The Definitive Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back

8,583 thoughts on “The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

C

May 13, 2017 at 10:32 am

My ex boyfriend and I dated for ten months but he was going through some problems at home so even after we broke up he was staying at my place for a few days. The last night he spent at mine we had a really good time together, it was clear that the two of us were still into each other. That night he told me he loved me and that we’d fix things soon, he told me the same the next morning just before he left. Two days after that he told me he didn’t want a relationship but then I found out from a friend that he had gotten into a new relationship that same day. My best friend’s boyfriend is friends with my ex so my best friend sees him regularly, and she told me when they went out the other night he got upset whilst thinking about me even though his current girlfriend was there. Today it’s been a month since they started dating and I’m seeing him in four days, is it worth a shot or do I probably have no chance?

EBR Team Member: Amor

May 13, 2017 at 4:08 pm

Hi C,

He’s in a grass is greener case.. Check this one:
The Grass is Greener Syndrome For Ex Boyfriends

Michelle

May 6, 2017 at 10:40 pm

I ran into my ex boyfriend a a bar. I know he saw me but he stuck around and pretended not to. I approached and said hi. He said he’s not going to kiss me even though I didn’t try to kiss him? Then we hugged a long hug and he kissed my cheek. The next day he sent me this text:
Sorry I was so awkward, but that’s how I felt. It’s that mix of caring deeply for you, yet, not wanting to send you funny signals.
Feels like he’s saying I’m not going to let you think there’s a chance to get back together?? Feels bad. What should I do? I never responded. I had asked him to meet up next weekend so I could give him some stuff he left at my house. 3 1/2 yrs living together. He’s 56 & I’m 49.

EBR Team Member: Amor

May 7, 2017 at 3:15 pm

be casual..just tell him no worries, don’t be stranger next time. I hope you have a nice day

Natalie

May 5, 2017 at 8:46 am

Hi

I am dating this guy for the last 6 months and recently I have started feeling that he is taking me for granted. If I ask him to meet me he is always busy or tired but he is out and about with his friends on one phone call from them. We are still together and we talk about getting married soon but I dont want to be in a relationship where I am already being taken for granted.

I have brought it up 3-4 times in the last 2 weeks, but there is not any change. When I ask him why he doesnt make plans with me, he says that work is busy these days and he is not good at planning dates! But still talks to me about spending future together. If I fight on this, he says that I have to accept him the way he is. But the issue is, he doesnt have time for me but he has all the time to hang out with his friends.

I am fearing maybe a break up happens soon. I want him to stop taking me for granted. Please suggest what to do.

Thanks

EBR Team Member: Amor

May 5, 2017 at 5:11 pm

check this one:

EBR 003: Does Having Your Own Life Help You Get Your Ex Back?

Mariska

May 5, 2017 at 7:59 am

Hi there im mariska and my boyfriend broke up this me on the 7th of April we have been together for a year. We were on a break for 2 weeks and just after the break he told me he loves me and we can make it work then i started fighting with him about something small the rest of the day was nice then 1 day after he broke up with me he cried by my aunt and said he cant take the fights anymore he really loves me but he cant take it and he told me that he does not feel the same way anymore but he will always love me and he just wants me that makes me confused. He told me i was the perfect girl just not for him. I kept him away from his friends and tried to keep him in a box because i always wanted to be with him everyday and he said he also needs his own space. He friend zoned me and told me he is done with the relationship but later when things change we can talk. i also told him once that hes all im gonna have for the rest of my life and i had no chance to experience what is out there this i really regret because i just want him and he told me after the break up i must go out with my friends and experience what is out there we can give it 2 months and if i still feel he is the one for me then we can talk. He wanted to marry me and we talked about if all the time maybe i did to much then he said he does not know if he wants to. i dont know what is going on in his head im in nc for almost 21 days and he has not reacted out to me yet i dont know what to do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

May 5, 2017 at 5:00 pm

If you were not active in improving yourself, and in posting, restart the count and do at least 30 days..

