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213 thoughts on “How to Make a Stubborn Ex Boyfriend Come Running Back”

  1. Aditi

    August 11, 2018 at 12:35 pm

    Yesterday, he finally said that since we want different things, he thinks that we cannot be together. I wish for him to express his feelings verbally or by actions. To which his reaction is that he gets pissed, answering – “This is how I am”, “If I am with you, that means that I love you and will be with you”.
    Never, in our entire 2 years’ relationship has he said that he will change and be a better person for me or will do anything to make me stay. He has always been ok with me leaving.

    Now, that he has finally ended. And I let him go this time without any revolt or arguments. I just replied with “Yes, I understand your reasons. Tc of yourself. Bye”
    Though I want him to realise, I am not sure if he ever will. I don’t know what place did I hold in his life. How could it be so easy for him to let me go? Always??

    Everything else has been more important to him than me. Even now, he must be ok. As in all our past fights, he has been ok and resumes with his life as normal.

    Please suggest!!

  2. Roberta

    August 3, 2018 at 5:42 pm

    What if this is the second time my boyfriend has broken up with me? First time was a year and a half ago and he was away for 3 weeks. I didn’t apply no contact and just let him back in. Now he has broken up w me again giving same excuses of not seeing a future but I know he loves me as he constantly talked about the future. My intuition says he freaks out and gets scared because he isn’t where he wants to be financially or career wise to be in a relationship. Can this work twice or is twice an omen to stay Away ?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 4, 2018 at 2:46 am

      Hi Roberta…breakups are fairly common in relationships. Now if you guys were on your 4th one, I would say that is dysfunctional. But think about an extended no contact period and when you do get back together after so much needed healing on both sides, be sure to address the core issues triggering the breakups.

  3. Anita Glenn

    February 28, 2018 at 10:10 pm

    Thank you so much. This help me threw it.

  4. Anita Glenn

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    Thank you so much. This help me threw it.

  5. Nikita

    January 29, 2018 at 6:13 pm

    Hi,
    so basically I dated my boyfriend for 8 months. he is quite a very busy guy – he works 3 jobs (because he is going to do a loan) and recently he was offered a course from one of those jobs for just 4 weeks starting this january. anyway long story short, he used to break up for almost every argument we had which was mainly started by me arguing of how little we used to meet weekly. (p.s. minor arguments because he used to text me the following day or 2 of the argument).
    his working schedule is from Monday till Friday he works from 6am – 430pm (job 1) then by 6pm till approx. 10.30pm (job 2 – catering); then Saturday morning he used to spend like 4hrs job 3 and again Job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm till midnight or so and then, Sunday just job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm onwards. But of course he would not have the ‘energy’ to meet up with me on sunday evening because he has to go to the other job starting 6am on Monday – which I really did effort to be understanding.
    – N.B. We live very close to each other like maybe 20 minutes drive.

    So I felt quite pissed lately not finding time for me, although he used to tell me from the very first day that he is super busy and that he will not find time for me as much as he should to or as much as I deserve but somehow i still accepted. at the beginning of our relationship he was very sweet and caring and to be honest he still is, for instance once after a minor argument and talked about some issues he told me “you are too good to be lost” and also “whenever we meet i forget all of my problems encountered at work and throughout my life” ( which was back in December).
    (The issues and arguments are always about the fact that he has literally no time for me)
    The last argument we had was about the same issue which was how sad I feel sometimes that he doesn’t find time for me and his response was just like this: ” I think we should break up because you don’t deserve someone like me who doesn’t afford to find time for someone like you. probably it’s because you do not understand how busy my life is and i have no option in staying like this before i finish the loan payments for sure. So it would be best for you to find someone better because you seem to want more attention than i give you ”

    Well, i suggested that we should move in together rather than breaking up but he does not want to rush things out as he has never been in a ‘serious relationship’. So i thought he has already made up his mind in seriously breaking up with me this time and so i accepted the break up.
    After 2 days i texted him and it didn’t turn up to end well. I ended up insulting him and he pointed out that he is doing this for my own good.
    I currently in my final year of University and i have lots of pressure, stress and sometime some anger issues. My hormonal imbalance does not help a lot but he knows i have these issues.
    I know he never meant harm and i think he has feelings for me even though he told me once or twice that he loves me, but now i think either i annoyed him or that somehow over did it with these arguments. Some suggestions would be greatly appreciated

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 31, 2018 at 5:06 pm

      Hi Nikita,

      when did you broke up? Are you going to do the nc rule?

