How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back If HE Broke Up With You

1,328 thoughts on “He Broke Up With You And Now You Want Him Back”

James

August 13, 2015 at 4:34 am

I was with my fiance for 2 1/2 years. 2 weeks ago he said we should go out separate ways. I know he loves me. It is not him to just all of a sudden say that. So here is our history summed up in a couple paragraphs. This is a gay story.

I’m am 25 and he is 22, he was recently diagnosed with chrome disease back in January. He had two major surgeries in that month. It was very hard for him and for me as well. I was by his side every day as long as I could for 30 days. I never left his aide along with his family. He was raises like a typical southern man. Always considerate, respectful and very chivalrous. He always asked the nurse and his parents if I was ok. After a month of being in the hospital he finally got discharged, he came home. We lived together had our own house. I nurtured him and took care of all of his meals and followed strictly to his chrones and iliostomy diet. I did everything I could.

Being young as we were, we actually lived very comfortably with our pay. We weren’t rich but paid every bill. We were in love and very happy. After awhile he returned back to work. He is a medic in the ER. Ever since he returned to work he would come home as a different person. He now has an iliosotomy bag on the side of his stomach. He would repeatedly tell. Me that I deserve better, and that I should be with someone else so I wouldn’t have to deal with his illness and depression.he hurt that I hurt, running him into the ER every 4 days for about two months. I kept reassuring him that I want to be with him and n one else. I will go through hell and back with him. His illness is mine. He is a southernguy and I’m a city guy. Two completely different personalities, but it was this that we fell in love with one another.

So March came around and I asked his parents for his hand in marriage. Then we were together for 2 years. Wanted to start a family together. On his birthday I planned a surprise birthday party at his parents home, all of his family, my family and all of our close friends were there. At that time when the cake came out I kneeled down and asked him hand in marriage in front if everyone. As he said yes he started to cry. We all were very happy, my mother, and his parents went into tears. We were deeply in love.

As days went by he still came home different. I know he was not feeling well with this illness. Even before the illness he already had a low self esteem. After it was even worse, and I can understand. We argued and kept bearing a dead horse on how he felt about the smallest things. The smallest things weren’t a big deal to me but it was a huge deal to him. We started arguing a lot. Then in June I got laid off… Perfect timing I know. Life sucks. But just to add that to our list and his list of stress. I don’t know what really is going on in his head but everything eventually took a toll.

A week before he actually left he said he needed to go to his parents to clear his head. He started to cry and with a mumbling tone he said he felt like he was falling out of love with me. I told him that he should go to his parents to clear his head. The country can release any stress you have. So that was a good idea to me at that time. We didn’t really leave that day on a good note.

At 1 in the morning he left to his parents. I felt bad for leaving that conversation on a bad note. So I drove and hour and half out into the country to tell him I was sorry and that I loved him so much. When I got to his parents house he came out surprised that I drove all the way here. I only wanted to say sorry and that I loved him then I was going to drive back home. We started to talk then I started to cry, he hugged me I cried more, he cuddled me and hushed me like you would a baby and told me that he was very happy that I unexpectedly drove out there, he said that showed him that I wanted to be with him. He told me that he was stupid to of left and felt horrible to think he could of lost me. He said I was the man of his world and doesn’t want to give that up. He insisted that we go back to the home he belongs. So we went back home and held one another all night. The next morning he woke up not himself. And said he really thinks he should Lear his mind and go to his parents. I said it is perfectly OK.

He left again to drive to his parents, he then called me 30 minutes later and said, “screw this, I don’t need to be away from you, I love you to the end of the world and back and we can get through anything and make it work.” so he then turned his car around and came home. We spent the rest of the day with each other, holding each other.

