By Chris Seiter

Updated on February 24th, 2021

So, you have your eye on a particular guy and you just want to know how to make him fall for you. Well, making him fall is not going to be as easy as just sticking out your foot and tripping him. But knowing how your target’s mind works can be an advantage. I am here to provide a window into his mind and let you know what you’re working with.

So, let’s talk about what factors play into how a guy decides if he likes you in the first place:

  1. Similarities
  2. Familiarity
  3. Desirability
  4. Reciprocity
  5. Social Influence
  6. Fulfillment
  7. Physical Features
  8. Timing
  9. Mystery


It’s natural to gravitate towards people that reflect what we see in ourselves, things that reinforce the way we see the world. Having commonalities with a guy definitely impacts how he sees you; for example liking the same things or having similar views on things that are meaningful to him, like sports, family, politics, religion, or something like that.

To be clear, I’m not saying you should pretend to be someone you aren’t. What I am saying is that you should play up similarities that come to you naturally.

A good way to use this information is to lean into one of his interests that he is knowledgeable about and that you are actually interested in learning. This not only gives you the opportunity to ask him to explain something to you, it also opens the door for you to have follow up conversations and ultimately he will want to talk to you more because you’ve pointed out a similarity.

Have you ever seen the movie “Failure to Launch?”  It’s a movie about guys who still live at home with their parents and a woman who basically “rehabilitates” them.

Here is what she had to say about her services:

“Young men develop self-esteem best during a romantic relationship, so I simulate one: We have a memorable meeting, we get to know each other over a few casual meals, he helps me through an emotional crisis, then I meet his friends – if he has any – uh, then I let him teach me something; but, the bottom line is, he bonds with me, he lets go of you, he moves out.”

Letting him teach you something will make him feel like he’s invested time into the relationship with you. This will give you something in common.

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Studies have shown that we are attracted to what is familiar to us.

Simply put, the more exposure we have to someone, the more we will want to be around them.

This attraction is something we don’t normally notice because it is something that happens gradually over time.

The more time we spend around someone, the more our subconscious considers them safe and less likely to hurt us.

Fun fact, this is why we gravitate to people who remind us of a parent or someone we were close to in the past. Even if the behavior that makes them similar is negative, it is something familiar. It makes us feel like we can predict their future behavior.

So, how does this fit into making someone fall for you?

Well, you can create a sense of safety with you simply be being around. Sounds easy right? well, like everything else we talk about this has to be done carefully. Simply making yourself a constant part of his life isn’t as easy as it seems. Having you suddenly around all the time could come off as a heavy handed pursuit. You don’t want that.

Why don’t you want that?

Well, not one wants something they can get easily, especially men. We like a challenge.

So in order to become a familiar face, make friends with people in his inner circle. Add yourself to his life gradually.

You’ll know it’s working when he starts to invite you to be around either more often or one-on-one.


Desire is not a word you here men say often these days. But it doesn’t mean that they don’t understand the concept.

Desire is one of the biggest motivators there is. We all have an image in our mind of what we want out of life and we all have a picture of that life somewhere in our subconscious. That being said, we tend to gravitate toward the people we think will facilitate the chances of actually getting what we want out of life.

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Most people think they can spur desire in a man just by being hot. And yeah, that could create a temporary type of desire called lust. But remember, our goal here today is to make a man fall for you. If you want that to last more than a short while, then you have to focus on more than just physical desire.

This requires a bit of detective work.

Find out what he wants out of life. Does he have ambitious goals? is he wanting to achieve something physically?

If so, you need to set yourself up in his mind that will support him in his goals, even inspire him to chase them harder.

Then, you will add in the lust-factor.

We’ll talk more about the lust-factor later, but I will say that they have to go hand in hand. A guy will jump at the chance to have a pretty girl on his arm, but how long will he want her around if he she doesn’t add value to his life?

So let’s dive in further.

How does a relationship add value to someone’s life?

Equal Footing – It’s not uncommon for people to rank potential partners on a scale of 10. You have to be a 10 and make him feel like a 10 at the same time. Every guy wants a girl who’s out of his league, but he’ll be intimidated if she is too far out of his league. Find balance.

Facing Weakness – If he confides in you and tells you a weakness he struggles with, support him in working to overcome them, Be there for him to lean on when he needs you to.

Goal Chasing – It’s easier to chase your goals when the person you are with is chasing their own. Chase your own goals and lead by example.

Bring out the Best – most of the time the idea of adding value makes people think they have to play a mothering role or that they should dictate how he should live his life. The reality is, you just have to live your life parallel to his and be your best self. This is why he’ll value you.

The more he values you, the more he’ll desire you.


In any relationship, friendships, relationships, pre-relationships, there’s always going to be an imbalance. Someone will be more invested than the other.

Once you notice that he is falling for you, you can’t just back off and stop showing interest.

He has to know that you are still into him.

Don’t stop showing effort just because you see the finish line.

Would you want to be with someone who stopped trying the second you showed interest?

Show appreciation for the things he does for you. that’s the easiest way to do this. Be grateful for every effort he puts in.

Social Influence

How does this guys friend’s feel about you?

Do they like you?

