392 thoughts on “This Will Make Him Call You Or Answer The Phone”

  1. Avatar

    Gen

    November 13, 2013 at 5:14 pm

    Hi Chris,
    So after 3 months of nc, I texted him, and he was responding really quickly and seemed willing to chat. I ended the texts fairly early on, as per your advice, and am wondering what to do now…we had only dated briefly before he started talking to his ex, who just recently got into a new relationship (not with him btw), so I don’t know if your suggested texting methods would work in this situation…Any advice would be much appreciated!

    1. admin

      admin

      November 13, 2013 at 9:16 pm

      I think just keep chatting with him and try to get a date.

  2. Avatar

    Wondering

    November 12, 2013 at 11:09 pm

    Hello,

    My ex sent me a text out of the blue. I hadn’t spoken to them in over a year. Had been in nc with him. I asked if we could talk and he called immediately. He seemed eager to talk as well. I was prepared with what to say so that the call would go smooth. However, once he was on the phone he seemed a little guarded. This threw me off somewhat because he wasn’t at the place I needed him to be to talk. He seemed to be listening very intently.
    The call seemed a little awkward which is not good. We’ve always had chemistry.

    When your first call with your ex seems a little awkward , will the ex feel like hmm..maybe there is no more chemistry with her or recognizes it is the first call and won’t leave with that aftertaste (no more chemistry)?

    1. admin

      admin

      November 13, 2013 at 7:04 pm

      I think if its awkward its more of a nervous type of a deal. You are nervous, he is nervous and you are both trying to keep the conversation going without those long pauses.

    2. Avatar

      Wondering

      November 15, 2013 at 12:05 am

      Thanks.

      Update – haven’t heard from him but I did wish him a happy birthday today. He replied hours later saying thank you so much (in caps).

      I’m leaving this alone now. Even though, he confessed a big sentiment to me a few weeks ago, his being distant is causing me to back up. I was the one who initiated nc with him a long time ago so I don’t know if he’s no longer interested or laying back to see if I will chase and to make it seem like I no longer matter to him.

    3. admin

      admin

      November 15, 2013 at 6:17 pm

      How long ago did you initiate NC?

    4. Avatar

      Wondering

      November 15, 2013 at 7:01 pm

      A year ago NC was initiated. He told me he loved me recently but now acts distant. I reached out with a text that wasn’t too emotional but he didn’t say anything about it.

      He probably thought I was going to ask him why no reply but I didn’t. I’m not trying to come off needy or am going to chase him. However, he responded to the birthday text a few hours after being sent with enthusiasm.

      I’m not sending another text. I’m sure he loved the attention from me that wasn’t there for a year, but I think I should go NC.

      Do you think he’ll wonder where I went again?

    5. admin

      admin

      November 16, 2013 at 7:56 pm

      He may wonder. It’s hard to say. But I do think you should go into NC.

    6. Avatar

      Wondering

      November 15, 2013 at 12:08 am

      Should I go back nc or do you think this is a wrap? He said the three words before. Maybe he just needed me to know how he felt about me and wasn’t looking for more.

    7. admin

      admin

      November 15, 2013 at 6:13 pm

      I think go bcak into NC and give it one last shot.

  3. Avatar

    rach

    November 12, 2013 at 9:51 pm

    So I believe everything is going exceptionally well, I’m technically on day five of your “mock week” from your e book and he has initiated conversation a few times which was really nice. I actually texted him this morning knowing he was probably at the gym and told him that I would let him go since he was working out, he then told me that I wasn’t bothering him so I continued the conversation. (I took that as a huge plus since we both hate being bothered while working out but would take the time to talk to each other at those times). He has said things such as; he had really looked forward to meeting my family and that he had looked forward to me meeting his. Is him saying things like that a positive thing?

    1. admin

      admin

      November 13, 2013 at 6:55 pm

      Sweet nice reference from the E-Book with the mock week.

      I think it is a positive thing.

