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8,582 thoughts on “The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

  1. Scarlet

    September 22, 2020 at 1:36 pm

    Hi so my guy and I have been dating for 5 years, there were a few breaks in there. We were back together, but then lockdown happened and some other things which ultimately lead to us separating in June we hadn’t talked until late August when I reached out because I had had time to realize I need him and want him more than I knew. He had already started another relationship, but broke it off with her after I reached out and we began seeing each other again. He began telling me how much he loved me and how happy he was to have me back. Well after 3 weeks he began acting distant and not really asking me to hang out as much and when I questioned him about it he said he was feeling off and felt that our bond was no longer there. I asked him what he wanted to do about it and he said he needed some space. We decided to wait a week and then spend the following weekend together with just him and I. He has not spoken to me since we had that conversation 3 days ago and I’m very concerned that this is not going to end well. HELP!!!

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      October 6, 2020 at 10:16 am

      Hi Scarlet, you need to allow your guy to have some space! Working on yourself in that time. Read more articles that are relevant to your situation and apply this information. The most important factor is that you put yourself first and aim to become the Ungettable girl

  2. Andrea

    September 19, 2020 at 7:13 am

    Thank you for giving such detailed and helpful advice before one even reads your books, its a great appetiser for what lies ahead. You’re honestly amazing

  3. Andrea

    September 19, 2020 at 7:12 am

    You’re honestly amazing and really helpful, thank you for giving such detailed preadvice even before one has read your books

  4. Buhle

    September 16, 2020 at 8:10 am

    I have been dating my bf for 7 months of which they were good. We had our great times together but my problem is that I have anger issues from the past Hurst. Of which sometimes if be sarcastic with him or talk back at him or raise my temper with him. He was very patient with me and we loved each other very much. He introduced me to his friends and family and I also introduced him to my parents. The last time we had we had a fight about my anger issues was in June that is when he started distancing himself from me. When we spoke about it his words were “I tried to bring myself to make this relationship work but most of the times I find know if we’re going left or right, I know you love me but this is not working for me”. It tore me apart and when I call him he would say “give this relationship sometime, work on yourself only time will tell if you changed or not”. But recently he is not calling or texting, nothing. He even ignores my calls. He told his friends that he loves me but I should work on my behavior. But I think that he has a GF now as his cousin told me. How do I win my man back? I honestly love him and regret ever being that harsh with him. I didn’t do it on purpose though, mostly it was because I was loosing my job of which I took out my frustrations on him. Please help. I’m on no contact at the moment since Sunday it’s now my 4th day. Please help.

  5. Elly

    September 13, 2020 at 1:30 pm

    my boyfriend broke up with me last September 11,2020. We supposedly 5 yrs in relationship next month. He said, We need to rest. He have a lot of pain in his heart. He needs time. And I really want him back. What should I do?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      October 2, 2020 at 9:05 pm

      Hi Elly, start following the program starting with a No Contact

  6. Aaku

    September 10, 2020 at 1:10 pm

    My boyfriend broke up with me because he thinks that i am cheating him. He dont want to talk to me. I gave him time about a week but he doest want me back in his life. what should i do to get him back and bulid trust in him ….

  7. Jesselle Calanday

    September 8, 2020 at 2:29 pm

    My boyfriend broke up with me 7 days ago. Now looking back on the messages I sent him after that for 5 days straight I can say that I sounds so crazy and absolutely needy and desperate. I just finished reading what has been written in here and wow It made me feel a lot better. Since, we aren’t talking for two days now and we are not friends on any sort of social media’s, I’ll absolutely apply the no contact rule from now too. I am missing him though but after reading about no contact rule and what should and I shouldn’t do after break up, I think I learned a lot. Thankyou so much 🙂

  8. Sophie

    August 29, 2020 at 11:56 am

    Hello. I started seeing a wonderful man in October last year. Things were going great. We went on regular dates and were in touch daily. Then the pandemic hit. We both live with parents and we haven’t seen each other since March. We have stayed in touch this whole time and then last week he said he’s starting to lose feelings. It’s not surprising as we can’t see each other due to lockdown. There was no big fallout, we had an honest chat and he said he can’t be in this limbo state of not being able to date me but maybe we should meet up after lockdown depending where we are both at in our lives. He said the situation with me was making him anxious. He listed all the reasons I’m perfect for him and said he wishes we’d met after the pandemic so we could have had a proper shot. We haven’t spoken since we had that chat a week ago. I’m devastated. I feel it’s been taken away from us and I don’t know what to do. We did at one point talk about meeting up during lockdown but decided we didn’t want to see each other from a distance so we didn’t bother. I don’t know what to do now. We hadn’t defined our relationship before all this but we were just at the exciting dates stage. I am still in local lockdown but he is not. I miss him. Please help…

