The Definitive Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back

8,583 thoughts on “The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

Maki

March 6, 2017 at 12:13 am

My other question is what if he removes me from facebook/Messenger for ignoring his messages. He is a very sensitive guy and takes things to heart or worse still decides to give up and move on?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 9, 2017 at 11:31 am

Hi Maki

He already chose that when he broke up with you.. Now, he’s trying to be friends with benefits with you to get what he wants without the commitment.. If he removes you, just let him be. if you’re going to do the no contact rule, focus in healing and improving yourself.

Maki

March 5, 2017 at 11:58 pm

My boyfriend finished with me two weeks ago and has been sending me mixed signals, the first one being on the day he finished everything he messaged me an hour later to ask if I wanted to go on a bike ride with him on Tuesday(he wrote on the Saturday). When I bumped into him, we live fairly close, he kissed me goodbye on the lips oh we also slept together a couple of times. In short I have had enough and told him that if we’re done then we’re done and I don’t really do the friendship thing but he doesn’t want me out of his life which is what he said and I think is selfish. He invited me to meet up with him to which I declined and he tried again to invite me out when I left. I did not contat him that evening or today . he messaged me this evening to say: ‘ SorryI was going to say that I am not sure if I can write to you, I don’t want you to be angry at me. I thought of you a few times today. Well I don’t want to make this a conversation. Good night. Amor, what should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 9, 2017 at 11:31 am

Hi Maki

He already chose that when he broke up with you.. Now, he’s trying to be friends with benefits with you to get what he wants without the commitment.. If he removes you, just let him be. if you’re going to do the no contact rule, focus in healing and improving yourself.

Nana

March 3, 2017 at 11:59 pm

hi, I bought your book, but I have a bit of a different situation and I dont find the right answer in it. my ex and I were in ldr, we broke up 7 months ago (I initiated, but then he was the one who went till the end with it)… I then still contacted him and he would also for 1 month… then no contact for more than 3 months, when he contacted me with a friendly fb message and I replied 1 week later and then it so happened he was online and we chatted a bit. he left first. :/ then ca. 3 weeks later I texted him stg about a series as recommended and he would not get back at me for more than a week. but it was a long message then. I then replied just shortly and asked stg, but never got an answer…then 1 month later he had a birthday and I sent him a short nice message and also some pic from the internet I thought he would like… again no answer for ca. 1 week, the answer was then again long, he apologized he had a lot to do, thanked and asked me questions about my life… then I replied after 1 week, also sent a long message, asked 1 question, 2 weeks later still no answer.

the problem Im facing is that we have to comunicate on fb (he has no phone) and the messages seem to be more in e-mail direction… I tried to spot him online, but it takes way too much time to wait for that… how can I implement the finnishing the conversation and tide theory, which seem to be the major points of attracting again. how can I proceed, so that the response time would get better?
I was not clingy or needy in any of the messages, I was basically just trying to show my life is good and being friendly… I guess he has zero interest in romance with me now… is there any way to boost things up in this kind of conversation pattern?
thanks for the answer! 🙂

Nana

March 17, 2017 at 7:41 am

Thanks for an answer! 🙂 exactly today is 30 days, time sure is flying. I will try again. So it happens I have stg intresting to say since Im on a trip. 😉
Im way past that phase where I would be just sitting around and feeling bad about myself… I improved my life, regained hobies and Im good, just not over an ex. However, it does not affect me very much in day to day life anymore. I try to look at a break up like stg that was not only bad and that it helped me to be a better person and learm stg from it.
Have a nice day! 🙂
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 21, 2017 at 4:06 pm

thank you! You too!
Nana

March 12, 2017 at 11:22 am

oh, somehow the comment didnt show till I submitted another one, sorry for spamming u! however, from your answer I still dont know how to proceed further? he did not reply to my last message for more than 2 weeks already, I guess he also will not reply at all…
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 15, 2017 at 7:48 am

that’s ok..if you’re in nc now, stick tonit and be very active in improving yourself and in posting in social media.. nc would not help you much if you’re just silent and not improving..after 30 days initiate contact and slowly build rapport
Nana

