How To Know If Your Ex Boyfriend Still Loves You - Signs Your Ex Is Still Interested

1,415 thoughts on “This Is How You Know If Your Ex Still Loves You”

Confused

October 22, 2013 at 5:26 am

So my ex contacted me after 6 years of us being broken up and he asked me to marry him. Long story short, I said no. A year later, I finally decide to try out Facebook again and he adds me quickly. He inboxes me one day and we talk nonchalantly and he tells me he has a baby now but he’s not with the mom (apparently he never was, she was a one night stand). So he asked me if I am okay with him having a child. I told him yeah, then he asked me if I was single and if I still cared about him. I answered truthfully and he told me how he felt. We’re not going out or anything but I’m just wondering if he’s worth pursing?

admin

October 23, 2013 at 6:57 pm

He is only worth pursuing if you feel he is worth it!

Curious

October 22, 2013 at 3:23 am

Me and my boyfriend broke up after 8yrs. It was an interfaith relationship and we both use to speak about it extensively. We did not leave any stone unturned and were planning to get married in a couple of yrs. We r both in mid twenties. Suddenly one evening my boyfriends says he is uncomfortable with this relationship and dont think he can carry forward for here on. So he breaks up with me….but still lives with me. We do not share the same bed or bathroom and we infact stay on different floors. Its a matter of convenience he says and we had just renewed our lease.
My question is how can I enforce the NC rule in this situation? Every time he sees me, he tries to talk to me as if nothing has happened between us. He tries to do little things, just as he did when we were in a relationship. I havnt spoken to him since we broke up unless for a nod, yes or no. I try to hide myself whenever he is around. He gets on my nerves when he tries to initiate a conversation, because the only thing that runs in my head is he is the one who wanted out, and I need my time to heal. What should I do? I am confused and torn.

admin

October 23, 2013 at 6:50 pm

Well, you really can’t. You are going to have to do limited contact. Basically act like a very respectful roomate!

lollipopgirl

October 22, 2013 at 2:02 am

my ex and i broke up 4 years ago, he cheated on me with my best friend and got her pregnant. i started messing around with his brother just for fun. his brother and i hooked up for about 3 months and we quit talking for three years and then we started dating i have been with him for 3 years and now have two kids with him. my ex lives upstairs right above me. i catch him going out of his way to ask me random questions and trying to make it a point to make eye contact with me. does he still love me? he was furious with me and his brother for the longest time. i still have feelings for him but only because he was my first love.

admin

October 22, 2013 at 10:27 pm

Man that is bad. Got your best friend pregnant.

I guess my question to you is: what do you want? Do you want him back? Or are you just looking to move on?

stella

October 21, 2013 at 3:03 pm

we have in a relationship for two months and he suddenly insisted on a breakup following a quarrel that was initiated due to the fact that he always vents out all his frustration on me and having failed to realise the reason behind his coldness I replied back rudely and a quarrel had started..He said we should break up reason being he ends up hurting me unnecessarily and would just not budge to anything I said…when I finally made up my mind and said that am okay with your decision he started crying badly..a 15 days holiday followed..so the breakup was again called off..he wanted time off..and we did not speak for around 10 days..but the little off and on we do now I know that he loves me madly but I just can’t figure out why is he running away from this..one moment he is very cold and insists that there is nothing between us and the next moment he makes me feel extremely special..could you please help?

admin

October 22, 2013 at 2:04 am

All over the place isn’t he.

Have you done NC in the past?
stella

October 22, 2013 at 8:53 am

yes i did but not as long as a month..the problem with him is one moment he makes me feel so unwanted and behaves so rudely..and the next moment his actions are totally different..his gestures speak totally opposite as if I am the special one and he could just not think of anyone else..after not having spoken for 10 days he did stop being rude but I just can’t understand what he wants..He is just too confused about what he wants..
admin

October 23, 2013 at 7:32 pm

Men are confusing sometimes huh?

Well, what are his actions saying?

