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101 thoughts on “How To Make Your Ex Miss You During No Contact”

  1. Avatar

    Ashley

    November 29, 2018 at 2:21 pm

    Hello Chris,
    I am on day three of NC and I ended up becoming very upset and losing hope… Firstly, me and my ex all have mutual friends (including my sister whose bf is his best friend) so my friends will know things that my ex says and won’t tell me half of the truth. In a sense it is kinda like being in a divorced family where our friends move back and forth to our places. Anyway, my sister sent me a screenshot of her bf and my ex text convo and he was saying he doesn’t deal with breakups very well, that he’s just gonna try and stay busy and then he questioned and said “Do y’all think I made the right choice?”. This obviously gave me a bunch of hope because he is having doubts already, but then later that day my sister said that my ex wanted to live the single life and just be by himself… It was then I checked his Instagram and he had deleted all our pictures together and it completely broke me because I had so much confidence in our relationship. Do I still have a shot if I continue the NC rule? our relationship lasted over a year and the last time we saw each other in person we were saying”I love you” to each other and hugging and I also slept at his place. He dumped me via text which is very immature, he is 19 and I’m 20 and we are both in college. Thank you for your time

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 30, 2018 at 2:59 am

      Hi Ashley….usually best to stick with your NC program. A big part of NC is you unending focus on your own self healing. Do you have Program?

  2. Avatar

    lea

    November 27, 2018 at 4:34 pm

    Hi Chris,
    I was long distance with my bf ( middle east to europe) for 6 months then i moved in with him and now after another 6 months he called time on us saying he really thought it through but it isnt working. Ive had a hard time making friends in a new place and less luck with a job and became depressed. He gets quite anxious and stressed generally and with the fights and unhappiness which i think is also circumstantial he says to leave him alone that its definitely over and to arrange my things with his dad. Is there still a chance he will come back? His family say once hes made a decision he wont change his mind. Not sure what to do.

  3. Avatar

    A

    November 22, 2018 at 5:40 pm

    Hi ,

    Me and my boyfriend were together for 10 years . We recently broke up and I have been in NC for 9 days. This is our second break up , do we still have a chance ? Am I doing everything that I could do??

    Thank you,
    A

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 24, 2018 at 2:24 am

      Hi A!

      Odds are on your side given the length of your relationship. Are you following my Program for how to do NC according to my site or eBooks?

  4. Avatar

    Rajveer Jeetoo

    November 13, 2018 at 4:40 pm

    I was dating my girl for 3 months. Our relationship was the best. We were very happy, we were weird together, doing crazy things and we love each other unconditionally. I was not over protective nor possessive towards her. Since last week she told me that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship, she wants break up, she wants to stay alone and she said she will not return to me. I haven’t done any mistake yet. Yes we fought over little things but we cleared the matter the same day. She even told me to move on as she doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now. I’ve been begging her to stay those days but she’s too stubborn. Today i started the No Contact rule. I’m scared if i might lose her forever. I miss her.
    Am i getting her back? Is the no contact rule is making her miss me? Is she going to make the first step?

  5. Avatar

    Lorraine

    November 2, 2018 at 6:26 pm

    Hi Chris! I’ve been dating this guy for 3 months now and it was something more casual but I started to have feelings for him. A few weeks ago he planned camping with me and then texted late night saying he missed me. Well, we went camping. He showed me his favorite place. It was all good! But the other day when he was leaving me at home he said out nowhere he did want to date anyone anymore because he didn’t know what the other person was thinking and that for him to be in a serious relationship and fall in love he needed to be more organized with his life so he needed time. I was so shocked I didn’t know what to answer. A few days later I texted him If we were going to see each other again (cause he keep texting me like nothing has happened) and he said he didn’t know but he wanted to keep in touch and the he was doing this because he all the was thinking about was his love life and that he was felling behind in life. I said that I understood and he should take his time and let me know if he wanted to talk or see me again. Last Saturday he asked to go to his friends house with him. We spend the weekend together and he only apologized about telling all of that in the car but he wasn’t sure when to say or if he wanted to say it. We kept talking on Monday but then he ended the conversation and I’ve heard about him since (I didn’t text him either). What should I do? Should I just give up and move on?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      November 2, 2018 at 10:47 pm

      Hi Lorraine!