March 12, 2017 at 11:18 am

hi, I assume my comment got lost, so I will just type it again… 😉 at first when he wrote to me I was not sure if I was ready, I was scarred I would get hurt if things wouldnt go the way I wanted them to go. took me 1 week to decide. and then the other time it I dodnt want to write back instantly, cuz it took him so long to reply and I didnt want to look desprate/waiting for his reply/not having anything to do… since this whole thing is going nowhere, I assume Im doing stg wrong, just dont know what exactly and need your help with it, please. 🙂
Nana

March 8, 2017 at 4:05 pm

I was not sure if I was ready for it… I had to think about it at first.
and the last time, cuz it took him so long and I didnt want to look like I was waiting for an answer. I also was quiet busy and then the time was flying… thanks for an answer!
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 12, 2017 at 9:03 am

That’s ok. At least you can stick to it this time. You’re welcome!
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 4, 2017 at 5:32 pm

Hi Nana,

why did it take you a week later to reply to his fb messages?

Lola

February 27, 2017 at 11:05 pm

Ok so i am 16 and he is 18, we dated for 5 and a half months and still planned ahead days before our breakup ,a couple of days ago my bf texted me saying hes been thinking about something or a while, and asked if we should meet for coffee. I met him 30 minutes after that text and we sat down and i asked “whats wrong?” he told me “look I dont love you, i dont know what i feel for you, the feelings i had for you at the start have just slowly started to decrease, its nothing you did, i just dont feel the same way about you anymore, so i think we should stop seeing eachother”, i coudnt bare to stay any longer i was about to burst into tears, so as i stood up i said this is very hard on me, and as i walked past i said “because i actually love you” i left and didnt hear from him, i saw from snapchat that he had gone out to the club that night with his friend and some female supposed friends, the next evening i texted him, “look i need closure, this cant really be the only reason” to which he responded something along the lines of “It is, its got nothing to do with you, its just that i slowly started to not like you as much anymore, and my liking of you has really decreased this month, it nothing you did, i tried to give it another go but, i just didnt like you like that anymore, and i coudnt stand the fact of giving you this illusion that i like you when i dont anymore, you are a wonderfull person and im sure youlle find someone that thinks the same way about you as you them. lets stay friends and leave on good terms.” I said i guess your right and have officially started NC today. Is it really hopeless if he said he lost his feelings for me? I complemented him consantly while dating, we had allot of sex too and spent three days a week together, he seemed totally fine besides being a little less affectionate which was normal for him since he is a shy inexperienced scorpio. Before he met me he was a virgin and hadnt had a serious relationship like ours. He also chose me out of all the other girls giving him attention and we had a bunch in common and even these last few weeks could still talk about random things for hours and hours because we were way more interested in eachother than the movie. The only thing i can think of that made him mabye leave him is that this last month i started to complain about his lack of affection, which i now believe as a participating factor to the breakup, but it never turned into serious fights because he always said he’d try better or i would end up appologizing for being a bit insecure or moody. for the rest everything seemed perfect and we were a great match. not being modest but i am a very attractive woman who gets quite allot of attention, but he knew i was very loyal and always said i was taken, and he was also a very attractive man who had allot of girls want him and even one try and make him cheat which he told me about and told the girl no. on a scale he was a 9 and i am about a 8.5 if im harsh.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 28, 2017 at 6:46 pm

Hi Lola,

don’t do that to yourself. Do not put yourself in a lower value than anybody else. Do you want to try the advice above? Open the link below too:
The Ungettable Girl