Heartbroken

October 21, 2013 at 2:47 pm

Thank you for your articles! Very helpful. My ex bf broke up with me after 3.5 years to “sow his wild oats” since he hasn’t had many women. This is our 4th break up, he broke up with me each time. This is the first time he wanted to so he could have sex with other women. I did the NC rule and he texted me after 3 weeks to say Happy Birthday. But also said when he’s with other women I come up in the conversation and it’s all nice things. Ouch! I told him I don’t want any contact with him, that it’s easier for me this way. And it really is! Ignorance is bliss! But he said he hopes he can someday keep me in his life. I don’t want to be friends. If it’s not a full commitment I don’t want him in my life. I have not heard from him since that text 3 weeks ago and wonder if I will hear from him. We are in our 40’s and I thought he was the one and loved and respected him. I see now he didn’t feel the same but he contacted me. Why would he if he wanted to break up and have sex with other women. I’m so hurt and just feel like he chose to have cheap meaningless sex over the relationship we had and the way I treated him. P.S. I loved having sex with him and never said NO so I know he wasn’t bored in the bedroom. But I feel like nothing because I was traded in for sex with strangers. Will he contact me again? And will he eventually see the grass isn’t always greener?

admin

October 22, 2013 at 2:03 am

Well, part of the problem is that having sex with him after breaking up with him sets you up for being friends with benefits…
Heartbroken

October 22, 2013 at 11:54 am

Thank you for the reply. We were sleeping together right after the break up and weren’t sleeping with anyone else, but we went out together on dates too so I thought maybe he would change his mind which he didn’t do. So because he was hot and cold I told him I was done and that’s when he told me he had gone out on a date. I have not contacted him since until he had texted me for my birthday. I was just wondering if men come back after “sowing their wild oats”? He always threw out things like if I come back it’s a risk I take that you are available or someday I want to keep you in my life. I’m so tired of the strings he keeps. Why isn’t he just saying I’m moving on and have a good life too. He is playing with my heart when he’s the one who wanted the break up.
admin

October 23, 2013 at 7:48 pm

By any chance have you read this article: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/the-definitive-guide-to-making-your-ex-boyfriend-love-you-again/
Heartbroken

October 23, 2013 at 11:39 pm

Thank you for the great advice. I read the article you mentioned and I want to be the “ungettable girl” for someone else. Not my ex. He doesn’t deserve another chance. You really are doing a great thing by helping us women who have lost hope by putting things in perspective from a man’s point of view. I see now that my ex should be the one wondering if I will ever come back and love him again! We need to realize that we are great as we are and deserve better than hoping some guy comes back who honestly didn’t treat us the way a good bf should in the first place.If the love is there then it’s worth fighting for absolutely, but for me it’s time to move on..Thanks Chris!!
admin

October 24, 2013 at 7:33 pm

Hahah

Glad I could help you come to that relization! Made my day!

Sophia

October 20, 2013 at 9:43 pm

my ex and I dated for a year. he broke up with me about eight months ago. he’s had plenty of girlfriends after me but I’ve noticed that whenever he breaks up with a girl or a girl breaks up with him, he always comes to me and starts to flirt. and once he finds another girl, he stops talking to me. does this mean he likes me or he just wants someone to fool around with while he’s single?

admin

October 22, 2013 at 12:57 am

It means YOU need to do a better job of making him chase you.

Coincidentally I have an article coming up over that very topic.

holly

October 20, 2013 at 8:56 am

My ex and I were together for 2 and a half years on and off. This past breakup was 2 months ago. I intended on moving on but he still keeps contact since I don’t text him first. He will ask about my son and ask to see him(not his son) or how my day is. I’m unsure about what his motives are because he will be nice but if I mention anything about other guys or how well my modeling is going, he flips out on me and puts me down. What’s the deal here? I can’t tell whether he loves me or hates me.

admin

October 20, 2013 at 9:04 pm

Ok, he is insecure about your looks. YES your looks. He is projecting his own insecurity about himself on to you. At least that is what it sounds like to me.
holly

October 21, 2013 at 9:01 am

Wow, thank you!! I never would have guessed it because he would call me ugly lol but I guess he wanted me to believe that I’m ugly to make himself feel better. Do you think he may still have feelings for me? I’m glad that I found your site!
admin

October 22, 2013 at 1:41 am

I wish I knew him so I could tell you but I don’t.

I think feelings are there certainly though.

Hope

October 19, 2013 at 11:35 pm

Hey, Chris.