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      September 11, 2020 at 8:09 pm

      Hi Sophie, I would suggest that you go into a no contact now and work on yourself in that time, you’ve had an emotional conversation so ideally you would need to hit the reset button with the NC.

  9. Sally

    August 29, 2020 at 10:15 am

    Me and my boyfriend broke up a month ago because I caught a text message on his phone from another girl that saying she loves him. He never accepted cheating on me and blamed me for not trusting him. He dumped me immediately. We had on and off relationship a few years back and he had a few girls during this time. He is older than and lives 2 hours away from me. Our relationship was very good at the beginning, but after I got something from him, I needed to get treatment and we could not sleep together for 6 months. During this time I think he found someone to sleep. Now, he is not picking up my phone and not replying my texts. Eventually, he blocked me. Do you think he will call me again and want to come back to me again?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      September 7, 2020 at 9:36 pm

      Sally, it sounds like you need to accept that he is not that good of a guy if he is cheating on you and then blames you for it! He’s given you an STI and STILL cheats. Run sweetie, you can find better!

  10. Merlinda

    August 28, 2020 at 4:44 am

    My ex (21) and I (19 we are actually just a year apart in age but his birthday already passed during the no contact phase) we were together for very little over a year. Recently he had been getting more tired and not willing to go out as much as his work hours had gotten longer and he was now working weekends as well (he previously had them off and usually would be home on weekdays at 3 but now it’s like 6 or even 8) (he is a construction working working for his dad) in the beginning of our relationship he was very sweet and used always tell me how much he loved me and missed me when I was away and he looked forward to seeing me. he was always tired and I cut him a lot of slack and tried not to given him crap for always cancelling because I knew work was taking a toll on him and he wanted to help his dad because he felt it was his job to keep his dad work light for his dads well being. We always talked about what we wanted out of life like we already had an idea of what we wanted in regards of when to get married kid names and house with dogs and such. He at first asked me to break up temporarily he said it needed to be a break up because he needed to be single but he promised he would be back in three weeks. Cut to a week and a half in he breaks up with me for real through text and then a phone call because I called him. He said he needed to figure some things out and work on himself and that during this time he didn’t want to be with any girls other than for being friends but he told me to move on at my own pace because he didn’t want me waiting for him because he didn’t know how long it would take. He also asked if he could keep “certain pictures of me” I didn’t care so I said sure. He also joked about friends with benefits and I said idk maybe but I don’t think I could not string a attached and he said you won’t know if you don’t try. He said that he talked to him brother and felt maybe we were right people just wrong time and said we should try and be friends after like a month. Two days later I got pushed into calling him by a guy friend and he said that it was too soon he yelled at me through text saying forget about being friends. He said that my friend was just making things worse and simpin for me. He said the message was too soon. And during this messaging he also said a month would have been perfect. (Idk if he meant that as in getting together or to try and be friends) but later that night he messaged me saying he was sorry for being rude but it was too early I told him I was sorry about pushing and how my friend had jumped in. I told him to take care and he told me goodnight take care. I have done the no contact for about three weeks now I and going to do it for a month so after sept 5th my no contact period of 30 days is up but idk what to do. We agreed to keep each other on social media but then 1 week and a half into the no contact his brother unfollowed me on Instagram and then so did he and then so did his other brother. I gave no reaction. He still has me on Facebook and what apps and I still have his number. I don’t use Facebook or WhatsApp often and he has stopped watching any statues I post on WhatsApp. Idk what to do. During this period of no contact I thrived to be better talking and hanging out with friends more living a more fun life finishing my college semester (note he broke with me the week of my dads 2nd death anniversary which he knew and right before final exams but I pulled through) I also got a tattoo (for me nothing related to him) his sister still followed me on Instagram but he only sees my posts not stories I’m pretty sure he isn’t using he to check up on me. I know our relationship wasn’t pretty I definitely was insecure for a time but I had moved past that but I know had pushed him away at times but that was a while back. I want to get him back. And I have been watching and reading everything on getting your ex back and idk if anyone could give me advice it would be extremely appreciated. I know I don’t need him to be happy in life but I want him in life. I’m a person that life has kicked in the ass a lot and he knew this and said that we would be together forever and that was a fact and he would not fade like every other thing in my life