      It seems you would benefit by rolling into no contact, but its best to understand well how it all works. Visit my site’s home page for access to resources and tools that will help you out!

  6. Avatar

    Sara

    October 30, 2018 at 2:29 am

    Hey Chris I haven’t talked to him in a while the last thing I sent to him was about my clothes I was suppose to pick them up after my career training had ended. So it’s been about a week and half since I have sent him a text and all I said is he can throw out the little bit of clothes I had but yeah I have implemented a NC rule. I’m not sure if he is lying or telling me the truth I feel like now that we’ve broken up I have realized that he and I have been on and off and it’s making me realize that he’s been trying to maybe get out of the relationship all along so I have been distancing myself emotionally from wanting to try again because I just feel like he is always going to disappoint me again. He said he’s done this before and when I had asked him about it he said he wasn’t doing anything but I have huge trust issues so for me I don’t trust him

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 31, 2018 at 12:24 am

      Hi Sara!

      It seems you have reason to distrust him, otherwise you wouldn’t feel this way. It will all come out in the wash. But right now, leverage your NC period to heal and find things and are fulfilling and rewarding to you. This is your time for “you” to grow and seek to be the best “you” and enjoy all the things that bring you fulfillment.

  7. Avatar

    Rebecca

    October 29, 2018 at 2:38 am

    Hi Chris!
    My boyfriend of 4 months left me after gradually giving me less time & then abruptly telling me he didn’t want to deal with anyone for an entire weekend, after which he broke up with me. I didn’t ask why. I just told him I didn’t want to hear from him again. I constantly lose good men after a few months, but this one was really special & I want him back. That was 3 weeks ago & we’ve had no contact since then.

    The men I date are my age(35-45) & very intelligent and socially astute. They all broke up with me & broke my heart. I have no idea why they left me when we seemed so compatible. I feel that they would see right through what I was doing if I tried to contact them for any reason after NC.

    My question is this: is this even working? I don’t break the NC rule at all. I’ve never had one of these men contact me himself after the NC. Is this something that really only works on younger, less experienced men? Because it doesn’t seem to work for me at all.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 29, 2018 at 2:42 am

      Hi Rebecca!

      I think you improve your chances with NC and at the end of the period, I advocate reaching out to the ex in a prescribed method. I discuss in detail in my ebooks, posts, videos. So tap into those resources. There is a lot more to NC than people realize. Its just one of the puzzle pieces.

  8. Avatar

    Sara

    October 27, 2018 at 5:17 am

    My ex and I broke up last month he said that he wanted to be by himself before we officially broke up I left him two days prior because he was having difficul saying “I love you” back to me. In the past my ex has showed me he cared for me but I guess he wasn’t in love with me which is very confusing. We were together for a year so when I said that to him it was already a year after we’ve been together. He said he couldn’t bring himself to tell me that. Then he proceeded to tell me he has been talking to someone else. So I asked him the basic questions and I said if you wanted to be by yourself why would you bring someone else into your mess? He then said it was a lie and he has told this lie before to get women to leave him (very dysfunctional I know) I told him he disgusts me and I hope whatever is true was worth it. Because in my eyes I don’t feel like that’s how you behave he’s a grown man and to act like that is not what I really want in a man. I just want to know two things why wouldn’t he just leave me alone after I had asked if he is ok to be in a relationship? Because he said he was going through a lot with school and his family that I know to be true. The other question is do men really tell lies about cheating to get a girl to break up with them, or was he really telling me the truth?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 28, 2018 at 4:39 am

      Hi Sara!

      Guys will lie. But everybody lies. But certainly, there is a lot of lying that exists around breakups. So if he is cheating….that is a lie to you as he is betraying your trust. If he is lying about cheating….that is not healthy either. Have you considered implementing NC? My website has a lot of resources that can help you with your ex recovery plan. Visit my home page to tap into some of them!