The next morning he went to work. He came back home around 7pm. We went into the back yard where he lit a cigarette, the air was silent and there was nothing but frogs and crickets all around us. Not a single word to break the silence. He then said to me, “I honestly think we should go our separate ways.” at that time I said OK, and walked inside. He started to pack his clothes and we got into another argument and we took off our rings. I made him his engagement ring out of a gold dollar coin which took me days to make, and when he took it off it shot a hole through my heart. He left, and he said he will be back next week for the rest of his things. I couldn’t say much more. It hurt so much. I didn’t know what was truly going on in his head. He refused to talk to me. I eventually got the chance to speak to him a day later, he said that it was better this way, and that there is not another chance for us to be together. He refused to talk to me and told me to make it easier for the both of us and move on, if our path cross again then we will see. I don’t know what I did to him to all of sudden hav him go from I want to spend the rest of my life with you, to not being with me over night. It has been almost two weeks since I’ve responded to his texts saying he is going to be at my house at this time to pick up some more things.

To add to this story, my best friend and his be are moving out of my place at the end of this month to get their own place. My ex fiance will be moving in with them so he wouldn’t have to commute an 1 1/2 hours twice a day to work and his parents house. So now I have to live with knowing my ex fiance will be living with my best friend and his be.

What should I do?

He has his last operation to reverse the iliosotmy bag in a couple of months. I want to show him my support like I did once before, I want to show him that I won’t be going anywhere. I know he is still in love with me. I feel he is putting on a fake face to hide his true problems, maybe psychological problems about his health and everything else that was causing him stress? I don’t know. All I know is that I will support him, he is the one that I want to be with. During sickness and health.

Should I visit him in the hospital when the time comes?

I have realized what I can improve on for myself as a person and I will truly commit to that. But one thing for sure is that I will not stop being there for him even when he doesn’t want to put me through all of this.

I don’t know what time will tell or what the future beholds. But am I bad to not let go? I know he needs this time apart to focus on his health and low self esteem. He has a lot of personal problems to learn for himself. And so do I. I wanted to be there for him as his fiance. But it will be impossible to help someone improve on their psychological problems other than themselves.

I just feel abandoned and left alone in his shadows in my house now. It hurts so much, food lost taste, colors seem dimmer. The other half of me had just withered and fell through my hands and I’m slowly fading away into the endless space alone… In the dark.

I need help and advice.

James

August 26, 2015 at 7:09 pm

We were engaged, now we have both broke it off. He is still in recovery he has a colostomy bag on his stomach. The next and final surgery is in October to reverse everything and take off the bag. Before he was admitted into the hospital of course we had some problems, he already had a low self esteem and always thought that I could do better and that he wasn’t enough for me. So we would always beat a dead horse. After the hospital his emotions got more sensitive and we kept beating a dead horse. We ran into some financial troubles, a couple months later I was laid off. When he broke up with me he started to treat me lower than dirt. He made me feel like this was all my fault. I have no idea why he is acting so bitter against me when all I have done was support him and care for him and love him. Of course I had my own flaws. I feel that the no contact rule that I am currently pursuing is not working. I feel that he is doing the no contact rule to me and it is working. He was the one that ended the relationship but he told a family friend that he was still deeply in love with me but he was confused and afraid of what his life would be like in the future. I have no explanation for his anger and the way he is treating me. Is it because it is easier to be angry at your loved one than to accept your own personal and mental problems? I am currently pursuing the no contact rule, he blocked my phone number and I blocked him on the other social media apps. But he has the surgery in October, I still feel deep down in my heart and in my mind that I still want to be the strong foundations and the hope and the light and the guide to help him back on his feet like I did once before. Am ia fool for wanting to be there for him for his next surgery?
Chris Seiter

August 25, 2015 at 3:33 pm

Ok couple of questions first. 1. Are you currently married to him or still just engaged? 2. Is he in recovery/is he better or going into surgery? 3. Was there any problems before this? (Fighting, any signs of him pulling away etc?) 4. You know him best, is he just trying to do this to test you or does he really want some time apart?

Gemma

July 23, 2015 at 2:58 pm

Hi Chris, I’m a little stuck too. My ex broke up with me 5days ago while I was at work. I think to start with that was a little harsh because I couldn’t concentrate properly for the rest of the day and had to put on fake smiles and all for the customers.

Anyway, we met in April last year through other people and got to know each other pretty fast. We got really close or I thought we had until I found out through his sister that he had been with at least three other girls at the same time.