  4. Avatar

    Sally

    November 12, 2013 at 7:22 pm

    Hi Chris! I really like your guides. I even bought you book  They have helped me a lot during tough times. I went through a month of NC before sending my first text. I got a quick and positive response (I think) and 3 days later I sent a text remembering the good old times. He replied saying that he remembered and had a good time too. A few days later I run into him and talked for a bit. At the end he said that he will give me a call sometime. It has been 3 days and he hasn’t call. I am wondering if I should text him again. Should I just wait? How long should I wait before contacting him again?

    1. admin

      admin

      November 13, 2013 at 6:30 pm

      Go ahead and text again but don’t mention the call.

    2. Avatar

      Sally

      November 14, 2013 at 5:02 am

      Thanks for the advice. I did texted him and kept some conversation going for a bit, then ended the conversation by telling him that I had to go. My plan now is to wait some days before texting him again. He is a weird combination of clueless-scared-stubborn type of guy so I feel like I have to go a little slow.
      One more thing..Keep up the good work!! Everything you post is really helpful!

    3. admin

      admin

      November 14, 2013 at 7:29 pm

      Thanks I am doing my best. But I am afraid i am starting to get burned out to be honest.

  5. Avatar

    Rachel

    November 12, 2013 at 11:36 am

    Hi Chris,

    I love this guide! Can I use these texts if you has a new girlfriend?

    Thank-you

    1. admin

      admin

      November 12, 2013 at 7:29 pm

      Sure I don’t see why not.

    2. Avatar

      Rachel

      November 12, 2013 at 11:37 am

      *he has a new

  6. Avatar

    Ah snap

    November 12, 2013 at 8:37 am

    Da Bommb,
    Yes, I’m back! Just so you know, I sent you a FB message awhile ago, but it went straight to your other folders because we aren’t friends. Anyhow, to my embarrassment, you should probably just delete that message! Don’t really need the advice anymore lol

    Hope you are doing wonderful!

    Again, thanks for creating a place to let me vent my little heart out.

    -Ah Snappppp

    1. admin

      admin

      November 12, 2013 at 7:26 pm

      Of course, and just friend me and we can talk!

    2. Avatar

      Ah snap

      November 13, 2013 at 2:15 am

      The deed has been done. 😀

  7. Avatar

    Sally

    November 12, 2013 at 5:07 am

    First, I want to thank you for all these guides. They are very entertaining and got me through NC times. I did a great month of NC and sent my first text. He replied in less than an hour. Although, he didn’t ask how I was doing, I thought it was kind of positive. I didn’t answer back and waited 3 days before sending a text remembering the good times. He replied back saying that he remembered and had a good time too. So far I think that I am doing well. Until, I ran into him last week. We talked for a bit until I said that I had to go. He said he’ll give me a call sometime. That was 3 days ago. I am not planning to text him again until he calls. Is it a good plan? Or should I continue texting? How long should I wait until he calls? should I go back to NC?

    1. admin

      admin

      November 12, 2013 at 7:19 pm

      I would text him if he doesn’t call in 2-3 days. Just to remind him you are there and around you know?

  8. Avatar

    Lindsey

    November 12, 2013 at 2:43 am

    I know you get it a lot, but I wanted to say thank you for everything that you do with this site (and the insane amount of time you must put into it!) It really got me through the first month of my breakup (why didn’t I know about the No Contact rule 10 years ago?!). I’m not sure I still want my ex back, but I continue using your guides and I’m finding that the process of just getting him to have a conversation with me again really helps ease my feeling of rejection. Don’t stop doing what you do! 🙂

    1. admin

      admin

      November 12, 2013 at 7:05 pm

      I get it a lot and for some reason it never gets old? Hahahah ok ok I need to put the ego in check.

  9. Avatar

    juat me...

    November 11, 2013 at 4:07 am

    I am in a relationship, have been for 10 years, but just came across your blog and enjoy reading posts, and then comments, but just had to say, I really laughed out loud at you zombie pictures about Justin being the first to die….lmao was too funny, thanks for the laugh!!

    1. admin

      admin

      November 11, 2013 at 6:23 pm

      Hahaha my favorite part of writing those long guides is picking out the pictures. So I am glad you got my “picture humor.”