  6. Nikita

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    Hi,
    so basically I dated my boyfriend for 8 months. he is quite a very busy guy – he works 3 jobs (because he is going to do a loan) and recently he was offered a course from one of those jobs for just 4 weeks starting this january. anyway long story short, he used to break up for almost every argument we had which was mainly started by me arguing of how little we used to meet weekly. (p.s. minor arguments because he used to text me the following day or 2 of the argument).
    his working schedule is from Monday till Friday he works from 6am – 430pm (job 1) then by 6pm till approx. 10.30pm (job 2 – catering); then Saturday morning he used to spend like 4hrs job 3 and again Job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm till midnight or so and then, Sunday just job 2 (catering) starting from 6pm onwards. But of course he would not have the ‘energy’ to meet up with me on sunday evening because he has to go to the other job starting 6am on Monday – which I really did effort to be understanding.
    – N.B. We live very close to each other like maybe 20 minutes drive.

    So I felt quite pissed lately not finding time for me, although he used to tell me from the very first day that he is super busy and that he will not find time for me as much as he should to or as much as I deserve but somehow i still accepted. at the beginning of our relationship he was very sweet and caring and to be honest he still is, for instance once after a minor argument and talked about some issues he told me “you are too good to be lost” and also “whenever we meet i forget all of my problems encountered at work and throughout my life” ( which was back in December).
    (The issues and arguments are always about the fact that he has literally no time for me)
    The last argument we had was about the same issue which was how sad I feel sometimes that he doesn’t find time for me and his response was just like this: ” I think we should break up because you don’t deserve someone like me who doesn’t afford to find time for someone like you. probably it’s because you do not understand how busy my life is and i have no option in staying like this before i finish the loan payments for sure. So it would be best for you to find someone better because you seem to want more attention than i give you ”

    Well, i suggested that we should move in together rather than breaking up but he does not want to rush things out as he has never been in a ‘serious relationship’. So i thought he has already made up his mind in seriously breaking up with me this time and so i accepted the break up.
    After 2 days i texted him and it didn’t turn up to end well. I ended up insulting him and he pointed out that he is doing this for my own good.
    I currently in my final year of University and i have lots of pressure, stress and sometime some anger issues. My hormonal imbalance does not help a lot but he knows i have these issues.
    I know he never meant harm and i think he has feelings for me even though he told me once or twice that he loves me, but now i think either i annoyed him or that somehow over did it with these arguments. Some suggestions would be greatly appreciated

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 30, 2018 at 9:31 am

      Hi Nikita,

      when did you broke up? Are you going to do the nc rule?

  7. Josey

    January 15, 2018 at 6:47 am

    Help EBR.

    My ex and I were together for 2 years and we recently broke up 2 months ago. We were very committed and I had a promise ring. For the most part our relationship was perfect. We did everything together and were so in love. We even got our first place together. However out of nowhere he told me he was unhappy and broke up with me shortly after. The last 6 months before that had been a little rough with some petty fighting here and there but nothing I thought was abnormal…I mean every couple goes through a rough patch right?

    Well after the breakup I continuously tried everything I could to stay in touch. I got so far with it that I even convinced him to come over for dinner one night and it was great. Everything turned out just how I had hoped. We talked about everything and he even agreed that we could continue talking and if we took things slow. With that being said, I continued to text him, however he put up another wall and just stopped responding. It didn’t matter what time of day I texted him or what I would say, he would say nothing back. Eventually this became so frustrating that I comeplety blew up and in turn, I was told it “pushed him over the edge.” About a week after hearing that, he showed up to an event he knew I would be at and purposely made out with some girl he had brought with him right in front of me. I was heartbroken. Every time I would turn to look at him, he would just smirk and go back to kissing her. This was so devesating for me and honestly, my worst nightmare. That same night, I sent him a pretty blunt text and told him how heartbroken I was. I said some things I probably shouldnt have out of hurt and anger and I regretted it instantly the next day. It’s been a week since I sent that message and I do not know if he ever tried to respond because instantly blocked him. We aren’t friends on any social media either. It’s been a week since I sent that message and I haven’t said a word to him.

    My question is…if I go 30 days without contact, do I still have a chance getting him back given the situation at hand?? Or do you think he has completely moved on?

    My heart is aching and I am trying to take steps to move forward but I really miss my best friend and I really feel that the problems we had before are easily fixed with better communication. I just need a chance from him.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 15, 2018 at 7:45 pm

      Hi Josey,

      Try it first.. It’s not a guarantee to work in any situation but it helps increase your chances.

  8. Josey

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    Help EBR.

    My ex and I were together for 2 years and we recently broke up 2 months ago. We were very committed and I had a promise ring. For the most part our relationship was perfect. We did everything together and were so in love. We even got our first place together. However out of nowhere he told me he was unhappy and broke up with me shortly after. The last 6 months before that had been a little rough with some petty fighting here and there but nothing I thought was abnormal…I mean every couple goes through a rough patch right?