Ella

May 4, 2017 at 4:12 pm

Hi
I was in a relationship for almost two years with my boyfriend. We broke up about 3 months ago. At first I broke up with him over a stupid reason and then realized I made a mistake. He then wanted to take a break for a week just to see what he wanted. We got back together a week later. After about a week of being back together he broke up with me again. When we first broke up I was extremely upset and was extremely nice to him. The second break up though I was not so kind and said very rude things to him (for example “I hate you’). We both agreed to not talk to other people for a while just to not make each other upset. I helped him when he was sad or needed to talk at the beginning of the breakup. I then found out he was talking to this girl, they have been close to dating for these 3 months. I am extremely upset about it but have tried to be kind about it. I did do the no contact, but that was because he said something very rude to me. When I did start to talk to him again he told me he thought I kicked him out of my life and he got his mind to be okay with that. He would occasionally call me here and there after this but that slowly stopped. I told him I wasn’t over him still and maybe we could work out again. We tried to be friends but he then said “he felt uncomfortable talking to me”. He would not answer anything I said to him. I told him I was sorry and would leave him alone. We did not talk for 3 weeks. A couple days ago he reached out to me saying “hey I’m sorry for being an a** can we talk”. I said it was okay and the next day he came over. We had some laughs but ended up having sex. I then found out him and the girl he was talking to having been on good terms (she does not want to date him) but are still talking. He then tried to make more plans with me but it was for sexual reasons. I now think I am a booty call. I am not sure what to do, because when we were dating we were always happy unless there was a fight obviously. Most of the time happy together though. I am not sure how to step in or fix anything that has happened. Should I start the no contact rule again or will this create a new problem for me? Should I be hanging out with him more for him to remember the good times with me? Should I try to get over him? What would you recommend to do?

Ella

May 6, 2017 at 7:23 pm

Thank you,
They have not been dating but have been close to dating. (sorry there was a spelling error, they have not been on good terms) I recently talked to him and they are no longer talking. Would this give me a better chance to try? He has been asking to hang out a lot and Im not too sure if this means he wants to hang out or just have sex. should I talk to him about just wanting to hang out and not have just have sex?
EBR Team Member: Amor

May 7, 2017 at 3:10 pm

that’s good that they’re not together but if they’re still together, it’s still not that good.. if you are going to meet, make it short and public..so, that it doesn’t lead to sleeping with each other
EBR Team Member: Amor

May 5, 2017 at 4:05 pm

they’re dating for 3 months? that means you’re his friend with benefits..it looks slim because it sounded like you rushed it after the first no contact.. I think you need to restart and follow the advice on this one:
Sleeping with Your Ex Boyfriend… Does It Work?

Sarv

May 1, 2017 at 1:24 pm

Hi
I was in a fwb with a friend. But it was a kind of a private relationship! Emitons involved from both sides. We ve been together around 10 months and 2 days ago I called it off. As we discussed before with him, the only obstacle for us to be in an official relationship from his point of view was that he used to be friends with my ex. Me and my ex broke up more than a year ago, he moved out of the country and they barely contact each other (my ex and my fwb). So he tells me that since he knows me because of him, he feels weird to be in an official relationship with me, since others will start to judge and stuff. One interesting point here is that when my ex broke up with me he was cheating with a friend of mine on me! And those others that my fwb is concerned about forgot the whole drama in a couple of months and still hung out with that couple untill they left the country!!
I couldn’t say any thing to my fwb for the sake of my self esteem and character. I just told him that i preffer to have a boyfriend and be official rathr than being in a part time relationship! He agreed on staying friends but no relationship. He made me sure he just had that kne reason for not becoming my official bf. So I said fine..
from all the evidence I knowhe has strong feelings for me but he kept resisting to act upon them.. I decided to get into a no contact phase since I believe his reason seems nonesense to some extent and it may make him think twice..
He has the keys to my hous.. he lives very close.. he has some stuff over here… we used to cook, wach movies and hang out a lot, talking about our private lives and our family stuff.. great friendship to say… so what do you think??
Ps. He is kinda conservative though.. and we have a lot of mutual friends and I hope I can proceed this no contact

EBR Team Member: Amor

May 2, 2017 at 5:36 pm

it’s hard to get out of fwb because when you did it for a long time, he’s already labeled you in his mind as fwb only. Time and constant refusing to be fwb again is your only choice.. you can do nc ifyou want and then slowly build rapport..set a limit until when you would do it..just dont sleep with him..

Donna

April 30, 2017 at 2:41 am

Hi Amor,

I have been doing the “Moving On Without Moving On” as Chris has recommended to me (we talked in private messages back in January). So far, everything has been working slowly. I’ve been having a difficult time loosing weight, but as I said it’s slowly working.
I have not had the time or money to get the professional photographs taken yet, but I do have plans to get that done eventually.