So my ex and I dated off and on for about a year and a half. We broke up about 2 years ago. It seems like every year since we broke up around this time, I go through a stage where I want to be with him again. I text him and flirt and try to get him back. I know he still thinks about me, because he stares at me when I see him in public, and he sends me snapchats every day. I never know if he is just trying to get some ass or maybe still has feelings. I’ve tried to no contact thing.. I didn’t contact him for about 6 months and he and his girlfriend broke up and he’s single again.. What should I do?

admin

October 20, 2013 at 8:43 pm

At this point don’t jump on him right away. let about a week go by and then reach out to him.

Krystal

October 19, 2013 at 4:11 am

My ex an I were together for just over 4 years but in the 4 years for a year an 7 months now we have been in a long distance relationship as I moved to Sydney for us to start a better life an my ex stayed in New Zealand but had been saying he will move to us. Well he booked tickets to flight to us just before Xmas 2012 but never turned up the excuse was had no money. Four months ago from now he told me over the phone that he has falling out of love with me and just a little over a month ago he broke up with me because he needed affection He said he has a girlfriend but the last 3 weeks he has been calling me from his job a hasn’t mention his girlfriend at all. Well anyway before all this happened I had already book plane tickets for me an our kids to move back to nz I asked my ex last week if he would give us another chance an he said yes but that he doesn’t want to get my hopes up then he said I still care about u tho. I want to do the no contact thing but we have an arrangement were I call him Tuesdays at 6pm oz time an he rings Thursday after work this is to communicate with our kids and not only that our daughter rings him off my phone
A lot an he thinks it me even tho I’ve told him it our girl

admin

October 19, 2013 at 8:41 pm

Have you started any form of NC yet?

Also, have you read the LDR post?

Kaitlin

October 18, 2013 at 7:14 pm

First off, I’d like to thank you for the articles you write. They have helped me tremendously with a difficult breakup. However, I’m dealing with some confusion. My ex and I were together for 3 and a half years. We moved in together, which I thought was exciting for us both since neither of us had lived with a S.O. before. 2 months into living together and he breaks up with me. Unfortunately, he acted out making the breakup more difficult for me by using power plays, changing the locks on the apartment before I got all my things, and threatening to call the police at one time. I didn’t do anything to provoke those responses. I never got a clear reason for the breakup. I do not want him back and have had NC since he paid some money he owed me. A week after that monetary exchange he texted me a few times just saying hey, how are you. When I didn’t respond after a few days he texted me that he met someone and thought I would want to know. I know he wasn’t cheating, but he is with someone new only a few weeks after our breakup. I still have not contacted him, but can you provide some insight as to why he even bothered to let me know he found someone new? Also, does this sound like a rebound?

admin

October 19, 2013 at 7:36 pm

Have you read the rebound article? You can tell if his new girl is a rebound.

Caramel kisses

October 18, 2013 at 2:59 am

Hello,
I need a little insight. My ex and I have been together a year and 6 months. We lived together but with our current breakup, he moved out and is now staying with relatives. Lately he’s been using reverse psychology and sadly it’s been working but only because I’m more mature.
Anywho, we had a serious fight in public and followed was a breakup. Just recent to that (a couple of days prior) he mentioned taking a break. I don’t believe in breaks but I agreed and that was the end of that.
Some events have occurred that gave an opening for a discussion so I’ve reached out via txt due to concern and he responded but there’s no emotion. I’ve expressed and admitted my faults but he won’t his and instead he places blame on me for everything and needs time because lately he’s been wanting to be alone but I’ve noticed change since I’m making more than him but keep in mind I’m older. It’s been about a week but I just think this whole thing is stupid.
What should I do? Please help me!

admin

October 18, 2013 at 6:49 pm

Are you making a lot more than him? Some men get all insecure about this.

I agree, breakups are really really stupid.

Have you tried the NC rule yet?
Caramel kisses

October 22, 2013 at 1:51 am

Since posting to this site the first time, I have been sticking to the NC rule but he hasn’t reached out to me. Should I just forget about it and detach myself? I don’t want to hold on when he may not be. What if he’s seriously done investing and trying and has been talking to others and attempting to get in a relationship or have relations with others as I sit around loyal to him waiting for him to come back. I just have no clue on how to act on these circumstances.
admin

October 22, 2013 at 10:25 pm

I guess the real question is: do you think your life is better without him in it?

