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581 thoughts on “Decoding The Mixed Signals From Your Ex Boyfriend”

  1. Avatar

    Amy

    August 30, 2018 at 9:04 pm

    Thank you for writing this informative article!
    I’m curious what you think of my situation:
    I dated a guy for almost 5 months before we started a romantic relationship. He was in a non-monogamous relationship with his girlfriend with whom he has a 6-year old child. They seem to be staying together mostly for the child amd have been together 7 years. He seems unsatisfued with his relationship with her. They argue and he doesn’t seem to like having sex with her. They seem to be more like good friends that aren’t really in love anymore.
    Anyway, while we were dating, we became good friends and he made me feel very comfortable during that time. Once we started a romantic relationship I fell pretty deeply in love with him quite quickly. He was still in a relationship with his other girlfriend and she became quite jealous after he expressed that he didn’t really want to keep being intimate with her but wanted to be more like friends that co-parented and lived together. They started to fight more and she got more and more jealous over the 3 months that we were in a romantic relationship. It fell apart after those 3 months because she kept threatening to leave him and take their child away if he didn’t continue a sexual relationship with her. This may sound kinda crazy, I know. But I fell so much in love and I am having trouble getting over him. He keeps contacting me and visiting me even though he broke up with me and returned to monogamy with his girlfriend to “save his family”. He doesn’t want to break up his family because he is worried it will hurt his child.
    It has been about 3 months since we broke up. The last time I saw him (a couple weeks ago) he looked into my eyes for a long time, told me he loved me and started crying saying he doesn’t know what to do. Although I limit my communication and visits with him, he tries to be very affectionate with me when he sees me even though he is now supposed to be in a monogamous relationship with his girlfriend. He asks me if I’m seeing anyone every time he gets a chance. And he has asked me several times if we can get married one day (in a somewhat playful way). He doesn’t seem to want to be with his girlfriend forever but it seems he wants to wait until his daughter is a bit older. He seems confused about what to do.
    I feel I have no choice but to let him go because I don’t know what he wants…

  2. Avatar

    Nancy

    August 18, 2018 at 3:32 am

    Hi,
    I was together with my exboyfriend for a year, we also lived together and it was amazing! I’m not American (he is) so I had to go home for a while to finish my studies. He loved me so much that he even got to learn my native language and wanted to move to Europe with me. A few weeks before my deprature he became depressed and mean.. I knew he was suffering from depression before but honestly I had no idea that it can be this bad. He literally got upset with anything.. and by the time I was about to leave, I just couldn’t wait to take off and leave him behind for a while. I loved him with full of my heart but couldn’t handle him more and he didn’t even let me to help him. After two weeks of being home he started to call me less often and we got to the point when a whole day passed without talking. I called and told him that this will not work in a long term and asked him if he wanted to break up. He said no and asked me to try to figure things out. Everything was fine for a day and then 2 days later he shot me a super long message about how much he loves me but he has to let me go blablablababla. I only replied: I’m really sorry to hear this. Take care!
    And that’s it.. we went into no contact for 8 months!!!! None of us messaged the other. I was told by my friends that he was seen crying a lot at work after the breakup and he was even asking about me months after we seperated but never contaceted until my birthday when out of the blue he messaged me. I was pissed so I was kinda short with him and we didnt even have a conversation. I was coming back to the US and probably he already knew that. When I got back I bought a car that didnt want to start the next day and I had no idea what to do so I contacted him. I only dared bc he messaged me for my birthday. So all in all, he came over within 30 min and was working on my car the entire day. We had lunch together, he took me home and also wanted me to greet his parents.. He told me that I’m so special and that he still have serious feelings for me.. He even called me babe (as he used to) by accident. It felt like I haven’t even left and we didn’t even break up…. He was super kind and helpful, found a good mechanic for me and we kept in touch and met up a couple of times after that.. He took some stuff from my hood „by accident” so we had to meet up again, when „by accident” he left his car and home keys in my car.. he also tried to find a reason to message me with random stuff and when we hung out he told me that he was going to a class I’d love and I should join him. Also told me that the next time I go to the movies I should invite him blablablaba stuff like that but never asked me out for a real date. I wanted him to fight for me since it was him who messed it up. I got pissed and became distant so he became. Whenever he texted me, he made me talk a lot, asked me to teach him more Hungarian, more about our history, etc. One time he messaged me a 200 year old poem 😀 and asked me to translate it (wtf??) and whenever we got deep into the conversation he just disappeared.. Even if it was him who initiated contact.. I didn’t understand what was going on so I went in no contact for a month and then I messaged him and asked if he wanted to grab a coffe with me. He sounded super excited and told me that he’s looking forward to set a time. I replied him 4 minutes later and he never read my message since then… It’s been a month. He literally hasn’t read my message and it’s been a month………
    I don’t know what to think or do. Should I just let him go?
    He is the love of my life and we had a great relationship besides the last few weeks of it.
    I stayed in touch with his mom during the breakup, sometimes she messaged me and when I moved back to the US she got super excited and she even invited me over to her birthday party (of course I didnt attend since I didnt get back together with her son) but I had the feeling that she knew how his son felt and wanted us to get back together.
    Also when I moved back I got multiple friends telling me that my ex was telling them how much he still loved and missed me and that I was the most perfect woman for him. I was shocked but full of hope and now I have no idea what”s going on..
    I started dating and instead of moving on I just kept comparing the guys to my ex . It got so bad that I came home crying after the last date I had.