On a good note, I have been posting pictures on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, and just last month I noticed something interesting on Instagram. One of my exes best friends liked and commented a few of my pictures on Instagram and he doesn’t even follow me (though I follow him and my ex). So since his friend doesn’t follow me and commented (which is surprising to me), should I consider this a good sign? Even though my ex has clearly been moving on (he immediately found a rebound girl and has been with her for almost a year) and he has been posting pictures of being on exotic vacations every month (I’m not sure where he gets all the money as he hasn’t worked since he started dating this girl). I really don’t understand what he thinks he is proving by flaunting his new relationship this way and throwing away his money and career this way.

I haven’t tried to get in touch with him this year since he seems to always be on vacations. Is it possible that there is a deeper problem that he is trying to ignor? He used to be so much happier when we were friends. Then when his ex fiancée came along she manipulated him to the point that he pushed away all of his friends (including me). Now that he is away from that ex fiancée and has this new girl (who honestly isn’t any better and much younger) he still isn’t the same kind man I knew before. He is in his 40s (with kids from a previous marriage) and I’m in my 30s, so it’s not like we are both young. Please give me somebody insight. I’ve tried to get in touch with Chris, but he hasn’t responded to my private message in a couple months.

Donna

April 30, 2017 at 10:30 pm

Amor, that is interesting since Chris has incuraged me to move on without moving on. I know he will never be the same man that I fell in love with, and I don’t expect him to. Usually people change for the better, not become worse and unhealthy.

I would really like Chris’s thoughts on this since the only time I’ve seen something like this happen is due to a midlife crisis.
EBR Team Member: Amor

May 1, 2017 at 11:41 am

ok donna, I’ll forward this to Chris
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 30, 2017 at 2:01 pm

I think you should move on.. It looks like he has changed but you’re still hoping for the old him.

Bea

April 24, 2017 at 8:41 pm

Hi,

I already commented under another article but I’m writing here again as I haven’t got any response yet. Me and my ex broke up at the end of Feb and then I did 30 days of NC, worked on myself etc.. Successfully restarted contact and we talk time to time now. We talk quite a lot when we do but not frequently. He follows me on fb and instagram and even puts likes but I don’t have the feeling he misses me right now as we talk like once a week. I texted him last time so now he should be the one to initiate contact, I’m just worried he won’t soon. I don’t know which tactic I should take now. Jealousy? Thanks for your help.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 26, 2017 at 3:55 pm

its ok to initiate, as long as you’re the one ending the conversation at high point.. you have to initiate more because once a week texting doesn’t build rapport that much..

Laura

April 24, 2017 at 4:00 pm

i was friends with him for a few years before i fell in love with him, then we went on 2 dates and he said that he didn’t want to go on anymore dates with me. Six months later we became boyfriend and girlfriend. my boyfriend and i dated for over a year and over a month ago he broke up with me, He called me to explain his issues with the relationship and i didn’t know that at the time and i got so scared that i din’t know what to say. he said he was acting like a tv bf for me and i don’t want that i love him for him and i would do anything to make him happy. My friends told me recently that he thought i was obsessed with him but i know that i am really not. a week after the breakup i called him to apologize for all the mistakes i made and he said “what do you want” and i said “i want you to forgive me and i hope we can still be friends” and he said that he forgives me and that we can. After that i did the no contact rule which ended 3 days ago. I sent him a video over facebook the day it ended and said “hey, i saw this and i thought you’d find this hilarious” and he saw a day later it but did reply. When should i try again? what should i do to prove i’m not obsessed? what should i do to win him back?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 29, 2017 at 8:22 pm

You need to wait a week. If he still doesn’t reply, wait two weeks before trying for the last time.
Laura

April 24, 2017 at 4:01 pm

oh and a day after the phone call one of my friends told me that he said he’d never get back together with me

Lily

April 23, 2017 at 7:15 am

Hi,

I started no contact around January 2017 and tried to initiate contact after the 30 days no contact but he blocked me after we had a huge fight as initially we tried to stay friends but at that time I still had feelings for him. Fast forward to April 2017, he unblocked me and asked how i was and stuff. I didnt reply and he sent another message telling that he will be moving away soon. My question is should i ask why he is back in contact? At this point, I dont want him back but i also wish to have a proper closure or goodbye with him. What should i do? Thanks

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 28, 2017 at 6:21 pm

If it’s just for closure, go for it

Anna

April 23, 2017 at 1:27 am

Hi,

I started no contact in january this year then tried to reach out after 30 days but it didnt work. So i just let go and after 3 months of no contact, he sent me a message asking how am i doing. I dont know what to do as I am scared and confused because prior to starting with no contact, we really had a big fight.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 28, 2017 at 6:21 pm