  11. E

    August 5, 2020 at 3:19 pm

    My love and I met when he was working abroad a year ago (18 aug), and was trying to move back here to me (uk). Things didnt go well (my ex is to present, I got clingy, he got jealous) and he stepped back… for 2mths! For the last 6wks he didnt see me or call but texted daily. Sometimes it was a good chatty flirty day, sometimes a bad silent or squabbling day. Eventually he asked me out for dinner. We were going last Friday but then he said to stay at his to avoid the virus… I said but I want to go out as I’ve bought a new dress specially… he said let’s postpone it till saturday. BUT… I was dressed and couldnt take another day of waiting… I turned up. At his house. 1am!!! He was very angry. He let me stay but on the sofa. We did talk and I did explain a lot and he seemed to listen and we chatted for hours in the morning about his Hope’s and dreams in life. But then he just said he felt I was trapping him and I shouldnt have come and was causing him stress. He actually asked me to leave… even though originally we were spending the weekend together. I left. He continued to message me 5 times that day and I apologised saying I felt silly and had misread the situation and thought i was being cute turning… he said not to feel bad he just had to sort himself out now… later he brought up my ex on fb again and I responded suggesting we talk.

    Sunday morning he messaged for the final time. No passion. No jealousy. No future. Just an apology about his previous text and that what I did in my life was not his business.

    I didnt respond. He hasn’t contacted. Do I have a chance? Could I have killed it in one blow? Can NC help me now?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      August 5, 2020 at 11:38 pm

      Hey E, if you start following the information on this website and use it to show your ex you are doing great (using social media to show what you are doing with your life) and then reach out to your ex at the end of your No Contact period to reconnect and then rebuild your connection, understand that this program is a process that you need to follow with a lot of self control and patience.

  12. Mari

    August 4, 2020 at 12:22 pm

    My boyfriend of eight years broke up with me about two weeks. He said that he he needed to find himself, that I deserved better, and that if we were meant to be we would be. A week later he texted me saying that he wants to be there for me and I can contact him whenever and that all he has for me is love. I havent contacted him since then because I was trying to give him space. But yesterday he went on social media and posted saying he was now single and over the whole love thing. I know he is trying to get my attention but our lives were so intertwined, we still have our phone lines connected together. This is the second time we break up . Im just so confused because we started talking about marriage and kids and what not. Im not sure what to do or if theres still a chance for us?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      August 11, 2020 at 7:03 pm

      Hey Mari, so for him to post something like that at the time then he must have been feeling emotional about the situation and wanted to reassure himself that he was sure of his decision. It is just showing his emotions slightly. Make sure that you are following a no contact before you speak with him again and do not watch things that he posts online for some time, its not your fault if it is on news feed for example, but no going to his page directly or watching his stories.

  13. Christine

    July 28, 2020 at 8:55 am


    My boyfriend and I were together for almost 2 years. Yesterday was our 2nd year anniversary. He broke up with me 3 weeks ago. We were in a long-distance relationship but we moved in together 6 months prior to the breakup. He lost his job and was struggling to find something new that he can work on. In the process, we started to grow apart as he became very bitter towards his whole situation and I became the victim of his constant bickering. And then the pandemic happens, and I was asked to work from home. And with this arrangement, we are literally together 24/7. Which made the situation of our relationship worst as we basically do not have our own space. We fought a lot, mostly about his frustration about him not liking his situation, etc. He never once spoke about our fights etc. Then 3 weeks ago, he decided that he had enough of my country and decided to fly back to his home country and said that is the end of our relationship. When I asked him the reason for the breakup, he said he just does not love me anymore. We had a big fight. I begged, cried, try to talk him out of the breakup, but nothing works. He seems very clear about his decision. But 3 days before he left, we managed to talk things out and promise each other to spend the last 3 days of us together remembering those good times we had. And we did, like as if we hadn’t broken up. He told me that he loves me and gave me a tight hug, right before he board the car to the airport. Since he left, he contacted me every day to check on me and asked me how I am doing. He said he is struggling himself, but he kept saying, in time, both of us will be OK. I remained in contact with him, but my messages to him are mostly short and only reply a few hours after his message. But one day, I lose it and asked him about him telling me that he loves me before he left and if he meant it. He said he meant it, but that does not mean we need to be together. And since then, I did not reply to any of his messages after that. He was worried and asked me to please reply to him.