    I just have no idea what to do. Should I just wait until he reaches out?
    Thanks for your answer in advance!

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 19, 2018 at 12:46 am

      Hi Nancy….that is quite story. Wow….a 200 year poem. Looks to me he was trying to get a gauge of your feelings. I think your focus should be on you and your healing and recovery. You can move on without leaving him behind if in the event he surfaces again. Of course then, you may have a different perspective. And you can do things to reinforce your value from afar as ex boyfriends will often keep tabs on their ex girlfriends. But keep your focus on being the best “you”. He may be blowing it with you, but you can’t control his every decision and you shouldnt have to wait for him and his fickle ways.

  3. Avatar

    Anonymous

    May 12, 2018 at 9:25 pm

    My ex bf broke up with me 4 months ago after being together for only a few months. We did the no contact rule. A couple weeks ago he said he missed me and asked to hangout to talk and maybe get a fresh start on things, he even text me for a whole week calling me beautiful and hun. After we hung out I didn’t hear from, so I let a few days go by and I still didn’t hear from him . I texted my best friend who is dating his brother and I found out through her that he was just leading me on because he knows I still have feelings for him and he doesn’t see us getting back together. He said he wants to hangout once in awhile and just be friends, but I want to get back together with him in the future. How do I stop him from leading me on again? How do I get him to want me back for good?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 12, 2018 at 10:53 pm

      Hi there…thanks for stopping by! I am sorry your ex is not playing it straight with you. It could be he is still in the undecided mode as to how he wishes to proceed and is just keeping his options open. It may be in your best interest to employ NC again, but utilize some of the methods I teach to increase your value in his eyes. You might want to take a deeper dive into a Blueprint I devised that can help you with your needs. To learn more about some of the products I created, go to my website’s Menu Section and click on the link for “Products”. I think you will find some useful resources there that will help you with your situation!