Obviously I was upset and he kept telling me that he was sorry and he only did that becasue we weren’t technically together. I’d told him if he was sorry that he should apologise to my face instead of texts, and surprisingly he did.

Then after a couple of months he came back to me saying that he wouldn’t ever do it again and to my knowledge he hasn’t, but I do wonder. We were pretty good for a while I was 17 at the time and he had just turned 17. It was a kinda long distance relationship so we very rarely saw each other.

Then just before Christmas he started coming to see me. I thought this was a big step in the right direction. But then on his visits he mainly talked about sex or other things like that. We never did anything and between monthly visits we didn’t talk all that much but I think that might just be down to really over protective parents, not wanting me to have a boyfriend or even talk to boys.

I didn’t think too much of it. But then he came to see me and everything was okay tried talking to my parents but they immediately disliked him because he was good looking and he must be having lots of girls on the go and that I’m just being played. Again this is normal so I ignored them too.

Then we talked very little and out of the blue wanted to visit me again and suggested we look for a hotel room. I was a little uncomfortable and agreed but then after not looking for one said they cost too much let’s do something else. He came to see me and everything seemed okay. But then he never contacted me for two weeks.

My parents were constantly saying he was playing me and my friends thought it was odd. This started playing on my mind and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. So I asked him if he was playing me. He told me he wasn’t but he thought we should break up because we weren’t working. When I asked him why it wasn’t working he told me it was because we didn’t talk and that it was my parents and he couldn’t see me because he couldn’t afford it.

I don’t know if those are the reasons I don’t know if it was because I didn’t fulfil his sexual needs or my parents were too much to handle but I do want him back. Would you please help me out?

I would also like to know how I’m meant to deal with him when we go on a youth trip together with a few other youth and I’m more than likely going to run into him a few times!

Then he told me that he wanted me to wait for him for at least 3 years just in case we might work?!

I hope you can help me.
Gemma

July 22, 2015 at 9:46 pm

Hi Chris, I’m a little stuck too. My ex broke up with me 5days ago while I was at work. I think to start with that was a little harsh because I couldn’t concentrate properly for the rest of the day and had to put on fake smiles and all for the customers.

Anyway, we met in April last year through other people and got to know each other pretty fast. We got really close or I thought we had until I found out through his sister that he had been with at least three other girls at the same time.

Obviously I was upset and he kept telling me that he was sorry and he only did that becasue we weren’t technically together. I’d told him if he was sorry that he should apologise to my face instead of texts, and surprisingly he did.

Then after a couple of months he came back to me saying that he wouldn’t ever do it again and to my knowledge he hasn’t, but I do wonder. We were pretty good for a while I was 17 at the time and he had just turned 17. It was a kinda long distance relationship so we very rarely saw each other.

Then just before Christmas he started coming to see me. I thought this was a big step in the right direction. But then on his visits he mainly talked about sex or other things like that. We never did anything and between monthly visits we didn’t talk all that much but I think that might just be down to really over protective parents, not wanting me to have a boyfriend or even talk to boys.

I didn’t think too much of it. But then he came to see me and everything was okay tried talking to my parents but they immediately disliked him because he was good looking and he must be having lots of girls on the go and that I’m just being played. Again this is normal so I ignored them too.

Then we talked very little and out of the blue wanted to visit me again and suggested we look for a hotel room. I was a little uncomfortable and agreed but then after not looking for one said they cost too much let’s do something else. He came to see me and everything seemed okay. But then he never contacted me for two weeks.

My parents were constantly saying he was playing me and my friends thought it was odd. This started playing on my mind and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. So I asked him if he was playing me. He told me he wasn’t but he thought we should break up because we weren’t working. When I asked him why it wasn’t working he told me it was because we didn’t talk and that it was my parents and he couldn’t see me because he couldn’t afford it.

I don’t know if those are the reasons I don’t know if it was because I didn’t fulfil his sexual needs or my parents were too much to handle but I do want him back. Would you please help me out?