  10. Avatar

    Ally

    November 10, 2013 at 8:26 pm

    You’re great Chris! Thanks for these 🙂

    1. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 10:04 pm

      Anytime!

  11. Avatar

    rach

    November 9, 2013 at 12:56 pm

    Yay! Another new guide! You impress me with how quickly you write these! So everything is going very well, the conversation we had after the two days from the “first contact” went well aside of he ended the conversation before I had the chance. We didn’t talk the next day but then he messaged me on the second day (yesterday). The first texts he sent didn’t last long, he was thanking me for something I had done. (This wasn’t a thank you that was necessary by the way). Then a few hours went by and he began messaging me again asking how things were going, telling me how he was glad that things were working out for me and was overall very sweet and honest about things. I managed to throw in a funny story about something I had done. HE seemed to be the one really keeping the conversation going by asking questions and what not. Then HE referenced our old relationship and it was all very positive. I threw in some compliments as well as him, then a few “memory” texts; all of which went well. The only part that confused me a little is when talking he said things like “all I ever wanted was to make you happy” and “I will always have those (good) memories to play back in my head”. The reason those type of comments are confusing is I don’t know if he’s just reaffirming that we aren’t getting back together. I don’t understand why he would engage me in deep and meaningful conversation that went on a couple hours (texting only) if he truly had no intent on getting back together. I’m not pushing anything at all either and I’m not really worried, but he kinda threw me off a little with saying those things. Do you have any input on that?

    1. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 1:13 am

      I worked on overdrive this week to get 2 new ones out.

      Here is the best way I can describe writing these things.

      It is essentially the same thing as writing a 25 page paper for a masters degree class hahaa. Except you have to do it every week. That is the standard I have set for myself.

    2. Avatar

      rach

      November 9, 2013 at 1:50 pm

      I also just realised after going back through the texts that I didn’t ask a single question, but he asked quite a few. Is that possibly I sign that he’s chasing me a little?

    3. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 1:13 am

      Wow! I think it does!

  12. Avatar

    hisWifey

    November 9, 2013 at 3:45 am

    just to let you know, Im reading and soaking it like a sponge. Im thirsty for the knowledge.. and honestly its going to make my NC easier becauae i WANT to see how effective it will all be when applied. i just hope i can do it RIGHT. They say “where there is a will, there is a way” right?!? 😀
    Hope your having a relaxing afternoon and thanks for the blog!

    XXX,
    Hopeful

    1. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 12:50 am

      That is what they say!

      The afternoon was relaxing but I am working now haha.

  13. Avatar

    Sarah

    November 9, 2013 at 3:42 am

    This is a great post. I think I can utilize this when and If I choose to contact my ex. It’s been 2 months no contact, second attempt…I honestly think 30 days no contact is too short but I think it depends on the relationship. I still feel anger towards him and pretty sure it’s the same on his side. I’m too emotional about it, therefore I feel I shouldn’t contact him yet. But…the other side of me wants to text him a video or something that he would find funny. Decisions decisions.

    1. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 12:42 am

      Hahaha thanks I put a lot of work into this. I find that these things take so much time to write they literally make me so mentally tired.

  14. Avatar

    Molly

    November 9, 2013 at 12:58 am

    My ex dumped me this past summer for reasons that he never made clear to me, which of course, leaves me chasing after him. I successfully completed no contact for a month and a half. I was at a party, and he approached me asking what “boundaries” I wanted for our current relationship, that he was sorry, was still attracted to me, etc. He even hugged me a few times and acted very interested. I had to leave so I said I’d text him, and we had a casual conversation that lasted a few days which eventually fizzled and I was the one that sent the last text (which wasn’t something he could really reply to anyways). Where should I go from here? It’s really tempting to start a new conversation, although I know that might ruin things.

    1. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 12:28 am

      Wait a few days and text him again. Have you ever used any of the messages on this site before?