  4. Avatar

    Janine

    May 4, 2018 at 4:32 pm

    Hi Chris, my ex and I broke up in October. We recently had our first meeting, it went well. He has mentioned that he would want to see me again but we havent chose a date yet because we are in 2 different cities during the summer, he let me he would come visit in May and would like if he could see me. Anyways, sometimes he is pretty flirty, talked about our past tris together.. how much fun he used to have with me.. missed me all very recent via text, texted me a lot after the meeting, wanted to see me soon after… which makes me think the chances of getting back are really god but yesterday we were talking about a old teacher who liked us as a couple and I just ended up saying something like : Ill go visit that “x” teacher when am engaged, he’d be happy to know who got me. (I wasn’t trying to make him think of marriage at all). My ex said ” who got you huh, the lucky guy who got you” and rushed saying goodnight. I told him “is that a question ” ? ( I didn’t understand)… he then said “I don’t think it’s a question”. I told him I dont understand, how’s that a fact. He simply said ” lol Are you trying to get into my head?”
    I said : ” I’m just trying to understand your texting” he replied : Maybe we shouldn’t be texting about these things like that.” ” So we can make sure we both understand each other” I said : “hum ok” (curious, confused, and worried) He then added: “I mean you know how bad it is to text about feelings and stuff, so id rather not” I said : ok goodnight. He said okay Janine good night & that was the end of our conversation. I feel bothered somehow and confused, I think it is best indeed to talk about those things in person but somehow I feel like his reasons are not the same as mines to do so, maybe he doesn’t want to talk about feelings at all i have no idea… Do you have an idea of what”s going on in his head..and if he is not sure about me or doesn’t know what he wants.. What should I do after this to improve my chances of getting him back. Thank you

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 4, 2018 at 9:33 pm

      Hi Janine..i think he is right about how texting does not always reflect one’s feelings accurately. It seems he is testing your feelings and views of where the relationship is. You have my ebook (“Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro”), right? IF not, go check it out because it well help you now and down the road. Just go slow and continue to build attraction thru some of the tactics I talk about. You should also consider joining my Private Facebook Support Group Community. The women who are part of that Group do a lot of sharing and offering of support and ideas. I also do weekly live Facebook webcast for this Group. You can learn more at my website Menu/Products link!

    2. Avatar

      Janine

      May 4, 2018 at 10:12 pm

      Hi Chris, thank you for your reply. So if he is testing my feelings and views on where the relationship is, that’s a good thing right? It’s another way for him to show interest…I just have to be careful at not scaring him off if I understand correctly and do you have a part in particular that I should focus more in the recovery PRO ?
      Thank you!

    3. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 5, 2018 at 4:25 am

      I think it is a positive development. Pro is a huge book and sometimes it takes a couple of reads to process it all. Just think of it as your Companion Guide
      and apply the section that coincides with your needs in the stage you are in.

  5. Avatar

    Angela

    April 30, 2018 at 2:26 pm

    Hi, my ex and I have been broken up for about a month now and 2 of those weeks I actually did no contact. He asked to meet at the airport during his layover last Saturday to touch base as things have been really chaotic between us (I made all the mistakes of crying and begging and blowing up his phone to a point where he blocked me). We had limited time to talk (about 35 minutes) and it was rather calm. I decided to see if I could do physical contact and ended up holding his him and linking his arm, which he didn’t push off. At one point he even gave me a kiss on the forehead, said that there were days where he woke up and thought what the heck did he do. But he said he needed time for awhile to himself and sort out his finances and get his life back on track and that the past couple months, the relationship felt suffocating. He turned down my offer to see him for the summer but said he would maybe come visit me further down the road or plan a vacation together. He asked then if I would like to see him again during his layover flying back home to which I said we will see. Gave me a really tight goodbye hug as he goes through security and today he has started unblocking me and following me back on social media. I am so confused. Do I have any hope?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 30, 2018 at 3:09 pm

      I Angela…I talk to a lot of Angelas here, so forgive if I mentioned this,but you would benefit if you picked up my ebook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” (available at my website Menu/click Products link). Its is chalked full of tactics and steps on what you can do to better your chances. Confusion and hopelessness is normal when people go through breakups. It is important to experience some self recovery, before you can expect to get your ex back. You can learn so much about this and other thing, so go take a look at some of the resources and services I discuss on my Products Page. You may find one or two things that fits your needs. Feel free to check back here anytime!