If it’s just for closure, go for it

AZ

April 21, 2017 at 2:57 am

Hi there,

I wrote in before but i am not sure where the thread is now. Anyway, i think i have good news. My ex requested for space and a for a month, he kept telling me he is not sure if we can make it, i hang around for a month and decided to go into NC. Back then, i was hoping he would come back to me. Anyway on 2nd day of NC, my mom was hospitalized due to an illness, as such i told myself “Screw this relationship and focus on myself and my family”. I was so busy and before i knew it, i was on 25th day of NC. He did not reach out to me at all during this period and neither did i.

Anyway around 25th day of NC, i decided to send him a courtesy text to let him know what’s been going on. At this point, i was not expecting anything at all. But since we went out for close to a year, i thought i ought to let him know. Well, magically he just found himself back into my life, we began communicating normally, he came down to visit my mom and its like things just went back to normal naturally. Its been 3 weeks since i sent him that text.

I asked him a few days ago if we are back on and he replied “Yup, of course we are”.

My question is- is there a need to have a serious talk before we begin again? or should i just adopt lets go with the flow attitude? actually at this point, i really am not sure if i want him again as a bf.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2017 at 9:19 pm

build rapport first..relationship talks are better than in person when you’ve already built up rapport and attraction

AZ

April 19, 2017 at 8:06 am

Hello there,

I wrote in before but i am not sure where it is now. Anyway, i think i have good news. I implemented NC for approximately 25 days but mine was coincidental NC as after the 2nd day of NC, my mom was hospitalized. As such i told myself “Screw this relationship and focus on my mom (family) and myself” instead. He did not reach out to me AT ALL during this period, neither did i.

Once things have settled down at home, i decided to send him a courtesy text to let him know what’s been going on and he just found his way back into my life since (it has been 3 weeks since i sent him that text), we’ve been communicating normally and he came down to visit my mom. By then, i really did not have any sort of expectations for him to come back, it was really just a courtesy message since we did go out for a year.

I sent him a message this morning to ask “are we back on?” and he replied “yup of course”

So i guess.. NC does work. but my question is.. is there any need to discuss the relationship or should i adopt “lets go with the flow” attitude? During NC i adopted the mindset that the relationship is over and did not expect him to come back.. so i am rather confused as what to do now?

and thank you very much

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2017 at 9:20 pm

build rapport first..relationship talks are better than in person when you’ve already built up rapport and attraction

Ashley

April 18, 2017 at 2:38 am

So I’m kind of in a sticky situation. My ex broke up with me on Christmas over text. He had flaked on me a few times and, when I voiced how that bothered me, he just broke it off with me. We went back and forth a bit (me asking for a conversation and standing up for myself as he wasn’t giving me a real reason why he wanted to break up) and he stopped replying. The next day, I saw that he had blocked me on social media.

Three months have gone by and I’ve noticed that he’s deleted his social media accounts and such. I’ve been working on myself (got a new job, started working out, have been taking care of my health…heck, I’ve even been out on dates) but I still miss him. I’m just afraid of how he’ll respond.

This isn’t the first time he’s broke up with me out of the blue but for some reason he always comes back. I’m just lost and unsure of what to do. He’s never been much of a communicator and I’m afraid that I’ll upset him if I reach out.

Any advice?
Thank you!

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2017 at 12:32 pm

when did you last attempted to contact him? how long was your relationship?

Ashley

April 18, 2017 at 2:37 am

So I’m kind of in a sticky situation. My ex broke up with me on Christmas over text. He had flaked on me a few times and, when I voiced how that bothered me, he just broke it off with me. We went back and forth a bit (me asking for a conversation and standing up for myself as he wasn’t giving me a real reason why he wanted to break up) and he stopped replying. The next day, I saw that he had blocked me on social media.

Three months have gone by and I’ve noticed that he’s deleted his social media accounts and such. I’ve been working on myself (got a new job, started working out, have been taking care of my health…heck, I’ve even been out on dates) but I still miss him. I’m just afraid of how he’ll respond.

This isn’t the first time he’s broke up with me out of the blue but for some reason he always comes back. I’m just lost and unsure of what to do. He’s never been much of a communicator and I’m afraid that I’ll upset him if I reach out.

Any advice?
Thank you!