  15. Avatar

    May

    November 8, 2013 at 10:36 pm

    Hey Chris 🙂

    OK – I actually spoke to him on the phone over 3 weeks ago to give greetings for a special day and he sounded emotional … he then explained I’m sorry I just don’t know how to talk with you after I’ve hurt you and left you and your voice made me emotional.
    * So basically he feels awkward/upset/insecure talking to me because of he feels bad about leaving me.
    >He sent me an email this Wednesday past wishing me well and I sent him one back an hour later wishing him well too and asked him if he was working in another country now
    – He’s not an email person at all and doesn’t check it or need it considering he’s in the construction industry … if he doesn’t reply by next week (his bday is next week also) …
    > Should I then text him to ask if he is working abroad 30 days from the day I emailed him back – wednesday Nov 6 ? And initiate NC from that email ?
    I would call but I don’t want him being nervous and awkward again.

    Thanx Chris aka Girls insider to the boyfriend brain 😛

    1. Avatar

      May

      November 8, 2013 at 10:48 pm

      Also to add( Sorry >,<" ) if you do answer reinitiate NC and then speak to him… If so … like do I just straight up send a text like

      [[Heyy Howa you doing, was just thinking about you and wondered if you're ok I have't heard from you since I replied to your email last month
      Wanted to know if you're working out in Germany ?
      Hope your well and safe
      May]]

      Ahhhh please give me some enlightenment of how I should chika-chikaaaa-break it down ? lol A suggestion Chrisssssss

      I'm planning on doing it on Whats App for the instant messaging effect

      Thanx once again – looking forward to your brain juice

    2. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 12:19 am

      nice use of the “chikkkaa chickkkaa”

      I think that is a sweet one but take out the “how are you doing.”

    3. Avatar

      May

      November 10, 2013 at 12:16 pm

      Thanks so much for replying – Glad you enjoyed my cyber-spelt-D J beats ! 😛

      Sorry, when should I text him this? a week after his birthday (this Tuesday coming 12th) or 30 days after ?

      *Also ahhhh one of our mutual friends asked me for s*x
      * My ex should be informed as that is complete disrespect towards him considering my ex is a really good friend to him and they hang out loads … I have completely cut of this guy who I thought was a worthy trusting friend but I guess being single showed his true colours …
      I need to tell my ex because I know when he knows he’ll cut him off too …. how should I chika-chika break this shxt dowwwwwn too ?
      -SIGH OF STRESS-
      Thanks Chris 🙂

    4. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 10:07 pm

      DJ beats in da hizzzousssee!

      Ok, that was bad.

      After 30 days NC is when you should text him that.

      Hmmm do it after you and your ex are on better terms. I have seen these situations backfire when an ex takes the friends side.

    5. Avatar

      May

      November 11, 2013 at 12:28 am

      😀 haha thanks honestly thanks you’ve given me a lot of confidence
      like im not even being a sad slop … just taking it a day at a time 😉

      Okay so boom – a month of NC – then whatsapp [[Heyy, I was just thinking about you and wondered if you’re ok I have’t heard from you since I replied to your email last month
      Wanted to know if you’re working out in Germany ?
      Hope your well and safe, May]]

      and then when he replies and were in convo I’ll let him know about the guy …
      should i be like look i dont know how to go about this but so and so text me not long ago coming on to me … i didnt reply and cut him off completely right after i lost complete respect for him and was disgusted and didnt even want to explain myself

      Love&Thanks, May ♥

    6. admin

      admin

      November 11, 2013 at 6:07 pm

      I think thats a good way to approach it but butter him up more first. Make sure he is receptive of talking to you first before you drop the bomb on him hahaha.

    7. Avatar

      May

      November 11, 2013 at 8:16 pm

      thanks 🙂 LOOKING FORWARD to a new post of your master mind juice
      Appreciate your time and effort, really do >,<

      Topic suggestion .. if he promises he will come back to you … should you wait ?

    8. admin

      admin

      November 12, 2013 at 6:33 pm

      Thanks for the topic suggestion!