    Well after the breakup I continuously tried everything I could to stay in touch. I got so far with it that I even convinced him to come over for dinner one night and it was great. Everything turned out just how I had hoped. We talked about everything and he even agreed that we could continue talking and if we took things slow. With that being said, I continued to text him, however he put up another wall and just stopped responding. It didn’t matter what time of day I texted him or what I would say, he would say nothing back. Eventually this became so frustrating that I comeplety blew up and in turn, I was told it “pushed him over the edge.” About a week after hearing that, he showed up to an event he knew I would be at and purposely made out with some girl he had brought with him right in front of me. I was heartbroken. Every time I would turn to look at him, he would just smirk and go back to kissing her. This was so devesating for me and honestly, my worst nightmare. That same night, I sent him a pretty blunt text and told him how heartbroken I was. I said some things I probably shouldnt have out of hurt and anger and I regretted it instantly the next day. It’s been a week since I sent that message and I do not know if he ever tried to respond because instantly blocked him. We aren’t friends on any social media either. It’s been a week since I sent that message and I haven’t said a word to him.

    My question is…if I go 30 days without contact, do I still have a chance getting him back given the situation at hand?? Or do you think he has completely moved on?

    My heart is aching and I am trying to take steps to move forward but I really miss my best friend and I really feel that the problems we had before are easily fixed with better communication. I just need a chance from him.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 30, 2018 at 7:43 am

      Hi Josey,

      Try it first.. It’s not a guarantee to work in any situation but it helps increase your chances.

  9. Ari

    January 10, 2018 at 3:09 am

    Hi,
    So my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me last week. Everything was going great. We had a great date night when all of the sudden a conversation came up about the future and he said he didn’t see a future with me and breaking up is probably best. Mind you, just hours before he was telling me he loved me and we were smiling and having fun. I told him that we should take a day or 2 to cool down and then talk about it. We did. He said he still thinks breaking up is probably best, but he said he still loves me and literally didn’t want to leave even though the conversation was over. We were in a long distance relationship and I think he felt pressured that when I am done with school in a few months, I was making the decision to move to where he is. He basically said he doesn’t feel confident enough about me to uproot my life like that. The thing is, he is such an overthinker and always doubts things. I’ve been implementing no contact for 5 days now and plan to continue even though it’s hard. I’m just confused. How can you be with someone for 3 years and not be sure about a future? He also tried to throw the incompatible line at me. Part of me believes that once he stops overthinking everything and realizes what he left behind, he will regret it, but I don’t know. I’m so broken hearted. Is there any chance I can get him back in a few months once we have both worked on ourselves for a little bit?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      January 11, 2018 at 5:14 pm

      Hi Ari,

      I think there’s a chance.. You mean you’re going to do months of nc? If so, how long?

  10. Ari

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    Hi,
    So my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me last week. Everything was going great. We had a great date night when all of the sudden a conversation came up about the future and he said he didn’t see a future with me and breaking up is probably best. Mind you, just hours before he was telling me he loved me and we were smiling and having fun. I told him that we should take a day or 2 to cool down and then talk about it. We did. He said he still thinks breaking up is probably best, but he said he still loves me and literally didn’t want to leave even though the conversation was over. We were in a long distance relationship and I think he felt pressured that when I am done with school in a few months, I was making the decision to move to where he is. He basically said he doesn’t feel confident enough about me to uproot my life like that. The thing is, he is such an overthinker and always doubts things. I’ve been implementing no contact for 5 days now and plan to continue even though it’s hard. I’m just confused. How can you be with someone for 3 years and not be sure about a future? He also tried to throw the incompatible line at me. Part of me believes that once he stops overthinking everything and realizes what he left behind, he will regret it, but I don’t know. I’m so broken hearted. Is there any chance I can get him back in a few months once we have both worked on ourselves for a little bit?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 30, 2018 at 7:43 am

      Hi Ari,

      I think there’s a chance.. You mean you’re going to do months of nc? If so, how long?

  11. Mila

    December 29, 2017 at 4:38 pm

    Hi Amor,
    Suddenly he deleted my number from his phone. I can say that because I am not able to see his profile pic. on whatsapp but can able to see last seen. So I am sure that hedeleted my number but not blocked me. I was active on whatsapp story. What do you think? What can be his intention to do that? I thought he either try to make me react or make himself forget me easily… I did nothing about that I am stick my extra n.c (30 days) waiting… And also one thing to say is it something or not I dont know but he stoped to sharing on social media when he deleted my number. He was soooo active before that. Any suggestion? advice? anything will make me happy. Thank you…

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 31, 2017 at 9:15 pm

      be more active in doing posts in Facebook or Instagram that are not stories, or those that doesn’t disappear.