    I replied to him after 4 days and told him I needed space. He understands. Since then, he initiated to message me every day without fail. The messages are normally about normal daily stuff that we normally share. Nothing about getting back together etc.

    So my question is, where do I go from here? I would really love to have him back. But I am not understanding his intention by maintaining contact but not wanting to talk about our relationship. Every time I bring it up (first week of the break-off), he will always say, let’s work and focus on ourselves first and let’s see how it goes. Do I just play along and reply to his messages and move on and work on myself? Or do I just ignore and initiate the no contact rule? Do you think he still has feelings for me and needed time to sort out himself before he can focus on our relationship? I do not know what to feel right now.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      August 11, 2020 at 8:50 pm

      Hi Christine, we actually suggest in this program that you reach out and have conversations with your ex about interests of theirs and just general interesting conversations where also say do not speak about your past relationship, the break up or about getting back together. This is about re connecting and getting to know them again without making it about “getting them back” for the short term. You need them to invest time in talking to you and getting to know you again realising they made a mistake to leave you

  14. VS

    July 27, 2020 at 9:28 pm

    My boyfriend and I were together for two and a half years. We were working on moving out together and once we made that final decision it seemed as though things began to fall apart. Our conversations were only about one thing and it was a constant back and forth. I couldn’t unsee us not living together but still being together and I feel like that pushed him away even more. To the point that he says he’s “unhappy” and “doesn’t feel the same anymore”. It’s been three weeks since the break up but we’ve been in contact one way or another (still with the back and forth). Is there a chance that this program will work? I’m still in hope that things could work out for us and scared to lose him.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 27, 2020 at 9:41 pm

      Hey VS yes the program can work but it must start with a strict No Contact where you do not reach out or reply to your ex whatsoever for at least 30days

  15. Dianga

    July 27, 2020 at 12:59 am

    My boyfriend and I had been dating for a year and a half. Things changed when we started living together. He one day told me I should move out and that he doesn’t see the relationship working out. I begged him and did all sort of crazy stuff. He one day told a mutual friend that he never loved me and that he really misses his ex that they dated for six years and that he also regrets breaking up with another ex for me and they had dated for one year. It has been two hectic months since the break up with a lot of ugly things happening. He told a friend that he needs to figure his stuff out but we are completely done. He said after a few months he thinks of rekindling stuff with an ex,he didn’t specify who but made it completely clear that it is not me. I am also trying to figure out why he only brought my clothes back but left other things that solely belong to me in the house and shows no sign of bringing them,still wears his ring that I bought him and some of my hoodies and t shirts. He is also still using my phone that I lent him. If he feels completely nothing for me,why is he still holding on to those stuff? He told a friend that he will be moving to a new town. I wonder what he will do with my stuff? Is there a sign there or something between us that is why he has not let go of my stuff?. Do I still have a chance? I am doing the no contact rule and I am actually on day 4 and determined and committed to do the 30 days.

  16. RC

    July 24, 2020 at 4:20 am

    My bf and I have been in a relationship for 10 years. Last week I got a feeling that something’s off. When we talked 2 days ago, he explained the past one year of our relationship with him has bern hard for him. He started to lose feelings towards me and feels our relationship is flat. Then he met this girl and started to develop feelings for her. He tried to deny that and didn’t pursue with this girl. Until about 5 months ago he decided his feelings for her is something he can’t ignore. Then they’ve started being in a relationship for 4 months. On the other hand, my ex still cares about not wanting to hurt me during this difficult time (pandemic), we do small talk, eat together, but keeping our distance. He planned to tell me once we’re stable post covid-19. Turns out I just found out earlier. We still live together and act normal but only talk when necessary. so not sure how to implement No Contact period. I still want him back despite what happened. Is his current relationship considered as serious/rebound? Do I stand a chance? Will he comes back to me even he told me he chooses her more than I am?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 24, 2020 at 9:31 am

      Hey RC, so rather than think of this as a rebound think of it as grass is greener syndrome. So he thinks she is more exciting, more fun, the “new” thing for him to be happy. Relationships go through dips and hard times. It is always about how you handle the situation at the time. He led you to believe all was well and then he looked for attention from else where. While you are living together you need to follow a limited no contact, but I would suggest that you look for a route so that you are not around each other so much, he may not want to hurt you, but he has. Read articles about limited no contact, grass is greener, and being ungettable.