Ashley

April 25, 2017 at 11:45 pm

I last spoke to him on Christmas and we were together for about 7 months.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 29, 2017 at 9:55 pm

well, you have to initiate now.. if he doesn’t respond,then at least you can move on.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2017 at 12:28 pm

when did you last attempted to contact him? how long was your relationship?

Deeshi

April 14, 2017 at 7:58 am

hey,
i just need a little help from you,
basically my boyfriend and i are together. i am sure you must be thinking then what has got me here!! before letting you know the problem i want to tell you the kind of relation we shared.
he is 24 and i am 21. he wants to focus on his career for 3 years. we know each other from 1 year and dating from past 7 months. he doesn’t have many girl friends. he is most of the times with his guy friends and more than that with his parents. he is quite sure to have a future with me. and wants me to talk to my parents about our relationship. he always used to say he is lucky to have me in his life and loves me forever. these were his words ” giving you time will be my priority and talking to you everyday will be my job” he said this because we were going to go through a long distance relationship. but he hasn’t left from here still. he was going to go abroad to earn. but his plan got postponed.
NOW THE PROBLEM IS THAT:-
past 15 days he hasnt called me. he initiates a contact only through wats app messages but there also he disappears after one or 2 texts. so i decided to go off wats app and see whether he calls me or no.
its been 7 days that i have been off all social networking sites. and in these 7 days he hasn’t called me up. and we haven’t met past 2 months. but in these month she used to say by himself we will meet soon many times he said that but we never met. i told him once i never ask to meet you. he said i know but i even know how you feel. i know he wants to focus on his career and he wants me to do the same but that doesn’t mean we dont communicate right?
so i want to know from you should i call him up? or i should wait for him to call?
basically i dont want to act desperate too. i have already tried explaining everything once i feel i shouldn’t do it again
i am really confused.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 16, 2017 at 8:06 am

you should talk to him about that.. it’s been two months. Ask what you want to ask in a calm way.

Ninna

April 14, 2017 at 3:21 am

Hey I am still in a relationship with my boyfriend. We havnt broken up.We never had an argument regarding anything. I still don’t know why it’s been 7 days and he hasn’t called me up. I have been off wat’s app past 7 days and he hasnt bothered to ask me where am i? Why am I not reading his messages? Basically I went off wat’s app because past few days he wasn’t even talking to me properly like he was the only one who used to initiate the contact by texting me and when I used to reply back he would disappear again. We havnt met past 2 months. He hasnt called me past 15 days but has texted me almost every alternate days and past 7 days as I am off wat’s app he hasn’t called me!
He was saying he was busy but all I all I thought was can’t he even get 5 mins to call me from his busy schedule?
And yes 2 weeks before he asked me to tell my parents about us he wanted to meet my sister and talk about our future to them. He is sure of getting married to me. And he hardly had any girl friends he is only around his guy friends and most of the time with his family. It’s been 1 year that we know each other and past 7 months he is sure of spending his life with me. And he told his parents also about me. I have a nice and friendly relation with his brother with which he has no issues. He says he is lucky to have me and loves me a lot. He keeps showing my pictures to his friends to show them he is dating me. Few days back he also told me we will meet soon and he kept saying this many times. He said you never ask me to meet but I know how you feel.
I tried talking to him about all this but he said he doesn’t like proving his love for me.
According to him he wants me and him to focus 3 years on our career. And then get settled together.
But 3years without communication is not right for me. I don’t know how to talk to him and explain him. He has no time for me. And I already tried talking to him once I don’t wana look desperate again
What should I do should I call him?
And how should I try talking to him and make him understand

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 16, 2017 at 8:06 am

you should talk to him about that.. it’s been two months. Ask what you want to ask in a calm way.