Kimmy

February 25, 2017 at 4:15 pm

Hi there, what should I do if my boyfriend for 9 months brought our relationship to a very emotional ending because he felt like the relationship wasn’t good for him anymore? He was torn about the decision and cried his eyes out when he told me in person, but stuck to his decision nonetheless. I understand now what he meant, we are both in high school and we took things to very high levels in our relationship. We became emotionally dependent on eachother essentially, and that didn’t feel like a bad thing when we were on emotional highs with eachother but whenever we would argue as all couples do, or if there was any sort of issue then it would automatically turn into a much larger problem for us because of that dependency. So I know realize that that relationship had to end because it wasn’t healthy for us to depend on eachother and would have turned into a toxic or possibly emotionally abusive relationship of we continued on the path. But I still love him. I did NC for 3 weeks after the first breakup, and ended up having to reach out to him because I believed he had money of mine that I asked him to hold onto at one point. He politely reminded me that we had spent that money together one day when we went Christmas shopping for our families a few months ago. He then asked me how I was doing, sent me good wishes and we had a nice end to that texting conversation. The next day I found some of his clothes that I still had and he has my work hat so we decided to meet up the next day to exchange them. We hadn’t planned on talking but I did write him a note, he read it right there and seemed very moved by it. We talked about how we’d been since the breakup and he said that his feelings vary day to day but he was mostly sad and nostalgic about everything. We hugged a few times and he rested his hand on my face like he always used to do, this appeared to really have gotten to him and we said a friendly goodbye after discussing what went wrong with our previous relationship and we agreed that if trying again was in our future then the dependency needed to change. He texted me 2 days later saying that he couldn’t get me off of his mind since we had talked because as soon as he touched my face all of the memories came flooding back in. He said that since we were both loyal and were happy with eachother majority of the time that he saw no reason why we couldn’t try again and make things work for a long time like we had talked about. I told him that we couldn’t try again and go through all of those feelings if it were to only squeeze a little bit more time our of our relationship. He agreed and told me that we would stay together this time, communicate better, and both have more of a life outside of just dating eachother which was the healthiest thing that we needed to do. So the next day we discussed all of this before school and left the day back together. I was extremely happy and so was he. We felt like our relationship was getting the 2nd chance we both had wanted and we were able to fix what went wrong to ensure that it wouldn’t happen again. For the following days we were just as close as before. Which felt nice temporarily but we hadn’t realized that we were both just jumping right back in to the old relationship without even knowing it. We hadn’t even had a single fight or overly emotional conversation yet he appeared to be unhappy. So I continued to put more and more effort in to try and make him happy and I am only just now realizing that I was being clingy. About a week into being back together, he felt rather distant to me and I had an extremely bad feeling about that. So I wanted to talk after school one day as he promised we would hang out but instead he hung out with his friends. Now, I try not to be overbearing or controlling but I was genuinely upset that he ditched me so early on into the relationship when we had things that needed to be discussed that day, otherwise I would have been all for him seeing his friends because he rarely did in our relationship before and I saw that was an issue for him and wanted him to be more social because I had always admired his extremely social and friendly side. He got defensive (this is all over text) and told me to stop acting the way that I was. He then said that he was trying to be happy but he just didn’t feel fulfilled with our relationship and that he was going to shut his phone off for the night so that he could think. I knew exactly what he was doing. I knew that if he shut off his phone and didn’t communicate with me that night through what he was thinking that he would come to the decision to break up. And I was exactly right. The next morning he found me and told me that he just wasn’t happy and felt that we were ‘chasing memories’ and my heart just broke. He was cold and distant about it, didn’t convey a shred of emotion and just didn’t seem himself at all especially because I know how much he hates hurting people and couldn’t bear doing that to me again if he knew what I was feeling.I begged. I reminded him of the promises, that we promised to really make things work this time and communicate so these things wouldn’t happen. But he still ended it. He blocked me on Facebook and Fb messenger, but I’m fairly sure I still have him on text and definitely on Instagram so I know that future communication isn’t completely impossible. I realize that we both are still young and have so much to learn, and I wouldn’t ever want to be in a relationship with him if I felt that it was bad or unhealthy for either of us. I’ve stuck to NC for 2 weeks now, he hasn’t reached out and so I plan to reach out in 2 weeks. I’m just not sure if all hope is lost now because we didn’t take advantage of the 2nd chance like we should have. We didn’t start out new like we should have or slowly adapt to a healthy relationship together like we should have. I’ve read tons of your articles and watched tons of your videos and am working on myself a lot. I have a new job, I’m doing well in school, trying to change my look and build more friendships to really create a new and more attractive me that I know he would fall in love with. He’d fall in love with me if we were strangers, but does our history destroy the hope of reattraction? I’ve really strengthened myself and become independent and feel like so much better of a person now and am actually ready now and understand the new meaning of our old relationship being dead. But I’m more afraid that any effort I make to reach out to him will be either ignored or he’ll automatically know that I want to get back together so what should I do to come across as strictly friendly and not needy anymore? I want a strong relationship with him more than anything and know that we are both worth this fight and both needed to improve ourselves and to grow as people rather than being stuck in a potentially toxic relationship. So any advise for a new beginning with someone who may view you as bad for them because I hadn’t changed enough the first time around? How do I make him look for as bright future with me rather than just as the our dark past? Any help is appreciated!