I would also like to know how I’m meant to deal with him when we go on a youth trip together with a few other youth and I’m more than likely going to run into him a few times!

I hope you can help me.
Kiarah

July 21, 2015 at 5:41 pm

Hi Chris.
Well I need help to apply this method to my situation. I know I’m young but my ex and I are 15 yrs old. And he dumped me about 2 weeks ago. He had done this because he said “He didn’t like me because I wasn’t like him.” He is very involved in technology and engineering while I’m trying to major in medical subjects. Anyway, our relationship lasted 5 months and 22 days.. we had constant arguments that he always started. One every month. But he only did it when he was tired and had a long day and couldn’t take the anger out on anything else is what it seemed. Anyway, for a few days after the breakup, we were in contact, with him being the one to text me first until one day he got mad at me, and we argued, and then he apologized and started acting sentimental. We didn’t talk for the whole day after, until he texted me with “Wow it’s funny How I have to text you in order for us to talk. That shows How Much you really care and let’s me know where we stand.” So basically he made it seem.like I had to text him first, although we aren’t dating. So that was about a week ago and we haven’t spoken since last Thursday. And he was being really shallow the whole time we were texting and was giving me alot of answers like “Oh. Ok.” We haven’t spoken in almost a week and I’m not sure what to do. I really want him back obviously, but hes a hard nut to crack. I’m worried If he’s out talking to other girls although he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship and said” Maybe we can try this again later on.” This meaning us in a relationship. I’ve read so many articles abut yet am kinda not getting anywhere or feeling any kind of hope since he isn’t contacting me and I’m in the NC rule time period. Please help.
ana

July 17, 2015 at 7:42 pm

Hi, I and my ex boyfriend broke up about 7 weeks now. We’ve been together for 4 years. We had so many issues during in our relationship. We got engaged and eventually he changed his mind not to get married soon and told me he doesn’t want kids. It broke my heart. He also told me that culture differences is another problem between us. When we broke up I beg many times. He told he doesn’t want to go back in to our relationship and he wants us to move on. I stayed another 2 weeks with him while I am looking for a new place. we had sex a couple times. He told me he just want us stay as friends.
When I moved out, he didn’t txt or call but when we each other we are fine talking like a friend. Is there anyway that i can win him back? that was the question i asked my sister and she told me he have had an encounter with the famous love doctor and i contacted him and he prayed for my relationship and my boyfriend came back to me and my relationship was restored and now we will be getting married soon. Please get to know him and ask for his help on ([email protected]). The love doctor is the best and will help you 🙂
Catherine

June 28, 2015 at 3:00 am

Your article is very interesting, however I can’t seem to apply it to my situation and wondered if you could assist?

My boyfriend of 1.5 yrs dumped me the 2nd time round so suddenly after I asked him if he was using me. You see he had been behaving distantly after I saw him (not the first time) as we are in a long distance relationship. Perhaps he was doing this over a period of time, not skyping face to face, not talking to me in the evening, always providing me with some BS excuse as to why why why!

Yes I do feel he is egotistical and does occasionally lie (I picked up on a few lies when I last saw him) and he is a poor communicator. What hurts me the most is that I feel he took advantage of me when he was in a rut in his life and he has now managed to get his life on track and decided he longer has a use for me so to speak. I invested a lot of time and money into making this relationship work and so as you can imagine I was blind-sided, almost as though he had planned for it to end by making it appear to be my fault.

I have decided to move on. There is no point wasting any more time on somebody that doesn’t want me, or does he?

I cut my contact from him but I have found him to contact me every 1.5 weeks or so to check up on me and ask me how I’m doing. I don’t understand why? I mean, i suspect he has another woman which is why he refused to talk to me about my concerns and insecurities and would keep berating me and yelling at me for a week.

Can you please explain this behaviour? I am at odds end. Yes I have replied to him but now I feel I don’t need this any more. He hasn’t apologised, he hasn’t brought up the last blow up, I’m confused as to why he would still want to maintain contact although it is minimal bread crumbs.

I am open to giving it a 3rd go but really I think I am wasting my time.

Your feedback is highly appreciated.