Super Confused

October 16, 2013 at 11:18 pm

My ex boyfriend txted me with a new phone number after six weeks of no contact. He said “happy b-day” my birthday was a week ago. I responded telling the person that “my contacts had been erased when i updated my phone last month, who is this?” he said something about it being the type of phone i had and continued to ask how my birthday was. I told him “I still dont know who this is?” He then asked where i went (assuming he’s talking about my birthday. I did not respond again because he did not say who it was, but by the way he was communicating it sounds like my ex. Should i have stopped the txting?

admin

October 17, 2013 at 2:42 am

Yea I think you should have.
Super Confused

October 18, 2013 at 10:18 pm

I did stop, I left it at “i still do not know who this is.” he continued asking how was my birthday and one more text asking me where I went for my birthday. What do you think the game is? and do you think he will try again, since i didnt play into it?
admin

October 19, 2013 at 8:10 pm

Its one weird game thats for sure. Though, i can tell you that some of the stuff I see guys pull now-adays make me cringe.
Super Confused

October 20, 2013 at 5:01 am

So if he’s curious and I didn’t really respond, is it likely that he will try and contact me again?
admin

October 20, 2013 at 8:57 pm

Probably. I can’t give you a guarantee though.
Super Confused

October 18, 2013 at 10:40 pm

I should give you a little bit of background to help you answer my question. We were together 3+ years. We had known eachother since high school, but now are in our 40’s. He broke up with me for the second time at the end of July and I emailed him a closure letter on Labor Day weekend. The email basically told him what I thought of him and how he treated me (lied, cheated, and used me for financial gain). He responded quickly and told me that I had no idea what he had been going through and to leave him and his family alone!!! I waited several days and emailed him back telling him that I didnt care anymore what he was going through, the letter was for closure, and that he no longer had control over me and who I talked to. Six weeks later he texts me. I have turned the table completely from my behavior the last time we split up. I used to hang on his every word and kept reaching out to him so that he didnt forget me. Now that the tables have turned, do you think he will be curious as to whether or not I have really moved on?
admin

October 19, 2013 at 8:11 pm

I think he is definitely curious!

Maria Torres

October 16, 2013 at 2:12 am

So i’ve been seeing this guy for like 3years on and off well first we were in a relationship but then he broke it off after three months and we continue seeing each other like friends with benefits then we stop about 10 months we were both in different relationships and just this year we see each other every other month we text then he ignors my text but he drunk calls and I fall everytime but just this Weekend I asked if he still had some kind of feelings for me and he respond I don’t know I try not to what does this means? Help

admin

October 17, 2013 at 1:36 am

It means he does and he can’t help it no matter what.
Maria Torres

October 19, 2013 at 10:05 pm

After I wrote to you I started the the N C rule I guess I’ll see what happens now. .
admin

October 20, 2013 at 8:40 pm

Good, What you do during NC is just as important though remember that.

H

October 15, 2013 at 11:52 pm

My ex boyfriend broke up with me at the beginning of August. I immediately began my NC and two weeks into he sent me a message asking how I was. I broke down and responded to him about 5 hours later. We talked for hours and he even brought up how he missed and wanted to try taking things slow and seeing where things ended up. Everything was going alright until he moved to a new city an hour away for his job. Three weeks into it he tells me that he just wants to be single so he can focus on his career because he can’t handle the pressure of being a great boyfriend. Of course I was extremely upset and said a lot of things that I shouldn’t have. We didn’t talk at all for about a week and I felt so terrible about what I said that I just sent him a simple apology. He immediately responded saying that he understands completely and then just began a normal conversation with me. Since then he contacts me in some way everyday. He ALWAYS initiates the first contact. Even last week he began questioning me about another guy that was commenting on one of my Facebook pictures and my ex said that “we” should adjust my privacy settings. LOL. This has been going on for about a month now. What I’m unsure about is if he is just trying to be friendly by talking to me or if he still wants me. I also don’t know what I should do. I don’t want to be straightforward because I want to give him time to figure things out but I also don’t want to wait around for forever. What is your best advice for me at this point?