  9. Avatar

    Tina

    October 11, 2018 at 11:20 am

    Hi Chris. Please help. So I contact my FWB after 30 days of nc, only a brief convo – it went well. He had blocked from everything. Anyway called him after 3 weeks – we had an okay convo until at the end he asked why am I calling because if his gf finds out she will question him. I said that’s fine and I’d delete his number. He was like that’s for the best. Anyway he seems to lie a little – I found some stuff out. Anyway I was upset but a day later he unblocked me on WhatsApp, I changed my display pic and now he wants to see me to have some fun and nothing else. He was adamant to see me. Just don’t know what to work out right now because I had a miscarriage two months and it was his baby. I went through a rough time. What does this all mean? I’m so baffled – I thought he had a gf after me. Anyway he might change his mind and say he doesn’t want to see me anymore. Right now I’m just grateful for the fact he’s unblocked me on WhatsApp

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 12, 2018 at 3:10 am

      Hi Tina!

      You might want to take a closer look at my program to help you through this whole process. Go to my home page and make use of the tools and resources I have there. It seems he is still open to reuniting, but its best to have a sensible ex recovery plan

  10. Avatar

    Tefi

    October 2, 2018 at 5:02 pm

    Hi
    I have a question
    My ex was with a girl for almost two years. He never really stop looking for me, he showed up at my house etc and talked about us. The possibility and the feelings. Now he is single two months and we’ve been seeing each other but he stills thinks of the ex and now says he wants to be a single guy, go out with friends and FLIRTS eith other girls. I was shocked but continue to see him. But yesterday decided to tell him that there are boundaries and i will not be there while he does that no respect. He started calling because he said “he wanted to response to that that he has that right” but later he was busy and didnt told me anything. I started NC. Im afraid he continues eith other girls. What should i do?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 3, 2018 at 1:20 am

      Hi Tefi!

      I agree. He needs to understand you have little to no tolerance for his insensitive flirting behavior. NC may help your ex realize many things.

  11. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 20, 2018 at 7:54 am

    I understand what you’re saying Chris but I’ve already completed no contact. How does it work for someone who has been blocked but I made a positive connection the other day? I find this site really confusing. Last year it was so simple and this year I feel as though I can’t find anything on your site anymore.

  12. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 20, 2018 at 12:47 am

    Hi Chris thanks for the reply. Truly appreciate it. So how long do I wait to see if he initiates? And what do I do if he doesn’t initiate? How long do I wait til I initiate? This is so hard as he still has me blocked everywhere. Surprised that he even spoke to me in a decent way by calling with no caller ID. I’m losing hope

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 20, 2018 at 12:50 am

      Hi again Danielle!

      Most NC periods run from 14 to 45 days. Check out my eBook, “The No Contact Rule Book” as it dives deep into this subject. The sweet spot for a lot of people is around 21 days…but varies depending on many factors and whether you modify the ex recovery plan depends on many factors.

  13. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 18, 2018 at 6:39 pm

    Hi Chris. So I completed 30 days of no contact. I contacted ‘my friends with benefits guy’ after 32 days. I called him with no caller ID as he has still got me blocked. It was a one min convo, it was an okay convo, he asked who it was, I told him and then asked him how he is and called to see how he was doing. He asked me how I was. Then he was like are you going to drop a bombshell, because remember when I said i was pregnant. I was like no I promise you. Then he was like I’m making sure. I did say that I’m sorry for hurting him, he basically repeated everything I said. Asked about him family too. Anyway eventually I said I’m gonna let him get on, and I said to take care, he said it back and that was that. Now what do I do because remember he has me blocked from everything? Maybe he was just nice for the sake of it because I called him out of the blue. I don’t know. Where do I go from here, can I even build rapport from this?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 19, 2018 at 12:10 am

      Hi Danielle!

      So you made a connection and it was generally positive. Pull back awhile and see if he initiates anything.

  14. Avatar

    Sally

    September 11, 2018 at 5:54 pm

    The thing is he’s in a different country and will be joining me on Nov. November is not too far, though I’m getting slightly impatient. Impatient cos I miss him so much. I want to get his attention so much but I don’t want to create drama and all that. I reduce my availability to him, to the extent of putting any notifications from watsapp on mute mode. I had a few missed calls and some messages. He’s the kind of guy that doesn’t want to show that he really wants me badly. Maybe it’s how men operates or …male ego? Kinda hard decipher his actions. Please help me with this.