Maya

April 13, 2017 at 4:22 pm

Hey! So my boyfriend broke up with me in late January. We are both about 23 years old and we were dating for six months. The first four months were really good and we got along. My ex wanted to take things slow and create a foundation for our relationship to make it last. However, even though he never committed to a serious relationship with me he stated that we were exclusive and he was 100% committed to me. However, around December he changed and started becoming cold to me and would randomly ignore me for no reason. We had a conversation and decided to work it out. Then in late January he broke up with me saying he was not feeling good about the relationship and he was not in the right mindset for it (he is also in his senior year of college and was studying for the LSATS to apply for law school). He said he had too much on his mind and he also revealed to me that about a year ago he dated a girl for a few months who was bipolar and tried to kill herself. He broke up with her after that and she blamed him and said he abandoned her. He said this relationship messed him up and he can’t open up in a new relationship because of it. I felt very betrayed and used because he dated me for so long promising me something more and a serious relationship and then he just decided to end it. So I tried to do no contact but would break it every two weeks or so. At one point I asked if we could be friends in the future and he said “yeah definitely” and said that we could definitely be in each other’s lives again. I gave him more space and in late February I texted him about something I knew he would like. He responded very fast and then started snap chatting me things he would during our relationship. I thought this was a good sign that we could be friends or get back together. However, he was hot and cold with me, sometimes snap chatting me and telling about law school and sometimes he would completely ignore me. I made a comment in mid march about how we should catch up sometime. He completely ignored me for days and I was so frustrated because I don’t understand why he can’t just say he’s not comfortable with that. So I sent him a long message about how he hurt me so much during the relationship and how I was very good to him because I thought he wanted more eventually. I said that he didn’t appreciate me at all and I deserve someone who will treat me like I deserve to be treated and appreciate me. He did not respond to this message but continued watching a few of my snap chat stories for a few weeks. This was almost a month ago and I have had no contact with him since. So my dilemma is that I miss him a lot and a part of me wants him back because the beginning of our relationship was so good and he was so sweet at times. However, he is clearly not ready or mature enough for a relationship because he has no idea how to communicate as an adult, he has unresolved issues from a past relationship and he is overall very pessimistic when it comes to relationships now because of going through many short lived relationships. But, I can’t shake this feeling of wanting him in my life because I love him and he is a really great person. The 30 day no contact is up this weekend but I may extend it and not text him until his birthday in May. I want to use this time to focus on myself even more. I am finishing up my masters degree and will be spending more time with my friends and family. So far, I have been socializing more and posting fairly frequently on social media (we still follow each other on everything). Sorry, for the long confusing post. Basically, I just want some advice on where to go from here. Is it even worth it to try with this guy who ignores me after being hot and cold? Should I contact him after 30 days or do an extended no contact? If I do contact him, how do I not make it not awkward since I texted him telling I deserved better? Thank you!

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 13, 2017 at 8:16 pm

if you’re not in an emotional position to contact him don’t.. but keep in mind, no contact is not for somebody to change, it’s for you to change. We can’t control others..

Michaela

April 11, 2017 at 5:18 pm

i was friends with my ex for a few years before i fell in love with him, then we went on 2 dates and he said that he didn’t want to go on anymore dates with me. Six months later we became boyfriend and girlfriend. my ex boyfriend and i dated for over a year and we rarely fought. about 3 weeks ago ago he broke up with me over a phone call. He called me to explain his issues with the relationship and i didn’t know that at the time and i got so scared that i didn’t know what to say. he said he was acting like a tv bf for me and i don’t want that i love him for him and i would do anything to make him happy. My friends told me recently that he thought i was obsessed with him but i know that i am really not. a week and a half after the breakup i called him to apologize for all the mistakes i made and he said “what do you want” and i said “i want you to forgive me and i hope we can still be friends” and he said that he forgives me and that we can. I haven’t done anything to contact him since then and plan to keep it like that for at least a month or longer. I love him very much and i want him to be happy
Steff

April 9, 2017 at 4:18 pm

Hello,

My bf broke up with me almost 2 months ago and I’ve so far had 0 contact with him for 3 weeks. We had a great relationship until I moved away and long distance made us fall apart. During this time I broke up with him TWICE during very heated arguments. After I broke it off the 2nd time, he took me back but dumped me 2 weeks later because of a fight. We remained friends. We hung out, had a few drinks and slept together once and he messaged me first saying he had a great time twice. Afterwards I confided in him about something and his response ended up being a watered- down version of him, and not what I needed at all. After this, I had a realization I could no longer be his friend or in his life this way. It hurt too much. A few days later I messaged him saying it was a mistake to be friends and that I have no hard feelings but I wished for him to not contact me. I blocked and deleted him on everything including social media and our mutual friends I met through him as I knew myself and that I would be checking their profiles. This was about three weeks ago. I unblocked him a few days ago as I was tired of holding onto anger and it felt petty. I want to reach out on day 30, but after everything, I feel like it’s a lost cause. I know he loves/loved me a lot but after everything we have both done, do you think it could be salvaged? Is there a point in making contact? Especially when I told him to not contact me anymore?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 10, 2017 at 7:50 pm

it’s not a no contact period if you were not focused in improving yourself and being active in posting.. do that first, and then decide after 30 days if you want to initiate building rapport.

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