  17. Z

    July 22, 2020 at 1:07 am

    I was with my ex for 14 years he left a year ago we have two children together we have been through a lot together but he refuses to acknowledge me he makes no effort or contact with our children I have gone beyond the no contact and still he hasn’t contacted me or anything regarding our children I bumped into him a couple of months ago and I was with our children after not seeing them in 10 months ! He wouldn’t look at me or talk to me he only spoke to our children they wanted to go to his house the following day which I agreed to but I had to drop them and wait outside he wouldn’t talk or look at me I have no contact number for him other than his address he doesn’t have my contact number I tried to talk to him saying we have to co parent and I need a contact number when I leave our children with him he would only talk through our eldest child and basically said to them they can come to his house every day anytime whenever they want ! After a week of this I felt like it was controlling then on the last day they saw there dad when I picked them up my son come out crying saying his dad said that myself and him are never getting back together and I have lied everyday to him throughout the whole relationship and that I’m a bad person etc which upset my eldest son who’s 10 my youngest is 5 so I just stopped dropping them off after that he never had them over night it was just a few hours every other day for no more than two weeks ! And it was me who forced the contact because my sons pine for him I never tried to talk to him or anything anyway since then he still hasn’t made zero effort to contact myself or our sons at all ! I want to reach out but have no way other than going to his house which I really don’t want to because if rejection and I don’t want to give him the satisfaction because it’s always me trying my best and doing everything but I’m done with it now ! I just don’t know what to do anymore!? The no contact didn’t change anything and I’m still doing it almost a year minus a month in between!

  18. Hannah

    July 11, 2020 at 8:32 pm

    My boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me a month ago. I sent him a message 9 days ago bringing up a show I know he watches and he sent a funny post to me and I said I liked it but it didnt give any further than that. He says the reason for breaking up was that he didnt feel like we were growing anymore together. But he gave me many mixed signals like I care about you, I want you in my life, if we are both single at 30 we should spend our lives together, our souls will cross paths again. I dont know if I should reach out to him again soon. I care about him so much. I know what went wrong and I have ideas of how things can be fixed. I have never ever had a connection so deep with another person before and I dont want to lose it. We even talked about things like marriage and moving in together after we finished college. Should I try and contact him again?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      August 4, 2020 at 10:14 pm

      Hi Hannah, I would suggest that you try reaching out again but use the texting articles to help you create conversations that are going to help you with your ex

  19. Anne

    June 30, 2020 at 1:08 pm

    Hey. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years but for the past four months have been fighting so much mainly because of me. I hurt him so much that finally he broke up with me, saying the pain and toxicity is too much to carry and he doesnt know how he can trust me enough to open up again. He seems so sure that he won’t be able to come back now but still suggested we could stay friends and try to find friendship again. I dont know how to win him back and how him that I am still the person he fell in love with and that he can trust me. He is depressed and convinced that he is alone now and that he cant be the same with me anymore. We decided to meet up after a few weeks and see but during this time as being friends I want to know how I can make him happy, give him comfort and make him see he can trust me not to fight and hurt again

  20. Frida

    June 29, 2020 at 8:42 am

    My ex and I are talking again a month after out breakup (which he initiated, he said he didnt have the right feelings for me, and I said I agreed). He is really friendly, he says that he still cares for me, asks me how my love life is going and it is almost like the good old days. BUT, every time We talk, he starts «sexting» and talks about How much he misses the sex and that he wants to meet up and have sex. Is there any chance of us getting back together, and What should I do to make this happen?

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 3, 2020 at 11:49 pm

      Hi Frida, so when he starts turning things sexual, you make it clear that you do not sleep with people unless you are in a relationship. Flirting and talking on the phone is still allowed as you want to get him investing in talking to you and spending his time wanting you. Eventually you can suggest meet ups, but make sure that they are in public places and that it is not possible for sexidents to happen

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