Chris Seiter

July 16, 2015 at 6:28 pm

I am going to ask you a pretty basic question.

If you give this a go a third time what is going to change?

What can you do differently than you did from the first two times.

sam

June 19, 2015 at 1:15 pm

hi chris..i hav been in a relation wid my bf for an year.he z my second bf.my frst relatn brokeup.day bfr yesterday he broke up wid me.actually we used to had lots of fights n arguments during one year.even frm d beginning he tried to breakup wid me several times.evry tym he decides to breakup wid m,i always used to beg him.i never had any idea of breakup.bt he always had an idea of breakup.he used to scold me unparliamentarily bt i never thought of breaking up wid him.i too scolded him.weneva a fight occurs btwn us he never tried to solve it.he always tried to break our relatn.each time v fight,he threatened me of breaking our relat.i used to beg him bc i love him a lot.fr me he z more imp than my ego n self respect.i value him a lot.i cried a lot fr him.bt he never recognises dat.stil i m begging him to stay wid me.he stil says it was my fault.it was not only my fault.it was his fault too.bt he never admits dat.k dats not abig deal.i hav even agreed dat i hav done d mistake.bt he z nt getting convinced at all.i m stil begging him.he openly said dat he dnt want to b in love wid me.he cnt love me anymore.bt i cnt get over him..i tried a lot to forget him.wats more strange z dat even though he hurts me a lott,i stil want him back in my lyf.i m dyng every sec wid his memories.i cnt forget him.i stil want him no matter how he hurts me.i dnt know y??wat shud i do nw.evrythng appears blank fr me.i hav no hopes about my lyf.wen i want him back i m begging y cnt he understand.i feel it unnecessary to stay alive bcz i love him n i got hurt fr dat.unable to cncentrate on anythng..i cnt forget dis guy.bt he can suddenly forget evrythng n treatng me as a frnd.he says gettng back together z imposible.i fl lyk dying.plz help me
Kel

June 7, 2015 at 4:14 pm

Hey,
So my boyfriend of almost 2 years had recently broke up with me. Yes, we are both 17, a lot of people have told me “you’re young” “don’t worry” but I do. I am crazy about this guy and almost two years is a lot. We have been arguing A LOT and he has been distant from me … Today marks two weeks and it’s so hard to ignore him or try not to contact him. I want to get him back because I love him like crazy. I want him back so we can work this all out, not from where we left off but start from the beginning. I have made a lot of mistakes by neglecting him, saying no to go out and stuff but I know that if I had chance to re-do it all I would. He never told me how he felt when he was upset and I have a feeling that was also the cause. He stopped being sweet and complimenting me and he thought I was suffering, I never was. He said we weren’t moving forwards only backwards and I want him back I want to start over and I don’t know what to do. Friends have been telling me he will come back by himself but I am losing hope. I know it sounds like another high school drama but to me it’s not he was really, really important to me! I don’t know if I should just give up, or keep fighting. I love him and want him back, please help! I have been reading all these articles how to get him back and they are very helpful but then again I am in a different situation. Please, please help
aayushi

June 7, 2015 at 7:55 am

hi
i broke up wit my boyfriend and am really happy because its better to b alone rather than crying everyday only because he wont talk or care for us
Jess

June 4, 2015 at 11:27 pm

Hi Chris,
I wanted to ask for your help. My boyfriend and I had been dating for a little over a year and lately he broke up with me. We had been arguing and I was on my period so I was a little more hotheaded than normal and threatened to break up with him. That night he broke up with me and Ive been heartbroken. I didnt come across your website until today and I didnt follow the no contact rule and I told him I still loved him and wanted us and I told him I was in the process of changing the bad habits he always hated and I told him that we want the same things. I may have said them too much. He finally agreed to consider getting back together but took three days and he just pretended things didnt happen. Anyway, today, I told him again once more that i wanted to fight for us and the reasons why I wanted to get back together and he said ” You know what no. It’s not going to happen. You’ve made up my mind for me. I don’t want a relationship at all right now.” Did I screw it up beyond repair? What can I do to get him back? How do I stop being so clingy and show him I’m not so clingy anymore? Can you please help?