admin

October 17, 2013 at 1:28 am

The truth probably lies in teh middle somewhere. he wants to be friendly but feelings are still there. Your still doing NC right? Finish it out at this point.
H

October 17, 2013 at 11:02 pm

Actually, I’ve be communicating with him this past month. It’s usually a light, easy-going conversation and maybe some flirting occasionally. I just don’t know if I should ask him about us because I do not want to say anything to soon and scare him away but not giving him his space. Do you think he’ll make a move anytime soon? I’ve been trying to follow your section about how long it will take to get your ex back, but I’m still a bit unsure. By the way your new article “The Ungettable Girl” is AWESOME! Definitely taking those tips! 🙂
admin

October 18, 2013 at 6:25 pm

Its a tricky business isn’t it? Getting your ex back I mean.

Thanks I like writing about the ungettable girl! So, I am so glad you liked it. One woman didn’t apparantely and chewed me out via email but oh well.
H

October 19, 2013 at 1:26 am

Soo tricky…some days I feel super confident about it and other days I feel so hopeless. As for the woman who chewed you out, I guess some people can’t handle the truth. Like you said, we’re here to know how men think and get our exes back. You’re not going to sugarcoat the truth to make us feel better.
admin

October 19, 2013 at 8:27 pm

Yes, I agree with your thoughts on not sugar coating the truth but I have come to realize there will always be a segment of the people who come to this site that don’t want to hear the truth. They just want to hear what they want to hear.
H

October 17, 2013 at 11:03 pm

whoops I meant by* not giving him his space

Confused

October 15, 2013 at 6:01 am

My ex boyfriend and I dated for almost 3 years. He’s two years older. I left and moved away to go to college about 8 months into the relationship, although we would see each other during holidays, some weekends, and vacations. A great deal of the relationship was long distance. Anyway, 2 days before I left back to start my junior year of college he asked to meet up(at one of our spots) and he basically said he thought it was best we part. I wasn’t surprised because we weren’t exactly in the best of places in our relationship, but being a girl, of course I was willing to work it out as we always had before(we’d never broken up before but the thought had been brought up a few times). But this time, I didn’t want to fight it so I maintained my dignity, I said okay fine and the whole break up happened within a 15 minute span. We both cried, he asked for a hug and we cried in eachothers arms for about 3mins. Then I told him to leave, he said it wasn’t me it was him, that I was perfect and he needed to get his life together but did not want to hold me back in the process.Also he said he wasn’t “ready for this”. He wished me good luck with school and I did the same. While it’s true he’s far less accomplished than I, I always looked past it. So I haven’t really contacted him. I continued to follow him on instagram for about a month after the breakup. About 2 weeks ago I unfollowed him, he’s still following me. After the breakup I only liked one picture of his, he liked one of mine(while I was still following him). However after I unfollowed him(I would expect him to unfollow me too) he’s continued liking some of my pics. I’m not sure how to interpret this. I’ve been trying to make peace with the break up, doing my best to move on. For the most part I feel that I have been doing well,its not my first big heartbreak, but I’m just curious as to whether he’s moved on or whether he’s going to attempt to come back. As of now he hasn’t tried calling me or messaging me.

admin

October 16, 2013 at 1:57 am

So, I take it that you are in NC currently?

He is definitely thinking about you and probably missing you at times. I can tell you that much with what I know about men.
Confused

October 16, 2013 at 4:36 am

yea I’ve had no contact with him, do you anticipate he’ll be contacting me at all?
admin

October 17, 2013 at 1:54 am

Hard to say. It depends on a lot of factors (many out of your control.) So, I can’t give you a definite answer.

Fotini

October 14, 2013 at 7:31 am

I broke up with my boyfriend about 6 months ago and I moved on to someone else right away. It was the biggest mistake because I haven’t stopped missing him. I still love him. We were together for 1 years and 7 months. Just recently we’ve started talking and I asked him to go for coffee and we went. When we were together, he told me that we we’re friends and if I was ok with that.. What does that mean? Also, he kept bringing up our past relationship and how he knew me so much. We were in his car and he just looked at me and said, you’re laughing like you did when we first starting dating. He said that it was a good time in the beginning. He’s always bringing up the past. He also told me that he was thinking of marrying me and now we’re just sitting here having coffee. What does this mean? He kept talking about my ex and how weird he was. Does he still miss me? I need to know!

admin

October 15, 2013 at 1:56 am

Definitely. He definitely misses you.
Fotini

October 15, 2013 at 7:37 am

Should I ask him if he still misses me or should I wait? I just saw him again today but we weren’t really alone. He looked shy though 🙁
admin

October 16, 2013 at 1:55 am

Definitely wait.