  12. Mila

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    Hi Amor,
    Suddenly he deleted my number from his phone. I can say that because I am not able to see his profile pic. on whatsapp but can able to see last seen. So I am sure that hedeleted my number but not blocked me. I was active on whatsapp story. What do you think? What can be his intention to do that? I thought he either try to make me react or make himself forget me easily… I did nothing about that I am stick my extra n.c (30 days) waiting… And also one thing to say is it something or not I dont know but he stoped to sharing on social media when he deleted my number. He was soooo active before that. Any suggestion? advice? anything will make me happy. Thank you…

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 30, 2018 at 7:43 am

      be more active in doing posts in Facebook or Instagram that are not stories, or those that doesn’t disappear.

  13. Andy

    December 27, 2017 at 7:24 am

    My ex and I were together for 13 years. For the last 5 years we were living in a long distance relationship. Both of us were trying to make the relationship work and everybody was telling us that we were such a great fit for eachother. Of course we had our flaws, but whatever was wrong we tried to resolve in the intimacy of our relationship. However, a year ago I told him that I wanted to settle down someplace, have a family, raise children and he said that first I would have to leave everything, quit my job and move over. And I would have done that just that everytime I would decide to take that leap of faith he would do something to pull me back from doing it. So, long story short we broke up. Almost two months after the breakup he decided he wanted to reconcile and we gave it another try. Just that he wasn’t the same, it was like he was punishing me for all the things I did wrong during our relationship. After three months we broke up again. I initiated the breakup, but deep down I felt like he was pushing me to do it. Now we’re separated for 8 months. We talk once a month, when he comes in the country he calls me and meets for a coffee. I feel like he is the one for me. I gave him space and tried to improve myself. I studied for a career change and even have been to a few interviews to the city he lives in. I want to become a better me and I also wanted him to see that I’m trying to make things work. Last time I went for an interview I stayed at his place. It was just like when we were together. He was very caring and loving towards me and we ended up making love. It was a magical week. After I came back home I decided that when we would meet again I would ask him to give us another chance and that I would do anything to make it work, even moving straightaway to his town of residence and live everything behind. And I did, just that he said no, that we broke up and that ment done for us, that he is very stubborn and that he knows he is making a huge mistake letting me go. He even told me that I was the love of his life. I’m heartbroken and really don’t know what to do next. I really feel that we are ment to be together. I decided to give him space, thinking that if he would ever want to be together he will tell me but in the same time I fear that he will try to do his best to forget me. Is there anything I can do to make him change his mind?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      December 28, 2017 at 4:26 pm

  14. Andy

    March 30, 2018 at 4:42 am

    My ex and I were together for 13 years. For the last 5 years we were living in a long distance relationship. Both of us were trying to make the relationship work and everybody was telling us that we were such a great fit for eachother. Of course we had our flaws, but whatever was wrong we tried to resolve in the intimacy of our relationship. However, a year ago I told him that I wanted to settle down someplace, have a family, raise children and he said that first I would have to leave everything, quit my job and move over. And I would have done that just that everytime I would decide to take that leap of faith he would do something to pull me back from doing it. So, long story short we broke up. Almost two months after the breakup he decided he wanted to reconcile and we gave it another try. Just that he wasn’t the same, it was like he was punishing me for all the things I did wrong during our relationship. After three months we broke up again. I initiated the breakup, but deep down I felt like he was pushing me to do it. Now we’re separated for 8 months. We talk once a month, when he comes in the country he calls me and meets for a coffee. I feel like he is the one for me. I gave him space and tried to improve myself. I studied for a career change and even have been to a few interviews to the city he lives in. I want to become a better me and I also wanted him to see that I’m trying to make things work. Last time I went for an interview I stayed at his place. It was just like when we were together. He was very caring and loving towards me and we ended up making love. It was a magical week. After I came back home I decided that when we would meet again I would ask him to give us another chance and that I would do anything to make it work, even moving straightaway to his town of residence and live everything behind. And I did, just that he said no, that we broke up and that ment done for us, that he is very stubborn and that he knows he is making a huge mistake letting me go. He even told me that I was the love of his life. I’m heartbroken and really don’t know what to do next. I really feel that we are ment to be together. I decided to give him space, thinking that if he would ever want to be together he will tell me but in the same time I fear that he will try to do his best to forget me. Is there anything I can do to make him change his mind?

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 30, 2018 at 7:43 am

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