  15. Avatar

    Sally

    September 11, 2018 at 3:21 am

    Hi Chris,

    Im not in a tiff with my husband. Can I use no contact to make my husband desire me? If it is, what’s the no contact rule will be like?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 11, 2018 at 3:27 am

      Hi Sally….I think there are other, better tactics to arouse your husband.

  16. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 8, 2018 at 11:00 am

    Hi Chris. But technically we were friends with benefits since March. We just argued a lot pretty much so how would he compare me with his girlfriend? To be honest I think he’s always had a girlfriend. I don’t think I mean anything to him even though I got pregnant by him. Haven’t seen him in 1 and a half months but haven’t been in contact for 21 days. What do I do? I feel lost as I’m blocked from everywhere. I’ve looked on your site about things. Did you manage to find the timeline of posting?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 9, 2018 at 5:21 am

      Hi Danielle…probably best to continue in NC as well as pull back and give yourself time to reflect on if you wish to invest any more of yourself in this person. He seems to be focused on self interest.

  17. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 7, 2018 at 6:29 pm

    Hi Chris thanks for your reply. But what am I meant to do when the 28 days of no contact is up because he has blocked me from everywhere. However I haven’t blocked me from anywhere. I feel like he doesn’t care and most prob isn’t checking up on me as he already has a girlfriend. I’m feeling drained. He knows I had a miscarriage and not once did he call to find out to see how I am. Before he told me to stop contacting me and etc, he said so much stuff like he hates me. When I think about it, it hurts. I’m on 21 days of no contact and I don’t feel that he doesn’t miss me at all. Please help. I’m alwahs posting photos of me smiling on Instagram but he’s also blocked me on that so not sure if he will ever see

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 7, 2018 at 10:55 pm

      Hi Danielle!

      I understand and you may be right, but guys can be notorious about stalking their ex, particularly when they start having a few little issues with whoever they may be dating. They starting comparing and that leads them to check up on you.

  18. Avatar

    Taylor

    September 6, 2018 at 5:49 am

    Hey Chris,

    So shortly before my ex ended things his grandmother passed away. I know when the memorial is and was thinking about texting him to just say a brief “thinking about you and your family today, hope y’all are doing alright” and leaving it at that. Would this appropriate for first contact? Also, is it too soon? It would have only been about 3 weeks since he ended things.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 7, 2018 at 4:12 am

      Hi Taylor!

      I think that is a good idea.

  19. Avatar

    Danielle

    September 4, 2018 at 2:33 pm

    I’m on 18 days of no contact and for the past 5 days I’ve been positing on instagram. Right now I feel so down, extra down. He hasn’t unblocked me from anything, he’s most prob having an amazing time without me and meeting up with his gf. I know we weren’t in a relationship but a friends with benefits kinda thing but will he miss me? I feel like calling him with no number but that wouldn’t work, he’d most prob have a go at me. I feel down and don’t feel good enough. And after the termination he hasn’t even bothered to call once to see how I am. Does a guy not feel any remorse or guilt?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 4, 2018 at 9:19 pm

      Hi Danielle!

      Guys do feel that….all people do, but some folks just push it away. NC requires patience and is not an inactive process. There are things you should be doing for your own personal recovery.

  20. Avatar

    Danielle

    August 24, 2018 at 2:25 pm

    Hi Chris thanks for the reply. I have been in no contact for 7 days now. I haven’t posted anything on Instagram yet or WhatsApp. He’s blocked me fully. Do you think I should start posting on social media? Or wait due to my miscarriage. Sometimes I feel down because it doesn’t affect him.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 24, 2018 at 11:57 pm

      Your welcome Danielle!

      Yes, social media postings are a good outlet. Its OK to feel down. Just let it all hang out one night. Even if its pulling the covers over your head and having a good cry. Do me a favor. Give yourself a big hug and tell yourself how much you love yourself and how you are really special! Because you are.

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