  6. Avatar

    Cece

    March 24, 2018 at 9:52 pm

    HI,
    I had posted in another post about a month ago. My ex and I officially broke up feb 15. Twice (4 days and 21 days post breakup) my ex boyfriend reached out telling me that he regrets breaking up with me and throwing away something so good. Yet both times, he changed his mind the next day because he has doubts and is confused about us. He says he loves me now but he’s unsure about the future (if we stay together, we may have to do long distance in the near future). He says he’s struggling internally with this decision but he’s also extremely stressed out in being in a professional college. The reason why he broke up with me is because he said that near the end of our relationship, it felt like work on top of an already hectic school schedule. I was completely blindsided by the breakup because he never expressed this to me. I did and will continue NC, have focused on working on myself, posting on social media and becoming the UG. I plan on going on NC for around 45 days because I will see him at a research conference around that time and plan to open communication there. My question is, how should I act around him when I see him since this will be our first time meeting each other since 21 day post breakup? Also, how do I convince him that our relationship is worth fighting for? Thanks!

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 3, 2018 at 1:11 am

      Generally I like to tell people to act like nothing is wrong or nothing is bothering them.

      As for convincing him. My guess is that it’ll take more than a conversation to do but that’s why we have a whole process.

    2. Avatar

      Cece

      April 6, 2018 at 3:03 pm

      Do you think it would be better if I reached out to him before this conference? After 30 days NC of course. Just to open up the lines of communication. Or will I have a higher chance if I wait another month until I see him in person? My biggest fear is that he will start to lose feelings/forget about me. Which I know it’s unlikely but I know he’s on tinder now…

    3. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 7, 2018 at 4:58 am

      I hate putting a time constraint on things. It often ruins perfectly good game plans. I think you build everything up towards seeing him in person.

    4. Avatar

      Cece

      April 26, 2018 at 3:17 pm

      Hi Chris,
      So I’ve decided that to wait to see him in person to open up my lines of communication with him. My next questions is how do I implement tide theory into texting him after I see him? Should my first text to him after our “bump in” be what you define as the typical “first contact text” or should it be more casual like “hey it was nice bumping into you the other day?”. Also, do I wait the full day like you said in your book before I text him or should I just text him on day 2?
      PS. your ERB pro has been more than helpful! I just want more insight into my specific situation 🙂

    5. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 26, 2018 at 9:39 pm

      As you would expect, my views on the steps you take are very adaptable to each person’s unique situation. I like your text suggestion. It works to build a little connection….is friendly, but not pushy are demanding. Wait some time…doesn’t have to be a full day..before reaching out. The idea is not come off as too dependent. You want to be viewed as independent…fun…happy…positive…beautiful….just someone everybody wants to be around

    6. Avatar

      Cece

      April 29, 2018 at 1:08 am

      Thank you so much for the advice! So there has been a slight change of plans. My ex posted something on his snapchat story Thursday night that was specifically for me (inside joke between us) and I instantly replied to it because I had the confidence to, my gut instinct told me to, I had a very funny and witty reply to it and guess what, it worked! He immediately replied positively, we chatted for a bit and I ended the conversation on a high note by not replying! He posted another snapchat story last night and the exact same situation happened. Both times, I’ve initiated conversation and received a positively response! I just checked snapchat and he just posted another snapchat story but I haven’t opened it yet. This is also out of the blue for him because he VERY RARELY posts on his snapchat story. However, I am someone who posts relatively frequently (so he can see me as the UG ;P), and I posted something on my story today in reference to something we did together in the past, but he looked at it and didn’t initiate conversation… My question to you is, the next time he posts on his story, should I initiation conversation or should I wait a bit? I’m not sure if I interpreted this correctly but in your ERBpro (pg 204) you said that after three chances, if he doesn’t reach out, its time to move on?

    7. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      April 29, 2018 at 5:04 am

      Hi Cece….yes….wait a little spell. Remember, you want to build value and attraction slowly over time…like laying down little breadcrumbs for him to pick up and follow after you. If you get flat out rejected in a harsh way 3 times, then one should probably pull up their roots and move on. But that’s not whats happening her. You are getting bites. He is responding to your breadcrumbs. It wont necessarily happen every time, but you can build in some curiosities and other psychological tactics into your Snapchat Stories (use of brief little video vignettes can be very effective). Good job Cece. Forgive me, as I can remember if I told you, but if you need additional support, check out my Private Facebook Support Group…the ladies there are awesome in sharing ideas.

