or not to use is is up to you.
Jill
November 22, 2013 at 5:13 am
I’ve contacted my ex several times over the last two weeks – he has either reacted positively or neutral. I just used the “confession” tactic, causing him to call me multiple times and text, though not responding after I actually mentioned my confession. Do I seem to have a good chance at progressing? Thank you for answering.
admin
November 22, 2013 at 7:43 pm
I think so!
Marie
November 16, 2013 at 10:26 pm
Me and my ex broke up it was a pretty bad ending but not because anyone cheated. Any how he started acting strange towards our future plans and ultimately he broke it off and I devastated. It’s been a month and two weeks sepince we spoke this time and I texted him 6 hrs ago, I have a confession to make and he still hasn’t replied. Even tho he hasn’t replied I still feel a sense of relife but now I’m wondering does he even still love me. We got each other names tattooed on us so why would he just shut down on me like this. Do u think he will ever respond
Lindsey
November 18, 2013 at 1:26 am
He won’t respond. Mine didn’t. The site knows nothing. This is just a guy giving you bad advice. I’ll give you some good though, move on. There are other fish in the sea. Sick of seeing all these women waste their time on this site.
admin
November 18, 2013 at 6:27 pm
Sorry you feel that way Lindsey… good luck to you.
And just because your ex didn’t respond doesn’t mean hers will.
Lindsey
November 18, 2013 at 11:31 pm
Even if your boyfriend does respond, do you really want him back? Step back from the situation for about 6 months and then decide. Funny thing Chris never goes from that angle or have a thread that talks about “maybe you are better off without him”
He isn’t calling because he isn’t interested bottom line. If he was interested he’d call, men are simple beings.
admin
November 19, 2013 at 6:28 pm
Well, I should probably write one about being better off without a boyfriend you are absolutely right. I will do something about that.
admin
November 17, 2013 at 7:22 pm
I think he will respond one day but maybe give him some space.
skye
November 15, 2013 at 8:17 am
I kinda never did the no contact rule. We had a fight several misunderstandings. I pushed so hard to be more. His friend called me and told me not to contact him again. I was confused becsuse we had said we wanted to have a discussion about us. I feel lost and I love him and he hasnt spoken to me in two months. But reads my emails and texts. Please help me I love him more than anything. We never fought other than time issues he never had time. đ
admin
November 15, 2013 at 7:37 pm
You should probably do the NC rule.
Anna
November 14, 2013 at 10:15 pm
I really want us to be on speaking terms again, I want him to regret ending it, it’s wishful thinking though. He told me to leave him alone and we’re not friends anymore, so does that mean I really have to move on, I don’t want too. He’s been so horrible to me and I want to know how to reverse that
admin
November 15, 2013 at 5:46 pm
No it just means you need to be patient.