Thank you
Katy

June 1, 2015 at 11:39 am

Hello there
I wonder if you can help me I’m pretty distraught.
So I have been in a relationship…you could say tumultuous for a year and 9 months. I am a mature woman 37, who has a good career great friends and family and still enjoys to party etc. I was with my boyfriend who will be 40 in September. We have not been getting on for so long months and months and I would go over to see him at the weekend and we would argue I would end up leaving or he would tell me to leave again and again every week for the past 2 months! I pissed him off I went out with some friends he’s very jealous (Virgo) I am an Aries, I was in a club, pregnant not drinking etc and he went bananas he found out and kept calling me and I didn’t answer I just text him as what was the point he would just shout at me! OMG this sounds so ridiculous like we are teenagers. Anyway after that event a couple of weeks back he did not contact me…we had already argued and I had left on the Tuesday morning so he went on to not contact me for a week at all…I text called nothing…may I add that it has been such a crazy relationship and I have sent some nasty text messages but in response to his actions. Anyway moving on to just over a week ago I went to a party and bumped into him…he came over and kissed me on the lips and asked how I was if I was looking after myself I’m pregnant and I was like fine. He then went on to try and talk to me and his friends would come over and try and tell him to walk away…pathetic I know for one them getting involved but two him not asking them to please leave us alone..not that it was the best situation to talk in a club. Anyway it ended in disaster his friends were verbally abusive to me and we all ended up leaving the club…again I know absolute madness! I had my 3 month scan last Tuesday and this was a couple of days after the incident..he didn’t turn up..maybe because of all the madness or he just couldn’t be bothered! So the day after the scan last Wednesday he texts me to say why I couldn’t send the pic of the baby to him he doesn’t know (well he didn’t turn up) and thanked me for sending it to his parents. I said so you want the baby but don’t want to be with me. He text back saying – Katy we just don’t get on we’ve tried and tried and it doesn’t work I can’t take the abuse and arguments anymore its making me ill and not good for either of us or the baby! ~Now to me that is not trying that was a smack in the face. Yes we have been getting on terribly for months, but I am sure we could somehow work on it if we both wanted to! So I am pregnant 14 weeks and he doesn’t seem like he wants to know. After that cold text I received I did send some nasty messages back including I don’t know if I can do this but look after yourself. Now since last Wednesday I have blocked him so he cannot contact me except leave me a voicemail but he is unable to text which he does more as he doesn’t like talking on the phone much. So that’s it…what do I do now? I know our relationship turned toxic, but I still love the asshole and would like to try because of the baby. I have booked a holiday and am going in 2 weeks so I am looking forward to this. What do I do please help? Thank you Katy
beauty Queen

May 27, 2015 at 3:06 pm

it has been a year since I lost my one and only boyfriend in the world so I am trying 2 win him back but I don’t know how 2 win him
chi

May 27, 2015 at 8:16 am

my bf broke up with me last tues. said he still loves me and cares for me not is no longer in love with me. he said he needs to re center and re focus. he works crazy hours and have been stressed out and that i added to his stress, being around me stresses him out and he wants to get away. we argue a lot and i have picked fights in public before.
i asked him if he would re visit the possibility of us once he re centers, he says he is not against the idea of re visiting if we both single but he doesn’t want me to wait. and he also doesn’t want me to change for him.

but he still came to help with smoke detector, then i lost it and asked to be back. he said he needs time , nothing has changed. he brushed me off saying we can re visit later. then i did the crazy ex thing that very night and called him 10+ times one night but he was already sleeping and txt next day a simple i was asleep.

today he was asking my friend to find someone else to go in his place to a restuarant that we cannot cancel on, so i lost it and txt him and asked whether he dislikes me so much he can’t have dinner with me and friends. then i txt him how i think we could still work out… and i wrote him a super long email of my plan of attack to work things out and for him to think about our past etc.

oh man, did i completely mess up!!?? what can I do now to still win him back? he said he would be happy for me if i date other ppl and go out, but if i did would that actually make him want me back?