Do they think you’re a 10?

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Do they invite you to come around?

We all care what our friends think, even if we wish we didn’t.

Men are 10 times more likely to find someone attractive if other guys find her attractive. They are even more likely to find her attractive if his friends find her attractive.

Why is that, you ask?

Well, we all want our friends to see us a certain way, certainly not less cool than they are. Most guys won’t pass up the chance to have their friends be envious of their relationship.

Having his friends think you are awesome is never a bad thing.

We all care about how we are seen by the people we consider closest to us.


We kind of touched on this already, but every single person has a picture in their head of the way their life is supposed to turn out.

But we only touched on it in the sense that you should be the kind of partner that would help him reach his goals.

When I talk about fulfillment I mean that you need to learn to anticipate what his dream for his life is. If you are serious about getting him to fall for you then your view of what your dream for your life is likely similar to his.

So I ask you this; how does he see you?

Does the woman he sees when he looks at you line up with his dreams?

By choosing to be with you will he be lining up those dreams?

Physical Features

This one is obvious. Play up the features he obviously finds attractive.

If you keep finding him staring at your eyes, learn some tricks to emphasize your eyes.

If he keeps checking out your butt, do some squats and wear clothes that show it off.

If he tends to date girls that are more the “housewife” type, then leaning into your more maternal characteristics might work in your favor.

I’m not telling you to change.

Just pay attention to your appearance, it’s as easy as that, even when you’re just being comfortable.

One of the most attractive things in a woman is the fact that she cares.

Men are driven by visual stimulation.

What Are Your Chances of Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back?

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This is where the lust-factor we talked about earlier comes in.

You don’t have to be a model or a cross-fit warrior. You just have to take care of yourself, pay attention, and embody confidence. That’s the short of it all.


If you want a guy to fall for you, you have to learn how to pay attention to timing.

Is he ready to fall?

Is he still hung up on someone else?

Is he going through something difficult at the moment?

I mean they say “Timing is everything,” right?

Yeah, lucky in love is a thing. Sometimes things just happen to work out.

Is there a trick to mastering timing?

The honest answer is… no.

There is no mastering timing.

But you can be mindful of what’s going on in his life.

“You don’t have to swing hard to hit a home run. If you got the timing, it’ll go.” -Yogi Berra

Have you ever been driving and you see a red light from a distance and you know that, if you slow down just a little, it’ll be green by the time you reach? Or even if you speed up a little and you skate through a red light.

Making a man fall in love is just like that.

Keep an eye out for moments when you should brake a little and moments when you should give it some gas.

Just pay attention and adjust your speed accordingly.


What makes a woman mysterious? That is a big question.

A lot of things can lend to a woman being mysterious.

First of all, forced mystery just comes across as creepy and trying too hard. It comes across like you have an agenda.

There’s this show out right now and the couple in it splits up.

After they split up he goes to check on her various social media pages and finds all of them temporarily shut down,

“What the Hell?! No! NO! NO! Where the hell did you go?! How Am I supposed to be okay with you being gone if you are actually gone?!”

This is exactly how the mind works after a breakup.

There is a LOT of mystery in just disappearing. There is a happy little medium of mystery and that involves not leaving every single detail of your life just out for everyone to see.

So, number 1, if you want to get the guy to fall, you should stop explaining yourself.

Say you were out of town, don’t feel the need to tell everyone why you were out of town.

Just stop telling everybody everything all of the time. Think of your conversations and social media as a highlight reel only.

Only people that are in your life on an intimate level get to hear the details.

Number 2, is a short and easy one. Fix your posture. stand upright and stop crossing your arms. You want to appear open and not closed off. So, set your shoulders back and walk tall.

Number 3, Most people hear the phrase “be more mysterious” and they think I am telling them to be cold and rude. But what I am really saying is that you should take a sincere interest in people. Work on your social skills and play it up.

Number 4, don’t be a yes-woman. You know what I mean. Stop saying yes to everything. Learn to say no. Only do the things you want to do. Don’t play games with people, just say no.

Number 5, do exciting things that you enjoy. Go on adventures. Live an  active life. There is nothing more interesting that a person that lives an interesting life.

Being mysterious doesn’t have to be super difficult. Just enjoy life and be confident in who you are and what you want.

Let’s Wrap This Up

Okay, so what have we learned today?

Let’s review.

  1. Similarities – Play up commonalities between the two of you.
  2. Familiarity – Be there, maximize your exposure.
  3. Desirability – Play into his desires, both physically and emotionally. Learn how to add value to his life.
  4. Reciprocity – Your affection shouldn’t waver. Show appreciation for the things he does.
  5. Social Influence – Make friends with his inner circle. Win them over, win him over.
  6. Fulfillment – Become the dream girl.
  7. Physical Features – Value your appearance. Simple as that.
  8. Timing – Be aware of what is going on in his life. Don’t move too fast or too slow.
  9. Mystery – Stop explaining yourself. Walk tall. Be sincere. Be adventurous.

This is how you get the guy to fall. Take these tactics. Apply the ones that work for you. For more information on how to make a guy fall in love watch this video. It is more about making an ex fall in love, but there are a lot of good points in there. I made sure.

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