    8. Avatar

      Cece

      May 4, 2018 at 4:03 am

      Hi Chris, here’s my update! My ex has since started to initiate snapchatting me – some personal snaps sent only to me, some of them sent to me and posted to his story. According to my texting chart, I initiate 2/3 times. One day I even ended the convo on a high note by not replying and he snapped an hour later to keep the convo going! He replies to all my snaps relatively positively and I’ve been building rapport, not quite at the attraction text yet. However, today was the research day and our interaction was very short and awkward. I looked really good, was polite, happy, confident, and a little awkward because I naturally am haha. However, he was quite uncomfortable and didn’t seem all that happy to see me. Throughout the day, he kept avoiding me! A bunch of his classmates kept coming by to say hi to me but he never made the effort to come talk to me. I would have approached him if I wasn’t stuck at my poster the entire day. I feel like I’m in the movie 500 days of summer in that expectation vs. reality scene where I expected so much more from this research day but in reality, nothing came of it. Now that the day is over, he hasn’t snapped me yet and he usually snaps me sometime in the evening. I’m a little confused as to what to do now? Should I acknowledge the fact that we saw each other or just continue with the texting like nothing happened? Also, when should I reach out? Thanks again 🙂

      PS. I deactivated facebook until I finish writing my thesis.. I was getting too distracted 🙁 Or else I totally would have joined the group!

    9. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 4, 2018 at 4:00 pm

      Hi Cece…I love that movie….It is so insightful. I want you to watch it again. It will help underscore that even if this relationship doesn’t workout in the way your desire, there is always upside opportunities. Because remember, your are a pretty special and determined woman and he should be so lucky to have you in his life. Sometimes a guy will come to realize they are blowing it and turn the corner. But sometimes there are other things going on in their mind, for which you can’t change or influence in any quick way. So stay the course with your plan and maybe be a bit more like the “ungettable girl”. Let him come to you and keep being your amazing and beautiful self.

    10. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 4, 2018 at 4:00 pm

      Hi Cece…I love that movie….It is so insightful. I want you to watch it again. It will help underscore that even if this relationship doesn’t workout in the way your desire, there is always upside opportunities. Because remember, your are a pretty special and determined woman and he should be so lucky to have you in his life. Sometimes a guy will come to realize they are blowing it and turn the corner. But sometimes there are other things going on in their mind, for which you can’t change or influence in any quick way. So stay the course with your plan and maybe be a bit more like the “ungettable girl”. Let him come to you and keep being your amazing and beautiful self.

  7. Avatar

    Feliz

    March 15, 2018 at 8:52 pm

    Im doing it , i didn’t message him anymore , the last time i thought it would be ok , but he didnt message , and i didnt message too, he talks like he wants and doesnt want at the same time , u think nc rule will help?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 16, 2018 at 3:17 pm

      Yes, because continuing to talk to him will make you look like you’re chasing.

  8. Avatar

    Feliz

    March 15, 2018 at 12:42 pm

    Hi, i and my bf broke up for a not serious problem , and he started to say that its good for us to break up , i tried a bit not to do it but it happened , after that he messaged on a post of mine and we started to chat for an hour , he said that he wants us but he knows it wouldn’t work , and i tried to make him say that he can be together again but he said that yet we are broken up till he knows what to do , and after me telling him to be good with me , he said that he hopes it happen but he thinks it wont work, and again he didn’t message me after that. It was a 3 yrs relationship and the breaking up happened 1 week ago . I dont know what to do and what he means

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 15, 2018 at 5:41 pm

      Hi Feliz
      Do you want to try the nc rule?