    9. Avatar

      May

      November 9, 2013 at 4:17 pm

      ahhhhhh >_< Sorry again
      Forgot to mention that his email came after me doing NC … So should I go ahead and ask him if he is abroad like next weekend so that its past his bday (Nov 12th) or do I wait another long month …
      I just really want to know if he is abroad or not for some peace of mind … and don't want to drag it on yano

      helppppppppp
      Thanx again – Honestly really appreciate your time and effort Chris

  16. Avatar

    Coco

    November 8, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    Hi Chris! I justi finished reading your new post! Youre awesome!
    There was a fire at the bar we used to hang out with our friends that we have in common and I texted if he was Ok (I wasn’t there but I saw it on the news). He told me everything was fine and that no one got hurt. I told him I was glad he and everybody was OK but I immediately told him after that that I missed him. He didn’t replied back. Then 2 days after, I texted him that I missed him, that I was being 100% honest and that if he could give us a second chance. He didn’t text me back immediately but he just sent me back a text saying thanks. Which in some way I just didn’t understand. I even texted him to have a “happy Halloween!” Which sounds lame but he just replied saying “thanks you too” then I texted him to go out have some lunch or dinner together but he replied to me “no I have plans”. I finished the conversation just saying “OK”. I haven’t text him in 6 days… Should I wait more days before I contact him again? If so how many days more? I want to give him the space he needs but at the same time I don’t want to screw everything again. One thing i am glad is that he is replying but not in the way I want. I’ m just afraid that he will stop texting me back if I say or do something wrong again.

    Thanks for your help Chris!

    1. admin

      admin

      November 9, 2013 at 11:56 pm

      No problem. Give it some time. Soon you can get him to reply how you want you just need to be patient.

    2. Avatar

      Coco

      November 10, 2013 at 1:53 am

      How much longer do I need to wait? I’m at 7 days right now and its starting to feel like an eternity… will 2 weeks sound good? or should I do more than that? Thanks!

    3. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 9:44 pm

      Sure, lets shoot for two weeks at this point. Another 7 days.

    4. Avatar

      Coco

      November 10, 2013 at 11:14 pm

      Btw his bday is coming up and I’m still doing the NC rule I want to wish him a happy birthday but if I’m in NC should I text him that? And also The festivities are going to start pretty soon (thanksgiving, Xmas, NYE) and I don’t want him to think that I’m just texting him because of those festivities… What can I do or say to not make him think that I’m just texting him because of the festivities and think that I just don’t want to be lonely during this dates?

    5. admin

      admin

      November 11, 2013 at 5:57 pm

      You can hook him into a conversation and get him attached to you emotionally.

  17. Avatar

    Bethy

    November 8, 2013 at 11:17 am

    Another precious new post! You are so patient and awesome, Chris.

    All I want to say here is:
    Like my comments on other pages,
    I followed 90% of your tactics and rules in our first break up, and succeeded.
    1.5 months later of reconciliation, we had to break up again.
    I’m currently now in over 2 weeks of NC.
    I think it won’t work well as first time, because he and both of us already used to what after next. he’s stubborn and good in those experiences.
    This is second break-up. I’m not so desperate right now.
    I think this NC won’t be affective like first time.
    How should I do? Chris…

    Thanks

    1. admin

      admin

      November 8, 2013 at 6:57 pm

      Yay! Someone commented. I was worrying.

      NC won’t be as effective BUT I would still do it.

    2. Avatar

      Bethy

      November 9, 2013 at 6:34 am

      I know I’m against the nature! My situation is really sucked and left unsaid.
      I think no one want to re-enter to an ex’s life after twice of break up.
      But challenging the impossible is my ambition.
      If we were not LDR, things won’t be that complicated.
      He look feeling nothing for this second break-up, and
      girls who want him are already around (waiting for our break-up since we’re in relationship)

      That’s really annoying.
      I’m always refreshing your page to get new posts.
      Hope you can suggest me well for my sucked situation.

    3. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 1:01 am

      Well, I am sorry I don’t post as often as some other sites. It’s just with the way I do things it takes time :(.

    4. Avatar

      Bethy

      November 10, 2013 at 1:44 pm

      Aww Chris! Seems you take the wrong way of my words.
      Refreshing for your posts means describing my appreciation for every of your posts.

      All I want to know is:
      to get your suggestion for my sucked situation for this second break-up (As I mentioned above).

      Please help.
      Thanks Chris

    5. admin

      admin

      November 10, 2013 at 10:07 pm

      Sorry bethy could you be more specific for me.

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