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 25, 2017 at 8:17 pm

Hi Kimmy,

That’s why you have to genuinely improve yourself. If you’re very different from the person he knew, then he wouldn’t see the past in you. Do new things and make new friends, widen your world. Be active in posting in social media even if you’re blocked. That’s what matters more. After nc, continue improving yourself and take it slow in building rapport.

Natalie

February 22, 2017 at 9:46 am

Hi

My ex and I started dating 6 months ago. The relationship was good and we were into each other. Even though we would argue often, but we would always understand each other in the end. Had a lot of respect and love.
Now about 2 weeks back, we had a massive fight and in the middle of the fight in a rage of anger I used a curse word. He didn’t talk to me for a day after that, fought a lot later and was really disappointed that I used the curse word. I apologized so he didn’t break up with me then but after 1 week of the episode he shot the gun. He told me that he cannot see a future with me because I used such language. He never expected me to do that, so he is in shock and decided to break up. I asked him to forgive me but he refused and said that he will never be able to overcome the fact that I spoke to him in such a bad way.
So I accepted his decision of break up and started the No Contact the very next day. Its been 5 days, he hasn’t initiated any contact. I am confused should I continue with the no contact or should I apologize and try to calm him down.

Please suggest. Thanks.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 22, 2017 at 11:28 pm

Hi Natalie,

You already apologized.. No contact is for you. Let’s hope he does cool down after 30 days, but this time, be active with yourself. Improve yourself.

k

February 22, 2017 at 7:29 am

hi
my bf ignored me n I broke up. he was too needy. I live at home and he’s in hostel.he wants sex on video call n I gave once when I was alone. my parents oppose a relationship .he asked again for same. I told that parents are at home.he postponed. I lied that I had period because I was scared of parents. he ignored me n never replied. it happened on Feb 11 n 13 I got period. I broke up on 16 Feb. now I want him back….

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 22, 2017 at 11:09 pm

Hi K,

how old are you both and how long have you been together?

Fiona

February 21, 2017 at 3:40 pm

February 21, 2017

Hi. My ex and I have been split for 8 months and we were together 11 months and we were really getting serious and planning a life together after both of us finish school. Before my ex I was in long committed for 4 years and engaged for 2. I came out from that relationship really broken and stayed single for 1 and half. My ex and I go to the same church and we became friend prior to us dating. I wasn’t so sure about us becoming a couple and I had some trust issues during that time. He was really understandable about my trust issues and promises to be patient. I accepted to give a chance in love again after 11 months together with our ups and downs like all couple my ex decided to end our relationship. Long story short, the week before the split, we argued and did not speak to each other for a week. I then I received a text message from him asking for a “break” It was unexpected from me because it was just a little fight and not a reason to end a serious relationship. The reason he gave me was “it’s not you but me” I knew from experience that it was not the really reason. I was not accepting the breakup I even begged him to stay ( I know I shouldn’t have not beg still regret it but I was desperate at the moment and never apologised for it) at that moment I was just seeing that as another failed relationship and was questioning myself. I finally accepted the breakup, blocked him on everything. However we both go to the same church and could not avoid not seeing every Sunday and apply the “no contact” rule. But after 8 months still can’t get over him I even tried to date other people, was in relationship with someone for 4 months and I can’t stop thinking about him. Recently we start talking again, just small conversation in church and I realised that we really had something special, we connected without even being intimate (sexually) and the way we look at each other in church and sometimes I can feel his eyes on me without me looking back. I found myself thinking maybe we can get that back and start a new relationship. However considering that we both go to same church where everyone talk to everyone we all like a big family so it make impossible to apply the “no contact” rule so how do I go from there?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 22, 2017 at 7:53 pm