I will see him in 3 days at a mutual friend’s bday… what is the best thing to do to get attention from him and plant the seed??
Lucy

May 26, 2015 at 1:33 am

He left me because he loves his ex, ” the problem is that i love my ex and whenever I see a girl, or I am with a girl, I think of her and I can’t stand it, and the other problem is that I see her every day. I’m trying to get her out of my mind and heart but I just can’t”
That is what he said, and what should I do ? I really want to get back with him for a decent amount of reasons which I am not willing to talk about here and now.
Sally

May 14, 2015 at 11:18 pm

Hi Chris,

My bf and I broke up a week ago after an extremely heated argument. I’ve been reading your website (which is fabulous by the way). He is 23 and I’m 30 and the last month I’ve been going through a really hard time with losing my job and my grandmother being very sick in hospital. We have been arguing a lot in the last month and because I’ve been an emotional wreck and he doesn’t deal with it very well. We are both hot headed but before this we got along so well, shared the same hopes and dreams, a got along famously with his family and he did with mine. He is/was also amazing with my 5 year old. We were together for about 6 weeks the first time around broke up for about 6 weeks and got back together for 5 months until last week. He has said that he loves me and wanted to marry me one day. He lived with me about 90% of the time.
Unfortunately I had to break the no contact rule as he still has things here and I wrote back an emotional message asking him if this is what he really wants? His reply was ‘he thinks it’s for the best and wished me luck in the future’. Which I thought was positive because when we argue he usually doesn’t say nicest things.
I spoke to his dad just today and thanked him for everything he has done for me and my child, and his dad said he honestly thought we would be together forever, which made me feel so sad and even more sorry our relationship has ended.
He is coming to get the last of his stuff tomorrow and leaving the key (I won’t be home).
Do you think I have any chance of getting him back? Or should I just walk away and call it a day?

Chris Seiter

May 19, 2015 at 5:29 pm

I wrote an article talkign about how good of a chance you have. You might want to check that out.

Kirsty

May 11, 2015 at 12:28 pm

H Chris,
Really happy I stumbled across your site and thanks for writing such a great article. I would really appreciate some advice from someone like yourself who deals with this but is impartial to my situation. I’d been in a relationship with Jon for a couple of months. He’s 35, I’m 27, he’s been single for 3 years, myself 1. Genuinely have to say best relationship I’ve been in – we were open and honest, wanted the same things in life, and 99% of the time together was happy. I’ve honestly never laughed so hard or made someone laugh so hard back. I felt comfortable and that he liked me for me. We met friends, stayed over, he even went as far to buy me a toothbrush, tell me he was excited about where we were going and that people had told him how happy he seemed lately. Bank holiday weekend we spent most of it together which was lovely. A picture of us went up on facebook on the Sunday which he tagged himself in. The first day we weren’t together (Tuesday) he seemed distant. He then had a panic and said he was worried we were at the stage of meeting parents and he wasn’t there yet and it made him realise he is unprepared for a relationship / bad timing. I’m confused – we’d agreed to take things slow (I’ve been hurt in the past and because of how happy Jon and I were saw no reason to rush, and let it develop naturally) and we hadn’t once mentioned meeting parents. He went to his mum’s Tuesday and I’m wondering if she knows about us and applied some pressure? She’s often asked him about when he will have a relationship / grand kids and now that he suddenly had a gf I wondered if comments had been made. I told him I wasn’t at the stage of meeting parents either, but he ended things. Yesterday I had a text saying that he thought the world of me, he just wasn’t in that place / bad timing. And then one describing me as a person: 27, hot, likes marvel, has a degree. But I would add, funny, kind, beautiful, intelligent, amazing in bed and gorgeous.x” I’m so confused. How can he honestly say or mean those things but not want to be together. I could really do with advice on what I’m meant to do now. Please help?
Tiarne

May 6, 2015 at 8:04 am

Hello, my name is Tiarne.

My boyfriend of 17 months broke up with me two weeks ago and we have still been speaking- some good conversations and some bad.