Alice

October 14, 2013 at 2:53 am

I dated this guy for over four months and a few days ago, he broke up with me because he lost a family member. Will these rules still apply or will we be able to get together again?
I’m sorry if this seems like a weird question but it’s just that I really love him and I know he does too because he told me the day before we broke up.

admin

October 15, 2013 at 1:46 am

Yes the rules still apply.

natalie

October 14, 2013 at 1:58 am

Well .. I met this guy in the summer and we had a great and magical time on his vacation. We ”fell in love” and we decided to start a long distance relationtionship and we have been together for the last 3 months. everything was perfect until he broke up with me because he has some big family problems and he is stressed. he still claims se wants me and i’m the best thing that has happened to him or sth :/ after we broke up there’s no contat from his side for a few days now. Should i contact him? the thing is because of the distance i won’t be able to see him and i want to know how he is doing. i would like to get him back 🙂

admin

October 15, 2013 at 1:44 am

Have you read the LDR post yet?
natalie

October 20, 2013 at 3:37 pm

Actually i have read it … I am at day 10 of the NCR :/ but our relationship lasted almost 3 months and i find it too long to wait 1 whole month.. what if he finds another girl in that period .. ?
admin

October 20, 2013 at 9:10 pm

Its possible but if it happens it could be a rebound. You can shorten it to 21 days but I usually recommend the full month.
natalie

October 21, 2013 at 9:50 am

i will be patient for a little more then and try 21 days.. i don’t think he has a rebound relationship but i think he is considering or has already done something with another girl. do you think i should stick with the rules anyway? i thought of sending him a letter too at some point..
admin

October 22, 2013 at 1:46 am

How long has he been dating her again?

surya

October 13, 2013 at 9:10 pm

I am confused whether to move on or hold on as I love my ex and we have broke up for the third time in our three years relationship.
The problem was I didn’t like him giving more importance to other girls.
Also he had cheated on me before and after that we didn’t talk for 4 months and then we reunited.
Everything was going on well and then he broke up with me stating that I never trust him and always had problem with girls who talk with him.
I was afraid to lose him.
He had lied to me several times I still gave him chance knowing that he won’t leave me.
Now we have broke up and are not in contact
I have blocked him but end up viewing his pages on net through friends id.
My parents and my friends ask me to move on as he didn’t even once take me to meet his parents at his home

admin

October 15, 2013 at 1:23 am

That might be a warning sign. He never took you to see his parents?
surya

October 13, 2013 at 9:19 pm

M disturbed…
Please help me !
This time he didn’t cheat but he blamed me for the break up
And on my birthday he wished me but I told him I don’t need anything from a fake person.
And from that day till now nc is on.
One month is nt completed.what hurts the most is he promised that he will never ever leave me and he did leave me.
If I go back my family and friends won’t support me.
I know they care for me and so they told me to move on.
He lied me about the house that he lives in and when I came to know he is poor I didn’t leave him but he left me because I argued with him over a girl.

Brittany

October 13, 2013 at 7:33 pm

my ex and I broke up 2 months ago and it has been hell. he cheated on me and that’s what caused the breakup. we were together for about 6 months, and we were looking at houses to move in together (im guessing after he cheated). after the breakup, we tried talking and things weren’t so bad, but now he talks to me like complete garbage. he’s the one who messed up oir relationship but im the one being treated badly. for some stupid reason, I can’t get over him. he talks to me horribly, but would the NC even help with this situation? hes already been sleeping with a few other women which is gross but I guess its his way of ignoring any feelings about the breakup.

admin

October 13, 2013 at 10:53 pm

Yes I think it would help a lot!

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1,415 thoughts on “This Is How You Know If Your Ex Still Loves You”