Hi Fiona,

approach it like this one:
EBR 032: What To Do If You Work With Your Ex Boyfriend

Tash

February 21, 2017 at 7:46 am

Hi amor actually he replied back last night after a good 8 hours saying this. “Hey thats nice, good times. Im good thanks hope your great too.” But I don’t know if I should reply because I feel like he’s being distant and don’t really know what to say after that.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 21, 2017 at 8:25 pm

HI Tash,

you should end reply back to end the conversation and then start a new convo by the end of the day again or the next day at the same time that he replied today.

Tash

February 20, 2017 at 6:46 pm

Hi amor,
After no contact, I text my ex saying that I saw a puppy and it reminded me of the time when he sent me a pic of one. All I said at the end was hope he is doing great. He hasn’t replied. It’s been a good 5 hours and I doubt I would get a reply. What do I do now? I knew this was going to happen.
b

February 20, 2017 at 4:04 pm

Hi, just wanted to leave some words of encouragement for you girls out there. If your ex was a douche, get outta here, you shouldn’t the trying to get a douche back into your life. If he wasn’t, listen- my Boyfriend broke up with me oct 2016 because I was insecure, controlling, possessive, etc. I begged and begged, was a mess and spiralled out of control but thank god I found chris’ site which honestly helped me get along. I read every article here and followed everything to try to make myself better. It was very hard but I kept on trying and Chris’ words kept me going. In dec 2016, I didn’t even expect it at all but we reconnected and he asked me for another another. thank you once again Chris and to all you girls, never give up. Get better, for yourself

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 21, 2017 at 8:16 pm

Thank you for sharing B!

Angelique

February 19, 2017 at 6:15 pm

Hi. Me and my ex have been split for almost 2 years. He was my first boyfriend when I was 16. We lasted for about 8 almost 9 months and were getting really serious in our relationship. We were both Virgins when we were together And when we split up. Then during the summer he met my best friend…well now my ex best friend…and he started to act distant. then my best friend was telling me to break up with him and me and him had our own issues in our relationship we were trying to work out but she always tried getting in the middle…long story short I listened to her and we broke up and he tried winning me back for 3 months but my best friend always tried being a third wheeler and pulling me away from him. And I was with someone else which didn’t last. Then he blocked me on everything and I went to his school to talk to him but he wouldn’t look me in the eye as he rejected me. Then I started to move on and got a new number and started making new friends in college. and going to the gym. Then within 4 months of not contacting him he unblocked me on Facebook. And my friend was telling me my ex wanted my number before he left to basic training for the army. so I gave him my number to give to my ex and he was telling me how he wants another shot. But friends with benefits and I agreed. But then found out he had a girlfriend in training which I didn’t know of. But she broke up with him because she found out and now hes single. And now hes telling me he misses me and I was the best experience hes ever had and talked about having a baby. he even said he loved me. We would start to talk about our family and stuff. But then he wouldn’t text sometimes since hes in training and when he does he’ll go back to being sexual. Help me please. I Dont know what to do. Im so confused.

Angelique

February 25, 2017 at 8:11 pm

That’s true. I think I will tell him when he comes home and we are face to face instead of through.l text. That way he can see im serious about this. And that way we won’t misinterpret our words.
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 25, 2017 at 11:06 pm

owkie dokie!
Angelique

February 23, 2017 at 1:34 am

Ok. That sounds like a good idea. But should I say it through text or face to face? I know I will get nervous on both. Mainly through text because I won’t know what he is thinking or doing.
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 23, 2017 at 8:10 pm

The good side with text is you can edit out everything before sending. The good side with personal is you can convey the right tone of voice and non verbal actions.
Angelique

February 21, 2017 at 12:46 am

I want to but Idk how to say it… Plus he texted me last night saying hes gonna be home soon from training.
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 21, 2017 at 11:00 pm

write it down first.. write down everything you want to say without editing.. and then once your done, read it and then that’s when you edit..
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 20, 2017 at 7:44 pm

HI Angelique,

why not tell him what you really want?