  9. Avatar

    Leyla

    March 14, 2018 at 1:07 am

    Hey. My boyfriend broke up with me a month ago after saying he wanted to go on a break. He was my best friend and in November said that he thought we were going to get married. When he broke up with me, he said that right now he couldn’t be with me and that it was the best decision for him. He then went on to say that he thought the spark between us might reignite when we saw each other in the summer. We didn’t really speak for two weeks, and then he started messaging me about random stuff, and I haven’t messaged him first at all. This stuff included sending me his most recent music playlists and asking me what songs I liked on them and asking me about outfit advice. I saw him in person for the first time today since the break up and he touched my face affectionately. What does this all mean? Is he regretting his decision? Is he friend-zoning me?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 15, 2018 at 2:25 pm

      Hi Leyla,

      That’s too vague to say what he’s really up to.. But you should follow this one:
      What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Wants To Stay Friends

  10. Avatar

    Jessica

    February 5, 2018 at 1:27 pm

    Hi my ex broke up with me 2 weeks ago out of the blue when he suddenly said that our expectations were mismatched and he cannot see a future at this point. that obviously broke my heart and i sent him a goodbye text 2 days later to which he replied to. i decided to initiate no contact to help with the healing when a week into.it he suddenly texted saying he saw something on YouTube and thought of me ( the links were relevant tp an important passion of mine. after i thankwd him for the links there was no.reply.

    i was wondering what kind of text this would be and why he would send something like that. any idea of how to proceed

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 8, 2018 at 11:36 am

      Hi Jessica,

      You need to restart the count because you replied.. That’s common for an ex because even if he broke up with you, doesn’t mean he is not used to talking to you.

  11. Avatar

    S'LEX

    January 10, 2018 at 2:53 am

    Hello,
    My name is S’Lex. My boyfriend and I dated each other for 3yrs with 2 yrs of him trying to get me prior to our relationship (i was just gettung out of relationship) but we went on dates talked on the pgine but had fall outz longest being 8 months until we finally made it official then we went 3 yrs straight. We broke up 4 months ago had a big fight (no one cheated) but there were issues we had.. So while we have broken up wehave not talked as much. In the relatuonship whenever we would get in an arguement i would alwayz be the obe crawling back. After this break up i we were at first for the 1st month and a half trying to work tgungs out but i saw i was the only one putting efforts so i told him that i am walking away completely and if its meant to be we will be (hardest decision b/c i love him so much) after all ge id the one that initiated the break up. So after the break up he started talking to his ex from 7 yrs ago and they had sex.. i also had sex with an ex but it actually meant nothing to me. He has contacted and told me he misses me he even started hanging out with my little brother everyday going to the gym and was telling my brother great things but acting completely different with me (mixed signals) was coming over my house while i was at work. This has stopped he blocked me on facebook but i had already deleted him as my friend the 1st week we broke up but he actually blocked me i think around new years day. So the other night he called me (late) (oh yeah i did no contact none of that shit worked( i think it back fired anyways he called me late i did not answet it was too late so i called him two days later and he didnt pick up so then he called me back two days later which was today so i pick up so hes like did you call me? I yold him i was returning his phine call but he acted like he didnt remember so he then says to his boss because he was at work (shes pretty as fuck you have to keep her) i guess he was then i asked him did he need anything he took that as me being jealous of what he said ti his boss then he was explaining to me he was talking to his boss about his girl…. i was not jealous at all i said is there anything you need he thought i was rushing him off the phone he saif i just wanted to see how you are doing i told him i was good. He told me a customer was coming in and that he would call back.. he dudnt call i am not chasing him but i miss him, What do i do?!

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 11, 2018 at 5:03 pm

      Hi S’lex,

      how long did and what did you do during nc? And how did it back fire?