We have almost every class together and work together and do karate together.

My plan is to start the no contact rule but i was wondering if i reply to him whilst at school and such so i dont seem rude and then ignore him if he tries to contact me while im at home, will it still work?
Rockchick

May 5, 2015 at 5:14 am

Is there any possibility that my ex will come back to me after he broke up with me becsuse he told me he is fed up with our arguments and fightings how to deal with it he’s not contacting me and the moment he broke up with me i agreed and i dont contact him as well
Stacy

May 5, 2015 at 1:10 am

Hello,

So it’s been about 5 weeks since my ex boyfriend broke up with me. I haven’t spoken or seen him since then. This is out 2nd time breaking up. The 1st time he broke up with me because he said he didn’t trust, but then 3 weeks later he texted me saying he couldn’t live with out me, so we got back together. Then 3 months later he broke up with me over the same reason. For some reason I don’t believe this excuse because the night before I asked if he wanted to be with me and he said yes. He also started working a lot and every time he would call me he would be in a bad mood. So then he broke up with and blocked me on social media stuff, but he does this every time when we get into a argument so it’s not surprising. Also he is still friends with my cousin on Facebook. I’m not sure if he has moved on or thinks about me. He also sent 2 of my things through mail because he said if he sees me he will want to get back with me. He also has his stuff at my house.I’m not sure what to do at this point. I still want to be with him. Please help me!!
Monica

May 4, 2015 at 4:02 am

Hi Chris,

I’ve reading a few of your articles and I think you’re brilliant. I started dating this awesome guy, we work on the same company, but not together, we live far away, and we both have children from exes, so we have tight schedules when it comes to dating.

Everything seemed to go really good for around two months. Suddenly he started to stay quiet and a little indifferent to me.I was obseving, for a week, and then I decided to text him… “I’m not good at these things, But I feel something is going on”, and I got no answer. Sometimes he talked me but just like checking up on me. So I told him one day… “Hey, I can call you tonight so we can talk” and he told me “ok” I asked him for a time to call him and as I didn’t get an answer I told him “I’m gonna call you at 9pm”, and again he just answered “ok”. I called him at 9:20 and 9:40 and he didnt answered, then I got so anxious and I text him something like “If you want to talk I’m ready to listen, but I’m not looking for you anymore. I want to know what happens, what bothers you or what you don’t liked, but I can’t do it this way”, So he answered me “I think we should talk, but by cell phone is not a good way”, so the next day I told him “I can stay today for a while after work so we can talk” and he said okay.

When we got to talk I first told him, I’m sorry for my behaviour last night, I’m not mad at you. Then here’s what he said:

I think I understand you, I guess you noticed I was being distant and you don’t know what’s going on. I’ve been analyzing this thing and there are two things I’m worried about: First of all the distance and the time we have to spend together is too little. And the second is that I think we might not be that compatible, I mean we both are so quiet people and I’m afraid we might not be compatible, I think sex is awesome but when it comes to conversation there’s the problem. I’m looking for a serious relationship and before we get more engaged we should stop this, from the road I’ve walked this will go bad and I don’t want to have problems anymore, and I’m also worried because we are coworkers.

What I was just able to say was: Yeah I know distance is a big issue and I would like to have more time to spend together, but is not that easy (btw I don´t have a car so I depend on buses). Regarding our personalities, I know I’m so quiet and stuff (Actually I said a lot of shit). Finally I said: I didn’t want to leave you, because I like you and I care about you and you’re important to me, but if you’re not comfortable or unsure, then fine. I told him that it was so sad because I thought he was worth it.

Do you think it’s worth it if I give a try? I really like this guy, I know there are lots of awesome guys out there, and that I’m not dying without him, but he’s the one I like right now and seems to be the kind of man I would like to have in my life. And I think we didn’t even give it a try, we got to the first problem and he ran away.

Monica

May 4, 2015 at 4:06 am

Oh… and I haven’t saw him or talked to him for 4 days, and I’m just driving crazy, because i don’t know what to do

He has something I left on his appartment and I haven’t asked him to bring me that thing back.

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