Dada

February 19, 2017 at 4:39 am

We broke up last month. We been 1 year for now.
I broke up with him because he was not giving his all in me and denying constantly my needs.
but then i realized that it was a rush decision so after 2 weeks i came back to him to talk and ask him to get back together
and fix things. He said it was too late and there are so many things why our relationship wouldn’t worked and issues. And also last thurs i almost begged him to come back literally to try again but his defenses was so high. But i called that night to apologize and said i’m cool with the breakup (even though i’m not). Later on, we talked about our relationship (the good and bad times) and he said he was jealous because someone has brought me flowers and chocolate the other day but he insisted i should try to entertain that guy.

As a couple, we regularly fight over silly things but got back together and with passion. but this time it’s really serious we haven’t have this long no talk together This guy also had a 7 year long term relationship before we met, I’m just scared he will got back together with the his ex. But his ex has relationship but it long distance.

What should I do ? I want a new relationship with him . I want to make right this time.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 20, 2017 at 7:08 pm

Hi Dada,

why would you think he would go back with his ex? And also, it’s not good that you begged for him back.. although you did take back what you said, but ofcourse, it would still be at the back of his head. There’s no conviction..I think you need to restart the no contact period.. and then stick to 30 days, be active in improving yourself and then slowly rebuild rapport after.

Cassie

February 18, 2017 at 8:02 pm

Hey. I met this guy in college, and we clicked from the very beginning. Within a month he told me he loved me and wanted to see where things went with us. We were sexual with each other 3 times during the first month we knew each other and about a month later I found out I was pregnant with his child. I told him and we got into several arguments because we couldn’t agree on what should be fine about the pregnancy. I told him that I didn’t think we should try to be together anymore and three days later he started taking about him going on a date with a new girl. About a week later he told me they made things official and I cut off contact. I told him that I didn’t think we should talk unless it concerned school or the baby. He contacted me last night saying that he still loves me and that I really hurt him by breaking up with him and I told him I only broke up with him because I thought he didn’t love me anymore and he said he would love to give me a second chance but he doesn’t feel like it’s right for him to just leave this girl as he has known her for years and doesn’t want to hurt her. It kills me to know that I messed everything up by being insecure and that we’d still be together right now if I hadn’t left him. I see him every single day and he makes it a point to bring her up around me and has actually told me that he likes making me jealous because it shows that I still love him. I don’t know how to do no contact because I have to work with him at school everyday because we are partners on our hands on projects and because I’m pregnant. What do I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 20, 2017 at 6:40 pm

Hi Cassie,

he’s more concerned about hurting another girl than hurting a pregnant one? If you’re going to to do the no contact rule, that means you’re only going to talk to him about the baby.. check the two links below:
Here’s How To Get Your “Baby Daddy” Back

EBR 032: What To Do If You Work With Your Ex Boyfriend

jenny

February 14, 2017 at 5:20 pm

I was in a relationship when I was 15 and I had done a lot of damage to the relationship. I was horrible now that I think of it sine than it’s been 5 years that I been trying to get his back. Because he never felt like I respected him and took his for granted he broke up and left. Ever since that I been trying to get him back. I do love him I really do. I have been in another relationship after 4 years of waiting for my lover but that relationship didn’t worked out instead that ex knew that I love my lover who was my 1st love and actually try to help me out. My lover who I want back knows that I was in relationship. I always contact him every year and talk but we always end up having arguments. He seems to be off because of that he was saying that relationship was short time and all we had was arguments. He was also saying I am fake and I pretended. I been living with his memories. He did said he has a gf that I am not sure. We recently texted and again I blow it up so badly he was texting nicely he said move on. We both didn’t understand. I see that he might have moved on but I kept talking about the past and make myself look more horrible in his mind. But then sometimes he used to be looking at my old posts on Instagram and asking me who my boyfriend is where he is from. That makes me feel like somewhere he still has little feelings. All I want is some suggestions of how I should turn this around. What can I do to make him realize that I’m not that same me that I was 5 years ago. Right now he was really upset so he blocked me and I was really too much on him too, I talked too much past from morning to night continually texting I was too emotional. What should I do to change that now? I want him to have good memories of me. What should I do? I have try to move on but it didn’t work and I want him only since the past 5 years. I been looking for help but haven’t found it accept people just telling me to move on but that hurts me even more, my heart doesn’t accept it.I want someone to tell me step by step what i should do to turn his bad memories around. 🙁