  12. Avatar

    S'LEX

    January 10, 2018 at 2:50 am

    Hello,
    My name is S’Lex. My boyfriend and I dated each other for 3yrs with 2 yrs of him trying to get me prior to our relationship (i was just gettung out of relationship) but we went on dates talked on the pgine but had fall outz longest being 8 months until we finally made it official then we went 3 yrs straight. We broke up 4 months ago had a big fight (no one cheated) but there were issues we had.. So while we have broken up wehave not talked as much. In the relatuonship whenever we would get in an arguement i would alwayz be the obe crawling back. After this break up i we were at first for the 1st month and a half trying to work tgungs out but i saw i was the only one putting efforts so i told him that i am walking away completely and if its meant to be we will be (hardest decision b/c i love him so much) after all ge id the one that initiated the break up. So after the break up he started talking to his ex from 7 yrs ago and they had sex.. i also had sex with an ex but it actually meant nothing to me. He has contacted and told me he misses me he even started hanging out with my little brother everyday going to the gym and was telling my brother great things but acting completely different with me (mixed signals) was coming over my house while i was at work. This has stopped he blocked me on facebook but i had already deleted him as my friend the 1st week we broke up but he actually blocked me i think around new years day. So the other night he called me (late) (oh yeah i did no contact none of that shit worked( i think it back fired anyways he called me late i did not answet it was too late so i called him two days later and he didnt pick up so then he called me back two days later which was today so i pick up so hes like did you call me? I yold him i was returning his phine call but he acted like he didnt remember so he then says to his boss because he was at work (shes pretty as fuck you have to keep her) i guess he was then i asked him did he need anything he took that as me being jealous of what he said ti his boss then he was explaining to me he was talking to his boss about his girl…. i was not jealous at all i said is there anything you need he thought i was rushing him off the phone he saif i just wanted to see how you are doing i told him i was good. He told me a customer was coming in and that he would call back.. he dudnt call i am not chasing him but i miss him, What do i do?

  13. Avatar

    Nichole

    January 3, 2018 at 3:32 pm

    My boyfriend broke up with me on Christmas Eve. We’ve had a rough relationship of me being very insecure and always questioning him. He couldn’t take it anymore and left. We have a child together and I’m pregnant again. He said he wanted space and time to figure out what he wants to do, if he wants to try again or not. When he left I begged and cried and blew his phone up. Didn’t get me anywhere obviously. So I’ve left him alone and he messaged me last night about our son. I asked him what’s up with us. I needed to know something. And he said he told himself he wasn’t going to do this again but then he says he doesn’t just want to walk away from it, and he still doesn’t know what to do. How can I bring him back to me. He is a stubborn ex. He’s been through this before with his ex of 10 years and 3 children together. He said he would never do it again. He said we’re all the same and we don’t change. I’ve never been the girl I was with him. I was always laid back and cool and fun. Then I got insecure and crazy around the time I got pregnant. I need to show him I’m changing and I need to get him back. I don’t have time for 30+ days no contact and all that. We’re supposed to get a place together at tax time. I need something asap. Thanks.

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      EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 5, 2018 at 9:29 pm

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    Magdalena A Garcia

    January 2, 2018 at 5:11 am

    My ex and I were in an on again off again relationship for 2 or 3 years. Every time we break up, we go a few days or a few weeks without speaking. This last time, I wanted things to be over so I did no contact for 3 weeks. Then I left a voicemail asking for something I left at his house. He did not call back and instead had his cousin bring over a bag of my things. This included gifts I had given him. I felt like it was a slap in the face. I texted him about how hurt I was and he responded by denying that he returned gifts and inviting me over. This was on New Year’s Eve. I told him I needed space and that I needed to continue working on myself. Then, I contacted him today because I was confused about him returning my things and asking me to go over on the same day. He said he would call me back and he never did.

    Every time we go our separate ways, he invites me to hang out but only after I’ve initiated contact. He rarely initiates anything. I sent him a series of texts basically saying that our relationship cannot continue this way. Either we both work on ourselves so that we can be in a healthy relationship or I do not want him inviting me over because our volatile cycle is stunting my progress and growth. He hasn’t responded.

    He makes me feel like he just wants to use me when it’s convenient for him. He always invites me over and we just hang out in his room. We fight so much and he never got anger management when he said he was going to or any of the other things he has said.