jenny

February 15, 2017 at 5:15 am

I have changed, I am nothing like I used to be but because of my emotional day, I ended up blowing it again, he is so mad that he blocked me. How do I show him how I am. As you might understand the frustration of loving someone and they don’t trust you because of you were years ago, I guess I got a little carried away. This time I don’t want to make any mistakes. I want him back and I am willing to change myself in a good way. Bit he has blocked me how can I show him how I am after 5 years. I want him to see that but i just don’t know how to ??
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 15, 2017 at 7:16 pm

let’s say, that was a bad impression, because that mistake confirmed his thoughts that you didn’t change even you did, it can change, but it might take longer than usual because you have to be consistent..There has to be another encounter like that, that you can prove that you’re not going to react the same way, and just remain calm. So, since you’re blocked, just treat it like a no contact period. Set a limit until when you would wait to be unblocked, maybe at least 45 days, if you are unblocked during it, don’t message right away because you would look like you’re just waiting for it.
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 14, 2017 at 9:37 pm

Hi Jenny,

I think you know the answer, you’re just not doing it. It’s very simple but hard to do. Just change. Improve yourself, grow, widen your world, do new things and make new friends. He wont view you differently if you’re not different

rene

February 13, 2017 at 4:47 am

Me and my boyfriend date 2 months he blocked me and unblocked me and we get in so fight he says to me he is done with me and.he is never going to speak to me again. he is not coming back and block me again.how can i get him back.

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 14, 2017 at 1:12 pm

Hi Rene,

there’s no guarantee that you can get him back but your option is to do no contact.. open this link:
Your Ex Boyfriend Blocked You… What Now? (Video)

Gemma

February 12, 2017 at 7:10 pm

Me and my ex boyfriend were in a 4 year relationship we split up last year and he started sleeping around with other women I took him back however he broke up with me again a few months ago and done the same thing he done before. The whole time he hasn’t wanted me back however I did sleep with someone else when we weren’t together to and he found out, because he is my first he went mental told me he has been with several other women and wants nothing more to do with me. I did 2 weeks no contact until today when I gave him and called him and unfortunately didn’t get the answer I wanted. He told me he doesn’t love me anymore, he feels nothing for me that he’s moving on and after my begging he doesn’t want me to contact him again. He really seems over me and I hate that I can’t turn the tables around and make him realise what he’s lost. Instead he thinks the opposite and even when I do no contact he doesn’t bother to contact me. All I want is for him to come back and realise what he’s put me through and be the man I need but after today I don’t see him ever coming back

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 13, 2017 at 11:21 pm

Hi Gemma,

2 weeks is too short to really say a person has changed.. I think this time, since you begged, restart the count and do 45.. And accept that he has moved on.. So, that after nc,.consider it a restart..So, that you’re coming from a point of building up rapport and attraction slowly and not in the point of trying to figure out or pull emotions out of him…

Lady

February 12, 2017 at 4:24 pm

Hi! I broke up with my boyfriend of ~1.5 years about 2 weeks ago. I broke up with him because I felt like he was so hyper focused on his career and that he couldn’t think about us and our future, even though we had talked about marriage and children.. I called him a week later and basically broke down, begging for him back, and obviously that didn’t go well. I’ve started the no contact rule, and am focusing on bettering myself, but I’m worried this wont work. Is there anything else I should be doing?

EBR Team Member: Amor

February 13, 2017 at 9:58 pm

Hi Lady,

there’s no guarantee that it will work, but if he’s focused in his career, then you need to avoid looking like another responsibility in his life.. So, that’s why it’s important that yoy build your own routine during nc and maintain it even after…

Bella

February 11, 2017 at 11:05 am

Hello! My story is complicated. My past relationship lasted for a year and we really loved each other. His ex and him were together for six years but he told me this was the first time he loved somebody there wasn’t family and the other relationship was only teenlove. During the fall and winter I was not the person he fell in love with. He lived in my apartment with me and I had to do all the chores. He is pretty spoiled and whenever I asked if he could help me he got upset and defensive. He broke up with me because of me being unstable. He had his freetime and I worked fulltime and had to take care of everything and stayed home because of a depression I got from all the pressure. We broke up in december last year, met up a couple of days later and got back together but I didn’t feel in my gut that he understood his responsibility why we broke up and when I said it, we broke up again. Now we’ve met and I gave him all the stuff there was left in my apartment and he was really kind but wouldn’t stop to talk to me. Now I’m trying the no contact, but will it work if you have been in contact since the breakup? He panicked last week when he was going to pick his stuff up but couldn’t because he didn’t feel well and “really want to sort things out” I avoided his last text after we saw each other to get control. Sorry for my English, English is not my first language. Is this hopeless or should I get this a try?

Bella

February 13, 2017 at 6:42 pm

He thinks I’m the unstable one, yes. And therefore he broke up with me. I know he sounds kind of a douche, but I miss him really bad. New years eve was really a new start for me and he said “2017 is our year” and that’s the last happy memory we have together and I can’t get it out of my head. Thanks
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 14, 2017 at 4:58 pm

well, that’s normal to come from him because he sounds abusive.. For me you should move on, but if you dont want to, then be very active during and after nc
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 12, 2017 at 8:59 pm

Hi Bella,

correct me if I’m wrong. He’s spoiled, you made all the effort for the relationship to work, you are responsible in your life but he’s not, and yet you think you’re the unstable one?

Jasmie

February 11, 2017 at 9:30 am

We dated for 3 months. We were happy. He suddenly said we were different in some aspects and initiated the break up. He asked me not to find him for a month. What does that mean? He needs time to reconsider? Should I text him after 30 days?

jasmie

April 9, 2017 at 11:22 am

Should I delete his contact (he would not be able to see my profile pic nor last online on whatsapp) like he is blocked by me or just keep ignoring him?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 10, 2017 at 7:32 pm

nope.. just keep ignoring him..
jasmie

April 4, 2017 at 4:48 pm

he now blocks all the assess to contact him when i asked for the true reason again few days before. why didnt he do it earlier? is there a chance for him to unblock me?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 5, 2017 at 3:04 pm

there can be a chance if he sees you dont care anymore.. I think you need to restart nc
Jasmie

April 1, 2017 at 11:08 am

i still miss him so bad. i tried to be friendly and talk as he said could be friends before but he now said its painful to talk to me. whats the logic?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 2, 2017 at 5:30 pm

can be guilt but can be also that he still has feelings
jasmie

February 23, 2017 at 10:12 am

i broke the no contact on 22nd day as i got accident and admitted to hospital. he didn’t reply. i don’t mind if you straightly tell me the chance of getting back is very low. Or you have any comment on his behaviour. thanks a lot.
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 23, 2017 at 9:08 pm

He knows that you’re hospitalized and he still didn’t care? For me you should move on..
Jasmie

February 19, 2017 at 1:59 pm

We are both 25. Not long distance relationship. He was busy with interview for new job at that time. Even in the last date, there was no sign. Was he just too stressed (to tackle both relationship and interview)? I felt his love and really don’t understand. Should I wait or text him first?
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 20, 2017 at 10:10 pm

hmm.. that’s too light to initiate a break up…if you are active in improving yourself and in posting in social media during nc, yes you should initiate after nc..but if you weren’t, do that first before initiating contact
EBR Team Member: Amor

February 12, 2017 at 8:49 pm

Hi Jasmie,

how old are you both, are you in a long distance relationship, was there signs he showed that you can remember?

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