    I’m not sure if I responded in the right way but I thought, it’s better to be honest and put my feelings out there than to be afraid all the time like he is.

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    LeLe

    November 13, 2017 at 5:14 pm

    My boyfriend of 11/2just broke up with me and I just moved in w him 2 months ago. Things are awkward because I basically am styck living w him until I van save $ to move. He basically said he doesnt see a future w me ect.. Ect. Its been 3 weeks and he out of blue said he wanted to cuddle.. I was confused but I did cuddle w him obviously I missed him and he cuddles me and kissed my cheek. But in the next breath says nothing has changed. We are stillbroke up. I just simply said yes I know. Even tho i was thinking wtf!!?? He def said he wants to be my “friend” but I told him no lol not sure what is happening.. Please help

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      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 17, 2017 at 8:18 pm

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    Ashley

    November 5, 2017 at 4:25 pm

    I’m not a huge “poster” on social media but recently it’s been about 4-5 days and I make sure that it’s positive and not about drinking or partying. I’m still continuing to work on myself… working out, etc. What should I be doing from here? I haven’t contacted him since I didn’t hear back from him, that was last Wednesday. How long do I wait before reaching out again? What type of message should I send?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 6, 2017 at 7:51 pm

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    Ashley

    November 4, 2017 at 7:43 pm

    We broke up almost 2 months ago, we only dated for a month and a half. The reason for the breakup was a too much too fast and I freaked out a little bit about his ex girlfriend texting him constantly. I heard for short term relationships it’s best to keep the flame alive, so I only did no contact for a week and a half.

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      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 5, 2017 at 6:53 am

      Yeah, that’s probably the length I would advise you too but how much did you improve yourself and how active were you in posting? And are you still doing that? And asking him to dinner, is too forward for now.. He’s giving you mixed signals because yes he does miss you, but it doesn’t mean he wants to get back together.

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    Jena

    November 4, 2017 at 1:41 pm

    My ex and i are trying to work on some type of anrelationship. We are going to counseling, but confusing bc he says there’s no pressure and just taking things day by day. Meaning he wont say he wants a boyfriend vs friend ending. He continues to communicate daily but it’s inconsistent. Some days it’s all day and sometimes he will ghost for 4-5 hours. Tells me details of his life one day and next tells me l don’t have a right to ask or gives vague responses. He also used to pay attention to details and now i am the one who does that. At the same time he now invites me over to hang out more and even attend school functions with his kids but then days later takes a road trip and doesn’t tell me until 12 hours later. It’s all very confusing. Help…,

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      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 5, 2017 at 6:37 am

      Hi Jena,

      what kind of counseling are you both going to? If it’s a couple’s counseling for a relationship, is it clear to him that it’s that? Because it looks like he has already friendzoned you.

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    Ashley

    November 4, 2017 at 12:27 am

    My ex and I were texting and flirting last week. He even said “I wish you were here” because he was on vacation. Then he suddenly stopped texting. I asked him to dinner this week and he replied he was slammed at work so I asked about the weekend and he didn’t reply. He always replies to my texts… why could he be giving me mixed signals? I’m so confused because he was so great last week.

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      EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 4, 2017 at 1:16 am

      Hi Ashley,

      when and why did you break up? How long was the relationship and have you done the no contact rule? If yes, how long?

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    Nana

    October 29, 2017 at 3:14 pm

    Hello, i want a piece of advice please.
    My ex-boyfriend tries to come back in my life. We broke up because he cheated on me. First, he texted me to know how I am doing. I answered normally. He said he wants to call me, he asked a lot of questions about my life. I was okay with it. Recently he asked me a favor, to promote his business. We are not friends and this is not my job.The man knows so many people. According to me, the guy is extra ! What do you think please ?

    1. Avatar

      EBR Team Member: Amor

      October 31, 2017 at 9:28 pm

      Hi Nana,

      If you dont want to, there’s nothing wrong not doing it..

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